Aug. 18, 2025

(no music) Mental Health Review | LMBYTS #1414 | Jason Newland | 19th August 2025

(no music) Mental Health Review | LMBYTS #1414 | Jason Newland | 19th August 2025
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Oh, hello, and welcome to Jason Newland dot com com

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com ado. How are you? Are you well? So this

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is let me buoy you to sleep. Please only listen

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when you can safely close your eyes. My name is

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Jason Newland. Yes, and today is Tuesday, the nineteenth of August. Wow.

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And then he said April April. But to be fair,

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I've just woken up. I want to say, just woken up,

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I would say within the last six minutes. Yeah, I

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don't know how long does it take to a we

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wi even take a tablet and walk back in, walk

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into the living room and then yeah, then then get

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back out and tear different light on, turn the main

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light off, and turn a smaller light on in the

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living room. So walk up there thinking oh, I haven't

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got any shoes on, my slippers or my crocs. I

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hope there's nothing on the floor that hurts my foot.

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And then on the way back to my chair, I'm

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thinking and remembering my dad once kneeled on a knelt

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on a nail in a loft because he was an electrician,

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and thinking, oh, I must have been painful. And I

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sat down on a chair and thinking, yeah, that's really

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a nice painful thing he ever went through. Then I thought, yeah,

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but he's he was in the other things once. But

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then maybe you know, the adrenaline and stuff that would

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have kicked in. And then I thought, why I think

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about this? It's a weird thing to think about. And uh,

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and then is this even registering? And then I I thought,

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I'm just gonna got this thing set up, and here

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we are. And then then he walked in just as

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I was getting the recording ready, and yeah, he came in,

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plodded in. I don't think he was even awake, to

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be fair, half awake maybe, And he jumped onto the

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chair to go to sleep next to me, covered up

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next to me. And here he is. He's asleep. It's

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fast asleep, not even a little bit of sleep, but

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a lot of sleep. But in reality, I can't really know,

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can I? I can't know that he might be sitting there,

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wide awake, thinking of all the naughty things he's going

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to do in the coming day. I don't know. I'm thinking, Oh,

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how how can I wind up Daddy today? Oh? I

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know what? I glue his ears together? I don't know,

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you no idea what's going on in his little mind?

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This is the sausage. That's what he used to be called.

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That's what Uncle Sausages called him. He called he called Vinnie.

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He started calling Vinnie's sausages sausages sausages. He started saying,

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how sausages today? Is he good? How? He didn't say

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is he good? That's something that's a term he never

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really used. Is he good? No? But I mean you

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didn't know that. I didn't need to tell you that.

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It's not relevant, really, is it? What kind of phrases

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he used in his day to day bit the better

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of language? All I know is I used a lot

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more words than I do. Yeah, he's definitely that too,

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is weird? Right? Uncle Sausages said to me, right, and

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he was in wow. Yeah. This was one of the

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last times I actually had a conversation with him, possibly

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the last time. Oh, that's my stomach. You're going to

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get that a lot. I think that's going to be

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the background sounds for this recording. Good, my dummy. I

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want some food. Oh is it just attention? No, it's food.

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I want food. I don't want attention. I want food. Okay,

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give me some food. What would you like? I'd like

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you to give me some ready break. Is there anything else? Yes,

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stop asking questions, just get me the ready break. So yeah, yeah,

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uncle sausages or shuttages. He said, right, why don't we

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make a podcast? And then he said, what don't you

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make a podcast and make it funny? I said, okay,

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he said. I didn't really know what he wanted. He said, yeah,

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we should do a podcast. And he wanted me to

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write it. Wanted me to think up a funny script

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for me and him to say. And as you will

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well be aware if you regular listen to this webinar,

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you know that I don't write no script for this

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or don't or don't write no script ever if ever,

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and I ain't never gonna no, I ain't never gonna

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do it. BlimE me. If this, if there was a script,

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then I need to get I need to sack the

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script writer and get me in some proper professional writers.

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And I didn't really know what he wanted. I said, oh,

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can't let me write scripts? He said, go on, you

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can use your brain like it's not, but don't. Why

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do you assume I can use my brain? Don't. Don't

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overestimate my powers to use my brain? Come on, ah, Anyway,

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the irony of that was I said to Uncle's Sausages

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years ago, and I'm talking when I've probably first met him,

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that he should do a podcast because he was so

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into sport. He could have done a podcast on sport.

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There's a little bit of a gat. There wasn't there

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a little bit of a pause? Even I noticed it.

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There's another one. I said to him, should do a podcast.

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What's that? Well, it's like a radio show, really, except

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it's not a live audience. It's just you posted it afterwards.

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It can be like a radio show. And he said, okay.

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It wasn't interested. And I told said I must have

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mentioned it to him loads of times over the years.

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I even said to him, look, I've got equipment you

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can use if you do it with me. I said, no,

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do it with no. I don't think even asked that.

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But I didn't really want to do it with him

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because I don't know the very first thing about sport

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apart from boxing. And I make that. I make that

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up as well. Boxing. I can't even spell it b

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O X I N G oh, yes, I can. Wow,

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I'm cleveras and I thought it I was. I is

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so yesterday yesterday I had to go to the doctors.

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So I after nearly fifty five five years, I'm starting

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to get used to myself. I'm starting to be able

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to kind of predict how I'm going to be. And

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for that reason, I ordered a taxi. I called up

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a taxi service Sunday, but late afternoon and ordered a

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taxi for one. Might have been in the evening, maybe

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at six o'clock something, at six point thirty. It's not

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that relevant, is it. Do you need the precise time?

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Do you need to know what I was wearing when

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I made the phone call? Yeah, I was wearing a basque.

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Do you even know what I was eating? I can

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tell you what I was eating. I wasn't I was

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just sucking on a lollipop. It was banana flavor, which

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is weird. You might think this is the whole You

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might think this is weird. The weirdest thing about it

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is it was a red lollipop, but it tasted banana.

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You might think being dressed as in a basque and

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with like a fish tail, like a mermaid in a basque.

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Basically that's what I was dressed like. You know, I

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think that's the weirdest thing. But I personally think the

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weirdest thing is a red lollipop the tastes a banana.

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That that's mind bobbling. It is just it can't get

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me hit around it. A red lollipop that tastes of banana. Now,

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when't I say it taste of banana? It tastes of

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banana flavor. It's like strawberry tastes of strawberry flavor. They

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don't taste nothing like strawberries today, and banana flavor stuff

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don't taste nothing like banana. It tastes like banana flavor.

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And I'm just used to what banana flavor is, like

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the banana flavor milkshakes or the banana flavor you know,

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sweets doesn't taste anything like banana, nothing like it. It's

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a pack of lies. I'll never be so angry. So

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I ordered the taxi for one o'clock on Monday, which

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was yesterday, so Sunday evening about half six. I thought

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the appointment was eleven o'clock, but it was two. So

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I ordered a taxi for one knowing this is if

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I've ordered a taxi. As I get closer to the time,

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I can't cancel it. Well, I can't cancel it. I

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suppose technically could his phone up say yeah, I'd like

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to cancel the taxi Okay, by then I know I

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could do that, But then that's two phone calls, because

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I'd also have to phone up the doctors and cancel that.

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And they said in the letter, if you don't turn

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up for this mental health review, we're gonna we might

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cut down your medication so that you can only collect

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it once a week instead of once a month, which

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means going to the pharmacy every single week. And I thought, no, no, no, no,

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I don't want that for myself, you know, so it

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was relatively important to go along to this review. Well,

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I'm glad. I did know later that lady was very

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nice and I kind of understand why I have them now.

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So I I get up, I go to bed Sunday,

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get up in the morning Monday, I think, I think,

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I don't know, did I did I wake Oh I

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don't know. I'm not sure what time I woke up,

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but I did wake up at some point. In fact,

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I think I woke up quite early in the morning.

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And then because I went to bed early, and then

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I went back to bed for another nap and I

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made a recording. Yeah, I did yesterday's recording. Now I

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was going to do two recordings yesterday. This technically is

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the second part of that recording. But I was so

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tired in the evening I just couldn't do it. That

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the day necked me out of it. Uh. I think

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it's just a deal that the people dealing with people

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being around and you know. So I went to a

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few different places and by the time I got home,

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so I left here at one. It's actually got it

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at one. I got home. Well, I got the pretty

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about quarter past four bus back, which probably took about

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which took me probably about another half hour including a

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bus ride half hour roughly to get home maybe. So

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I was back home by about ten to five, maybe

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five to five, ten to five, bearing in mind number

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quite a slow walker. So the bus took me part

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of the way, you know, and then I walked the

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rest of the way. So, yeah, I was home before five,

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which meant i'd been out for four hours. I had

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something to eat, and then it was like six o'clock

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and I'd lie down for about an hour just over now.

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I got up, I took took Smelly Belly out for

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a wonder, and then you know, the evening was kind

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of done, really and I was tired, and I ended

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up going to bed about half at twenty twenty three

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minutes past ten. I think it was. It's very precise,

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isn't it very precise? And yeah, so I leave here

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at one o'clock. Vinny was that he did not want

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me to leave, really did not want me to leave.

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But you know, I couldn't take him with me. So

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I got up yesterday morning, I did I took I

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took him out in the morning, and then I came home.

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I did the recording, I said, I did the recording.

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I didn't upload it until I got home, or edit

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and upload it till I got home. So I did

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the recording and then I had a shower, got dressed.

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I think I jumped in his shower about twelve thirty

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eight pm. So I didn't leave myself a lot of

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time to prepare myself, to prepare myself what for to

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you know, get myself ready. And when I got out

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of shower, the taxi was downstairs already, but it was early,

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so you know, I ordered for one o'clock. I forgets

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ten to one. That's not my issue. Although I think

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I might have paid for him to wait. I don't know,

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So it's weird, right, I get into a taxi and

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I say it all right, okay. I think my attitude

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didn't help because just as I was, I was getting ready,

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getting my water bottle, getting my gotta have my bottle.

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Me but but some water bottle and make me back.

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I was looking for my wallet because you know, the

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plan was to get a bus back. My bus passes

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in my wallet and also money, so to do what

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I needed to do, I needed to have the money

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in the wallet. Look, an I find my wallet. No,

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I can't. And I had minutes to find my wallet

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and I couldn't find it, and I was, I'll be

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honest with you, I didn't feel at all christmasy. It

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really didn't feel good about it. It's like, this is

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annoying me. Where's my wallet? There must be some kind

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of gadget to put in the wallet, you know, like

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when you lose your phone, you know, so use if

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you lose your phone somewhere in the house, and so

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why don't you just call it? I can't call it

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because I haven't got the phone, have I Why don't

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just phone it? I need my phone to phone it,

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don't I if I knew where my phone was, then

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I could phone myself. Yeah, but maybe something like that

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where you can press a button and you're like, peep, peep, peep,

232
00:23:27.960 --> 00:23:32.400
I'm over here, daddy, movie here, say me if you

233
00:23:32.519 --> 00:23:37.880
can oooh, that could be what the wallet does. I

234
00:23:37.920 --> 00:23:41.279
don't know why you'd have it say stuff like that,

235
00:23:43.200 --> 00:23:52.640
same HEDI you're warmer, you're warmer wor cold? Just getting cold? Oh? Warmer, warmer,

236
00:23:53.079 --> 00:24:01.160
warmer hot. I'm joking nowhere near me, which would be

237
00:24:01.200 --> 00:24:07.519
probably even more annoying. Actually, so I couldn't from wallet.

238
00:24:07.839 --> 00:24:14.920
And I'm thinking to myself through the couple of weeks

239
00:24:14.960 --> 00:24:19.079
ago or last week, whenever it was when I was

240
00:24:19.279 --> 00:24:24.200
started tidying this place up and checking stuff out, did

241
00:24:24.240 --> 00:24:29.880
I check my wallet out now or did someone steal it?

242
00:24:30.559 --> 00:24:34.440
I knew no one had stolen it, and I also

243
00:24:34.559 --> 00:24:39.720
knew that even if I had left it on the bus,

244
00:24:40.359 --> 00:24:45.279
I said, when did I last use my wallet? Or

245
00:24:45.319 --> 00:24:48.559
when did I last Huesday? Because I haven't. I have

246
00:24:48.680 --> 00:24:52.640
not even, you know, used my wallet for ages. I

247
00:24:52.680 --> 00:24:55.319
haven't needed to because I get everything online. So I

248
00:24:55.440 --> 00:25:03.440
just used my phone and all this stuff, and I thought,

249
00:25:03.440 --> 00:25:08.960
when's the last time I used my bus pass? And

250
00:25:09.039 --> 00:25:15.200
it was the first of August, So the first of

251
00:25:15.319 --> 00:25:22.559
August is the last time I left this area, and

252
00:25:22.680 --> 00:25:30.000
yesterday was the eighteenth, So seventeen days. It just goes

253
00:25:30.039 --> 00:25:37.599
to show how really I go anywhere. And it just

254
00:25:37.680 --> 00:25:44.680
seemed weird because seventeen days it's been since what's his

255
00:25:44.839 --> 00:25:53.400
name kind of left and it's like, wow, I had

256
00:25:53.400 --> 00:25:58.119
a dream last night, just remembered it. It was really weird.

257
00:25:58.240 --> 00:26:06.640
It was. It was a bit of a dodgy dream,

258
00:26:06.720 --> 00:26:13.279
actually involving some dodgy people from the past, but they

259
00:26:13.319 --> 00:26:17.720
were using my property, bearing in mind it wasn't here.

260
00:26:17.759 --> 00:26:21.039
It was in a house or something to have a

261
00:26:21.160 --> 00:26:32.880
rave party. Yeah, but there was a lady that came

262
00:26:32.920 --> 00:26:44.440
in and she liked me. And you'd think that in

263
00:26:44.480 --> 00:26:47.279
my dreams, if I met a woman, she'd like me

264
00:26:47.319 --> 00:26:50.960
because a dream. Yeah, even in my dreams, I get rejected.

265
00:26:51.000 --> 00:26:55.440
That's ridiculous. But on this occasion I didn't. She was nice,

266
00:26:56.680 --> 00:27:03.920
so there was an element of romanticness. Very weird dream,

267
00:27:04.519 --> 00:27:14.640
very strange. I can't remember what else happened, so I

268
00:27:14.720 --> 00:27:23.599
give up on the whole finding the wallet scenario. I

269
00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:32.960
go downstairs again. A taxi. Oh, as I am. So

270
00:27:33.000 --> 00:27:36.240
I'm opening my door, my front door, closing it, and

271
00:27:36.279 --> 00:27:40.319
the phone rings. It's a taxi driver. So I look

272
00:27:40.400 --> 00:27:44.960
outside to wave to him, but no, he is parked

273
00:27:45.240 --> 00:27:48.119
right in a situation where the front of the car

274
00:27:48.559 --> 00:27:52.880
is obscured by the bushes, so he couldn't see me.

275
00:27:53.759 --> 00:27:57.160
And I'm thinking, do I really need to answer the phone.

276
00:27:57.759 --> 00:28:01.119
I'm literally going to be down there in less than

277
00:28:01.160 --> 00:28:05.200
a minute. Then I'm trying to lock the door, and

278
00:28:05.240 --> 00:28:10.480
then I'm thinking, ah, but he might drive off. What

279
00:28:10.599 --> 00:28:15.000
if he drives off or you know it? Then I

280
00:28:15.000 --> 00:28:17.079
think it might be just rude if I don't answer

281
00:28:17.119 --> 00:28:20.519
the phone. So I answered the phone. He said, yes taxi.

282
00:28:21.599 --> 00:28:26.799
I said, yeah, I know. He said, how do you know?

283
00:28:28.160 --> 00:28:31.759
I said, I can see you outside. He said, well,

284
00:28:31.759 --> 00:28:36.119
why didn't you come down? I said, because I'm literally

285
00:28:36.119 --> 00:28:41.839
closing my door. I'm looking at He said, okay, but

286
00:28:41.920 --> 00:28:44.440
how did you know it's a taxi? I said, he

287
00:28:44.480 --> 00:28:50.240
says taxi on the side. He said, ah. I said, well,

288
00:28:50.279 --> 00:28:53.359
I'm coming down anyway, bye, and I just put the

289
00:28:53.359 --> 00:28:58.559
phone down. You can't say put the phone down anymore?

290
00:28:58.599 --> 00:29:03.880
Can we? Because mobile phones, you don't. I mean, technically

291
00:29:03.920 --> 00:29:06.880
we might put them down, but the action of put

292
00:29:06.920 --> 00:29:12.359
them and putting a phone down doesn't disconnect the mobile

293
00:29:12.440 --> 00:29:19.160
phone from the phone call. I feel we need to

294
00:29:19.200 --> 00:29:24.519
do that. I need to get some kind of putting

295
00:29:24.559 --> 00:29:27.680
the phone down because it has to be a Okay,

296
00:29:27.839 --> 00:29:31.440
I know it's a little bit drama ish, a little

297
00:29:31.480 --> 00:29:37.319
bit of drama, but hanging up the phone in a

298
00:29:37.359 --> 00:29:41.039
little argument on the phone, in a conversation, hanging a

299
00:29:41.119 --> 00:29:47.359
phone up could have a degree of satisfaction. At least.

300
00:29:47.400 --> 00:29:50.799
That's what my girlfriends used to tell me whenever I

301
00:29:50.839 --> 00:29:55.599
annoyed them. So what's what's the best part of our relationship?

302
00:29:56.480 --> 00:29:59.799
You know, I'd ask ex girlfriends, Oh, me, putting a

303
00:29:59.839 --> 00:30:03.440
phone down on you was the best part of our relationships.

304
00:30:03.480 --> 00:30:09.640
So the ending, oh thanks and so yeah. So I

305
00:30:10.440 --> 00:30:13.680
answered the phone and say yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm upstairs.

306
00:30:13.839 --> 00:30:16.440
He said, well, don't you come down please? I said,

307
00:30:16.480 --> 00:30:20.720
I'm coming wow, just locking my door up. So I

308
00:30:20.720 --> 00:30:26.519
go downstairs. I waved not any response there, Okay, I

309
00:30:26.640 --> 00:30:37.759
get in. He's it's from another country, which I ain't

310
00:30:37.759 --> 00:30:40.759
on no issue with Why did you mention it? Then? JG.

311
00:30:42.960 --> 00:30:46.720
I kind of fits in with the story, I think,

312
00:30:47.839 --> 00:30:51.759
so he seems to have a bit of an attitude.

313
00:30:52.519 --> 00:30:59.559
I'm annoyed because I think I've lost my wallet, but

314
00:30:59.599 --> 00:31:01.880
I do not have the time right now to deal

315
00:31:01.920 --> 00:31:05.880
with it. But at the same time, I don't want

316
00:31:05.920 --> 00:31:19.240
to cancel my debit card in case. Well, basically, you know,

317
00:31:20.079 --> 00:31:26.160
it's a hassle. I'd have to get a new I

318
00:31:26.200 --> 00:31:32.839
think it costs. I don't know how much it costs,

319
00:31:32.920 --> 00:31:40.640
but there's money to get a bus pass replacement. So

320
00:31:41.039 --> 00:31:46.559
I think it's thirty twenty quid. Thirty quid. It wouldn't

321
00:31:46.559 --> 00:31:48.519
be one hundred quid because no one would ever do it,

322
00:31:48.559 --> 00:31:56.200
so it must be like relatively small amount. As I

323
00:31:56.279 --> 00:31:59.880
get into the car, as I back in, ill financial

324
00:32:00.119 --> 00:32:02.480
this way to get in, I can't really going forward,

325
00:32:02.599 --> 00:32:07.400
can you. Unless you're little as a kid, you're going

326
00:32:07.480 --> 00:32:11.400
to jump in. Imagine imagine back in them days when

327
00:32:13.039 --> 00:32:21.200
being able to move fast, to just jump into a

328
00:32:21.319 --> 00:32:36.759
car and not be concerned about hips or knees or yeah,

329
00:32:37.039 --> 00:32:39.319
it's got weird. It must be so strange, you know.

330
00:32:39.319 --> 00:32:43.359
I remember when I was like nine ten and we'd

331
00:32:43.359 --> 00:32:46.319
be going to Wales and I'd like or maybe going

332
00:32:46.359 --> 00:32:52.240
out for the day. I jump in the car, usually

333
00:32:52.240 --> 00:33:00.599
in the back, and I'd no concern when I jumped

334
00:33:00.599 --> 00:33:03.839
in the car, thinking I'll bet be careful, like getting

335
00:33:03.799 --> 00:33:06.400
in a car. I don't want to hurt my knees

336
00:33:06.440 --> 00:33:09.319
on all my back, you know, because I would just

337
00:33:09.400 --> 00:33:13.000
mess up the rest of the day. And no, I

338
00:33:13.119 --> 00:33:18.599
was like jumping the car. I used to get Oh,

339
00:33:18.680 --> 00:33:21.720
I used to have to sit in the middle. There

340
00:33:21.759 --> 00:33:28.079
were two horrible, smelly brothers. I didn't like being in

341
00:33:28.079 --> 00:33:31.079
the middle. There was no choice. I mean they were

342
00:33:31.119 --> 00:33:36.599
both like even my two year old. My two year

343
00:33:36.680 --> 00:33:40.599
older brother was twice my size and the other one

344
00:33:40.880 --> 00:33:46.400
was it was bigger than my dad, taller anyway, so

345
00:33:47.640 --> 00:33:49.920
I think, yeah, I think my brother was pretty much

346
00:33:49.920 --> 00:33:56.640
as tall as my dad when he was twelve. Anyway,

347
00:33:58.200 --> 00:33:59.920
So I get in the car. As I back in,

348
00:34:00.960 --> 00:34:04.279
I mean, that might have been not a good It

349
00:34:04.359 --> 00:34:06.960
might not be a good introduction because basically I was

350
00:34:07.000 --> 00:34:08.559
saying load to him and all he could see was

351
00:34:08.639 --> 00:34:12.239
me bum, So that might not be a sticking my

352
00:34:12.280 --> 00:34:16.400
bum in his face probably wasn't the best introduction. Possibly,

353
00:34:18.360 --> 00:34:21.559
especially if if I was the first call that he

354
00:34:21.599 --> 00:34:24.519
had for the day, he might have just come on

355
00:34:25.480 --> 00:34:29.599
starts in the afternoon, working to the evening, and he's

356
00:34:29.599 --> 00:34:32.000
sitting there thinking, okay, well, this is the first one

357
00:34:32.000 --> 00:34:34.039
of the day. At least I've got a job. It's

358
00:34:34.559 --> 00:34:37.719
you know, it's a little bit of money, and you know,

359
00:34:38.639 --> 00:34:43.360
could be worse. At least no one's sticking and bumming

360
00:34:43.440 --> 00:34:47.960
my face. And then suddenly I walk up to him

361
00:34:47.960 --> 00:34:50.400
and he's like, I'm waving to him, and he's thinking, oh,

362
00:34:50.440 --> 00:34:54.519
are you waving to me? This is weird. I don't

363
00:34:54.559 --> 00:34:58.920
even know you. And I turn around and you know,

364
00:34:59.000 --> 00:35:03.840
like and he just sees my big massive bum blocking

365
00:35:03.880 --> 00:35:09.880
the sun, just edging towards him. I mean, all I'm

366
00:35:09.880 --> 00:35:12.039
trying to do is just sit down, you know. I'm

367
00:35:12.039 --> 00:35:17.760
not actually, I'm not trying to ruin his day. And

368
00:35:20.559 --> 00:35:24.000
it is the gadget thing where it pulls the seat back,

369
00:35:24.840 --> 00:35:29.039
so he clearly thought that I needed, you know, half

370
00:35:29.119 --> 00:35:34.519
the car just reach buttock, which was rude. It's weird, though,

371
00:35:34.519 --> 00:35:36.400
it's not really rude, is it, Because this is just

372
00:35:36.480 --> 00:35:42.239
me thinking about what you might be thinking. You're rude.

373
00:35:42.360 --> 00:35:45.920
You are why because of what you were thinking? How

374
00:35:46.000 --> 00:35:50.159
do you know what I was thinking? No one knows

375
00:35:50.199 --> 00:35:53.400
what other people are thinking. It's just all guesswork, isn't

376
00:35:53.400 --> 00:35:57.920
it anyway? I so I'm getting in. I said hello,

377
00:35:58.000 --> 00:36:05.039
he said, so we go. He said, you're going to

378
00:36:05.079 --> 00:36:08.239
the hospital and this is the journey, This is the

379
00:36:08.360 --> 00:36:12.199
very first part of the journey. And I said, yeah,

380
00:36:12.280 --> 00:36:16.119
I need you to if we can stop off at

381
00:36:16.119 --> 00:36:19.679
the pharmacy, not the hospital. BlimE me. So I used

382
00:36:19.679 --> 00:36:22.880
to say in hospital to the doctor surgery. I said,

383
00:36:22.920 --> 00:36:26.119
if we can stop off at the pharmacy first, please,

384
00:36:29.920 --> 00:36:32.239
And he said to me, so you're going to the

385
00:36:32.320 --> 00:36:39.880
doctor surgery. I said, yeah, it's like we've already had

386
00:36:39.880 --> 00:36:42.760
this conversation, so if you can please stop off at

387
00:36:42.800 --> 00:36:47.840
the pharmacy on the way, and he said nothing. I said,

388
00:36:48.199 --> 00:36:52.239
is that okay? Is that yeah? He said yeah, yeah,

389
00:36:52.320 --> 00:36:56.840
yeah yeah. So he just it's like he was ignormying me.

390
00:36:57.440 --> 00:36:59.800
But he was listening, but he just wasn't responding to

391
00:36:59.840 --> 00:37:09.400
what I was saying. And you know, I thought, well,

392
00:37:09.480 --> 00:37:15.599
this is going to be an awkward journey because I

393
00:37:15.599 --> 00:37:20.280
had a whole conversation planned. I thought I'd talk about

394
00:37:22.400 --> 00:37:25.119
the space, the moon landing. I thought this would be

395
00:37:25.159 --> 00:37:29.760
an opportunity to to have a conversation about that, but

396
00:37:29.920 --> 00:37:41.239
that didn't didn't happen, So it doesn't stop outside the pharmacy.

397
00:37:42.239 --> 00:37:50.679
He stops near the pharmacy, which meant I had to walk,

398
00:37:51.119 --> 00:37:54.679
which put my waiting distance up because he was getting

399
00:37:54.679 --> 00:38:00.119
paid to wait. I thought, why didn't you past a

400
00:38:00.119 --> 00:38:04.679
little bit closer at this At this point, I'm thinking

401
00:38:04.679 --> 00:38:09.519
to myself, we're not going to be lifelong pals. This

402
00:38:09.599 --> 00:38:17.679
relationship doesn't seem to be going very well, and possibly

403
00:38:17.800 --> 00:38:21.920
won't be seeing him again. I mean, I realized it

404
00:38:21.960 --> 00:38:25.920
wasn't a date, but still I generally get on quite

405
00:38:25.920 --> 00:38:33.679
well the taxi drivers. So he's still there when I

406
00:38:33.719 --> 00:38:35.559
get out. Of course he's still there because he's waiting

407
00:38:35.559 --> 00:38:39.199
for me to pay him. I go and get my prescription,

408
00:38:39.599 --> 00:38:46.360
just to order it. The lady in a prescription, I mean,

409
00:38:46.400 --> 00:38:51.079
she's in a pharmacy. It's a nice lady. It's almost

410
00:38:51.280 --> 00:38:55.719
I felt a little bit like i'd do. You know,

411
00:38:55.760 --> 00:39:03.559
when you're friends with someone and you know, you go

412
00:39:03.679 --> 00:39:11.400
around their house for the first time, and then you

413
00:39:11.519 --> 00:39:15.559
see them again and they're still, you know, friendly, but

414
00:39:16.920 --> 00:39:22.079
it's kind of changed. There seemed to be some unsaid

415
00:39:22.159 --> 00:39:25.400
stuff there, like they don't like there's something changed about

416
00:39:25.480 --> 00:39:30.199
the dynamics. Almost I felt, here's okay, here's how I

417
00:39:30.239 --> 00:39:36.119
felt the way that she was talking to me, because

418
00:39:36.119 --> 00:39:38.480
she's been friendly to me before, but that's when I've

419
00:39:38.519 --> 00:39:41.119
got Vinni with me. So maybe she didn't recognize me,

420
00:39:42.280 --> 00:39:49.920
and she kind of looked at me in a way

421
00:39:50.119 --> 00:39:53.599
that as if i'd visited her house for the first time.

422
00:39:54.760 --> 00:39:57.559
Asked her us a toilet, thinking I was going to

423
00:39:57.639 --> 00:40:08.400
do a wee wee, but then I walked out, sort

424
00:40:08.440 --> 00:40:11.920
of you know, going, oh, that was a lovely poo,

425
00:40:14.800 --> 00:40:21.239
and maybe that didn't she wasn't happy with that. She

426
00:40:21.519 --> 00:40:27.559
was okay for liquid but not solids in a toilet

427
00:40:27.679 --> 00:40:34.280
from visitors, and or it could have been just the

428
00:40:34.320 --> 00:40:43.280
blocked toilet I left. I don't know, yah, but yeah,

429
00:40:43.360 --> 00:40:45.800
that's kind of how what the kind of vibe I got.

430
00:40:46.559 --> 00:40:53.280
But anyway, I got my stuff, walked back to the

431
00:40:53.320 --> 00:41:01.880
taxi and got inside again, and well, you know, back

432
00:41:01.880 --> 00:41:04.639
into the taxi this time. I tried to get in

433
00:41:04.920 --> 00:41:10.639
sideways because I thought it's been true enough today already,

434
00:41:12.239 --> 00:41:16.599
you know, so I tried to get in sideways and

435
00:41:16.800 --> 00:41:19.199
I did kind of, Yeah, I managed to do it.

436
00:41:19.679 --> 00:41:22.199
Yeah I did. Yeah, it's fine, all worked out, okay,

437
00:41:23.199 --> 00:41:26.920
and we're coming back again. I mean, so far silence

438
00:41:27.000 --> 00:41:34.159
on the journey, you know. Once we yeah, it's like

439
00:41:34.239 --> 00:41:40.840
there was not a lot going on. And then right

440
00:41:44.360 --> 00:41:54.679
as we pulled up to Yeah, we're getting closer to

441
00:41:54.760 --> 00:41:58.599
the doctor's surgery. I said to the tax driver, I'll

442
00:41:58.639 --> 00:42:02.119
do as a favor, just uh, not really a favor.

443
00:42:02.159 --> 00:42:05.840
Is that I'm paying them? Not really a favor, is

444
00:42:05.880 --> 00:42:11.679
it if you're paying someone? No, a favor is not

445
00:42:11.679 --> 00:42:17.440
really not the right word. But I said, can you Yeah,

446
00:42:17.440 --> 00:42:24.360
I mean if you're having your house built and miss

447
00:42:24.679 --> 00:42:27.079
and he said, I'll do this a favor, please, miss

448
00:42:27.159 --> 00:42:37.800
the builder, missus builder, can you put the bathroom at

449
00:42:37.840 --> 00:42:41.320
the front of the house instead of the back of

450
00:42:41.320 --> 00:42:45.159
the house so more people could look through the window,

451
00:42:46.639 --> 00:42:51.920
get more traffic. It's not really a favor, is it,

452
00:42:51.920 --> 00:42:55.880
because you're paying the builders to do it? Like, well,

453
00:42:57.719 --> 00:42:59.840
I don't know. I think it's just a terminology. Is

454
00:43:00.079 --> 00:43:03.920
it's just a do us a favor? But not really

455
00:43:04.000 --> 00:43:09.239
a favor. It's anyway, so I said to a taxi driver,

456
00:43:10.440 --> 00:43:14.000
do us a favor? Power me ol mate mel Mucker,

457
00:43:16.119 --> 00:43:22.320
can you drop me off at the shopping center? There's

458
00:43:22.360 --> 00:43:25.440
this like shopping center thing place I don't know in

459
00:43:25.440 --> 00:43:31.840
the state, shopping retail outlet whatever. He said for you're

460
00:43:31.840 --> 00:43:34.800
going to a doctors, I said, I am going to doctors,

461
00:43:34.880 --> 00:43:41.000
but it's early. I got like forty five minutes to

462
00:43:41.000 --> 00:43:46.000
to mess around with. And he said, oh, and I said,

463
00:43:47.199 --> 00:43:50.639
he said, okay. He didn't seem too bothered about doing this,

464
00:43:50.760 --> 00:43:52.360
but it's like, I think it threw him off a

465
00:43:52.360 --> 00:43:56.639
little bit. I got the impression that he was determined

466
00:43:56.679 --> 00:43:59.599
to go to the doctors, and it was almost not

467
00:43:59.639 --> 00:44:03.000
looking forward to it. But he decided in his mind

468
00:44:03.760 --> 00:44:06.559
he was going to end up dropping him off of

469
00:44:06.599 --> 00:44:13.320
the doctors. And now I changed my plans. I don't know.

470
00:44:13.679 --> 00:44:21.159
It seemed mildly annoyed, but this is where it changed.

471
00:44:22.079 --> 00:44:25.760
I said to him. Yeah, the reason I ordered, I said,

472
00:44:25.760 --> 00:44:29.159
I got my appointments not till two o'clock, you see,

473
00:44:30.079 --> 00:44:32.639
and I ordered to tax it one because of traffic.

474
00:44:33.480 --> 00:44:35.199
No way, I've known what the traffic's going to be

475
00:44:35.320 --> 00:44:42.320
like straight away. He was like, yeah, the traffic's terrible,

476
00:44:43.119 --> 00:44:48.880
just like never known. We bonded, just in that last

477
00:44:49.559 --> 00:44:53.719
minute of the journey. We bonded. Now we didn't make

478
00:44:53.760 --> 00:44:59.159
a date. We didn't kiss and cuddle, We didn't swap photographs,

479
00:45:00.440 --> 00:45:03.159
you know, nothing like that. We didn't get out of

480
00:45:03.159 --> 00:45:08.079
the car and have a little dance. Nothing. It's there

481
00:45:08.119 --> 00:45:21.000
was no poetry exchange. It was it was, you know,

482
00:45:21.199 --> 00:45:27.440
it was a normal conversation, moaning about the traffic. He

483
00:45:27.639 --> 00:45:30.519
was moaning about traffic, and I know what the traffics

484
00:45:30.599 --> 00:45:37.239
like around there. You know, it's like one one thing

485
00:45:37.480 --> 00:45:47.719
and then everything's blocked. And and we bonded and a

486
00:45:47.760 --> 00:45:57.719
little bit like you know, if you remember, I met

487
00:45:57.719 --> 00:46:03.239
someone who worked in the jam jar factory, like a

488
00:46:03.360 --> 00:46:08.800
jam factory, no jar, jam jar factory, and we just

489
00:46:09.000 --> 00:46:12.119
couldn't get on with each other. He was I think

490
00:46:12.159 --> 00:46:15.679
it was my girlfriend's boyfriend. My girlfriend's boyfriend blown out

491
00:46:15.719 --> 00:46:19.360
with me. He was my sister's boyfriend. And we didn't

492
00:46:19.360 --> 00:46:22.920
get on, just didn't click. Didn't like, not get on

493
00:46:23.000 --> 00:46:28.840
in a bad way, just didn't click. And I knew

494
00:46:28.840 --> 00:46:37.199
he worked in a jam jar factory making jam jars.

495
00:46:37.679 --> 00:46:39.599
I think maybe even putting the jam in as well.

496
00:46:39.639 --> 00:46:47.559
I can't remember. It's a long time ago, and I

497
00:46:47.800 --> 00:46:51.199
was a security card at the time, I think, So

498
00:46:51.239 --> 00:46:55.880
we didn't have a lot in common. Very different jobs,

499
00:46:57.440 --> 00:47:02.280
and I was thinking, you know, it'd be nice for

500
00:47:02.320 --> 00:47:08.840
me to get on with this bloke just for the

501
00:47:08.880 --> 00:47:15.159
sake of my sister. But I couldn't find a way in.

502
00:47:15.360 --> 00:47:19.519
I was like saying, I'm saying I thought. I just

503
00:47:19.559 --> 00:47:21.559
asked him some question and see what he likes to

504
00:47:21.599 --> 00:47:27.760
talk about. I said, what do you think about the

505
00:47:27.800 --> 00:47:31.280
moon landing? Would you like? Actually I didn't say it

506
00:47:31.360 --> 00:47:33.119
like that. I just said, would you like to talk

507
00:47:33.159 --> 00:47:38.079
about the moon landing for about twelve minutes? And he

508
00:47:38.119 --> 00:47:42.159
looked at me, like, what what do you mean? I said,

509
00:47:42.360 --> 00:47:43.960
I was wondering if you'd like to talk about the

510
00:47:44.000 --> 00:47:48.920
moon landing for twelve minutes. He said, why twelve minutes?

511
00:47:50.280 --> 00:47:52.239
I said, well, we can do it for more if

512
00:47:52.280 --> 00:47:55.280
you like, But that's the most amount of time anyone's

513
00:47:55.320 --> 00:47:59.639
been able to really put up with me talking about

514
00:47:59.679 --> 00:48:04.719
the moon landing. And he said, so people don't generally

515
00:48:04.800 --> 00:48:07.880
like talking about the moon land with you, And I said,

516
00:48:07.920 --> 00:48:13.840
that's correct, not for more than twelve minutes, anyway, Some

517
00:48:13.880 --> 00:48:16.719
people are okay for the first three and a half minutes.

518
00:48:19.039 --> 00:48:21.679
And he said, why do you talk about the moon landing? Then?

519
00:48:22.840 --> 00:48:29.639
Why don't you talk about something different, and that really

520
00:48:29.679 --> 00:48:36.840
made me think. It got my mind whirling around. It's like,

521
00:48:37.079 --> 00:48:45.320
you know what, maybe, just maybe there's more than one

522
00:48:45.519 --> 00:48:54.320
conversation available, more than one topic that I can choose from.

523
00:48:54.559 --> 00:49:01.559
And this blew my mind. Maybe, just maybe I don't

524
00:49:01.559 --> 00:49:03.960
always have to be the one that picks the topic.

525
00:49:07.480 --> 00:49:12.639
It's a two way interaction. No, that's too far from me. Sorry,

526
00:49:12.119 --> 00:49:18.760
it's me talking at them. That's all I can offer. Anyway,

527
00:49:19.559 --> 00:49:25.639
I didn't know how to sort of really connect with him,

528
00:49:26.079 --> 00:49:29.360
and I wasn't that interested in connecting with him. It's

529
00:49:29.360 --> 00:49:34.519
not like, you know, i'd see him a couple of times,

530
00:49:34.599 --> 00:49:37.159
three or four times a year maybe at that time,

531
00:49:38.599 --> 00:49:40.960
and it's not like I was spending the rest of

532
00:49:40.960 --> 00:49:45.880
the time between visit seeing him, you know, trying to

533
00:49:45.880 --> 00:49:51.360
put together some kind of big mastermind plan on how

534
00:49:51.400 --> 00:49:57.079
to connect with him in some type of I don't know,

535
00:49:58.280 --> 00:50:05.519
friendly manner. I get. Yes, it wasn't that important, but

536
00:50:05.599 --> 00:50:12.079
it was it seemed useful to just, you know, maybe

537
00:50:12.119 --> 00:50:18.400
make the effort. Anyway, I ended up, I was in

538
00:50:18.440 --> 00:50:28.480
the kitchen and I'm there with my step on and

539
00:50:28.519 --> 00:50:33.480
we're just talking and she says, I do as a

540
00:50:33.480 --> 00:50:41.920
favor juicy, can you open this this jar? Because we've

541
00:50:41.960 --> 00:50:46.519
got this figure in this country where the jars was limp,

542
00:50:48.360 --> 00:50:55.079
whether it's honey, whatever, the lids are so tight it

543
00:50:55.199 --> 00:51:01.840
gives obviously. Sometimes they're just too tight. That's another thing.

544
00:51:01.920 --> 00:51:04.760
Uncle sausages. He used to get me to open his tins.

545
00:51:05.159 --> 00:51:14.599
Not his tins is jars of stuff and his drinks.

546
00:51:15.119 --> 00:51:19.239
So I think it's it kind of lost his strength.

547
00:51:19.880 --> 00:51:22.440
He couldn't do it, so he said, knock on my

548
00:51:22.480 --> 00:51:27.239
door and I do it. I quite liked it, and

549
00:51:27.320 --> 00:51:30.239
it didn't like the fact that he couldn't do it himself,

550
00:51:30.280 --> 00:51:33.800
but I quite like being useful, you know. It was

551
00:51:33.880 --> 00:51:40.440
quite nice. So whenever he got new stuff, I'd loosen

552
00:51:40.519 --> 00:51:42.360
it for him and just put it back a little

553
00:51:42.400 --> 00:51:43.960
bit so he could get in and out of it.

554
00:51:45.559 --> 00:51:46.880
Not in and out of it. I mean he didn't

555
00:51:46.880 --> 00:51:53.760
get in and out of the the jar of marmalade

556
00:51:53.960 --> 00:52:00.880
because he wouldn't fit. That'd be strange. So anyway, my

557
00:52:01.039 --> 00:52:03.280
step mummy, I just said to you, what is it,

558
00:52:03.320 --> 00:52:08.480
step mummy, and she said, can you open this jar? Please? Gecy?

559
00:52:08.800 --> 00:52:10.599
How many more times have I going to ask you?

560
00:52:12.039 --> 00:52:18.320
It's like, wow, a bit rude said, you're rude. And

561
00:52:18.320 --> 00:52:26.800
I said I can do that, but I couldn't. I said,

562
00:52:26.840 --> 00:52:30.320
so I can't do it. She said, okay, I'm sorry.

563
00:52:30.920 --> 00:52:33.119
I didn't mean to have a go at you. Can you?

564
00:52:33.480 --> 00:52:36.280
He said, no, I can't do it. He said, I

565
00:52:36.320 --> 00:52:39.760
don't be like that. I mean, I've known you since

566
00:52:39.760 --> 00:52:43.320
she was seventeen, can't you You're twenty six now, can't

567
00:52:43.320 --> 00:52:46.639
you just open that for me? I said no, No,

568
00:52:46.760 --> 00:52:49.920
What I mean is I can't physically do it. I'm

569
00:52:49.920 --> 00:52:51.840
not being awkward. I would do it for you. I

570
00:52:51.920 --> 00:52:56.440
just can't physically do it. She said, you can't even

571
00:52:56.599 --> 00:53:05.880
open the lid of a jar of marmalade. And then

572
00:53:05.960 --> 00:53:11.760
suddenly my sister's boyfriend pops up. His head pops up

573
00:53:11.760 --> 00:53:14.840
out of there. That's just weird enough. He was hiding

574
00:53:14.920 --> 00:53:18.199
in the bin. I don't know why. And he said

575
00:53:20.039 --> 00:53:24.840
I can help with that. I'm good with jars. I

576
00:53:24.960 --> 00:53:31.719
work in a jar factory. So okay, And honestly, he

577
00:53:31.840 --> 00:53:39.639
got that lid off so quickly it was like he

578
00:53:39.800 --> 00:53:45.039
just hues his thumb. Now I'm exact. Okay, that bit

579
00:53:45.079 --> 00:53:48.840
I'm made up. The rest is completely true. But he

580
00:53:48.920 --> 00:53:52.800
did get into it quite quickly. It was like a

581
00:53:52.880 --> 00:54:03.559
safe cracker for jars, a jar cracker. Yeah. But anyway,

582
00:54:03.639 --> 00:54:05.719
on the way to the taxi, well, on the way

583
00:54:05.760 --> 00:54:08.599
to this is the very last bit of the journey,

584
00:54:09.000 --> 00:54:11.119
we had to go around and round about and around

585
00:54:11.159 --> 00:54:17.320
a little lane. We had this big conversation about you know,

586
00:54:18.119 --> 00:54:20.159
well it was a very short conversation, but it was

587
00:54:20.239 --> 00:54:25.559
very animated, and I just thought it was so nice.

588
00:54:26.199 --> 00:54:28.199
It just took a little bit of time to kind

589
00:54:28.199 --> 00:54:33.000
of find a way in, you know. So I get

590
00:54:33.039 --> 00:54:37.000
out of the taxi. It's too early to go to

591
00:54:37.159 --> 00:54:42.159
the doctors. So what I do is I go into

592
00:54:45.079 --> 00:54:48.519
a close place. It's like a sports is it sports

593
00:54:48.599 --> 00:54:56.360
Direct something like that. Hannah's looking around. I need clothes.

594
00:54:56.840 --> 00:55:06.679
I need some pence. I've got seven pairs of jogging

595
00:55:07.239 --> 00:55:10.760
tracksuit bottoms that are falling apast. I need some new ones.

596
00:55:12.159 --> 00:55:15.760
The problem is, it's been such a long time since

597
00:55:15.800 --> 00:55:23.440
I've bought anything in a shop, like clothes. Apart from

598
00:55:23.480 --> 00:55:26.159
a jacket. I bought a couple of a couple of

599
00:55:26.239 --> 00:55:31.719
years ago, I bought some yeah, or three years ago,

600
00:55:33.079 --> 00:55:38.920
I bought some winter coats which was called northern is

601
00:55:38.960 --> 00:55:42.960
it Northern face or northern whatever. So I did that.

602
00:55:45.119 --> 00:55:49.960
But that's easy because I can try them on, but

603
00:55:50.079 --> 00:55:53.360
the tracksuit bottmbs, I can't really try them on. And

604
00:55:53.400 --> 00:55:57.360
I said oi. He said, who you oi in I didn't.

605
00:55:57.400 --> 00:56:00.199
I said, excuse me, sir, I just wanted to if

606
00:56:00.239 --> 00:56:05.679
you could be of assistance to MOI see, I know

607
00:56:05.840 --> 00:56:08.440
some French are just hold on to it for the

608
00:56:08.519 --> 00:56:13.960
important moments. Did I ever tell you that I had

609
00:56:13.960 --> 00:56:21.199
a friend and we went to a Spanish restaurant. This

610
00:56:21.239 --> 00:56:23.800
is at college. We all went to a Spanish restaurant

611
00:56:24.400 --> 00:56:27.559
and it had been planned for a week and she

612
00:56:27.840 --> 00:56:31.239
was looking forward to going because she was going to

613
00:56:31.280 --> 00:56:37.079
speak Spanish. She's been practicing a Spanish all week long.

614
00:56:37.519 --> 00:56:43.800
And we get there and the blankshrom Bosnia. There was

615
00:56:43.840 --> 00:56:48.199
no one Spanish in the Spanish restaurant. She was so disappointed.

616
00:56:49.320 --> 00:56:52.119
Didn't stop her from speaking Spanish to him, though he

617
00:56:52.199 --> 00:56:59.320
still didn't know what she was talking about. And so

618
00:56:59.400 --> 00:57:04.719
I go, I asked the person in the shop, just

619
00:57:05.039 --> 00:57:07.159
help me out, please. I don't know what to do.

620
00:57:07.239 --> 00:57:10.360
I don't know what one is to buy. He said, yeah,

621
00:57:10.400 --> 00:57:14.639
but you're because we're, you know, both about the same

622
00:57:14.719 --> 00:57:17.440
kind of height. He said, well, because you're not very tall,

623
00:57:18.840 --> 00:57:21.880
and I said, no, it's basically my upper body, some

624
00:57:22.639 --> 00:57:30.719
extra large upper body. But he said, you're probably medium.

625
00:57:30.760 --> 00:57:37.199
You know. For your bottoms, you know, the Trasi bottoms,

626
00:57:39.360 --> 00:57:43.840
the problem is it's the length. They have elastics on

627
00:57:43.880 --> 00:57:50.599
the waist, so that's not really an issue. The length is,

628
00:57:52.840 --> 00:57:57.239
you know, but we if they're loose at the bottom,

629
00:57:57.320 --> 00:57:59.960
they can drag on the floor, but these ones aren't.

630
00:58:00.159 --> 00:58:04.559
They've got elasstick at the bottom, so it wouldn't make

631
00:58:04.599 --> 00:58:08.840
any difference. So I got two pairs, both in the

632
00:58:08.880 --> 00:58:15.320
special offer. One was black, one was gray or whitey gray.

633
00:58:16.559 --> 00:58:24.639
And then I go up pay for it, and I

634
00:58:24.679 --> 00:58:27.519
get do you know when someone looks at you and

635
00:58:27.559 --> 00:58:32.760
you think, oh, I'm not sure why they're looking at

636
00:58:32.800 --> 00:58:36.519
me like that. It was a nice way, not horrible way,

637
00:58:36.559 --> 00:58:38.119
and I'm not used to that. And I was like,

638
00:58:39.760 --> 00:58:49.119
she was looking at me, and even at the end

639
00:58:49.119 --> 00:58:51.280
of it, when we finished, she was still looking at

640
00:58:51.280 --> 00:58:55.639
me like, I don't know, I just I can't explain it.

641
00:58:55.639 --> 00:59:04.400
It's very very uh, I don't know, I don't know.

642
00:59:06.480 --> 00:59:09.760
And I was thinking, did you think I was being grumpy?

643
00:59:10.480 --> 00:59:16.719
Because you know, I'm quite softly spoken, and I don't

644
00:59:16.960 --> 00:59:25.159
always have a huge amount of inflection in my voice

645
00:59:25.679 --> 00:59:32.519
sometimes when I talk, and I don't know, maybe that's

646
00:59:32.519 --> 00:59:37.199
what was going on that I'm really not sure. So

647
00:59:37.239 --> 00:59:40.480
I made my way to doctors. At this point, I'm hungry.

648
00:59:42.800 --> 00:59:44.760
You might think, oh, why are you telling me that.

649
00:59:46.079 --> 00:59:50.719
I'm telling you that because I was hungry. Yeah, it's

650
00:59:50.760 --> 00:59:55.199
just this is part of the story and as part

651
00:59:55.199 --> 00:59:58.639
of the story afterwards as well as part of now,

652
00:59:58.679 --> 01:00:07.800
because I'm hungry now. Yes, yes, yes, So I went

653
01:00:08.119 --> 01:00:14.599
to the doctors, get there me eight minutes to the

654
01:00:14.719 --> 01:00:20.760
machine that locked you in wasn't working, so I went

655
01:00:20.800 --> 01:00:24.840
to the counter. They logged me in, you know, for

656
01:00:25.039 --> 01:00:32.239
my nurse appointment. It's twenty past two before I get

657
01:00:32.320 --> 01:00:40.840
called by the nurse and I'm thinking, I don't know

658
01:00:40.840 --> 01:00:44.599
why it took so long. Why is you know? But

659
01:00:44.639 --> 01:00:48.280
the lady was lovely. She was lovely and she didn't

660
01:00:48.360 --> 01:00:54.320
rush me, which is pretty much why my appointment was late.

661
01:00:55.119 --> 01:00:58.920
My appointment was late because she gave time to the

662
01:00:58.960 --> 01:01:03.320
previous person and a person after me. Their appointment was

663
01:01:03.400 --> 01:01:09.159
late because the nurse gave time to me to talk.

664
01:01:10.679 --> 01:01:18.320
So it was hard to really be too grumpy about

665
01:01:20.000 --> 01:01:28.920
being and waiting around for twenty five minutes, but that

666
01:01:29.079 --> 01:01:34.280
seemed to go quite well. I had a blood test,

667
01:01:34.599 --> 01:01:43.000
had well weight done, pulse read blood pressure, so my

668
01:01:43.400 --> 01:01:48.519
blood pressure and my pulse were good. My weight was

669
01:01:48.599 --> 01:01:55.320
less than last time, marginally, but I'm about eighteen nine

670
01:01:55.480 --> 01:02:01.360
kilos now, roughly about eighty nine kilos or eighty eight

671
01:02:01.360 --> 01:02:09.079
and a half kilos instead of being one hundred kilos,

672
01:02:09.079 --> 01:02:12.360
which I was just a year and a half ago.

673
01:02:14.400 --> 01:02:17.239
But last time i'd lost I think I lost about

674
01:02:17.519 --> 01:02:29.960
one maybe two kilos since last year. So I left

675
01:02:30.400 --> 01:02:37.840
and that was all done. I left. I went into Sainsbury's.

676
01:02:37.920 --> 01:02:45.400
I walked around Sainsbury's because I was hungry. I first

677
01:02:45.480 --> 01:02:50.599
started walking around to the other estate, the other you know,

678
01:02:50.840 --> 01:02:54.679
groceries section, but the road was so busier for and

679
01:02:54.719 --> 01:02:56.880
I'm not going to get across here, So I walked

680
01:02:56.880 --> 01:03:00.440
back to Sainsbury's, went up the escalator to the restaurant.

681
01:03:01.559 --> 01:03:10.559
The restaurant's now closed, no restaurant anymore gone. So I'm

682
01:03:10.599 --> 01:03:19.159
thinking I'm hungry. I need to eat some food, so

683
01:03:19.199 --> 01:03:26.880
I go searching in Sainsbury's for something to eat, something

684
01:03:26.920 --> 01:03:29.880
I can just stuff in my mouth. So I ended

685
01:03:29.960 --> 01:03:38.480
up getting like a sausage roll pasty thing and a

686
01:03:38.519 --> 01:03:42.400
few cakes, so also I pay for them. I'm in

687
01:03:42.480 --> 01:03:46.440
a queue behind people with trolleys because I don't want

688
01:03:46.480 --> 01:03:55.440
to use a self service, and I do get a

689
01:03:55.480 --> 01:04:00.400
funny few looks. Funny few looks, a few funny looks. Mhm,

690
01:04:01.159 --> 01:04:03.400
wise he why is he waiting here? He's got his

691
01:04:03.639 --> 01:04:09.519
like five five objects and he's in between two people

692
01:04:09.599 --> 01:04:16.559
with trolley's full of stuff. I don't care. I just

693
01:04:16.760 --> 01:04:23.119
I don't like the self services, simple as that. Never

694
01:04:23.199 --> 01:04:37.880
have done. Really, yeah, what else happened? So I come out?

695
01:04:38.199 --> 01:04:44.639
Oh yeah. When I was insane, prie this, a female

696
01:04:44.960 --> 01:04:51.880
walked up to me. My fund's moving on its sound

697
01:04:51.960 --> 01:05:03.280
how weird. So when I was in Sainsbury's and I'm

698
01:05:03.320 --> 01:05:06.920
just wandering around looking for the something to eat because

699
01:05:06.920 --> 01:05:10.199
I didn't really know what I always wear or what,

700
01:05:11.320 --> 01:05:13.920
so I haven't been in there for a long time.

701
01:05:16.639 --> 01:05:20.320
This female walks up to me. She says hello. I

702
01:05:20.320 --> 01:05:24.559
said hello. I thought she was going to try and

703
01:05:26.119 --> 01:05:30.599
sell me something, you know, kind of I don't know,

704
01:05:33.079 --> 01:05:37.559
or get me to sample a bit of cheese something

705
01:05:37.599 --> 01:05:44.480
like that, and she said oh. I said, oh, Okay, Hello,

706
01:05:45.400 --> 01:05:50.320
she said hi. I said hi. She said, hold, I'm

707
01:05:50.480 --> 01:05:52.760
stopping you and I'm thinking, every go is what we're

708
01:05:52.840 --> 01:05:54.760
going to do. She said, I just want to let

709
01:05:54.800 --> 01:05:58.880
you know I like your shirt. I said, well, what

710
01:06:00.440 --> 01:06:04.239
she said, I like your shirt? I said, thank you,

711
01:06:04.400 --> 01:06:09.920
I said. She said it's very colorful. I said thanks.

712
01:06:10.800 --> 01:06:13.440
I said I like your shirt as well, shared a

713
01:06:13.519 --> 01:06:17.960
sort of not the same shirt as me, but just

714
01:06:18.039 --> 01:06:22.880
for yeah, and then she walked away and I was

715
01:06:23.039 --> 01:06:26.280
just like, I don't know what. I really don't know

716
01:06:26.280 --> 01:06:29.800
what that conversation was about, but it was nice. I

717
01:06:29.800 --> 01:06:33.039
don't know if I've ever in my entire life had

718
01:06:33.079 --> 01:06:35.400
someone walk up to me in public and tell me

719
01:06:35.440 --> 01:06:39.800
that they liked an item of my clothing. Honestly, it

720
01:06:40.039 --> 01:06:43.559
never happened ever, So that was a very that was

721
01:06:43.599 --> 01:06:55.599
a first for me. And then yeah, I saw a

722
01:06:55.599 --> 01:07:00.320
few things as I was walking through the supermarket, and

723
01:07:05.559 --> 01:07:08.679
I'm waiting when I get out of there, so I

724
01:07:08.719 --> 01:07:10.679
have to eat, have something to eat. So I'm really

725
01:07:10.760 --> 01:07:14.079
getting hungry at this point, so I sit down outside

726
01:07:14.119 --> 01:07:20.800
the supermarket, has something to eat, and then I go

727
01:07:20.840 --> 01:07:26.920
and wait for the bus. Yeah, I mean it was

728
01:07:27.719 --> 01:07:31.360
they said it was core pasted, put the call past

729
01:07:31.400 --> 01:07:42.559
four before the bus got there. When I get home, Yeah,

730
01:07:42.559 --> 01:07:44.280
and I've already I kind of already told you about

731
01:07:44.320 --> 01:07:47.360
last night. I just got a bit tired. I went

732
01:07:47.400 --> 01:07:52.719
to bed, and when I do get up again and

733
01:07:52.800 --> 01:07:56.239
set some breakfast cereal, watched a bit of TV and

734
01:07:56.639 --> 01:08:05.880
just went back to bed. So you know, I got

735
01:08:05.920 --> 01:08:09.920
a fair bit done technically. You know. I made a recording,

736
01:08:10.519 --> 01:08:16.520
went to the doctor's, got myself a couple of pairs

737
01:08:16.560 --> 01:08:27.720
of track ees tracksuit bonds. Yeah, I can't think of

738
01:08:27.760 --> 01:08:32.000
anything else that I did. It's not a huge amount, really,

739
01:08:32.079 --> 01:08:38.720
is there when you think about it. But yeah, I'm okay.

740
01:08:42.880 --> 01:08:45.479
There's still a lot more than my normal money do.

741
01:08:48.239 --> 01:08:51.800
But right now I'm going to have my breakfast because

742
01:08:52.359 --> 01:08:56.920
my tummy tells me it's time to have my ready

743
01:08:57.000 --> 01:09:07.000
break Really. Oh yeah, I wish i'd made this rhyme

744
01:09:10.319 --> 01:09:15.039
partly rhymed. So I'm going to go. I do. I

745
01:09:15.079 --> 01:09:22.680
haven't done Monday's bording objects I completely forgot whoops. But

746
01:09:22.720 --> 01:09:28.159
I do intend to do Tuesday's trivia trivia Tuesday today,

747
01:09:29.319 --> 01:09:33.640
And I've already got a subject because someone posted me

748
01:09:33.680 --> 01:09:37.119
a subject I think, or sent me a form on

749
01:09:37.159 --> 01:09:42.920
my website, so I'll do that later today. I might

750
01:09:42.960 --> 01:09:45.880
also do it Monday's bording objects as well for yesterday,

751
01:09:46.359 --> 01:09:50.840
just a belated one. I genuinely forgot to do it.

752
01:09:50.920 --> 01:09:54.880
I forgot it was Monday. I was focused this, focusing

753
01:09:54.960 --> 01:09:58.159
it in, focusing so much on going to the doctor's

754
01:09:58.199 --> 01:10:04.840
surgery that i'd had gone what day it was. So

755
01:10:04.880 --> 01:10:11.920
that's me for now. Anyway, today to do today, So

756
01:10:12.279 --> 01:10:17.079
thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself

757
01:10:17.199 --> 01:10:22.000
because you do deserve to be happy and be gentle

758
01:10:22.039 --> 01:10:42.640
of yourself. You deserve to feel safe. Lots of love, Bye,