June 2, 2025

(no music) Buddhism | Monday’s Boring Objects | LMBYTS #1363 | 2nd June 2025

(no music) Buddhism | Monday’s Boring Objects | LMBYTS #1363 | 2nd June 2025
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Hello, Hello, Welcome to Jasonnewland dot com. My name's Jason

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Newland and this is let Me Buoy You to Sleep.

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Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

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And this is Monday's boring Objects. Did I hope you're well?

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I actually started this recording to do a kind of

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a relaxation recording, and I realized that it's just not

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quite enough to do that. Here. Too much noise, too

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much background noise. Vinnie's like cleaning himself and it's weird.

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So yeah, I'm gonna do this instead because he is

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a part of the let Me boy You to Sleep

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or to let Me Boil Your Pain away recordings. And

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those that listen regularly know who Vinny is. You know

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that he's a little Jack Russell, little red Jack Russell

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who likes to be involved. He's kind of like my

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co host in a weird way. Very weird way, really,

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isn't it. So I've ordered some shopping and it's apparently

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it's on its way. It should be here in about

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twenty minutes. And then I've got a meeting a friend

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for coffee at this afternoon. So that's the first time

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i'll've been out anywhere in public since wow, December. Yeah,

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first time I've been out anywhere since December, because that

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was when I went saw my dad at the pub

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just before Christmas. I mean, I go to the park

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and I have been to the pet shop probably since then.

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I'm into the garage a couple of times, but I

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don't like going to the garage anymore. I have been

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to the pharmacy probably a couple of times in that time.

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I mean last month I didn't go, but all the

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other months I did. This month I didn't go, but

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I got a neighbor that I asked a neighbor to

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go and collect it for me, and they did, which

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is groovy. So probably January, February, March, January, February, March,

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I got them. You know, I probably had to go

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and collect themselves. Maybe not January, but definitely February. Much

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But I haven't been in a public place, you know,

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sitting down with humans around me. So it's going to

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be a bit strange, but it's okay. It's it's a

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very old friend, someone I've known for a long time.

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I'm think, you know, I'm going to talk about Buddhism

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because it's a Buddhist friend I'm meeting, and I don't

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I don't want to really focus on him as the

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boring object. And also I don't think. I don't think

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that anything I talk about is boring. It's just, yeah,

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that's the thing. I hope people don't think that if

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I was going to talk about let's say, train spotting

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or a subject that's some people would be absolutely engrossed

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and fascinating with. You absolutely love that I'm mocking it

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and corn it boring because I'm not. I mean, look

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at some of the subjects that I've covered in my

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Boring Objects. I say, look, I don't know what I

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had myself. I'm gonna have to go and look. I

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go and look, look, look, look, look, look look where

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is it? Okay, sleepy boring objects? Monday's sleepy Boring Objects.

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So I've now done. I've done a lot. There's a

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lot of a lot of episodes. But and when I

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first started doing them, I did the first song was rain. Okay,

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that's not something I particularly find interesting. Hair, that's the

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number one I don't particularly find interesting. Bricks, so you know, printers, cameras, plugs.

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So I was talking about really random just objects and

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then swimming pools, ovens, hitch hiking. Books. Now, there's nothing

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boring about books to me. So that was something that

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I've had a big interest in over the years. And

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once I actually get my eyes tested and get some

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proper glasses, I will be getting back into reading the

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books once in my eyes. Work microphones, that's not a

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boring subject. Well, mops now that probably is. So yeah,

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I don't know how manage you talk about mops for

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thirty five minutes. Wallpaper, I mean, that is the epiphany

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of boring. This isn't it really wallpaper or a painted wall? Train, spotters, games,

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beds at jobs, baths now the jobs only lasted thirty

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eight minutes fifty nine seconds when that was the eighteenth

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of October twenty twenty one. So yeah, I started doing

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these sleepy boarding objects on the ninth of August twenty

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twenty one, so I've been doing it for a while now.

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I yeah, I could have made that jobs one last

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for about ten hours. Really, I got baths, wooden benches. Belgium. Again,

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I loved Belgium. I got It's like I don't have

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an issue with Belgium. I really really loved Belgium. When

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I went there. Brilliant place, great especially it's it. Whatever

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I say now is going to probably come across as wrong,

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and it's just I like the fact that it's flat

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like this. I'm not a big I'm not a lover

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of hills, really, I'm not. I'd like to be able

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to just walk and you can see ahead of yourself, can't.

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You can see what's about you can wherever you go,

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So basically, whenever you leave your house, no matter where

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you go, how far away you go, you can always

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see your house. It's great and tea bags cheese. Yes,

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I've done quite a few. The last one I did

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was dog walking, and I'm pretty sure that was super

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super exciting for everyone. Oh God, I'm trying to manipulate, manipulate,

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maneuver the laptop, but it keeps missing schools. I did

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that the week before Monday's Boring Objects, but I didn't

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even talk. I didn't even give it a subject. And

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the one before that, I didn't give it a subject.

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That's weird. I don't know what that is about. Strange.

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And then I did Willy Wonka that was the twenty

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first of April, then another one before that I didn't

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give it a subject. That's kind of the point of

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the thing, isn't it said? Why am I not giving

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them subjects? Doc job? That's the one they first of

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March this year, twenty twenty five homes cleaning jobs, New

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Year's Eve, Monday's boring objects. So I did a recording

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on New Year's Eve last year and an hour and

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forty minutes. So maybe I was actually talking about New

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Year's Eves that I had spent over the years. And

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then the Monday before that it was Christmas. Well, it

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was probably Christmas Eve, wasn't it New Year's ego? Christmas Eve?

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So I talked about Christmas for one hour and eighteen minutes,

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blind me. Then before that I talked about friends, hair styles,

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before that, counseling degree, girlfriend's girlfriends, and girl they dare

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your girlfriend? Ooh? Girlfriends lasted two hours and seven minutes.

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What the ex about? Online IQ tes tests two hours

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and fourteen minutes? So I actually did an online I

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did online IQ tests. Wow, I kind of vaguely remember that.

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That was in October last year. So today what did

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I say I was going to talk about? I can't remember.

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I have a not deliveries. Oh, Buddhism. So I'm going

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to talk I'm going to talk about Buddhism. I'm not

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going to talk about Buddhism itself. I'm not going to

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go into details, you know, about what Buddhism is and stuff.

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But I'm going to talk about my experiences with Buddhism

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from from an early age and then onwards. So just

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let you know. I do have a Facebook group called

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Jason Newland's Boring Group. The link is on my website.

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I also have a YouTube channel at Jason Newland. I'm

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just going to go back to doing I tried to

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make some videos the last few days and it takes

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so long and my head looks my face looks like

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a tomato. I'm not Yeah, I'm just going to go

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back to doing audios. It's much more relaxed for me.

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I'm just talking to the microphone. I can look at

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the computer screen if I want to, I can close

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my eyes, I can just chill out and yeah, this

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suits me better, better, and what else. So yeah, that's it.

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I'll probably just continue go back to uploading on YouTube.

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My six versions that are recording, you know, without music

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and then with music five and ten hours. Yeah, today's

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second of June two thousand and twenty five. I got

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my Universal Credit an email from them telling me to

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check some stuff and I didn't understand it. I genuinely

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didn't understand it. And then then I've got a letter

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through today, so apparently on my new style employment and

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support allowance on your interview on and there's a little gap,

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but you you had an interview, so they did call

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me last week with us to agree what you need

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to do to get new style essay. This is known

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as your claimant commitment. You agreed your claimant commitment on

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a twenty eighth of May two twenty five, which was Thursday, Wednesday, Wednesday,

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last Wednesday. What happens next? We're right to tell you

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if you can get newest new style of essay and

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this so how much you will get. So at this

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point I don't even know I'm getting if I'm getting it,

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I don't know when they're going to tell me. And

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then this is this is absolutely it's kind of it's funny,

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but it's not funny because it's very confusing. I've got

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a letter about another one about my employment and support allowance,

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your contribution based employment and support allowance will change the

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new style employment LA and we will book an appointment.

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So I get this. They sent this in a twenty

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fifth Bearing in mind it's so they sent this on well,

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it's dated the twenty fifth, which would be the Sunday

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before last, so it will have been sent out earliest

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on a Monday. So it's literally taken Yes, it's taken

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a whole week to get here, so I'm not sure

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how that works. And now I've got a letter from

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the rent for the council ari rent reminder. It appears

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you have not received your rent. We have not received

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your rent payment on time, and you now owe one

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hundred and sixty eight pound ninety if you have paid

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within the last few days. Thank you. Please disregard this letter.

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And it's given me like a list of things that

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will happen over pay payment overdue that leads to legal action,

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core proceedings then eviction a little bit heavy handed. I mean,

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my rents ten years. My rent's always been paid and

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the only reason it's not being paid yet is because

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the benefits have changed over they just so does that

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mean I owe one hundred and sixty eight pound ninety?

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I don't know this is confusing me. I really think,

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you know, if you owe one hundred and sixty eight

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pound ninety, the word legal actions, core proceedings and evictions

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shouldn't not be on that letter. This is just a

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really it's weird. I'm not I'm not a big fan

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of that. If you I have in paid difficulty paying

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you rent, please contact us. If you normally pay your

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rent with housing benefit or have made a claim for

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Universal Credit, then it may have been suspended or stopped. Wow.

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The thing is, these letters are just generic, aren't they.

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No one's actually like thinking all that Jason I want

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to get him now and typing it out. It's just

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I guess if you go, I mean one hundred and

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sixty eight pound ninety. The rents one hundred and what

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four pounds a week, so that's not even two weeks

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rent and they're sending a letter out, so I don't know,

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very strange, it's very very unusual behavior. I personally think,

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should I talk about a rent? I can't even remember

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that A lot of the rents I've paid over the

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years that might be more interesting or or less interesting,

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more boring. I just viny just said, oh, you're all

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over the place. Why are you making so much noise?

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You've already ruined one recording today, viny, Why don't try

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and ruin this one as well. I'm doing it all

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on my own. He said, that's so rude. Stop being

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so rude. Don't flap your ears at me. You've got

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such an attitude now as you're getting older. Yes, you have.

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You're getting an attitude. You need to calm yourself down. No,

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don't look away, you look at me. You need to

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calm He's so cute. He's wiggling his tail. It's both

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his ears are up and he's turning his head. He's

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so damn cute, And if you are. I finally found

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some food that he likes, that he really likes, and

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everyone was called. I'll tell you though, it's like a

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whole food. Where is it? I got it from Amazon.

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I've got it. I bought it on Amazon. It's not,

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you know, an Amazon mute food? Where is it? Okay?

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He really likes it. And I've gone through probably ten

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different types of food trying to find him something that

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he would almost, I don't want to say, get excited

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to eat, but it seems sometimes he just reluctantly eats

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what I give him. It's like, okay, or eat it

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if he's hungry, But he doesn't seem to be particularly

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you know, excited. Let's have a look past three months. Oh,

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I got some Yeah, because I also got some soap,

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and some toothpaste, tough paste, and some deodorant. Sketches shoes

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on the thirteen for me that my other shoes are

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falling apart, right, so I get these sketches. Men's go

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Max Athletic. The idea of me buying anything with the

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name athletic in it is kind of funny to me.

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But they're supposed to be good for sort of slipping on.

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And the weird problem is, and they're supposed to be

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ten size ten, they're too loose. They're not too loose.

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00:19:35.039 --> 00:19:38.279
They're not falling off me when I walk, but they're

233
00:19:38.279 --> 00:19:44.200
not I definitely couldn't run in them. Again, That's kind

234
00:19:44.240 --> 00:19:46.680
of tiggles me a little bit because it was I've

235
00:19:46.720 --> 00:19:49.319
just had the little visual of me trying to run.

236
00:19:49.680 --> 00:19:52.480
I'm not going to be running in them. But that's

237
00:19:52.599 --> 00:19:56.880
not the point is I took Vinnie around the field

238
00:19:56.920 --> 00:20:00.400
the other day, around the actual field fields and ended

239
00:20:00.480 --> 00:20:02.400
up with a blister on the back of my foot.

240
00:20:04.400 --> 00:20:11.960
This is this is wearing socks. So how much did

241
00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:16.240
it cost? Fifty pounds fifty sixpence it's supposed to be tenpence,

242
00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:22.319
size ten, and I desperately needed because the other ones.

243
00:20:23.200 --> 00:20:28.240
When I broke my foot, probably ah, BlimE me two

244
00:20:28.359 --> 00:20:39.200
years ago, two years, maybe a year, a year and

245
00:20:39.279 --> 00:20:45.400
a half. I can't it's a while, and I couldn't

246
00:20:45.400 --> 00:20:47.880
put socks on. Maybe it was when I break my toe.

247
00:20:47.920 --> 00:20:50.680
I can't remember, but I couldn't put socks on because

248
00:20:51.160 --> 00:20:54.480
my foot. It must have been my toe. Oh is

249
00:20:54.519 --> 00:20:57.559
it when I kicked the wall when I was asleep.

250
00:20:58.440 --> 00:21:00.319
I think I kicked the wall. Yeah, so I broke

251
00:21:00.400 --> 00:21:05.720
my toe, my big toe. And it wasn't on purpose,

252
00:21:05.759 --> 00:21:09.960
by the way, So I was hobbling around for a while.

253
00:21:10.240 --> 00:21:12.599
I couldn't put my socks on. That was just a

254
00:21:13.119 --> 00:21:16.400
just no, it's a no no. So but luckily the

255
00:21:16.519 --> 00:21:21.680
shoes I had were comfortable enough, the former sketches ones.

256
00:21:21.759 --> 00:21:27.200
I had to not need shoo to not need socks,

257
00:21:27.799 --> 00:21:29.960
and I went through about a year where I didn't

258
00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:34.839
wear socks at all. Some would say that's gross, but

259
00:21:35.039 --> 00:21:38.880
it's it's not the worst thing I've done, so it's

260
00:21:39.359 --> 00:21:42.119
it probably maybe it is, maybe it is groom. I

261
00:21:42.119 --> 00:21:44.599
don't know, but I got I went through the whole

262
00:21:44.599 --> 00:21:48.359
winter about wearing socks. I was outside, didn't need socks,

263
00:21:48.960 --> 00:21:51.680
just got used to it, and there was a degree

264
00:21:51.720 --> 00:22:00.319
of freedom I quite liked. I enjoyed that, I know,

265
00:22:00.519 --> 00:22:05.240
just a little bit of it was relaxing. It was

266
00:22:06.319 --> 00:22:13.880
I didn't feel so restricted. But then the shoes that

267
00:22:13.920 --> 00:22:20.799
I had started falling apart internally and also at the bottom.

268
00:22:21.079 --> 00:22:24.079
They're just worn out, basically because I do I suppose

269
00:22:24.079 --> 00:22:26.519
I do quite a bit of walking through the week,

270
00:22:26.839 --> 00:22:31.480
taking him out and stuff. So I could no longer

271
00:22:31.960 --> 00:22:35.640
where I could no longer have them without socks. So

272
00:22:35.720 --> 00:22:40.440
I started wearing socks. But then they just became really

273
00:22:40.519 --> 00:22:45.599
uncomfortable because there's just it's like stick things sticking into

274
00:22:45.640 --> 00:22:48.319
my foot. So that's why I had to better go

275
00:22:48.359 --> 00:22:53.240
and buy some new shoes. And I did think maybe

276
00:22:53.240 --> 00:22:55.599
I could go back to not wearing any socks again,

277
00:22:58.480 --> 00:23:00.400
but it turns out I'm going to need to two

278
00:23:00.400 --> 00:23:03.039
pairs of socks really if I want them to fit tight,

279
00:23:03.160 --> 00:23:09.680
no nicely. If I was going to walk around the

280
00:23:09.720 --> 00:23:14.880
field like I did before, I probably need two pairs

281
00:23:14.880 --> 00:23:18.559
of socks. But the question is why it is only

282
00:23:18.680 --> 00:23:23.279
my right heel blister but my left heel didn't. I mean,

283
00:23:23.319 --> 00:23:27.240
I wasn't hopping. I'd used both feet, So why did

284
00:23:27.279 --> 00:23:33.720
only one blister and the other one did not. That

285
00:23:33.880 --> 00:23:38.880
just seems a bit strange. So, okay, we're talking about

286
00:23:38.920 --> 00:23:42.960
dog food. Dog food. I just had my delivery, by

287
00:23:43.000 --> 00:23:46.720
the way, I just I had a few, a few.

288
00:23:47.640 --> 00:23:49.720
I think that's why I'm kind of losing track of

289
00:23:49.759 --> 00:23:52.559
where I am with this recording a little bit, because

290
00:23:52.559 --> 00:23:57.119
I've had a few interruptions from Vinnie from the door,

291
00:23:57.200 --> 00:24:01.839
going from the door going to once is when the

292
00:24:01.839 --> 00:24:07.119
post got delivered and Vinnie went absolutely rah rah rah.

293
00:24:07.720 --> 00:24:10.720
And then I got my delivery and Vinie went rah

294
00:24:10.799 --> 00:24:15.480
rah rah rah rah. And earlier we had someone in

295
00:24:15.480 --> 00:24:27.680
the garden talking a loudness or volume that's unnecessary. Really,

296
00:24:28.079 --> 00:24:32.079
I think she did, did he or she? When they

297
00:24:32.119 --> 00:24:33.599
talk on their phone and have their phone and a

298
00:24:33.599 --> 00:24:37.839
loud speaker and they walk to the next road, so

299
00:24:37.880 --> 00:24:41.160
I think what they do they leave their phone like

300
00:24:42.160 --> 00:24:43.920
the other side of the road or something, and then

301
00:24:43.920 --> 00:24:47.119
come back into the garden and talk. That's what it

302
00:24:47.160 --> 00:24:55.359
sounds like so loud. Lily's Kitchen Natural adult dog Food.

303
00:24:57.480 --> 00:25:06.880
Now it was blah, six pound fifty six and it

304
00:25:07.039 --> 00:25:14.200
was six tins one hundred and fifty grams each. I

305
00:25:14.319 --> 00:25:19.200
give him half a tin per meal, basically because he

306
00:25:19.240 --> 00:25:22.960
had treats and he eats the dry food and stuff

307
00:25:23.000 --> 00:25:27.119
in between. So I did give him the whole packet.

308
00:25:27.160 --> 00:25:30.519
I give him the whole tin, and he couldn't eat all.

309
00:25:30.599 --> 00:25:33.160
It's too much, so I'm just give him half at

310
00:25:33.160 --> 00:25:37.359
a time. He loves it. I don't have to coax

311
00:25:37.440 --> 00:25:40.559
him to eat it, which I did before with the

312
00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:45.359
other stuff, and I really have I mean, you might think, oh,

313
00:25:45.559 --> 00:25:52.759
wait a minute, it was a one time purchase. So

314
00:25:52.839 --> 00:26:01.359
I paid seven pound twenty nine. Really seven pounded? Does

315
00:26:01.359 --> 00:26:07.400
it tell me how much I paid delivered twenty eighth

316
00:26:07.400 --> 00:26:12.160
of may buy it again? Okay, let's have a look.

317
00:26:12.960 --> 00:26:15.839
Buy again. Seven pound twenty nine. Yeah, that's how much

318
00:26:15.880 --> 00:26:20.079
I paid for six So I'm going to have another

319
00:26:20.160 --> 00:26:24.880
look to see what other what other foods visit the store.

320
00:26:25.319 --> 00:26:35.000
Lily's Kitchen calling all daring dogs shop dog food. Okay,

321
00:26:35.000 --> 00:26:38.240
that's what we want. I'm not I'm not happy now

322
00:26:38.240 --> 00:26:42.119
because they also serve they help. I don't want to

323
00:26:42.119 --> 00:26:44.519
buy food that also makes food cat for cats. It

324
00:26:44.720 --> 00:26:52.839
just it just feels feels unfair for any shop dry food. No, well,

325
00:26:52.960 --> 00:26:55.839
I suppose a good shop wear food. Let's have a

326
00:26:55.880 --> 00:26:58.599
look see what different ones they've got. So they've got

327
00:26:58.599 --> 00:27:03.039
ones in big ten which I don't want. Classic dinners,

328
00:27:03.240 --> 00:27:11.440
that's the ones I got. Uh, Classic dinners multipack six

329
00:27:11.519 --> 00:27:18.759
times one point fifty gram all I can also by them.

330
00:27:19.000 --> 00:27:24.160
What's this thirteen pound forty nine thirteen amiens in that one?

331
00:27:24.200 --> 00:27:32.640
Then thirty is cottage pie pack of ten. It's oh,

332
00:27:33.000 --> 00:27:37.759
it's not thirteen pounds, it's twelve pounds fourteen, So it's

333
00:27:37.759 --> 00:27:42.599
a different it's a discount, but that's the same, the

334
00:27:42.720 --> 00:27:46.759
same one. I'd like the idea of maybe me, you know,

335
00:27:47.319 --> 00:27:53.480
having options, having different ones. I don't want to just

336
00:27:53.480 --> 00:27:56.960
get him like ten of the same, although there's quite

337
00:27:57.000 --> 00:28:01.039
a few different ones that they do. They've got's have

338
00:28:01.079 --> 00:28:12.039
a look beef goulash, cottage pie, lean machine whatever that

339
00:28:12.160 --> 00:28:21.119
is great British breakfast Sunday lunch, chicken and turkey, casse

340
00:28:21.240 --> 00:28:33.200
role lamb, hot pot lamb tag in to guinea fishy pie,

341
00:28:34.079 --> 00:28:39.519
fishy fish pie, fishy fish pie as opposed to what

342
00:28:39.640 --> 00:28:47.200
kind of other fish pie, coronation chicken. Okay, so that's

343
00:28:47.200 --> 00:28:49.160
all the ones I do. It's still good. Oh no,

344
00:28:49.200 --> 00:28:56.559
it's more beef supper, lamb supper, chicken supper, and you've

345
00:28:56.559 --> 00:29:01.319
got organic as well. So I don't know how many

346
00:29:01.440 --> 00:29:08.759
is in that one? One, two, three, four? Is it

347
00:29:08.880 --> 00:29:14.359
four for fourteen pound? That seems a little bit. Oh no,

348
00:29:14.440 --> 00:29:19.759
it's back of ten fourteen pound pack of ten. Okay,

349
00:29:19.799 --> 00:29:23.279
so I'll go back. So there's quite a few. Let's

350
00:29:23.279 --> 00:29:26.799
have a look at some of these other ones. This

351
00:29:26.839 --> 00:29:32.000
is the pack of pack of one Lily's Kitchen six

352
00:29:32.200 --> 00:29:40.640
six Weekend Favorites. Okay, so that's seven pound A note

353
00:29:40.880 --> 00:29:47.920
it is eight pound forty nine. But there's cheaper ways

354
00:29:47.960 --> 00:29:52.920
of getting it lowest price other sellers seven pound seventy

355
00:29:52.960 --> 00:29:57.799
five plus three delivery. So why is it costing more

356
00:29:58.319 --> 00:30:03.640
than the actual place that makes the stuff? That don't

357
00:30:03.680 --> 00:30:07.079
make so much sense. Where are they getting it from?

358
00:30:07.359 --> 00:30:10.079
Or they buying it in bulk and then dividing it

359
00:30:10.119 --> 00:30:14.079
into smaller packs, or you know, I knew what I

360
00:30:14.119 --> 00:30:20.920
meant when I said what I said. I could put

361
00:30:20.920 --> 00:30:23.680
it down on my Amazon list. If anyone's interested in

362
00:30:25.920 --> 00:30:32.400
buying Viny some food, let me know if you are,

363
00:30:32.440 --> 00:30:37.640
because honestly I have tried. Is what I bought him

364
00:30:37.640 --> 00:30:41.279
so far. Win a lot meaty chunks, Win a lot

365
00:30:41.319 --> 00:30:51.279
of Sunday Dinners, Caesar's Country Stew Adult and Lily's Kitchen,

366
00:30:51.319 --> 00:30:58.880
so that's recent. The other one's pedigree Charm adult wet food.

367
00:31:00.960 --> 00:31:08.839
Several of or other ones have I got him? Oh

368
00:31:08.880 --> 00:31:11.039
some of it might actually have been from Sainsbury who

369
00:31:11.039 --> 00:31:15.359
won't be on here. But he's had lots of different

370
00:31:15.400 --> 00:31:23.160
old number pedigree chum different one Sultana cake and then

371
00:31:23.240 --> 00:31:27.160
that was for me. I do like a bit of cake.

372
00:31:28.119 --> 00:31:31.759
Hard to believe, but I do. I do like to

373
00:31:31.920 --> 00:31:40.400
kick Oh Morrison's Chocolate Claires. I ordered that at some

374
00:31:40.480 --> 00:31:46.480
point in the past. I haven't ordered anything from Amazon,

375
00:31:46.880 --> 00:31:51.319
like the shopping groceries for ages. I use Uber eats

376
00:31:51.400 --> 00:31:55.960
now because Amazon kept not delivering the stuff that I ordered,

377
00:31:56.759 --> 00:32:00.839
so they used Morrison's and had a few examples when

378
00:32:00.839 --> 00:32:06.319
they just didn't. The stuff wasn't in the bag. You

379
00:32:06.680 --> 00:32:10.599
get refund and stuff, but I just didn't. That wasn't

380
00:32:10.680 --> 00:32:15.039
quite what I was looking for. You know what I

381
00:32:15.039 --> 00:32:28.240
mean sketches Men's Go Max delivered Tuesday ten for June

382
00:32:28.440 --> 00:32:30.160
our three delivery Tooes. I was going to say I

383
00:32:30.160 --> 00:32:32.720
didn't buy it in tent for June. I need a

384
00:32:32.759 --> 00:32:38.960
second of June. Now. I did buy some FM London

385
00:32:40.839 --> 00:32:44.759
one two, three, four five eight pack. There was an

386
00:32:44.799 --> 00:32:50.160
eight pack of boxes or underwear and they were too small,

387
00:32:51.440 --> 00:32:54.359
just too They weren't too small, but they were just

388
00:32:54.519 --> 00:33:02.279
too tight. So I can't really wear them. I can

389
00:33:02.319 --> 00:33:04.440
wear them, but they're just a bit too tight, you know,

390
00:33:04.519 --> 00:33:13.200
a bit too Oh, look at this, just looking at something.

391
00:33:13.319 --> 00:33:16.920
I've bought. Most of the stuff I've bought on Amazon,

392
00:33:17.000 --> 00:33:21.119
it's just been food. Just looking at other dog food.

393
00:33:21.119 --> 00:33:25.920
It must be I'll wag a complete dog food. So

394
00:33:26.000 --> 00:33:33.160
I've bought oh yeah, James well beloved adult dog food.

395
00:33:34.160 --> 00:33:42.880
And according to this, I bought socks. But I don't

396
00:33:42.880 --> 00:33:46.119
know where any of them are now. I'm not sure

397
00:33:46.119 --> 00:33:50.000
how many of those have been eaten by Vinnie. Possibly

398
00:33:50.039 --> 00:33:55.119
a few, possibly, I mean genuinely, possibly a few have

399
00:33:55.119 --> 00:33:59.599
been eaten by him or hidden. He might have a

400
00:33:59.640 --> 00:34:03.400
stash somewhere. I don't know where he would have them.

401
00:34:03.440 --> 00:34:12.880
Oh wow, I there's a muzzle that I got for LOGI,

402
00:34:14.320 --> 00:34:18.360
so that's quite a while back. In it it doesn't

403
00:34:18.400 --> 00:34:27.400
say what date it was, man, right, I can't find

404
00:34:27.440 --> 00:34:31.679
any others. So, yeah, what was I talking about? What

405
00:34:31.760 --> 00:34:37.159
was etire can a boot? This is gonna be one

406
00:34:37.159 --> 00:34:40.599
of those recordings where I don't actually get to the point,

407
00:34:41.480 --> 00:34:44.239
and as we all know, that doesn't happen very often.

408
00:34:46.039 --> 00:34:58.400
Maybe should we stick with a Buddhist So my first

409
00:34:58.800 --> 00:35:02.119
interest in Buddhism, I would say, probably came when I

410
00:35:02.159 --> 00:35:09.719
watched Kung Fu on TV, Kung Fu show Good Our Supper,

411
00:35:10.000 --> 00:35:14.760
I don't know if you remember, and there was one

412
00:35:15.079 --> 00:35:21.880
scene where he was locked in a I don't know

413
00:35:21.880 --> 00:35:30.079
what it was called, like a a heated little shed thing,

414
00:35:30.519 --> 00:35:33.360
you know, like a coal bunker thing, and he was

415
00:35:33.400 --> 00:35:38.840
locked in there overnight or for two days or three days,

416
00:35:38.840 --> 00:35:43.679
and he when they opened the door, expecting him to

417
00:35:43.760 --> 00:35:51.000
be in a not very good space, he was calmly, meditating, smiling,

418
00:35:54.039 --> 00:35:59.199
if I if I remember correctly, They were so annoyed

419
00:35:59.280 --> 00:36:03.360
that they closed door again, but that might just be added,

420
00:36:03.679 --> 00:36:08.199
and might just added that myself. And that's when I

421
00:36:08.199 --> 00:36:14.480
started thinking and like, oh, because I've been I've been

422
00:36:14.480 --> 00:36:16.719
in a situation where I was locked in cupboards and

423
00:36:16.760 --> 00:36:22.079
locked in places, and like, I didn't know how to

424
00:36:22.119 --> 00:36:25.440
deal with it. And I thought, oh, there is a

425
00:36:25.480 --> 00:36:27.360
way of dealing with that kind of stuff where you,

426
00:36:27.360 --> 00:36:32.400
you know, to calm yourself down. I didn't really understand

427
00:36:32.559 --> 00:36:38.079
because I was like eight nine years old, but I

428
00:36:38.239 --> 00:36:41.079
liked it. I liked it a lot, I did. I

429
00:36:41.159 --> 00:36:50.199
liked it, and I thought, hmm, And then I remember

430
00:36:50.199 --> 00:36:54.480
seeing Incredible Hulk and he also used to try and work,

431
00:36:54.559 --> 00:36:58.519
what you know, find ways to calm himself down so

432
00:36:58.559 --> 00:37:00.840
that he didn't get angry because you wouldn't like him

433
00:37:00.840 --> 00:37:04.000
when he got angry. And this was the TV show

434
00:37:04.039 --> 00:37:07.039
from the seventies and I guess early eighties as well.

435
00:37:10.440 --> 00:37:13.159
And again I was kind of like, okay, because I

436
00:37:13.239 --> 00:37:17.920
had a few anger stuff issues. I guess back then

437
00:37:18.320 --> 00:37:25.079
I would explode. So I could see this similarity between

438
00:37:25.079 --> 00:37:29.360
me and the Incredible Hulk, except I just turned red

439
00:37:29.800 --> 00:37:33.760
and stayed the same size other than that, and didn't

440
00:37:33.760 --> 00:37:40.599
get any stronger, but just screamed like a benchie. So

441
00:37:41.199 --> 00:37:48.880
I kind of like that seed was sown the idea

442
00:37:49.000 --> 00:37:53.440
of finding a way to calm down my mind or

443
00:37:53.519 --> 00:37:59.400
calm down me, and I was I guess I was

444
00:37:59.400 --> 00:38:02.599
a little bit a stress head when I was a kid,

445
00:38:02.639 --> 00:38:08.599
and I didn't even know why I wasn't. I didn't

446
00:38:08.679 --> 00:38:13.039
understand why I was how I was. And I remember

447
00:38:13.079 --> 00:38:16.559
one particular time I went home from school and was

448
00:38:16.599 --> 00:38:18.800
still living in the house where myna and the grand

449
00:38:18.840 --> 00:38:20.760
had moved in, so I would have been about nine

450
00:38:21.079 --> 00:38:24.320
eight or nine. I went into kitchen and I and

451
00:38:24.400 --> 00:38:28.360
my stepmom said, well, are you all right? I said, yeah, fine.

452
00:38:28.400 --> 00:38:30.320
He said, come on, you don't know. And I started

453
00:38:30.360 --> 00:38:34.039
crying and I'm sort of just uncontrollably crying, and I

454
00:38:34.079 --> 00:38:37.760
didn't know why, and it was I just remember that,

455
00:38:38.599 --> 00:38:40.679
and it happened a few times. It still happens as

456
00:38:40.679 --> 00:38:45.039
an adult sometimes, but it was really just like built

457
00:38:45.159 --> 00:38:49.239
up and I didn't really I had no way of

458
00:38:49.360 --> 00:38:52.239
dealing with it. I guess I had no where dealing

459
00:38:52.320 --> 00:38:56.000
what happened in the past. I didn't understand it. None

460
00:38:56.039 --> 00:39:04.239
of it really made sense bucket see the benefit of

461
00:39:04.599 --> 00:39:10.559
some kind of I knew it was meditation. So I

462
00:39:10.599 --> 00:39:13.280
don't know how I knew it was meditation. Maybe someone

463
00:39:13.360 --> 00:39:18.000
told me that was that Kung Fu was doing in

464
00:39:18.039 --> 00:39:22.199
that like dungeony room thing that he was locked in

465
00:39:22.800 --> 00:39:29.320
like a hot room or something. But yeah, those seeds

466
00:39:29.320 --> 00:39:32.639
were planted of like, maybe there is a way to

467
00:39:35.360 --> 00:39:44.920
calm myself. And then I when my dad was ill,

468
00:39:45.039 --> 00:39:47.800
he had to have a serious operation when I was

469
00:39:47.800 --> 00:39:57.360
about twelve, i'd say, maybe eleven. So at that time

470
00:39:57.440 --> 00:40:00.400
I turned to the New Testament. It kind of con decided.

471
00:40:00.440 --> 00:40:04.920
When the Gideon Society came around the school, and probably

472
00:40:05.000 --> 00:40:07.039
right at the beginning of the first year of high school,

473
00:40:07.039 --> 00:40:11.480
they handed these Gideon Bibles. I've got one on the shelf.

474
00:40:11.519 --> 00:40:15.360
Actually it's not the same one, but it's it is

475
00:40:15.400 --> 00:40:18.400
the same one. It's a red Gideon's Bible, and that

476
00:40:18.480 --> 00:40:22.639
they produced probably millions over the years, hundreds of millions probably,

477
00:40:25.320 --> 00:40:28.639
and I read it. I spent all my time reading it,

478
00:40:28.679 --> 00:40:38.000
really and there was a degree of meditation that came

479
00:40:38.039 --> 00:40:45.840
from that for me, by letting go and not clinging

480
00:40:45.880 --> 00:40:52.920
onto stuff and not not getting angry with people. But

481
00:40:52.960 --> 00:40:54.800
at the same time, I was letting people get away

482
00:40:54.800 --> 00:40:58.239
with stuff that I would not normally have done at

483
00:40:58.280 --> 00:41:00.719
school and that so, you know, it didn't last long,

484
00:41:02.880 --> 00:41:06.159
but it lasted till my dad had his operation and

485
00:41:06.400 --> 00:41:12.599
was better. So then I went back to my old ways,

486
00:41:13.960 --> 00:41:16.679
and then when I was then I started doing karate

487
00:41:20.079 --> 00:41:26.639
and there was a degree of self control involved in that.

488
00:41:26.679 --> 00:41:32.519
There was definitely, I would say, a degree of controlled

489
00:41:32.519 --> 00:41:37.599
in the anger because it's it's a very It's a discipline,

490
00:41:37.639 --> 00:41:41.280
isn't it. Like all sports, it's a discipline. So I

491
00:41:41.320 --> 00:41:44.639
was starting to learn a bit of discipline. I'd already

492
00:41:44.679 --> 00:41:46.559
been in the cecre det, so I'd had to learn

493
00:41:46.599 --> 00:41:49.760
that kind of discipline as well being shouted at and

494
00:41:49.800 --> 00:42:06.400
not reacting, which yeah, wasn't easy. But they're on a

495
00:42:06.400 --> 00:42:14.880
a religious education trip school trip to London, visiting a

496
00:42:14.920 --> 00:42:20.880
few different religious places. So we went to a church

497
00:42:21.320 --> 00:42:30.360
I think we went to is was it what are

498
00:42:30.360 --> 00:42:37.079
they called, a Muslim place, a Jewish place, Catholic place,

499
00:42:37.400 --> 00:42:42.559
and a Buddhist place. We might have even gone to

500
00:42:42.599 --> 00:42:45.360
a Sekh place. So we went to quite a few

501
00:42:45.400 --> 00:42:49.480
different places and didn't spend a huge amount of time there,

502
00:42:49.519 --> 00:42:53.159
but because there was nothing there. There was just like

503
00:42:53.239 --> 00:42:56.360
empty buildings really, so we kind of had to look around.

504
00:42:56.599 --> 00:42:58.920
But when we got to the Buddhist center in London,

505
00:42:59.480 --> 00:43:04.719
there was people there and we all sat around and

506
00:43:04.760 --> 00:43:08.440
they answered questions. Because we didn't have that with any

507
00:43:08.480 --> 00:43:13.280
of the other places that we visited, so you know,

508
00:43:13.400 --> 00:43:16.960
it was probably a bit more enjoyable because there was interaction.

509
00:43:18.119 --> 00:43:20.519
And then they did they answered questions, and I kept

510
00:43:20.519 --> 00:43:24.840
asking questions about karate because they did karate there as well,

511
00:43:26.000 --> 00:43:28.639
so that kind of I think I annoyed everyone else

512
00:43:28.679 --> 00:43:32.039
in the in the group. And then I was also

513
00:43:32.119 --> 00:43:35.960
the first time I ever had a McDonald's milkshake. Oh

514
00:43:36.000 --> 00:43:41.440
my goodness, that was phenomenal. So two really lovely experiences

515
00:43:41.440 --> 00:43:46.000
in one day. So what they did at the London

516
00:43:46.039 --> 00:43:52.039
Buddist Center, which is in bethnal Green, I think we

517
00:43:53.880 --> 00:43:58.639
did some meditation that probably lasted ten minutes, maybe fifteen minutes,

518
00:44:00.519 --> 00:44:04.920
and we all sat on mats. They had bells and

519
00:44:06.480 --> 00:44:12.159
incest was burning and it was like, really, I liked

520
00:44:12.199 --> 00:44:17.599
it a lot, I mean really really liked it. In fact,

521
00:44:17.719 --> 00:44:21.480
I think if if I'd have been closer, if there'd

522
00:44:21.559 --> 00:44:26.320
been one in my town, I possibly would have gone.

523
00:44:27.280 --> 00:44:28.800
I mean I might not have been allowed to go,

524
00:44:28.840 --> 00:44:32.119
but I would have probably asked to go and maybe

525
00:44:32.159 --> 00:44:35.519
sneaked in just for the meditation because I needed it.

526
00:44:35.679 --> 00:44:43.800
I so needed it a way to calm my mind.

527
00:44:44.679 --> 00:44:46.840
Makes you must I'm starting to think, why don't I

528
00:44:46.880 --> 00:44:53.280
go I should go back Hey. So that was that

529
00:44:53.440 --> 00:45:00.639
experience and then I left school the next year and

530
00:45:00.719 --> 00:45:04.760
I didn't do anything other than just try and survive really,

531
00:45:05.079 --> 00:45:08.599
so I gave up the karate. I didn't had no

532
00:45:08.760 --> 00:45:15.599
interests really, and then it was probably nineteen eighty nine

533
00:45:16.159 --> 00:45:22.280
I decided I became very interested in comedy. I started

534
00:45:22.280 --> 00:45:28.320
to write a journal. And then nineteen ninety, after living

535
00:45:28.320 --> 00:45:31.119
in London for a while, I came back to the

536
00:45:31.159 --> 00:45:36.920
town I was used to living and I decided to

537
00:45:36.960 --> 00:45:41.679
become a comedian, a stand up So I planned and

538
00:45:41.719 --> 00:45:43.679
I was going to move back to London the next year,

539
00:45:43.679 --> 00:45:48.519
and I did so I went back to London ninety one,

540
00:45:48.800 --> 00:45:55.960
and then probably about ninety two, maybe ninety three, but

541
00:45:56.000 --> 00:46:00.119
I'd say probably about ninety two, I started getting in

542
00:46:00.119 --> 00:46:07.039
trusted in Beat generation books like the Dama Bumbs, the

543
00:46:09.920 --> 00:46:12.360
I don't know, there's so many different ones, wasn't there

544
00:46:12.800 --> 00:46:17.159
on the Road and the Dama Bums both by Carriac

545
00:46:17.599 --> 00:46:25.920
Karaoke Jack Carroac and then Alan Ginsburg and Cassidy or whatever,

546
00:46:26.159 --> 00:46:32.199
lots of different ones. And as I have a tendency

547
00:46:32.280 --> 00:46:35.440
to do in my life, I collected every single book

548
00:46:35.519 --> 00:46:40.480
I could on the subject, every single Beat book, every

549
00:46:40.559 --> 00:46:44.519
poetry book and everything. I'm not saying I had all

550
00:46:44.519 --> 00:46:46.800
those books, but I collected all the ones I could

551
00:46:46.960 --> 00:46:50.639
afford to get. And I did that for put in the

552
00:46:50.599 --> 00:46:53.559
next three years up to one the next couple of

553
00:46:53.639 --> 00:46:59.519
years to two thousand and four, nineteen ninety four. Sorry,

554
00:46:59.559 --> 00:47:03.719
not too for nineteen ninety four. So I got very

555
00:47:03.800 --> 00:47:08.280
much into after that, though, I got into Buddhism. Well,

556
00:47:08.320 --> 00:47:15.119
actually probably more Taoism to start with, because the Beat

557
00:47:15.159 --> 00:47:18.480
generation a lot of what they're talking about was very Buddhist,

558
00:47:19.239 --> 00:47:23.880
very Dooist or Taoist, however you want to pronounce it.

559
00:47:24.320 --> 00:47:29.119
And that interested me. So I kind of from there

560
00:47:29.400 --> 00:47:34.920
got back into interested in Buddhism, interested in I mean,

561
00:47:34.960 --> 00:47:37.199
I remember I used to go to school, go to school,

562
00:47:37.239 --> 00:47:42.280
go to work, and I would be reading books like

563
00:47:42.400 --> 00:47:48.320
Confucious books or Zen books about Zen maybe the cones

564
00:47:48.519 --> 00:47:53.519
or not like ice cream cones but or is it

565
00:47:53.599 --> 00:47:59.719
co Aen's. And I'd have these I think the right

566
00:47:59.719 --> 00:48:03.719
word pithy, you know, like there a book of sayings,

567
00:48:03.760 --> 00:48:08.320
and I'd read those in my breaks at work. So

568
00:48:08.360 --> 00:48:12.880
I got very involved in Buddhism, but only in the

569
00:48:12.920 --> 00:48:22.519
sense of reading the books. And then two thousand and

570
00:48:23.199 --> 00:48:27.280
five or two thousand, yeah, between yeah, so between that

571
00:48:27.360 --> 00:48:37.639
time and two thousand and five September August, No, when

572
00:48:37.760 --> 00:48:45.000
was it, probably bl I'm in November, maybe two nineteen

573
00:48:45.079 --> 00:48:47.800
ninety five, I keep it's so long ago, I can't

574
00:48:48.239 --> 00:48:52.639
it's like nineteen ninety five. That was like that was

575
00:48:52.679 --> 00:48:59.480
a different century. So nineteen ninety five, I I sold

576
00:48:59.519 --> 00:49:05.559
all my book books or my Buddhist books. And I

577
00:49:05.639 --> 00:49:10.119
had a good collection, a large collection, but I sold

578
00:49:10.159 --> 00:49:16.719
them all and because I was basically being evicted and

579
00:49:16.760 --> 00:49:19.920
I needed somewhere, I needed some cash, and then I

580
00:49:19.920 --> 00:49:22.639
went and worked at Butlin's. So you know, it didn't

581
00:49:22.960 --> 00:49:31.320
really work out. It worked out in the end. I

582
00:49:31.400 --> 00:49:35.599
love that little collection and I had, Yeah, I had

583
00:49:35.599 --> 00:49:39.679
a good collection of books back then, probably a good

584
00:49:39.679 --> 00:49:50.000
couple of hundred books. Yeah, and then nothing, honestly up

585
00:49:50.039 --> 00:49:54.840
from ninety five then ninety six. I did read buy

586
00:49:55.000 --> 00:50:01.760
another book, which was it was a Buddhist book, the Tibetan.

587
00:50:04.400 --> 00:50:07.320
I've still it's not the same one, but it's the

588
00:50:07.360 --> 00:50:09.840
same one. So I basically had that book three times

589
00:50:09.880 --> 00:50:14.480
now and it's on my bookcase. It's sort of red cover.

590
00:50:14.760 --> 00:50:20.000
I figet something path of good Fortune to make me

591
00:50:20.039 --> 00:50:24.000
want to read it again. Strange, isn't it? So I

592
00:50:24.079 --> 00:50:26.159
bought that and I was reading that when I was

593
00:50:26.239 --> 00:50:33.119
doing a security job during ninety six ninety seven, and

594
00:50:33.199 --> 00:50:40.199
I think I also got I also had see this

595
00:50:40.280 --> 00:50:46.840
is weird. I've had this book. It is Teachings of

596
00:50:46.880 --> 00:50:57.440
the Buddha, and I've had it since probably nineteen ninety three.

597
00:50:57.679 --> 00:51:05.800
I still got it. So I can't get it. What

598
00:51:06.000 --> 00:51:25.079
is that book name? Where is oh? Is that? Still

599
00:51:25.159 --> 00:51:43.679
can't find that book much. It's obstacles everywhere. I came

600
00:51:43.800 --> 00:51:49.719
back the cover and there's like a I guess it's

601
00:51:49.719 --> 00:51:52.920
a dust cover or whatever. It is very worn now.

602
00:51:53.519 --> 00:52:01.599
But it's called the Teachings of Buddha and it's one size.

603
00:52:01.639 --> 00:52:08.159
English to other side is I don't know Chinese, Mandarin.

604
00:52:08.280 --> 00:52:11.360
I'm not sure what the what the language is. It

605
00:52:11.400 --> 00:52:17.199
might be Japanese, actually, I'm not sure. Teach instead of Buddha.

606
00:52:17.239 --> 00:52:26.000
What year was this printed? Oh, it's Japan Yes, so

607
00:52:26.039 --> 00:52:31.400
it's Japanese. So it's English and Japanese. Nineteen sixty six

608
00:52:31.440 --> 00:52:38.280
it was printed, and then again the revised edition Wow,

609
00:52:38.639 --> 00:52:47.400
seven hundred and third revised edition, seven hundred and three

610
00:52:47.840 --> 00:52:51.760
revisions of this nineteen ninety one. This was so this,

611
00:52:52.000 --> 00:52:54.559
this was from nineteen ninety one, so I probably got

612
00:52:54.559 --> 00:53:00.760
it in about ninety two. It's the only item that

613
00:53:00.840 --> 00:53:04.800
I have from that long ago. And then do you

614
00:53:04.880 --> 00:53:09.800
know how much it cost me? Twenty five pound still

615
00:53:09.840 --> 00:53:13.159
got the price tag on it on the inside. Twenty

616
00:53:13.159 --> 00:53:21.679
five pound. When you consider at the time my rent

617
00:53:21.760 --> 00:53:25.920
was forty pounds a week. I was earning one hundred

618
00:53:25.960 --> 00:53:29.960
pounds a week in my job, so I spent twenty

619
00:53:30.000 --> 00:53:36.079
five pounds on a book, which kind of shows how

620
00:53:36.119 --> 00:53:43.840
interesting I was in the subject because so it's English

621
00:53:43.840 --> 00:53:47.960
and Japanese and there is how many pages, over six

622
00:53:48.039 --> 00:53:51.719
hundred pages. But it's not a big book. It's you know,

623
00:53:52.440 --> 00:53:59.960
quite small. The writing is quite small. So yeah, it's good,

624
00:54:00.039 --> 00:54:02.480
but it's very in a way. It's kind of similar

625
00:54:02.519 --> 00:54:06.639
to the Gideon's Bible in the sense of you can

626
00:54:06.760 --> 00:54:12.440
look up things to to focus on. So for example,

627
00:54:14.760 --> 00:54:22.400
if you're interested in I sudly I should be at

628
00:54:22.400 --> 00:54:30.000
the back. Actually, yes, at the back like a glossary. No,

629
00:54:30.119 --> 00:54:36.239
it isn't hmmm, it's not at all. There is a

630
00:54:36.400 --> 00:54:44.000
there's a also, okay, so there is like it's an index.

631
00:54:45.360 --> 00:54:47.039
So if you want to look at truth where you

632
00:54:47.079 --> 00:54:55.159
want to, okay, do not forget where you are seeking.

633
00:55:01.199 --> 00:55:06.360
Do not let your mind be disturbed, even under unsatisfactory circumstances.

634
00:55:07.199 --> 00:55:09.079
So there's little things like that you can go into

635
00:55:09.199 --> 00:55:15.800
and say, Okay, it can help in a few you know,

636
00:55:17.280 --> 00:55:21.400
I suppose stuff when it's getting when things are maybe

637
00:55:21.440 --> 00:55:26.360
a little bit difficult. The meaning of life, a prejudice life,

638
00:55:28.039 --> 00:55:31.599
and the five things that no one can accomplish in

639
00:55:31.599 --> 00:55:38.719
this world, the four truths in this world is faith

640
00:55:38.800 --> 00:55:44.280
is a manifest manifestation, manifestation. I can't even say the word,

641
00:55:44.559 --> 00:55:46.519
but anyway, that the reason I'm getting that out is

642
00:55:46.559 --> 00:55:51.880
because I just I forgot. I don't think I've got

643
00:55:51.880 --> 00:55:55.679
that book, but I forget that that book predates every

644
00:55:55.760 --> 00:56:01.639
other item or belonging that I have in world. I

645
00:56:01.760 --> 00:56:06.719
have nothing that's older in that book. I mean, even

646
00:56:06.880 --> 00:56:12.119
my internal organs have regenerated in that time, because they'd say,

647
00:56:12.239 --> 00:56:14.960
is it every seven years? Our organs regenerate over time,

648
00:56:15.079 --> 00:56:22.079
So that book's older than me. Technically it was born

649
00:56:22.119 --> 00:56:25.840
when I was twenty one. That book, so in this

650
00:56:25.920 --> 00:56:29.119
sense is like my son or my daughter, that book

651
00:56:29.199 --> 00:56:34.880
is and it's the only thing. Even when I was

652
00:56:35.039 --> 00:56:42.679
destroying books back in two thy fourteen, I wouldn't go

653
00:56:42.719 --> 00:56:50.039
near that one. I mean, it's not that it's irreplaceable,

654
00:56:50.039 --> 00:56:54.840
because it's probably probably now on it's nine thousandth edition

655
00:56:56.159 --> 00:57:04.079
reprint or whatever, but it's yeah, it's traveled with me.

656
00:57:04.320 --> 00:57:10.079
You think about it, it's traveled for so it was

657
00:57:10.159 --> 00:57:12.800
in Stratford and it's traveled with me all the different

658
00:57:12.840 --> 00:57:17.920
places I've moved, So let's count those. So from Stratford

659
00:57:18.480 --> 00:57:24.920
ninety four to another place in light and so that's one,

660
00:57:25.159 --> 00:57:31.280
then again stayed with me there, then to Ireland, then

661
00:57:31.400 --> 00:57:35.440
back to London. So that's four places. Just been to Ireland,

662
00:57:36.239 --> 00:57:42.480
it's been, then to Bogner, Regis, then back to London,

663
00:57:44.639 --> 00:57:48.400
then to another place in London, another place in London,

664
00:57:51.639 --> 00:57:59.639
then another place in London, then Ipswich, another place in

665
00:57:59.719 --> 00:58:04.519
it's which number place in Nipswich, nomber place in Ipswich,

666
00:58:05.880 --> 00:58:13.920
number place in Nipswich. So it's fourteen. So far. Then

667
00:58:14.119 --> 00:58:19.400
where I'm living now that's fifteen. No, where I moved,

668
00:58:19.559 --> 00:58:31.440
so he's rather then six sixteen seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, nineteen

669
00:58:31.559 --> 00:58:35.840
or twenty, so about nineteen or twenty different places I've

670
00:58:35.880 --> 00:58:40.800
lived since I got this book. I think it's more

671
00:58:40.880 --> 00:58:43.280
than that I've moved, probably more than that. I'm just

672
00:58:43.320 --> 00:58:47.360
the old yeah, twenty one, twenty two, Yeah, maybe twenty three,

673
00:58:48.039 --> 00:58:51.000
twenty two, between twenty one and twenty three. Times I've

674
00:58:51.039 --> 00:58:54.480
moved since I've got this book. So it's moved around

675
00:58:54.480 --> 00:58:57.840
with me. Now, how I thought about it, I would

676
00:58:57.920 --> 00:59:01.280
have took it with me to well, when I went

677
00:59:01.280 --> 00:59:03.599
to Amsterdam or when I went to the Isle of Man,

678
00:59:03.760 --> 00:59:10.559
or when I went to Bulgaria, or when I went

679
00:59:10.599 --> 00:59:13.199
to Thailand or whatever. I could have sort of taken

680
00:59:13.199 --> 00:59:17.679
it with me. Is my travel my travel companion. But

681
00:59:17.719 --> 00:59:21.599
I didn't didn't think about it. I got you know,

682
00:59:21.599 --> 00:59:25.880
I like to travel light, not in physical weight, but

683
00:59:26.039 --> 00:59:33.159
just generally light. So yeah, so that I've got that book.

684
00:59:33.199 --> 00:59:39.039
So that's that's been with me the whole time. I

685
00:59:39.039 --> 00:59:42.039
I generally, I don't really look at it. It's terrist

686
00:59:42.440 --> 00:59:44.440
I should have got that other book, shouldn't I The

687
00:59:44.480 --> 00:59:48.199
other book that I've got, Path of great Fortune, Noble

688
00:59:48.280 --> 00:59:58.280
Path of great Fortune or something it's called. So what

689
00:59:58.440 --> 01:00:03.519
year am I up to on this? So yeah, I

690
01:00:03.519 --> 01:00:07.199
think when I got involved in about two thousand, nineteen

691
01:00:07.320 --> 01:00:10.760
ninety seven, blind me, I keep saying two thousand nineteen

692
01:00:10.920 --> 01:00:20.199
ninety seven, I started getting into self development, and before

693
01:00:20.239 --> 01:00:23.199
that I was it's going to be strange because I

694
01:00:23.239 --> 01:00:29.000
never really did any sales in the nineties. I tried

695
01:00:29.039 --> 01:00:33.519
a few different sales jobs and failed every single one

696
01:00:33.519 --> 01:00:38.840
of them. And because they were always not always but

697
01:00:38.880 --> 01:00:46.760
one wasn't, but most of them were, you know, bonus

698
01:00:46.800 --> 01:00:54.039
only no actual pay unless you sell. I couldn't keep

699
01:00:54.079 --> 01:00:56.760
it up because I always I had a tendency of

700
01:00:56.840 --> 01:01:01.920
starting those jobs. They're not hard to get because there's

701
01:01:01.960 --> 01:01:04.440
nothing for the people to lose. Is that really? The

702
01:01:04.480 --> 01:01:06.599
companies that take you on they don't pay you anything,

703
01:01:07.440 --> 01:01:10.440
and they give you a commission, so they'd have to

704
01:01:10.480 --> 01:01:13.039
pay you a commission. If you make money, it's a

705
01:01:13.079 --> 01:01:19.239
win win for them. So I didn't get you know,

706
01:01:19.719 --> 01:01:21.760
but I was interested in selling, and I had lots

707
01:01:21.760 --> 01:01:24.440
of selling books, lots of sales books, and I used

708
01:01:24.480 --> 01:01:28.440
to read those books for fun in the ninety five,

709
01:01:28.599 --> 01:01:34.760
ninety six, ninety seven, ninety eight, ninety nine. It's weird,

710
01:01:34.800 --> 01:01:39.360
I just in fact, earlier than that. I started reading

711
01:01:39.440 --> 01:01:45.679
sales books in nineteen eighty nine when I was doing canvassing,

712
01:01:46.679 --> 01:01:51.000
and I just liked the positivity of it. Anything that

713
01:01:51.039 --> 01:01:53.199
could help me to feel a little bit more positive

714
01:01:53.559 --> 01:01:58.480
was a good thing. But I did go after rails

715
01:01:58.519 --> 01:02:06.960
a bit during the nineties, and then I started doing

716
01:02:07.079 --> 01:02:13.039
sales in two thousand and one as a job, like

717
01:02:13.320 --> 01:02:20.079
full time properly, so you know, I kind of began

718
01:02:20.199 --> 01:02:24.159
reading books again on sales and listening to audio tapes

719
01:02:24.199 --> 01:02:33.519
by zig Ziggler and people like that. I kind of, yeah,

720
01:02:33.599 --> 01:02:37.280
I'd lost contact with the Budhis, the Buddhism stuff. I

721
01:02:37.320 --> 01:02:40.679
didn't have anything to do with that, although I didn't

722
01:02:40.719 --> 01:02:42.960
have my little book here, but I didn't look at it.

723
01:02:44.280 --> 01:02:48.719
And then probably about November two thousand and two or

724
01:02:48.920 --> 01:02:51.840
the end of two thousand and two, I was in

725
01:02:53.679 --> 01:03:02.400
much need to for help as far as relaxing, as

726
01:03:02.440 --> 01:03:08.400
far as anxiety control and stuff like that. So what

727
01:03:08.559 --> 01:03:13.440
happened is I used to walk past this place every day,

728
01:03:14.320 --> 01:03:17.719
a Buddhist center. No, it was at a Buddhist shop,

729
01:03:17.800 --> 01:03:21.400
and then I realized there was a Buddhist center, and

730
01:03:21.440 --> 01:03:24.000
then I kind of started thinking about going in there.

731
01:03:24.119 --> 01:03:26.599
And I knew it was open, and I think a

732
01:03:26.719 --> 01:03:32.400
Wednesday or Tuesday evening, and I don't know. It kind

733
01:03:32.400 --> 01:03:35.000
of pulled me in a little bit. So I was

734
01:03:35.039 --> 01:03:40.079
going into the shop quite regularly and buying gifts. It's

735
01:03:40.079 --> 01:03:43.880
a gift shop called Evolution, so I'd buy gifts for

736
01:03:44.039 --> 01:03:46.880
my nan or buy gifts for family from there, because

737
01:03:46.880 --> 01:03:49.159
I liked it in there, and I liked the atmosphere.

738
01:03:49.679 --> 01:03:54.800
I liked the calmness of the people that were working there,

739
01:03:55.639 --> 01:03:57.920
who I ended up being friends with. I ended up

740
01:03:57.960 --> 01:04:02.679
actually working there myself, but at that time I wasn't

741
01:04:02.719 --> 01:04:07.679
going to the Buddhist center. And then I'm not quite

742
01:04:07.760 --> 01:04:13.480
sure how it worked, but I ended up going and

743
01:04:13.519 --> 01:04:16.519
from then on. In fact, that very first night, I

744
01:04:16.639 --> 01:04:20.000
met my friend who I'm going to see in a

745
01:04:20.039 --> 01:04:28.000
couple of hours, and he was there and we just

746
01:04:28.039 --> 01:04:30.440
got on really well. I mean, what's that two thousand

747
01:04:30.480 --> 01:04:35.239
and two, three four five, So that's what twenty twenty

748
01:04:35.280 --> 01:04:41.320
three years? Twenty three years. Yeah, so I've known him

749
01:04:41.360 --> 01:04:44.960
for twenty two twenty three years. Even we lived with

750
01:04:45.039 --> 01:04:49.119
him for a little while. I worked with him twice,

751
01:04:49.639 --> 01:04:53.639
so because he lived in a Buddhist community when I

752
01:04:53.719 --> 01:04:58.119
moved in and then moved out. He moved out after

753
01:04:58.119 --> 01:05:00.000
a couple of weeks, but he was planning on moving

754
01:05:00.079 --> 01:05:02.400
now anyway. That's why they were looking for someone to

755
01:05:02.440 --> 01:05:08.119
move in. And I worked with him in the Evolution

756
01:05:08.199 --> 01:05:11.280
Shop in It's which he got me a job there

757
01:05:12.000 --> 01:05:15.840
because after going to the Buddhist Center for a while

758
01:05:17.320 --> 01:05:21.360
for about a year, Yeah, I kept I kept my

759
01:05:21.480 --> 01:05:23.199
job going for as long as I could. I didn't

760
01:05:23.199 --> 01:05:25.440
want to leave my job. I didn't want to lose it.

761
01:05:25.440 --> 01:05:27.559
Didn't want to leave it because I was good at it,

762
01:05:27.599 --> 01:05:33.480
and you know, I was doing quite well, but I

763
01:05:33.559 --> 01:05:35.599
wasn't well enough to keep going. And then in the

764
01:05:35.719 --> 01:05:38.000
end I had to leave. So it was another year.

765
01:05:38.119 --> 01:05:41.079
So it's the end of two thousand and three. Even

766
01:05:41.119 --> 01:05:43.760
though I'd gone part time, I just packed it in.

767
01:05:45.000 --> 01:05:50.480
I couldn't do it anymore. And that Christmas, my friend

768
01:05:51.199 --> 01:05:55.559
offered me a job just over the Christmas period working

769
01:05:56.159 --> 01:06:00.400
in the Evolution Shop because that was their busy part

770
01:06:00.400 --> 01:06:03.760
of the whole year. So I did. I worked there,

771
01:06:03.880 --> 01:06:08.679
probably not every day, probably three days a week or

772
01:06:08.800 --> 01:06:13.960
you know, part time, but just you know, having somewhere

773
01:06:14.199 --> 01:06:16.519
because I needed to have an income. But at the

774
01:06:16.559 --> 01:06:20.079
same time, I couldn't work full time. I didn't fill

775
01:06:20.199 --> 01:06:26.400
up to that, so and I worked there part time

776
01:06:27.760 --> 01:06:36.440
until the following August, and I kind of lived on

777
01:06:36.599 --> 01:06:39.719
savings really, and then again I ended up living on

778
01:06:39.760 --> 01:06:44.760
credit cards and stuff, which wasn't probably the best idea.

779
01:06:44.800 --> 01:06:51.199
And then and then I left, but I didn't leave

780
01:06:51.199 --> 01:06:54.559
the Budhet Center, but I left the shop, got a job,

781
01:06:56.840 --> 01:07:04.719
and I continued going to the Buddhist Center. Four soce

782
01:07:04.760 --> 01:07:11.840
is two thousand and four, I had my Mitra ceremony,

783
01:07:12.119 --> 01:07:14.400
which is kind of like I guess, like a christening,

784
01:07:16.519 --> 01:07:20.559
like a christening kind of thing. It's a ceremony. And

785
01:07:21.440 --> 01:07:24.440
that was in August two thousand, August or September two

786
01:07:24.519 --> 01:07:31.119
thousand and four. And then in two thousand and five

787
01:07:32.039 --> 01:07:36.960
I moved into the Buddhist community because I was going

788
01:07:37.079 --> 01:07:40.280
very well with the people living there, well most of them.

789
01:07:40.440 --> 01:07:43.119
I didn't know everyone, but I knew like at least

790
01:07:44.480 --> 01:07:49.480
one two, three people four in fact four people living there.

791
01:07:50.119 --> 01:07:52.559
There was another person I didn't know so well, but

792
01:07:52.639 --> 01:07:55.559
he moved out, and another person my friend who yeah,

793
01:07:55.719 --> 01:08:00.440
so and I lived there. In continue you go to

794
01:08:00.480 --> 01:08:08.440
the Buddhist Center from up until I left in two

795
01:08:08.480 --> 01:08:16.239
thousand and seven, around November time when I had to

796
01:08:16.279 --> 01:08:23.000
find basically there was a squirmish, a squirmish, and so

797
01:08:24.439 --> 01:08:26.880
I had to move out and I went and lived.

798
01:08:29.600 --> 01:08:32.520
I needed really to live closer to where the university was,

799
01:08:32.560 --> 01:08:36.920
which was in a different town, which is what I did.

800
01:08:37.359 --> 01:08:39.960
But then I started going to the Buddhist center in

801
01:08:40.000 --> 01:08:44.479
that town, and then I ended up working in the

802
01:08:45.479 --> 01:08:48.319
because a couple of people knew me anyway, because it

803
01:08:48.359 --> 01:08:52.479
was it wasn't that far away. And then I started

804
01:08:52.479 --> 01:09:00.039
working in the Evolution shop in that town because my

805
01:09:00.119 --> 01:09:02.920
friend was working there, the one that got me a

806
01:09:03.000 --> 01:09:07.039
job at the Evolution in Ipswich, got me a job

807
01:09:07.039 --> 01:09:12.279
at the Evolution in this town as well. And it

808
01:09:12.399 --> 01:09:17.760
was it was just part time again during Christmas the

809
01:09:17.920 --> 01:09:20.720
busiest time, and it was handy because I was a

810
01:09:20.760 --> 01:09:26.479
student that actually a little bit of money was useful.

811
01:09:26.840 --> 01:09:28.800
So I did that on and off for a couple

812
01:09:28.800 --> 01:09:34.359
of years during the period of being at university, really

813
01:09:36.319 --> 01:09:41.359
just part time Saturdays, not every Saturday, it's just whenever.

814
01:09:41.439 --> 01:09:49.960
Really you needn't be barking, please mate. And then I

815
01:09:50.000 --> 01:09:54.960
when I finished university, I moved literally around the corner

816
01:09:55.279 --> 01:09:59.600
from the Buddhist Center. So I was probably going a

817
01:09:59.600 --> 01:10:02.840
little bit more regular then because it's just up the road.

818
01:10:04.399 --> 01:10:06.319
And then I moved again a year later and it

819
01:10:06.399 --> 01:10:10.119
was also across across the road. It's just like the opposite,

820
01:10:10.239 --> 01:10:13.000
but it's still the same kind of distance, a little

821
01:10:13.000 --> 01:10:15.840
bit further away, but you know, ten minute walk, five

822
01:10:15.840 --> 01:10:20.760
minute walk, six minute walk, ten seven, eight nine, something

823
01:10:20.800 --> 01:10:25.960
like that, and so i'd go along. I used to

824
01:10:25.960 --> 01:10:28.239
go New Year's Eve and stuff like that as well.

825
01:10:31.279 --> 01:10:35.640
So I was involved in the Buddhist Center then during

826
01:10:35.680 --> 01:10:39.640
this period sort of especially like during two thousand and

827
01:10:40.680 --> 01:10:46.039
three two thousand and four, I bought so many books

828
01:10:46.079 --> 01:10:50.760
on Buddhism. It's just it's one of those things that

829
01:10:50.800 --> 01:10:53.159
I have a tendency of doing. If I really get

830
01:10:53.159 --> 01:10:57.960
into a subject, I'll buy every book I can. What

831
01:10:58.359 --> 01:11:03.279
I find is to study a subject, I like to

832
01:11:04.359 --> 01:11:09.079
if you, if you read enough books on a subject,

833
01:11:09.359 --> 01:11:16.680
you'll start to see repetition almost or yeah, you guarantee

834
01:11:16.760 --> 01:11:20.279
just see repetition. But that repetition is good because then

835
01:11:20.319 --> 01:11:23.760
it helps for me, It helps it to absorb it

836
01:11:25.199 --> 01:11:29.279
and also get to see things from a slightly different

837
01:11:29.439 --> 01:11:38.760
angle or different opinion or expressed in a slightly way,

838
01:11:39.119 --> 01:11:42.920
you know. So that that's what I did. Bought a

839
01:11:42.920 --> 01:11:45.399
lot of books. I ended up giving most of them

840
01:11:45.439 --> 01:11:53.479
to the Buddhist Center. Yeah, I did accept this one.

841
01:11:54.000 --> 01:11:57.039
The reason I know is because I didn't print. I

842
01:11:57.079 --> 01:12:00.279
didn't print because I printed the Buddhist Center's print it.

843
01:12:01.319 --> 01:12:03.199
But I didn't give this one. And when I kept

844
01:12:03.199 --> 01:12:06.279
this one, this was never this will be with me,

845
01:12:07.840 --> 01:12:12.239
this will be me, this is this is with me forever,

846
01:12:12.279 --> 01:12:23.319
I guess now. And when I moved away to hear

847
01:12:24.680 --> 01:12:27.600
So there's a lot of things happened in the Buddhist world,

848
01:12:27.640 --> 01:12:32.319
you know, since I've been involved. I went to retreats

849
01:12:32.359 --> 01:12:35.000
and I went on a pain management retreat as well,

850
01:12:35.520 --> 01:12:39.680
back in two thousand and five, I think, unless it

851
01:12:39.720 --> 01:12:45.439
was two thousand and six, and I think it might

852
01:12:45.439 --> 01:12:48.359
have been two thousand and six. And that was amazing

853
01:12:48.560 --> 01:12:53.359
because I was interested in pain relief as a practitioner

854
01:12:53.399 --> 01:12:57.199
and this was like a breath works mindfulness pain relief

855
01:12:59.640 --> 01:13:03.159
and lasted for about a week I think two weeks

856
01:13:03.239 --> 01:13:07.079
a week. I think it's about a week. So as

857
01:13:07.079 --> 01:13:16.199
well as being a retreat, it was also training as well. Yeah,

858
01:13:16.680 --> 01:13:22.319
so I used to go out and meet up with Buddhists.

859
01:13:22.359 --> 01:13:24.039
I used to meet up with my friend that I'm

860
01:13:24.079 --> 01:13:28.680
seeing today when I was in the same town. You know,

861
01:13:28.760 --> 01:13:32.720
when I first started going to the Buddhist center, we

862
01:13:32.840 --> 01:13:36.359
used to meet up quite often, once a week, once

863
01:13:36.359 --> 01:13:41.640
every two weeks, and he almost kind of became like

864
01:13:41.680 --> 01:13:45.920
a counselor to me. It wasn't the idea, it wasn't

865
01:13:45.920 --> 01:13:49.680
the plan, and that wasn't his intention. But I used

866
01:13:49.680 --> 01:13:53.520
to just go and unload and he just sit down

867
01:13:53.560 --> 01:13:59.479
and listen, and you know, it was probably wasn't really

868
01:13:59.560 --> 01:14:03.319
fair on him, but he was so so gentle and

869
01:14:03.520 --> 01:14:11.159
so what the right word attentive? And I said to him,

870
01:14:12.479 --> 01:14:15.680
why don't you, why don't you become a counselor, and

871
01:14:15.720 --> 01:14:22.159
they said he didn't want to. But then once I'd

872
01:14:22.199 --> 01:14:26.359
finished my counseling course, he trained up to become a counselor.

873
01:14:28.960 --> 01:14:31.760
So he also is a counselor. Well, he's trained. I

874
01:14:31.800 --> 01:14:34.399
don't know if he's seeing clients or not. I don't know.

875
01:14:35.000 --> 01:14:38.279
I know why not. I haven't seen clients for over

876
01:14:38.319 --> 01:14:47.600
a decade now. I wouldn't even know how what what why?

877
01:14:49.760 --> 01:14:52.640
I'm sure I must have some skills. I don't know

878
01:14:53.600 --> 01:15:01.399
it h but yeah, it's so I've seen him go

879
01:15:01.479 --> 01:15:03.680
through lots of different things. I mean, he's now got

880
01:15:04.840 --> 01:15:14.960
a kid that's probably thirteen, twelve, thirteen, fourteen now. And

881
01:15:15.039 --> 01:15:17.600
I went to his wedding which was in probably about

882
01:15:18.119 --> 01:15:30.439
two thousand and nine, which is yeah, two thousand and nine,

883
01:15:34.560 --> 01:15:40.920
twenty nineteen, so yeah, probably the next year they had

884
01:15:40.920 --> 01:15:45.800
a baby, so it's probably fifteen years old. He's boy. Now, Wow,

885
01:15:47.159 --> 01:15:50.319
it's really weird. My niece. I got a message from

886
01:15:50.359 --> 01:15:53.760
my stepmom saying, I'll just letting you know that your

887
01:15:53.800 --> 01:15:59.199
niece is now fift it's her seventeenth birthday today. This

888
01:15:59.359 --> 01:16:02.920
is yesterday. I forgot to send a card. But hey,

889
01:16:04.359 --> 01:16:15.039
and seventeen, and I remember, it doesn't seem long ago

890
01:16:15.039 --> 01:16:17.960
that she was running around two all of us and

891
01:16:18.039 --> 01:16:21.520
just punching us all in the balls. You know what

892
01:16:21.640 --> 01:16:23.800
was last year? No, but you know when she was

893
01:16:23.800 --> 01:16:26.159
a little kid, you know, kid doing they just sort

894
01:16:26.199 --> 01:16:29.119
of they realized they found a place where they can

895
01:16:29.239 --> 01:16:33.279
hurt you. And I had a video camera and I

896
01:16:33.319 --> 01:16:41.720
filmed her when she was probably five four something like that,

897
01:16:42.800 --> 01:16:44.359
and she was at a dinner table if it was

898
01:16:44.399 --> 01:16:47.319
at Christmas, and I was filming and she was just

899
01:16:48.079 --> 01:16:52.800
being so funny. It's not making faces and doing all

900
01:16:52.840 --> 01:16:57.239
funny voices and stuff. But I lost it. I lost

901
01:16:57.279 --> 01:17:03.560
the film footage. I don't know what happened. And it's

902
01:17:03.560 --> 01:17:06.199
a little bit unlike me because I did. I kept

903
01:17:06.239 --> 01:17:08.720
a lot of film footage that well, most film footage

904
01:17:08.760 --> 01:17:11.680
that I took with that camera is actually on YouTube.

905
01:17:11.720 --> 01:17:17.039
Now that wouldn't be, of course, because that's of family

906
01:17:17.079 --> 01:17:20.600
and stuff. I wouldn't show. I wouldn't have videos of

907
01:17:20.720 --> 01:17:24.560
kids and stuff on my YouTube channel. Even with my neighbor,

908
01:17:25.520 --> 01:17:32.319
I was filming Vinnie in their garden, and I made

909
01:17:32.359 --> 01:17:34.680
sure that the little girl wasn't in the camera. You

910
01:17:34.680 --> 01:17:39.119
could hear a voice. But I'm not filming. I just

911
01:17:39.159 --> 01:17:40.880
want to All I want is to film Vinie. I

912
01:17:40.880 --> 01:17:44.319
don't want to film humans. I don't want humans on

913
01:17:44.359 --> 01:17:50.880
the camera. It's laying on the floor, the windows the

914
01:17:50.920 --> 01:17:53.720
curtains are open, and the sun shining in, and he's

915
01:17:53.760 --> 01:17:57.399
found the one little part where the sun's still shining

916
01:17:57.479 --> 01:18:06.079
on the carpet. Honestly, it's almost dog shaped size. He

917
01:18:06.239 --> 01:18:11.640
fits in it perfectly. It's a tiny little bit on

918
01:18:11.680 --> 01:18:16.560
the carpet that's got some He makes me laugh. He's

919
01:18:16.600 --> 01:18:22.279
so funny, he's so cute. But I know if I

920
01:18:22.319 --> 01:18:24.119
went over and I touched him, you'd growl at me.

921
01:18:25.920 --> 01:18:30.319
It doesn't like being disturbed, but it's okay for him

922
01:18:31.119 --> 01:18:33.920
to disturb me. It's fine for me to disturb him,

923
01:18:35.520 --> 01:18:39.239
mind you. I woke up this morning and he was

924
01:18:39.319 --> 01:18:45.720
just standing over me, and I thought he needed to

925
01:18:45.720 --> 01:18:49.239
get up and go, but he didn't. He didn't want

926
01:18:49.239 --> 01:18:51.600
to go out, didn't want anything. As soon as I

927
01:18:51.640 --> 01:18:53.359
got out of bed, he just went back and laid

928
01:18:53.359 --> 01:18:57.039
down to go to sleep. So I'm thinking he woke

929
01:18:57.119 --> 01:19:00.880
me up. So maybe but I was making some weird

930
01:19:00.920 --> 01:19:04.159
noises or something and he was concerned, so he woke

931
01:19:04.239 --> 01:19:06.720
me up. Or he was protecting me, guarding me or

932
01:19:06.760 --> 01:19:14.560
something which or just watching me. Either he was he

933
01:19:15.640 --> 01:19:20.039
was helping me, or he's just a weirdo, a bit

934
01:19:20.079 --> 01:19:27.479
of both. Tech staff is da dar. See if I've

935
01:19:27.479 --> 01:19:34.720
got any messages? Okay, right? PayPal? Yeah that's just for

936
01:19:34.760 --> 01:19:42.760
the groceries I got delivered, which is fine, Okay, it's

937
01:19:42.800 --> 01:19:55.800
not coming up right. Another message? My what sit downstairs? Jason? Sorry, babe,

938
01:19:56.399 --> 01:19:58.520
do you have any fizzy drink? As my sugar levels

939
01:19:58.520 --> 01:20:10.159
are really low. I don't nothing. I don't sorry, I'm

940
01:20:10.199 --> 01:20:16.960
not allowed to drink fizzy drinks, although saying that some

941
01:20:17.720 --> 01:20:24.319
times I have. Oh, I could give her an ice

942
01:20:24.359 --> 01:20:28.520
cream I got, Yeah, I could give her that. I

943
01:20:28.520 --> 01:20:31.960
would be I've just got some cornetto's, could give her

944
01:20:31.960 --> 01:20:35.439
a cornetto I suppose every day she asks us something.

945
01:20:37.199 --> 01:20:38.920
The weird thing about it is she doesn't even talk

946
01:20:38.960 --> 01:20:41.960
to me. She like has no conversation with me at all,

947
01:20:42.479 --> 01:20:47.199
but constantly asking stuff. So that's today, yesterday, hijason, do

948
01:20:47.199 --> 01:20:49.600
you have some juice please? As I literally only have one,

949
01:20:49.720 --> 01:20:59.600
only have tap water. That was yesterday and last Tuesday?

950
01:21:00.039 --> 01:21:03.640
Do you have any frozen meals? I could nick because

951
01:21:03.680 --> 01:21:09.039
I'm waiting on the food bank. And the Thursday before

952
01:21:09.039 --> 01:21:14.479
that can you put if she wanted me, have someone

953
01:21:14.520 --> 01:21:18.880
put money into my account. And then the Monday before

954
01:21:18.920 --> 01:21:22.760
that you got some butter. I can borrow to butter

955
01:21:22.880 --> 01:21:29.479
some rolls. And then the Sunday before that is r

956
01:21:29.479 --> 01:21:32.039
anywhere you can order me some white chest of drawers

957
01:21:32.039 --> 01:21:34.520
on a pay monthly for the baby, as I got

958
01:21:34.560 --> 01:21:38.520
so much baby clothes now nowhere to put them, and

959
01:21:43.720 --> 01:21:48.279
I can pay you once a month towards it, like, no,

960
01:21:49.199 --> 01:21:53.439
I can't get credit. I literally cannot get credit. Even

961
01:21:53.479 --> 01:21:59.359
if I wanted to, I couldn't. It's amazing, absolutely amazing.

962
01:22:01.720 --> 01:22:06.600
So length, okay, the the Sunday before that, have you

963
01:22:06.680 --> 01:22:13.960
got a lighter? Please? Sunday before that? Can you keep

964
01:22:14.000 --> 01:22:24.279
my can you keep an eye on my flat? It

965
01:22:24.520 --> 01:22:27.439
goes on. I told I had a friend that did this.

966
01:22:27.600 --> 01:22:32.760
It's okay. And then the thirtieth of April, do you

967
01:22:32.800 --> 01:22:34.560
have any money I could have because I need to

968
01:22:34.760 --> 01:22:37.680
go to London. I need twenty pound which I didn't

969
01:22:37.680 --> 01:22:42.239
have any money. So that's the twenty fifth of April.

970
01:22:44.920 --> 01:22:47.720
Fifth of April. Don't suppose you've got fifteen pound I

971
01:22:47.760 --> 01:22:50.359
can have so I can get a or if you

972
01:22:50.399 --> 01:22:53.399
can just order me an egg, egg, fried rice, sat

973
01:22:53.439 --> 01:22:59.039
a chicken and chips from the Chinese. It's like, what

974
01:22:59.079 --> 01:23:02.880
did I answer that? Nope, got no money, but you

975
01:23:02.880 --> 01:23:06.840
can have a pasta pack just needs boiling. I left

976
01:23:06.840 --> 01:23:11.199
a bag outside your door. I don't think she ate that.

977
01:23:12.600 --> 01:23:19.640
And in the Thursday before that, oh no, And oh

978
01:23:19.680 --> 01:23:26.720
the Wednesday before that, do you have any potatoes? Friday

979
01:23:26.760 --> 01:23:34.319
before that do you have any chocolates? And Friday twenty

980
01:23:34.359 --> 01:23:36.960
first of March, I wonder if you had in money

981
01:23:36.960 --> 01:23:45.960
I could borrow for taxi okay, which I didn't. And

982
01:23:45.960 --> 01:23:51.199
then the Monday, BlimE me, that's amazing, this is amazing.

983
01:23:51.319 --> 01:23:57.359
The Monday, seventeenth March, I wonder if you could transfer

984
01:23:57.439 --> 01:24:01.479
me seventeen pound so I can give you cash at midnight,

985
01:24:08.239 --> 01:24:10.079
or if you can borrow me the money, could you

986
01:24:10.199 --> 01:24:16.920
order me a big Mac? That was a no um?

987
01:24:19.479 --> 01:24:22.920
Twenty seventh of February. Is there any way you could

988
01:24:22.920 --> 01:24:24.720
do me a big favor and try and get me

989
01:24:24.760 --> 01:24:28.600
an iPhone? Please? Mine keeps turning off and he's smashed,

990
01:24:28.960 --> 01:24:30.760
and I'm having whatever. I'm not going to be the

991
01:24:30.800 --> 01:24:33.359
whole thing out. I can pay you next week when

992
01:24:33.359 --> 01:24:46.000
I'm paid. I said, I have no money. Is the

993
01:24:46.039 --> 01:24:50.560
only way you could get paid monthly? And I said

994
01:24:50.560 --> 01:24:59.760
I can't. I can't, I can't borrow any money. Whatever.

995
01:24:59.800 --> 01:25:05.399
Look nineteenth of February, will I be able to ask?

996
01:25:05.479 --> 01:25:10.840
Can I can you boy boy? Sixty pound? I said, sorry,

997
01:25:10.880 --> 01:25:12.880
I've already learnt some an eighty pounds and they didn't

998
01:25:12.880 --> 01:25:19.600
pay it back, which left me with nothing. What other one?

999
01:25:19.680 --> 01:25:44.000
What's the next one? Uh? Just kind of just going back,

1000
01:25:47.840 --> 01:25:53.680
all right, January, Oh jes, so you got any eggs?

1001
01:25:54.000 --> 01:26:00.279
This is last January. Third of January, do you have

1002
01:26:00.279 --> 01:26:04.560
any Do you have ten pound I can borrow? Third

1003
01:26:04.560 --> 01:26:16.720
of January? Any painkillers? Seventeenth December last year? Any painkillers?

1004
01:26:18.560 --> 01:26:31.279
Fifteenth December? You've got a lighter? Please? Twenty third of October?

1005
01:26:31.920 --> 01:26:35.199
Do you have seventeen pound? You can put in my count?

1006
01:26:41.640 --> 01:26:45.199
Don't have any money as I couldn't. Nineteenth of October?

1007
01:26:49.000 --> 01:26:51.039
Can I have six pound or eight pounds to borrow

1008
01:26:51.119 --> 01:27:00.680
off you? And then a big whatever? Information? I said

1009
01:27:01.119 --> 01:27:08.199
zero cash? Sixteenth the day before? Wow, can I borrow

1010
01:27:08.239 --> 01:27:13.079
you ten or fifteen pounds? I got thirty seven pence

1011
01:27:13.079 --> 01:27:17.039
so I can do that. Fifteenth of October last year,

1012
01:27:18.319 --> 01:27:24.640
do you have any newspapers I can use? Sixteenth of October?

1013
01:27:25.000 --> 01:27:31.439
Have you got any milk? Okay? What's the next one?

1014
01:27:31.600 --> 01:27:42.239
Going back? Seventh of October. See this is when this

1015
01:27:42.279 --> 01:27:44.800
is at a time when I was helping her. I

1016
01:27:44.840 --> 01:27:49.520
had to stop after this. My heating box is not working.

1017
01:27:49.600 --> 01:27:53.640
I was wondering if you know how to whatever? Just wondering.

1018
01:27:53.920 --> 01:27:56.319
This is seventh October, wondering if you have ten pounds

1019
01:27:56.319 --> 01:28:00.680
till Thursday, as I'm very not very well, so I

1020
01:28:00.720 --> 01:28:03.079
put ten pounds in a bank and I just texted

1021
01:28:03.079 --> 01:28:06.520
that to her. Oh sorry, I'm at a garage and

1022
01:28:06.520 --> 01:28:18.680
on a six pounds short. Could you help me out? Yeah?

1023
01:28:18.680 --> 01:28:24.920
It just goes on and on and on. It's weird.

1024
01:28:25.840 --> 01:28:29.680
Seventeenth of August last year, do you have thirty pounds?

1025
01:28:29.680 --> 01:28:47.319
I can board to get whatever where's you're going? Wow? Friday,

1026
01:28:47.720 --> 01:28:52.159
nineteenth of July? Could you transfer me sixty nine pence?

1027
01:28:53.880 --> 01:28:55.920
And then a little while later, can you put twenty

1028
01:28:55.920 --> 01:29:00.920
pounds on my account? And I give you cash? I

1029
01:29:00.960 --> 01:29:05.359
had no money in my accounsel I couldn't thirty first

1030
01:29:05.359 --> 01:29:08.279
of July? Do you have a tape measure? I don't

1031
01:29:08.319 --> 01:29:22.560
know what that was about? Random? Oh this is the word.

1032
01:29:23.239 --> 01:29:26.479
Thirteenth of July? Could I connect my to your WiFi? Please?

1033
01:29:26.560 --> 01:29:31.439
My date was low No no, no no no no.

1034
01:29:31.520 --> 01:29:34.560
That you give someone your password for your WiFi, that's

1035
01:29:34.560 --> 01:29:37.239
it forever. Then you're never going to get them off.

1036
01:29:38.079 --> 01:29:40.880
You can block people and you can change the password,

1037
01:29:40.960 --> 01:29:45.600
but BlimE me, I can't bother with that. Okay, so

1038
01:29:45.640 --> 01:29:57.600
we're going back to seventh of July. So wow, seventeenth

1039
01:29:57.880 --> 01:30:05.039
seventh of July. Oh yeah, I let my umbrella. I

1040
01:30:05.039 --> 01:30:09.439
didn't get my umbrella back then. I need you, really

1041
01:30:09.479 --> 01:30:14.199
need your help. I'm in a taxi. I only have

1042
01:30:14.319 --> 01:30:17.319
three pound and I put I have less than you.

1043
01:30:19.039 --> 01:30:34.159
So what do I do? Wow, it's weird just looking

1044
01:30:34.199 --> 01:30:40.239
back at it, it's uh oh yeah, what is this?

1045
01:30:40.479 --> 01:30:45.279
Back in God? This was like constant. This is a

1046
01:30:45.319 --> 01:30:55.720
long This is a twenty seventh, twenty seventh for June,

1047
01:30:56.039 --> 01:31:05.840
twenty seventh for June. So twenty sixth of June. I

1048
01:31:06.000 --> 01:31:07.640
just want to check your okay, as there was an

1049
01:31:07.640 --> 01:31:11.439
ambulance outside at four m this morning. I'm okay and

1050
01:31:14.279 --> 01:31:16.680
very lot. I don't have money for fizzy drink or chocolate.

1051
01:31:19.600 --> 01:31:36.600
The ambulance wasn't for her anyway, So I got I

1052
01:31:36.720 --> 01:31:40.800
got some coke. I less some coke outside your door.

1053
01:31:40.840 --> 01:31:57.199
This is on the twenty seventh. Can you Oh yeah,

1054
01:31:57.279 --> 01:32:08.079
can you? So you want to borrow a fifty quid?

1055
01:32:09.079 --> 01:32:16.439
Could you buy me three for my prescription? And then

1056
01:32:16.520 --> 01:32:20.760
later on another fourteen pound? Wow? This is just silly,

1057
01:32:20.800 --> 01:32:24.279
isn't it. Oh well, I'll move on from that because

1058
01:32:25.760 --> 01:32:27.880
it's weird because she's only lived here for three months

1059
01:32:28.279 --> 01:32:31.920
he's only moved in last monk. There's only been here

1060
01:32:31.960 --> 01:32:39.199
three days. So I think one of the downsides of

1061
01:32:39.319 --> 01:32:42.800
the Buddhism, I guess was well, not a downside, but

1062
01:32:43.039 --> 01:32:47.279
I tried to help people. I guess one of the

1063
01:32:47.319 --> 01:32:52.840
downsides of helping people is more here than anywhere else.

1064
01:32:52.920 --> 01:32:58.119
Not here, but like in this area, people have sort

1065
01:32:58.119 --> 01:33:01.920
of took advantage of it, or took advantage of the situation,

1066
01:33:02.039 --> 01:33:07.359
and bit by bit I've managed to stop it. I'm

1067
01:33:07.359 --> 01:33:09.399
still getting asked for stuff, but I just say no.

1068
01:33:10.000 --> 01:33:12.319
I had another neighbor downstairs knock on my door when

1069
01:33:12.319 --> 01:33:16.479
I was in bed on Friday about eleven o'clock, asking

1070
01:33:16.520 --> 01:33:20.840
if I had twenty pound. She said, oh, I need,

1071
01:33:21.039 --> 01:33:25.000
I need some tobacco. If you got twenty pound, Well,

1072
01:33:25.039 --> 01:33:29.479
twenty pound doesn't buy tobacco. It's like thirty six pounds

1073
01:33:29.560 --> 01:33:31.800
or something, so twenty pound's not going to get you anything.

1074
01:33:32.640 --> 01:33:34.960
And I said, but she did, you know? She just

1075
01:33:35.000 --> 01:33:38.760
want And I said no, she'd okay, bye, so she

1076
01:33:38.760 --> 01:33:41.760
didn't hassle me for it. But like I don't have

1077
01:33:41.800 --> 01:33:45.560
any money, I don't have any cash. I'm thinking of

1078
01:33:45.640 --> 01:33:48.600
getting a big sign sticking it on my door. My

1079
01:33:48.680 --> 01:33:52.439
front door. You know those? What do those? You know

1080
01:33:52.479 --> 01:33:57.680
when a shop is empty? And they said, this property

1081
01:33:57.720 --> 01:34:04.039
does not contain cash. Some shops had that, don't they

1082
01:34:04.079 --> 01:34:08.439
in the window when they're closed. I remember when I

1083
01:34:08.439 --> 01:34:11.359
worked in the chip shop, he always left the till

1084
01:34:11.439 --> 01:34:14.560
open and I said, why do you do that? Then

1085
01:34:15.199 --> 01:34:18.720
he said, because if someone does break in it, they

1086
01:34:18.760 --> 01:34:24.279
can just help themselves to because there was always like

1087
01:34:24.359 --> 01:34:27.479
a float, maybe twenty quid or something. They can help

1088
01:34:27.479 --> 01:34:32.199
themselves to that and leave. They haven't got a take.

1089
01:34:32.279 --> 01:34:34.319
They won't take the till with them, and I think

1090
01:34:34.319 --> 01:34:37.520
the till was quite expensive, probably a few underquid, so

1091
01:34:38.399 --> 01:34:41.039
they won't break the till because generally they'll smash the

1092
01:34:41.079 --> 01:34:44.439
till up to get into it, even though underneath the

1093
01:34:44.520 --> 01:34:46.680
till was a little catch which you could push and

1094
01:34:46.720 --> 01:34:50.800
it would open it. I don't know if they still

1095
01:34:50.800 --> 01:34:56.119
have that end tills. They had it in a oh

1096
01:34:56.159 --> 01:34:59.520
When I was in the comedy club, they had one

1097
01:35:00.000 --> 01:35:05.560
which was really old. For some reason, my boss liked it.

1098
01:35:05.880 --> 01:35:11.600
It didn't work at all, but it looked nice. It's

1099
01:35:11.680 --> 01:35:15.199
like wooden, but you could open it from the bottom.

1100
01:35:15.319 --> 01:35:18.039
So I think maybe a lot of tills you can

1101
01:35:18.119 --> 01:35:20.760
just open them from the bottom, A press a button

1102
01:35:20.840 --> 01:35:23.760
or a lever and they open, so you haven't got

1103
01:35:23.840 --> 01:35:26.680
smash them and break them or anything. I mean, listen,

1104
01:35:26.720 --> 01:35:30.600
I'm not giving advice to thieves. If he was to

1105
01:35:30.640 --> 01:35:36.399
break into a shop, here's my advice. No, not really,

1106
01:35:40.439 --> 01:35:42.880
but yeah, this was about Buddhism. It didn't really end

1107
01:35:42.960 --> 01:35:47.479
up being about Buddhism, did it. Not really? Not really,

1108
01:35:48.359 --> 01:35:58.439
I replied to the neighbor downstairs or not, I can't remember. Wow,

1109
01:35:58.680 --> 01:36:03.359
that's a lot of I's sorry, I replied. There. The

1110
01:36:03.479 --> 01:36:05.640
thing is, if I do take her anything down like

1111
01:36:05.680 --> 01:36:07.800
the other day, I want to have a chat with her,

1112
01:36:08.039 --> 01:36:10.159
just to find out what's going on. So can I

1113
01:36:10.199 --> 01:36:14.239
come in and got no clothes on? I said, that's fine,

1114
01:36:15.640 --> 01:36:23.279
And doesn't talk to me, doesn't have any any conversation

1115
01:36:23.399 --> 01:36:28.039
with her or anything. It's just it's almost like she

1116
01:36:28.039 --> 01:36:32.319
doesn't like me at all. Yeah, she lasks her stuff.

1117
01:36:32.359 --> 01:36:36.600
I don't. I don't kind of understand that. It's weird.

1118
01:36:37.079 --> 01:36:41.920
It just seems a bit strange. I did buy her television,

1119
01:36:44.079 --> 01:36:48.279
that's a long, a long while ago. That was the

1120
01:36:48.319 --> 01:37:01.880
second of June last year, second of June. Oh yeah,

1121
01:37:01.880 --> 01:37:03.439
she wanted me to go. She asked me to go

1122
01:37:03.479 --> 01:37:06.479
to television, and she said I'd like one like yours

1123
01:37:06.680 --> 01:37:09.720
or a little smaller. And my answer was, my TV

1124
01:37:09.840 --> 01:37:13.119
is huge. There's no way I can. So I got

1125
01:37:13.119 --> 01:37:15.079
this on a special offer and I paid for it

1126
01:37:15.119 --> 01:37:17.479
over a long time. But this was like over a

1127
01:37:17.960 --> 01:37:23.199
grand or maybe just under one thousand pounds. It's like,

1128
01:37:23.279 --> 01:37:28.079
I think, I don't know what size it is, seventy

1129
01:37:28.119 --> 01:37:31.279
five eighty five something like that, but she got I

1130
01:37:31.359 --> 01:37:43.600
ended up getting her a fifty five inch one. Wow.

1131
01:37:46.760 --> 01:37:53.720
So yeah, it's just not going to look when my

1132
01:37:53.880 --> 01:38:03.079
very first message, I want the very first message. Eighteenth

1133
01:38:03.079 --> 01:38:11.920
of May last year, eighteenth of my very first message.

1134
01:38:12.119 --> 01:38:14.840
So soon as she got a message, this is probably

1135
01:38:14.840 --> 01:38:22.840
the day I gave her the telephone number. How are you?

1136
01:38:23.239 --> 01:38:27.239
This is at half six eighteenth, so you'd be a Saturday.

1137
01:38:27.279 --> 01:38:31.560
Probably cool. Thanks, just watching boxing? Okay, that's good. I'm

1138
01:38:31.600 --> 01:38:33.399
just waiting to see if my friend can borrow me

1139
01:38:33.439 --> 01:38:47.680
twenty pounds to get food. So I'm like, okay, so

1140
01:38:47.760 --> 01:38:50.840
I must have maybe a callder. So I ended up

1141
01:38:50.840 --> 01:39:21.800
giving her that money. So yeah, oh dear, so yeah,

1142
01:39:21.960 --> 01:39:25.560
I see. That's the end of the recording. The end

1143
01:39:25.560 --> 01:39:29.119
of the recording. La La la la la la la Na.

1144
01:39:38.640 --> 01:39:44.199
I'm feeling quite hungry anyone else. I can't be bothered

1145
01:39:44.239 --> 01:39:46.880
to go out though, I might have to cancel going out.

1146
01:39:47.119 --> 01:39:49.840
I'm not really in the mood. I don't want to

1147
01:39:49.840 --> 01:39:54.960
go out. I don't really don't, but I don't know

1148
01:39:56.239 --> 01:40:10.000
or don't. Yeah, did it? Here we go walking down

1149
01:40:10.119 --> 01:40:40.880
the street. Mm hmmm, Oh, what's hired? Mm hmm how interesting?

1150
01:40:43.079 --> 01:41:10.399
Deep dd dede. So I'm just looking at some and online.

1151
01:41:12.039 --> 01:41:18.439
So really that's pretty much the end of the record.

1152
01:41:18.479 --> 01:41:28.720
And I do believe is it time to eat though?

1153
01:41:28.720 --> 01:41:31.720
Because when did I eat last night? And ten? Yeah,

1154
01:41:31.760 --> 01:41:35.199
maybe it is. Yeah, I think I'm going to cancel

1155
01:41:35.880 --> 01:41:40.800
my meeting. I don't want to go out after all

1156
01:41:40.840 --> 01:41:47.000
these nice things I said about him, I just coming bothered.

1157
01:41:55.359 --> 01:41:58.800
It's not just that I just can't. Yeah, you know

1158
01:42:03.399 --> 01:42:18.840
not can't you bother? That's not the right word. Am hm. Oh,

1159
01:42:17.640 --> 01:42:21.920
I have suffered to eat and then I see how

1160
01:42:21.960 --> 01:42:34.880
I feel afterwards. So yeah, thank you for listening. I

1161
01:42:34.880 --> 01:42:37.960
feel like I really wound down this recording to almost

1162
01:42:38.039 --> 01:42:46.760
to stand still. It's so real, So thank you for listening.

1163
01:42:46.920 --> 01:42:51.840
Remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve

1164
01:42:51.960 --> 01:43:00.800
to be happy. Remember to be gentle with yourself. You

1165
01:43:00.920 --> 01:43:08.319
deserve to feel safe. Lots of Love by