Aug. 6, 2025

(no music) (5 hours) Useless Inventions | Trivia Tuesday | LMBYTS #1407 | Jason Newland | 6th August 2025

(no music) (5 hours) Useless Inventions | Trivia Tuesday | LMBYTS #1407 | Jason Newland | 6th August 2025
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WEBVTT

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Hello, and welcome to Jason Newland dot com. My name's

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Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close

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your eyes. This is Trivia Tuesday. Yeah, Trivia Tuesday.

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Oh that's nice.

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Yeah, I'm ever so pleased about that there hasn't been

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a Trivia Tuesday for auges.

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Yes, this is Trivia Tuesday, a little bit late, a

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little bit, a little bit late. So today's Trivia Tuesday.

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I'm going to focus on inventions that solved no problem

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at all, so basically, gadgets that no one ever needed.

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I'll try and think, you know, basically, I try and

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come up with some really just silly stuff if I can.

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And this is fairly silly, so I've not gone through

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them yet. I've got Emily don't manage to find fifty

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D three, so that should be enough. I'm fifty three,

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so anyway, I hope you will. This is weird. This

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morning I took Vine out for walking the park like

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I do ever we do.

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And and.

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What was strange. I'll tell you. What's strange is how

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the microphone seems to be changing its volume for some reason,

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and I don't quite know why.

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Why is it doing that?

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I don't know, very strange. I'm unsure as to why

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it's so low, but I'm hoping upon hoping that I

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can sort out the volume because this is annoying me

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a little bit, just because I'm trying to get the

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auto quality to be the best it can be, the

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best that I can get. Anyway, I did do a

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sleep hip, not this recording, earlier, so you may want

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to check that out. Oh yeah, I took Vinnie for

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a walk and oh man, who was in the park,

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And the first thing I noticed is this big well actually,

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before we even got into the park, I looked to

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my left and there was this big hot air balloon

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in the sky, which isn't something that I normally see.

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Might not look up into the sky all the time,

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but it was I'd bang into things, but I don't

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normally see a hot air balloon. And it was virgin

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and virgin on the side of it, so I don't know.

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But basically, Vinnie was scared of it. So I don't

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know if he's scared of virgins or he's scared of

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hot air balloons, I don't know, but he was scared

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and he was running away. He kept looking back and

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running away so we ended up having to leave the

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park after about seven or eight minutes. Didn't like it.

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He was okay when we were near a tree because

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he couldn't see it. So because he couldn't see it

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I guess it had disappeared in his brain. And then

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on my ar maneuvered him so that he could still

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see it again, and then he wanted to leave. So

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we left, and I wasn't quite sure why he was

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bothered by it. That's a problem. I can't ask what

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I did ask him, but he wouldn't answer. He can

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be quite stubborn at times. I don't know what it was.

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I mean, this is big red hot air balloom, but

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it wasn't like It's not like it was on the ground,

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because it would have, from the looks of it, would

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have taken up the whole of the field. But maybe

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he's never seen one before. Maybe he thought it was

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a ball. Why is that ball not landing? Maybe that's

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what he thought. He was a ball that was just

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heading towards him and it wasn't like. Well, maybe he's

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just annoyed because of the ball he couldn't get to

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the other day. Wow, he stole another ball, another ball's dog.

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He stole another dog's ball, and I didn't even know

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he'd done it. I'm always watching out for him to

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do stuff like that and make sure that I get

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the ball off of him give it back to the

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dog whose ball it is. But the other day we just,

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you know, I'm wondering why Vinnie's so excited to get

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home his tails. He's really excited to get home, and

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I'm thinking that's strange. He must must have had enough

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of being in the park. And then just as we

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was heading towards the house, I saw in his mouth

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this ball. He was so happy. We got inside and

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he couldn't wait. He ran into the living room with

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the lead still on normally he does, and he stops

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and lets me take the lead off, and I said

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come back, and he came back and the ball wasn't

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in his mouth. He'd hidden the ball. So I let

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him off the lead and he ran back in there,

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and I went in and there he was like licking

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the ball. Even now I don't know where it is.

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He's hidden it. That's his ball. Now it's his. He's

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never going to give it back. I can't believe I've

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raised a thief among the worst people in the world

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as a thief, and I've raised one. My son's a thief.

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Ah ah, I can never trust him now. But I

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just found it really weird this morning how a hot

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air balloon would freak him. Completely freaked him out on

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a level that I've not seen before. Normally, he's not

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too bothered about stuff. He's not really scared of anything

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generally other than puddles. He will drink out of a puddle,

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but he won't step in a puddle. Is he a

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little bit like his brother Andre? Like that would not

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walk through a puddle, which reminds me I need to

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give him a bath. He hasn't had a bath in ages.

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I need to. Oh. Yes, So I'm trying to think

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what else I did do a Monday's boiling objects on Monday?

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Oh yeah, I talked about bodybuilding. Yeah, and I was

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doing like a daily whisper let me boy to sleep

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when I first got out of bed. But this morning

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when I got up, I kind of partly couldn't be

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bothered to do it, and partly the neighbor that I

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got a neighbor over the fence that was shouting up

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at their neighbor about all the noise they'd been making

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about how inconsiderate they were being, Yet that one was

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shouting up there half forward this morning, there's sure there's

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some irony in that whole situation. And I knew that

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if I was going to try and do a recording

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all of it, all you'd hear was that rah rah

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rah rah rah rah rah rah. And I just didn't

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think that would be just not ideal for me. Now,

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what I'm planning to do is get some kind of

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plug for the window. Now, I've been meaning to do

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this for years. I just haven't got around to it.

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I've done a bit of research. Now. The one thing

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I can't do is build it myself. That ain't gonna happen.

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It's not allowed. I will make a mess. It's just

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no DIY is not my thing. So I've tried to

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think of different possibilities that may be useful. Now I

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did feel my fill the whole window sill with books,

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and that did that did dampen down the noise, which was,

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you know, good, but at the same time not practical

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first of all, because that's not where I wanted them.

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I was just I was in the middle of trying

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tidy up and get a bit more organized. So I've

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got all my hypnosis books all in one place, and

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you know, kind of plan plan. Although I didn't have

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a lot of enthusiasm today to really start working and

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making more hips recordings on a variety of different issues

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and complaints. So but today I said I woke, I

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just didn't really, it wasn't really in the mood that

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I did do one. But that was a bit later on.

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It was a few hours ago. It's now nearly four

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o'clock on Wednesday. I know this is trivia Tuesday. I'm

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doing it Wednesday afternoon. I didn't have to tell you that,

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but it's true. I'm a little bit late. Oh yeah.

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The window. So what I could do is get some

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heavy duty noise reduction curtains would help a bit. Another

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thing I could do is to try and seal the

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window a little bit, just to you know, there's a

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certain thinking put on just to make sure that it

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makes the window. It just fits, fills in any gaps

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where sound might be coming through, because they're quite old windows,

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but they are I think they're double glazing. There might

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be single glazing. I think they're double glazing, so they're

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probably about twenty years old to the windows. And another

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thing I could probably do is I could get a blind,

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which could be inside because it's quite a big area

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where I can actually put stuff in, so a soundproofing

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blind that goes down because I can't have anything permanently

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on there. So if I put my books on there

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every time I wanted to do a recording, take me

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it's a lot of effort. Well, I'm not going to

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do it as simple as that because it's not practical

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because I can't leave them up there because it makes

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the room very stuffy because no air coming in. And

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when I'm not making recording, I like to have the

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windows open. I like to have air coming in, so

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even in the winter. So it needs to be like

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a temporary solution. Now, you know, ideally I'd like it

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to be perfect and to be completely zero sound. But

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at the same time, I don't think it really matters.

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It doesn't I don't. I mean, anyone that's used to

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listening to my recordings over the last twenty years or

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whatever it's been will know that there are two things.

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First of all, there's all this possibly the likelihood of

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a bit of background sound. It's never been perfect quality sound.

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The places I've lived over the years, there's a lot

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of you know, neighbors, and I've never been solitary in

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the middle of nowhere. What there's nothing going on is

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there's always been like neighbors close by. And the other

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thing is, yeah, I suppose that's it. Really, just that

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I it's never going to be completely silent, like they're

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yabbering on now, but I can hear it, but it's

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not loud. They're not shouting that they are speaking madly.

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They don't know how to speak quietly, but it's not

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that loud at the moment when I'm doing these recordings,

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and I said, anyone that's been listening to let me

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boy to sleep. Sometimes there's a good deal of background,

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neighbors chatting away and stuff, even maybe music in a

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neighbour's flat. Because if I just waited here for the

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ideal time to make a new recording, which I have

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done in the past, that's how I have kind of

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lived my life in the past, waiting for it to

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be quiet, and then I started recording, and I don't

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know when the noise is going to start again, and

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that that's not relaxing for me to be fair. So

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and also because I got Vinnie. Now, well I'm betting

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for BlimE me two years, two years, three years? How

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long have I had Ville for? Wow? Three years? In

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December three years he's lived with me in December, So

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what is it now? August, September, October, November, December. So

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literally in four months time, I have had him three

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whole years and he still doesn't like me. Mind, Do

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I challenge anyone to live with me? And like me?

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I think I'm not the easiest person to live with.

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I don't think. And he he's quite sensitive to outside sound.

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There's certain things he doesn't bark at anymore that he

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used to bark at. So when the dustman or dust

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people come and collect the garbage rubbish bags, he used

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to be all over that bark but like you know,

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because they're very noisy. I mean, to get that job,

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you have to actually probably do a shouting test before

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you can even get the job. So yeah, you know,

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I think in the job interview part of it is

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it's not just lifting stuff, but it's also you've got

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to shout continuously for the whole time you're working. And

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it's not just shouting, you've also got to include moaning

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about every aspect of the job and then also swearing

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lots as well. So that's part of the job in

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this country to do that kind of work. And it's

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in a contract. Vinnie used to bark at that. Now

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he doesn't care, never ever does he. Ever, he doesn't

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even wake up when they're side and they hear about

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seven thirty in the morning. Every every two weeks. He

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doesn't care, not bothered at all. So we got used

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to that. But if a neighbor closes the door, you bark,

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you know, something that happens much more regular than you know,

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that's only two weeks, every two weeks, and he's used

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to it. Something happens every single day. You're looking at

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my feet. Something happens every single day. That stirs him up. Weird,

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isn't it? And yes, so what I might do is

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so you know, it's also when I'm doing recordings, he

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starts barking, and it makes it a little bit harder

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because at the moment I can kind of zone out

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the drone, the droney conversations that's going on, So I

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can I can kind of zone that out because it's nothing,

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you know, it's nothing to do with me, and it's

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not doesn't apply to what I'm talking about. But when

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he starts barking, that's that's like I can't continue with

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the recording when he's doing that until he stops. And

235
00:19:28.880 --> 00:19:30.200
once he starts, it's a little.

236
00:19:30.039 --> 00:19:30.440
Bit like.

237
00:19:33.039 --> 00:19:36.359
You know, people are mo pets and they rev up

238
00:19:36.519 --> 00:19:41.839
and for some reason they can't stop revin. That's that's him.

239
00:19:42.279 --> 00:19:47.359
He's basically like a teenager on a motorbike. Can't stop

240
00:19:47.519 --> 00:19:50.640
reven It can't stop reving. It has to rev it

241
00:19:50.799 --> 00:19:54.720
really loud, and even when it gets quieter, it'll still

242
00:19:54.759 --> 00:19:57.200
revt a little bit. You know. It's kind of just

243
00:19:57.240 --> 00:20:01.400
can't He's just he can't not do it. He's a

244
00:20:01.440 --> 00:20:05.279
bit like that with his barking. Eventually it kind of

245
00:20:07.039 --> 00:20:16.359
pit us out a bit, you know. So I might

246
00:20:16.559 --> 00:20:21.079
try and look at get the curtains first, but you

247
00:20:21.079 --> 00:20:24.759
can get these plugs which actually fit into the window,

248
00:20:26.799 --> 00:20:30.680
which might be something that I'll look into doing. And

249
00:20:32.640 --> 00:20:36.279
I might go to the Diive store measure the windows first,

250
00:20:37.440 --> 00:20:39.759
because this doesn't look like something I'm going to be

251
00:20:39.759 --> 00:20:44.440
able to buy online. I mean I might be able to,

252
00:20:45.519 --> 00:20:47.920
but it might be something I have to save up

253
00:20:47.920 --> 00:20:50.400
for as well, because I don't think they're like super cheap,

254
00:20:52.079 --> 00:20:54.119
but it might be something that I'm going to need to,

255
00:20:57.279 --> 00:21:01.640
you know, get the correct size or something that will

256
00:21:01.680 --> 00:21:08.359
do a similar kind of thing. But I will I

257
00:21:08.400 --> 00:21:16.599
will reduce the outside bramble trying to think of a

258
00:21:16.640 --> 00:21:22.720
word for it, and then that will hopefully calm down

259
00:21:24.240 --> 00:21:27.440
and it'll be a bit more relaxing. But another thing

260
00:21:27.480 --> 00:21:29.799
I can do is go back to use the other microphone,

261
00:21:29.839 --> 00:21:34.359
which doesn't pick up much of the outside, which will

262
00:21:34.480 --> 00:21:40.319
mean because I'm thinking about moving, getting my table back out,

263
00:21:40.960 --> 00:21:47.079
putting it over near the books the bookshelves, and then

264
00:21:48.759 --> 00:21:58.880
using the yes, having the stuff on there. I'm not sure.

265
00:21:59.039 --> 00:22:01.960
We'll just see. I've even played with the idea of

266
00:22:02.000 --> 00:22:04.759
making videos a game, but I don't fancy that really.

267
00:22:09.720 --> 00:22:15.799
I just thought fancy it. So other than that, I

268
00:22:15.799 --> 00:22:19.839
can't think of anything else that's really going on. It's

269
00:22:19.920 --> 00:22:22.720
kind of weird really, because I've been so busy for

270
00:22:22.799 --> 00:22:28.640
the last seven weeks and then suddenly I'm back to

271
00:22:30.400 --> 00:22:38.319
not really having well, I don't have any commitments really.

272
00:22:38.480 --> 00:22:43.359
I mean, all my commitments kind of ended, you know,

273
00:22:43.480 --> 00:22:49.440
when Luke left back nearly two years ago. Other than Vinnie,

274
00:22:49.440 --> 00:22:51.880
but like as far as my day to day because

275
00:22:51.880 --> 00:22:54.319
I was kind of looking out for him and helping

276
00:22:54.400 --> 00:22:57.440
him out and you know, so that took quite a

277
00:22:57.480 --> 00:23:04.880
bit of my time. And then over the last year

278
00:23:05.160 --> 00:23:09.440
I've been involved with Uncle sausages, helping him with his flat,

279
00:23:09.559 --> 00:23:13.400
helping him with getting bills down and help you just

280
00:23:13.480 --> 00:23:17.200
little bits. But it's not being like super regular. It's

281
00:23:17.359 --> 00:23:20.240
like once a week maybe whevery a couple of weeks

282
00:23:20.480 --> 00:23:22.519
he'd asked me if I could help him with something,

283
00:23:23.480 --> 00:23:26.720
if I could order him something online and stuff like

284
00:23:26.759 --> 00:23:33.000
that that he didn't really feel comfortable doing himself. So

285
00:23:33.119 --> 00:23:36.119
I did that, but it wasn't like super regular. And

286
00:23:36.160 --> 00:23:37.839
then he was having his kitchen done, then he was

287
00:23:37.839 --> 00:23:41.920
having his bathroom done, and he had the flat other

288
00:23:41.960 --> 00:23:45.880
stuff done like at the end of last year, So

289
00:23:48.160 --> 00:23:52.640
that wasn't regular. It was just you know, as and when.

290
00:23:56.960 --> 00:24:04.960
But those seven weeks has been Yeah, it's very like

291
00:24:05.039 --> 00:24:13.920
the days are planned. Yeah. So and I'd get home

292
00:24:14.079 --> 00:24:17.359
and I was tired, and I just didn't really want

293
00:24:17.400 --> 00:24:19.240
to do anything when I got back, and I'll be

294
00:24:19.240 --> 00:24:22.400
going to bed early sometimes you know, six o'clock in

295
00:24:22.440 --> 00:24:29.920
the evening because I was so tired. So yes, it's

296
00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:33.440
weird now because this is the first week. I know,

297
00:24:33.480 --> 00:24:35.720
I had that week where I didn't get I couldn't

298
00:24:35.720 --> 00:24:41.400
go out because of COVID, But this week is the

299
00:24:41.400 --> 00:24:46.039
first week where I didn't. I kind of haven't got

300
00:24:46.079 --> 00:24:53.680
anything to worry about in a sense. I mean you

301
00:24:53.759 --> 00:24:55.319
might not notice about me. I'm a little bit of

302
00:24:55.319 --> 00:25:02.680
a worrier. Sometimes I'm very careful in some ways as well,

303
00:25:02.720 --> 00:25:06.319
you know, things like with Villy, I expect him to

304
00:25:06.400 --> 00:25:09.920
run into the road because that is something that he's done,

305
00:25:10.759 --> 00:25:12.640
even when he's on a lead I'm talking about, I

306
00:25:12.640 --> 00:25:15.400
don't let him off the lead. So I'm always kind

307
00:25:15.440 --> 00:25:20.559
of when I'm taking him out, I'm not just in

308
00:25:20.599 --> 00:25:25.359
my own world daydreaming, walking around, looking at the clouds

309
00:25:25.359 --> 00:25:30.960
and looking at the trees, and perhaps not as appreciative

310
00:25:31.039 --> 00:25:34.960
to being outdoors as perhaps it could be, because I've

311
00:25:34.960 --> 00:25:39.720
focused on him the whole time, making sure that he's okay,

312
00:25:39.799 --> 00:25:42.200
making sure he's not eating something weird off the floor,

313
00:25:43.319 --> 00:25:45.759
making sure that he's the right side of the pavements

314
00:25:45.839 --> 00:25:48.480
so he's not near the road. If there's a car coming,

315
00:25:48.720 --> 00:25:51.599
maybe we'll stop. Because there's always a lot of room

316
00:25:51.640 --> 00:25:59.240
for the cars to get past, and looking out for

317
00:25:59.319 --> 00:26:02.319
other dogs, make sure there's no dogs off the lead

318
00:26:02.440 --> 00:26:05.039
running towards us, you know, these little things like that.

319
00:26:09.279 --> 00:26:12.759
I guess I suppose I'm just an overprotective parent. I

320
00:26:12.799 --> 00:26:18.200
guess in a way, I don't know what kind of

321
00:26:18.240 --> 00:26:22.880
parent i'd have been. I think I would have been overprotective.

322
00:26:24.799 --> 00:26:27.839
I think, yeah, I think i've maybe you know, what

323
00:26:27.960 --> 00:26:30.640
is it to say, wrapping someone up in cotton wool

324
00:26:30.839 --> 00:26:35.440
that might have been me and that's possibly not might

325
00:26:35.480 --> 00:26:38.160
not have been a great great way to raise a kid.

326
00:26:39.599 --> 00:26:41.279
I don't know. I'm never going to know now on

327
00:26:41.279 --> 00:26:45.240
am I but I got this. I've raised two little boys.

328
00:26:45.319 --> 00:26:49.839
I've had Andrea and now Vinnie. And although Andrea was

329
00:26:49.880 --> 00:26:55.279
ten months old, he'll always be a baby. Vinnie is

330
00:26:55.440 --> 00:26:58.680
and Andre was. Did I say? Andre was only a few

331
00:26:58.680 --> 00:27:03.279
weeks old when I got him. So that's the thing

332
00:27:03.319 --> 00:27:07.799
about ferrets and little dogs. They're always always babies, even

333
00:27:07.839 --> 00:27:11.000
when they're old. Even when he's an old man, we'll

334
00:27:11.039 --> 00:27:14.680
both be old men together. We'll both be in our

335
00:27:14.759 --> 00:27:22.599
seventies at the same time, pretty much both. It's really

336
00:27:22.599 --> 00:27:25.839
weird because as we get older, he'll end up working

337
00:27:26.000 --> 00:27:29.440
probably the same speed that I am because I'm a

338
00:27:29.559 --> 00:27:36.000
very slow walker. I do not rush generally. I'm not

339
00:27:36.240 --> 00:27:44.319
how I can if I have to, but generally I don't. Plus,

340
00:27:44.400 --> 00:27:46.559
I've got these shoes at the moment, and I don't

341
00:27:46.599 --> 00:27:51.400
wear any socks with them. They're two big, they're the

342
00:27:51.519 --> 00:27:57.559
right size, they're size ten, but they slip a little bit,

343
00:27:59.039 --> 00:28:01.599
which did give me a blue when I first got them.

344
00:28:01.799 --> 00:28:09.759
Now it's fine, don't get all blisters. But I it's

345
00:28:09.880 --> 00:28:14.119
like I can't run because they'll fall off. I've tried

346
00:28:15.680 --> 00:28:19.000
and I end up like one shoe will end up

347
00:28:19.039 --> 00:28:22.640
with the other side of the road. So that's not ideal.

348
00:28:25.160 --> 00:28:28.440
So the other day there was a bus and it

349
00:28:28.480 --> 00:28:31.599
was pulling off and actually it wasn't you know what,

350
00:28:31.880 --> 00:28:34.319
you're waiting for a bus or you're not waiting, but

351
00:28:34.599 --> 00:28:37.640
you're going to that. My voice is still a bit croaky,

352
00:28:37.680 --> 00:28:43.039
isn't it from the old COVID But it's okay, maybe

353
00:28:43.039 --> 00:28:46.480
that's just my voice. Now as I'm getting older, my

354
00:28:46.759 --> 00:28:51.839
voice is getting very very deep and okay, just to do

355
00:28:51.920 --> 00:28:54.799
this what I like to do when I've got croaky voice.

356
00:28:55.759 --> 00:29:07.880
Oh was born star. See when I first started doing

357
00:29:07.920 --> 00:29:13.640
these recordings back in two thousand and six, if you listen,

358
00:29:13.640 --> 00:29:16.160
if you go on YouTube, I actually have some old

359
00:29:16.319 --> 00:29:20.400
videos on there from I think probably about two thousand

360
00:29:20.400 --> 00:29:24.960
and seven. They're black and white, okay, and you can

361
00:29:25.000 --> 00:29:25.400
hear me.

362
00:29:25.480 --> 00:29:31.880
And I'm like this, Hello, welcome to www dot Jasonnewland

363
00:29:32.039 --> 00:29:37.319
dot com. Well, I think it was Jasonnewland dot com.

364
00:29:37.400 --> 00:29:40.680
And I was thirty five years old or thirty six

365
00:29:40.759 --> 00:29:48.319
years old, and I had hair. It was dark hair

366
00:29:49.640 --> 00:29:51.720
I had. I don't think I even had a beard,

367
00:29:52.920 --> 00:29:55.079
but when I did have a beard, it was dark

368
00:29:55.160 --> 00:29:57.960
hair on the beard as well, a little bit of

369
00:29:58.000 --> 00:30:01.599
gray kind of just a little bit of the front,

370
00:30:01.759 --> 00:30:03.960
a little bit of the bat of the side rather

371
00:30:04.400 --> 00:30:10.039
but very minimal. And because what happened is basically I

372
00:30:10.240 --> 00:30:16.000
was part ginger, so I'm forty eight percent of Irish,

373
00:30:16.000 --> 00:30:20.160
you know, So I was part ginger my hair, so

374
00:30:20.319 --> 00:30:26.680
I was brown hair plus ginger, and it showed more

375
00:30:26.759 --> 00:30:30.319
in my beard. I had a ginger beard. It was

376
00:30:30.400 --> 00:30:35.359
kind of semi ginger brown. The parts that were proper

377
00:30:36.119 --> 00:30:41.119
proper ginger were the sides, like the chin area, not

378
00:30:41.279 --> 00:30:43.160
in the middle of the chin, but the sides of

379
00:30:43.240 --> 00:30:48.119
the chin. Does that make sense. So that bit and

380
00:30:48.200 --> 00:30:51.039
probably the mustache kind of part, and other parts of

381
00:30:51.079 --> 00:30:55.240
the bed they were ginger, and the front of my

382
00:30:55.319 --> 00:31:00.000
hair with ginger, and the sides of my hair was ginger.

383
00:31:01.359 --> 00:31:06.799
They went gray first. So if you ever see someone

384
00:31:07.039 --> 00:31:12.519
in the fifties who's ginger, they're dyeing their hair, they

385
00:31:12.519 --> 00:31:18.799
should be gray. Can you imagine what a conundrum? So

386
00:31:18.880 --> 00:31:22.359
your ginger, You've got ginger hair and you start to

387
00:31:22.359 --> 00:31:27.119
go gray. Do you let it go gray or do

388
00:31:27.160 --> 00:31:33.119
you actually dye ginger? That's like, it's like, how can

389
00:31:33.160 --> 00:31:38.880
you choose between the two. I could make funny because

390
00:31:38.880 --> 00:31:42.640
I'm part ginger, I'm part ginger. I am I was

391
00:31:42.799 --> 00:31:48.599
not anymore even you know, on pointing, you probably guess

392
00:31:48.640 --> 00:31:56.839
where I'm pointing. Yeah, same thing there as well. Yep, ginger.

393
00:31:59.400 --> 00:32:02.799
I know we're supposed to say red hair. I did

394
00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:05.000
never read hair ginger hair. I did never read hair.

395
00:32:05.839 --> 00:32:10.720
It wasn't it was ginger. And I've never been prejudiced

396
00:32:10.720 --> 00:32:14.079
against ginger people. I don't. I don't think anyone really

397
00:32:14.160 --> 00:32:20.440
is kind of one of those silly, silly things which

398
00:32:20.480 --> 00:32:22.920
would be annoying if you was ginger and people make

399
00:32:23.000 --> 00:32:25.960
fun of you. Yeah, any you make fun of. If

400
00:32:25.960 --> 00:32:28.240
anyone's making funny of you for anything, they keep going

401
00:32:28.279 --> 00:32:31.200
on and on about it. It's annoying. It's like when

402
00:32:31.200 --> 00:32:35.000
I was at school, or it's super handsome Jason, super

403
00:32:35.039 --> 00:32:37.960
sexy jj and it got a bit annoying after a while.

404
00:32:39.319 --> 00:32:41.279
That was just the teachers b b B B b

405
00:32:41.279 --> 00:32:48.119
b b b b b b BPEP. And I dated

406
00:32:48.240 --> 00:32:53.559
lots of ginger girls or females with ginger hair, like

407
00:32:54.759 --> 00:33:10.279
how many, I don't know, one, two, three, four, five, six, six,

408
00:33:10.799 --> 00:33:17.599
maybe more than six, at least six six six, six

409
00:33:17.720 --> 00:33:23.799
six six six, yeah, one two three, yeah, at least

410
00:33:23.880 --> 00:33:25.119
six maybe more.

411
00:33:31.039 --> 00:33:31.200
Yeah.

412
00:33:31.240 --> 00:33:33.640
I actually dated someone and they had ginger hair, but

413
00:33:33.680 --> 00:33:39.559
they for some reason, she dyed her hair red. I

414
00:33:39.559 --> 00:33:41.599
remember it came home. While it came home, we didn't

415
00:33:41.640 --> 00:33:45.559
live together, but I, you know, went around her house

416
00:33:46.799 --> 00:33:48.839
and she owned the door, and she had red hair,

417
00:33:49.160 --> 00:33:56.319
and I thought why. I didn't really understand why. It

418
00:33:56.480 --> 00:34:01.759
wasn't really red. It's like she died ahead ginger, but

419
00:34:01.880 --> 00:34:06.759
she had ginger hair, but it wasn't. It was kind

420
00:34:06.799 --> 00:34:10.840
of mild ginger. I was going to say, more palatable. No,

421
00:34:11.039 --> 00:34:15.000
I don't mean it like that. It was it was

422
00:34:15.519 --> 00:34:20.239
like milder. It wasn't quite as because I've dated people

423
00:34:20.440 --> 00:34:26.519
that have had ginger hair, like you know, ginger hair

424
00:34:27.480 --> 00:34:31.719
or red hair like reddish hair, and people have had

425
00:34:31.760 --> 00:34:36.360
like proper full of ginger is ginger, And I've dated

426
00:34:36.880 --> 00:34:39.599
people like that. And I'll give you an idea of

427
00:34:39.639 --> 00:34:43.159
my family. Ginger is in my family. And it might

428
00:34:43.199 --> 00:34:44.920
be thinking just gives you had a little bit ginger

429
00:34:44.960 --> 00:34:48.079
in your beard and your pubes, doesn't You didn't say

430
00:34:48.519 --> 00:34:51.920
you can't say stuff like that. Sorry, can't say anything.

431
00:34:52.679 --> 00:35:02.360
What beard. No, I've got one, two, three, at least

432
00:35:02.440 --> 00:35:10.400
three of my cousins have had ginger kids. That was

433
00:35:10.559 --> 00:35:15.800
a that's a strong gene. Yeah, so that's three. And

434
00:35:15.880 --> 00:35:18.239
I think one of them's got two ginger kids. Everyone's

435
00:35:18.280 --> 00:35:23.559
got I think two, another one's got one. That's just

436
00:35:23.599 --> 00:35:26.519
the ones I know about. And I think my mum,

437
00:35:26.719 --> 00:35:31.159
my grandmother had I think at least one ginger sibling.

438
00:35:32.000 --> 00:35:32.119
Thing.

439
00:35:32.159 --> 00:35:37.639
It's either I think a daughter, sister, I think, And so, yeah,

440
00:35:37.719 --> 00:35:43.039
the ginger jean is strong within my the his is

441
00:35:43.119 --> 00:35:47.159
strong within me. So if I had if I'd reproduced,

442
00:35:47.719 --> 00:35:55.920
I might have had a ginger kid. So I don't

443
00:35:55.920 --> 00:36:01.159
know how I moved from soundproofd curtains to ginger kids,

444
00:36:01.199 --> 00:36:05.079
I don't know, but yeah, the ginger jeene is strong

445
00:36:05.320 --> 00:36:14.119
within the family and prostate issues. But hey, there's nothing

446
00:36:14.159 --> 00:36:30.519
I can do about that. Yeah right, classic, Okay, so

447
00:36:30.639 --> 00:36:36.159
these are ridiculous things. Vinny's barking. Now stop that. So

448
00:36:36.280 --> 00:36:42.000
we've got inventions that solved no problem at all. So

449
00:36:42.159 --> 00:36:49.320
the first one is a pet rock. A pet rock,

450
00:36:51.039 --> 00:36:53.360
not a stick of rock that you would eat, that

451
00:36:53.400 --> 00:36:56.159
you'd buy a seaside town. I don't know if you

452
00:36:56.199 --> 00:36:59.159
had them in your country, but we have these sticks

453
00:36:59.159 --> 00:37:04.119
of rocks in like Blackpool or I guess any seaside

454
00:37:04.159 --> 00:37:07.880
town really in England or in the UK where they'd

455
00:37:07.920 --> 00:37:11.480
have maybe the it'd be a stick of rock. It'd

456
00:37:11.480 --> 00:37:14.519
be very sticky, and it'd be mean. It's a stick,

457
00:37:14.599 --> 00:37:16.840
but it's not called stick because it's sticky. It's called

458
00:37:16.840 --> 00:37:20.559
a stick because it's long and it gets stuck in

459
00:37:20.599 --> 00:37:24.239
between your teeth. You can get mint ones, which are

460
00:37:24.239 --> 00:37:28.440
probably the better ones if you want to suck on them,

461
00:37:28.719 --> 00:37:31.960
and they have sometimes they have like the name of

462
00:37:32.000 --> 00:37:37.199
the place, let's say Blackpool for example, goes all the

463
00:37:37.199 --> 00:37:39.039
way through the rock, so you can see the word

464
00:37:39.079 --> 00:37:45.079
blackpool just in case you forget where you are, But

465
00:37:45.440 --> 00:37:49.719
not that kind of rock. Pet rocks sold in the

466
00:37:49.800 --> 00:37:55.320
nineteen seventies with known moving parts or life yet sold

467
00:37:55.400 --> 00:37:59.880
millions for its novelty alone. So basically just a rock,

468
00:38:00.639 --> 00:38:06.840
a rock that you'd find on the floor in a

469
00:38:07.039 --> 00:38:12.559
rocky place. We don't really have rocks where I live.

470
00:38:13.960 --> 00:38:18.840
There's bricks, but they're usually attached to a wall. Although

471
00:38:18.840 --> 00:38:23.079
there is an alleyway up the road and it's got

472
00:38:23.119 --> 00:38:29.519
this wall that's just continuously losing its bricks and then

473
00:38:29.559 --> 00:38:31.599
the bricks go back onto the wall, and then the

474
00:38:31.599 --> 00:38:33.599
bricks were on the floor again a few days later.

475
00:38:34.079 --> 00:38:41.519
I don't know what that's about. So that's the first one.

476
00:38:42.239 --> 00:38:45.159
I have got these facts checked. So it doesn't mean

477
00:38:45.199 --> 00:38:49.760
that they're correct or they're right, but you know, so

478
00:38:49.800 --> 00:38:53.840
don't get into arguments with people about using these is well,

479
00:38:53.880 --> 00:38:57.679
I know for a fact that rocks were kept as

480
00:38:57.719 --> 00:39:01.199
pets in the seventies. I know I'm going to argue

481
00:39:01.360 --> 00:39:05.159
for an hour and thirteen minutes. No, you don't need

482
00:39:05.199 --> 00:39:11.440
to do. That might be a lie. Number two, USB

483
00:39:11.960 --> 00:39:21.599
pet rock WA USB pet rock A rock a rock

484
00:39:21.880 --> 00:39:27.679
attached to a USB cable okay, which is something you

485
00:39:27.719 --> 00:39:31.760
plug your phone into to charge it, a USB cable.

486
00:39:32.400 --> 00:39:41.440
It does absolutely nothing other than occupy a port. What's

487
00:39:41.480 --> 00:39:44.239
the point in it? Then? Oh, yeah, there's a pointless

488
00:39:44.239 --> 00:39:49.320
and they I suppose and then mind Number three diet

489
00:39:49.559 --> 00:39:56.679
water and marketed in Japan as calorie three weight loss water,

490
00:39:57.639 --> 00:40:05.239
when water already has zero CA calories. I don't know

491
00:40:05.280 --> 00:40:11.280
what to say about that other than it sounds like

492
00:40:11.320 --> 00:40:15.559
something that I'd probably buy, which is ridiculous. I don't know,

493
00:40:15.840 --> 00:40:19.239
I don't know, I don't, I can't, I don't know why,

494
00:40:19.280 --> 00:40:32.559
I don't I know. Diet water, DVD rewinder. I've thought

495
00:40:32.599 --> 00:40:34.480
it for a second. That's a good idea. What stuff?

496
00:40:34.679 --> 00:40:39.079
But no, it's a DVD rewinder. They don't need rewinding

497
00:40:41.320 --> 00:40:50.639
device for rewinding DVDs. Do these really exist? Number five

498
00:40:50.920 --> 00:40:58.199
is a banana slicer, a tool that slices bananas, which

499
00:40:58.239 --> 00:41:03.679
you could do easily with knife. I don't know that

500
00:41:03.800 --> 00:41:06.639
sounds like quite a good idea, because wouldn't a banana

501
00:41:06.719 --> 00:41:11.079
slice to just be a very similar thing to a

502
00:41:11.239 --> 00:41:21.000
potato peeler. I'm just thinking, especially if he was making

503
00:41:21.159 --> 00:41:25.320
things like what would you be doing with a banana,

504
00:41:25.559 --> 00:41:29.440
maybe making ice cream Sundays and stuff like that.

505
00:41:31.920 --> 00:41:32.079
Right.

506
00:41:32.199 --> 00:41:41.760
Number six is a goldfish walker, a water tank on

507
00:41:42.159 --> 00:41:53.519
wheels to walk your fish outside. That's a weird visual,

508
00:41:53.559 --> 00:42:00.480
isn't it. I can't see that is necessarily ridiculous of mind.

509
00:42:00.480 --> 00:42:03.440
I used to take a ferret out for walk. I've

510
00:42:03.440 --> 00:42:06.960
seen people take cats for walks. I saw someone take

511
00:42:07.000 --> 00:42:11.239
a parrot for a walk in town. Here's me with

512
00:42:11.360 --> 00:42:14.400
Andre thinking I was I was the weird one with

513
00:42:14.519 --> 00:42:27.360
the ferret, and she pulls out a parrot from a suitcase. Wow.

514
00:42:27.599 --> 00:42:34.639
Number seven have aubrella, a drone mounted mini umbrella follow

515
00:42:37.360 --> 00:42:42.320
Oh dear a drone mounted and mounted mini umbrella following

516
00:42:42.480 --> 00:42:49.320
you around so you don't carry one. I mean that's yeah,

517
00:42:49.840 --> 00:42:53.159
it's a bit lazy, isn't it. Mind you umbrellas are

518
00:42:53.159 --> 00:43:00.400
a bit annoying to carry around because I think, I mean,

519
00:43:00.440 --> 00:43:03.800
how many umbrellas have you lost in your lifetime? I've

520
00:43:03.840 --> 00:43:08.719
lost a few. So maybe some kind of alarm on

521
00:43:08.800 --> 00:43:13.880
an umbrella so when you get more than ten foot away,

522
00:43:15.119 --> 00:43:19.159
it beeps, so you have to go back and get it.

523
00:43:20.719 --> 00:43:23.360
So that would be a good idea. I think I

524
00:43:23.440 --> 00:43:27.599
might just create an invention that could make someone millions.

525
00:43:28.079 --> 00:43:30.599
If you do take up that invention and you create it,

526
00:43:30.639 --> 00:43:33.440
which I imagine it'd be quite easy to do, please

527
00:43:33.800 --> 00:43:37.519
give me a percentage, Thank you very much. Number eight

528
00:43:38.000 --> 00:43:45.519
fur roller applies fake pet hair to your clothes so

529
00:43:46.440 --> 00:43:56.440
people think you own a dog. So people that own

530
00:43:56.440 --> 00:44:01.039
a dog do not want to walk around with dog

531
00:44:01.159 --> 00:44:08.440
hairs all over their clothes. The people that don't own

532
00:44:08.480 --> 00:44:13.280
dogs want to have dog hairs on their clothes. Really,

533
00:44:14.159 --> 00:44:19.920
really a fur roller? Blimey?

534
00:44:21.679 --> 00:44:21.880
Right?

535
00:44:22.400 --> 00:44:30.280
Sobbing spectacles glasses were built in sponges to collect tears.

536
00:44:32.280 --> 00:44:41.559
I suppose if you was, I don't know, if a

537
00:44:41.599 --> 00:44:49.519
particularly emotional person maybe, or diceing up onions, that'd be

538
00:44:49.599 --> 00:44:59.000
quite good, wouldn't it to collect tears? Okay? Finger beanies

539
00:45:00.519 --> 00:45:09.519
tiny beanies for each fingertip? That's just uh would you

540
00:45:09.559 --> 00:45:15.679
go for that? Tiny beanies for each fingertip? And I

541
00:45:15.760 --> 00:45:20.840
kind of want to check that one out. Sorry, finger beanies,

542
00:45:29.119 --> 00:45:36.440
My goodness, I just got a picture of it and

543
00:45:41.639 --> 00:45:48.400
it's it's funny. I'm sorry, it's a funny, funny, funny. Wow,

544
00:45:51.920 --> 00:45:56.320
it's literally this product is not a toy, only used

545
00:45:56.599 --> 00:46:04.239
and he uses a decoration mini knitted hand Croatians, And

546
00:46:04.320 --> 00:46:07.760
there's a picture of a person's hand with a on

547
00:46:07.840 --> 00:46:12.280
their little finger. There's a yellow, little yellow hat. Then

548
00:46:12.280 --> 00:46:14.800
there's a blue hat, pink hat, white hat, and on

549
00:46:14.880 --> 00:46:20.079
the fun it's a little brown hat. Oh dear, So

550
00:46:20.199 --> 00:46:28.159
they do actually exist. Number eleven. Avocado on a stick,

551
00:46:29.320 --> 00:46:35.280
an avocado product on a stick. Okay, I don't know

552
00:46:36.239 --> 00:46:40.320
what that would be about. That might be useful. I mean,

553
00:46:40.360 --> 00:46:43.800
if you get you get sweet corn on a stick.

554
00:46:45.119 --> 00:46:47.320
I'm I'm sure there was a time when people fought

555
00:46:47.559 --> 00:46:49.960
sweet corn. Why would you have sweet corn on a stick.

556
00:46:51.119 --> 00:46:54.920
But it's quite makes it easier to eat, don't it.

557
00:46:55.000 --> 00:46:59.199
So maybe maybe that's what the avocado on sticks about.

558
00:47:02.400 --> 00:47:10.239
Century charger. Century charger a one hundred foot long iPhone cable.

559
00:47:15.639 --> 00:47:18.880
I mean, it depends how far away you are, doesn't it.

560
00:47:19.599 --> 00:47:25.199
Because if you're one hundred foot away and you need

561
00:47:25.679 --> 00:47:32.559
the iPhone to be charged, you know, I mean, there's

562
00:47:32.599 --> 00:47:36.760
no there's no rules about how far you need to

563
00:47:36.800 --> 00:47:47.880
be away in order to charge your phone. Surely one

564
00:47:47.960 --> 00:47:51.880
hundred foot seems like a long way, and I do

565
00:47:52.440 --> 00:47:55.760
believe it might be wrong. But the longer the lead,

566
00:47:56.079 --> 00:48:05.719
the less the less fast the energy or the electricity travels.

567
00:48:06.119 --> 00:48:10.400
But again I might be wrong on that. One. Number

568
00:48:10.400 --> 00:48:15.559
thirteen is cuisine. Okay, whistle say that quisique. I did

569
00:48:15.599 --> 00:48:21.559
it twice. Quiz. Cuisine curtain a cloth that hangs over

570
00:48:21.599 --> 00:48:23.840
your nose to let you eat improvacy.

571
00:48:28.559 --> 00:48:34.199
Oh wow, I got to look this up as well.

572
00:48:34.239 --> 00:48:41.559
I'm sorry this is I can't not so cuisine cusy

573
00:48:42.760 --> 00:48:54.239
curtain A cuisine Oh my goodness, there's got one that

574
00:48:54.360 --> 00:48:58.039
actually attaches to the inside the nose, so I could

575
00:48:58.159 --> 00:49:01.119
just hang down from the nose while you eat your dinner,

576
00:49:03.679 --> 00:49:07.800
a bit like those false mustaches I used to have

577
00:49:08.039 --> 00:49:10.480
in the Christmas crackers when I was a kid. I

578
00:49:10.599 --> 00:49:15.280
was a little almost like Adolf Hitler mustaches and put

579
00:49:15.280 --> 00:49:19.360
it in your nostrils and it'd be quite a bit prickly,

580
00:49:19.400 --> 00:49:24.239
but it was fun, I suppose. But it's one of them,

581
00:49:25.039 --> 00:49:34.800
but with a like a little curtain. I I ah, ah,

582
00:49:36.079 --> 00:49:39.000
fair enough, cuisine curtain.

583
00:49:39.360 --> 00:49:39.880
I mean.

584
00:49:42.480 --> 00:49:46.880
Yeah, I mean I'm not a big fan of eating

585
00:49:47.119 --> 00:49:52.039
in front of other people because I sometimes can be

586
00:49:52.039 --> 00:49:54.559
a little bit of a messy eater. And when I

587
00:49:54.599 --> 00:49:59.679
say sometimes, I don't think I've ever eaten where the

588
00:49:59.719 --> 00:50:04.320
stuff hasn't gone on my top. I mean you should

589
00:50:04.320 --> 00:50:07.039
see me eat sausage, roll on the on the on

590
00:50:07.119 --> 00:50:12.920
the bus and wow, it's it is everywhere. It's everywhere.

591
00:50:16.320 --> 00:50:25.519
Sub stub stoppers tiny hard hats for your toes. M

592
00:50:29.840 --> 00:50:32.239
I can't, I can't not. It's the I want to

593
00:50:32.239 --> 00:50:35.039
see the image, that's what it is. I need to

594
00:50:35.119 --> 00:50:47.360
see the image. Stub stoppers images. They shaped its little hats.

595
00:50:48.400 --> 00:50:50.519
Do you know the hard hats, the yellow hard hats

596
00:50:50.559 --> 00:50:58.599
you see building people where look like them that go

597
00:50:58.719 --> 00:51:07.880
on the toes. Wow, that is brilliant. Very happy with that.

598
00:51:10.480 --> 00:51:13.639
Now know what to get my dad for Christmas? So

599
00:51:14.400 --> 00:51:22.320
number fifteen chip extractor a suction tube to pull the

600
00:51:22.400 --> 00:51:28.119
last chip from the bottom of a pringles can. A

601
00:51:28.239 --> 00:51:31.960
suction tube to put that doesn't sound that seems like

602
00:51:32.039 --> 00:51:34.760
quite a good idea. Actually, mind you could just turn

603
00:51:34.840 --> 00:51:38.000
it upside down and I know sometimes you get a

604
00:51:38.000 --> 00:51:44.400
little bit jammed. You could just like tap it. But

605
00:51:44.639 --> 00:51:49.519
a suction tube. I feel I need to look at

606
00:51:49.519 --> 00:51:55.199
this one as well. Oh, there's an ice cream van

607
00:51:57.280 --> 00:52:07.559
paste chip extractor thee it's bigger than the tuber pringles Honestly,

608
00:52:07.639 --> 00:52:12.400
it's a massive thing. Just to be fair, I don't

609
00:52:12.400 --> 00:52:19.360
think it's probably just four extracting the last one. You

610
00:52:19.400 --> 00:52:22.480
could probably use it for all of them, you know,

611
00:52:23.679 --> 00:52:25.920
so you could just it's just a lazy way to

612
00:52:26.840 --> 00:52:29.840
eat your or We don't call them chips in this country.

613
00:52:29.920 --> 00:52:34.280
We call them crisps. But you can get your crisp

614
00:52:34.400 --> 00:52:36.719
out the packet. You could probably use it for more

615
00:52:36.760 --> 00:52:40.920
than just pringles. Use it for what's it's monster munch.

616
00:52:41.440 --> 00:52:45.960
If it's got a good suction on it, it's like

617
00:52:46.000 --> 00:52:48.760
a it's like a gun, basically like a big gun.

618
00:52:51.559 --> 00:52:56.320
Number sixteen. Mixer mask a mask that doubles as a

619
00:52:56.320 --> 00:53:02.199
beer receptacle. So again I'm going to have to look

620
00:53:02.239 --> 00:53:07.280
at this one. I didn't don't quite understand from the description.

621
00:53:10.719 --> 00:53:28.280
If some a look, oh wow, wow wow.

622
00:53:29.000 --> 00:53:34.760
Okay, So a mixer mask is basically it's like a

623
00:53:34.800 --> 00:53:37.920
surgical mask that we used to have to wear a

624
00:53:37.920 --> 00:53:42.360
few years back. But in the front of it is

625
00:53:42.679 --> 00:53:49.320
a sea through packet full of drink, which I measure

626
00:53:49.360 --> 00:53:53.400
you've got some kind of suction thing that you can

627
00:53:54.199 --> 00:53:58.440
It doesn't show how it works. Let's see if I

628
00:53:58.519 --> 00:54:05.280
can get Oh it's not let me okay, I thought

629
00:54:05.280 --> 00:54:07.360
it might be interesting to see how that one works.

630
00:54:07.760 --> 00:54:11.599
Never mind, but yeah, it's it's basically you can drink.

631
00:54:12.280 --> 00:54:14.039
I guess it's kind of like a dummy thing where

632
00:54:14.079 --> 00:54:16.800
you can drink out of it while you're walking around.

633
00:54:18.880 --> 00:54:22.719
I don't know. It's probably like another version of those

634
00:54:22.880 --> 00:54:26.360
hats that you have, you know, with straws and stuff

635
00:54:26.400 --> 00:54:31.760
that you can put drinks in, except these ones look

636
00:54:31.880 --> 00:54:41.599
really silly. Number seventeen belt bubble wrap popper, belt bubble

637
00:54:41.599 --> 00:54:46.039
wrap popper, A buckle that pops bubble rap in real

638
00:54:46.119 --> 00:54:55.480
time as you walk. Oh god, this is I just

639
00:54:55.519 --> 00:54:58.360
want to see I need to see these. I just

640
00:54:58.400 --> 00:55:01.840
need to see them. Can't help it, Sorry, I have

641
00:55:01.920 --> 00:55:05.280
to see them. I'm getting the idea what it is,

642
00:55:05.320 --> 00:55:12.079
but it just doesn't. But it belt bubble wrap popper.

643
00:55:13.920 --> 00:55:21.920
Oh okay, here it is, right. It's basically it's these

644
00:55:22.400 --> 00:55:28.400
two wheels. It's to two things which it attaches to

645
00:55:28.480 --> 00:55:31.480
the front of your belt. Has probably got a special belt,

646
00:55:31.920 --> 00:55:36.760
so is that it's the fun right? Okay, the front

647
00:55:36.800 --> 00:55:41.239
of your belt, the buckle would be and you put

648
00:55:41.280 --> 00:55:43.639
the bubber wrap through it and you just turn it

649
00:55:43.679 --> 00:55:55.480
as you walk and it makes the popping sounds. Right,

650
00:55:56.559 --> 00:56:07.000
It's that is a strange one. Pogo copter. Pogo copter,

651
00:56:07.400 --> 00:56:12.840
pogo stick with propeller blades guaranteed to fling you into

652
00:56:12.880 --> 00:56:19.920
the air briefly, pogo stick with propeller blades. This this

653
00:56:20.000 --> 00:56:22.159
looks quite good because I used to have a pogo Well,

654
00:56:22.199 --> 00:56:23.760
I used to play on a pogo stick when I

655
00:56:23.800 --> 00:56:26.480
was a kid. I don't think I had one myself,

656
00:56:26.519 --> 00:56:28.800
but I used to play on one because you know,

657
00:56:28.840 --> 00:56:32.880
I had friends I had one. I might I don't

658
00:56:32.880 --> 00:56:36.679
think I had one myself. I might have done so

659
00:56:37.519 --> 00:56:49.760
a pogo copter. T See this doesn't pogo copter. No,

660
00:56:51.559 --> 00:56:56.440
this doesn't. This doesn't. Yes, there is no proper ultra

661
00:56:56.440 --> 00:57:08.559
efficient flying pogo robot. Pogo copter. Let's have a look.

662
00:57:09.199 --> 00:57:18.599
And nineteen ninety one no missiles what okay? Apparently it's

663
00:57:18.679 --> 00:57:20.159
just I think it would push you up a little

664
00:57:20.159 --> 00:57:23.960
bit more than a normal poco stick, which sounds like

665
00:57:23.960 --> 00:57:28.639
a good invention to me. Helmet mounted pistol are gun

666
00:57:28.639 --> 00:57:35.280
attached to a hard hat, triggered by blowing into a tube.

667
00:57:37.239 --> 00:57:43.719
I mean technically, you know, it gives it kind of

668
00:57:43.880 --> 00:57:51.280
equals things out, allows people that maybe don't have all

669
00:57:51.360 --> 00:57:55.840
of their physical movement to defend themselves. So there's you know,

670
00:57:55.880 --> 00:58:09.159
it's not necessarily a silly invention. Yeah, oh my goodness,

671
00:58:09.199 --> 00:58:21.679
I've just seen a picture of it. Yeah, it's I

672
00:58:21.760 --> 00:58:27.719
suppose if Stephen Hawkins was to make a deaf Wish movie,

673
00:58:28.280 --> 00:58:30.559
I know, obviously you'd have to come back, But if

674
00:58:30.559 --> 00:58:32.800
it was to make a deaf Wish movie where it

675
00:58:32.840 --> 00:58:37.840
was a vigilante, then I suppose they could use that

676
00:58:37.960 --> 00:58:46.280
invention for him. But yeah, that's this weird invention. High

677
00:58:46.320 --> 00:58:52.239
speed track trainer. A running cart pulled behind a car?

678
00:58:54.639 --> 00:59:01.199
A running cart pulled behind a car? Does that make

679
00:59:01.280 --> 00:59:04.920
sense to me? Does it make sense to you? I

680
00:59:04.960 --> 00:59:10.119
don't know. I can't. I just have to look at

681
00:59:10.119 --> 00:59:15.599
this one as well. I'd not do it. I did not. No,

682
00:59:15.840 --> 00:59:21.719
doesn't have anything. No, I'm guessing this one wasn't invented.

683
00:59:22.639 --> 00:59:34.719
High speed track trainer. No, so I don't know. I

684
00:59:34.719 --> 00:59:37.440
don't know. Does that make sense? A running cart pulled

685
00:59:37.480 --> 00:59:42.039
behind a car? Risky exercise at best, he says, there,

686
00:59:42.079 --> 00:59:46.159
but that's just adding its own jokes. But next one's

687
00:59:46.280 --> 00:59:51.440
missing eyeglasses. Mirrors reflect a single eye to simulate wearing

688
00:59:51.480 --> 01:00:03.440
two eyes. Wearing two eyes, Okay, so that what what

689
01:00:03.480 --> 01:00:07.599
does that mean to someone maybe that's got only one

690
01:00:07.639 --> 01:00:12.199
eye it it's like it has a fake eye on

691
01:00:12.280 --> 01:00:16.800
it perhaps, which sounds to me like a really good invention.

692
01:00:16.920 --> 01:00:23.719
Actually it's going to say anything weird in it? Why

693
01:00:23.760 --> 01:00:28.639
is that a strange invention? Mirrors reflect a single eye

694
01:00:28.719 --> 01:00:37.360
to stimulate to simulate wearing two eyes. I don't know

695
01:00:37.400 --> 01:00:42.719
that that doesn't sound like a does sound like stranger? All?

696
01:00:42.880 --> 01:00:45.199
Maybe I'm maybe I'm being weird, but.

697
01:00:46.800 --> 01:00:47.119
Hmmm.

698
01:00:48.159 --> 01:00:55.280
Air bag undershorts so an inflatable underwear. Inflatable underwear that

699
01:00:55.360 --> 01:01:02.320
deploys if you fall. Yeah, brilliant. I like that, and

700
01:01:02.440 --> 01:01:07.440
that to these to me, I'm not silly inventions. I'm

701
01:01:07.480 --> 01:01:10.599
not saying that i'd want them, but I'd definitely like

702
01:01:10.679 --> 01:01:14.679
to see them in action. I'd like to see So

703
01:01:15.719 --> 01:01:18.239
I've seen a few people fall od I've just seen

704
01:01:18.280 --> 01:01:30.599
an image of them. Wow, okay, right, so yeah this,

705
01:01:34.440 --> 01:01:39.719
yeah some of them. Yeah, I'm not sure how how

706
01:01:39.760 --> 01:01:41.960
fi you'd have to fall for them to kind of inflate,

707
01:01:42.719 --> 01:01:50.760
because if you fall, like if it's yeah, if you

708
01:01:50.920 --> 01:01:53.920
was falling from a height, then you know I could

709
01:01:53.960 --> 01:02:01.000
save your life, couldn't it. But I think most falls

710
01:02:01.000 --> 01:02:05.159
are just like small falls that I mean four and

711
01:02:05.199 --> 01:02:07.280
nova can still obviously cause a lot of problems. But

712
01:02:08.719 --> 01:02:11.559
I don't know if that's enough time. Because you don't parachutes,

713
01:02:11.840 --> 01:02:14.480
there's a certain height they have to be at before

714
01:02:14.519 --> 01:02:19.840
they can be opened in order to land safely. I

715
01:02:19.880 --> 01:02:21.719
don't quite know what that is because I'm not an

716
01:02:21.760 --> 01:02:26.639
expert on anything, but I know there's there's a certain

717
01:02:26.800 --> 01:02:32.639
you can't open parachutes after a certain height and land safely,

718
01:02:34.480 --> 01:02:37.519
And I'm wondering whether that works the same for airbags.

719
01:02:37.880 --> 01:02:42.480
Maybe they only work if you're above six foot above

720
01:02:42.559 --> 01:02:46.960
the ground, like maybe there's a warden on it. You

721
01:02:47.039 --> 01:02:50.280
must be in a tree for these to work. Maybe

722
01:02:53.519 --> 01:02:55.639
the next one this is this is what it says,

723
01:02:55.639 --> 01:02:57.480
so I'm not gonna I'm not gonna not say it,

724
01:02:57.519 --> 01:03:02.360
but it says penis exercise as a device a bar,

725
01:03:06.880 --> 01:03:22.519
a bar pushing device supposedly four female strength. Okay, if

726
01:03:22.519 --> 01:03:24.519
I put this in it, it won't come up anyway, because

727
01:03:25.960 --> 01:03:34.440
oh it does. Okay, it looks like a catapult. Away

728
01:03:34.480 --> 01:03:40.039
a minute, it looks a bit like do generally see

729
01:03:40.079 --> 01:03:43.920
someone with a neck brace. It's something like that. But

730
01:03:44.000 --> 01:03:47.159
when it's open so like it's not you know, you

731
01:03:47.199 --> 01:03:50.639
could it's kind of almost like it's stretching their neck

732
01:03:50.639 --> 01:03:58.159
a little bit or a bit like a microscope. I'd

733
01:03:58.239 --> 01:04:00.000
need a microscope if I was going to get one.

734
01:04:01.760 --> 01:04:09.840
So next one useless machine, ultimate machine. Okay, a box

735
01:04:09.880 --> 01:04:16.599
that simply switches A box that simply switches itself off

736
01:04:16.719 --> 01:04:28.400
when you flip it on? What why? Why? Well? What why?

737
01:04:29.440 --> 01:04:32.480
I mean, these are real things, apparently, I wonder if

738
01:04:32.519 --> 01:04:36.079
you can still buy them. See, I'm not really into

739
01:04:36.119 --> 01:04:38.880
collecting and stuff anymore. I'm kind of more than I'm

740
01:04:38.880 --> 01:04:43.199
going around the other way now. Just I don't I

741
01:04:43.280 --> 01:04:50.000
want to declatter if anything, but I just a box

742
01:04:50.079 --> 01:04:59.760
that just switches itself off. Useless machine. I found it.

743
01:04:59.800 --> 01:05:02.760
That that's it. It's just got an on off switch.

744
01:05:03.360 --> 01:05:05.199
So where do you press it on? It goes back

745
01:05:05.199 --> 01:05:10.079
to off again, and that that is it. That's the

746
01:05:10.159 --> 01:05:22.079
whole idea behind it. Wow, Munari's machine in Newtly. This

747
01:05:22.199 --> 01:05:30.119
is an Italian nineteen thirties art machine celebrating purposelessness or

748
01:05:30.159 --> 01:05:39.480
purpose lessen. Yeah, purposelessness okay? Cool. So you've got a

749
01:05:39.559 --> 01:05:46.400
baby mop costume, baby outfit with mop fringes to clean

750
01:05:46.440 --> 01:05:49.760
the floor as they crawl. I like that. That's a

751
01:05:49.760 --> 01:05:54.639
good idea. But that makes sense, doesn't it. I mean

752
01:05:55.719 --> 01:05:59.440
it gives it gives more purpose to having a baby

753
01:05:59.480 --> 01:06:02.719
really than't they. If you can, it's going to be

754
01:06:02.800 --> 01:06:05.880
crawling around the floor, get it, get it made, you know,

755
01:06:05.960 --> 01:06:18.239
clean and place up while it's doing it. Now. Yeah,

756
01:06:20.239 --> 01:06:23.800
Like they're come in different designs. Some of them actually

757
01:06:23.840 --> 01:06:28.480
are designed like a mop, like the bottom, you know,

758
01:06:28.599 --> 01:06:38.199
the front of them is literally like a mop. And

759
01:06:38.280 --> 01:06:45.039
another one is yeah, baby mop outfit. They've been very

760
01:06:45.320 --> 01:06:53.519
literal with the name. That's a great idea. A tissue hat,

761
01:06:54.679 --> 01:06:59.239
a toilet roll worn on your head for easy allergy relief.

762
01:07:08.920 --> 01:07:13.920
That's brilliant. That's great. The thing is all these things

763
01:07:13.960 --> 01:07:17.039
are actually available to buy, which I was surprised at

764
01:07:17.719 --> 01:07:21.000
because it sounds like they wouldn't be. Doesn't it like

765
01:07:21.119 --> 01:07:25.039
they're just kind of made up or their ideas that

766
01:07:25.199 --> 01:07:38.239
never kind of got anywhere. But apparently No. No, there's

767
01:07:38.280 --> 01:07:43.519
a hay fever there's a hay fever hat, which is

768
01:07:43.519 --> 01:07:48.880
basically it's a hat with like a strap round to

769
01:07:48.960 --> 01:07:51.559
keep it on the person's head, and on top of

770
01:07:51.599 --> 01:07:56.000
that hat is a toilet roll dispenser. You know, with

771
01:07:56.079 --> 01:08:05.239
a toilet roll on it. There's another hat which is

772
01:08:05.320 --> 01:08:08.960
just like a normal hat, but it's got a slit

773
01:08:09.000 --> 01:08:12.920
at the top where you can pull tissues tissue paper

774
01:08:12.960 --> 01:08:19.079
out of it. These are real things, These are real,

775
01:08:19.800 --> 01:08:31.079
actual things. My goodness. Yeah, that's brilliant. Love it. Cocktail

776
01:08:31.159 --> 01:08:39.800
duster combined house duster and cocktail shaker. I need to

777
01:08:39.800 --> 01:08:44.159
look this one up because I can't even imagine what

778
01:08:44.159 --> 01:08:56.279
that one's going to look like. Right, So, cocktail shaker

779
01:08:56.760 --> 01:09:03.760
and a duster at the same time. So that doesn't

780
01:09:03.760 --> 01:09:15.039
make sense because I can't find it. Elegant black cocktail

781
01:09:15.119 --> 01:09:18.479
dost to add a warm atmosphere to your home. But

782
01:09:18.560 --> 01:09:31.319
where's the cocktail part? That's what I don't understand. Nope, Yeah,

783
01:09:31.840 --> 01:09:33.840
cocktail shake is quite a big thing, isn't that? Which

784
01:09:33.880 --> 01:09:39.359
you like shake with liquid inside. And the next one

785
01:09:39.439 --> 01:09:44.479
is a plastic bathing suit worn to avoid getting wet

786
01:09:44.520 --> 01:09:58.800
in water, solving fear over need. Okay, a bait having

787
01:09:58.840 --> 01:10:06.000
a bath, but making sure you don't get wet right, Okay,

788
01:10:06.279 --> 01:10:12.520
Do I see any issue with that? Let me think

789
01:10:13.479 --> 01:10:24.000
that might be the weirdest one yet. I'm looking for it,

790
01:10:25.479 --> 01:10:29.840
but I can't find it. I mean that's that's basically

791
01:10:30.000 --> 01:10:32.640
just getting in a bath with a wet suit on,

792
01:10:32.760 --> 01:10:39.560
isn't it. It is? There is literally no point. I mean,

793
01:10:39.680 --> 01:10:42.680
that's the whole point of having a pointless inventions. But

794
01:10:45.560 --> 01:10:50.760
plastic bathing suit, like a bathing suit, it's not going

795
01:10:50.840 --> 01:10:57.920
to stop you from getting wet anyway, because it doesn't

796
01:10:57.960 --> 01:11:00.319
cover the whole body, does it. I mean, I guess

797
01:11:00.359 --> 01:11:03.319
if his plastic, it will stop certain parts from getting wet,

798
01:11:06.680 --> 01:11:09.880
but a bathing suit doesn't. It's not it's not a

799
01:11:09.880 --> 01:11:16.640
wet suit, is it. Sorry to pick holes. Selfie sticks

800
01:11:19.159 --> 01:11:22.119
as chin doogu, I don't know what that means. Initially

801
01:11:22.119 --> 01:11:32.399
a joke tool, later embraced widely selfie sticks. I don't

802
01:11:32.479 --> 01:11:36.279
understand what chicken googu is. I think it's a Japanese thing,

803
01:11:41.640 --> 01:11:46.239
all right, So I think selfie sticks were created and

804
01:11:46.319 --> 01:11:49.079
people thought it was silly, but they actually took on

805
01:11:55.000 --> 01:11:58.800
and people realized that selfie sticks were pretty cool and

806
01:11:58.920 --> 01:12:06.920
they were useful. I'll just see an image of one

807
01:12:06.920 --> 01:12:12.840
of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen. Okay, it's

808
01:12:13.880 --> 01:12:22.000
a food cooler Japanese. It's in Japan, and the person's

809
01:12:22.000 --> 01:12:26.640
got a bowl of rice probably noodles rather sorry noodles,

810
01:12:27.880 --> 01:12:34.479
and attached to the chopsticks is hanging from the chopsticks

811
01:12:34.600 --> 01:12:37.560
is a fan, which is like a lot of a

812
01:12:37.640 --> 01:12:53.720
miniature little fan that's calling the food. Well, not just

813
01:12:53.720 --> 01:12:57.439
seeing another version of that hat, that the tissue hat.

814
01:12:58.600 --> 01:13:01.159
It's a real thing. I mean, these are real things.

815
01:13:01.279 --> 01:13:07.880
I can't. I can't, I just can't. It's like no.

816
01:13:09.600 --> 01:13:19.079
Next is chromatically selective cat flap and orbital bomb. I'm

817
01:13:19.119 --> 01:13:23.000
not sure what that means. Pedrick's bizarre cat flap that

818
01:13:23.079 --> 01:13:32.119
only lets a ginger cat in plus billion ton bomb ideas, Right, Okay,

819
01:13:32.720 --> 01:13:35.840
let's just move away from a billion ton bomb ideas.

820
01:13:36.560 --> 01:13:41.880
But I'm interested in how have they managed to make

821
01:13:42.439 --> 01:13:48.359
a cat flap that only lets ginger cats in? Don't know,

822
01:13:53.680 --> 01:13:58.239
I don't know. I got no idea fire curtain around

823
01:13:58.760 --> 01:14:08.079
entire high rise? Yes, invent Okay, so high rise that's flats,

824
01:14:08.159 --> 01:14:15.159
isn't it. So let's have a look. It sounds like

825
01:14:15.199 --> 01:14:45.960
a good idea to me, but let's see what looks like. Wow. Yeah, yeah,

826
01:14:46.439 --> 01:14:53.840
it's a huge undertaking. But I'm not gonna make jokes

827
01:14:54.119 --> 01:14:57.960
about this one. It's like anything that helps people good

828
01:14:59.000 --> 01:15:01.760
let's move on from that. I don't know how they

829
01:15:01.840 --> 01:15:11.199
make them so big. The reason why they didn't get it,

830
01:15:11.479 --> 01:15:15.720
didn't kind of become popular is because risk of suffocation

831
01:15:15.840 --> 01:15:21.159
and blocking exits. So yeah, fair enough, but okay, yeah.

832
01:15:21.359 --> 01:15:23.239
The thing is the way I see it is like, okay,

833
01:15:23.399 --> 01:15:31.119
these inventions, someone's made them create an invention to save lives. Like, okay,

834
01:15:31.239 --> 01:15:36.800
it didn't work, needs changes, needs tweaking, but amazing. Still though,

835
01:15:36.800 --> 01:15:45.640
isn't it really? I'm so wholesome cereh bres armchair, cold

836
01:15:45.760 --> 01:15:54.199
head and heated feet to boost thinking. So cool head?

837
01:15:54.399 --> 01:15:57.359
So the cool a cool head increases thinking? Is it?

838
01:15:57.720 --> 01:16:04.560
And warming warm fee increased? I didn't notice. And I've

839
01:16:04.560 --> 01:16:10.520
got a picture of someone that this is weird, very strange.

840
01:16:10.600 --> 01:16:20.199
Oh my good No, no, okay, so I've got a

841
01:16:20.239 --> 01:16:26.960
picture of it. It's basically a chair. So you've got

842
01:16:27.000 --> 01:16:29.680
a heater on your feet below your feet, heating your

843
01:16:29.680 --> 01:16:33.640
feet up, and it's big thing sticking over your head

844
01:16:34.319 --> 01:16:47.239
like a fridge. Yeah maybe not, maybe not. A magnetic

845
01:16:47.479 --> 01:16:57.720
condom claim to improve sensitivity via electro magnets effects. Well,

846
01:16:57.760 --> 01:17:01.079
you know what, I imagine it'd be quite useful because

847
01:17:04.760 --> 01:17:10.600
if you had the you know, if you made sure

848
01:17:10.640 --> 01:17:15.159
that above you on the ceiling was the opposite to

849
01:17:15.239 --> 01:17:23.520
the magnet, it would kind of always be trying to

850
01:17:23.560 --> 01:17:27.199
get to the magnet. Or if you place the other magnet,

851
01:17:27.800 --> 01:17:29.560
you know, the opposite of the side of it, you know,

852
01:17:29.600 --> 01:17:34.000
so that it is magnetized or whatever, always at the

853
01:17:34.039 --> 01:17:38.279
same siding or whatever, but another magnet and put that

854
01:17:38.359 --> 01:17:45.239
in a specific place, it could it could be a

855
01:17:45.279 --> 01:17:57.960
solution to some problems that some people have. Ooh, I

856
01:17:58.000 --> 01:18:05.840
don't know, what do you think. I've just looked at it.

857
01:18:05.840 --> 01:18:24.560
It's that Yeah, they're they're they're definitely yeah. I'm not

858
01:18:26.199 --> 01:18:30.279
I don't know. I'm not gonna. I don't know. We

859
01:18:30.600 --> 01:18:39.119
with weight, I I can't. I'm not kind of read

860
01:18:39.159 --> 01:18:50.840
this one out right, you're ready for this right week?

861
01:18:51.239 --> 01:18:58.079
With weight for self defense makes a fashion statement and

862
01:18:58.159 --> 01:19:07.159
a self defense weapon. So what was that song from

863
01:19:07.199 --> 01:19:11.520
the early two thousands? I whipped my hair. I whipped

864
01:19:11.520 --> 01:19:13.880
my hair back and forth. I whipped my hair back

865
01:19:13.920 --> 01:19:17.039
and forth. Remember that one, just over and over again

866
01:19:17.119 --> 01:19:21.880
and Will Smith's daughter, I whipped my hair back and forth.

867
01:19:21.920 --> 01:19:23.800
I whipped my hair back and forth. I whipped my

868
01:19:23.840 --> 01:19:27.239
hair back and forth. It's a little bit like that

869
01:19:30.039 --> 01:19:47.680
with weight self defense A several look. Wow, yeah, So

870
01:19:48.680 --> 01:19:51.960
I suppose if you've got very, very long hair, you

871
01:19:52.000 --> 01:19:54.279
could use it as a kind of a whip, couldn't you.

872
01:19:54.319 --> 01:19:58.279
I suppose are you st to when I had with

873
01:19:58.520 --> 01:20:01.279
long hair, not a little whip, but I used to.

874
01:20:03.199 --> 01:20:05.399
I mean to beef that. I used to do that thing,

875
01:20:05.479 --> 01:20:07.560
you know, I whipped my hair back and forth. I

876
01:20:07.640 --> 01:20:10.840
used to do that before it was popular, but I

877
01:20:10.920 --> 01:20:20.960
was in the early twenties with my long hair. I

878
01:20:21.239 --> 01:20:23.720
used to wake up. He literally, he used to fill

879
01:20:23.800 --> 01:20:27.399
the entire room my hair because it was just so curly.

880
01:20:32.000 --> 01:20:36.479
Remember once someone thought it'd be a funny idea. So

881
01:20:36.520 --> 01:20:41.560
it was in a car some friends and he pulled

882
01:20:41.600 --> 01:20:43.640
the ponytail off, said like that. You know, there's a

883
01:20:43.680 --> 01:20:47.199
little strap thing for my ponytail. We were stuck in

884
01:20:47.199 --> 01:20:51.079
that car for seven days. Honestly, none of us could

885
01:20:51.119 --> 01:20:59.359
get out because my hair just expanded. Toothbrush with no

886
01:21:00.319 --> 01:21:08.680
really toothbrush with real teeth, bristles replaced by actual small teeth.

887
01:21:11.880 --> 01:21:17.680
Apparently it's more for novelty. Really, here's me thinking, that's

888
01:21:17.720 --> 01:21:24.119
my next that's the next thing on my center's list.

889
01:21:27.800 --> 01:21:37.800
Why why though, But why a fingernail brush made of

890
01:21:37.920 --> 01:21:47.960
wall nails, cleansing tool made with nails porn pointed inwards. Okay.

891
01:21:49.119 --> 01:21:54.000
Sweeper that hides dirt under rugs. I like that sweeper

892
01:21:54.039 --> 01:21:57.760
that hides the dirt under rugs. I broom to sweep

893
01:21:57.760 --> 01:22:03.920
it up and then discreetly hide it. I mean that's

894
01:22:03.920 --> 01:22:05.680
what every I mean. I always used to do that

895
01:22:08.439 --> 01:22:14.199
spring Bible and prayer case a jext book about needing

896
01:22:14.279 --> 01:22:15.279
a ribbon marker.

897
01:22:19.039 --> 01:22:44.399
Okay, I can't look at this one.

898
01:22:35.720 --> 01:22:40.840
Spring, so it just pops up. That's a good idea,

899
01:22:40.880 --> 01:22:50.880
isn't it. Maybe pickle fork and elastic opera hat I

900
01:22:50.920 --> 01:23:02.880
mean these are like Victorian designs. So where does the

901
01:23:02.960 --> 01:23:20.119
pickle go operhaps pickle fork and elastic opera has so

902
01:23:20.279 --> 01:23:25.680
I can't see. Yeah, I can't get any proper picture

903
01:23:25.720 --> 01:23:30.880
of it. And the next one's Niagara rocking bath a

904
01:23:31.000 --> 01:23:34.960
tub that rocks to keep water still and mimic waves.

905
01:23:39.159 --> 01:23:42.680
A tub that rocks to keep water still and mimic waves.

906
01:23:43.399 --> 01:23:48.000
I mean that's two different things, isn't it. Keeping water

907
01:23:48.039 --> 01:23:53.840
still and mimicking waves is not the same thing. I

908
01:23:53.880 --> 01:24:00.319
do believe a multi purpose cane that can built withs

909
01:24:00.319 --> 01:24:10.239
of built in functions, opium pipe, flute, horse measurer. Well, okay,

910
01:24:10.920 --> 01:24:15.399
it's like a Swiss army knife, but for canes. There's

911
01:24:15.439 --> 01:24:23.840
a flying saucer, camera, lens system, detect RFO color anomalies. Okay,

912
01:24:23.880 --> 01:24:33.239
cool and goofy bike family contraption. So a bike with

913
01:24:33.359 --> 01:24:38.840
multiple seats and a sewing machine mounts it. Why would

914
01:24:38.880 --> 01:24:44.520
you have a sewing machine on a bike, Finny, even

915
01:24:44.600 --> 01:24:47.920
you don't know that, do you? Why would you have

916
01:24:47.960 --> 01:24:50.239
a sewing machine on a bike? And why haven't you

917
01:24:50.319 --> 01:24:53.680
eaten your dinner all day? You've not eaten a single

918
01:24:53.760 --> 01:24:57.279
thing all day. I don't know what it is. I've

919
01:24:57.319 --> 01:25:00.760
just seen a picture of it. This is ridiculous. This

920
01:25:00.880 --> 01:25:16.960
is an actual picture. So you've got the right. This

921
01:25:17.600 --> 01:25:21.239
one man who looks like a young bloke at the

922
01:25:21.239 --> 01:25:26.159
back of the bike. You got the father looks like

923
01:25:26.920 --> 01:25:30.560
he's standing and he's cycling at the top. Now he's

924
01:25:30.600 --> 01:25:35.560
on a chair cycling at the top. There's a young

925
01:25:35.640 --> 01:25:38.960
lady sitting at the front. She doesn't seem to be

926
01:25:39.039 --> 01:25:43.039
doing too much, just holding onto something. And in the

927
01:25:43.079 --> 01:25:49.239
middle there's a there's a female with a sewing machine.

928
01:25:49.800 --> 01:25:54.119
And I'm guessing the bike is moving along, which is

929
01:25:55.600 --> 01:26:09.680
rotating the sewing machine. I I think it's brilliant. I

930
01:26:09.800 --> 01:26:16.840
do a vacuum beauty bonnet plastic mask using suction to

931
01:26:17.000 --> 01:26:23.920
beautify face. Okay, I gotta look at this. This is

932
01:26:23.960 --> 01:26:27.279
going to be silly, you know, not like all the

933
01:26:27.560 --> 01:26:38.119
really sensible stuff I've looked at so far. Oh my,

934
01:26:38.479 --> 01:26:47.119
really it's I think basically, it just sucks your skin

935
01:26:47.239 --> 01:26:52.560
bag and see you later bye. And I want to

936
01:26:52.680 --> 01:26:57.960
look at that. A scooter with a cannon, A bizarre

937
01:26:58.239 --> 01:27:09.000
armed scooter concept. Stamp licking doghead? Who stamp licking doghead?

938
01:27:09.920 --> 01:27:16.600
Humidify stamps using a fake dog mouth? That sounds like

939
01:27:16.640 --> 01:27:30.199
a good idea, actually right, Okay, it's just pictures of dogs,

940
01:27:30.439 --> 01:27:39.880
actual dogs, right. No, I found it. I found it

941
01:27:45.199 --> 01:27:49.439
vintage nineteen ninety eight. I don't think the word vintage

942
01:27:49.600 --> 01:27:56.079
should be before nineteen ninety eight. How can something be

943
01:27:56.159 --> 01:28:02.119
vintage it's only a few years back vintage. I think

944
01:28:02.199 --> 01:28:07.600
vintage should be like nineteen twenties, maybe nineteen thirties. You know,

945
01:28:07.680 --> 01:28:17.760
I can't find a picture of it. Oh well, a

946
01:28:17.800 --> 01:28:26.159
fence cycle machine to pull yourself along a fence? Why

947
01:28:27.399 --> 01:28:31.119
treadmill inside a cage that opens only after you've used

948
01:28:31.159 --> 01:28:37.560
it viral, a backscrubber sword, a giant brush blade combo

949
01:28:37.680 --> 01:28:43.600
to scratch your back, and lastly, a scooter with a toilet,

950
01:28:45.000 --> 01:28:51.920
a fully mobile laboratory scooter combo. I don't know what's

951
01:28:52.000 --> 01:29:01.159
going on. I'm very confused, very confused, indeed, And on

952
01:29:01.199 --> 01:29:05.359
that note, I'm going to bring this to a close.

953
01:29:08.680 --> 01:29:11.239
So this has been Trivia Tuesday, a little bit late,

954
01:29:11.319 --> 01:29:18.560
but still nevertheless, it got here eventually. Yeah, So thank

955
01:29:18.560 --> 01:29:21.439
you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself, because

956
01:29:21.439 --> 01:29:25.319
you do deserve to be happy and be gentle your self.

957
01:29:25.319 --> 01:29:30.640
You deserve to feel safe. What's the love? That's why

958
01:29:30.680 --> 01:29:41.000
I can video up by you got it right? Relax

959
01:29:44.600 --> 01:29:55.199
in a more deep and meaningful way, Maybe in a

960
01:29:55.279 --> 01:30:04.399
way that can not just allow you feel calmer now

961
01:30:05.359 --> 01:30:14.039
and throughout the time we spend together here, not just

962
01:30:14.239 --> 01:30:19.880
relaxed at the end of the recording when it's finished

963
01:30:19.920 --> 01:30:26.479
and you can enjoy that sense of comfort and peace,

964
01:30:31.239 --> 01:30:44.039
but also I think it would be nice to have

965
01:30:44.520 --> 01:31:01.560
those feelings of relaxation continue for longer after the recording

966
01:31:01.600 --> 01:31:15.079
has ended, so that you can still benefit from listening

967
01:31:15.960 --> 01:31:24.920
to my voice. Maybe in a few hours time, perhaps tomorrow,

968
01:31:30.920 --> 01:31:38.760
and then by listening regularly, especially if you find like

969
01:31:38.880 --> 01:31:42.359
some people do and myself as well. I sometimes I

970
01:31:42.479 --> 01:31:53.079
find one particular recording that really resonates with me, and

971
01:31:53.119 --> 01:31:58.319
I just listen to it over and over again every morning,

972
01:31:58.520 --> 01:32:11.079
every evening. There was this recording from We're going back

973
01:32:11.119 --> 01:32:16.399
to about nineteen ninety nine. It was it wasn't hypnosis,

974
01:32:16.479 --> 01:32:21.760
but it was a guided visualizations. It kind of was hypnosis, really,

975
01:32:24.239 --> 01:32:29.439
and I managed to find it again and it still

976
01:32:29.520 --> 01:32:35.119
has the same effect on me. And part of it

977
01:32:35.279 --> 01:32:50.000
was the person's voice relaxed me, just felt so peaceful,

978
01:32:52.119 --> 01:32:58.600
and I'd look forward to listening to her in the

979
01:32:58.680 --> 01:33:09.399
morning and in the evening. And I knew before even

980
01:33:10.119 --> 01:33:18.600
pressing the play button that since I've done that, pressed

981
01:33:18.640 --> 01:33:27.840
the play button. This is in the days of CD players,

982
01:33:30.800 --> 01:33:36.319
press the play button, if that it might have even

983
01:33:36.359 --> 01:33:40.600
been a tape tape recorder. I'd lie down on the

984
01:33:40.600 --> 01:33:54.159
bed and then even without necessarily listening to her words,

985
01:33:57.359 --> 01:34:06.840
because I have memorized, really, it was as if my

986
01:34:06.920 --> 01:34:18.319
body knew exactly what to do, and the muscles just

987
01:34:22.279 --> 01:34:40.279
almost went into automatic relaxation, and I remember my mind

988
01:34:42.920 --> 01:34:43.840
would slow down.

989
01:34:49.439 --> 01:34:53.000
Now. Now, I was.

990
01:34:53.119 --> 01:35:00.000
Listening to this recording in the early days of learning hypnosis.

991
01:35:00.159 --> 01:35:10.159
This and long before I ever made any videos or

992
01:35:10.239 --> 01:35:15.039
audio recordings myself, because I didn't start doing that till

993
01:35:15.199 --> 01:35:29.359
two thousand and six. But I knew, I knew how

994
01:35:31.039 --> 01:35:44.840
helpful I found being able to just let go, to

995
01:35:44.960 --> 01:35:50.159
have that trust in the person that I'm listening to,

996
01:35:57.840 --> 01:36:04.560
knowing that it's going to be just as relaxing, if

997
01:36:06.000 --> 01:36:15.359
not more so. Each time you hear my voice, you

998
01:36:15.439 --> 01:36:27.079
may feel the same. Some people have been listening to

999
01:36:27.159 --> 01:36:41.079
me for over a decade, maybe not solidly, obviously not

1000
01:36:41.079 --> 01:36:47.399
twenty four hours a day, but maybe people come back.

1001
01:36:49.239 --> 01:37:02.920
Some people may be listen every day. That's something that

1002
01:37:03.039 --> 01:37:16.000
I do which you may not realize by listening, is

1003
01:37:20.119 --> 01:37:35.159
when I record these recordings. Now, for example, I also

1004
01:37:35.920 --> 01:37:47.159
am affected by the words that I say. So if

1005
01:37:47.199 --> 01:37:57.560
I set you focus on your feet, notice your feet relaxing,

1006
01:38:01.039 --> 01:38:08.960
I will be focusing on my feet. I will be

1007
01:38:09.079 --> 01:38:27.159
noticing my feet relaxing. If I said, focus on your hands,

1008
01:38:29.960 --> 01:38:39.479
and maybe notice the difference between each hand. Perhaps notice

1009
01:38:39.600 --> 01:38:45.680
the the air in the room, the temperature of the room,

1010
01:38:47.520 --> 01:38:57.920
on the backs of your hands. You may start to

1011
01:38:58.479 --> 01:39:05.600
notice what all that feels like a very light breeze,

1012
01:39:06.279 --> 01:39:10.399
even though there may not be any type of breeze

1013
01:39:10.600 --> 01:39:23.359
at all where you are right now. And as you

1014
01:39:23.439 --> 01:39:37.119
become aware of your hands, I'm also aware of how

1015
01:39:38.279 --> 01:40:02.720
relaxed my hands are feeling now, and when it comes

1016
01:40:02.880 --> 01:40:09.880
to potentially drifting off to sleep, which may be the

1017
01:40:10.039 --> 01:40:25.880
reason you're listening, I also feel drowsy when I make

1018
01:40:25.960 --> 01:40:47.159
these recordings. I also notice my mind drifting. In fact,

1019
01:40:47.399 --> 01:41:04.119
at times I've actually fallen asleep without even noticing, and

1020
01:41:04.159 --> 01:41:15.119
then I carry on talking. And it's only when I

1021
01:41:15.199 --> 01:41:24.560
listen back to do the editing I hear snoring and

1022
01:41:24.680 --> 01:41:34.600
I think, I don't remember snoring. I remember talking. Was

1023
01:41:34.640 --> 01:41:41.840
this snoring was a pig turned up? That's why I

1024
01:41:41.920 --> 01:41:50.039
sound like when I snare and I get really into

1025
01:41:50.119 --> 01:42:09.479
the whole experience. I don't know how you feel, how

1026
01:42:09.600 --> 01:42:20.439
relaxed you feel in your feet, how relaxed you feel

1027
01:42:20.600 --> 01:42:38.279
in your hands. I have noticed.

1028
01:42:40.319 --> 01:42:46.680
More and more.

1029
01:42:47.199 --> 01:42:59.920
That the more relaxed, deeper level of comfort you feel,

1030
01:43:03.520 --> 01:43:19.720
the easier your breathing becomes. It's almost like that additional

1031
01:43:22.840 --> 01:43:43.840
muscle relaxation. So this allows you the breath easier without

1032
01:43:45.279 --> 01:44:16.279
necessarily focusing on your breath, however, being able to notice

1033
01:44:16.640 --> 01:44:46.399
the ease in which you breathe so naturally, you breathe

1034
01:44:46.960 --> 01:45:30.640
so very easily and smoothly. Whenever I imagine my breathing improving,

1035
01:45:36.359 --> 01:45:49.720
when I've got my eyes closed, I tend to visualize

1036
01:45:51.800 --> 01:46:06.199
a beautiful field with trees and flowers producing all that

1037
01:46:08.239 --> 01:46:41.000
life giving oxygen. It feels nice too, if nothing else,

1038
01:46:44.199 --> 01:47:18.319
just taking some time away from everything, enjoying that feeling

1039
01:47:18.720 --> 01:48:09.319
of peace serenity with a joyful heart. Time seems to

1040
01:48:09.479 --> 01:48:44.600
just drip by so very slowly, relaxed, so deeply peaceful,

1041
01:48:54.520 --> 01:50:03.119
completely unattached to any thoughts whatsoever in this moment, completely free,

1042
01:50:03.760 --> 01:50:55.159
noticing that your mind has slowed down. Slowed down because

1043
01:50:55.319 --> 01:51:23.920
nothing really required your attention, you can enjoy the physical

1044
01:51:24.279 --> 01:51:35.920
sensations of allowing the stress to rip out of your body,

1045
01:51:42.399 --> 01:52:06.239
to appear out of every part of your body being

1046
01:52:06.560 --> 01:52:45.279
released from your brain, h your mind slowly but surely,

1047
01:52:52.119 --> 01:53:29.479
the muscles in your legs relax res so very deeply,

1048
01:53:39.239 --> 01:54:10.319
res so deeply, and the feelings, the pleasant feelings in

1049
01:54:10.399 --> 01:54:34.920
your arms and shoulders deepening each part of your body

1050
01:54:38.239 --> 01:55:16.680
further and deeper and deeper. Noticine, the feelings in the

1051
01:55:16.720 --> 01:56:16.640
back of your neck, the feelings in your wrists, muscles,

1052
01:56:18.680 --> 01:56:56.000
in front of your body. I all say, feeling peaceful deeply,

1053
01:57:13.000 --> 01:57:23.279
there's a sense of peace spreads through your very core.

1054
01:57:53.800 --> 01:58:13.720
Even when you focus on your mind. Her mind becomes

1055
01:58:21.039 --> 01:59:43.000
ee and slower, even deeper, relaxing, so very slow. His

1056
01:59:43.359 --> 02:00:41.079
stomach peace fin's stomach, your back. Notice, Notice how relaxed

1057
02:00:45.399 --> 02:01:23.439
you'd now feel in the hall of your back. In

1058
02:01:23.840 --> 02:01:32.920
spy from your brain all the way down the middle

1059
02:01:32.960 --> 02:01:52.840
of your back, sending and receiving millions of messages every day,

1060
02:01:55.840 --> 02:03:16.399
deepcomfort increasing deeply exed You means legs spreading those signals

1061
02:03:16.680 --> 02:03:25.359
down a spine or cord into air, every part of

1062
02:03:25.520 --> 02:04:11.720
your body, your chins and your calf muscles withr elbows.

1063
02:04:28.000 --> 02:04:45.479
Feelings of peace and tranquility spreading through your body, tips

1064
02:04:45.479 --> 02:05:01.680
of your toes, to your eyes, your fingers. All wait

1065
02:05:01.920 --> 02:05:47.159
till you lower back, letting he re the thinker, peace,

1066
02:06:02.960 --> 02:06:33.600
drifting mind just wandering away, happy to let go, let

1067
02:06:33.640 --> 02:07:39.119
go completely, let go, so tranquil, the whole body enjoying

1068
02:07:39.119 --> 02:08:07.239
a sense listening God.

1069
02:08:09.039 --> 02:08:11.119
He for more.

1070
02:09:19.279 --> 02:10:33.800
Peace, for joy. The space this space of peace and safety,

1071
02:10:36.079 --> 02:12:38.640
so firy, relaxed, letting go. Maybe we can just focus

1072
02:12:39.000 --> 02:13:13.119
on the different parts of your body, just to notice

1073
02:13:13.760 --> 02:14:16.319
a forehead and your eyes U so lose, noticing the

1074
02:14:16.520 --> 02:15:51.560
sense of complete freedom, absolute freedom, PRIs rift, peace for energy,

1075
02:16:24.399 --> 02:16:33.680
peace to breathe, so much easier.

1076
02:17:14.040 --> 02:17:14.520
Loose.

1077
02:17:35.639 --> 02:17:47.280
You may have or may not have noticed your mind

1078
02:17:47.959 --> 02:18:49.120
drifting peaceful, move any even more deeply in the direction

1079
02:18:49.319 --> 02:20:25.040
of total for pace, bliss, for pace to rest, total peace,

1080
02:20:49.719 --> 02:21:46.840
con soap, calm, lett him go peace with mind rexed

1081
02:21:50.879 --> 02:22:50.079
forty so relaxed, so relaxed. Your body feels almost invisible,

1082
02:23:05.239 --> 02:24:25.799
so very relaxed. I'm peaceful, so peace relax liqua. And

1083
02:24:25.920 --> 02:24:33.239
you could start to notice that you are feeling more relaxed,

1084
02:24:36.200 --> 02:24:46.040
even though I've not purposely focused your mind upon that

1085
02:24:47.319 --> 02:24:53.440
sense of physical comfort that is growing within you throughout

1086
02:24:53.479 --> 02:25:06.360
your body, and your mind starts to slow down. And

1087
02:25:06.440 --> 02:25:13.959
that could be almost in recognition of I guess my

1088
02:25:14.159 --> 02:25:29.040
speech not being particularly fast, and things just generally feel calmer.

1089
02:25:32.440 --> 02:25:40.399
Just by listening to my voice, you give yourself an

1090
02:25:40.479 --> 02:25:48.479
opportunity to take a break from the day, take a

1091
02:25:48.520 --> 02:25:56.719
break from your life as it is, and to give yourself,

1092
02:25:56.760 --> 02:26:07.000
a rest, yourself, permission to take some time off and

1093
02:26:07.120 --> 02:26:12.799
to allow your body to relax and allow your mind

1094
02:26:13.159 --> 02:26:24.520
to slow down, which in turn releases the tension and

1095
02:26:24.680 --> 02:26:33.639
he stresses that you had in your body. It's almost

1096
02:26:33.680 --> 02:26:37.920
as if the parts of your body just open up,

1097
02:26:39.159 --> 02:26:50.799
allowing the negativity out and at the same time replacing

1098
02:26:51.639 --> 02:27:01.200
that negativity with positive heathing energy, which then fills your

1099
02:27:01.239 --> 02:27:13.079
body up and your mind to also starts to appreciate

1100
02:27:13.959 --> 02:27:32.319
those feelings of increasing confidence, an almost uplifting feeling, positive healing,

1101
02:27:35.479 --> 02:27:44.079
an energy that spreads through your body like a wave

1102
02:27:46.360 --> 02:27:58.559
of comfort. And all this comes from just allowing yourself

1103
02:28:01.360 --> 02:28:06.600
a few minutes, maybe half an hour, however long you

1104
02:28:06.639 --> 02:28:10.879
want it to be, to just rest.

1105
02:28:15.879 --> 02:28:16.920
And allow.

1106
02:28:19.040 --> 02:28:29.040
Your mind and your body to almost reset itself to

1107
02:28:29.719 --> 02:28:45.399
the settings of comfort and relaxation, calmness, which allows more

1108
02:28:45.520 --> 02:28:58.959
room for feelings of pleasure and happiness to move around

1109
02:28:59.200 --> 02:29:07.440
your body and into your mind, almost as if your

1110
02:29:07.520 --> 02:29:18.120
mind and your body are sinking together, almost mirroring each

1111
02:29:18.319 --> 02:29:33.920
other with that growing positivity and calmness, and it feels nice.

1112
02:29:34.040 --> 02:29:40.079
It really does feel nice to know that you are

1113
02:29:40.120 --> 02:29:50.319
the one that has allowed yourself to feel more comfort

1114
02:29:53.520 --> 02:30:07.040
and to experience more of this deep relaxation spreading throughout

1115
02:30:07.120 --> 02:30:19.399
your body. And as I focus on each part of

1116
02:30:19.440 --> 02:30:31.639
your body, you can notice that that part becomes even

1117
02:30:32.840 --> 02:30:42.200
more relaxed just by focusing on it. It becomes even

1118
02:30:42.399 --> 02:30:55.079
more calm and comfortable, just by focusing. And as I

1119
02:30:55.319 --> 02:31:03.639
move down your body, starting at your head, the parts

1120
02:31:03.719 --> 02:31:11.200
that you've already focused on will continue to relax deeply

1121
02:31:13.959 --> 02:31:20.000
and those parts that we've not yet focused on or

1122
02:31:20.120 --> 02:31:31.959
just automatically release any remaining tension in anticipation of even

1123
02:31:32.319 --> 02:31:44.879
more comfort about to come. Now, I'm going to start

1124
02:31:44.959 --> 02:31:52.879
by focusing on your forehead, just being aware the feelings

1125
02:31:52.920 --> 02:32:03.239
of your forehead and any background sound. But mister Herbert,

1126
02:32:03.319 --> 02:32:08.840
the pigeon can just allow you to feel even more relaxed.

1127
02:32:12.719 --> 02:32:18.840
Just means you're in the moment. This isn't this isn't

1128
02:32:18.879 --> 02:32:26.879
a sterile environment. This is the world. I live in

1129
02:32:26.920 --> 02:32:39.280
the countryside, so there's lots of nature sounds around. So

1130
02:32:39.319 --> 02:32:44.559
as you focus on your forehead, just notice how it

1131
02:32:44.719 --> 02:32:54.639
becomes even more relaxed as you focus only on my

1132
02:32:54.920 --> 02:33:04.479
voice and that part of your body. Moving down to

1133
02:33:04.600 --> 02:33:17.559
your eyes, focusing on your eyes, noticing how your eyelids

1134
02:33:17.760 --> 02:33:25.000
feel so heavy yet so light at the same time,

1135
02:33:28.200 --> 02:33:38.879
and all the muscles around your eyes relaxing completely. Moving

1136
02:33:38.959 --> 02:33:46.159
your focus down to your mouth, your lips, your tongue,

1137
02:33:47.360 --> 02:33:55.319
your teeth, and your gumbs, the whole of your mouth relaxing,

1138
02:33:58.799 --> 02:34:09.079
calm and lease. As you focus now on your jaw,

1139
02:34:12.079 --> 02:34:15.680
not just the part of your jaw near your mouth

1140
02:34:16.479 --> 02:34:20.799
and your chin, but all the way up the size

1141
02:34:20.840 --> 02:34:28.719
of your face to your ears, the hole of your jaw,

1142
02:34:30.280 --> 02:34:37.399
feeding more, relaxed.

1143
02:34:40.840 --> 02:34:49.280
And calm.

1144
02:34:49.719 --> 02:34:58.879
Focusing on your neck, the front of your neck and

1145
02:34:58.920 --> 02:35:11.959
your throat relaxing and loose and calm. The side of

1146
02:35:12.040 --> 02:35:17.360
your neck, the right and left side of your neck,

1147
02:35:20.280 --> 02:35:23.799
relax and loose.

1148
02:35:27.479 --> 02:35:31.120
And calm.

1149
02:35:34.600 --> 02:35:41.479
And now the back of your neck, focusing on the

1150
02:35:41.559 --> 02:35:52.000
back of your neck, letting go of any tension that

1151
02:35:52.159 --> 02:36:01.079
may have been there before, and enjoying that sense of

1152
02:36:02.040 --> 02:36:12.799
increasing comfort and release that you can experience in the

1153
02:36:12.840 --> 02:36:25.079
back of your neck. Moving down your back and moving

1154
02:36:25.319 --> 02:36:29.799
either side of your spine right from the top of.

1155
02:36:29.760 --> 02:36:30.680
Your back.

1156
02:36:32.239 --> 02:36:35.920
All the way down to the bottom of your back,

1157
02:36:41.920 --> 02:36:53.239
down to your lower back. And as you move up

1158
02:36:53.280 --> 02:37:02.120
and down your spine, you can feel the muscles either

1159
02:37:02.239 --> 02:37:15.799
side of your spine relaxing even more. And as those

1160
02:37:15.920 --> 02:37:25.360
muscles relax, that sense of comfort starts to spread outwards

1161
02:37:26.920 --> 02:37:36.559
from your spine into both sides of your back, the

1162
02:37:36.639 --> 02:37:40.159
top of your back, the middle, and your lower back.

1163
02:37:43.680 --> 02:37:50.840
And as you scan gently and slowly up and down

1164
02:37:51.000 --> 02:37:56.120
your back, there's the muscles in the top of your

1165
02:37:56.159 --> 02:38:05.760
back relax and become loose, sir. The muscles in the

1166
02:38:05.799 --> 02:38:12.959
middle of your back also seem to just almost divide

1167
02:38:13.280 --> 02:38:20.159
from each other, separating and almost melting.

1168
02:38:25.920 --> 02:38:27.600
And in your lower back.

1169
02:38:31.040 --> 02:38:38.600
There seems to be an extra special feeling of comfort.

1170
02:38:43.840 --> 02:38:50.000
The spreads into your hips, so down your lower back,

1171
02:38:50.319 --> 02:38:58.280
into your hips, into the area where your cosis are,

1172
02:39:01.840 --> 02:39:09.360
and into your buttocks, and all those muscles that spread

1173
02:39:10.799 --> 02:39:20.559
when your lower back into your hip area start to melt,

1174
02:39:25.000 --> 02:39:37.879
start to really let go. And even nowhere about to

1175
02:39:37.959 --> 02:39:44.680
focus on your shoulders. Your back and your spine will

1176
02:39:44.799 --> 02:40:06.040
continue to let go, continue to relax so calmly, and

1177
02:40:06.079 --> 02:40:11.280
as you focus on your shoulders, you may notice that

1178
02:40:11.280 --> 02:40:42.760
they're already feeling really loose. They're already feeding, calm and fearing.

1179
02:40:46.920 --> 02:40:55.280
Those muscles then move from your neck into your shoulders

1180
02:41:01.799 --> 02:41:31.200
feel so soft and gentle, so smooth and calm, and

1181
02:41:31.399 --> 02:41:44.319
the feeling in your shoulders seems to spread deep into

1182
02:41:44.360 --> 02:41:54.799
your shoulders, that sense of relaxation, not just traveling deeply

1183
02:41:55.159 --> 02:42:12.440
into your muscles, also relaxing the bones and moving all

1184
02:42:12.479 --> 02:42:21.079
the way to underneath your arms, relaxing that whole area

1185
02:42:21.239 --> 02:42:31.040
between the tops of your shoulders and underneath your arms healing.

1186
02:42:36.440 --> 02:42:37.159
You feel so.

1187
02:42:39.040 --> 02:42:53.120
Relaxed and comfortable in your shoulders, which sends that deep

1188
02:42:53.920 --> 02:43:14.799
healing message into your arms. And you may feel almost

1189
02:43:14.920 --> 02:43:19.680
as if your arms are not even there, because they're

1190
02:43:20.200 --> 02:44:07.639
so relaxed, so deeply relaxed, so so calm.

1191
02:43:55.959 --> 02:43:56.120
So.

1192
02:44:02.760 --> 02:44:17.879
Loose, not feeling spreading all the way down your arms,

1193
02:44:20.559 --> 02:44:51.120
two elbows, including your elbows circumforts spreads or away into wrists,

1194
02:44:53.479 --> 02:45:09.040
your forearments and your wrists so heavy, yet at the

1195
02:45:09.120 --> 02:45:56.479
same time slight and gentle. Focus Now on your hands,

1196
02:46:18.159 --> 02:46:49.760
my hands, so peaceful in your hands. There's a sense

1197
02:46:49.920 --> 02:47:14.799
of real peace. It just seems to I feel so

1198
02:47:15.159 --> 02:48:23.639
familiar when your hands relax deeply else your fingers A

1199
02:48:24.040 --> 02:49:29.159
thing is sadly you thin it tips moving your attention

1200
02:49:30.520 --> 02:49:59.479
to refront to your body, so comfortable, moving your focus

1201
02:50:01.360 --> 02:51:48.399
tules a muscles in your thighs, your knees so relaxed,

1202
02:52:15.600 --> 02:54:23.879
a carved mussels and just shains co pusy four and

1203
02:54:24.040 --> 02:54:27.399
the faathing and your feet.

1204
02:54:34.079 --> 02:55:24.959
So peaceful, so calm, so peaceful, So calm, so peaceful,

1205
02:55:28.639 --> 02:55:29.879
say calm.

1206
02:55:33.840 --> 02:56:07.319
So peace for RelA sin, peace for s come, allowing

1207
02:56:07.440 --> 02:56:14.639
that deep relaxation to spread your chest, in your stomach,

1208
02:56:27.680 --> 02:56:46.479
letting go of everything. So I'm gonna start counting down

1209
02:56:46.559 --> 02:56:58.040
now from twenty down to one. You can imagine in

1210
02:56:58.079 --> 02:57:03.639
a way it's like this, walking down some steps, and

1211
02:57:03.760 --> 02:57:09.319
each step or twenty steps, and each step represents a

1212
02:57:09.520 --> 02:57:23.120
level of comfort. Each step represents a deepening of that comfort,

1213
02:57:29.719 --> 02:57:35.600
and the furvies you walk down those steps, the deeper

1214
02:57:35.840 --> 03:00:20.040
and more relaxed you feel. So starting with number twenty twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen, sixteen.

1215
03:01:34.719 --> 03:02:18.239
Three four.

1216
03:03:17.840 --> 03:06:35.799
Four see too well five eight.

1217
03:07:40.959 --> 03:10:43.600
Nine eight seven.

1218
03:10:01.760 --> 03:11:58.120
Us six.

1219
03:12:36.440 --> 03:18:30.799
Five four one. And now as you focus on your eyes,

1220
03:18:40.360 --> 03:18:52.079
We're gonna count down from ten douts one, focusing just

1221
03:18:52.319 --> 03:19:00.000
on your eyes, your eyelids, the muscles around your eyes,

1222
03:19:03.319 --> 03:19:11.159
your eye walls themselves, our whole area.

1223
03:19:11.120 --> 03:19:25.120
That makes up your eye. And as we count down

1224
03:19:25.280 --> 03:19:33.639
from ten down to one, whilst focus in on your eyes.

1225
03:19:39.959 --> 03:19:51.959
You'll become twice is relaxed with each number counting down

1226
03:19:55.000 --> 03:20:02.120
that you may find the all you want to do

1227
03:20:02.479 --> 03:20:11.479
is just drift off to sleep. And if that's what

1228
03:20:11.719 --> 03:20:24.440
you want, then just allow yourself to do that. Now,

1229
03:20:27.159 --> 03:20:33.120
focus in on your eyes. I'm going to begin counting

1230
03:20:33.280 --> 03:21:48.840
down from ten down to one right now, ten nine

1231
03:21:51.319 --> 03:23:44.719
eight seven s.

1232
03:24:49.079 --> 03:26:01.000
Five four.

1233
03:27:13.760 --> 03:31:12.399
Three two.

1234
03:29:47.959 --> 03:30:11.520
One two. Counting down from ten to one ten nine eight.

1235
03:30:14.040 --> 03:30:17.120
Seven six.

1236
03:30:19.000 --> 03:30:39.200
Five four three two one. And maybe that was a

1237
03:30:39.239 --> 03:30:43.360
bit too quick in order to relax. Maybe it's a

1238
03:30:43.399 --> 03:30:49.600
bit too fast for you to notice the calming of

1239
03:30:49.639 --> 03:30:56.399
your body, maybe even a little bit of pressure there,

1240
03:30:56.520 --> 03:31:00.079
Like you're counting down from ten to one, which you

1241
03:31:00.200 --> 03:31:03.719
expect me to do, man, expect me to stick gold

1242
03:31:03.879 --> 03:31:06.399
floppy just because.

1243
03:31:06.120 --> 03:31:15.319
You're counting down. We could try it again, but this

1244
03:31:15.520 --> 03:31:17.000
time I go this lower.

1245
03:31:19.079 --> 03:31:23.959
This time, as you focus on the whole of your

1246
03:31:24.000 --> 03:31:32.399
body before we focus on your legs, just notice how

1247
03:31:32.440 --> 03:31:46.559
your body does start to feel more relaxed with every

1248
03:31:46.680 --> 03:32:19.799
number that I count down ten nine eight seven six

1249
03:32:28.200 --> 03:32:54.920
five four three.

1250
03:33:00.399 --> 03:33:31.799
Two one.

1251
03:33:33.079 --> 03:33:38.799
And just notice how how you feel generally, how your

1252
03:33:38.840 --> 03:33:53.239
body feels. It's not necessarily even about ye, counting down

1253
03:33:53.479 --> 03:34:00.200
from ten to one. It's that space that you have, have,

1254
03:34:01.399 --> 03:34:19.879
that space between being active physically or mentally to just

1255
03:34:24.600 --> 03:34:29.799
sitting or lying down, just being there, not doing anything,

1256
03:34:29.959 --> 03:34:36.600
not saying anything, or needing to think about anything. So

1257
03:34:37.280 --> 03:34:40.319
it opens up a space, you know, a bit of

1258
03:34:40.360 --> 03:34:41.520
a space.

1259
03:34:41.959 --> 03:34:42.520
A gap.

1260
03:34:48.680 --> 03:34:52.239
And the more I came down from ten to one,

1261
03:34:53.399 --> 03:35:01.559
the bigger that gap becomes. So there's that gap of calmness,

1262
03:35:02.879 --> 03:35:19.079
of comfort, relaxation. It's a nice feeling, and it moves

1263
03:35:20.120 --> 03:35:34.000
those stresses or discomforts physically or emotionally, moves them away.

1264
03:35:36.840 --> 03:35:38.280
Allows you.

1265
03:35:40.479 --> 03:35:41.079
To just.

1266
03:35:44.000 --> 03:35:50.760
Slow down, someone to count again from ten down to one,

1267
03:35:51.159 --> 03:36:01.399
and notice that gap widening, the gap. And as it widens,

1268
03:36:01.440 --> 03:36:07.520
it's almost like the distress and attention falls into the

1269
03:36:07.559 --> 03:36:25.479
gap and gives you that distance, that space.

1270
03:36:27.799 --> 03:36:33.360
Now ten.

1271
03:36:37.600 --> 03:38:26.360
Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three two one.

1272
03:38:34.479 --> 03:38:38.559
How does your body feel.

1273
03:38:40.440 --> 03:38:52.120
Now?

1274
03:38:53.360 --> 03:38:54.559
Can you notice that?

1275
03:38:55.600 --> 03:39:32.360
Do you feeling calmer, the feeling more relaxed. As we

1276
03:39:32.520 --> 03:39:52.840
now focus on your legs, just your legs, We're just

1277
03:39:52.879 --> 03:40:12.879
gonna start with focusing on your thighs. Of course, it's

1278
03:40:12.959 --> 03:40:21.239
not the most exciting thing to be doing because I'm

1279
03:40:21.360 --> 03:40:24.000
sure like most of your body is not a lot

1280
03:40:24.079 --> 03:40:36.440
going on right now, Just focusing on the whole of

1281
03:40:36.479 --> 03:40:42.959
your thighs, the tops of your thighs, the sides of

1282
03:40:43.040 --> 03:40:49.959
your thighs, the bottoms of your thighs, your outer thighs,

1283
03:40:50.000 --> 03:40:54.879
and your inner thighs. Basically the whole of your thigh

1284
03:40:55.000 --> 03:41:03.799
that leads into your hip and it goes down to

1285
03:41:04.000 --> 03:41:18.040
your knee joint. Now, this is a big area, it's

1286
03:41:18.079 --> 03:41:23.600
a very heavy area. It's very strong, probably the strongest

1287
03:41:24.559 --> 03:41:37.799
muscles in your body or in your thighs. But I

1288
03:41:37.799 --> 03:41:46.239
don't think we perhaps give enough attention to our thighs.

1289
03:41:52.040 --> 03:42:02.799
Perhaps we don't acknowledge how important our thighs are to

1290
03:42:02.959 --> 03:42:23.680
our lives, how much they actually do for us all

1291
03:42:23.680 --> 03:42:34.159
through our lives. And it may seem to sound really weird,

1292
03:42:34.239 --> 03:42:42.680
but I think that all of our body parts, especially

1293
03:42:42.760 --> 03:42:50.399
our thighs, need some TLC, a bit of love shown,

1294
03:42:51.399 --> 03:43:09.600
a bit of acknowledgement, thank you, gratitude for what our

1295
03:43:09.760 --> 03:43:19.120
thighs do for us. And I know this may sound

1296
03:43:19.159 --> 03:43:25.440
a bit strange. Maybe you think, why am I sure

1297
03:43:25.479 --> 03:43:28.040
how I should be out in the garden hugging a

1298
03:43:28.120 --> 03:43:36.479
tree or something. Well, it's hard to set a microphone

1299
03:43:36.600 --> 03:43:39.600
up on a tree. That's why I'm doing this indoors.

1300
03:43:39.680 --> 03:43:43.239
Otherwise I would be outside hugging a tree. Now I

1301
03:43:43.239 --> 03:43:52.000
can't see the television from the tree. If you move

1302
03:43:52.079 --> 03:44:02.000
down to your knees, gaining such an important part, and

1303
03:44:02.040 --> 03:44:06.520
I think we don't necessarily I'll speak for myself here.

1304
03:44:08.959 --> 03:44:14.079
I don't necessarily appreciate all that my needs do for

1305
03:44:14.159 --> 03:44:20.040
me until I have a problem with my knee. It's

1306
03:44:20.079 --> 03:44:25.159
occasionally if I ever, maybe I pash it or it's

1307
03:44:25.319 --> 03:44:31.920
aching for some reason. It's then that I realize how

1308
03:44:32.040 --> 03:44:35.879
much it does. You know, the benefit of being able

1309
03:44:36.000 --> 03:44:44.520
to use my legs without any kind of physical discomfort

1310
03:44:46.120 --> 03:44:53.200
is a beautiful thing that's possibly not appreciated until it's

1311
03:44:53.760 --> 03:45:03.239
temporarily removed. You know that's comfort. But as you focus

1312
03:45:03.280 --> 03:45:11.200
on your knees, regardless of how your knees feel, you

1313
03:45:11.239 --> 03:45:17.079
can have that sense of gratitude and love to your

1314
03:45:17.159 --> 03:45:29.799
knees for all that they do for you. And you

1315
03:45:29.840 --> 03:45:33.760
can still have that attention on your thighs and maybe

1316
03:45:33.920 --> 03:45:40.200
notice how your thighs feel. Maybe you've noticed that they

1317
03:45:41.079 --> 03:45:58.920
are relaxing more deeply as you focus now on the

1318
03:45:58.959 --> 03:46:03.399
bottoms of your legs, your shins, and your calf muscles,

1319
03:46:03.879 --> 03:46:11.600
the bones between your knees and your feet incorporate, and

1320
03:46:11.639 --> 03:46:22.600
of course your ankles so important. You know, anyone that's

1321
03:46:22.639 --> 03:46:28.840
had even like the slightest sprain of an ankle knows

1322
03:46:28.959 --> 03:46:40.959
how how much we take our ankles for granted. And

1323
03:46:41.000 --> 03:46:43.360
it's kind of strange in a way when you think that.

1324
03:46:45.840 --> 03:46:49.840
You know, logically, our wrists are a lot thinner than

1325
03:46:49.920 --> 03:46:54.159
the rest of our arms, which is okay, it doesn't

1326
03:46:54.559 --> 03:46:57.680
I can't see any problem with that because we're just

1327
03:46:57.719 --> 03:47:05.399
picking stuff up. But our ankles so much thinner than

1328
03:47:05.440 --> 03:47:14.559
the rest of our legs, and from a physics perspective

1329
03:47:15.760 --> 03:47:20.000
or logical even it doesn't really make sense that all

1330
03:47:20.079 --> 03:47:28.799
this weight would ultimately be resting on your ankles then

1331
03:47:28.920 --> 03:47:42.079
leading to your feet. That thin area, thin bone. Yeah,

1332
03:47:42.120 --> 03:47:47.879
it does so much great work. Supports us, supports our

1333
03:47:47.920 --> 03:47:59.799
body for a lifetime, helps us to balance, helps you

1334
03:48:00.079 --> 03:48:13.280
to get around and be mobile. And there's the calf muscles.

1335
03:48:13.319 --> 03:48:20.959
Of course, when I was younger, I couldn't see the

1336
03:48:21.000 --> 03:48:26.120
point in calf muscles didn't seem to do anything. Okay,

1337
03:48:27.200 --> 03:48:30.760
if I walked around on tiptoes, then my calf muscles

1338
03:48:30.760 --> 03:48:31.440
get some work.

1339
03:48:32.799 --> 03:48:34.159
But of course that's not true.

1340
03:48:34.239 --> 03:48:38.920
The calf muscles are being used whenever we use our legs,

1341
03:48:44.399 --> 03:48:45.799
and your shins.

1342
03:48:48.559 --> 03:48:50.000
There to protect.

1343
03:48:51.479 --> 03:49:00.760
Your lower legs, shaped in a way almost the protector

1344
03:49:01.159 --> 03:49:15.920
for the bone, leading of course to your ankles and

1345
03:49:16.040 --> 03:49:16.559
your feet.

1346
03:49:21.239 --> 03:49:23.200
But we're not going to focus on your feet. We're

1347
03:49:23.239 --> 03:49:28.000
just going to focus on the legs. I realize.

1348
03:49:29.440 --> 03:49:33.360
That now that I've mentioned your feet, it probably focuses

1349
03:49:33.639 --> 03:49:36.719
on them anyway, So maybe I should focus on your

1350
03:49:36.760 --> 03:49:42.600
feet a little bit. You can have them in your

1351
03:49:42.639 --> 03:49:49.079
awareness the same as you have your thighs in your awareness.

1352
03:49:49.879 --> 03:49:53.840
Even though we haven't been focusing on your thighs a

1353
03:49:53.920 --> 03:50:05.000
few minutes, we've been focusing on your ankles, there's still

1354
03:50:05.079 --> 03:50:15.280
that sensation of comfort in your thighs.

1355
03:50:19.680 --> 03:50:23.799
And this that movement of energy.

1356
03:50:25.479 --> 03:50:32.559
Because the thighs hold lots of different sensations. Of course,

1357
03:50:32.600 --> 03:50:37.399
there's the muscles, the big straw muscles that we have

1358
03:50:37.559 --> 03:50:50.920
in our thighs, but the skin on the outside of

1359
03:50:50.959 --> 03:50:56.319
the thighs, as in the outside of all of our body,

1360
03:50:57.079 --> 03:51:08.680
can be very sensitive, sensitive to the touch, sensitive to temperature,

1361
03:51:15.200 --> 03:51:22.760
and inside your thighs the bones, there's the muscle, there's

1362
03:51:22.799 --> 03:51:27.639
the blood vessels, the arch trees, to all this stuff

1363
03:51:27.719 --> 03:51:36.440
that's inside your thighs. And I guess sometimes it'd be

1364
03:51:36.559 --> 03:51:40.719
nice if you could actually put your fingers inside your

1365
03:51:40.760 --> 03:51:46.920
thighs and a message, so you can message on the outside,

1366
03:51:47.200 --> 03:51:50.159
of course, but to be able to get deep into

1367
03:51:50.200 --> 03:51:55.000
the muscles and to be able to just message inside

1368
03:51:55.040 --> 03:52:02.120
your thighs, message in the bones of your leg massage

1369
03:52:02.120 --> 03:52:11.520
in or the veins and just gently healing your thighs,

1370
03:52:15.280 --> 03:52:20.639
and you could move down massage and inside your knees,

1371
03:52:22.000 --> 03:52:28.840
just message in those bones, but with healing fingertips, spreading

1372
03:52:28.920 --> 03:52:34.760
that healing energy deep into the joints of your knees.

1373
03:52:40.079 --> 03:52:43.760
Of course, there's the back of your your knee, you know,

1374
03:52:43.879 --> 03:52:49.920
the inside crease where your knee is. It's a very

1375
03:52:50.079 --> 03:52:56.120
sensitive area. Very it feels very nice when you stroke it.

1376
03:52:57.399 --> 03:53:00.360
That might be because it's an area that it's not

1377
03:53:00.479 --> 03:53:06.000
really touched very often. It's almost like a hidden part,

1378
03:53:07.360 --> 03:53:10.959
that crease in your legs.

1379
03:53:11.000 --> 03:53:14.760
It's almost it's like a part that.

1380
03:53:16.479 --> 03:53:27.719
Has a sensitivity, which is a little bit different. Of course,

1381
03:53:27.760 --> 03:53:38.319
it's protected by your legs, so you can imagine putting

1382
03:53:39.159 --> 03:53:49.520
your fingers into that crease in your legs. Folding between

1383
03:53:49.559 --> 03:53:54.639
your legs, you can just massage with your fingertips. Imagine

1384
03:53:54.639 --> 03:54:05.719
your fingertips going inside, massage in the muscle tissue. You

1385
03:54:05.760 --> 03:54:10.079
can of course field the the bones of your knees,

1386
03:54:11.399 --> 03:54:21.879
healing through your fingertips. And then as you go down

1387
03:54:24.719 --> 03:54:27.559
to your calf muscles. Now that's the part I'd like

1388
03:54:27.600 --> 03:54:32.319
to be able to really put my fingertips deep inside

1389
03:54:33.079 --> 03:54:42.040
my calf muscles, massage in every single tissue of that muscle,

1390
03:54:43.600 --> 03:54:53.559
healing every part. And then doing the same for my shins,

1391
03:54:56.719 --> 03:55:04.079
massage in and gently stroking the bone bones, gently stroking them,

1392
03:55:04.479 --> 03:55:08.719
healing in a loving way, because they deserve to be

1393
03:55:08.799 --> 03:55:16.040
treated as the precious bones that they are, because our

1394
03:55:16.120 --> 03:55:19.719
legs are so precious as in all the other parts

1395
03:55:19.760 --> 03:55:27.440
of our body, and more precious of any jure on

1396
03:55:27.520 --> 03:55:43.920
the planet. When you start to think about your legs

1397
03:55:44.000 --> 03:55:55.120
in this way, it can change your perspective. It might

1398
03:55:55.280 --> 03:56:01.920
sound a bit a bit silly to start with the

1399
03:56:02.079 --> 03:56:10.280
idea of having love for your legs, showing appreciation for

1400
03:56:10.360 --> 03:56:16.440
your thighs, wanting to be able to put your hands

1401
03:56:17.360 --> 03:56:23.159
in your thighs, the message the muscles.

1402
03:56:23.479 --> 03:56:24.879
And the bones.

1403
03:56:26.120 --> 03:56:31.799
And to get your fingers deep in there, releasing all tension,

1404
03:56:34.680 --> 03:56:36.040
just to show.

1405
03:56:37.280 --> 03:56:38.600
How much you care.

1406
03:56:41.680 --> 03:56:46.799
About your legs, how much you care for what your

1407
03:56:46.879 --> 03:56:56.600
legs do for you regularly, your knees, your calves, your ankles,

1408
03:57:00.840 --> 03:57:08.680
the strength of your ankles, considering how thin they are

1409
03:57:08.719 --> 03:57:12.600
compared to the rest of your legs, especially your thighs.

1410
03:57:16.239 --> 03:57:27.959
Yet they're so strong, so flexible, absolutely amazing things. Your

1411
03:57:28.040 --> 03:57:37.799
ankles are truly a gift because of what they do

1412
03:57:37.879 --> 03:57:49.639
for you, supporting all that weight, regardless of how what

1413
03:57:49.799 --> 03:57:55.799
weight you are, even if you only ate stones, there's

1414
03:57:55.799 --> 03:57:58.879
still a lot of weight for these little ankles.

1415
03:58:02.440 --> 03:58:04.680
Now I'm a lot heavier than eight soon.

1416
03:58:06.120 --> 03:58:15.319
Double down. Yet my ankles support my body all the time,

1417
03:58:19.120 --> 03:58:22.040
or they do give off a sigh of relief when

1418
03:58:22.040 --> 03:58:27.239
I sit down, as I've had my whole legs through

1419
03:58:30.840 --> 03:58:38.399
my feet feet also go my toes clap. I'm so happy.

1420
03:58:57.959 --> 03:59:06.639
Your legs, m really are amazing. And I know that

1421
03:59:07.239 --> 03:59:13.680
about talking about your legs is probably possibly among the

1422
03:59:13.719 --> 03:59:19.319
most most boring things I've ever heard anyone say. Possibly

1423
03:59:22.360 --> 03:59:28.920
or boring or not, everything I said is true. Your

1424
03:59:29.000 --> 03:59:49.600
legs are amazing. Your legs deserve not just respect, they

1425
03:59:49.639 --> 03:59:51.239
deserve to relax.

1426
03:59:52.559 --> 03:59:52.959
Deeply.

1427
03:59:59.760 --> 04:00:03.319
H they deserve to take some time out of the

1428
04:00:03.399 --> 04:00:34.559
day to just let go completely. Your legs really can relax,

1429
04:00:42.159 --> 04:00:46.319
and because the legs are so such a most, you know,

1430
04:00:46.520 --> 04:00:52.520
very important part of your body. When you relax your legs,

1431
04:00:52.559 --> 04:00:59.799
the rest of your body also naturally follows in that

1432
04:01:03.520 --> 04:01:14.399
journey of comfort. I can feel it in my hips.

1433
04:01:15.760 --> 04:01:22.879
My hips feel really loose, and also my lwer back

1434
04:01:22.920 --> 04:01:29.559
as well. My lower back really feels it feels stretched,

1435
04:01:30.680 --> 04:01:33.719
even though I'm just sitting in a chair and there's

1436
04:01:33.799 --> 04:01:35.360
no stretching.

1437
04:01:37.440 --> 04:01:39.079
As far as I'm aware that I'm doing.

1438
04:01:40.079 --> 04:01:42.760
It's almost as if the muscles are just relaxed so

1439
04:01:42.959 --> 04:01:48.920
much that there is a natural stretch as the tension

1440
04:01:49.760 --> 04:02:11.040
has reduced a lot. And I'm now going to count

1441
04:02:11.120 --> 04:02:19.639
down from ten down to one, and you can continue

1442
04:02:20.840 --> 04:02:47.520
to fill wonderfully relaxed ten nine, eight, seven, six, five.

1443
04:02:51.719 --> 04:03:00.559
Four three, Who.

1444
04:03:04.280 --> 04:03:22.239
Why relaxed? So I'm just going to count down from

1445
04:03:22.280 --> 04:03:26.799
five down to one. And as a countdown, if you

1446
04:03:26.920 --> 04:03:33.840
just focus on the numbers, just the numbers counting down,

1447
04:03:34.840 --> 04:03:44.040
and notice how you feel in this moment as you

1448
04:03:44.120 --> 04:03:48.799
hear the numbers counting down, Knowing that those numbers.

1449
04:03:51.239 --> 04:03:53.760
Counting down represents you.

1450
04:03:55.479 --> 04:04:05.479
Feeling calmer, not just in your body, but also relaxing

1451
04:04:05.559 --> 04:04:12.079
your mind. I just notice how you feel there's nothing

1452
04:04:12.799 --> 04:04:18.159
to do, there's nothing to say, there's nothing to think about,

1453
04:04:21.159 --> 04:05:10.159
starting with number five, four, three, two one. And as

1454
04:05:10.200 --> 04:05:22.600
you notice the gradual letting go that the tension in

1455
04:05:22.639 --> 04:05:29.879
your body, you may also begin to notice and be

1456
04:05:30.000 --> 04:05:38.840
aware of how your mind is starting to slow down.

1457
04:05:41.280 --> 04:05:47.680
This is just a natural thing that happens. It's not

1458
04:05:47.840 --> 04:05:53.079
really a special procedure. It's just natural because as your

1459
04:05:54.360 --> 04:06:00.399
body relaxes, your mind also starts to relax. And the

1460
04:06:00.440 --> 04:06:04.159
more your mind relaxes, the more your body relaxes. It's

1461
04:06:04.239 --> 04:06:16.440
just a continuous circle of relaxation. And there's that calmness

1462
04:06:16.520 --> 04:06:23.680
that comes from relative quietness. You know, even even if

1463
04:06:23.719 --> 04:06:31.280
there's background sounds either your side, online, it's still going

1464
04:06:31.399 --> 04:06:36.479
to be quite calm. You know, you haven't got the

1465
04:06:36.520 --> 04:06:41.719
television on, there's no music in the background, unless you're

1466
04:06:41.719 --> 04:06:49.319
listening to the recording. With music, of course, you're very

1467
04:06:49.479 --> 04:06:51.399
likely not going to be sitting in a room with

1468
04:06:51.479 --> 04:06:56.319
other people. Of course you might be, but generally it's

1469
04:06:56.959 --> 04:06:59.239
more ideal if you can do this on your own,

1470
04:07:00.879 --> 04:07:11.040
so no distractions, and when you stop thinking about stuff,

1471
04:07:17.559 --> 04:07:27.840
relaxation automatically rises, a sense of comfort starts to grow,

1472
04:07:32.319 --> 04:07:39.079
and without trying to build it up into something fantastical

1473
04:07:39.399 --> 04:07:51.200
or something magical, this is just a natural process, something

1474
04:07:51.319 --> 04:08:01.559
that's easy to accomplish. In fact, it's all almost you know,

1475
04:08:01.600 --> 04:08:08.479
the sense of relaxing completely happens really when you put

1476
04:08:08.639 --> 04:08:12.559
no effort into it. It's not something that you can

1477
04:08:12.600 --> 04:08:24.600
really force. It's something that happens naturally. And part of

1478
04:08:24.639 --> 04:08:30.639
the process of this recording and others.

1479
04:08:31.840 --> 04:08:33.479
Is simply.

1480
04:08:34.719 --> 04:08:43.920
Two allow you to take advantage of this space.

1481
04:08:46.079 --> 04:08:50.440
This time. It's just.

1482
04:08:54.479 --> 04:08:54.959
Let go.

1483
04:08:57.879 --> 04:09:06.159
To just be here, to be in tune with how

1484
04:09:06.200 --> 04:09:19.600
you feel, yet with the intention of wanting to relax

1485
04:09:19.719 --> 04:09:31.200
deeply and maybe even to fall asleep, depending on what

1486
04:09:31.280 --> 04:09:37.440
it is that you wish for yourself in this moment.

1487
04:09:44.360 --> 04:09:53.760
As we know, relaxing is the majority of the process

1488
04:09:53.879 --> 04:09:59.079
of falling asleep. The actual falling asleep part is the

1489
04:09:59.159 --> 04:10:07.000
tiny bit of the end. The deeper relaxed you become,

1490
04:10:10.920 --> 04:10:12.680
the easier.

1491
04:10:14.879 --> 04:10:15.840
You find.

1492
04:10:17.040 --> 04:10:33.200
Yourself drifting. You can also, if you choose stay focused

1493
04:10:34.239 --> 04:10:58.200
on my voice and really enjoy the process gradually relaxing

1494
04:11:02.479 --> 04:11:29.000
each muscle in your body effortlessly and just observing the

1495
04:11:29.159 --> 04:11:50.360
sensation of letting go completely. This time, I'm going to

1496
04:11:50.479 --> 04:11:59.360
count from six down to one, and you can notice

1497
04:12:00.719 --> 04:12:09.399
your mind calming down more with each number.

1498
04:12:10.639 --> 04:12:12.079
That you hear me.

1499
04:12:12.040 --> 04:13:00.840
Say naturally, feeling calm and slow and peaceful. Sex five.

1500
04:13:20.440 --> 04:15:26.040
Four, three two on being aware of how.

1501
04:15:25.920 --> 04:15:41.719
Your mind to slowed right down, sinking deeply into relaxation.

1502
04:15:55.399 --> 04:16:02.200
And as you focus on your mind, you may notice

1503
04:16:02.440 --> 04:16:11.600
that there are some thoughts still there, maybe some stubborn

1504
04:16:11.760 --> 04:16:27.600
thoughts that for some reason perhaps need your attention. So

1505
04:16:27.639 --> 04:16:36.639
what you can do is send love to those thoughts.

1506
04:16:39.559 --> 04:16:42.239
Sprinkle those thoughts.

1507
04:16:46.280 --> 04:16:47.120
With love.

1508
04:16:48.559 --> 04:16:53.959
Like all petals from a flower. Just sprinkle it over them,

1509
04:16:54.239 --> 04:17:02.479
petals filled with love towards those thoughts. Let those thoughts.

1510
04:17:02.200 --> 04:17:02.639
Know that.

1511
04:17:04.840 --> 04:17:10.319
You're not abandon in them. You just need them. You

1512
04:17:10.440 --> 04:17:22.280
require them to just calm down, slow down, quiet down

1513
04:17:25.879 --> 04:17:37.719
for now. So as you focus on those remaining thoughts,

1514
04:17:38.879 --> 04:17:44.280
as we countdown this time from seven down to one

1515
04:17:44.520 --> 04:17:59.120
with each number, just imagine sprinkling those flower petals of love, kindness,

1516
04:18:00.200 --> 04:18:12.079
gratitude over those thoughts, which will allow them to just

1517
04:18:13.520 --> 04:18:28.559
melt away and relax deeply of every number, those thoughts

1518
04:18:28.639 --> 04:19:37.360
will become more and more relaxed. Starting with number seven, six, five, four,

1519
04:20:03.200 --> 04:21:02.639
three two one.

1520
04:21:00.040 --> 04:21:13.440
Yeah, And as you now.

1521
04:21:17.239 --> 04:21:38.719
Notice how relaxed you're feeling in your body, we're going.

1522
04:21:38.520 --> 04:21:40.360
To focus.

1523
04:21:43.440 --> 04:21:53.079
On your hands, because the more relaxed your hands are,

1524
04:21:55.440 --> 04:22:14.959
the more relaxed your body and mind are. And there's

1525
04:22:16.360 --> 04:22:26.520
you focus on your hands and your fingers. There's nothing

1526
04:22:27.040 --> 04:22:31.760
needed to be done. There's no clenching of fists or

1527
04:22:32.840 --> 04:22:44.280
dancing the fingers or anything like that. It's just noticing

1528
04:22:45.079 --> 04:23:12.719
and focusing on your hands, noticing how they feel. Because

1529
04:23:12.840 --> 04:23:24.159
the more relaxed your hands feel, the calmer your mind feels,

1530
04:23:26.040 --> 04:23:40.319
and the more comfort you feel throughout your body. And

1531
04:23:40.840 --> 04:23:44.079
you may.

1532
04:23:46.239 --> 04:23:51.520
Have already.

1533
04:23:53.680 --> 04:24:33.479
Noticed you mind is starting to dress like sense just

1534
04:24:33.639 --> 04:24:50.799
on your hands and fingers, allowing them to experience a

1535
04:24:51.040 --> 04:24:59.440
real deepening of that relaxation in your hands and fingers,

1536
04:25:05.040 --> 04:25:27.399
more and more relaxed with each number from eight down

1537
04:25:27.479 --> 04:25:40.319
to one. You can almost feel that healing and relaxing

1538
04:25:40.799 --> 04:25:51.760
energy spreading into your hands and fingers, becoming.

1539
04:25:55.600 --> 04:25:57.239
Year and more.

1540
04:25:59.079 --> 04:26:15.920
Relaxing with each number. Ye going down with eight down

1541
04:26:16.639 --> 04:26:45.440
to one, drifting drifting again starting with number eight.

1542
04:27:05.360 --> 04:28:53.120
Seven f four.

1543
04:29:12.360 --> 04:30:31.200
Three.

1544
04:30:32.399 --> 04:30:41.879
Just being here now, nothing to think about, nothing to do,

1545
04:30:43.319 --> 04:30:57.639
nothing to say, and everything just feels calm. This is

1546
04:30:58.680 --> 04:31:07.479
your natural state of being. This is how you just normally.

1547
04:31:07.200 --> 04:31:15.559
Feel when you take away all that other stuff that

1548
04:31:15.680 --> 04:31:18.680
we add, you know, things like.

1549
04:31:18.959 --> 04:31:35.280
Stress and worrying and overthinking, anxiety, tension, just generally thinking

1550
04:31:35.319 --> 04:31:36.040
about stuff.

1551
04:31:38.280 --> 04:31:41.559
You take that away, which is what we do.

1552
04:31:42.159 --> 04:31:43.479
What we do now.

1553
04:31:49.479 --> 04:32:00.760
You're left with a real sense of peacefulness, which comes

1554
04:32:00.840 --> 04:32:10.239
to you very quickly, because ultimately it's just a feeling,

1555
04:32:14.600 --> 04:32:23.000
a feeling of comfort, almost as if you've gone inside

1556
04:32:23.000 --> 04:32:35.200
yourself and you've found a special place where everything is peaceful,

1557
04:32:38.120 --> 04:32:44.120
a place where you can feel relaxed and your natural.

1558
04:32:45.680 --> 04:32:51.040
Sense of comfort, a place where.

1559
04:32:50.799 --> 04:33:00.319
You can be you, where you can accept yourself for

1560
04:33:00.440 --> 04:33:07.639
who you are, the place where you're not trying to

1561
04:33:07.759 --> 04:33:18.479
please anybody else ever, the place where you can actually.

1562
04:33:21.319 --> 04:33:22.560
Not just love.

1563
04:33:22.439 --> 04:33:27.639
Yourself, but in some ways more importantly, you can like

1564
04:33:27.959 --> 04:33:48.159
yourself appreciate who you are. That sense of gratitude is

1565
04:33:48.240 --> 04:33:58.439
in the air all around you, and that's also a

1566
04:33:58.520 --> 04:34:08.680
place where you can actually feel the healing energy soaking

1567
04:34:09.000 --> 04:34:26.599
into your body. Healing energy soaking into your body, and

1568
04:34:26.759 --> 04:34:36.159
that healing energy spreads through your veins, traveling to each

1569
04:34:37.200 --> 04:34:48.319
and every single part of your body, and you start

1570
04:34:48.400 --> 04:34:52.200
to realize that actually that healing.

1571
04:34:51.919 --> 04:34:56.919
Energy, it's not just entered into your.

1572
04:34:56.759 --> 04:35:07.959
Brain, become part of your brain, and that.

1573
04:35:08.200 --> 04:35:20.080
Spinal fluid is now mixed with healing energy, not just

1574
04:35:22.200 --> 04:35:28.680
allowing you to feel so much more relaxed and healthy

1575
04:35:30.200 --> 04:35:41.680
in this moment, but also you start to realize to actually,

1576
04:35:44.119 --> 04:35:53.159
what's happening now with that healing, relaxing energy spreading through

1577
04:35:53.240 --> 04:36:06.080
your body, it's actually changing your life. It's actually changing

1578
04:36:06.159 --> 04:36:11.360
the way you're going to feel, not just now, but

1579
04:36:11.439 --> 04:36:21.799
tomorrow and the next day. There's your health improves, not

1580
04:36:21.919 --> 04:36:29.439
just your physical health, but your mental health. Things that

1581
04:36:29.840 --> 04:36:34.599
used to bother you in the past, for some reason,

1582
04:36:35.799 --> 04:36:43.360
no longer have the effect that they used to because

1583
04:36:43.479 --> 04:36:55.119
something has changed deep within you. Maybe things that used

1584
04:36:55.200 --> 04:37:00.000
to cause you to feel anger.

1585
04:37:03.400 --> 04:37:10.799
No longer have that power to control you.

1586
04:37:13.200 --> 04:37:19.520
The way they seem to be able to before. As

1587
04:37:19.639 --> 04:37:31.159
you realize that you're the one who decides what affects you,

1588
04:37:34.799 --> 04:37:45.200
You're the one who decides to feel relaxed and calm

1589
04:37:45.240 --> 04:38:01.319
when you choose to enjoy noticing these natural developments of healing,

1590
04:38:03.880 --> 04:38:12.479
continuing to grow and improve your life day by day,

1591
04:38:18.319 --> 04:38:26.599
including of course your ability to relax so much easier

1592
04:38:31.560 --> 04:38:41.720
and sleeping. It's the most natural thing in the world

1593
04:38:42.560 --> 04:38:50.880
to you, because falling asleep is something that you've done

1594
04:38:53.919 --> 04:38:55.560
so many times.

1595
04:38:56.880 --> 04:39:02.479
In your life, and you know that you were born,

1596
04:39:04.000 --> 04:39:05.000
as we all were.

1597
04:39:05.680 --> 04:39:17.000
With the ability to fall asleep naturally. We're born with

1598
04:39:17.520 --> 04:39:23.799
that ability to just drift.

1599
04:39:25.279 --> 04:39:29.959
Off into a deep, healing sleep.

1600
04:39:35.959 --> 04:39:40.720
Even when we're kids, sometimes we'll fall asleep and we

1601
04:39:40.799 --> 04:39:47.000
don't even want to try telling us stay awake. Maybe

1602
04:39:47.119 --> 04:39:50.439
it's a birthday in the morning, or it's Christmas or

1603
04:39:51.319 --> 04:39:53.279
holiday or something we look forward to.

1604
04:39:53.880 --> 04:39:57.919
We don't want to go to sleep. But the more

1605
04:39:58.520 --> 04:40:03.400
you want to stay awake, the more we just start

1606
04:40:03.479 --> 04:40:04.040
to drift.

1607
04:40:08.200 --> 04:40:10.200
And the more you fight.

1608
04:40:10.400 --> 04:40:13.759
Drifting, the more you try to stop yourself from drift

1609
04:40:13.840 --> 04:40:19.680
in a safe the deeper and stronger that drifting becomes.

1610
04:40:26.639 --> 04:40:31.919
Because we're born not just with the need to relax

1611
04:40:32.080 --> 04:40:40.479
deeply and to naturally fall asleep, but it's our birthright

1612
04:40:43.840 --> 04:40:54.200
as part of our DNA, And sometimes as we get

1613
04:40:54.279 --> 04:41:05.040
older in life, perhaps at times we have gotten that

1614
04:41:05.319 --> 04:41:21.520
relaxing completely. It's not only a wonderfully pleasant experience, it's

1615
04:41:21.560 --> 04:41:23.279
also really easy.

1616
04:41:34.680 --> 04:41:37.840
It's very very easy.

1617
04:41:38.799 --> 04:41:43.159
To let go, because that's all it is. It's just.

1618
04:41:46.680 --> 04:41:58.119
Deciding to let go. And when you press the play

1619
04:41:58.240 --> 04:42:06.400
button on my recordings, you have given permission.

1620
04:42:08.200 --> 04:42:11.400
For my voice to relax you.

1621
04:42:15.080 --> 04:42:18.639
When you press that play button, you have given me

1622
04:42:18.799 --> 04:42:30.520
permission for my words to effect you in a positive,

1623
04:42:33.959 --> 04:42:40.680
only a positive way. Opening up.

1624
04:42:45.799 --> 04:42:46.720
Your mind.

1625
04:42:48.240 --> 04:43:09.000
Too useful and healing suggestions that can have such an

1626
04:43:09.080 --> 04:43:21.319
amazing effect on how you feel right now, as well

1627
04:43:24.119 --> 04:43:31.959
as those changes that continue long after the recording ends,

1628
04:43:33.720 --> 04:43:42.840
those changes within you that continue to flourish and grow,

1629
04:43:47.400 --> 04:44:01.080
transforming your life in a positive, beautiful way, allowing you

1630
04:44:01.720 --> 04:44:07.919
to move forward in your life in the direction that

1631
04:44:08.279 --> 04:44:25.439
you choose for yourself. And this feeling, this feeling that

1632
04:44:25.639 --> 04:44:41.759
you can experience of safety, comfort, calmness, This feels so nice.

1633
04:44:51.040 --> 04:45:03.759
It's such a healthy place to be, and that positivity

1634
04:45:05.159 --> 04:45:23.880
grows within you each and every day. Moving forward, you

1635
04:45:24.279 --> 04:45:35.080
had to find that you're more relaxed physically and in

1636
04:45:35.200 --> 04:45:44.000
your mind is more relaxed. And it's not that you're

1637
04:45:44.200 --> 04:45:49.759
thinking slower, it's just that your mind would be less

1638
04:45:50.599 --> 04:46:02.240
unlocked up with unnecessary negativity, because from now on, your

1639
04:46:02.439 --> 04:46:12.200
mind rejects negativity. From now on, you're going to start

1640
04:46:12.439 --> 04:46:28.759
noticing when negativity arises. You can just say stop, stop,

1641
04:46:31.639 --> 04:46:33.599
and then negativity.

1642
04:46:35.279 --> 04:46:38.360
Will turn around and leave you alone.

1643
04:46:46.360 --> 04:46:53.040
Stop and then negativity.

1644
04:46:55.439 --> 04:46:56.319
Will disappear.

1645
04:47:04.479 --> 04:47:10.959
And as you notice that you feel way more relaxed

1646
04:47:12.400 --> 04:47:14.319
than you probably expected.

1647
04:47:20.479 --> 04:47:21.560
You can now.

1648
04:47:24.959 --> 04:47:30.840
Congratulate yourself because you're the person that has done this.

1649
04:47:32.560 --> 04:47:38.040
You are the one that has opened your mind up

1650
04:47:38.759 --> 04:47:46.799
to the simple facts, and you can feel more relaxed

1651
04:47:46.919 --> 04:47:47.919
in your body.

1652
04:47:48.360 --> 04:47:49.240
And in your mind.

1653
04:47:55.479 --> 04:48:01.040
You've opened your mind up to the birthright of.

1654
04:48:01.200 --> 04:48:02.200
Being able to just.

1655
04:48:04.880 --> 04:48:09.560
Fall asleep easily when you choose.

1656
04:48:18.279 --> 04:48:25.400
And that's a nice feeling, don't you think it's nice?

1657
04:48:25.479 --> 04:48:25.919
Doesn't it.

1658
04:48:29.000 --> 04:48:36.040
To feel calm, full, the healing energy spreading through your

1659
04:48:36.119 --> 04:48:49.360
body in your mind, to spend time a special place

1660
04:48:49.799 --> 04:49:04.840
where negativity can no longer enter. H Negativity is bad,

1661
04:49:05.919 --> 04:49:14.240
It's bad, it's not allowed. Entrigue doesn't doesn't. This doesn't

1662
04:49:14.439 --> 04:49:22.439
deserve to be here, doesn't belong here. Negativity has no

1663
04:49:22.759 --> 04:49:37.919
place in your life, which makes room for more comfort,

1664
04:49:39.880 --> 04:49:50.040
more healing, more relaxation, more peace.

1665
04:50:07.159 --> 04:50:08.439
Fee's nice, doesn't it?

1666
04:50:10.279 --> 04:50:14.479
Just the let go.

1667
04:50:18.159 --> 04:50:36.799
Everything m the count down now from twenty down to one.

1668
04:50:40.240 --> 04:50:43.080
He can continue to relax.

1669
04:50:44.759 --> 04:50:52.520
If he choose, you can create to sleep.

1670
04:50:55.799 --> 04:50:57.240
A definite number.

1671
04:50:59.360 --> 04:51:00.639
He's hidden, say.

1672
04:51:04.720 --> 04:51:05.799
You can fill.

1673
04:51:06.759 --> 04:51:14.720
Twice is relaxed, or you choose you can feelwice is

1674
04:51:14.919 --> 04:52:12.360
sleeping now twenty nineteen, eighteen, seventeen sixte fifty thing.

1675
04:52:18.840 --> 04:52:29.159
More to.

1676
04:52:46.319 --> 04:52:54.360
Left two.

1677
04:53:01.959 --> 04:53:10.759
Nine eight.

1678
04:53:27.200 --> 04:53:43.639
Six one.

1679
04:54:17.000 --> 04:54:27.560
It's your time. Just take a break, your time.

1680
04:54:27.560 --> 04:54:36.000
To relax, to allow.

1681
04:54:35.840 --> 04:54:48.080
Your mind to slow down, to give yourself.

1682
04:54:47.680 --> 04:55:00.400
Permission to take a break from freething.

1683
04:55:05.080 --> 04:55:09.560
Thank you the only person I can make that decision.

1684
04:55:12.479 --> 04:55:14.639
You're the only person that can actually.

1685
04:55:14.439 --> 04:55:15.360
Tell your mine.

1686
04:55:20.360 --> 04:55:29.799
Just reacts to just.

1687
04:55:33.439 --> 04:55:46.919
Take some time so that you can focus on body.

1688
04:55:47.919 --> 04:55:51.840
I think, and don't you how you fell.

1689
04:55:53.240 --> 04:56:08.840
Pusy And in the process of this body scan where

1690
04:56:09.000 --> 04:56:19.840
you focus on different parts of every body, those parts

1691
04:56:20.400 --> 04:56:26.759
you focus on and observed, even though you're.

1692
04:56:26.639 --> 04:56:31.360
Not purpose be requesting.

1693
04:56:32.919 --> 04:56:39.080
For those parts you're putting to relax. It's kind of expected.

1694
04:56:40.720 --> 04:56:50.560
You expect when you listen to your voice to fear naturally,

1695
04:56:56.080 --> 04:57:05.000
because when you're listening to me, attention, it's focused.

1696
04:57:06.240 --> 04:57:07.119
On my words.

1697
04:57:12.279 --> 04:57:23.680
It is my words I you focus on those parts

1698
04:57:23.759 --> 04:58:14.319
of the body, focus increases. Actually, as to words, waxss

1699
04:58:14.439 --> 04:58:38.520
down sported the bus.

1700
04:58:49.360 --> 04:58:52.439
That nic sport.

1701
04:58:58.880 --> 04:59:13.040
OUs y. What features the book

1702
04:59:26.240 --> 04:59:26.279
The