Aug. 25, 2025

(no music) (5 hours) How my brother ruined my 8th Birthday | LMBYTS #1422 | Jason Newland | 25th August 2025

(no music) (5 hours) How my brother ruined my 8th Birthday | LMBYTS #1422 | Jason Newland | 25th August 2025
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In this special birthday edition of Let Me Bore You To Sleep (#1422), Jason Newland reflects on the day his younger brother was born—the day before his 8th birthday—and how it completely changed the spotlight on his big day. With his trademark mix of humor, rambling stories, and light-hearted complaints, Jason shares childhood memories, family anecdotes, and the unique way birthdays shaped his life. As always, the meandering storytelling is designed to relax, distract, and gently lull you into a calm, sleepy state. Perfect for anyone who enjoys a blend of nostalgia, silliness, and soothing background chatter before drifting off to sleep.

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/hypnosis-for-sleeping-deeply--6340116/support.

WEBVTT

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Hello, and welcome to Jasonnewland dot com. My name's Jason

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new Land. This is let me buoy to sleep LM

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LMB white Yes, LLMB white Yes, yeah, mis lebitz.

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Yeah.

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So it is Monday, the twenty fifth of August two

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thousand and twenty five. Hello, Hello, it's my brother's birthday

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today and tomorrow Tuesday, the twenty six of August twenty

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twenty five. It's my birthday, my.

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Mine, mine.

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So yeah, I will be tomorrow fifty five years old,

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fifty five, fifty fifty five, even if you say a

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quick least it sounds old, yep, fifty five. As I

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got my hand on top of my head, really feeling

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the temperature difference in my bald spot. It's weird and like, ugh,

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I wonder, I'm not sure if I wonder if I

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have any hair by the time I'm sixty five. So yeah,

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so it's my brother was born well now clearly was

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born the day before my birthday when I was I

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turned eight. So basically he was born the day before

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my eighth birthday. And I remember that quite clearly. Yeah,

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so I'll tell you about that in a minute. Oh yeah,

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I got uncle sausages funeral on Thursday at nine thirty,

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So that's going to be a weird one. But I

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do still intend to do a Q and A Friday

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This Friday. I need to post a question thing on

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faith book. I had a lot of questions last time

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last Friday, lots and lots of questions. So I'm gonna

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if I remember, I will post that. I could do

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it now while I'm thinking about No, I can't because

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there's no Internet on my phone because I always put

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it onto Yeah, I put it onto what's it called

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airplane boot mode so I don't get disturbed by all

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the millions of phone calls that I get on a

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daily basis me. So yeah, I'll do that after this.

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So it's bank Collored in Monday here in the British

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Isles of the UK England Commonwealth, and it's a nice

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day outside. It's really nice, little bit of wind which

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is good. It's fairly hot there, very sunny. What he

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took Vinnie out earlier about seven o'clock ish have call

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s He barked at a couple of dogs like he does.

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I missed the old days when he was really like

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when he was ten months old and I first got him.

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He was happy to see every single dog excited. He

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just wanted to run up to them and be friends.

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He's not like that anymore. He's got the dogs that

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he's friends with, and anyone new he's not particularly interested in,

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and especially the big dogs. He doesn't like big dogs,

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or generally black dogs. But he's got a couple of

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black dog friends, so he's not completely racist, but he's

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definitely you know, he's got a thing about sheep dogs,

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what they call colliers or whatever they're called. Yet one

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of his good friends is a collier. It's I can't

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figure him out, really, So I'm not a big fan

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of him doing it anytime, but not early in the

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morning or late at night. Just not not really don't

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really enjoy that. It's because some people like he did it.

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Yesterday we turned a corner and there was someone there

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have a dog and did he's barking, and both the

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people the dog would give me funny looks like it's

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just a dog. He's barking. That's what dogs do. Man.

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But you know, I could be responsible for him up

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to a limit. You know, he's on a lead, he

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can't do any mischief. But as far as barking. He's

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going to do that. He's a dog, that's what you know.

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I can't stop him from barking. I try and stop him,

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and I'm usually able to calm him down. But ultimately,

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if he decides to start barking, which I think is

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kind of automatic behavior, he doesn't plan it. He's not

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got a little alarm goes off on his on his

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watch that tells him all time to bark. No, it's

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just an automatic response to outside stimuli. I'm guessing I

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don't know where he is. He's on the floor somewhere.

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He came in licking his lips. So I've got some food,

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got some water or change his waterever because he was

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in a bedroom with his water in his food, did

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not touch his food from last night. So I've given

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him some new food. Put it out. I haven't got

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anywhere near it. And I think he's just done a

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big fart. Wit. No, it wasn't me, it was him.

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If it was me, it was a silent one. But

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normally even if it's silent, you know, just still feel

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the air. Bad, bad, bad. So yeah, it's another week,

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another week in August. It's the last week of August,

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I do believe. So what we've got twenty six tomorrow,

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just Tuesday, my birthday, fifty five, twenty seventh, on Wednesday,

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twenty third, on Thursday, twenty third, Wow, twenty six, twenty seven, Wednesday,

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twenty eighth, Thursday, twenty ninth, Friday, thirtieth, Saturday Day, very

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first Sunday, and the first of September will be next

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Monday in a week's time. So, yeah, that was a

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bit pointless, really, wasn't. I just reading out the numbers

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of the days. The weird thing is, I just really

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enjoyed doing it, and I don't know why. I don't know. Yeah,

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I haven't really done much today, although it's still fairly early.

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It's only eleven twenty five in the morning. I mean recently,

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I have been doing recordings a little bit earlier than this,

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but it's been relatively quiet outside, so I thought, oh,

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maybe i'll make a recording. There's not much screaming and shouting,

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and you know, ding dong was going on out there.

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Plus one two three four one two four Our six

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of the flats in this building are empty at the

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moment today. Anyway, one's on holiday. I think one's gone

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away for the weekend or so. I don't know. I

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haven't seen them because I put some black bags out

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there out the front for them. There's a little gift

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and they haven't brought it in, so I guess they're

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not around. And then one downstairs on a holiday, and

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then they have two flats that are empty anyway, So

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there's only me and downstairs that they're here today, So

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pretty quiet and I don't make much noise generally, I'm

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fairly fairly useful neighbor. I would, I would, I think,

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I hope. So I have asked intermittently my neighbor downstairs

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just to make sure that I'm being quiet enough, because

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I don't, you know, I don't want to be one

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of those noisy neighbors. That's alwayst like my worst scenario.

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Just yeah, other than having a really noisy neighbor has

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to that's that's up higher than that, you know, so hmmm, yeah,

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the weakerheads looking well, I don't really do anything on

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my birthday anymore.

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I used to.

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I used to celebrate my birthday every single year, not

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as in like having a birthday celebration like party or

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anything like that. I'm talking about as an adult when

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I was a kid, I used to have parties. I think, yeah,

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pretty much. But as an adult, most of the time,

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when I was in London, I would take the day

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off on my birthday. I'd go up to the West

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End and just chill out. I'll become I suppose, like

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a tourist for the day and I'd go and eat out,

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and I'd go and I'd be on my own every

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single time, and I'll just, you know, just go to

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the West End. I would look around, go into the bookshops,

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maybe buy a book, go and get McDonald's. I saw

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her an advert or saw an advert on TV for McDonald's.

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And now they're using the term Mackie d for McDonald's,

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which just shows you how how slow companies are to

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use because I heard that term when I like twenty

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five years ago, people talking about Macky D's. So now

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McDonald's just realized that people use that term. I personally

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don't use that term because it's McDonald's. I did the

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idea of actually making a cute name for something that's

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so harmful for me, you know, I mean McDonald's. Okay.

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I used to like McDonald's used to be a treat.

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Now it's I would have. I would go to McDonald's

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if there was nothing else to eat. It would be

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a last resort. I think i'd even choose a sausage

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roll over McDonald's meal. Generally, yes, it's if I'm in

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the middle of somewhere and I've got no other food.

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I'll go to McDonald's only if there's McDonald's there, because

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otherwise I wouldn't be able to go, would I.

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No.

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Oh, So my birthday, my birthday, my birthday, My my birthday,

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my birthday, my birthday, Oh fifty five? How many birthdays

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I can remember? I can't remember last year. Well, birthdays

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stand out in my life. Okay, the first birthday I

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call was when I was living in Newcastle in a

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children's home, and I come down. I've told this story before,

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but I come downstairs because my birthday was always during

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the summer holidays when I was at school, so right

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from being I don't know when I first went to school.

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I don't know what age I was, but I never

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had to do anything on my birthday until I started working.

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And then when I got to my twenties, I kind

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of decided I'm not working on my birthday. Anymore. So, Yeah,

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my first birthday recollection. Because I didn't know what my

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birthday was. I didn't know how old I was back then,

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so I guessed and I was probably about five. And

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I come downstairs. I'm late, must have slept in or something.

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I go into the canteen. Because the the Children's Home

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in Newcastle was a lot better than the Children's Home

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in South End where I ended up. It was it

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was just nicer though. The place was nicer as far

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as brighter and where we ate. It was like a

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conservatory thing and I don't know, it was just a

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nicer and it was all surrounded by fields and you

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know the play area, big play field with swings and stuff. Yeah. Anyway,

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I so I come down and I'm sitting at the

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table and someone says, oh, happy birthday. I said, okay,

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I had no idea it was my birthday. Neither did they.

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I mean obviously I did, because they just said happy birthday.

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And because I know I had that conversation with him.

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I said, how do you that's my birthday? And she

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said I didn't. I said, well, you just told me

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happy birthday. How can you say happy birthday if you

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didn't know it's my birthday. She said, well, I could

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just be making it up and I could say happy

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birthday to anyone at any time, you know. But I said,

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what are you you making up? And she said no,

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I'm not. I said, okay, well, how come how do

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you know it's my birthday? Then she said because your

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mom came around. I said really, I said, yeah, your

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mom turned up. I said, okay, where was she now?

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She didn't stop. Okay, she didn't stop, she did, why

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didn't you wake me up?

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Oh?

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She couldn't stop. Okay. So I said, okay, a lot

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back then, and I said all right, and she said

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then the lady said, well, she left you a present.

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I said, I really, and she gave it to me.

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It was a box of mare teesers, like one of

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the bigger boxes. And I love not what I love

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more teasers still do. So oh and that was it.

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That was my birthday, and that's her first birthday. I

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remember having really knowing what her birthday was. Now, the

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next time I had a birthday, I couldn't tell you.

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I mean, I know it was a year later, but

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I couldn't tell you. I don't remember a specific celebration

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of any particular birthday year, probably until I was eight,

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so I remember that birthday. So we'd been living we

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just moved into, not just moved in, but I hadn't

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been long. We've been living in this house, which was

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a new build on a council estate, which my nana

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Grande moved into as well. Once we moved out in

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I don't know, nineteen eighty eight or summer time. Yeah,

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just in time. Yeah, it's probably just in time for

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me to move into. We moved into new house and

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I started a new school in September. So yeah, that's it. Yeah,

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that's right. So the day before my eighth birthday, the

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twenty fifth, which is today, I don't even know how

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many years ago, forty something, forty three, No, forty seven

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years ago. So my little brother is now forty seven.

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He's getting old, an't he? So forty seven years ago

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today I was see in our house we had and

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I don't know why, and it's really it caused problems

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for my name as well. She fell down these steps

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that I fell down, and they put a ramp up

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in the end. My dad and whatever. It was ridiculous,

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like these big steps and each step was pretty much

228
00:19:56.160 --> 00:19:59.200
as high up up to my knee, and when I

229
00:19:59.200 --> 00:20:01.319
was only two inches tall at the time, but still

230
00:20:01.720 --> 00:20:09.119
big steps to get into the back door. And it's

231
00:20:09.359 --> 00:20:11.720
it's I think it's because the house was kind of

232
00:20:11.759 --> 00:20:15.240
on a bit of a slope and the ground hadn't

233
00:20:15.359 --> 00:20:18.400
settled yet, because it was on a new bit of land,

234
00:20:19.480 --> 00:20:21.480
well not on a new bit of land, and land's

235
00:20:21.480 --> 00:20:25.480
probably been there for millions of years, but depending on

236
00:20:25.519 --> 00:20:36.799
which book you read. And I I fell downstairs that

237
00:20:37.039 --> 00:20:41.359
my stepmom was heavily pregnant. I mean, the fact is

238
00:20:41.400 --> 00:20:42.960
she had a baby that day, so she must have

239
00:20:43.000 --> 00:20:47.519
been quite heavily pregnant. And she comes out to help me.

240
00:20:48.640 --> 00:20:53.400
So I falked down the stairs and I'm crying where

241
00:20:55.880 --> 00:20:58.519
my dad comes out and oh, you've had the baby already,

242
00:20:58.960 --> 00:21:03.359
and he realizes it's just me. I was still a baby,

243
00:21:03.400 --> 00:21:06.559
that's what. That's the day I stopped being a baby.

244
00:21:08.799 --> 00:21:11.039
It's kind of weird. I got to be a baby

245
00:21:11.240 --> 00:21:18.200
for a year pretty much. I had a whole year

246
00:21:18.240 --> 00:21:22.559
of being the baby, being the youngest. I know I

247
00:21:22.599 --> 00:21:26.039
was young. I was youngest for the first eight years,

248
00:21:26.440 --> 00:21:28.799
but that's it's only between seven and eight that I

249
00:21:28.920 --> 00:21:34.119
was actually treated like a human, I think. So I

250
00:21:34.119 --> 00:21:36.279
got to be a baby and act like a baby

251
00:21:36.480 --> 00:21:40.720
and be all I don't know, babyish, I guess I

252
00:21:40.759 --> 00:21:45.039
don't mean a baby baby. I wasn't like wearing nappies

253
00:21:45.079 --> 00:21:49.799
and going gega googo, not that babies generally go gega

254
00:21:49.839 --> 00:21:58.559
goo goo, BUTKA like that. I wasn't doing that, but

255
00:21:58.680 --> 00:22:03.400
I was, you know, I was. My dad would carry

256
00:22:03.440 --> 00:22:08.480
me on his shoulders and we were walking around and

257
00:22:09.640 --> 00:22:14.200
I would sit on my stepmom's lap and cuddle up

258
00:22:14.200 --> 00:22:17.279
to her like I was a little baby. Yeah, it

259
00:22:17.319 --> 00:22:20.359
was good. I liked it. But then my little brother

260
00:22:20.480 --> 00:22:26.200
was born and he ruined everything, absolutely ruined it, and

261
00:22:29.119 --> 00:22:32.279
I suddenly had to start acting I suppose my age

262
00:22:32.359 --> 00:22:35.319
really But it was good. It was good for a year,

263
00:22:37.119 --> 00:22:48.039
kind of, was it. Yeah. I remember once I was

264
00:22:48.079 --> 00:22:52.559
thinking because my dad said, oh, you get a bit

265
00:22:52.599 --> 00:22:55.359
too heavy now for me to carry you on my shoulders,

266
00:22:55.960 --> 00:22:57.920
so I'm probably not gonna be able to do it anymore.

267
00:22:58.279 --> 00:23:02.799
And I thought, hmmm, So what I did is I

268
00:23:02.839 --> 00:23:06.200
put super glue on my bum and my on my legs.

269
00:23:06.759 --> 00:23:09.359
Well I was wearing trousers but super clue on them,

270
00:23:09.640 --> 00:23:13.000
and I thought that'd work. But it didn't. He just

271
00:23:13.039 --> 00:23:23.319
took his shirt off and we didn't talk about it again. Yeah,

272
00:23:23.839 --> 00:23:30.200
the people in a restaurant weren't too pleased. That doesn't

273
00:23:30.240 --> 00:23:33.680
make sense. What do you mean the people in the restaurant.

274
00:23:34.519 --> 00:23:36.960
Why would you be on your dad's shoulders in a restaurant?

275
00:23:37.319 --> 00:23:39.200
I don't know. It makes sense when I said it,

276
00:23:39.240 --> 00:23:41.119
But then once I said that, I realized it didn't

277
00:23:41.119 --> 00:23:45.680
make sense, and instead of moving on, I actually highlighted

278
00:23:45.680 --> 00:23:49.400
the fact that what I just said made no no

279
00:23:49.519 --> 00:23:50.200
sense at all.

280
00:23:51.880 --> 00:23:54.599
You can't think of any other words that mean sense,

281
00:23:54.720 --> 00:23:57.920
can you? So you just keep using the same words sense.

282
00:24:00.599 --> 00:24:05.039
Yeah I noticed that as well. Thanks, it's okay. I'm

283
00:24:05.039 --> 00:24:13.119
here to help. Yeah, cheers didn't make any didn't seem relevant,

284
00:24:13.200 --> 00:24:16.160
didn't make any kind of sense. No, see, she'll keep

285
00:24:16.160 --> 00:24:21.279
coming back to words since anyway, I fell over, not

286
00:24:21.359 --> 00:24:23.400
on purpose, you know. I bashed my knee on the

287
00:24:23.480 --> 00:24:34.279
concrete floor. It hurts, and I cried like that, and

288
00:24:35.119 --> 00:24:40.039
probably about a lot louder. Although I got quite a

289
00:24:40.119 --> 00:24:48.319
quiet voice, I can shout really loud. You'd be surprised you. Honestly,

290
00:24:49.559 --> 00:24:53.200
I can really shout loud if I need to. But

291
00:24:53.440 --> 00:24:56.319
the whole estate would hear me if I showered my loudest.

292
00:24:57.680 --> 00:25:00.920
I don't know why. It's my little superpowered I keep quiet.

293
00:25:01.440 --> 00:25:05.400
I keep it to myself. Plus there's no apparent reason

294
00:25:06.160 --> 00:25:14.480
to use it. And yeah, so I've fallen. I've fallen

295
00:25:14.480 --> 00:25:19.880
over off the step, a very unsafe step. Really not

296
00:25:19.920 --> 00:25:24.039
a good idea to have us two steps, in fact,

297
00:25:24.680 --> 00:25:31.880
two concrete steps to get into the back door. It

298
00:25:32.200 --> 00:25:34.720
just I don't know, personally, I think it was a

299
00:25:34.720 --> 00:25:40.920
bad idea and a big fault in the building structure.

300
00:25:41.200 --> 00:25:45.079
It just wasn't It's a nice house. It was my

301
00:25:45.119 --> 00:25:48.799
favorite house of all time. And if I could live anywhere,

302
00:25:48.839 --> 00:25:54.680
it'd be there in that house. You know, it'd have

303
00:25:54.759 --> 00:25:56.759
to be like it was when my men lived there.

304
00:25:58.039 --> 00:26:01.519
I wouldn't change a thing. I keep it the same.

305
00:26:02.319 --> 00:26:04.759
But unfortunately she moved out. She had to move out,

306
00:26:04.799 --> 00:26:11.480
and yeah, into a care home, and not a care

307
00:26:11.559 --> 00:26:20.039
home that was sheltered them sheltered sheltered residential accommodation is

308
00:26:20.039 --> 00:26:27.599
that what it's called. She had her own flat and

309
00:26:27.759 --> 00:26:31.480
with I don't know how many other people, fifty sixty hundred,

310
00:26:31.480 --> 00:26:35.119
I don't know, everyone had their own flats, and she'd

311
00:26:35.200 --> 00:26:38.279
go in as you as you walked basically as you

312
00:26:38.359 --> 00:26:44.319
walk in the main thing. I think it was locked sometimes.

313
00:26:44.519 --> 00:26:49.799
But if you walk in and there's this big area

314
00:26:50.000 --> 00:26:54.400
room where sometimes they'd congregate and play big go and

315
00:26:54.480 --> 00:27:02.680
cricket or whatever else hopscotch, and I don't know why

316
00:27:02.759 --> 00:27:08.519
that's funny, And then turn right. It wasn't funny. Okay, stop,

317
00:27:08.559 --> 00:27:12.440
I don't need this. You're not helping anymore.

318
00:27:11.680 --> 00:27:12.359
Not trying to.

319
00:27:13.680 --> 00:27:18.039
Oh it's a turn right down there, one, two, three

320
00:27:18.240 --> 00:27:21.839
four on the right, that was where her door was.

321
00:27:23.480 --> 00:27:27.440
I couldn't tell you what number it was. I do

322
00:27:27.519 --> 00:27:28.000
what number?

323
00:27:28.000 --> 00:27:28.400
I do what?

324
00:27:28.559 --> 00:27:31.920
I didn't look. I remember the numbers of the two

325
00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:35.480
houses I lived in when I was a kid, to

326
00:27:35.480 --> 00:27:38.359
to of the houses. One was fifty six, one was

327
00:27:38.480 --> 00:27:49.000
nine ninety eight, Yeah, fifty six ninety eight, But this

328
00:27:49.039 --> 00:28:00.559
one I don't remember. And you go in on the

329
00:28:00.680 --> 00:28:07.440
left hand side, there was a cudboard. On top of

330
00:28:07.559 --> 00:28:14.480
that there was was it a cupboardal was in built?

331
00:28:14.480 --> 00:28:20.240
I don't know. But that's where my nan stored shoe

332
00:28:20.279 --> 00:28:25.400
boxes with photographs in and there were some photo albums

333
00:28:25.440 --> 00:28:28.039
up there as well, because every now and then we

334
00:28:28.200 --> 00:28:30.400
get them out and have a little look, it'll laugh,

335
00:28:31.759 --> 00:28:34.680
and she'd show me she had pictures of me when

336
00:28:34.680 --> 00:28:42.200
I was little before, like when I was like really little.

337
00:28:46.960 --> 00:28:54.200
I don't know how. That's kind of a little bit confusing.

338
00:28:54.279 --> 00:28:58.000
I don't know how because this is before I was

339
00:29:01.079 --> 00:29:06.680
I was like a toddler. I'm guessing when I was

340
00:29:06.720 --> 00:29:09.400
with the foster parents, my name was still visited and

341
00:29:09.759 --> 00:29:15.599
visiting us, maybe still taking us out, and maybe my

342
00:29:15.680 --> 00:29:19.880
dad was. I don't really don't know, but there there

343
00:29:19.880 --> 00:29:24.119
were some pictures of us where I was definitely older

344
00:29:24.160 --> 00:29:31.839
than a baby. Yeah, And it was before I was too,

345
00:29:31.880 --> 00:29:37.160
because that's when I moved to Newcastle. Anyways, Pictures of

346
00:29:37.440 --> 00:29:39.720
me and a pram and stuff.

347
00:29:39.400 --> 00:29:43.359
And my nan.

348
00:29:44.680 --> 00:29:53.680
And my brother, and there's a few pictures of me

349
00:29:53.839 --> 00:30:00.440
when I was younger, when I was like a kid,

350
00:30:00.599 --> 00:30:06.359
Christmases and stuff like that, and pictures of the family.

351
00:30:06.519 --> 00:30:09.799
Pictures of my nan when she was a kid, pictures

352
00:30:09.839 --> 00:30:14.960
of her when she got married, Pictures of my granddad.

353
00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:20.720
My grandad looked like Clark Gable seriously when he was older,

354
00:30:20.720 --> 00:30:23.599
I mean when he was like in his fifties sixties,

355
00:30:24.000 --> 00:30:30.680
looked like Clark Gable, very handsome man. I obviously take

356
00:30:30.759 --> 00:30:40.200
after him, and he had a mustache. I think he

357
00:30:40.200 --> 00:30:43.880
had a mustache all his life. I don't suit a

358
00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:50.079
mustache really. In fact, recently I've been shaving. I've not

359
00:30:50.200 --> 00:30:51.319
had a beard for a while.

360
00:30:52.279 --> 00:30:52.720
I just.

361
00:30:55.759 --> 00:30:59.960
I'm not sure if having a gray beard really help

362
00:31:00.000 --> 00:31:04.559
helps me in life. I just don't know if it's

363
00:31:05.200 --> 00:31:19.400
advantageous on any level. You know, just see for me,

364
00:31:19.680 --> 00:31:21.480
I look at it. I look at pictures of me

365
00:31:21.559 --> 00:31:25.720
with beard. I think I look all right, But then

366
00:31:25.759 --> 00:31:29.039
I see other people with exactly the same kind of

367
00:31:29.079 --> 00:31:34.000
beard is what I've got, And I'm thinking, do I

368
00:31:34.039 --> 00:31:38.680
look like that? Because sometimes it looks really scraggly? And

369
00:31:40.279 --> 00:31:44.839
I don't know. I think I think beards look good

370
00:31:44.839 --> 00:31:49.519
from a distance, but as you get closer, maybe they

371
00:31:49.559 --> 00:31:58.359
don't look so good. I don't know. I might just

372
00:32:00.480 --> 00:32:04.720
I could dye my beard black and dye my hair black,

373
00:32:06.079 --> 00:32:13.359
dye my eyebrows black, and dye my ear hairs black.

374
00:32:16.519 --> 00:32:19.839
My arm hair is black. I don't know I could

375
00:32:19.839 --> 00:32:23.599
do I'd look silly, but I could do it. I

376
00:32:23.759 --> 00:32:33.440
look ridiculous, but or blonde. I used to be blonde,

377
00:32:33.759 --> 00:32:42.960
I did. I think I was born blonde, But gingery

378
00:32:43.559 --> 00:32:45.960
I say, born blonde. I don't know if I had

379
00:32:46.079 --> 00:32:50.400
much hair when I was born. That's what reverting back

380
00:32:50.480 --> 00:32:57.400
to being a baby again. Yeah, the aging process is

381
00:32:57.440 --> 00:33:07.240
a little bit like that, isn't it? Turning into a babby? See,

382
00:33:07.240 --> 00:33:08.480
that's why I used to call them when I was

383
00:33:08.480 --> 00:33:13.240
because I was lived in Newcastle called them babby's. I

384
00:33:13.279 --> 00:33:15.640
don't know, but I didn't know what baby was. I

385
00:33:15.720 --> 00:33:22.559
knew what babby was. So guys, remember that. Wow, I

386
00:33:22.599 --> 00:33:27.160
haven't heard that term for a long time, a babby unless,

387
00:33:27.160 --> 00:33:29.880
of course I'm gon getting it wrong. Maybe I was

388
00:33:29.920 --> 00:33:32.279
just pronouncing it incorrectly.

389
00:33:33.799 --> 00:33:41.039
It's baby, Jason's baby babby Babby. Why are you talking

390
00:33:41.160 --> 00:33:47.200
like that, Jason? You're twelve years old, babby Babby?

391
00:33:48.680 --> 00:33:52.839
No, I don't know. That was weird. Yeah, that was

392
00:33:52.880 --> 00:33:57.519
too weird for me. So I fall over and I

393
00:33:57.599 --> 00:34:00.759
banged my knee on the floor on the concrete. I'm crying.

394
00:34:01.000 --> 00:34:10.159
Where where I've heard MANGI mangey is so wow?

395
00:34:11.679 --> 00:34:14.400
To start with, I didn't make too much noise, but

396
00:34:14.440 --> 00:34:18.639
no one came, so I had to up it, you know,

397
00:34:18.639 --> 00:34:25.079
I had to make it louder, and you know, after

398
00:34:25.079 --> 00:34:29.360
about twenty minutes of no one taking any notice. That's

399
00:34:29.400 --> 00:34:33.599
when I used my super powerful loud voice, which I

400
00:34:33.639 --> 00:34:37.320
have hidden away. I'm not going to do an impression

401
00:34:37.320 --> 00:34:43.880
because that would be really loud. The microphone would break.

402
00:34:44.880 --> 00:34:55.880
And that's when my stepmom came running out and she tripped.

403
00:34:58.280 --> 00:35:01.519
I think she tripped on the step, but she came out.

404
00:35:01.559 --> 00:35:07.400
But the shock I know. She picked me up and

405
00:35:07.440 --> 00:35:15.239
her water broke, and it's really weird. Her water broke

406
00:35:15.599 --> 00:35:17.360
and I learned to swim at the same time. It

407
00:35:17.480 --> 00:35:20.719
was great. No, I think she picked me up and

408
00:35:20.719 --> 00:35:26.320
then she went to the kitchen and suddenly I just

409
00:35:26.360 --> 00:35:30.360
hear this splash and I'm thinking, oh, I don't have

410
00:35:30.400 --> 00:35:39.280
to clear that up. And she calls for help, and

411
00:35:39.320 --> 00:35:42.719
I'm thinking, what are you calling me for help? I'm

412
00:35:42.760 --> 00:35:46.159
the one that needs help. I'm waiting for that plaster.

413
00:35:46.320 --> 00:35:53.920
Where's the plast? Day woman? I never said that again. Wow, oh,

414
00:35:54.400 --> 00:35:57.519
but yeah, she's a woman. I've never said that to

415
00:35:57.599 --> 00:36:02.880
anyone ever in my life. I said, man, but yeah, man,

416
00:36:03.119 --> 00:36:06.000
white man, because I'm an old hippie in it. I

417
00:36:06.079 --> 00:36:08.519
used to be young hippie. Now I'm an old hippie.

418
00:36:09.159 --> 00:36:15.199
Still don't know what it means. Anyway, her waters broke,

419
00:36:16.159 --> 00:36:30.800
splashed everywhere, and I actually thought that my little brother

420
00:36:32.039 --> 00:36:34.400
was just going to pop out. And the reason he

421
00:36:34.440 --> 00:36:38.360
hadn't fallen on the floor is because she was wearing knickers.

422
00:36:39.559 --> 00:36:43.360
I didn't understand that the whole process of giving birth.

423
00:36:44.760 --> 00:36:47.079
I just figured that it just it'd come out with

424
00:36:47.119 --> 00:36:56.280
the water, you know, it'd flush out. And the next

425
00:36:56.320 --> 00:37:01.880
thing I know, she's my dad said, I'm not sure

426
00:37:01.880 --> 00:37:04.199
if my dad was. I think he was there, and

427
00:37:04.280 --> 00:37:07.679
he comes in and saying, who made this mess? You know,

428
00:37:08.519 --> 00:37:13.880
and my step one pointing to me, and so it's

429
00:37:13.960 --> 00:37:17.360
my fault. So I had to go and get them

430
00:37:17.480 --> 00:37:20.719
the mopping bucket. None of that happened. Someone cleared it up.

431
00:37:20.840 --> 00:37:21.360
They must have.

432
00:37:21.320 --> 00:37:25.079
Done, and.

433
00:37:27.119 --> 00:37:30.039
The two things they had to do. First of all,

434
00:37:31.000 --> 00:37:35.920
they had to leave us on their own, but they

435
00:37:36.000 --> 00:37:40.480
left us with I think I left us. They left

436
00:37:40.480 --> 00:37:44.280
the neighbor looking after us, and they been next door

437
00:37:44.320 --> 00:37:47.760
that we were very close with, so I stay close.

438
00:37:47.840 --> 00:37:49.880
But we liked them.

439
00:37:50.119 --> 00:37:52.880
They were really, really nice people, so I think we

440
00:37:53.079 --> 00:37:58.079
probably stayed or maybe her mum came around and looked

441
00:37:58.079 --> 00:38:02.719
after us. Who was my step name? Someone did anyway,

442
00:38:03.360 --> 00:38:09.719
and they went off to hospital to have the baby,

443
00:38:11.719 --> 00:38:15.800
and then a few hours later after they left, my

444
00:38:15.880 --> 00:38:20.320
nan and grandad turned up to look after us, and

445
00:38:20.360 --> 00:38:22.840
they were with us for about three days, three or

446
00:38:22.840 --> 00:38:28.920
four days while the baby was in hospital, because the

447
00:38:28.960 --> 00:38:33.199
baby was born, you know, within a few hours. I

448
00:38:33.239 --> 00:38:37.079
think I'm partially making this up because I don't know

449
00:38:37.119 --> 00:38:40.840
the full facts, but I think my little brother was born,

450
00:38:41.000 --> 00:38:52.760
you know, fairly quick, and I think she was quite lucky.

451
00:38:52.840 --> 00:38:57.000
She's got she had an extra large uterus, so I

452
00:38:57.079 --> 00:39:00.480
don't know what that was saying. It just lead out,

453
00:39:01.119 --> 00:39:04.760
no problems, no pain, it was just you know, didn't

454
00:39:04.760 --> 00:39:07.119
even realize you had baby, just like it was just

455
00:39:07.960 --> 00:39:10.239
she was sitting there eating some corn flakes and my

456
00:39:10.320 --> 00:39:15.199
dad popped out. It came back and my little brother

457
00:39:15.360 --> 00:39:19.840
was just lying on the on the bed sucking. It's fun.

458
00:39:20.280 --> 00:39:25.719
She didn't realize she'd give them birth. Would you believe

459
00:39:25.719 --> 00:39:38.119
any of this? So that was my I remember visiting.

460
00:39:39.159 --> 00:39:45.599
We couldn't visit until I think the day after, so

461
00:39:46.039 --> 00:39:53.000
probably went up there on my birthday, probably to visit

462
00:39:53.400 --> 00:39:58.199
the hospital. Things were a little bit different in the seventies.

463
00:39:58.239 --> 00:39:58.639
It was.

464
00:40:00.239 --> 00:40:03.719
You know, people stayed in hospital a lot longer for

465
00:40:03.880 --> 00:40:09.679
things that you wouldn't be in hospital for nowadays, if

466
00:40:09.719 --> 00:40:12.480
I had a lot of outpatient things are done that

467
00:40:12.599 --> 00:40:18.559
used to be in patient things. You know, So things

468
00:40:18.679 --> 00:40:23.239
like having a baby, you can be in and out

469
00:40:23.239 --> 00:40:27.320
of in a short period of time, providing everything's gone

470
00:40:27.559 --> 00:40:31.119
to plan, you know. But back then she was in

471
00:40:31.159 --> 00:40:35.639
hospital for about a week. I mean, I know people

472
00:40:35.639 --> 00:40:37.400
have had their appendix out and they're out of in

473
00:40:37.440 --> 00:40:42.079
about two days. I was in for at least what

474
00:40:42.480 --> 00:40:46.119
six seven days? When I have my appendix out, I

475
00:40:46.159 --> 00:40:50.199
did milk it. I loved I'd have my favorite time

476
00:40:50.280 --> 00:40:53.719
of all. That was my favorite time my childhood was

477
00:40:53.760 --> 00:40:57.960
being in hospital. That's sad, isn't it? But I loved it.

478
00:40:58.039 --> 00:41:05.079
I did had the best time. And also I was

479
00:41:05.119 --> 00:41:09.199
in love with Nurse Nichols. So that was when I

480
00:41:09.239 --> 00:41:19.760
was about twelve though. Anyway, the most important thing, remember, yeah,

481
00:41:20.519 --> 00:41:25.000
I think we spoke to my stepmom on the phone

482
00:41:25.360 --> 00:41:30.400
and she said to me, this is like first thing

483
00:41:30.440 --> 00:41:32.440
in the I think it was first thing on the

484
00:41:32.480 --> 00:41:37.719
morning on my birthday and she says, happy birthday, Jason.

485
00:41:38.280 --> 00:41:42.960
I said thanks. She said, your little brothers. Isn't your

486
00:41:43.000 --> 00:41:45.679
little brother the best birthday present you could ever get?

487
00:41:50.000 --> 00:41:54.840
I didn't know what to do with that. I was like, okay,

488
00:41:54.960 --> 00:41:58.320
I want to say yes, just to make her feel

489
00:41:58.360 --> 00:42:03.079
better and to her feel that she's done something worthwhile.

490
00:42:09.719 --> 00:42:15.199
It's one that's funny, done something that actually mad. She

491
00:42:15.880 --> 00:42:18.199
meant something to me, which it didn't.

492
00:42:19.559 --> 00:42:24.039
I didn't care. It was a novelty, to be honest.

493
00:42:24.199 --> 00:42:26.719
He was a novelty when he first came along. It

494
00:42:26.840 --> 00:42:28.800
was like having a pet, Really, isn't it If you

495
00:42:28.800 --> 00:42:31.159
have a new brother, like having a new kitten or

496
00:42:31.199 --> 00:42:34.920
a new dog. The novelty's there, the novelty wears off.

497
00:42:35.719 --> 00:42:39.039
It's like, yeah, I'll take him for a walk every day, promise,

498
00:42:39.960 --> 00:42:43.360
And then after three weeks, oh, you all turn to

499
00:42:43.400 --> 00:42:48.760
take him out? Can't you take him out? So yeah,

500
00:42:48.800 --> 00:42:50.559
that's kind of what it was like having a brother.

501
00:42:51.920 --> 00:42:57.079
Plus I've already had. I've got two brothers already. I

502
00:42:57.159 --> 00:43:00.800
knew what to expect, and I didn't see much point

503
00:43:00.840 --> 00:43:03.880
in them, So to have another one didn't seem a

504
00:43:03.920 --> 00:43:07.079
lot of There was no logic in that. Really, my

505
00:43:07.199 --> 00:43:10.400
two pointless older ones, what's the point in another new one,

506
00:43:10.639 --> 00:43:14.960
a younger one. This is how I used to feel

507
00:43:15.000 --> 00:43:23.440
when I was eight, and so I'm on the phone

508
00:43:27.239 --> 00:43:29.639
and she's saying, yes, it is the best president you've

509
00:43:29.679 --> 00:43:31.760
ever had. Isn't it the best birthday present you could

510
00:43:31.760 --> 00:43:36.840
ever get? And I laughed, thinking she's joking, and she said,

511
00:43:36.840 --> 00:43:40.039
why are you laughing? I said, oh, no, nothing, no reason.

512
00:43:41.679 --> 00:43:44.119
I just thought of a joke that I saw in

513
00:43:44.119 --> 00:43:49.199
the Kenny Everette Show. She said, what was it? I said,

514
00:43:51.079 --> 00:44:00.480
it's basically he was. I don't remember. She said, did

515
00:44:00.519 --> 00:44:04.239
you make it up? I said, no, no, it's it

516
00:44:05.280 --> 00:44:08.000
did happen, and forget what it was now. But you

517
00:44:08.039 --> 00:44:10.000
remembered that when you were talking to me a second

518
00:44:10.000 --> 00:44:14.079
ago and started laughing. In fact, you remembering it while

519
00:44:14.119 --> 00:44:17.840
I was talking to you about the baby, about baby.

520
00:44:17.840 --> 00:44:20.360
It wasn't the baby baby? Do you ever see that?

521
00:44:20.840 --> 00:44:24.000
Do you hear people talk like nurses and stuff? Let's

522
00:44:24.039 --> 00:44:28.360
see how baby is today? How's baby?

523
00:44:28.639 --> 00:44:28.960
Like? What?

524
00:44:30.800 --> 00:44:31.679
Learn my name?

525
00:44:33.280 --> 00:44:39.280
My name's Jason, not baby? How's baby? Let's wait baby?

526
00:44:40.679 --> 00:44:40.800
Oh?

527
00:44:40.920 --> 00:44:44.360
But you're looking forward to baby being born, aren't you? Oh?

528
00:44:44.800 --> 00:44:53.199
Baby baby? I don't know. Do people what do they

529
00:44:53.280 --> 00:44:59.119
call not wet nurses? What is the nurses that help

530
00:45:00.079 --> 00:45:04.800
pull babies out of you know, help with that part

531
00:45:04.840 --> 00:45:12.760
of it? The birth part I don't know what they're

532
00:45:12.760 --> 00:45:20.360
called baby nurses for them people, So are they told

533
00:45:20.400 --> 00:45:23.639
to use a word word baby as often as possible,

534
00:45:26.320 --> 00:45:30.719
don't forget to feed baby? Like, yeah, I feel like

535
00:45:30.800 --> 00:45:35.079
to remember that one. It's like when you're doing a meditation,

536
00:45:35.199 --> 00:45:38.880
they said, don't forget to breathe, you know, I remember

537
00:45:38.920 --> 00:45:42.559
saying at the times, you know what, I actually interrupted

538
00:45:42.599 --> 00:45:50.599
the meditation and said, I've not been rude. And I'm

539
00:45:50.679 --> 00:45:55.400
thirty one years old, thirty two years old, as you

540
00:45:55.440 --> 00:45:57.719
are thirty two years old, not really relevant the age,

541
00:45:57.760 --> 00:46:01.760
but thirty two years old. Never once have I ever

542
00:46:01.800 --> 00:46:09.159
forgotten to breathe. And the meditation teacher thought I was

543
00:46:09.239 --> 00:46:14.159
being rude, rude, and I said, not being rude. It's

544
00:46:14.199 --> 00:46:17.199
just like I don't need to be told to remember

545
00:46:17.239 --> 00:46:21.960
to breeve. I've always breathed. I've never had to be

546
00:46:22.039 --> 00:46:31.280
reminded to breathe. Hmm, yeah, I didn't go down well.

547
00:46:32.719 --> 00:46:36.800
But anyway, baby, I said.

548
00:46:36.800 --> 00:46:39.199
When are we going to get to see baby? When

549
00:46:39.239 --> 00:46:42.880
can I meet baby? When are you bring baby home?

550
00:46:45.119 --> 00:46:51.280
Baby? Anyway? Yeah, so so she's saying, don't you think

551
00:46:51.320 --> 00:46:55.199
that's the best birthday present you could ever have? And

552
00:46:55.280 --> 00:46:59.360
I said, yeah, yeah. But seriously, though, she said, what,

553
00:47:00.599 --> 00:47:04.320
I'm actually getting a proper present, aren't they? And she laughed,

554
00:47:04.559 --> 00:47:11.480
And then I thought, well, you're laughing, but it doesn't

555
00:47:11.519 --> 00:47:13.320
mean it's a yes or a no. I don't know

556
00:47:13.320 --> 00:47:16.440
what does that mean you laughed at the question. But

557
00:47:16.480 --> 00:47:21.079
does that mean that it's funny what I said, but

558
00:47:21.159 --> 00:47:24.199
I'm not getting a present, or that I am getting

559
00:47:24.199 --> 00:47:29.480
a present, Because in answer to your question, step money,

560
00:47:30.199 --> 00:47:33.440
you pooon out A new baby, a new brother is

561
00:47:33.559 --> 00:47:39.960
not my idea of a good birthday present. It's not

562
00:47:40.360 --> 00:47:44.840
just not never will be, never has been. If anything,

563
00:47:45.000 --> 00:47:49.719
it's an inconvenience. If anything, I think, if we're all honest,

564
00:47:50.840 --> 00:47:56.400
it's spoilt my birthday. It's took the shine of my birthday.

565
00:47:57.800 --> 00:48:03.360
It's definitely taken the attention away from my birthday. And

566
00:48:03.400 --> 00:48:06.039
we all know how important the eighth birthday is for

567
00:48:06.079 --> 00:48:14.480
a boy eight years old. Oh, is anyone talking about

568
00:48:14.480 --> 00:48:18.880
how Jason's doing? Or it's Jason's birthday tomorrow, or it's

569
00:48:18.960 --> 00:48:25.920
Jason's birthday today? Or or no, what are they talking about? Baby?

570
00:48:26.519 --> 00:48:28.079
We're talking about baby?

571
00:48:28.480 --> 00:48:29.239
Oh?

572
00:48:29.760 --> 00:48:32.480
Baby, how's baby doing? Because of course he didn't have

573
00:48:32.480 --> 00:48:39.320
a name yet baby the new baby, Like, what about me?

574
00:48:40.880 --> 00:48:44.039
I used to be the baby yesterday I was the baby.

575
00:48:44.400 --> 00:48:44.960
Now I'm not.

576
00:48:46.960 --> 00:48:49.599
Yeah, I've only had a year of being a baby.

577
00:48:50.480 --> 00:48:54.840
Most people get like a few years, or you know,

578
00:48:55.039 --> 00:48:57.239
get quite a long time of being a baby, of

579
00:48:57.360 --> 00:49:00.519
being the babyish and growing up and being a loan

580
00:49:00.719 --> 00:49:06.679
I didn't get that, so come on. The reason I

581
00:49:06.679 --> 00:49:08.159
didn't get it is because I was five when I

582
00:49:08.199 --> 00:49:12.920
was born. But luckily my real mum also had a

583
00:49:12.960 --> 00:49:19.519
massive We didn't bother her. The birth didn't bother her

584
00:49:20.400 --> 00:49:23.920
filopian tube it is that the right word, filopian tube

585
00:49:24.000 --> 00:49:30.840
or uterusfra. Yeah, she had a large urefra. So I

586
00:49:30.960 --> 00:49:33.480
was when I was born. It didn't really affect her.

587
00:49:34.119 --> 00:49:36.400
Plus I was tiny when I was born. I was

588
00:49:36.519 --> 00:49:42.039
really very small, underdeveloped. Still am a bit really still

589
00:49:42.079 --> 00:49:50.760
waiting for parts to grow. So my nan and granddad

590
00:49:50.920 --> 00:49:55.440
are looking after us. I would talk about, you know,

591
00:49:55.639 --> 00:49:58.199
seeing my little brother for the first time, but it

592
00:49:58.239 --> 00:50:05.039
was completely unmemorable, so I won't bother It's like, how

593
00:50:05.079 --> 00:50:11.280
do people get all emotional about babies as it's so

594
00:50:12.320 --> 00:50:14.039
if it's your own baby, I understand it, but like

595
00:50:14.920 --> 00:50:19.599
as a as just another brother added on to the

596
00:50:19.639 --> 00:50:22.480
ones I've already got, which I didn't want anyway. I

597
00:50:22.480 --> 00:50:24.360
didn't want the ones. I didn't want the ones I had,

598
00:50:24.400 --> 00:50:27.199
so I definitely didn't want another one. Yeah, we get

599
00:50:27.239 --> 00:50:33.519
the idea. JJ, okay, inconvenience if anything, well, you know,

600
00:50:33.519 --> 00:50:40.760
it wasn't wasn't a special moment, and it was like,

601
00:50:41.480 --> 00:50:46.639
okay always my birthday cake didn't get to ice it

602
00:50:46.880 --> 00:50:55.079
because you were too busy giving birth to that thing. Yeah,

603
00:50:55.239 --> 00:50:58.000
I had a birthday cake that was just a sponge

604
00:50:58.519 --> 00:51:09.800
with some candles now icing. How is that acceptable? How

605
00:51:09.920 --> 00:51:16.559
is that in any way? It shouldn't be allowed. I

606
00:51:16.559 --> 00:51:19.840
mean that's neglect, isn't it. I mean, oh, you're having

607
00:51:19.840 --> 00:51:22.960
another baby? What about the ones you've got? What about us?

608
00:51:23.119 --> 00:51:25.800
I know we're not your real kids, but what anyway?

609
00:51:26.159 --> 00:51:30.239
What about my birthday cake? Forget that that silly little

610
00:51:30.280 --> 00:51:34.360
thing you just had? What about my birthday cake? Had

611
00:51:34.360 --> 00:51:36.840
a bit of an attitude on eight, didn't. I don't

612
00:51:36.840 --> 00:51:41.800
come across its very nice? Did I back then? Oh?

613
00:51:41.880 --> 00:51:44.239
Much nicer. It was much nicer by the time I

614
00:51:44.320 --> 00:51:49.840
got to ten. To be fair, the next year was

615
00:51:49.840 --> 00:51:53.079
all right because I just saw how much stray not

616
00:51:53.119 --> 00:51:56.679
getting any sleep, the effects it had on the parents.

617
00:51:57.440 --> 00:52:00.320
I was like, yeah, I get your back for me

618
00:52:00.360 --> 00:52:05.360
not having a proper birthday. Hmm. I think they must

619
00:52:05.360 --> 00:52:08.800
have aged about ten years in the first year of

620
00:52:08.920 --> 00:52:15.639
having a baby. It was great. So I none of

621
00:52:15.679 --> 00:52:23.480
this is true. I know, we went visited the baby,

622
00:52:23.920 --> 00:52:33.440
went and visited the baby. And I mean even back then,

623
00:52:33.719 --> 00:52:39.159
I thought, you know what the nurses in the hospital

624
00:52:39.519 --> 00:52:43.360
that back then they used to have nurses do the

625
00:52:43.480 --> 00:52:50.519
nurse's job, and now they've got care workers, care assistance,

626
00:52:50.599 --> 00:52:54.119
care workers doing the nurse's job. The nurses seemed to

627
00:52:54.119 --> 00:52:59.079
be doing the doctor's job, and the doctors, uh, just

628
00:53:00.039 --> 00:53:04.480
come and go and doing whatever. Probably doing the surgeon stop.

629
00:53:04.519 --> 00:53:10.159
I don't know, but I couldn't. Honestly, it's amazing. If

630
00:53:10.159 --> 00:53:12.440
you go to the hospital now, it's changed so much.

631
00:53:14.440 --> 00:53:17.119
No one seems to be getting paid for what they're doing,

632
00:53:17.679 --> 00:53:20.199
Like the level of what they're doing. The nurses are

633
00:53:20.199 --> 00:53:23.000
doing so much more than they used to do. The

634
00:53:23.119 --> 00:53:25.559
care workers are doing so much more than they used

635
00:53:25.559 --> 00:53:31.280
to It's I mean, I'm pretty sure I saw one

636
00:53:31.280 --> 00:53:35.960
of the cleaners doing a heart transplant on one of

637
00:53:36.000 --> 00:53:57.480
the patients. Oh, admittedly she did get arrested. Who's only

638
00:53:57.519 --> 00:54:04.920
in with a broken leg. So that was silly, I

639
00:54:05.039 --> 00:54:13.360
figured out because the baby was taken into this room

640
00:54:13.400 --> 00:54:17.960
of other babies and stuff, and the nurse said, oh,

641
00:54:18.159 --> 00:54:21.880
go and get your baby, can get baby. I can't

642
00:54:21.960 --> 00:54:27.519
get baby, and came in with a cot and this

643
00:54:27.559 --> 00:54:36.880
little scrunched up thing, little gargoyle. The I mean, the

644
00:54:36.960 --> 00:54:39.400
thing is, you know, sometimes you think, oh no, but

645
00:54:39.440 --> 00:54:41.960
if you actually looked at baby and said to someone,

646
00:54:42.639 --> 00:54:46.199
do you know what that's spent the last nine months underwater?

647
00:54:47.400 --> 00:54:50.679
You believe munya because it looks like it's spent the

648
00:54:50.760 --> 00:54:55.159
last nine months underwater without any air, without any light.

649
00:54:56.440 --> 00:55:01.199
I mean, they're basically like little sea creatures you'd expect

650
00:55:01.239 --> 00:55:04.920
to find at the bottom of a big ship. It's

651
00:55:07.400 --> 00:55:09.400
you know what I mean, if you if you woke

652
00:55:09.519 --> 00:55:13.159
up and okay, okay, I won't go any further. Just yeah,

653
00:55:13.239 --> 00:55:16.280
babies horrible looking things.

654
00:55:17.880 --> 00:55:20.880
There was there was years ago there was these baby

655
00:55:20.960 --> 00:55:24.760
doll things and they look like babies and they were

656
00:55:24.800 --> 00:55:30.079
the most ugliest things ever and the reason and they

657
00:55:30.199 --> 00:55:33.840
actually looked and I realized, like they look like babies,

658
00:55:33.920 --> 00:55:37.039
like real babies, you know, when they're first born, all

659
00:55:37.119 --> 00:55:44.239
crinkles and this. It's like they haven't become because it's

660
00:55:44.280 --> 00:55:47.400
not really until they become toddlers, and then they become

661
00:55:47.480 --> 00:55:52.239
like miniature humans, don't they. They look like humans almost,

662
00:55:53.679 --> 00:55:57.239
but with huge heads and little bodies.

663
00:55:58.039 --> 00:56:02.039
So alien humans. But but you know, gradually they grow

664
00:56:02.079 --> 00:56:04.320
into their head, don't they by the time they get

665
00:56:04.360 --> 00:56:10.920
to about seven or eight, maybe nine. I mean, that

666
00:56:11.079 --> 00:56:15.960
head's so big and the eyes like et it's ridiculous.

667
00:56:17.000 --> 00:56:20.159
The eyes are bigger than their head. I mean, how

668
00:56:20.239 --> 00:56:22.599
is that even possible? How can an eye be bigger

669
00:56:22.639 --> 00:56:29.039
than the head it's in. I mean, the eyes are

670
00:56:29.079 --> 00:56:34.480
definitely bigger than his mouth. His eyes wouldn't even fit

671
00:56:34.519 --> 00:56:36.960
in his mouth. I'm not I didn't try what I'm saying.

672
00:56:37.400 --> 00:56:42.360
It's just such a weird kind of organism and it

673
00:56:42.480 --> 00:56:46.079
was a mess. But I started thinking, well, how do

674
00:56:46.199 --> 00:56:50.239
you know that this is the baby bear? In the mind?

675
00:56:50.280 --> 00:56:54.119
You called and ward them baby? No one's got a

676
00:56:54.199 --> 00:56:58.000
name yet, so because this is back in the days

677
00:56:58.039 --> 00:57:01.599
when people didn't they'd wait days before giving a name

678
00:57:01.639 --> 00:57:08.159
to a kid. I've got a name straight away, but

679
00:57:08.280 --> 00:57:11.119
I recommended it and they didn't go for it. My

680
00:57:11.360 --> 00:57:15.360
mom was bastard, but no, or another one was you

681
00:57:15.480 --> 00:57:18.920
ruined our birthday. But they didn't want that either. They

682
00:57:18.920 --> 00:57:21.280
said that's a sentence. I said, no, if you put

683
00:57:21.280 --> 00:57:24.760
it all together, I said, no, you can't have a

684
00:57:24.840 --> 00:57:26.960
word that's really long like that. I said, if you've

685
00:57:26.960 --> 00:57:30.480
never been to India, they have names that are like

686
00:57:31.280 --> 00:57:35.920
longer than the alphabet some of their names. Or Thailand.

687
00:57:36.239 --> 00:57:39.239
It was like, honestly, some of the names are so long.

688
00:57:40.360 --> 00:57:42.800
And she said that's border on racism. I said, no,

689
00:57:42.880 --> 00:57:46.320
it's not bordering on race. It's actually true. Look it up.

690
00:57:47.760 --> 00:57:48.400
Look it up.

691
00:57:49.880 --> 00:57:51.599
I know that you've lost a lot of blood and

692
00:57:51.599 --> 00:57:54.960
a lot of liquid given birth and that, but I

693
00:57:54.960 --> 00:57:57.280
mean when you pulled him out, did you pull out

694
00:57:57.280 --> 00:58:01.400
your own brain as well? Apparently that's the line you

695
00:58:01.440 --> 00:58:04.320
shouldn't cross with your parents and say stuff like that.

696
00:58:12.239 --> 00:58:16.679
Oh dear, that's so ridiculous what I'm saying today, I

697
00:58:16.719 --> 00:58:19.639
don't mean any of it. I'm just in a weird mood.

698
00:58:23.119 --> 00:58:27.000
But yeah, god, he was ugly anyway, horrible, And I

699
00:58:27.119 --> 00:58:32.440
just thought, do they just randomly just dis grabbed the

700
00:58:32.480 --> 00:58:35.079
first baby that they see and bring it in because

701
00:58:35.079 --> 00:58:38.039
they all look the same. How do they tell the difference.

702
00:58:40.480 --> 00:58:44.719
Oh he's so pretty. Oh it's so beautiful, my little baby.

703
00:58:44.880 --> 00:58:47.559
No he's not, no offense, but no.

704
00:58:50.320 --> 00:58:54.039
They look they're just crinkled. I don't know how to

705
00:58:54.079 --> 00:59:00.400
explain that. Don't look much different to like newborn mice.

706
00:59:01.480 --> 00:59:05.159
There's that look of like a little crinkled and or

707
00:59:05.199 --> 00:59:08.599
a little puppy or a little cat like really you know,

708
00:59:08.719 --> 00:59:11.840
newborn where they've got no hair and they just basically

709
00:59:11.880 --> 00:59:16.480
just pink. The difference is with a puppy they grow

710
00:59:16.639 --> 00:59:20.440
very quick, and a cat does as well. Humans I

711
00:59:21.039 --> 00:59:28.679
still look like that, still pink and bored. It's no fear.

712
00:59:30.760 --> 00:59:34.000
So yeah, babies are good. It's brilliant and so happy.

713
00:59:34.000 --> 00:59:38.719
When he was born, it changed my life. It did

714
00:59:38.800 --> 00:59:45.800
change my life actually because he stayed in the house.

715
00:59:46.400 --> 00:59:48.960
Obviously we had to have him in the house. I mean,

716
00:59:49.039 --> 00:59:52.280
unfortunately they brought him home. I thought it was just

717
00:59:52.320 --> 00:59:54.280
going to be they like send him off for adoption

718
00:59:54.440 --> 00:59:57.599
like they did me. But no, they brought him back

719
00:59:58.519 --> 01:00:05.280
and he stayed in my dad's room, their parents' room

720
01:00:05.400 --> 01:00:11.679
for probably about six months, so I still had my bedroom.

721
01:00:11.760 --> 01:00:14.800
We're just right next to their bedroom. Now I was tired.

722
01:00:15.880 --> 01:00:18.159
I think it used to keep the baby like wake

723
01:00:18.239 --> 01:00:21.880
me up and stuff. So it wasn't ideal because it

724
01:00:21.960 --> 01:00:23.760
was a small house. There's no way to get away

725
01:00:23.760 --> 01:00:31.960
from the screaming, and my brothers complained about it. My

726
01:00:32.079 --> 01:00:36.079
dad wasn't happy with it. Eventually sat me down and

727
01:00:36.119 --> 01:00:40.119
asked me to stop screaming, so I stopped. It's a

728
01:00:40.239 --> 01:00:46.800
joking there somewhere, And eventually we had to move out

729
01:00:46.800 --> 01:00:54.800
of there because he needed his own room. So he

730
01:00:54.880 --> 01:01:00.760
moved out into a big house and we all had

731
01:01:00.800 --> 01:01:03.119
our own rooms, and that's where it all kind of

732
01:01:03.960 --> 01:01:07.679
went wrong from there, really, but that was the nicest

733
01:01:07.679 --> 01:01:09.639
house I ever lived in, that little house where my

734
01:01:09.719 --> 01:01:16.760
nanogrand had then moved in as well. The weird thing

735
01:01:16.800 --> 01:01:20.800
about my brother though, sort of once he sort of

736
01:01:20.840 --> 01:01:26.880
developed kind of a likeness to human, to a human,

737
01:01:27.400 --> 01:01:32.000
you know, he kind of had facial expressions and he looked, Yeah,

738
01:01:32.039 --> 01:01:35.159
he looked human. It was a toddler at this point.

739
01:01:37.119 --> 01:01:41.000
He's kept exactly the same face the whole life, his

740
01:01:41.079 --> 01:01:44.199
whole life. And you might think, well, yeah, everyone does

741
01:01:45.480 --> 01:01:49.480
unless you have surgery. Like, no, I look nothing like

742
01:01:49.599 --> 01:01:52.599
how I looked when I was a kid, not even

743
01:01:52.599 --> 01:01:56.480
when I was fifteen. Not even when I was eight twelve,

744
01:01:57.480 --> 01:01:59.840
not even when I was twenty. I don't look the same.

745
01:02:00.599 --> 01:02:07.039
He looks exactly the same. He looks older, of course,

746
01:02:07.239 --> 01:02:10.559
I'm going it'd be weird. And when he was two

747
01:02:10.679 --> 01:02:16.360
he looked forty seven, that would be strange. But he's

748
01:02:16.400 --> 01:02:20.880
still got the same features, still looks the same, same

749
01:02:20.960 --> 01:02:26.239
facial expression, my remover. I mean, he's got more than

750
01:02:26.280 --> 01:02:29.480
one facial expression. I'm sure I've seen at least two.

751
01:02:30.519 --> 01:02:37.599
So it's he's ruined my birthday, man, I mean eighth birthdays,

752
01:02:37.960 --> 01:02:41.440
it's supposed to be a special occasion. But what I

753
01:02:41.599 --> 01:02:43.360
did do I'll give you the next part of the

754
01:02:43.400 --> 01:02:47.039
story tomorrow. Actually i'll tell you about presents and stuff.

755
01:02:48.400 --> 01:02:55.639
But on my actual birthday, I did get some golf clubs,

756
01:02:55.679 --> 01:02:59.400
like a putt in set, but there weren't no crappy thing.

757
01:02:59.519 --> 01:03:07.000
These are like heavy steal golf clubs, and they were good.

758
01:03:07.199 --> 01:03:09.679
They were heavy. They were good, really, probably about heavy

759
01:03:09.719 --> 01:03:18.400
as I was actually, And I don't remember what else

760
01:03:18.480 --> 01:03:23.639
I got, but I think we were in the garden

761
01:03:23.719 --> 01:03:27.880
and I was trying to I was trying to endure

762
01:03:27.920 --> 01:03:34.480
my birthday. But things felt like they'd changed, you know,

763
01:03:35.960 --> 01:03:38.880
It's almost like I was turning. I was turning into

764
01:03:38.920 --> 01:03:45.840
an adult. And I suppose I knew that things were

765
01:03:45.840 --> 01:03:50.039
never going to be the same again, because when they

766
01:03:50.079 --> 01:03:52.400
came back, they were going to have this little alien

767
01:03:52.440 --> 01:03:57.559
with them. They're going to give it all this attention, which,

768
01:03:57.599 --> 01:04:00.960
as I said, is fun for the first couple of days,

769
01:04:02.119 --> 01:04:06.000
maybe three or four days even. I don't know how

770
01:04:06.039 --> 01:04:10.039
people may make that kind of how to keep the

771
01:04:10.079 --> 01:04:13.639
interest up, I don't know. I guess it's just lucky.

772
01:04:13.679 --> 01:04:17.119
I never became a parent, I suppose, but they managed

773
01:04:17.159 --> 01:04:26.639
to keep interest. And it's gotta be boring, is't it.

774
01:04:28.280 --> 01:04:34.440
So it's like what it does is just cry, go

775
01:04:34.559 --> 01:04:39.239
to the toilet and cry, and sleep and go to

776
01:04:39.280 --> 01:04:45.079
the toilet and sleep whilst going to the toilet. You know,

777
01:04:45.159 --> 01:04:48.599
It's just it's this. There's not a lot of points

778
01:04:48.599 --> 01:04:51.920
to them, is there. I mean, if that was a gift,

779
01:04:51.920 --> 01:04:54.360
if someone gave you a gift and that's all it did,

780
01:04:55.239 --> 01:05:00.239
pooed and cried and slept, you'd give it back. Say no, okay,

781
01:05:00.239 --> 01:05:07.960
it's can I change this? Please? Could I? Yeah? Can

782
01:05:07.960 --> 01:05:12.079
I have a television? Yeah? Can I?

783
01:05:12.239 --> 01:05:12.440
Yeah?

784
01:05:12.559 --> 01:05:18.039
Thanks? I'd like something different. This isn't. No, it's not

785
01:05:18.119 --> 01:05:22.559
all I ever hoped it would be. All it does

786
01:05:22.639 --> 01:05:28.519
is just cry and pooh and sleep. How's that supposed

787
01:05:28.519 --> 01:05:35.079
to be fun? No? No, I want to give it back,

788
01:05:36.920 --> 01:05:38.719
have you okay, well, have you got a different one?

789
01:05:39.960 --> 01:05:43.480
Can I Can I exchange it for a different baby

790
01:05:43.760 --> 01:05:48.760
when it doesn't make so much noise? And if you've

791
01:05:48.760 --> 01:05:50.280
got any of that pooh a little bit. They don't

792
01:05:50.280 --> 01:06:03.599
pooh much, you know, just a small amount. Okay, we'll

793
01:06:03.639 --> 01:06:04.159
take it back.

794
01:06:04.199 --> 01:06:04.360
Then.

795
01:06:07.599 --> 01:06:09.159
I don't know how long it was before they gave

796
01:06:09.199 --> 01:06:12.840
him a name. I didn't like any of my suggestions,

797
01:06:12.880 --> 01:06:22.960
as I already said, birthday ruiner. So yeah, ruined my birthday,

798
01:06:23.119 --> 01:06:31.519
my eighth birthday. And then see it was never never

799
01:06:31.599 --> 01:06:34.119
really like growing up from then on to the age

800
01:06:34.119 --> 01:06:39.039
of fifteen, we did celebrate birthdays. And that's the one really,

801
01:06:39.239 --> 01:06:41.880
you know thing I can never take away from my

802
01:06:41.960 --> 01:06:47.760
dad and his wife at the time. They really went

803
01:06:47.800 --> 01:06:51.239
all out for birthdays, Christmases things like that really did.

804
01:06:51.559 --> 01:06:54.639
Couldn't ask some more, And what I could ask some

805
01:06:54.719 --> 01:06:58.480
more is to not have a baby brother. But I'm

806
01:06:58.480 --> 01:07:00.480
going to send him a happy birthday tech stuff. Just

807
01:07:00.760 --> 01:07:04.719
after doing this I've just spend the hour slagging him off.

808
01:07:05.199 --> 01:07:07.639
But yeah, I will. I will say happy birthday, brother,

809
01:07:08.880 --> 01:07:16.159
Please don't listen to my podcast, please please don't. And

810
01:07:16.400 --> 01:07:20.800
sunny jokes, sony silliness, just a bit of h in

811
01:07:20.920 --> 01:07:27.159
it and ah, just messing about that's all, nothing serious,

812
01:07:28.159 --> 01:07:34.280
just having a laugh. So yeah, but it did really

813
01:07:34.400 --> 01:07:37.000
did with my birthday, but in reality it did. But

814
01:07:38.960 --> 01:07:40.760
it also kind of it was nice to have my

815
01:07:40.800 --> 01:07:49.119
birthday not directly after the day of my brother's birthday.

816
01:07:49.639 --> 01:07:51.199
You know, it's nice to have a few a little

817
01:07:51.199 --> 01:07:56.320
bit of time in between birthdays. So it's almost like

818
01:07:56.360 --> 01:08:00.159
it'd be a big celebration for him and then to

819
01:08:00.199 --> 01:08:04.920
be a celebration for me on my birthday. But it

820
01:08:05.000 --> 01:08:09.199
was kind of eclipsed by him because he was clearly

821
01:08:09.199 --> 01:08:14.760
the most important child in the world. I was like, Okay,

822
01:08:15.519 --> 01:08:18.880
if he really is that important, then.

823
01:08:20.760 --> 01:08:21.720
Shouldn't he be.

824
01:08:22.000 --> 01:08:24.640
I mean, honestly, it's like he was a second coming

825
01:08:24.800 --> 01:08:28.800
or something. I just thought, God, this is ridiculous. It

826
01:08:28.920 --> 01:08:30.880
makes such a big thing. He can't even read yet.

827
01:08:31.920 --> 01:08:33.520
I mean, we don't know if he's going to start

828
01:08:33.520 --> 01:08:36.680
preaching and stuff like that when he gets older, healing

829
01:08:36.720 --> 01:08:39.399
people we don't know he can't read yet. Well, he's

830
01:08:39.399 --> 01:08:42.439
still he's still dribbling, and you know it's hard. He

831
01:08:42.439 --> 01:08:45.600
won't even eat his food about spitting it out everywhere,

832
01:08:45.920 --> 01:08:49.159
which I do agree was quite funny that he did that.

833
01:08:52.800 --> 01:08:59.720
But yeah, he spoil my birthday. And I sometimes felt

834
01:08:59.760 --> 01:09:05.439
that because we had this ceremony thing where we'd go

835
01:09:05.520 --> 01:09:09.119
into no sacrifices or anything, just like that kind of ceremony.

836
01:09:10.079 --> 01:09:12.520
We'll go into the people's birth into their bedrooms and

837
01:09:12.960 --> 01:09:16.840
sort of seeing happy birthday, all that stuff, and give

838
01:09:16.920 --> 01:09:20.560
them presents. And it was lovely. It was really lovely.

839
01:09:20.640 --> 01:09:23.720
And I'm just joking about but it was nice. But

840
01:09:23.760 --> 01:09:27.640
I got the sense that everyone was birth dayed out

841
01:09:27.960 --> 01:09:32.159
by the end of the twenty fifth and then my

842
01:09:32.239 --> 01:09:36.279
birthday was in twenty six and it didn't seem as

843
01:09:36.279 --> 01:09:41.840
if the energy was there. I can imagine it's like

844
01:09:42.159 --> 01:09:45.920
going to see someone performing in the theater, but they're

845
01:09:45.960 --> 01:09:50.119
doing two shows, one at five o'clock and then one

846
01:09:50.159 --> 01:09:58.439
at eight o'clock, and maybe feels like you've gone to

847
01:09:58.520 --> 01:10:01.439
the last show, the second show, and they were a

848
01:10:01.479 --> 01:10:06.000
bit they're a bit tired, perhaps a little bit bored.

849
01:10:06.239 --> 01:10:09.279
Maybe they don't really feel in the mood to do

850
01:10:09.359 --> 01:10:17.079
a second show. Maybe perhaps the audience just that they

851
01:10:17.119 --> 01:10:18.680
just wanted to be over and done with so they

852
01:10:18.680 --> 01:10:22.039
can go home. I felt a little bit of that

853
01:10:22.119 --> 01:10:30.720
lackluster sometimes, but that was just from my parents, my brothers.

854
01:10:30.800 --> 01:10:32.479
I mean, they were just there because I had to be,

855
01:10:34.239 --> 01:10:36.720
not when none of us liked each other. So it

856
01:10:36.880 --> 01:10:40.359
was a case of like, Okay, here we go again, people,

857
01:10:40.359 --> 01:10:47.079
birthday two. It's just going through the like like wrote wrote,

858
01:10:47.159 --> 01:10:54.720
isn't it just going through the the the whatever? Going

859
01:10:55.039 --> 01:11:09.720
through going through Happy Birthday two? It was nice, though

860
01:11:10.000 --> 01:11:13.720
it got a bit weird when I got older. I

861
01:11:13.800 --> 01:11:17.760
don't want to kind of hit teenage years. It wasn't

862
01:11:17.760 --> 01:11:21.800
so much like bursting in happy birthday, you know, everyone

863
01:11:21.840 --> 01:11:24.319
burst in. It more like knock on the door, Jason,

864
01:11:25.359 --> 01:11:27.640
knock on the door again. We're going to come in

865
01:11:27.640 --> 01:11:35.079
and surprise your birthday presence. Are you awake, are you dressed? Yeah,

866
01:11:35.239 --> 01:11:39.119
you've got a big clothes over you. Okay, we're going

867
01:11:39.199 --> 01:11:47.800
to come in one and accounted one hundred, one, two, three,

868
01:11:48.119 --> 01:11:53.720
four five. And then they'd come in and they'd be like, oh, surprise,

869
01:11:54.880 --> 01:11:58.600
Well I pretend I was asleep. You know, it just

870
01:11:58.640 --> 01:12:02.800
says I'm walking into me kind of looking like I've

871
01:12:06.640 --> 01:12:11.600
sitting underneath a tent on the bedclothes over. So yeah,

872
01:12:11.640 --> 01:12:19.840
that was good. Yeah, I liked I liked birthdays. But

873
01:12:20.000 --> 01:12:24.079
for me, the main thing about birthdays was the presence,

874
01:12:26.439 --> 01:12:30.239
and it always was, I'll be honest, that's what it

875
01:12:30.319 --> 01:12:37.760
was about. It wasn't really bothered about the attention. You know,

876
01:12:37.960 --> 01:12:42.560
have an attention on me. What it wasn't always. I

877
01:12:42.600 --> 01:12:45.560
mean it was positive attention, but you know, throughout the

878
01:12:45.640 --> 01:12:48.600
year learned that I try and stay in the background.

879
01:12:49.159 --> 01:12:51.840
Don't want attention on me because then you don't know

880
01:12:51.840 --> 01:12:54.880
what's going to come up. I don't know what you know,

881
01:12:54.920 --> 01:12:57.840
what subject is going to be arisen. So I just like, okay,

882
01:12:58.520 --> 01:13:02.239
it's yeah, I like it, but let's just focus on

883
01:13:02.279 --> 01:13:08.439
something else now while I play with my new toys. Yeah,

884
01:13:08.479 --> 01:13:13.239
I did like. I like getting gifts. That's what birthdays

885
01:13:13.239 --> 01:13:26.279
are about. Yeah, it's been a long time since I don't. Yeah,

886
01:13:26.439 --> 01:13:31.840
I have had presents, but it's hardly I mean, I've

887
01:13:31.880 --> 01:13:35.760
got two birthday cards that I've been given, which is nice.

888
01:13:37.920 --> 01:13:45.119
So I've received those Thursday, I think, and that's for

889
01:13:45.239 --> 01:13:48.960
my dad and my brother. And that's it. So two

890
01:13:49.000 --> 01:13:57.680
birthday cards for this year. It's not that I want thousands,

891
01:13:57.760 --> 01:13:59.640
but you know, a couple of hundred to be nice,

892
01:14:02.239 --> 01:14:08.600
just a couple of hundred, even one hundred and eighty six.

893
01:14:10.119 --> 01:14:15.039
You know, I don't want much and this there is

894
01:14:15.039 --> 01:14:17.039
a fifty pound not in each one as well, you know,

895
01:14:17.439 --> 01:14:19.079
apart from now, I don't want much.

896
01:14:20.960 --> 01:14:24.920
No no, I don't no, no, no, no, no, no

897
01:14:24.920 --> 01:14:25.600
no now.

898
01:14:31.520 --> 01:14:35.479
And that I do believe is me talking a bunch

899
01:14:35.560 --> 01:14:43.560
of rubbish for about seventy five minutes and I don't

900
01:14:43.600 --> 01:14:49.199
know what I've talked about. It's a happy birthday little

901
01:14:49.199 --> 01:14:56.279
brother as well. It is happy birthday to you forty seven.

902
01:14:56.560 --> 01:15:00.359
It's amazing, it's great. It's the thing is you know,

903
01:15:00.439 --> 01:15:05.880
all seriousness. My little brother's you know, good bloke. He's yeah,

904
01:15:07.199 --> 01:15:12.119
he's a good one. So yeah, I wish him well.

905
01:15:14.199 --> 01:15:23.000
After all that BlimE me, I'm going to go. Oh

906
01:15:23.479 --> 01:15:27.159
I could eat I could eat an Obolet really eat

907
01:15:27.199 --> 01:15:34.000
an omelok right now? Mm hmmm, So I'm going to go.

908
01:15:34.640 --> 01:15:39.119
Thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself

909
01:15:39.159 --> 01:15:47.039
because you do deserve to be happy. Lots of love, Bye,

910
01:15:52.600 --> 01:16:07.199
Relax in a more deep and meaningful way, maybe in

911
01:16:07.239 --> 01:16:12.800
a way that can not just allow you to feel

912
01:16:14.119 --> 01:16:23.359
calmer now and throughout the time we spend together here,

913
01:16:25.399 --> 01:16:31.079
not just relaxed at the end of the recording when

914
01:16:31.119 --> 01:16:37.800
it's finished and you can enjoy that sense of comfort

915
01:16:37.960 --> 01:16:52.880
and peace, but also I think it would be nice

916
01:16:52.960 --> 01:17:12.800
to have those feelings of relaxation continue for longer after

917
01:17:12.840 --> 01:17:23.439
the recording has ended, so that you can still benefit

918
01:17:26.319 --> 01:17:33.600
from listening to my voice, maybe in a few hours time,

919
01:17:35.479 --> 01:17:48.960
perhaps tomorrow, and then by listening regularly, especially if you

920
01:17:49.159 --> 01:17:53.840
find like some people do and myself as well. I

921
01:17:53.960 --> 01:18:00.359
sometimes I find one particular recording that really reson it's

922
01:18:00.399 --> 01:18:06.760
with me, and I just listened to it over and

923
01:18:06.800 --> 01:18:20.159
over again every morning, every evening. There was this recording

924
01:18:20.439 --> 01:18:27.319
from We're going back to about nineteen ninety nine. It

925
01:18:26.880 --> 01:18:32.039
was it wasn't hypnosis, but it was a guided visualizations.

926
01:18:32.119 --> 01:18:39.119
It kind of was hypnosis, really, and I managed to

927
01:18:39.199 --> 01:18:42.720
find it again and it still has the same effect

928
01:18:43.199 --> 01:18:54.840
on me. And part of it was the person's voice

929
01:18:55.239 --> 01:19:06.000
relaxed me, felt so peaceful, and I'd look forward to

930
01:19:06.119 --> 01:19:07.720
listening to her.

931
01:19:10.439 --> 01:19:12.000
In the morning and.

932
01:19:11.920 --> 01:19:23.000
In the evening, and I knew before even pressing the

933
01:19:23.039 --> 01:19:31.560
play button that since I've done that, pressed the play button.

934
01:19:32.319 --> 01:19:43.319
This is in the days of CD players pressed the

935
01:19:43.399 --> 01:19:48.720
play button. In fact, it might have even been a

936
01:19:48.800 --> 01:19:53.359
tape tape recorder. I'd lie down on the bed and

937
01:19:53.399 --> 01:20:11.840
then even without necessarily listening to her words because I

938
01:20:11.960 --> 01:20:19.439
had them memorized. Really, it was as if my body

939
01:20:21.319 --> 01:20:34.800
knew exactly what to do, and the muscles just almost

940
01:20:34.840 --> 01:20:55.239
went into automatic relaxation, and I remember my mind would

941
01:20:55.319 --> 01:21:06.680
slow down. Now. Now, I was listening to this recording

942
01:21:10.039 --> 01:21:16.079
in the early days of learning hypnosis, and long before

943
01:21:17.680 --> 01:21:25.760
I ever made any videos or audio recordings myself, because

944
01:21:25.760 --> 01:21:29.159
I didn't start doing that till two thousand and six.

945
01:21:35.720 --> 01:21:41.800
I knew, I knew how.

946
01:21:43.159 --> 01:21:56.960
Helpful I found being able to just let go, to

947
01:21:57.079 --> 01:22:02.279
have that trust in the person that I'm listening to,

948
01:22:09.920 --> 01:22:16.680
knowing that it's going to be just as relaxing, if

949
01:22:18.079 --> 01:22:27.479
not more so. Each time you hear my voice, you

950
01:22:27.560 --> 01:22:39.239
may feel the same. Some people have been listening to

951
01:22:39.279 --> 01:22:53.159
me for over a decade. Maybe not solidly, obviously, not

952
01:22:53.199 --> 01:22:59.520
twenty four hours a day, but maybe people come back.

953
01:23:01.359 --> 01:23:15.039
Some people may be listen every day and something that

954
01:23:15.119 --> 01:23:28.119
I do, which you may not realize by listening. Is

955
01:23:32.199 --> 01:23:47.399
when I record these recordings now, for example, I also

956
01:23:48.039 --> 01:23:59.279
am affected by the words that I say. So if

957
01:23:59.319 --> 01:24:08.439
I said to you, focus on your feet, notice your

958
01:24:08.520 --> 01:24:20.479
feet relaxing, I will be focusing on my feet. I

959
01:24:20.560 --> 01:24:38.319
will be noticing my feet relaxing. If I said, focus

960
01:24:38.399 --> 01:24:47.399
on your hands, and maybe notice the difference between each hand,

961
01:24:50.399 --> 01:24:57.159
perhaps notice the the air in the room, the temperature

962
01:24:57.239 --> 01:25:09.119
of the room. On the acts of your hands, you

963
01:25:09.199 --> 01:25:13.279
may start to notice what almost feels like a very

964
01:25:13.439 --> 01:25:21.800
light breeze, even though there may not be any type

965
01:25:21.800 --> 01:25:34.760
of breeze at all where you are right now. And

966
01:25:34.840 --> 01:25:46.039
as you become aware of your hands, I'm also aware

967
01:25:48.720 --> 01:26:14.119
of how relaxed my hands are feeling now. And when

968
01:26:14.159 --> 01:26:21.119
it comes to potentially drifting off to sleep, which may

969
01:26:21.159 --> 01:26:37.520
be the reason you're listening, I also feel drowsy when

970
01:26:37.560 --> 01:26:50.800
I make these recordings. I also notice my mind drifting.

971
01:26:58.680 --> 01:27:10.199
In fact, at time names I've actually fallen asleep without

972
01:27:10.279 --> 01:27:24.279
even noticing. And then I carry on talking. And it's

973
01:27:24.319 --> 01:27:33.359
only when I listen back to do the editing I

974
01:27:33.479 --> 01:27:42.760
hear snoring and I think I don't remember snoring. I

975
01:27:42.800 --> 01:27:53.680
remember talking. This snoring was a pig turned up. That's

976
01:27:53.680 --> 01:28:01.159
why I sound like when I snare, how I get

977
01:28:01.239 --> 01:28:15.239
really into the whole experience. I don't know how you feel.

978
01:28:21.399 --> 01:28:28.000
How relaxed do you feel in your feet, how relaxed

979
01:28:31.800 --> 01:28:52.880
you feel in your hands. I have noticed more and

980
01:28:53.119 --> 01:29:09.439
more that the more more relaxed, deeper level of comfort

981
01:29:11.399 --> 01:29:26.600
you feel, the easier your breathing becomes. It's almost like

982
01:29:29.399 --> 01:29:47.439
that additional muscle relaxation. So this allows you to breathe

983
01:29:47.800 --> 01:30:13.359
easier without necessarily h focusing on your breath, however, being

984
01:30:13.439 --> 01:30:43.119
able to notice the ease in which you breathe so naturally.

985
01:30:57.760 --> 01:31:36.079
You breathe so very easily and smoothly. Whenever I imagine

986
01:31:40.399 --> 01:31:56.479
my breathing improving, when I've got my eyes closed, I

987
01:31:56.720 --> 01:32:10.199
tend to visualize a beautiful field with trees and flowers

988
01:32:17.000 --> 01:32:50.000
producing all that life giving oxygen. It feels nice too,

989
01:32:51.600 --> 01:33:10.560
if nothing else, just taking some time away from everything,

990
01:33:21.840 --> 01:33:54.399
enjoying that feeling of peace serenity with a joyful heart.

991
01:34:19.720 --> 01:34:45.239
Time seems to just drip by so very slowly, relaxed,

992
01:34:51.119 --> 01:35:30.279
so deeply peaceful, completely unattached to any thoughts whatsoever in

993
01:35:30.439 --> 01:36:40.760
this moment, completely free, noticing that your mind has slowed down,

994
01:36:43.119 --> 01:37:29.840
slowed down because nothing really requires your attention. You can

995
01:37:30.079 --> 01:37:46.199
enjoy the physical sensations of allowing the stress to rip

996
01:37:46.920 --> 01:38:00.479
out of your body, to appear out of every heart

997
01:38:06.720 --> 01:38:30.760
of your body, and being released from your brain. In

998
01:38:31.279 --> 01:39:22.760
your mind slowly but surely, the muscle se lx relax

999
01:39:27.760 --> 01:40:17.920
rex rex so very deeply, rex so deeply. And the feelings,

1000
01:40:20.560 --> 01:40:45.479
the pleasant feelings in your arms and shoulders, deepening each

1001
01:40:45.840 --> 01:41:25.199
part of your body further and deeper and deeper. Noticing

1002
01:41:27.159 --> 01:41:53.720
the feelings in the back of your neck, the feelings

1003
01:41:53.880 --> 01:42:42.720
in your wrists, muscles, in front of your body. I

1004
01:42:42.920 --> 01:43:26.800
all say, feeling peaceful deeply, there's a sense of peace

1005
01:43:31.279 --> 01:44:11.199
spreads through your fairy core. Even when you focus on

1006
01:44:11.279 --> 01:45:10.279
your mind, your mind becomes eve and slower, even deeper, relax,

1007
01:45:34.279 --> 01:46:12.199
so very slow, his stomach peace full in your stomach,

1008
01:46:34.319 --> 01:47:08.399
you're back. Notice Notice how relaxed you'd now fear in

1009
01:47:08.560 --> 01:47:41.319
the hole of your back. You spy from your brain

1010
01:47:41.800 --> 01:47:49.600
all the way down the middle of your back, sending

1011
01:47:49.920 --> 01:48:24.279
and receiving millions of messages every day, deep comfort, increasing deeply,

1012
01:48:24.720 --> 01:49:30.239
relaxed uns relegs, spreading those signals down a spine or

1013
01:49:30.359 --> 01:49:53.680
cord into air, every part of your body, your shins

1014
01:49:53.920 --> 01:50:44.680
and your calf muscles, we elbows, Feelings of peace and

1015
01:50:44.800 --> 01:51:02.880
tranquility spreading through your body, tips of your toes, to

1016
01:51:02.960 --> 01:51:27.399
your eyes, your fingers, all the way till you lower back. Lettinker,

1017
01:51:29.640 --> 01:52:39.840
read the tinker. Peace drifting mind just wandering away, happy

1018
01:52:40.640 --> 01:53:21.119
to let go, let go completely, let go, so tranquil,

1019
01:53:45.239 --> 01:54:21.199
the whole body enjoying a sense of listening, gud he

1020
01:54:22.359 --> 01:56:21.239
for more, pece, enjoying the space, this space of peace.

1021
01:56:24.359 --> 01:57:39.479
And safety, so very relaxed, y y.

1022
01:57:54.079 --> 01:58:51.439
Y, letting go. Maybe we can just focus on the

1023
01:58:51.600 --> 01:59:49.720
different parts of your body, just to notice.

1024
01:59:25.840 --> 01:59:29.079
You fool head and your eyes.

1025
02:00:01.079 --> 02:00:46.880
Uture so loose, noticing the sense of complete freedom, absolute

1026
02:00:47.279 --> 02:02:42.279
freedom es day, peace for energy, peace to breathe, so

1027
02:02:42.560 --> 02:02:45.279
much easier.

1028
02:03:26.159 --> 02:03:26.479
Loose.

1029
02:03:47.760 --> 02:03:59.319
You may have or may not have noticed your mind

1030
02:04:00.119 --> 02:05:01.520
drifting peaceful me even more deeply in the direction of

1031
02:05:06.640 --> 02:07:02.239
total blissful pace, blissful pace, terrefting out to pace. Come

1032
02:07:07.880 --> 02:08:32.600
so calm, letting go peace with mind Rex forty So relaxed, relaxed.

1033
02:08:56.880 --> 02:09:29.439
Your body feels almost invisible, so the very relaxed. I'm peaceful,

1034
02:09:30.079 --> 02:10:39.479
so peaceful, relax m like, and you could start to

1035
02:10:39.720 --> 02:10:49.239
notice that you are feeling more relaxed, even though I've

1036
02:10:49.600 --> 02:11:01.319
not purposely focused your mind upon that sense of physical

1037
02:11:01.560 --> 02:11:09.439
comfort that is growing within you throughout your body, and

1038
02:11:09.479 --> 02:11:19.279
your mind starts to slow down, and that could be

1039
02:11:19.840 --> 02:11:27.800
almost in recognition of I guess my speech not being

1040
02:11:28.000 --> 02:11:45.319
particularly fast and things just generally feel calmer. Just by

1041
02:11:46.159 --> 02:11:55.319
listening to my voice, you give yourself an opportunity to

1042
02:11:55.439 --> 02:12:01.439
take a break from the day, take a break from

1043
02:12:02.079 --> 02:12:09.439
your life as it is, and to give yourself a rest,

1044
02:12:12.000 --> 02:12:19.279
giving yourself permission to take some time off, and to

1045
02:12:19.399 --> 02:12:25.319
allow your body to relax and allow your mind to

1046
02:12:25.479 --> 02:12:36.800
slow down, which in turn releases the tension and he

1047
02:12:37.000 --> 02:12:45.960
stresses that you had in your body. It's almost as

1048
02:12:45.960 --> 02:12:51.800
if the parts of your body just open up, allowing

1049
02:12:51.880 --> 02:13:03.840
the negativity out and at the same time replacing that

1050
02:13:04.039 --> 02:13:13.680
nectivity with positive heathing energy, which then fills your body

1051
02:13:13.760 --> 02:13:26.439
up and your mind to also starts to appreciate those

1052
02:13:26.760 --> 02:13:44.479
feelings of increasing confidence, an almost uplifting feeling, positive healing,

1053
02:13:47.600 --> 02:13:56.199
an energy that spreads through your body like a wave

1054
02:13:58.479 --> 02:14:10.680
of comfort. And all this comes from just allowing yourself

1055
02:14:13.439 --> 02:14:18.680
a few minutes, maybe half an hour, however long you

1056
02:14:18.760 --> 02:14:31.319
want it to be, to just rest and allow your

1057
02:14:31.439 --> 02:14:42.000
mind and your body to almost reset itself to the

1058
02:14:42.039 --> 02:14:57.920
settings of comfort and relaxation, calmness which allows more room

1059
02:14:58.399 --> 02:15:11.079
for fear, millions of pleasure and happiness to move around

1060
02:15:11.279 --> 02:15:19.520
your body and into your mind, almost as if your

1061
02:15:19.640 --> 02:15:30.199
mind and your body are sinking together, almost mirroring each

1062
02:15:30.439 --> 02:15:46.000
other with that growing positivity and calmness, And it feels nice.

1063
02:15:46.159 --> 02:15:52.199
It really does feel nice to know that you are

1064
02:15:52.239 --> 02:16:02.399
the one that has allowed yourself to feel more comfort

1065
02:16:05.640 --> 02:16:19.159
and to experience more of this deep relaxation spreading throughout

1066
02:16:19.199 --> 02:16:31.439
your body. And as I focus on each part of

1067
02:16:31.520 --> 02:16:44.000
your body, you can notice that that part becomes even

1068
02:16:44.959 --> 02:16:54.280
more relaxed just by focusing on it. It becomes even

1069
02:16:54.479 --> 02:17:07.200
more calm and comfortable just by focusing. And as I

1070
02:17:07.399 --> 02:17:15.760
move down your body, starting at your head, the parts

1071
02:17:15.840 --> 02:17:23.280
that you've already focused on will continue to relax deeply,

1072
02:17:26.040 --> 02:17:32.079
and those parts that we've not yet focused on or

1073
02:17:32.239 --> 02:17:43.520
just automatically release any remain in tension in anticipation of

1074
02:17:43.719 --> 02:17:56.639
even more comfort about to come. Now, I'm going to

1075
02:17:56.680 --> 02:18:03.799
start by focusing on your forehead, just being aware of

1076
02:18:04.079 --> 02:18:14.159
the feelings of your forehead, and any background sounds like

1077
02:18:14.399 --> 02:18:19.559
mister Herbert the pigeon can just allow you to feel

1078
02:18:19.600 --> 02:18:29.680
even more relaxed. Just means you're in the moment. This

1079
02:18:29.760 --> 02:18:36.959
isn't this isn't a sterile environment. This is the world.

1080
02:18:38.360 --> 02:18:44.399
I live in the countryside, so there's lots of nature

1081
02:18:44.920 --> 02:18:55.440
sounds around. So as you focus on your forehead, just

1082
02:18:55.680 --> 02:19:04.000
notice how it becomes even more relaxed as you focus

1083
02:19:05.760 --> 02:19:14.520
only on my voice and that part of your body.

1084
02:19:15.440 --> 02:19:23.760
Moving down to your eyes, Focusing on your eyes, noticing

1085
02:19:26.200 --> 02:19:35.920
how your eyelids feel so heavy yet so light at

1086
02:19:35.920 --> 02:19:42.399
the same time, and all the muscles around your eyes

1087
02:19:42.639 --> 02:19:57.120
relaxing completely. Moving your focus down to your mouth, your lips,

1088
02:19:57.520 --> 02:20:04.200
your tongue, your teeth, if you comes, the whole of

1089
02:20:04.319 --> 02:20:19.319
your mouth, relaxing, calm and lease. As you focus now

1090
02:20:19.920 --> 02:20:26.799
on your jaw, not just the parts of your jaw

1091
02:20:26.959 --> 02:20:31.399
near your mouth and your chin, but all the way

1092
02:20:31.479 --> 02:20:37.799
up the size of your face to your ears, that

1093
02:20:38.079 --> 02:20:49.520
hole of your jaw feeding more relaxed.

1094
02:20:52.959 --> 02:21:00.399
And calm.

1095
02:21:01.840 --> 02:21:11.000
Focusing on your neck, the front of your neck and

1096
02:21:11.040 --> 02:21:24.079
your throat relaxing and loose and calm. The side of

1097
02:21:24.159 --> 02:21:29.479
your neck, the right and left side of your neck

1098
02:21:32.399 --> 02:21:48.239
relax and loose and calm, and now the back of

1099
02:21:48.319 --> 02:22:01.200
your neck. Focusing on the back of your neck, letting

1100
02:22:01.360 --> 02:22:06.040
go of any tension that may have been there before,

1101
02:22:07.799 --> 02:22:21.920
and enjoying that sense of increasing comfort and release that

1102
02:22:22.120 --> 02:22:32.559
you can experience in the back of your neck. Moving

1103
02:22:32.799 --> 02:22:39.600
down your back and moving either side of your spine

1104
02:22:40.680 --> 02:22:41.920
right from the top of.

1105
02:22:41.879 --> 02:22:42.760
Your back.

1106
02:22:44.360 --> 02:22:48.040
All the way down to the bottom of your back

1107
02:22:54.000 --> 02:23:05.360
down to your lower back. And as you move up

1108
02:23:05.399 --> 02:23:14.200
and down your spine, you can feel the muscles either

1109
02:23:14.319 --> 02:23:27.920
side of your spine relaxing even more. And as those

1110
02:23:28.040 --> 02:23:37.520
muscles relax, that sense of comfort starts to spread outwards

1111
02:23:39.040 --> 02:23:48.719
from your spine into both sides of your back, the

1112
02:23:48.760 --> 02:23:52.280
top of your back, the middle and your lower back.

1113
02:23:55.760 --> 02:24:02.959
And as you scan gently and slowly up and down

1114
02:24:03.120 --> 02:24:07.639
your back, there's the muscles.

1115
02:24:07.200 --> 02:24:11.200
In the top of your back relax.

1116
02:24:10.920 --> 02:24:18.559
And become looser. The muscles in the middle of your

1117
02:24:18.600 --> 02:24:26.079
back also seem to just almost divide from each other,

1118
02:24:27.000 --> 02:24:43.239
separating and almost melting, And in your lower back there

1119
02:24:43.319 --> 02:24:56.000
seems to be an extra special feeling of comfort. The

1120
02:24:56.360 --> 02:25:02.680
spreads into your hips sit down your lower back, into

1121
02:25:02.719 --> 02:25:14.040
your hips, into the area where your cocksix are and

1122
02:25:14.159 --> 02:25:23.559
into your buttocks, and all these muscles that spread.

1123
02:25:22.920 --> 02:25:24.239
From your lower back.

1124
02:25:26.399 --> 02:25:38.680
Into your hip area start to melt, start to really

1125
02:25:39.840 --> 02:25:50.559
let go. I don't even know where about. To focus

1126
02:25:50.680 --> 02:25:57.760
on your shoulders. Your back and your spine will continue

1127
02:25:59.760 --> 02:26:18.319
to let go, continue to relax so calmly. And as

1128
02:26:18.360 --> 02:26:23.840
you focus on your shoulders, you may notice that they're

1129
02:26:23.879 --> 02:26:54.200
already feeding really loose. They're already feeding calm, and they're

1130
02:26:54.440 --> 02:27:06.479
feeling those muscles us. The move from your neck into

1131
02:27:06.520 --> 02:27:25.600
your shoulders feel so soft and gentle, so smooth.

1132
02:27:31.120 --> 02:27:43.479
And calm.

1133
02:27:43.520 --> 02:27:56.399
The feeding in your shoulders seins to spread deep into

1134
02:27:56.440 --> 02:28:06.879
your shoulders, that sense of relaxation, not just traveling deeply

1135
02:28:07.280 --> 02:28:24.239
into your muscles, but also relaxing the bones and moving

1136
02:28:24.360 --> 02:28:33.200
all away to underneath your arms, relaxing that whole area

1137
02:28:33.360 --> 02:28:38.399
between the tops of your shoulders and underneath your arms.

1138
02:28:42.600 --> 02:28:57.799
He Then you feel so relaxed and comfortable in your shoulders,

1139
02:29:01.319 --> 02:29:23.719
which sends that deep healing message into your arms. You

1140
02:29:23.840 --> 02:29:29.559
may feel almost as if your arms are not even there,

1141
02:29:31.079 --> 02:30:07.799
because they're so relaxed, so deeply relaxed, so so calm,

1142
02:30:08.079 --> 02:30:30.000
so loose, not feeling spreading all the way down your arms,

1143
02:30:32.680 --> 02:31:02.680
two elbows, including your elbows, circumforts, spreads or away interists

1144
02:31:05.600 --> 02:31:21.559
of forearments, induists, being so heavy yet at the same

1145
02:31:22.799 --> 02:32:01.639
time so light and gentle. Frey. You see.

1146
02:32:03.799 --> 02:32:31.559
Now on your hands, my hands.

1147
02:32:37.440 --> 02:33:02.079
So peaceful. In your hands, there's the sense of.

1148
02:33:05.559 --> 02:33:07.000
Real peace.

1149
02:33:18.760 --> 02:33:32.520
It just seems to feel so familiar when your hands

1150
02:33:32.879 --> 02:33:35.159
relax deeply.

1151
02:33:44.600 --> 02:34:03.600
Else a thing is.

1152
02:34:35.719 --> 02:35:41.239
A thing is sad your finger tips, moving your attention

1153
02:35:42.639 --> 02:36:10.280
to the front of your body, so comfortable, move in

1154
02:36:10.559 --> 02:37:55.040
your focus, you your legs, musculs, in your thighs, your knees,

1155
02:37:59.079 --> 02:39:29.479
sol a carved muscles and just hins co pusyly four

1156
02:40:35.920 --> 02:40:57.440
and feathing your feats, so peaceful, so calm, so peaceful,

1157
02:41:04.559 --> 02:42:06.159
sircom so peaceful, sircom so peace for recin, yeah, peace for.

1158
02:42:10.000 --> 02:42:11.120
So calm.

1159
02:42:18.920 --> 02:42:26.079
Allowing that deep relaxation to spread your chest and your

1160
02:42:26.239 --> 02:42:57.319
stomach so real, letting go of everything. So I'm gonna

1161
02:42:57.319 --> 02:43:09.200
start counting down now, from twenty down to one. You

1162
02:43:09.280 --> 02:43:12.760
can imagine in a way it's like just walking down

1163
02:43:12.879 --> 02:43:18.639
some steps and each step or twenty steps, and each

1164
02:43:18.799 --> 02:43:31.479
step represents a level of comfort, each step represents a

1165
02:43:31.680 --> 02:43:44.159
deepening of that comfort, and the fervies you walk down

1166
02:43:44.280 --> 02:43:49.680
those steps that are deeper and more relaxed you feel.

1167
02:43:56.399 --> 02:46:31.280
So starting with number twenty twenty nineteen eighteen seventeen siksting

1168
02:47:46.799 --> 02:54:56.079
eight four four two two well five five nine hey.

1169
02:55:55.639 --> 03:01:37.120
Seven five.

1170
02:59:05.639 --> 03:04:42.120
Four four yo one. And now as you focus on

1171
03:04:42.239 --> 03:04:55.760
your eyes, we're gonna count down from ten douts one.

1172
03:05:02.120 --> 03:05:11.159
Focus in just on your eyes, your eyelids, the muscles

1173
03:05:11.319 --> 03:05:20.239
around your eyes, your eye walls themselves, a whole area

1174
03:05:23.200 --> 03:05:37.159
that makes up your eye. And as we count down

1175
03:05:37.399 --> 03:05:45.719
from ten down to one, whilst focus in on your eyes,

1176
03:05:52.079 --> 03:06:02.959
you'll become twice is relaxed. We've each number counting down

1177
03:06:07.079 --> 03:06:14.040
and you may find the all you want to do

1178
03:06:14.559 --> 03:06:23.520
is just drift off to sleep. And if that's what

1179
03:06:23.799 --> 03:06:36.319
you want, then just allow yourself to do that. Now,

1180
03:06:39.280 --> 03:06:45.639
focusing on your eyes, I'm going to begin counting down

1181
03:06:47.200 --> 03:06:49.200
from ten down to one.

1182
03:06:53.200 --> 03:06:53.879
Right now.

1183
03:07:02.200 --> 03:08:58.079
Two nine eight seven.

1184
03:09:56.799 --> 03:11:56.879
Y five.

1185
03:12:12.280 --> 03:16:16.520
Four three two one. So counting down from ten to

1186
03:16:16.639 --> 03:16:43.200
one ten nine eight seven six five four three two one.

1187
03:16:50.239 --> 03:16:53.120
And maybe that was a bit too quick in order

1188
03:16:53.200 --> 03:16:57.120
to relax. Maybe it's a bit too fast for you

1189
03:16:57.479 --> 03:17:07.120
to notice the calming of your body, maybe even a

1190
03:17:07.200 --> 03:17:11.040
little bit of pressure there, like you're counting down from

1191
03:17:11.120 --> 03:17:13.760
ten to one. Would you expect me to do man,

1192
03:17:14.719 --> 03:17:19.280
expect me to stick go floppy just because you're counting down.

1193
03:17:24.879 --> 03:17:28.159
We could try it again, but this time I go

1194
03:17:28.319 --> 03:17:35.680
this lower. This time, as you focus on the whole

1195
03:17:35.799 --> 03:17:42.040
of your body before we focus on your legs. Just

1196
03:17:42.280 --> 03:17:52.280
notice how your body does start to feel more relaxed

1197
03:17:57.040 --> 03:18:31.840
with every number that I countdown ten nine, eight, seven, six,

1198
03:18:40.280 --> 03:19:46.719
five four three h two one, And just notice how

1199
03:19:49.120 --> 03:19:58.559
how you feel generally, how your body feels. It's not

1200
03:19:58.760 --> 03:20:09.760
necessarily even about counting down from ten to one. It's

1201
03:20:09.840 --> 03:20:27.000
that space that you have, that space between being active

1202
03:20:29.360 --> 03:20:38.879
physically or mentally to just sitting or lying down, just

1203
03:20:39.120 --> 03:20:45.000
being there, not doing anything, not saying anything, or needing

1204
03:20:45.280 --> 03:20:50.719
to think about anything. So that opens up a space,

1205
03:20:51.719 --> 03:21:00.840
you know, a bit of a space, a gap. And

1206
03:21:00.959 --> 03:21:05.520
the more I came down from ten to one, the

1207
03:21:05.600 --> 03:21:13.600
bigger that gap becomes. So there's that gap of calmness,

1208
03:21:15.000 --> 03:21:30.680
of comfort, relaxation. It's a nice feeling, and it moves

1209
03:21:32.239 --> 03:21:42.159
those stresses or discomforts physically or emotionally, moves them away.

1210
03:21:48.920 --> 03:21:49.920
Allows you.

1211
03:21:52.600 --> 03:21:53.120
To just.

1212
03:21:56.120 --> 03:22:02.840
Slow down. Someone to count again from ten down to one.

1213
03:22:03.239 --> 03:22:13.479
And notice that gap widening, the gap, and as it widens,

1214
03:22:13.559 --> 03:22:19.600
it's almost like the stress and attention falls into the

1215
03:22:19.680 --> 03:23:16.399
gap and gives you that distance, that space. Now ten nine, eight, seven, six,

1216
03:23:29.120 --> 03:24:47.319
five four three two one. And how did it look?

1217
03:24:49.399 --> 03:25:09.120
Body feel? No, can you notice that you feeling calmer,

1218
03:25:17.239 --> 03:25:46.079
the feeling more relaxed. As we now focus on your legs,

1219
03:25:47.799 --> 03:26:07.319
just your legs. We're just going to start with focusing

1220
03:26:08.200 --> 03:26:27.520
on your thighs. Of course, it's not the most exciting

1221
03:26:27.680 --> 03:26:34.360
thing to be doing, because I'm sure like most of

1222
03:26:34.440 --> 03:26:37.120
your body is not a lot going on right now.

1223
03:26:46.239 --> 03:26:52.520
Just focusing on the whole of your thighs, the tops

1224
03:26:52.559 --> 03:26:58.639
of your thighs, the sides of your thighs, the bottoms

1225
03:26:58.680 --> 03:27:03.159
of your thighs, your outer thighs, and your inner thighs.

1226
03:27:05.399 --> 03:27:09.280
Basically the whole of your thigh that leads into your

1227
03:27:09.440 --> 03:27:24.319
hip and it goes down to your knee joints. Now,

1228
03:27:24.399 --> 03:27:31.399
this is a big area. It's a very heavy area.

1229
03:27:31.920 --> 03:27:37.920
It's very strong. Probably the strongest muscles in your body

1230
03:27:38.520 --> 03:27:52.879
are in your thighs. But I don't think we perhaps

1231
03:27:54.920 --> 03:28:07.600
give enough attention to our thighs. Perhaps we don't acknowledge

1232
03:28:08.280 --> 03:28:27.680
how important our thighs are to our lives, how much

1233
03:28:30.319 --> 03:28:43.799
they actually do for us all through our lives. And

1234
03:28:43.920 --> 03:28:49.760
it may seem sound really weird, but I think that

1235
03:28:49.959 --> 03:28:57.840
all of our body parts, especially our thighs, needs some TLC,

1236
03:29:01.159 --> 03:29:14.360
a bit of love shone, a bit of acknowledgement, thank you,

1237
03:29:17.520 --> 03:29:29.840
gratitude for what our thighs do for us. And I

1238
03:29:29.959 --> 03:29:35.680
know this may sound a bit strange. Maybe you think,

1239
03:29:36.079 --> 03:29:38.879
why am I sure that I should be out in

1240
03:29:39.000 --> 03:29:47.520
the garden hugging a tree or something. Well, it's hard

1241
03:29:47.600 --> 03:29:50.719
to set a microphone up on a tree. That's why

1242
03:29:50.760 --> 03:29:53.440
I'm doing this indoors. Otherwise I would be outside hugging

1243
03:29:53.479 --> 03:29:56.959
a tree. Now I can't see the television from the tree.

1244
03:30:03.639 --> 03:30:07.920
If you move down to your knees gaining such an

1245
03:30:08.000 --> 03:30:17.719
important part, and I think we don't necessarily I'll speak

1246
03:30:17.760 --> 03:30:25.079
for myself here, I don't necessarily appreciate all that my

1247
03:30:25.200 --> 03:30:30.440
knees do for me until I have a problem with

1248
03:30:30.559 --> 03:30:33.120
my knee. It's occasionally, if.

1249
03:30:33.000 --> 03:30:33.360
I ever.

1250
03:30:34.799 --> 03:30:38.760
Maybe i'll pash it or it's aching for some reason.

1251
03:30:40.479 --> 03:30:46.680
It's then that I realize how much it does. You know,

1252
03:30:46.760 --> 03:30:52.719
the benefit of being able to use my legs without

1253
03:30:54.479 --> 03:31:01.719
any kind of physical discomfort is a beautiful thing that's

1254
03:31:01.959 --> 03:31:10.360
possibly not appreciated until it's temporarily removed. You know that's comfort.

1255
03:31:14.440 --> 03:31:19.079
But as you focus on your knees, regardless of how

1256
03:31:19.120 --> 03:31:26.639
your knees feel, you can have that sense of gratitude

1257
03:31:28.159 --> 03:31:30.760
and love to your knees for all that they do

1258
03:31:30.959 --> 03:31:43.959
for you. And you can still have that attention on

1259
03:31:44.120 --> 03:31:50.280
your thighs and maybe notice how your thighs feel, Maybe

1260
03:31:50.959 --> 03:32:08.559
notice that they are relaxing more deeply as you focus

1261
03:32:08.760 --> 03:32:14.319
now on the bottoms of your legs, your shins and

1262
03:32:14.399 --> 03:32:21.000
your calf muscles, the bones between your knees and your

1263
03:32:21.040 --> 03:32:34.040
feet incorporate, and of course your ankles so important. You know,

1264
03:32:34.120 --> 03:32:38.879
anyone that's had even like the slightest sprain of an

1265
03:32:38.920 --> 03:32:47.040
ankle knows how how much we take our ankles for granted.

1266
03:32:52.959 --> 03:32:54.920
And it's kind of strange in a way when you

1267
03:32:55.040 --> 03:33:00.639
think that. You know, logically, our wrists are a lot

1268
03:33:00.799 --> 03:33:05.600
thinner than the rest of our arms, which is okay,

1269
03:33:05.719 --> 03:33:09.600
it doesn't can't see any problem with that because we're

1270
03:33:09.680 --> 03:33:16.120
just picking stuff up. But our ankles so much thinner

1271
03:33:17.399 --> 03:33:25.959
than the rest of our legs, and from a physics

1272
03:33:26.000 --> 03:33:31.719
perspective or logical even it doesn't really make sense that

1273
03:33:31.920 --> 03:33:39.639
all this weight would ultimately be resting on your ankles

1274
03:33:40.760 --> 03:33:54.159
then leading to your feet, that thin area, thin bone. Yeah,

1275
03:33:54.239 --> 03:33:59.840
it does so much great work. Supports us, supports our

1276
03:34:00.079 --> 03:34:11.799
body for a lifetime, helps us to balance, It helps

1277
03:34:11.840 --> 03:34:24.440
you to get her around and be mobile. And there's

1278
03:34:24.479 --> 03:34:32.360
the calf muscles. Of course, when I was younger, I

1279
03:34:32.399 --> 03:34:35.639
couldn't see the point in calf muscles. I didn't seem

1280
03:34:35.680 --> 03:34:40.760
to do anything. Okay, if I walked around on tiptoes,

1281
03:34:41.520 --> 03:34:45.399
then my calf muscles get some work. But of course

1282
03:34:45.479 --> 03:34:49.600
that's not true. The calf muscles are being used whenever

1283
03:34:49.680 --> 03:35:01.600
we use her legs and your shins there to protect

1284
03:35:03.559 --> 03:35:12.239
your lower legs, shaped in a way, almost as a

1285
03:35:12.280 --> 03:35:24.559
protector for the bone, leading of course to your ankles

1286
03:35:27.959 --> 03:35:34.520
and your feet. But we're not going to focus on

1287
03:35:34.639 --> 03:35:36.719
your feet. We're just going to focus on the legs.

1288
03:35:38.799 --> 03:35:43.440
I realize that now that I've mentioned your feet, it

1289
03:35:43.559 --> 03:35:48.479
probably focusing on them anyway, So maybe I should focus

1290
03:35:48.559 --> 03:35:54.399
on your feet a little bit. You can have them

1291
03:35:54.440 --> 03:35:59.799
in your awareness, the same as you have your thigh

1292
03:36:00.280 --> 03:36:04.559
in your awareness. Even though we haven't been focusing on

1293
03:36:04.719 --> 03:36:09.440
your thighs for a few minutes, we've been focusing on

1294
03:36:09.600 --> 03:36:26.799
your ankles. There's still that sensation of comfort in your thighs,

1295
03:36:31.799 --> 03:36:39.120
and this that movement of energy because the thighs hold

1296
03:36:41.079 --> 03:36:46.360
lots of different sensations. Of course, there's the muscles, the

1297
03:36:46.680 --> 03:36:59.159
big straw muscles that we have in our thighs, but

1298
03:36:59.319 --> 03:37:04.959
the skin on the outside of the thighs, as in

1299
03:37:05.479 --> 03:37:11.239
the outside of all of our body, can be very sensitive,

1300
03:37:15.159 --> 03:37:28.319
sensitive to the touch, sensitive to temperature, and inside your

1301
03:37:28.479 --> 03:37:35.920
thighs the bones, there's the muscle, there's the blood, vessels,

1302
03:37:36.079 --> 03:37:41.879
the arch trees, all this stuff that's inside your thighs.

1303
03:37:46.200 --> 03:37:49.360
And I guess sometimes it'd be nice if you could

1304
03:37:49.399 --> 03:37:54.719
actually put your fingers inside your thighs and a message.

1305
03:37:57.239 --> 03:38:00.799
You can message on the outside, of course, but to

1306
03:38:00.840 --> 03:38:04.000
be able to get deep into the muscles, and to

1307
03:38:04.040 --> 03:38:09.159
be able to just massage inside your thighs, message in

1308
03:38:09.239 --> 03:38:17.840
the bones of your leg, massage in all the veins,

1309
03:38:18.040 --> 03:38:28.280
and just gently healing your thighs, and you could move

1310
03:38:28.479 --> 03:38:35.840
down message and inside your knees, just message in those bones,

1311
03:38:36.840 --> 03:38:43.879
but with healing fingertips, spreading that healing energy deep into

1312
03:38:44.000 --> 03:38:53.399
the joints of your knees. Of course, there's the back

1313
03:38:53.639 --> 03:38:58.600
of your your knee, you know, the inside crease where

1314
03:38:58.639 --> 03:39:06.079
your knee is. It's a very sensitive area. Very it

1315
03:39:06.120 --> 03:39:10.000
feels very nice when you stroke it. That might be

1316
03:39:10.159 --> 03:39:14.120
because it's an area that's not really touched very often.

1317
03:39:16.159 --> 03:39:23.000
It's almost like a hidden part, that crease in your legs.

1318
03:39:23.120 --> 03:39:30.440
It's almost like a part that has a sensitivity, which

1319
03:39:30.520 --> 03:39:40.959
is a little bit different. Of course, it's protected by

1320
03:39:41.000 --> 03:39:52.440
your legs, so you can imagine putting your fingers into

1321
03:39:52.520 --> 03:40:02.200
that crease in your legs that fold in between your legs.

1322
03:40:02.920 --> 03:40:07.559
You can just message with your fingertips. Let your fingertips

1323
03:40:07.639 --> 03:40:18.120
going inside, massage in the muscle tissue. You can of

1324
03:40:18.280 --> 03:40:25.360
course field the bones of your knees, healing through your fingertips.

1325
03:40:32.760 --> 03:40:38.040
And then as you go down to your calf muscles.

1326
03:40:38.440 --> 03:40:40.159
Now that's the part I'd like to be able to

1327
03:40:41.000 --> 03:40:48.319
really put my fingertips deep inside my calf muscles, massage

1328
03:40:48.440 --> 03:40:57.520
in every single tissue of that muscle, healing every part,

1329
03:41:03.479 --> 03:41:09.600
and then doing the same for my shins, massage in

1330
03:41:09.760 --> 03:41:17.280
and gently stroking the bones, gently stroking them, hewing in

1331
03:41:17.399 --> 03:41:24.559
a loving way because they deserve to be treated as

1332
03:41:24.639 --> 03:41:28.680
the precious bones that they are, because our legs are

1333
03:41:28.719 --> 03:41:32.479
so precious as in all the other parts of our body,

1334
03:41:35.000 --> 03:41:48.959
and more precious than anyture on the planet. When you

1335
03:41:49.200 --> 03:42:01.360
start to think about your legs in this way, it

1336
03:42:01.440 --> 03:42:11.120
can change your perspective. It might sound a bit a

1337
03:42:11.200 --> 03:42:16.479
bit silly to start with the idea of having love

1338
03:42:17.000 --> 03:42:26.399
for your legs, showing appreciation for your thighs, wanting to

1339
03:42:26.440 --> 03:42:33.120
be able to put your hands in your thighs, massage

1340
03:42:33.920 --> 03:42:39.440
the muscles and the bones, and to get your fingers

1341
03:42:39.760 --> 03:42:49.520
deep in there, releasing all tension, just to show how

1342
03:42:49.680 --> 03:42:57.040
much you care about your legs, how much you care

1343
03:42:57.399 --> 03:43:05.440
for what your legs do for you regularly, your knees,

1344
03:43:05.680 --> 03:43:18.520
your calves, your ankles, the strength of your ankles, considering

1345
03:43:18.719 --> 03:43:23.200
how thin they are compared to the rest of your legs,

1346
03:43:23.360 --> 03:43:37.040
especially your thighs. Yeah, they're so strong, so flexible, absolutely

1347
03:43:37.319 --> 03:43:49.120
amazing things. Your ankles are truly a gift because of

1348
03:43:49.200 --> 03:44:00.479
what they do for you, supporting all that weight, regardless

1349
03:44:01.200 --> 03:44:05.559
how what weight you are, even if you only ate stone,

1350
03:44:07.680 --> 03:44:10.920
there's still a lot of weight for these little ankles.

1351
03:44:14.559 --> 03:44:18.799
Now I'm a lot heavier than eat stone, double down.

1352
03:44:22.319 --> 03:44:31.399
Yet my ankles support my body all the time, although

1353
03:44:31.440 --> 03:44:34.200
they do give off a sigh of relief when I

1354
03:44:34.319 --> 03:44:43.479
sit down. That's got my whole legs do. My feet

1355
03:44:44.719 --> 03:45:10.239
feet also go, my toes clap. I'm so happy. Your

1356
03:45:10.360 --> 03:45:19.680
legs really are amazing. And I know that talking about

1357
03:45:20.200 --> 03:45:26.040
talking about your legs is probably possibly among the most

1358
03:45:26.959 --> 03:45:34.520
most boring things I've ever heard anyone say. Possibly you're

1359
03:45:34.600 --> 03:45:41.440
boring or not. Everything I said is true. Your legs

1360
03:45:42.120 --> 03:46:02.120
are amazing. Your legs deserve not just respect, they deserve

1361
03:46:02.239 --> 03:46:14.639
to relax deeply. They deserve to take some time out

1362
03:46:15.200 --> 03:46:38.680
of the day to just let go completely. The legs

1363
03:46:44.120 --> 03:46:57.360
really can relax. And because the legs are so such

1364
03:46:57.440 --> 03:47:01.920
a most you know, very important part of your body.

1365
03:47:03.239 --> 03:47:05.799
When you relax your legs, the rest of your body

1366
03:47:06.479 --> 03:47:25.239
also naturally follows in that journey of comfort. I can

1367
03:47:25.360 --> 03:47:30.280
feel it in my hips. My hips feel really loose,

1368
03:47:33.600 --> 03:47:37.879
and also in my lower back as well. My lower

1369
03:47:37.959 --> 03:47:43.520
back really feels it feels stretched, even though I'm just

1370
03:47:43.600 --> 03:47:49.840
sitting in a chair and there's no stretching as far

1371
03:47:49.920 --> 03:47:53.000
as I'm aware that I'm doing. It's almost as if

1372
03:47:53.079 --> 03:47:56.959
the muscles are just relaxed. So much that there is

1373
03:47:57.159 --> 03:48:05.600
a natural stretch as the tension has reduced a lot.

1374
03:48:21.959 --> 03:48:25.040
And I'm now going to count down from ten down

1375
03:48:25.120 --> 03:48:36.440
to one, and you can continue to feel wonderfully relaxed.

1376
03:48:40.239 --> 03:48:59.520
Ten nine, eight, seven, six, five.

1377
03:49:03.840 --> 03:49:08.000
Four three.

1378
03:49:11.840 --> 03:49:32.559
Two one relax. So I'm just going to count down

1379
03:49:34.079 --> 03:49:38.799
from five down to one, and as a countdown, if

1380
03:49:38.840 --> 03:49:45.879
you just focus on the numbers, just the numbers counting down,

1381
03:49:46.959 --> 03:49:56.079
and notice how you feel in this moment as you

1382
03:49:56.239 --> 03:50:03.760
hear the numbers counting down, knowing the those numbers counting

1383
03:50:03.840 --> 03:50:14.000
down represent you feeling calmer, not just in your body,

1384
03:50:14.159 --> 03:50:22.520
but also relaxing your mind. I just notice how you feel.

1385
03:50:23.399 --> 03:50:29.319
There's nothing to do, there's nothing to say, there's nothing

1386
03:50:29.440 --> 03:51:06.440
to think about, starting with number five, four three two.

1387
03:51:12.280 --> 03:51:12.479
One.

1388
03:51:21.920 --> 03:51:34.360
And as you notice the gradual letting go the tension

1389
03:51:34.600 --> 03:51:41.719
in your body, you may also begin to notice and

1390
03:51:41.879 --> 03:51:50.879
be aware of how your mind is starting to slow down.

1391
03:51:53.399 --> 03:51:59.680
This is just a natural thing that happens. It's not

1392
03:51:59.799 --> 03:52:05.120
really a special procedure. It's just natural because as your

1393
03:52:06.440 --> 03:52:12.440
body relaxes, your mind also starts to relax. And the

1394
03:52:12.559 --> 03:52:16.159
more your mind relaxes, the more your body relaxes. It's

1395
03:52:16.319 --> 03:52:26.479
just a continuous circle of relaxation, and there is that

1396
03:52:27.799 --> 03:52:35.639
calmness that comes from relative quietness. You know, even even

1397
03:52:35.680 --> 03:52:42.200
if there's background sounds either your side or mind, it's

1398
03:52:42.360 --> 03:52:48.239
still going to be quite calm. You know, you haven't

1399
03:52:48.280 --> 03:52:53.239
got the television on, there's no music in the background

1400
03:52:53.319 --> 03:52:56.000
unless you're listening to the recording. With music, of course,

1401
03:53:00.879 --> 03:53:03.040
you're very likely not going to be sitting in a

1402
03:53:03.159 --> 03:53:06.280
room with other people. Of course you might be, but

1403
03:53:07.559 --> 03:53:10.799
generally it's more ideal if you can do this on

1404
03:53:10.920 --> 03:53:22.239
your own, so no distractions, and when you stop thinking

1405
03:53:22.319 --> 03:53:39.479
about stuff, relaxation automatically rises. A sense of comfort starts

1406
03:53:39.559 --> 03:53:48.319
to grow, and without trying to build it up into

1407
03:53:48.399 --> 03:54:00.559
something fantastical or something magical, this is just a natural process,

1408
03:54:02.879 --> 03:54:13.760
something that's easy to accomplish. In fact, it's almost the

1409
03:54:14.079 --> 03:54:20.799
sense of relaxing completely happens really when you put no

1410
03:54:20.959 --> 03:54:25.520
effort into it. It's not something that you can really force.

1411
03:54:28.159 --> 03:54:37.520
It's something that happens naturally. And part of the process

1412
03:54:37.920 --> 03:54:49.120
of this recording and others is simply two allow you

1413
03:54:51.520 --> 03:55:02.360
to take advantage of this space, this time, to just

1414
03:55:06.559 --> 03:55:14.120
let go, to just be here, to be in tune

1415
03:55:17.799 --> 03:55:29.920
with how you feel yet with the intention of wanting

1416
03:55:30.200 --> 03:55:42.280
to relax deeply and maybe even to fall asleep, depending

1417
03:55:42.559 --> 03:55:48.760
on what it is that you wish for yourself in

1418
03:55:48.879 --> 03:56:05.040
this moment. As we know, relaxing is the majority of

1419
03:56:05.159 --> 03:56:09.760
the process of falling asleep. The actual falling asleep part

1420
03:56:10.000 --> 03:56:18.200
is the tiny bit at the end. The deeper relaxed

1421
03:56:18.559 --> 03:56:40.680
you become, the easier you find yourself drifting. You can also,

1422
03:56:40.840 --> 03:56:50.920
if you choose, stay focused on my voice and really

1423
03:56:51.440 --> 03:57:20.680
enjoy the process of gradually relaxing each muscle in your

1424
03:57:20.760 --> 03:57:55.319
body effortlessly and just observing the sensation of letting go completely.

1425
03:58:01.360 --> 03:58:05.360
This time, I'm gonna count from six down to one,

1426
03:58:10.239 --> 03:58:19.399
and you can notice your mind calming down more with

1427
03:58:19.799 --> 03:58:33.479
each number that you hear me say, naturally, feeling calm

1428
03:58:34.000 --> 04:01:12.159
and slow and be peaceful. Six, five, four, three, two one,

1429
04:01:33.280 --> 04:01:46.600
being aware how your mind to slow right down, sinking

1430
04:01:49.200 --> 04:02:09.520
deeply into relaxation. And as you focus on your mind,

1431
04:02:09.799 --> 04:02:19.760
you may notice that there are some thoughts still there,

1432
04:02:22.360 --> 04:02:31.879
maybe some stubborn thoughts that for some reason perhaps need

1433
04:02:32.000 --> 04:02:47.159
your attention. That's what you can do is send love

1434
04:02:47.399 --> 04:02:54.239
to those thoughts. Sprinkle those thoughts.

1435
04:02:58.360 --> 04:02:58.920
With love.

1436
04:03:00.639 --> 04:03:04.879
I do petals from a flower. Just sprinkle it over them,

1437
04:03:06.319 --> 04:03:13.479
petals filled with love towards those thoughts to let those

1438
04:03:13.719 --> 04:03:20.120
thoughts know that you're not abandoned in them. You just

1439
04:03:20.600 --> 04:03:30.680
need them. You require them to just calm down, slow down,

1440
04:03:33.000 --> 04:03:47.840
quiet down for now, so as you focus on those

1441
04:03:48.600 --> 04:03:53.520
remaining thoughts. As we count down this time from seven

1442
04:03:54.399 --> 04:04:03.079
down to one. With each number, just imagine sprinkling those

1443
04:04:03.360 --> 04:04:22.799
flower petals of love, kindness, gratitude over those thoughts, which

1444
04:04:22.799 --> 04:04:28.799
will allow them to just melt away and relax deeply.

1445
04:04:32.959 --> 04:04:47.399
With every number, those thoughts will become more and more relaxed,

1446
04:04:53.000 --> 04:07:24.079
starting with number seven, six, five, four, three, one and

1447
04:07:24.360 --> 04:07:41.760
needs you now notice how relaxed you're feeling in your body.

1448
04:07:50.159 --> 04:08:03.360
We're going to focus on your hands, because the more

1449
04:08:03.479 --> 04:08:10.520
relaxed your hands are, the more relaxed your body and

1450
04:08:10.799 --> 04:08:31.479
mind are. And there's you focus on your hands and

1451
04:08:31.639 --> 04:08:41.680
your fingers. There's nothing needed to be done. There's no

1452
04:08:41.959 --> 04:08:46.959
clenching of fists or dents in the fingers or anything

1453
04:08:47.079 --> 04:09:01.000
like that. It's just noticing and focusing on your hands,

1454
04:09:08.000 --> 04:09:30.239
noticing how they feel, because the more relaxed your hands feel,

1455
04:09:33.760 --> 04:09:42.920
the calm your mind feels, and the more comforts you

1456
04:09:43.159 --> 04:09:53.040
feel throughout your body, and you.

1457
04:09:55.719 --> 04:09:58.399
May have.

1458
04:10:02.399 --> 04:10:41.479
Already noticed your mind is starting to dress like sense

1459
04:10:45.520 --> 04:10:54.879
just on your hands and fingers, allowing.

1460
04:10:54.879 --> 04:10:56.239
Them to.

1461
04:10:58.639 --> 04:11:09.600
Experience. It's a real deepening of that relaxation in your

1462
04:11:09.760 --> 04:11:28.200
hands and fingers, more and more relaxed. With each number

1463
04:11:36.120 --> 04:11:48.600
from eight down to one. You can almost feel that

1464
04:11:49.399 --> 04:11:59.239
healing and relaxing energy spreading into your hands and fingers

1465
04:12:02.600 --> 04:12:19.879
becoming ye rore relaxing with each number you hear.

1466
04:12:23.680 --> 04:12:24.799
Going down.

1467
04:12:26.120 --> 04:12:44.840
From eight down to one, drifting, drifting again starting with

1468
04:12:49.440 --> 04:13:35.879
number eighth, seven.

1469
04:13:54.040 --> 04:14:40.200
Six, foy.

1470
04:15:04.479 --> 04:16:51.360
Four three two, just being here now, nothing to think about,

1471
04:16:53.120 --> 04:17:04.559
nothing to do, nothing to say, and everything just feels calmer.

1472
04:17:09.120 --> 04:17:16.600
And this is your natural state of being. This is

1473
04:17:16.879 --> 04:17:23.520
how you just normally feel when you take away all

1474
04:17:23.719 --> 04:17:30.639
that other stuff that we add, you know, things like

1475
04:17:31.079 --> 04:17:47.319
stress and worrying and overthinking, anxiety, tension, just generally thinking

1476
04:17:47.399 --> 04:17:53.000
about stuff. And you take that away, which.

1477
04:17:52.920 --> 04:17:53.479
Is what we do.

1478
04:17:54.280 --> 04:17:55.319
What we do now.

1479
04:18:01.559 --> 04:18:12.799
You're left with a real sense of peacefulness which comes

1480
04:18:12.959 --> 04:18:22.280
to you very quickly because ultimately it's just a feeling,

1481
04:18:26.719 --> 04:18:35.040
a feeling of comfort, almost as if you've gone inside

1482
04:18:35.120 --> 04:18:47.280
yourself and you've found a special place where everything is peaceful,

1483
04:18:50.239 --> 04:18:55.600
a place where you can feel relaxed and your natural

1484
04:18:57.760 --> 04:19:04.120
sense of comfort, a place where you can be you,

1485
04:19:08.840 --> 04:19:15.799
where you can accept yourself for who you are, the

1486
04:19:15.920 --> 04:19:22.440
place where you're not trying to please anybody else ever,

1487
04:19:26.440 --> 04:19:35.000
the place where you can actually not just love yourself,

1488
04:19:35.120 --> 04:19:40.559
but in some ways more importantly, you can like yourself

1489
04:19:43.079 --> 04:20:00.360
appreciate who you are. That sense of gratitude is in

1490
04:20:00.479 --> 04:20:11.000
the air all around you, and that's also a place

1491
04:20:11.200 --> 04:20:21.399
where you can actually feel the healing energy soaking into

1492
04:20:21.479 --> 04:20:38.920
your body. Heaving energy soaking into your body, and the

1493
04:20:39.159 --> 04:20:49.360
healing energy spreads through your veins, traveling to each and

1494
04:20:49.680 --> 04:21:01.559
every single part of your body. Start to realize that

1495
04:21:01.840 --> 04:21:09.159
actually that healing energy it's not just entered into your brain,

1496
04:21:12.000 --> 04:21:21.479
it's become part of your brain, and that spinal fluid

1497
04:21:24.159 --> 04:21:34.920
is now mixed with healing energy, not just allowing you

1498
04:21:35.200 --> 04:21:43.200
to feel so much more relaxed and healthy in this moment,

1499
04:21:47.719 --> 04:21:57.120
but also you start to realize that actually, what's happening

1500
04:21:57.360 --> 04:22:05.879
now with that healing, relaxing energy spreading through your body,

1501
04:22:07.799 --> 04:22:18.639
it's actually changing your life. It's actually changing the way

1502
04:22:18.760 --> 04:22:25.319
you're going to feel, not just now, but tomorrow and

1503
04:22:25.440 --> 04:22:34.360
the next day. As your health improves, not just your

1504
04:22:34.479 --> 04:22:42.239
physical health but your mental health, things that used to

1505
04:22:42.399 --> 04:22:48.520
bother you in the past, for some reason, no longer

1506
04:22:49.840 --> 04:22:57.959
have the effect that they used to because something has changed.

1507
04:22:58.959 --> 04:23:00.239
Deep with the you.

1508
04:23:05.280 --> 04:23:11.680
Maybe things that used to cause you to feel anger

1509
04:23:15.520 --> 04:23:25.639
no longer have that power to control you the way

1510
04:23:25.680 --> 04:23:33.719
they seem to be able to before. As you realize

1511
04:23:34.760 --> 04:23:47.159
that you're the one who decides what affects you, You're

1512
04:23:47.680 --> 04:23:57.559
the one who decides to feel relaxed and calm when

1513
04:23:58.479 --> 04:24:13.399
you choose to enjoy noticing these natural developments of healing

1514
04:24:15.959 --> 04:24:24.559
continuing to grow and improve your life day by day,

1515
04:24:30.440 --> 04:24:38.680
including of course, your ability to relax so much easier

1516
04:24:43.639 --> 04:24:53.200
and sleeping is the most natural thing in the world

1517
04:24:54.680 --> 04:25:03.000
to you, because falling asleep is something that you've done

1518
04:25:06.040 --> 04:25:13.719
so many times in your life, and you know that

1519
04:25:13.920 --> 04:25:19.159
you were born, as we all were, with the ability

1520
04:25:20.799 --> 04:25:31.079
to fall asleep naturally. You were born with that ability

1521
04:25:34.040 --> 04:25:48.319
to just drift off into a deep, healing sleep. Even

1522
04:25:48.399 --> 04:25:53.120
when we're kids, sometimes will fall asleep when we don't

1523
04:25:53.159 --> 04:25:59.120
even want to try and tell us stay awake. Maybe

1524
04:25:59.200 --> 04:26:02.280
it's a birth day in the morning, or it's Christmas

1525
04:26:02.520 --> 04:26:06.319
or holiday or something we look forward to but don't

1526
04:26:06.319 --> 04:26:10.959
want to go to sleep. But the more we want

1527
04:26:11.000 --> 04:26:16.159
to stay awake, the more we just start to drift.

1528
04:26:20.319 --> 04:26:24.319
And the more you fight drifting, the more you try

1529
04:26:24.399 --> 04:26:29.280
to stop yourself and drift in a safe the deeper

1530
04:26:29.479 --> 04:26:41.079
and stronger that drifting becomes. Because we're born not just

1531
04:26:41.280 --> 04:26:47.959
with the need to relax deeply and to naturally fall asleep,

1532
04:26:51.200 --> 04:27:04.520
but it's our birthright, it's part of our DNA. And

1533
04:27:04.760 --> 04:27:10.239
sometimes as we get older in life, perhaps at times

1534
04:27:11.120 --> 04:27:24.120
we have forgotten that relaxing completely is not only a

1535
04:27:24.399 --> 04:27:48.600
wonderfully pleasant experience, it's also really easy. It's very, very

1536
04:27:49.120 --> 04:27:54.600
easy to let go, because that's all it is.

1537
04:27:54.799 --> 04:27:55.280
It is just.

1538
04:27:58.799 --> 04:28:10.239
Deciding to let go. And when you press the play

1539
04:28:10.319 --> 04:28:20.600
button on my recordings, you have given permission for my

1540
04:28:20.840 --> 04:28:28.920
voice to relax you. When you press that play button,

1541
04:28:29.959 --> 04:28:38.360
you have given me permission for my words to effect

1542
04:28:40.879 --> 04:28:52.680
you in a positive, only a positive way, opening up

1543
04:28:57.920 --> 04:29:16.120
your mind to useful and healing suggestions that can have

1544
04:29:20.680 --> 04:29:28.120
such an amazing effect on how you feel right now,

1545
04:29:32.879 --> 04:29:42.719
as well as those changes that continue long after the

1546
04:29:42.840 --> 04:29:53.479
recording ends, those changes within you that continue to flourish

1547
04:29:54.360 --> 04:30:08.920
and grow transfer forming your life in a positive, beautiful way,

1548
04:30:12.000 --> 04:30:19.079
allowing you to move forward in your life in the

1549
04:30:19.200 --> 04:30:36.440
direction that you choose for yourself. And this feeling, this

1550
04:30:36.760 --> 04:30:52.319
feeling that you can experience a safety, comfort, calmness. This

1551
04:30:52.600 --> 04:31:06.239
feels so nice. It's such a healthy place to be,

1552
04:31:14.159 --> 04:31:27.920
and that positivity grows within you each and every day.

1553
04:31:31.000 --> 04:31:40.799
Moving forward, you're going to find that you're more relaxed

1554
04:31:43.159 --> 04:31:55.479
physically and in your mind is more relaxed. And it's

1555
04:31:55.559 --> 04:32:01.079
not that you're thinking slower, it's just that your mind

1556
04:32:01.200 --> 04:32:13.040
would be less flocked up with unnecessary negativity because from

1557
04:32:13.159 --> 04:32:23.440
now on, your mind rejects negativity. From now on, you're

1558
04:32:23.520 --> 04:32:34.319
going to start noticing when negativity arises and you can

1559
04:32:34.520 --> 04:32:48.440
just say stop, stop, and that negativity will turn around

1560
04:32:49.040 --> 04:33:08.439
and leave you alone. Stop and that negativity would disappear.

1561
04:33:16.599 --> 04:33:23.080
And as you notice that you feel way more relaxed

1562
04:33:24.479 --> 04:33:39.840
than you probably expected, you can now congratulate yourself because

1563
04:33:40.040 --> 04:33:46.439
you're the person that has done this. You are the

1564
04:33:46.599 --> 04:33:51.639
one that has opened your mind up to the simple

1565
04:33:51.840 --> 04:33:59.720
facts that you can feel more relaxed than your body

1566
04:34:00.560 --> 04:34:09.720
end in your mind. You've opened your mind up to

1567
04:34:12.080 --> 04:34:18.639
the birthright of being able to just fall asleep easily

1568
04:34:19.720 --> 04:34:33.720
when you choose, And that's a nice feeling. Don't you

1569
04:34:33.799 --> 04:34:45.360
think it feels nice? Doesn't it? To feel calm full,

1570
04:34:45.439 --> 04:34:50.439
that healing energy spreading through your body, in your mind,

1571
04:34:56.919 --> 04:35:05.919
to spend time in there, a special place where negativity

1572
04:35:07.439 --> 04:35:20.319
can no longer enter. Negativity is banned. It's bad, it's

1573
04:35:20.400 --> 04:35:27.560
not allowed. Intrigue doesn't doesn't. This doesn't deserve to be here,

1574
04:35:28.040 --> 04:35:37.040
doesn't belong here. Negativity has no place in your life,

1575
04:35:47.040 --> 04:35:56.520
which makes room for more comfort, more heathing, more relaxation,

1576
04:36:01.400 --> 04:36:30.880
more peace. Feels nice, doesn't it? Just the let go everything.

1577
04:36:44.479 --> 04:36:48.880
I'm gonna count down now from twenty down to one.

1578
04:36:52.319 --> 04:36:58.840
You can continue to relax. If you choose, you can

1579
04:37:02.000 --> 04:37:12.520
drea to sleep with every number you hear me say,

1580
04:37:16.840 --> 04:37:24.200
you can fill twice as relaxed, or if you choose,

1581
04:37:24.360 --> 04:38:32.159
you can fill twice a sleeping now twenty nineteen, eighteen, seventeen, sixteen, fifteen, fourteen,

1582
04:38:41.240 --> 04:39:40.040
thirteen toelve, eleven, ten, nine, eight, seven, six.

1583
04:39:48.200 --> 04:39:55.759
Five war.

1584
04:40:00.040 --> 04:40:34.040
Yeah, this is your time to just take a break,

1585
04:40:38.680 --> 04:40:39.720
your time to.

1586
04:40:42.560 --> 04:40:58.880
Relax, to allow your mind to slow down, to give

1587
04:40:58.959 --> 04:41:00.560
yourself as.

1588
04:41:05.119 --> 04:41:06.840
To take a break.

1589
04:41:11.520 --> 04:41:12.959
From everything.

1590
04:41:17.200 --> 04:41:17.479
And you.

1591
04:41:17.520 --> 04:41:20.360
You're the only person they can.

1592
04:41:20.360 --> 04:41:21.680
Make that decision.

1593
04:41:24.560 --> 04:41:27.279
You're the only person that can actually tell your mind

1594
04:41:32.479 --> 04:41:41.880
just relax, to just.

1595
04:41:45.560 --> 04:41:46.880
Take some time.

1596
04:41:48.560 --> 04:42:00.400
Off so that you can focus on your body, getting

1597
04:42:00.799 --> 04:42:15.119
in touch with how you feel physically. And in the

1598
04:42:15.279 --> 04:42:23.360
process of this buddhy scan where you focus on different

1599
04:42:23.439 --> 04:42:33.319
parts of your body, those parts that you focus on

1600
04:42:34.040 --> 04:42:45.479
and observe, even though you're not purposely requesting for those

1601
04:42:45.639 --> 04:42:48.040
parts of your body to relax.

1602
04:42:49.799 --> 04:42:51.240
It's kind of expected.

1603
04:42:52.840 --> 04:42:58.360
You expect when you listen to my voice to feel

1604
04:42:59.360 --> 04:43:13.119
more words naturally, because when you're listening to me, your

1605
04:43:13.159 --> 04:43:25.400
attention it's focused on my words. And as my words

1606
04:43:26.400 --> 04:43:36.560
by you to focus on those parts of your body,

1607
04:43:40.360 --> 04:44:02.479
your focus increases. It's actually calms your mind. And when

1608
04:44:02.560 --> 04:44:13.759
you wind calms down, your body relaxes.

1609
04:44:21.240 --> 04:44:33.279
And when your putdy calms down, your mind.

1610
04:44:35.000 --> 04:44:50.119
Relaxes. And and though have not really started to focus

1611
04:44:50.599 --> 04:45:02.919
on your body, you can already feel that healing energy

1612
04:45:03.479 --> 04:45:22.119
is spreading through your body, pushing out stress and tension, heathing.

1613
04:45:23.639 --> 04:45:30.360
All the parts of your body, bleeding, the skin, the bones,

1614
04:45:31.959 --> 04:45:38.159
the blood, all of your organs inside your body, all

1615
04:45:38.240 --> 04:45:46.880
of the muscles, all of the fat of everything, every

1616
04:45:47.119 --> 04:45:52.799
hair on your body is filled with the healing energy.

1617
04:46:01.200 --> 04:46:18.279
Your brain feels bad. Healing energy, the feeding of confidence

1618
04:46:19.599 --> 04:46:21.520
of relaxation.

1619
04:46:24.560 --> 04:46:34.599
Increases deeply, increases.

1620
04:46:41.080 --> 04:46:41.720
No way.

1621
04:46:45.360 --> 04:46:46.200
Your mind.

1622
04:46:49.520 --> 04:47:03.040
Stumps to fuel perhaps speak to rousing because it's not needed.

1623
04:47:06.639 --> 04:47:26.360
It may start drive if that's what's needed. So you're

1624
04:47:26.479 --> 04:47:32.159
listening to this, and what you need is deep relaxation.

1625
04:47:32.959 --> 04:47:37.400
That's what you get. You know, what you need is.

1626
04:47:39.159 --> 04:47:46.520
To fall asleep naturally easily. Your mind drifts.

1627
04:47:48.560 --> 04:47:49.840
And spars.

1628
04:47:51.040 --> 04:47:58.319
Or whatever, because why.

1629
04:48:00.880 --> 04:48:05.080
I say that to me wotten on the podcasts that

1630
04:48:05.400 --> 04:48:12.400
listening to me your permission your body, in your mind

1631
04:48:15.479 --> 04:48:25.159
in fact, give the command to your body your mind

1632
04:48:25.520 --> 04:48:36.319
to relax deeply and you you have had to sleep

1633
04:48:37.680 --> 04:48:44.200
if that's what you want wanted.

1634
04:48:51.959 --> 04:48:53.159
And as I put this.

1635
04:48:54.840 --> 04:48:57.919
On the two parts of your body.

1636
04:49:02.560 --> 04:49:03.159
You may.

1637
04:49:04.520 --> 04:49:04.880
Start.

1638
04:49:05.720 --> 04:49:06.400
Just do it.

1639
04:49:10.720 --> 04:49:18.400
And when you come back again talking percusima different parts

1640
04:49:18.479 --> 04:49:29.439
of your body, I'm just sort of drifted.

1641
04:49:32.400 --> 04:49:34.680
You don't realize your drifting.

1642
04:49:36.080 --> 04:49:42.319
Until you stop drifting. You were hurt again to my

1643
04:49:42.560 --> 04:49:50.000
voice ercusin what a different part of your body starts

1644
04:49:50.200 --> 04:50:01.759
to relax in because that drifting basic you already.

1645
04:50:03.560 --> 04:50:04.520
It will sleep, So.

1646
04:50:11.680 --> 04:50:15.080
Wont you do it you won't you dat.

1647
04:50:16.680 --> 04:50:17.560
Won't you do that?

1648
04:50:21.040 --> 04:50:21.319
Bench?

1649
04:50:23.279 --> 04:50:34.240
I dreaded what its in to sleep? That's the last remembers.

1650
04:50:35.799 --> 04:50:36.799
Until you wake up.

1651
04:50:41.599 --> 04:50:42.599
My time.

1652
04:50:44.279 --> 04:50:56.479
Experience the wire. Amount of sleep did you go to?

1653
04:50:56.599 --> 04:51:02.759
Sleepless step food.

1654
04:51:04.880 --> 04:51:05.799
Sun x.

1655
04:51:09.000 --> 04:51:33.520
Spep sleep two sus two lass what body mind.

1656
04:51:38.560 --> 04:51:38.599
You?

1657
04:51:41.479 --> 04:51:54.840
Sprakles sleep deep, so.

1658
04:51:57.639 --> 04:53:06.560
Deep it stop the gup to it seems

1659
04:53:14.159 --> 04:53:14.599
Sets