Aug. 28, 2025

(no music) (5 hours) Goodbye Uncle Sausages | LMBYTS #1424 | Jason Newland | 28th August 2025

(no music) (5 hours) Goodbye Uncle Sausages | LMBYTS #1424 | Jason Newland | 28th August 2025
Apple Podcasts podcast player icon Spotify podcast player icon
Apple Podcasts podcast player icon Spotify podcast player icon
None
WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.520 --> 00:00:08.320
Hello, Hello, it's me again. It's me again. Hello. Hello. Yes,

2
00:00:08.480 --> 00:00:13.759
ities that was the worst jingle. Yeah, it didn't rhyme.

3
00:00:13.880 --> 00:00:17.800
It sounded awful. Well. Actually, personally I thought this sounded

4
00:00:17.879 --> 00:00:26.440
quite nice, melodic but not harmonic. I don't know what

5
00:00:26.480 --> 00:00:34.079
that means. So hello, hello, hello, and welcome to Jasonnewland

6
00:00:34.280 --> 00:00:43.520
dot com. My name is Jason A new Land. Please

7
00:00:44.799 --> 00:00:52.880
only listen, do mirice, it's my cardigan. Only listen when

8
00:00:52.880 --> 00:00:58.119
you can safely close your eyes. A couple of quick

9
00:00:58.200 --> 00:01:04.400
shout outs, one to kill Cleo. You sent me a

10
00:01:04.480 --> 00:01:12.439
message via my website, I think, and somehow the message

11
00:01:12.560 --> 00:01:18.799
has gone missing, and it was to do with I

12
00:01:18.840 --> 00:01:23.959
think you're from China and you're telling me that it's

13
00:01:23.959 --> 00:01:29.719
something that I read it, and I was half asleep

14
00:01:29.760 --> 00:01:31.640
when I read it. I think I was in bed

15
00:01:32.159 --> 00:01:33.799
and I read it, and I thought i'll read that

16
00:01:33.840 --> 00:01:38.519
properly later, because sometimes I've read a message and I

17
00:01:38.560 --> 00:01:42.159
don't get huge amounts of messages. Although you can send

18
00:01:42.200 --> 00:01:44.680
me a personal message via my website if you want,

19
00:01:45.319 --> 00:01:50.319
or on Facebook or whatever, mind it's not a good

20
00:01:50.359 --> 00:01:53.120
advert because I might lose the message. But on this

21
00:01:53.200 --> 00:01:58.079
occasion I lost a message, so I didn't get a

22
00:01:58.120 --> 00:02:02.319
chance to reply, So I apologize to that apologize. I'm

23
00:02:02.359 --> 00:02:12.680
apologizing to you. I apologize, and who I don't know

24
00:02:12.800 --> 00:02:18.240
what else I was going to say. Well, I'll start off,

25
00:02:18.759 --> 00:02:24.759
I went to an uncle auntie uncle sausages, fair well

26
00:02:25.879 --> 00:02:28.960
ceremony today. And don't worry, I'm not going to be

27
00:02:29.159 --> 00:02:31.400
morbid or anything like that. I'm not going to go

28
00:02:31.439 --> 00:02:35.120
through that stuff. But it was kind of weird, you know,

29
00:02:35.560 --> 00:02:40.159
had to be done. It's a standard procedure in our

30
00:02:40.280 --> 00:02:47.120
society here. And then I did do a little video

31
00:02:48.240 --> 00:02:51.800
in a cemetery outside because I got there quite earlier.

32
00:02:51.840 --> 00:02:58.560
I got there. I ordered a taxi yesterday for eight

33
00:02:58.560 --> 00:03:07.560
point thirty this morning, because whether I was going to say,

34
00:03:07.599 --> 00:03:09.759
this show started at nine point thirty, not the show,

35
00:03:09.840 --> 00:03:14.120
but the ceremony started at nine point thirty. It's only

36
00:03:14.159 --> 00:03:19.680
for fifteen minutes, if that ten minutes, fifteen minutes. I

37
00:03:19.680 --> 00:03:25.159
think he's eating one of his treats. He's right off

38
00:03:25.159 --> 00:03:28.639
his food at the moment. But I think that's because

39
00:03:28.639 --> 00:03:33.439
I keep giving him treats. So it's kind of my

40
00:03:33.520 --> 00:03:40.639
own fault. But hey, I just sometimes think that he

41
00:03:40.759 --> 00:03:45.919
deserves treats, you know, I want him to be happy,

42
00:03:46.400 --> 00:03:51.240
and I want him to, you know, do things he

43
00:03:51.360 --> 00:04:00.199
enjoys doing, and he enjoys chomping on his treats to

44
00:04:00.199 --> 00:04:02.560
get a lot of pleasure from that. Now, I'm not

45
00:04:02.560 --> 00:04:05.199
giving him just treats and no food. You know, if

46
00:04:05.240 --> 00:04:07.120
he doesn't eat his food, then I won't give him

47
00:04:07.120 --> 00:04:09.639
any treats until he starts eating his food again. But

48
00:04:09.719 --> 00:04:11.639
he's been off his food for a day or so.

49
00:04:15.360 --> 00:04:18.079
But I have been given some of my food, which

50
00:04:18.160 --> 00:04:22.560
is just as good as the food he eats. So

51
00:04:22.720 --> 00:04:25.399
technically he's not really not been eating. And he's only

52
00:04:25.439 --> 00:04:30.600
a tiny little thing. He's the size of a parrot.

53
00:04:31.120 --> 00:04:34.120
He's not the size of a parrot. In fact, parrot's

54
00:04:34.120 --> 00:04:37.720
probably bigger than him. Parrots are big and the big

55
00:04:37.759 --> 00:04:43.319
old things, right right, that's my impression of a parrot.

56
00:04:45.040 --> 00:04:48.040
I didn't put a lot of effort into that. I'll

57
00:04:48.079 --> 00:04:51.199
admit what it would sound like if I actually did

58
00:04:51.240 --> 00:05:00.959
put some effort in right, Okay, right, right, No, that

59
00:05:01.199 --> 00:05:06.120
wasn't any better. So, yeah, So I ordered a taxi.

60
00:05:06.160 --> 00:05:13.000
This is a secret, a secret. This is it's kind

61
00:05:13.040 --> 00:05:19.079
of something I discovered about myself more recently. If I

62
00:05:19.439 --> 00:05:27.160
order a taxi, the day before. It gets me out

63
00:05:27.199 --> 00:05:31.800
of bed kind of forces me to get out of

64
00:05:31.800 --> 00:05:34.720
bed because if a taxi turns up, I'm going to

65
00:05:34.800 --> 00:05:36.439
have to pay with it. Then they take me where

66
00:05:36.480 --> 00:05:44.079
I'm going or not. So it's just if I'm lying

67
00:05:44.079 --> 00:05:47.759
in bed, which I do sometimes, that's probably the best

68
00:05:47.759 --> 00:05:51.720
place to lie, isn't it. Or lay? What's the difference

69
00:05:51.720 --> 00:05:56.439
between lying and laying because lying can also be telling

70
00:05:56.439 --> 00:06:06.639
fips on it. Laying so getting getting lied to? So

71
00:06:06.720 --> 00:06:12.160
getting lied that's being yeah, someone lying to you. But

72
00:06:12.160 --> 00:06:14.720
there's no you don't get laid A wait a minute,

73
00:06:15.639 --> 00:06:20.319
get okay. But anyway, I was once something in the morning.

74
00:06:21.959 --> 00:06:24.879
If I not have to be somewhere, it doesn't matter

75
00:06:24.879 --> 00:06:29.759
what it is, where it is, what it's for. For

76
00:06:29.839 --> 00:06:33.759
some reason, I I struggle a little bit getting out

77
00:06:33.759 --> 00:06:38.160
of bed, which is part of the reason why I

78
00:06:38.360 --> 00:06:44.439
really really try not to make appointments, including just meeting

79
00:06:44.519 --> 00:06:48.639
up with people, because once I make an appointment, I start,

80
00:06:49.000 --> 00:06:51.079
for some reason, to be a bit fretty about it,

81
00:06:51.240 --> 00:06:57.040
be to just start thinking about it, and I don't

82
00:06:57.079 --> 00:07:06.399
want to that's my own issue. And of course you

83
00:07:06.439 --> 00:07:08.040
know that I was that I didn't want to go

84
00:07:08.120 --> 00:07:11.079
to this thing. I don't like them or know what

85
00:07:11.240 --> 00:07:15.519
it likes them. Today, No one like wakes up or

86
00:07:15.560 --> 00:07:19.040
a looked at the weekend of their diary and thinks, oh,

87
00:07:19.439 --> 00:07:21.600
what have I got any of them things this month?

88
00:07:21.720 --> 00:07:24.160
Oh yeah, I've got one, got one in two weeks.

89
00:07:24.240 --> 00:07:24.439
Yeah.

90
00:07:25.000 --> 00:07:31.120
No, you know, the goodbye ceremonies are not something that

91
00:07:31.680 --> 00:07:35.759
anyone wants to really go to, but it's it's important.

92
00:07:35.800 --> 00:07:41.439
I guess I think it's fairly important. So anyway, I

93
00:07:41.560 --> 00:07:46.879
got up, got up this morning. I set my alarm

94
00:07:48.199 --> 00:07:55.079
for six o'clock. I went to bed about nine o'clock.

95
00:07:57.600 --> 00:08:01.480
So I wanted to make sure that I was. You know,

96
00:08:02.199 --> 00:08:05.879
normally I don't sleep for like twelve thirteen hours, but

97
00:08:05.920 --> 00:08:07.439
this would have been one of the nights where I

98
00:08:07.480 --> 00:08:11.600
probably would, you know, I'd wake up at half ten

99
00:08:11.680 --> 00:08:16.240
in the morning and feel so refreshed, but then also think, oh, no,

100
00:08:17.560 --> 00:08:24.920
I've missed. I've missed this event, which is important. So

101
00:08:25.240 --> 00:08:28.040
I wasn't going to allow that to happen. So I

102
00:08:28.079 --> 00:08:31.839
set my alarm on my phone. I don't have a clock.

103
00:08:33.440 --> 00:08:35.440
I don't have one clock. I don't have a watch

104
00:08:35.480 --> 00:08:38.399
that I wear. I do have two watches that I

105
00:08:38.440 --> 00:08:43.960
don't wear, but there were gifts, so I've kept them.

106
00:08:44.200 --> 00:08:46.960
I don't ever, I don't have. I don't have a

107
00:08:47.039 --> 00:08:54.360
clock on the wall. I don't have. I think he

108
00:08:54.440 --> 00:08:59.519
made a bit more noise. Please thanks. I don't have

109
00:09:00.320 --> 00:09:04.159
a digital clock, you know, like in the old days.

110
00:09:04.159 --> 00:09:06.919
I don't know if they still make them. I sid

111
00:09:06.960 --> 00:09:10.039
one of them. I tell you how. This is how

112
00:09:10.080 --> 00:09:13.559
old I am, all right. I had a digital clock

113
00:09:14.240 --> 00:09:17.559
that had pieces of card that used to flip over.

114
00:09:18.240 --> 00:09:21.039
No lights or maybe a background light, but a little

115
00:09:21.080 --> 00:09:24.480
piece of card that flipped over to change the time

116
00:09:25.240 --> 00:09:32.799
from like two fifty nine till three. It's weird, I'm

117
00:09:32.840 --> 00:09:35.440
explaining it, but just like on a spiral, I guess.

118
00:09:36.559 --> 00:09:47.679
And yeah, that's going back a few years. I can't

119
00:09:47.720 --> 00:09:50.360
I'm trying to think when was the last time I

120
00:09:50.679 --> 00:09:56.320
had an alarm like a digital clock. So I quite

121
00:09:56.399 --> 00:09:58.600
liked the radio ones, so the ones that had a

122
00:09:58.679 --> 00:10:02.039
radio one, and I definitely had one when I was

123
00:10:02.080 --> 00:10:12.240
a kid, when I was fourteen fifteen, that's for definite.

124
00:10:13.480 --> 00:10:16.039
I probably had one earlier than that as well, but

125
00:10:16.039 --> 00:10:20.360
I definitely had one then because I used to have

126
00:10:20.480 --> 00:10:24.440
paper rounds and I also worked in a bakery.

127
00:10:25.440 --> 00:10:25.600
Sort.

128
00:10:25.639 --> 00:10:29.000
I've had early starts. There's no way to got up

129
00:10:29.039 --> 00:10:34.039
without that, without the alarm. And I remember, actually this

130
00:10:34.360 --> 00:10:37.600
was or even going to school, to be fair, even

131
00:10:37.679 --> 00:10:40.960
without the alarm, without even if I didn't have to

132
00:10:40.960 --> 00:10:45.519
get up early and just gap at normal time, let's

133
00:10:45.559 --> 00:10:49.840
say seven or seven thirty or whatever, to get to

134
00:10:49.879 --> 00:10:55.000
be at school for court to nine, I would still

135
00:10:55.039 --> 00:10:58.480
need my alarm. You know. When I when I was

136
00:10:58.600 --> 00:11:01.919
very little, i'd just get woken up. But this was

137
00:11:01.960 --> 00:11:04.200
the point where I just kind of got up on

138
00:11:04.240 --> 00:11:08.919
my own. There comes a time in every teenager's life

139
00:11:08.919 --> 00:11:10.759
when they don't want anyone walking in the first thing

140
00:11:10.759 --> 00:11:21.279
in the morning. It's yeah, no one likes being called

141
00:11:21.960 --> 00:11:26.519
tent boy, do they, especially by the parents. So anyway,

142
00:11:26.720 --> 00:11:33.639
I went to went to and oh, I remember once right,

143
00:11:36.279 --> 00:11:38.480
I woke up to this song. This was when I

144
00:11:38.519 --> 00:11:43.039
was at school, probably about eighty three, nineteen eighty three

145
00:11:43.159 --> 00:11:46.240
or nineteen eighty four, one of them, but I'd say

146
00:11:46.279 --> 00:11:51.360
probably about nineteen eighty four, maybe eighty five, but I'm

147
00:11:51.399 --> 00:11:55.240
going to say eighty four as a guess. Everything's a guess, really,

148
00:11:55.360 --> 00:12:06.159
especially when it comes to memory. Men. And I woke

149
00:12:06.279 --> 00:12:11.120
up to this song that blew me away, like because

150
00:12:11.440 --> 00:12:14.639
it would be a radio station on. I don't know

151
00:12:14.639 --> 00:12:17.960
what it was. It was Radio one or who knows,

152
00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:21.039
so I can't remember, maybe just the local radio station.

153
00:12:21.639 --> 00:12:26.399
But I woke up to this song, and for some reason,

154
00:12:27.080 --> 00:12:30.159
for about a week, the same song was being played

155
00:12:30.200 --> 00:12:33.320
every time I woke up, a bit like Groundhog Day,

156
00:12:34.840 --> 00:12:41.799
which in some ways my whole was you could say

157
00:12:41.799 --> 00:12:43.679
my whole life is in it in some ways. But

158
00:12:44.120 --> 00:12:46.000
at school it did seem a little bit like that.

159
00:12:46.039 --> 00:12:49.480
Every day was like the same getting up the blahber,

160
00:12:50.080 --> 00:12:54.120
doing this, doing that, same kind of routine. But it

161
00:12:54.200 --> 00:12:58.200
was the same song. I didn't think that it was

162
00:12:58.240 --> 00:13:03.240
the same day, you know. I didn't like, oh no,

163
00:13:03.759 --> 00:13:07.039
I'm stuck in a time loop or I didn't have

164
00:13:07.159 --> 00:13:15.320
that issue. I wasn't worried about that. But I fell

165
00:13:15.360 --> 00:13:22.639
in love with this song and the song was dead

166
00:13:22.759 --> 00:13:30.120
ringer for love, meet Loaf and share since I worry

167
00:13:30.120 --> 00:13:31.679
about my joy?

168
00:13:33.200 --> 00:13:40.320
Do do do do Do Do Do Do Do Do

169
00:13:38.799 --> 00:13:47.759
Do Do do do baby baby er do do do

170
00:13:47.759 --> 00:13:48.279
you know what?

171
00:13:48.879 --> 00:13:55.480
I never ever, I've never got done for copywriting, like

172
00:13:55.960 --> 00:13:59.559
for having a copyright music in any of these recordings,

173
00:13:59.600 --> 00:14:03.919
like when it's on YouTube, which means that none of

174
00:14:03.960 --> 00:14:08.840
my songs that I do ever sound anything even similar

175
00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:13.240
to the original song. I could look, I could sing

176
00:14:13.279 --> 00:14:17.360
you the whole a whole song, Buddy Holly song that

177
00:14:17.399 --> 00:14:20.639
I'm memorized. I don't know why I just did. It's

178
00:14:20.679 --> 00:14:25.799
a new thing I've been doing, and no one didn't

179
00:14:25.919 --> 00:14:29.399
know what I was like, Ah, it's nice. What was it? Well,

180
00:14:29.399 --> 00:14:31.840
they might not say that was nice, but I imagine

181
00:14:31.919 --> 00:14:35.480
people are saying nice things. If you've got to imagine

182
00:14:35.480 --> 00:14:37.120
people are saying things, you might as well why not

183
00:14:37.200 --> 00:14:41.919
imagine them saying nice things. You know, it's the same things.

184
00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:44.720
Like if I'm going to imagine people talking about me,

185
00:14:45.960 --> 00:14:51.440
then let them say nice things about me. It's a

186
00:14:51.440 --> 00:14:58.320
different way to look at things. People are planning. Maybe

187
00:14:58.320 --> 00:15:07.159
they're planning to give me a surprise birthday party. Yeah, anyway,

188
00:15:07.200 --> 00:15:11.480
dead Ring for Love. I just couldn't get enough of it.

189
00:15:13.039 --> 00:15:16.840
I had not seen the video at this point, so

190
00:15:17.120 --> 00:15:19.639
this was like, Okay, I say all week, this was

191
00:15:19.679 --> 00:15:23.840
the Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday morning. I'm partially making this

192
00:15:23.919 --> 00:15:26.440
up as I always do, but you know, it was

193
00:15:26.600 --> 00:15:30.159
like the first four days of the week at school,

194
00:15:31.519 --> 00:15:35.000
Thursday evening we had Top of the Pops, which was

195
00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:39.200
on I do believe seven thirty seven or seven thirty

196
00:15:40.039 --> 00:15:43.879
and that was the one time of the week. It

197
00:15:43.919 --> 00:15:50.279
was one of the most important programs for you know,

198
00:15:50.440 --> 00:15:54.399
young people or anyone that liked music. Really, I mean

199
00:15:54.440 --> 00:15:57.120
I watched Top of the Pops from being a little

200
00:15:57.240 --> 00:16:00.960
kid all the way till when they stopped showing it.

201
00:16:02.919 --> 00:16:06.039
You know, I was because it was a good opportunity

202
00:16:06.080 --> 00:16:10.039
to see who was in the charts, what was relevant,

203
00:16:10.639 --> 00:16:15.600
what people were listening to, up to date music, which

204
00:16:15.679 --> 00:16:18.720
is a phrase I don't before I'd say out loud,

205
00:16:20.519 --> 00:16:24.759
I'm way out of I'm out of it completely now

206
00:16:24.799 --> 00:16:29.559
when it comes to music. The thing is, I liked

207
00:16:29.639 --> 00:16:34.919
music in the two thousand's twenty tens, just you know,

208
00:16:34.960 --> 00:16:37.799
I liked a lot of new music that was out

209
00:16:39.039 --> 00:16:43.960
sort of ten years before I moved here. I was

210
00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:47.759
watching video channels of music, and I was up to

211
00:16:47.840 --> 00:16:52.039
date with all of the latest music. It didn't stop

212
00:16:52.080 --> 00:16:56.200
me still loving the music that I loved before. It didn't.

213
00:16:56.440 --> 00:17:00.000
You know, I didn't like one new song I loved,

214
00:17:00.279 --> 00:17:03.399
didn't knock out another song from the past. It didn't

215
00:17:03.480 --> 00:17:14.960
erase that song you know. But more recent years, i've

216
00:17:15.119 --> 00:17:19.240
kind of, yeah, I have tried. I'm going to try again.

217
00:17:19.480 --> 00:17:21.640
I think it's easier with the videos than it is

218
00:17:21.720 --> 00:17:30.240
listening by hearing a song for the first time. I

219
00:17:30.279 --> 00:17:35.799
think it's more interesting to see the video because there's

220
00:17:35.839 --> 00:17:42.680
more going on. I think I know what I'm talking about.

221
00:17:43.119 --> 00:17:45.000
I think, yeah, I think it is. It just makes

222
00:17:45.039 --> 00:17:49.480
a bit more. But then there's that repetition, the repetition

223
00:17:49.599 --> 00:17:53.519
of hearing the same song over and over again, like

224
00:17:53.680 --> 00:17:59.839
on a radio. I remember, I don't know if I

225
00:17:59.920 --> 00:18:02.400
was listen did I hear this on the radio or

226
00:18:02.920 --> 00:18:05.759
I don't know, but it was I didn't like it,

227
00:18:06.359 --> 00:18:13.279
and it was Beyonce Drunken Love and I heard that,

228
00:18:16.759 --> 00:18:18.720
and I'm thinking, if I heard that on the radio,

229
00:18:21.200 --> 00:18:23.759
how did I hear it on the radio? Because I

230
00:18:23.799 --> 00:18:27.519
don't even listen to the radio, so I can't remember,

231
00:18:27.960 --> 00:18:30.759
you know, because a few years ago, unless it was

232
00:18:30.920 --> 00:18:35.480
just a music video thing that I was watching a

233
00:18:35.640 --> 00:18:43.279
music video channel and I genuinely thought it was the

234
00:18:43.519 --> 00:18:51.279
biggest pile. I just didn't The video is good, but

235
00:18:51.359 --> 00:18:54.200
I did not like the song. I thought, this is

236
00:18:54.240 --> 00:19:00.839
not even cohesive, it's all off killer it's this, it's

237
00:19:01.079 --> 00:19:08.759
not it's not a song, it's not melodic. It's really

238
00:19:08.839 --> 00:19:15.000
just like what was going on here? And then after

239
00:19:15.079 --> 00:19:17.000
hearing it a few times, I really liked it.

240
00:19:19.319 --> 00:19:26.960
Urban missings and and then missing.

241
00:19:27.519 --> 00:19:33.440
I mean, I do I've mentioned this before, but Beyonce,

242
00:19:35.160 --> 00:19:45.200
I mean, she is what a phenomenal voice. I think

243
00:19:45.240 --> 00:19:49.480
the thing is with her is she could have just

244
00:19:49.559 --> 00:19:57.480
as easily gone on and done kind of the same

245
00:19:57.599 --> 00:20:03.359
type of music or the same kind of I don't

246
00:20:03.400 --> 00:20:05.799
know what the correct term is, but it's like Mariah

247
00:20:05.920 --> 00:20:13.319
Carey or Whitney Houston or Celine Dion or that kind

248
00:20:13.359 --> 00:20:20.160
of like Balladish because of her voice, how good her

249
00:20:20.240 --> 00:20:25.480
voice is, And she would have been successful whatever she did.

250
00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:28.279
I think she'd have been successful because she's got such

251
00:20:28.279 --> 00:20:33.960
a great voice. But she chose to go in a

252
00:20:33.920 --> 00:20:41.079
completely different way. And I mean, as far as I

253
00:20:41.119 --> 00:20:43.079
don't know, she writes all the songs or she co

254
00:20:43.160 --> 00:20:51.200
writes her songs, but yeah, she's so many This wasn't

255
00:20:51.240 --> 00:20:54.960
supposed to be about Beyonce, But what's that God I

256
00:20:55.079 --> 00:20:59.799
do with her? Uncle Banana's not uncle bananas, uncle sausages. Sorry,

257
00:20:59.799 --> 00:21:03.960
that's what one of the neighbors called him uncle Bananas

258
00:21:04.119 --> 00:21:11.279
banana man, which one of the neighbors kids saw him

259
00:21:11.759 --> 00:21:14.799
on that day before he went into hospital, and she

260
00:21:14.920 --> 00:21:17.960
started calling a banana man from then on. But you know,

261
00:21:18.079 --> 00:21:25.240
she's like nine years old, so I can't. It's this.

262
00:21:25.880 --> 00:21:28.559
Kids are innocent and they kind of, you know, in

263
00:21:28.599 --> 00:21:31.240
that way. She didn't. She just found it funny that

264
00:21:31.279 --> 00:21:35.519
he was. Not funny that he was because no one

265
00:21:35.599 --> 00:21:37.519
knew he was little bit because he was a different color.

266
00:21:37.559 --> 00:21:41.799
He was yellow, and she thought it was like he'd

267
00:21:41.839 --> 00:21:55.640
been eating too many bananas or something like that. Anyway,

268
00:21:56.480 --> 00:22:00.880
it was a lovely picture of him, uh in thing

269
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:05.119
today and he had this is holding umbrella. And it's

270
00:22:05.160 --> 00:22:07.240
really weird because you know, when you meet someone when

271
00:22:07.240 --> 00:22:11.759
they're is it okay to say elderly someone when they're

272
00:22:11.799 --> 00:22:15.640
seventy eight, Sebastian calls me elderly. Ten years ago he

273
00:22:15.720 --> 00:22:20.200
was calleding me elderly. But if you don't know Sebastian

274
00:22:20.319 --> 00:22:23.480
is he's my arch enemy. He's listening to this right

275
00:22:23.480 --> 00:22:30.559
now that this will make him smile. Blimey, finny. That

276
00:22:30.680 --> 00:22:35.799
was really loud. Even I heard it. Even Uncle Sausages

277
00:22:35.839 --> 00:22:39.160
heard it. Let's stop it. And so yeah, I was,

278
00:22:40.119 --> 00:22:41.119
you know, it's loud.

279
00:22:44.480 --> 00:23:04.559
Wow, that that is really really noisy, was I saying, Beyonce.

280
00:23:06.559 --> 00:23:12.839
It was weird because she's so glamorous. She did an

281
00:23:12.880 --> 00:23:15.720
award show and I think she was singing on an

282
00:23:15.720 --> 00:23:20.079
award show, a big spectacular maybe it was the Oscars

283
00:23:20.200 --> 00:23:25.880
or one of those kind of places, and she's stared

284
00:23:25.960 --> 00:23:31.039
with this stunning dress. Not that I really appreciate stunning dresses,

285
00:23:31.079 --> 00:23:35.359
but it was even I could see it was. It

286
00:23:35.440 --> 00:23:40.400
was clearly a lot of work put into getting dressed up,

287
00:23:42.640 --> 00:23:48.799
playing dress up. So she looked probably like a billion

288
00:23:48.839 --> 00:23:51.000
dollars because she is a billion dollar are and she

289
00:23:51.920 --> 00:23:55.200
but she yeah, she looked. Imagine she took hours and

290
00:23:55.279 --> 00:24:00.480
hours and hours and hours and hours getting ready for thatformance.

291
00:24:00.960 --> 00:24:05.000
Just with the clothes. He probably took a whole team

292
00:24:05.079 --> 00:24:08.880
of people to put that together, because it was just

293
00:24:09.799 --> 00:24:20.079
it's quite outrageously fab Anyway, she's singing. She comes out singing,

294
00:24:20.119 --> 00:24:23.400
and all the audience are loving it, and the you know,

295
00:24:23.519 --> 00:24:28.359
being watched by millions, maybe billions of people around the world,

296
00:24:28.440 --> 00:24:33.920
this live event, and she's singing a song. Then it's

297
00:24:33.920 --> 00:24:37.160
time for her husband to come on and accompany her.

298
00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:43.039
With one of her songs, jay Z and he pops

299
00:24:43.079 --> 00:24:45.759
on and he eats ort of walks on in these

300
00:24:50.559 --> 00:24:52.720
I don't know what he was wearing. There were kind

301
00:24:52.720 --> 00:24:56.640
of like tracksuit bottoms that were half hanging down his bum,

302
00:24:57.200 --> 00:25:05.319
and I don't know, he kind of she looked like

303
00:25:05.440 --> 00:25:12.240
she was there. She looked like she was there to

304
00:25:13.240 --> 00:25:18.839
basically be crowned a princess, like it was a royal wedding.

305
00:25:20.599 --> 00:25:24.839
He looked like he'd lost his mop. He's like where

306
00:25:25.039 --> 00:25:28.440
I left it somewhere, you know. It's it's just the

307
00:25:28.440 --> 00:25:34.440
way he was dressed on me. Not I dress bad,

308
00:25:34.599 --> 00:25:40.759
but he probably everything he was wearing was probably one

309
00:25:41.079 --> 00:25:44.519
of his socks, probably costs more than my entire life's earnings.

310
00:25:44.599 --> 00:25:52.519
But I just did the biggest knees in the world

311
00:25:52.640 --> 00:25:54.759
just then. Even then, he stopped and looked at me

312
00:25:55.000 --> 00:25:59.880
like normally he'll have a look and he'll carry on,

313
00:26:00.079 --> 00:26:03.279
but this time he actually said, are you okay? You're right?

314
00:26:03.759 --> 00:26:12.359
Do you need help? And I don't know why, but

315
00:26:12.440 --> 00:26:16.240
it made me laugh. When I saw him come on stage,

316
00:26:16.279 --> 00:26:20.400
he hopped on stage and it was like grabbing his crotch,

317
00:26:20.440 --> 00:26:26.920
and I was ah, boat the Buddha Bet and I

318
00:26:27.039 --> 00:26:33.319
beat the Buddha Birth and I'm thinking, oh, I know,

319
00:26:34.839 --> 00:26:42.039
because he's about seventy now, and I don't know. See

320
00:26:42.119 --> 00:26:46.480
I'm I used to love Eminem and Minimi and Minimum

321
00:26:48.119 --> 00:26:50.400
back in the late nineties. You know, when he was

322
00:26:52.079 --> 00:26:56.240
I would argue, Sayso's peak was stand and you know

323
00:26:56.359 --> 00:27:03.839
that album. Really liked that album a lot. I'm listening

324
00:27:03.880 --> 00:27:10.960
to one hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of times. But

325
00:27:11.119 --> 00:27:18.400
he was in his twenties and he was dressing like that.

326
00:27:18.759 --> 00:27:21.759
It's now in his fifties and he's still dressing like that,

327
00:27:23.279 --> 00:27:28.680
and I don't know's it. He had a song recently

328
00:27:28.839 --> 00:27:34.680
and it was about basically getting slim Shady back or

329
00:27:34.720 --> 00:27:36.759
something like in this light video where he's got him

330
00:27:36.839 --> 00:27:42.000
and him when he was back in his twenties competing

331
00:27:42.039 --> 00:27:47.680
against each other or something, and it's I mean, there's

332
00:27:47.720 --> 00:27:49.799
no rule. It was like, okay, with someone in their

333
00:27:49.839 --> 00:27:52.599
fifties can't good. Clearly, I'm an example of someone in

334
00:27:52.680 --> 00:27:57.559
their fifties that are pretty amazing, but dumb, dumb, dumb,

335
00:28:00.119 --> 00:28:04.440
you can't see me if it's kind of like if

336
00:28:04.480 --> 00:28:11.200
I was, yeah, I think this is the thing I've got.

337
00:28:11.359 --> 00:28:16.119
There's an old saying, isn't it. You know someone say, oh,

338
00:28:16.160 --> 00:28:18.720
you've got a voice for radio. Well, I've got a

339
00:28:18.759 --> 00:28:23.680
face for radio. It's you know, it's the best place.

340
00:28:24.160 --> 00:28:27.519
Although this isn't radio, but this is the modern day

341
00:28:27.640 --> 00:28:30.200
version of radio in a way, isn't it. It's just

342
00:28:30.400 --> 00:28:33.599
you choose your own show. So instead of listening to

343
00:28:33.640 --> 00:28:38.960
me at nine o'clock in the evening on a Friday

344
00:28:39.079 --> 00:28:47.440
night or whatever, you can listen to me whenever you want. Yeah,

345
00:28:47.920 --> 00:28:54.440
and there's no news bulletins, there's no music there. You know,

346
00:28:54.680 --> 00:28:59.960
it's better in some ways, but also a lot worse

347
00:29:00.039 --> 00:29:07.119
in other ways. Maybe maybe anyway, I think jay Z

348
00:29:07.319 --> 00:29:09.920
was all right. I like some of his stuff. The

349
00:29:09.960 --> 00:29:15.920
stuff he did with Eminem was good, but.

350
00:29:15.880 --> 00:29:16.279
It just.

351
00:29:18.559 --> 00:29:24.440
I don't know. I think it's something about it would

352
00:29:24.480 --> 00:29:29.279
be because I think when Eminem is like in his seventies,

353
00:29:33.119 --> 00:29:38.119
is he still going to be is he still going

354
00:29:38.160 --> 00:29:39.799
to be doing this? He's still going to be dyeing

355
00:29:39.839 --> 00:29:44.160
his hair black, which he does now? And is he

356
00:29:44.559 --> 00:29:46.960
and you can see as black and his beards black

357
00:29:47.119 --> 00:29:53.359
dyed because you know he ain't. You just can tell.

358
00:29:54.240 --> 00:29:57.680
It's weird the amount of people I see who have

359
00:29:57.839 --> 00:30:07.559
got clearly jet black dyed beards. And you know how

360
00:30:07.559 --> 00:30:15.359
you can tell because the beards are jet black. That's

361
00:30:15.359 --> 00:30:20.839
how you can tell. Because generally anyone over the age

362
00:30:20.880 --> 00:30:25.480
of thirty is going to have the odd gray I

363
00:30:25.519 --> 00:30:30.200
know some people do like, you know, tweeze them out.

364
00:30:30.880 --> 00:30:34.519
I used to do that. I did. It's amazing. I

365
00:30:34.599 --> 00:30:36.119
used to do that at the front of my hair.

366
00:30:36.680 --> 00:30:39.319
And someone said to me, you shouldn't do that. You've

367
00:30:39.319 --> 00:30:42.519
only got a few gray hairs. Don't tweeze them out

368
00:30:42.519 --> 00:30:45.119
at the front of your hair or the back of

369
00:30:45.160 --> 00:30:49.920
your head because that part start to receive or go bald.

370
00:30:50.079 --> 00:30:58.960
And I laughed at them. Who's laughing now? Not me? No,

371
00:30:59.000 --> 00:31:02.279
I didn't, would you? Why would I? Why would I

372
00:31:02.319 --> 00:31:04.880
tweeze the hairs in the back of my head? I

373
00:31:04.920 --> 00:31:12.160
can't see them. It's really weird. Why would that part?

374
00:31:13.480 --> 00:31:15.680
Because that's a part on the baby's head, isn't it.

375
00:31:15.720 --> 00:31:19.559
That's the fragile part for the first few weeks or whatever.

376
00:31:21.279 --> 00:31:29.519
So why why why would that part go bored anyone?

377
00:31:32.359 --> 00:31:40.599
I reckon, I reckon. I'll probably I've still had hair

378
00:31:40.640 --> 00:31:44.720
in ten years, I do believe, And I don't mean just

379
00:31:44.799 --> 00:31:50.400
at the sights because I don't. I kin'd of. I

380
00:31:50.440 --> 00:31:53.480
don't see the point in doing that myself personally, just

381
00:31:53.519 --> 00:31:56.920
for me. If I'm going to be bored up as well,

382
00:31:57.039 --> 00:32:00.319
just be bored if I'm going to shave my head head.

383
00:32:01.359 --> 00:32:07.079
But then I'm starting to feel more attached to my

384
00:32:07.200 --> 00:32:11.119
hair now that it's going. Now it's leaving me. It's

385
00:32:11.160 --> 00:32:15.079
like at the end of a bad relationship. And I'm

386
00:32:15.119 --> 00:32:18.599
not begging, Oh please, I can change, don't leave me.

387
00:32:18.680 --> 00:32:23.440
I can change. I can start changing my underpants more

388
00:32:23.440 --> 00:32:28.000
than once a month. I can change. You know. It's like,

389
00:32:28.119 --> 00:32:30.680
but the hairs having none of it. No, we're leaving,

390
00:32:32.359 --> 00:32:36.559
but they don't. But it's not a quick like a

391
00:32:36.640 --> 00:32:38.960
quick leave, a quick gone. It's like we're going to

392
00:32:39.039 --> 00:32:41.480
leave you, but we're going to spend years doing it.

393
00:32:42.519 --> 00:32:48.400
Oh thanks. I've never really had any of those moments

394
00:32:49.079 --> 00:32:51.880
where I've been washing my hair and like a big

395
00:32:52.000 --> 00:32:59.960
amount comes out, thankfully. It's just it's like gradual, very gradual.

396
00:33:01.240 --> 00:33:03.359
I mean, I know I've had friends that had our

397
00:33:03.480 --> 00:33:08.480
alopecia where just like clumps of coming out. It's like

398
00:33:09.319 --> 00:33:14.920
they didn't know what the heck was going on. And yeah,

399
00:33:14.960 --> 00:33:18.960
I had a friend a year long time ago he

400
00:33:19.000 --> 00:33:28.640
had alopecia, and back then they didn't know what was

401
00:33:28.640 --> 00:33:31.119
causing it. I mean, I'm sure there's there's not like

402
00:33:31.160 --> 00:33:33.319
a specific only one thing that can cause it. But

403
00:33:33.920 --> 00:33:40.359
I know stress, and I know someone who's when he

404
00:33:40.640 --> 00:33:48.119
changes his lifestyle, the alopecia stops. Right, That's all I'm

405
00:33:48.119 --> 00:33:50.799
going to go into that. But he has a certain lifestyle.

406
00:33:50.880 --> 00:33:53.160
When he changes that lifestyle, when he stops doing what

407
00:33:53.200 --> 00:34:01.400
he's doing, is alopecia clears up. And some people, if

408
00:34:01.519 --> 00:34:05.119
they get out of the stressful situation, that can also help.

409
00:34:05.920 --> 00:34:10.360
But then there's other people that I think perhaps there's

410
00:34:10.440 --> 00:34:19.440
no reason for it, there's no logical explanation. I wonder,

411
00:34:19.440 --> 00:34:21.800
if I've got alopecia in the top of my head,

412
00:34:22.800 --> 00:34:25.880
maybe that's just a temporary board spot and it's going

413
00:34:25.920 --> 00:34:37.360
to grow back. Ah, I'm clutching it something. Oh guess

414
00:34:37.360 --> 00:34:43.639
what in my local fields. Then he got me walking.

415
00:34:44.920 --> 00:34:47.199
He basically went to the end of the road because

416
00:34:47.199 --> 00:34:49.440
I took him out. I took him out this morning

417
00:34:49.559 --> 00:34:58.920
before going to Uncle's Sausages Farewell, and so that was

418
00:34:58.920 --> 00:35:05.639
about six o'clock morning, and then I had to really

419
00:35:06.079 --> 00:35:07.480
I didn't want to get ready, he didn't want to

420
00:35:07.519 --> 00:35:10.000
go out, but I knew I had to have this

421
00:35:10.079 --> 00:35:14.079
is afterwards. So I'm out in the park at six,

422
00:35:14.559 --> 00:35:17.559
come back. It's light lights still at six in the morning,

423
00:35:17.559 --> 00:35:26.360
which is good. And then about half past seven, I

424
00:35:26.400 --> 00:35:29.400
go and have a shower. And as soon as I

425
00:35:29.480 --> 00:35:32.559
get up and go in the bathroom and start having

426
00:35:32.559 --> 00:35:38.559
a shower, Vinnie is very attentive to what I'm doing.

427
00:35:41.440 --> 00:35:43.679
He's watching me. I can't see him watching me because

428
00:35:43.679 --> 00:35:46.000
I'm in the shower and there's two doors closed, but

429
00:35:46.639 --> 00:35:51.760
I know he's listening. I mean, technically I can't know

430
00:35:51.880 --> 00:35:55.480
that he's listening, but just because I know him so well,

431
00:35:55.639 --> 00:36:00.639
he is. He seems to know when I'm going out,

432
00:36:00.920 --> 00:36:05.559
when I'm getting ned to leave him. And no, it's

433
00:36:05.599 --> 00:36:07.519
not the only time. It's not the only time I

434
00:36:07.559 --> 00:36:11.639
have a shower is when I leave him. Is that

435
00:36:11.679 --> 00:36:16.119
literally would be five four four, three times a year,

436
00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:21.039
So I'm not not quite that bad, but it's been

437
00:36:21.119 --> 00:36:27.239
more recently, more often recently because of Uncle Sausages. Last week,

438
00:36:27.280 --> 00:36:33.239
I had to go to to leave him Monday because

439
00:36:33.280 --> 00:36:37.199
I had a doctor's appointment. I still not received the

440
00:36:37.239 --> 00:36:47.480
results of the blood test and then on previous to that.

441
00:36:47.719 --> 00:36:55.559
The last time I went out was beginning of August.

442
00:36:56.360 --> 00:36:59.400
So yes, it's been a while. But he started to

443
00:36:59.400 --> 00:37:01.800
get used to me going out every day or every

444
00:37:01.960 --> 00:37:06.519
every other day, and he didn't, you know, he kind

445
00:37:06.519 --> 00:37:08.039
of got got used to it to the point where

446
00:37:08.039 --> 00:37:11.480
he didn't like it. Still caused a bit of a fuss,

447
00:37:13.079 --> 00:37:17.239
but he seemed to be accepted it. But now he's

448
00:37:17.280 --> 00:37:20.119
gone back to his old ways where he will not

449
00:37:21.000 --> 00:37:23.760
he would not put up with it, not even for

450
00:37:23.800 --> 00:37:26.880
me just to go and put a rubbish bag into

451
00:37:26.960 --> 00:37:33.760
the rubbish bin downstairs. I'm literally coming straight back. Then. Nope,

452
00:37:34.360 --> 00:37:38.400
you know you're not. You're never coming back. I am.

453
00:37:38.440 --> 00:37:41.360
So what I do is I leave the door open.

454
00:37:41.519 --> 00:37:43.840
I don't. I'm not. I don't leave the front door open,

455
00:37:43.880 --> 00:37:46.000
but I leave it so it doesn't close. You know,

456
00:37:47.480 --> 00:37:49.519
Well that's open then, isn't it. You know what I mean?

457
00:37:49.519 --> 00:37:52.159
It's not wide open, it's not pushed open, it's not

458
00:37:52.760 --> 00:37:59.639
kept open by a door opening device. It's but it's

459
00:37:59.719 --> 00:38:02.920
kind of of there's a gap, a little gap so

460
00:38:02.960 --> 00:38:05.599
you can hear me, so I can talk to him,

461
00:38:05.679 --> 00:38:07.440
so if he barks, I can talk to him as

462
00:38:07.440 --> 00:38:12.159
I go down the stairs, right, Vinnie, I'm just taking

463
00:38:12.199 --> 00:38:14.639
the first step now, I'm not leaving. I'm coming back.

464
00:38:16.719 --> 00:38:19.960
I'm halfway down the stairs now, Vinnie. I'm coming back.

465
00:38:20.039 --> 00:38:25.719
I promise. I'm near the bottom of the stairs now, Vinnie, Okay,

466
00:38:27.519 --> 00:38:32.639
just calm down. And then I shouted to him, I'm

467
00:38:32.639 --> 00:38:36.400
going out, ha, see you later, and I run off

468
00:38:37.760 --> 00:38:43.280
and he doesn't like that. But he's quite cool if

469
00:38:43.280 --> 00:38:51.760
he can hear me. He's usually okay, usually, but today,

470
00:38:52.360 --> 00:38:53.880
what was I talking about, Vinnie?

471
00:38:53.920 --> 00:38:54.880
For? Oh?

472
00:38:54.960 --> 00:38:58.960
Yeah, this morning, I just couldn't but I was getting

473
00:38:59.000 --> 00:39:07.320
ready and he he caused a fuss, such a fuss.

474
00:39:09.719 --> 00:39:12.000
I just feel a little bit guilty leaving him because

475
00:39:13.760 --> 00:39:18.239
I know how much he doesn't want me to. Well,

476
00:39:18.320 --> 00:39:22.039
I know, yeah, he doesn't want me to, there's no question.

477
00:39:22.079 --> 00:39:23.920
I mean, yeah, I don't know what's going on in

478
00:39:23.960 --> 00:39:27.480
his mind, and I'm not. I can't. I've got no

479
00:39:29.199 --> 00:39:40.320
thermostat to check his emotional levels. But I've spent what

480
00:39:40.559 --> 00:39:43.480
nearly three years with him, twenty four hours a day

481
00:39:43.519 --> 00:39:46.320
pretty much, so I've kind of got to know him

482
00:39:47.320 --> 00:39:55.840
pretty well. I would say he don't like me leaving him, Yeah,

483
00:39:55.920 --> 00:39:58.800
I think that's pretty certain to say that doesn't like

484
00:39:58.840 --> 00:40:04.559
me leaving him. So I contended with that by I

485
00:40:04.679 --> 00:40:08.039
ordered the taxi and I was getting ready. A taxi

486
00:40:08.079 --> 00:40:11.079
got it early, so it was here about twenty past eight,

487
00:40:14.400 --> 00:40:17.400
or maybe twenty three minutes past eight, but it was early,

488
00:40:17.960 --> 00:40:25.039
but I thought, well, I'm ready. But I was still

489
00:40:25.079 --> 00:40:27.440
doing the last few little bits, putting stuff into a

490
00:40:27.559 --> 00:40:33.440
carrier bag and you know, things like that. Made sure

491
00:40:33.480 --> 00:40:37.840
I had a couple of bottles of water and had

492
00:40:37.920 --> 00:40:46.159
my phone or else on my wallet. I always had

493
00:40:46.199 --> 00:40:48.079
my keys because I have to. I always lock the

494
00:40:48.079 --> 00:40:52.599
door if I leave, so I can't leave without my keys, unless,

495
00:40:52.599 --> 00:40:54.559
of course, I mean if I lost my keys, and

496
00:40:55.119 --> 00:40:58.800
I'll be in trouble. But it's not something generally that happens.

497
00:40:59.760 --> 00:41:02.320
Or I did lose my wallet. I thought I lost

498
00:41:02.320 --> 00:41:06.400
what Technically, I thought i'd lost my wallet because I

499
00:41:06.400 --> 00:41:10.400
couldn't find it. But that is losing your wallet, isn't it.

500
00:41:10.440 --> 00:41:15.639
Isn't that literally the literal meaning of losing something not

501
00:41:15.719 --> 00:41:20.360
being able to find it. So I had indeed lost

502
00:41:20.400 --> 00:41:28.079
my wallet, but I also hadn't lost it because it

503
00:41:28.199 --> 00:41:32.960
was in here somewhere, and I did find it. But

504
00:41:33.039 --> 00:41:36.559
it took quite a bit of searching, and it was

505
00:41:36.639 --> 00:41:40.760
underneath a bunch of paperwork. I think it was either

506
00:41:40.840 --> 00:41:43.719
on that table over there or the other table, which

507
00:41:43.760 --> 00:41:47.800
is meaningless because you can't see where I'm pointing, can you. Oh? Well,

508
00:41:50.920 --> 00:41:55.039
but temporarily i'd lost it, and I didn't really think

509
00:41:55.079 --> 00:41:56.719
that I was going to have to phone the bank

510
00:41:57.000 --> 00:42:02.480
cancel the card. That's it, really, There's nothing really much

511
00:42:02.519 --> 00:42:08.639
else in there. My bus pass, I think that's it.

512
00:42:08.880 --> 00:42:16.119
There's nothing else in there. There might have been ten

513
00:42:16.199 --> 00:42:21.360
or twenty pounds in cash. I think it's always handed

514
00:42:21.360 --> 00:42:27.239
to at a little bit of cash for emergencies, just

515
00:42:27.519 --> 00:42:32.719
because I had a problem before this is during my

516
00:42:32.880 --> 00:42:38.079
traveling to the hospital every day where the credit card

517
00:42:38.199 --> 00:42:42.280
machine didn't work, or in the taxi and I tried

518
00:42:42.280 --> 00:42:45.920
it twice and it still didn't work. Luckily I had

519
00:42:46.920 --> 00:42:49.079
I think I had about one hundred pounds in cash

520
00:42:49.360 --> 00:42:52.119
in my wallet that I drawn out the day before

521
00:42:52.559 --> 00:42:56.000
from the cash machine because I knew it was going

522
00:42:56.079 --> 00:42:57.960
to be expensive. I was going to have to buy

523
00:42:58.000 --> 00:43:03.800
stuff in the hospital, drinks and food and stuff for

524
00:43:03.960 --> 00:43:09.280
me and Uncle, sausages. So I had this cash, but

525
00:43:09.320 --> 00:43:14.400
I wasn't going to use it in the taxi. I

526
00:43:14.440 --> 00:43:16.800
was just going to use the card in a taxi,

527
00:43:19.000 --> 00:43:21.599
so I paid the card. I say, I tried it twice,

528
00:43:21.679 --> 00:43:23.960
didn't work. It turns out it was the machine that

529
00:43:24.039 --> 00:43:27.079
was fault. You're not me. And I said, look, I

530
00:43:27.159 --> 00:43:31.599
literally just got paid yesterday and there's enough money in there.

531
00:43:32.559 --> 00:43:34.480
And I showed him, I like, look on my phone

532
00:43:34.719 --> 00:43:37.599
and I said, oh, is that all you got? I said,

533
00:43:37.880 --> 00:43:42.400
come on, that's rude. He said, you're rude. And he said,

534
00:43:42.400 --> 00:43:44.199
are you going to keep saying that when anyone says

535
00:43:44.199 --> 00:43:47.079
you're rude and then you say you're rude? Is that

536
00:43:47.559 --> 00:43:50.280
You've been doing that for seven years? Can't you try

537
00:43:50.320 --> 00:43:56.800
something different? I said, I'm always trying different things always.

538
00:43:58.039 --> 00:44:00.440
I mean, I'm going to talk about scraws again. Minute.

539
00:44:01.400 --> 00:44:03.280
Do you mean a game? Okay, not a game, but

540
00:44:04.119 --> 00:44:06.639
I haven't talked about squirrels for a while, and I

541
00:44:06.639 --> 00:44:08.920
was going to talk about squirrels and that was perhaps

542
00:44:08.920 --> 00:44:13.199
going to be my my new thing. What a new

543
00:44:13.960 --> 00:44:17.280
thing about squirrels? What is it?

544
00:44:17.320 --> 00:44:17.519
Then?

545
00:44:17.800 --> 00:44:20.239
I said, well, I can't tell you now. That's going

546
00:44:20.320 --> 00:44:26.440
to ruin it for everyone. I wanted to be a surprise. Okay,

547
00:44:27.880 --> 00:44:30.239
or is it a story? Is it a pun? Is

548
00:44:30.280 --> 00:44:33.880
it a joke? What's the story? It's just a little story,

549
00:44:34.719 --> 00:44:39.440
but it's something that will delight your world once you

550
00:44:39.519 --> 00:44:42.320
hear it. He said, really, well, told me now, and

551
00:44:42.360 --> 00:44:46.719
then I said no, no, So I paid him the cash,

552
00:44:46.960 --> 00:44:52.000
got out, and I ran home because I just thought

553
00:44:52.000 --> 00:44:54.239
he was going to chase me until I told him

554
00:44:54.239 --> 00:45:06.039
what the story was. And the next day, right, I

555
00:45:06.079 --> 00:45:12.320
get into a taxi, I try and use the the

556
00:45:12.440 --> 00:45:15.400
card debit card. I don't have any credit cards but

557
00:45:15.480 --> 00:45:19.440
a debit card, and it declined it again. I'm thinking

558
00:45:19.679 --> 00:45:28.960
what so I paid cash. I go into on the way. Yeah.

559
00:45:28.960 --> 00:45:34.920
I go into the petrol station. It declines. It declines

560
00:45:34.960 --> 00:45:43.719
my card and I put it in the code, still

561
00:45:43.760 --> 00:45:55.000
declines it. I go to the machine outside declines. Luckily

562
00:45:55.039 --> 00:45:57.119
I got my card back. It didn't steal my card.

563
00:45:58.199 --> 00:46:01.400
Start paid by cash in in the petro station because

564
00:46:01.440 --> 00:46:03.599
only to get a couple of drinks or something. It

565
00:46:03.679 --> 00:46:10.400
wasn't anything big, and I'm thinking, wow, this is not good.

566
00:46:10.800 --> 00:46:14.239
I get to the hospital. I go into Costas to

567
00:46:14.280 --> 00:46:17.079
buy some coffee, one for I think I might got

568
00:46:17.079 --> 00:46:23.679
one myself. The thing is, I don't drink coffee very much.

569
00:46:24.679 --> 00:46:27.599
And I realized now why I can't drink coffee. It

570
00:46:27.920 --> 00:46:32.159
makes me feel unwell. But I used to drink coffee.

571
00:46:32.199 --> 00:46:33.760
I used to have well, there was a time when

572
00:46:33.800 --> 00:46:40.079
I used to drink coffee, like really regularly, multiple times

573
00:46:40.119 --> 00:46:48.880
a day. And even going back many years, I've been

574
00:46:49.159 --> 00:46:52.199
on and off the coffee. I've gone years about drinking

575
00:46:52.199 --> 00:46:54.559
coffee and then I go period when I'm just drinking

576
00:46:54.559 --> 00:47:00.880
it a lot. I can't drink it really anymore and

577
00:47:01.920 --> 00:47:05.119
makes me feel ill, give him palpitations and stuff. It's

578
00:47:05.159 --> 00:47:17.719
just a bit too much. So anyway, I got this coffee.

579
00:47:18.000 --> 00:47:20.119
I think I got two cups of coffee because I

580
00:47:20.159 --> 00:47:27.519
thought I'll treat myself. I'm getting him a coffee. I

581
00:47:27.559 --> 00:47:29.079
think it was a bit of a cloudy day that

582
00:47:29.159 --> 00:47:33.239
day because this was during when Uncle Sausages first went

583
00:47:33.480 --> 00:47:39.039
to hospital. It was probably the hottest week on record

584
00:47:39.920 --> 00:47:46.000
in this country. Ever, it was not really really hot,

585
00:47:47.800 --> 00:47:54.119
you know, just really hot on those days. We didn't

586
00:47:54.159 --> 00:47:59.320
have coffee, or he didn't have coffee, but he did

587
00:47:59.360 --> 00:48:01.599
have air conditioning in his.

588
00:48:03.199 --> 00:48:03.559
Ward.

589
00:48:04.800 --> 00:48:07.159
It wasn't like a proper air conditioning. It's one of

590
00:48:07.199 --> 00:48:09.079
those things where they stick a big tube out of

591
00:48:09.079 --> 00:48:12.760
the window, one of those things. That's what I mean.

592
00:48:12.800 --> 00:48:15.199
It wasn't in built to the structure of the building,

593
00:48:15.239 --> 00:48:20.000
That's what I mean. It did the job, definitely, and

594
00:48:21.199 --> 00:48:25.480
if anything, they're probably better because they're dealing with direct air,

595
00:48:26.119 --> 00:48:28.960
so you're not just spreading all around the entire building,

596
00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:31.639
which I think is probably a good idea for a

597
00:48:31.639 --> 00:48:36.360
hospital not to have air conditioning. Spreading the air from

598
00:48:36.360 --> 00:48:39.880
one ward to another doesn't seem like a very good

599
00:48:39.880 --> 00:48:43.559
idea generally, if I think about it. Not that I'm

600
00:48:43.559 --> 00:48:53.039
an expert on ward air. So I've got small bottles

601
00:48:53.039 --> 00:48:58.159
of water delivered today, So I've now got one two

602
00:48:58.199 --> 00:49:05.280
through four. I found seven packs of twelve is it

603
00:49:05.400 --> 00:49:10.880
twelve or six? Possibly seven packs of six, I don't know,

604
00:49:11.719 --> 00:49:15.639
So I'm really and I've got some more face wipes,

605
00:49:17.039 --> 00:49:24.639
some more what else should I get, because I've been

606
00:49:24.760 --> 00:49:30.760
stocking up for the rest of the year, and I'm

607
00:49:30.800 --> 00:49:36.239
quite pleased with how it's gone, because okay, it's not food,

608
00:49:36.880 --> 00:49:40.280
and the closest thing to anything I've got there that's food. Well,

609
00:49:40.440 --> 00:49:44.119
water is the most important thing in the world, isn't

610
00:49:44.119 --> 00:49:49.159
it to have? But apart from okay, most of it's

611
00:49:49.239 --> 00:49:52.320
not going to be going into my mouth other than

612
00:49:52.360 --> 00:49:56.559
the water and the tea bags. I don't mean I

613
00:49:56.639 --> 00:49:58.639
eat the tea bacs. I mean, you know, for tea.

614
00:49:59.199 --> 00:50:01.880
And I've got enough to to last me for the

615
00:50:01.920 --> 00:50:05.719
rest of the year as well, so that's good. But

616
00:50:05.800 --> 00:50:10.840
everything else is just like mouth washed, toothpaste, deodorant, and

617
00:50:11.960 --> 00:50:22.880
toilet paper, washing up liquid. I'm just trying to think.

618
00:50:23.559 --> 00:50:29.760
I've also got quite a few Yeah, I got quite

619
00:50:29.760 --> 00:50:37.199
a few boxes of cereal now, so I've got like

620
00:50:37.840 --> 00:50:42.199
five or six boxes of ready bread, about six boxes

621
00:50:42.320 --> 00:50:50.000
of Mooseley, So you know, it's just getting stocked up

622
00:50:50.079 --> 00:50:55.840
ready so I can It wasn't really about getting stocked

623
00:50:55.920 --> 00:50:59.880
up on food, but that is. That's food, isn't it.

624
00:51:00.800 --> 00:51:03.719
But it's definitely going to be handy because if I

625
00:51:03.760 --> 00:51:08.639
suddenly didn't have a penny, I can still eat. I've

626
00:51:08.639 --> 00:51:11.639
got my breakfast cereal I can have that. I've got water,

627
00:51:11.920 --> 00:51:14.719
I've got you know, so I've got the bear of sentrals.

628
00:51:15.320 --> 00:51:17.639
I'm not going to run out of toilet paper anytime soon.

629
00:51:20.639 --> 00:51:23.079
The only thing that I need more of is shampoo.

630
00:51:24.000 --> 00:51:32.840
Don't laugh. When I get in a shower, I still

631
00:51:32.880 --> 00:51:38.639
shampooed my hair twice. I do. Do you know people

632
00:51:38.679 --> 00:51:41.159
always you know, people always looking those kind of people

633
00:51:41.199 --> 00:51:46.119
are always looking for a blame, always looking for a

634
00:51:46.159 --> 00:51:49.000
reason to blame. You know. It's because of that. It's

635
00:51:49.000 --> 00:51:51.400
because you do this, because you do that. They are

636
00:51:51.400 --> 00:51:53.920
the ones I be thinking. It's because you're back your

637
00:51:53.920 --> 00:51:57.039
shampoo your hair twice a day, that's why. That's why

638
00:51:57.079 --> 00:52:02.800
it's falling out. It's not why. Trust me, I've gone periods, well,

639
00:52:02.800 --> 00:52:06.480
I've not washed my hair for periods of time and

640
00:52:06.519 --> 00:52:10.039
it's still falling out. It's not because of that. Besides,

641
00:52:10.760 --> 00:52:13.880
I've had a shaven head most of my life. Really,

642
00:52:17.239 --> 00:52:20.159
I don't shampoo my hair. When I've got a shaven head.

643
00:52:20.519 --> 00:52:23.159
I might give it little a little bit of shampoo

644
00:52:23.320 --> 00:52:26.159
just but that's it, just for the scalp. But I

645
00:52:27.360 --> 00:52:33.519
I don't have to do much when it's shaven. And

646
00:52:33.559 --> 00:52:38.519
my hair has been really really short or shaven most

647
00:52:38.559 --> 00:52:45.000
of the time since two thousand and two. And there's

648
00:52:45.000 --> 00:52:48.920
been periods when it's been really long and bushy, but

649
00:52:49.320 --> 00:52:53.440
generally that's when I look baldest. It's when it's long,

650
00:52:55.320 --> 00:53:00.000
that's when you can see the big gaps between follicles.

651
00:53:00.039 --> 00:53:09.199
It really stands out tht. Wow, it's almost like Ian.

652
00:53:09.280 --> 00:53:12.960
It was so it was so frizzy and long. I

653
00:53:12.960 --> 00:53:17.760
remember my friend Luke. He said, hold on a second.

654
00:53:18.559 --> 00:53:21.039
I said, Well, he just walked over to me and

655
00:53:21.079 --> 00:53:25.280
he parted because I used to have my hair kind

656
00:53:25.320 --> 00:53:29.079
of back but sort of standing up. He didn't like it.

657
00:53:29.159 --> 00:53:32.920
He said, just shave it off. I said no. I said,

658
00:53:32.920 --> 00:53:36.960
you're just jealous because I've got hair. I didn't like

659
00:53:37.000 --> 00:53:39.480
that because he was border than me. That's why I

660
00:53:39.519 --> 00:53:43.159
said it. Anyway, he came and I said, wait a second.

661
00:53:43.760 --> 00:53:48.360
The thing is he suited being bored. That's the problem.

662
00:53:49.199 --> 00:53:51.440
He looked good, he would it didn't matter if he

663
00:53:51.480 --> 00:53:54.000
had hair or not hair. He looked good. It was

664
00:53:54.039 --> 00:53:56.840
a good looking bloke. And he had the right face

665
00:53:56.880 --> 00:54:05.760
structure for being bald. I don't have. Yeah, I don't

666
00:54:05.840 --> 00:54:12.239
have the right face for balderedness. It's not fair. Anyway,

667
00:54:12.239 --> 00:54:14.559
he came up to me and he said, I stay still.

668
00:54:15.719 --> 00:54:19.880
I thought there was a spider in my hair. That's

669
00:54:19.920 --> 00:54:23.000
what I thought, like a little money spider. Because he

670
00:54:23.079 --> 00:54:28.280
was very superstitious and he's you know, apparently if you

671
00:54:28.280 --> 00:54:34.360
get a money spider, you was it you don't you

672
00:54:34.440 --> 00:54:36.960
like put it? You did? You swing it around your

673
00:54:37.039 --> 00:54:40.159
head twice or something, and then money will come into

674
00:54:40.199 --> 00:54:47.360
your life. Yeah, he's one of these people that used

675
00:54:47.360 --> 00:55:01.519
to salute magpies. Seriously. He once said to me, right, okay,

676
00:55:02.679 --> 00:55:06.519
oh don't because I think my hair was. I grew

677
00:55:06.639 --> 00:55:09.400
my hair really it was. It was really out of control.

678
00:55:09.960 --> 00:55:13.280
And he said, I don't want it that. We've got

679
00:55:13.400 --> 00:55:15.239
to go out. I said, because you want to go

680
00:55:15.280 --> 00:55:18.800
to the petro station. He said, kind of do some

681
00:55:18.960 --> 00:55:21.360
with your hair? Said what he said? I don't want

682
00:55:21.360 --> 00:55:25.599
to be seeing in public with you like that? All right,

683
00:55:25.679 --> 00:55:30.599
So he was embarrassed by me. So on the main road,

684
00:55:32.840 --> 00:55:35.719
all these cars going fast, he's worried about me. I

685
00:55:35.719 --> 00:55:37.840
think I'm wearing a hat just to cover my hair up.

686
00:55:38.760 --> 00:55:41.880
What does he do? He stops and start He salutes

687
00:55:46.159 --> 00:55:49.119
a bird. What did I call him? Not pigeons? The

688
00:55:49.159 --> 00:55:57.119
ones that steal stuff. He actually salutes one of them.

689
00:55:57.320 --> 00:56:04.639
And he's worried about embarrassing me. And I said, you're embarrassing.

690
00:56:05.960 --> 00:56:10.440
I said, that was embarrassing my hair. You're you're you're

691
00:56:10.440 --> 00:56:15.559
saluting magpies while there's traffic. It's people on the bus

692
00:56:15.639 --> 00:56:20.880
going past looking at us, We're looking at you. And

693
00:56:20.920 --> 00:56:27.360
he said, well, what's weird about saluting about a magpie? Well,

694
00:56:27.360 --> 00:56:32.840
there's two things. First of all, you're saluting a magpie

695
00:56:32.880 --> 00:56:35.719
in itself. That's weird. And it's the kind of salute

696
00:56:35.760 --> 00:56:41.480
you were doing that. No, no, dumb jacket. So that's

697
00:56:41.519 --> 00:56:45.360
been illegal for seventy years, that kind of salute. So yeah, no,

698
00:56:45.800 --> 00:56:48.800
I think. Oh, because he walked up to me, so

699
00:56:48.840 --> 00:56:52.800
I'm sitting here and he said, wait a second, and

700
00:56:52.840 --> 00:56:54.880
I think he's a lot of money spider or something

701
00:56:54.920 --> 00:56:58.599
so or because it was in the summer, I thought

702
00:56:58.599 --> 00:57:02.880
maybe something that got the He pied my hair and

703
00:57:02.880 --> 00:57:05.280
he said, I can't believe it what I found. I thought,

704
00:57:06.559 --> 00:57:10.880
here he goes, he's gonna make some joke about you know,

705
00:57:11.039 --> 00:57:16.840
he's Daddy's long leg or something, you know. And he said,

706
00:57:17.280 --> 00:57:22.079
I've just discovered a new rainforest tribe in your hair

707
00:57:23.039 --> 00:57:25.360
and have made up like this whole and he was

708
00:57:25.400 --> 00:57:28.400
going on about how they'd like, you know, build this

709
00:57:28.840 --> 00:57:37.360
new little settlement on my bald patch, very very rude,

710
00:57:38.920 --> 00:57:41.280
and I thought, this is ridiculous, the weird thing. But

711
00:57:41.360 --> 00:57:46.519
then right, get this, I'm sitting there, the smoke alarm

712
00:57:46.639 --> 00:57:50.320
goes off. I'm like, why has the smoke alarm gone off?

713
00:57:50.360 --> 00:57:57.079
I'm not cooking anything. It's weird. I go out. I

714
00:57:57.119 --> 00:57:59.800
could I turn it off? I had to put a stick.

715
00:58:00.119 --> 00:58:02.480
I'm not tall enough to reach it, but Luke was

716
00:58:02.519 --> 00:58:05.360
tall enough. So I did it a couple of times

717
00:58:05.400 --> 00:58:08.039
and I was like, it kept coming back on again.

718
00:58:08.360 --> 00:58:09.639
So I called him up and said, can you have

719
00:58:09.639 --> 00:58:15.480
a look at my fire alarm? My smoke alarm? Because

720
00:58:15.480 --> 00:58:17.559
it was quite good with stuff like that. The way

721
00:58:17.599 --> 00:58:20.840
I was thinking is just take the thing off, disconnect it,

722
00:58:21.320 --> 00:58:23.920
or see if it needs new batteries or something like that.

723
00:58:24.199 --> 00:58:27.880
Because this is I can't. It's like, well, well, well

724
00:58:27.960 --> 00:58:33.719
continuously he came up and I said, look, well if

725
00:58:33.480 --> 00:58:36.480
the first thing he said is for the full first

726
00:58:36.519 --> 00:58:38.960
thing he said, is it's a smoke alarm. I said,

727
00:58:39.000 --> 00:58:41.559
I know, I know what it is. I can I

728
00:58:41.559 --> 00:58:45.280
can hear it. He said, all right. I said, well

729
00:58:45.440 --> 00:58:47.719
that's why I called you up to help me with that,

730
00:58:47.880 --> 00:58:50.280
because I don't know what to do with it. He said,

731
00:58:50.360 --> 00:58:53.159
he tried turning it off. There's a button you press.

732
00:58:54.119 --> 00:58:56.800
I said, I know, there's a button. I have done that.

733
00:58:56.960 --> 00:59:02.000
I've used the broom handle, I said. He said, well,

734
00:59:02.039 --> 00:59:06.719
don't use the mop handle. I said, jay Z's lost it.

735
00:59:08.119 --> 00:59:09.840
Oh that's good. And the way I kind of connected

736
00:59:09.840 --> 00:59:16.519
it back to earlier anyway, Beyonce's fuming, fuman and furious,

737
00:59:17.719 --> 00:59:19.840
and he said what I said, don't worry about it?

738
00:59:20.880 --> 00:59:24.400
And I said, can you sort it out? He said,

739
00:59:24.400 --> 00:59:28.840
all right, He turned it off. He just like pressed it.

740
00:59:28.840 --> 00:59:30.840
Because he was a lot taller than me, he was

741
00:59:30.840 --> 00:59:34.480
about nine foot tall. He bent, he had to bend

742
00:59:34.559 --> 00:59:41.320
down to press it. And he came on again and

743
00:59:41.320 --> 00:59:43.880
he said, well, you've got something. Obviously you've got something

744
00:59:43.960 --> 00:59:47.480
setting it off. Are you cooking something? And I said no,

745
00:59:47.559 --> 00:59:50.440
and he opened his no nothing. He looked at the

746
00:59:50.880 --> 00:59:54.880
kitchen and nothing. He looked in the bathroom. I said,

747
00:59:54.880 --> 00:59:57.920
I don't cook in the bathroom, do I? He said,

748
00:59:57.960 --> 01:00:01.719
I don't know? With you? Just what does that mean?

749
01:00:03.239 --> 01:00:06.239
That it doesn't matter? But you know, you do some

750
01:00:06.280 --> 01:00:15.239
weird things sometimes, Jay, It's okay, And so I just

751
01:00:15.239 --> 01:00:16.800
turned my back on him. I'm like, I don't what

752
01:00:16.920 --> 01:00:22.239
to do next. The alarm goes off again and he's

753
01:00:22.320 --> 01:00:27.119
like presses a button. At this point, he starts laughing

754
01:00:29.039 --> 01:00:33.119
and pointing at me, which is a little bit rude.

755
01:00:33.559 --> 01:00:38.800
And I said, were you laughing? And he couldn't stop laughing.

756
01:00:38.800 --> 01:00:40.760
He's like he couldn't talk, he was laughing so much.

757
01:00:42.000 --> 01:00:44.679
I said, why are you laughing? He said, I've just

758
01:00:44.719 --> 01:00:50.760
seen where the smoke's coming from. I said, what he said,

759
01:00:50.760 --> 01:00:52.719
do you like a little tribe on your board patch?

760
01:00:53.840 --> 01:01:02.159
They started a fire. They're having a little bonfire, having

761
01:01:02.199 --> 01:01:08.119
a big cookout or something. That's when I knew perhaps

762
01:01:08.159 --> 01:01:15.559
I needed to shave my head because it's I think

763
01:01:15.599 --> 01:01:21.400
it's bad right because I actually at the hospital. There

764
01:01:21.480 --> 01:01:25.400
was an emergency. Because this was in the summer, there's

765
01:01:25.480 --> 01:01:28.760
lots of emergencies, I'm sure, but there was a serious thing.

766
01:01:28.719 --> 01:01:33.039
And the helicopter came down. Everyone was watching looking at

767
01:01:33.079 --> 01:01:38.440
the sky. But everyone as like an ambulance, emergency ambulance

768
01:01:38.960 --> 01:01:46.599
somewhere there. It is ambulance, helicopter ambulance is that what

769
01:01:46.639 --> 01:01:50.719
they call them. So it's coming, it's like coming down.

770
01:01:50.800 --> 01:01:56.199
Everyone had their phones out looking at everything, and they

771
01:01:56.239 --> 01:01:58.360
were looking at that up in the sky and I'm

772
01:01:58.360 --> 01:02:02.079
looking at thinking, okay, well this is interesting. I've never

773
01:02:02.119 --> 01:02:06.440
seen helicopter. I've seen one land in the field a

774
01:02:06.440 --> 01:02:10.719
couple of times, but I've never seen one land at

775
01:02:10.719 --> 01:02:15.440
the actual hospital. And they're all looking up with their phones,

776
01:02:16.519 --> 01:02:19.519
and I'm thinking of just like coming, you're seeing a

777
01:02:19.519 --> 01:02:23.119
helicopter before. Why And I'm sure the people getting out

778
01:02:23.159 --> 01:02:26.639
of the helicopter don't want to be filmed. They don't

779
01:02:26.639 --> 01:02:32.800
want you all staring at them. And I kind of

780
01:02:32.880 --> 01:02:38.320
mumbled that, and suddenly one person points their phone at me,

781
01:02:40.440 --> 01:02:43.119
and another person points their phone at me, and I

782
01:02:43.239 --> 01:02:46.559
got about fifteen people pointing their phone at me, and

783
01:02:46.559 --> 01:02:52.280
I'm thinking I said that too loud, and I said

784
01:02:54.039 --> 01:02:57.519
I didn't know what to say. I was a bit embarrassed. Well,

785
01:02:57.559 --> 01:03:01.320
it turned out what actually happened, and they didn't hear

786
01:03:01.360 --> 01:03:04.320
me say that. It turned out that helicopter was trying

787
01:03:04.320 --> 01:03:11.360
to land on my board patch. That was very long winded,

788
01:03:11.440 --> 01:03:20.039
wasn't it. I think if I made it shorter me, Ah, there,

789
01:03:20.679 --> 01:03:22.880
I don't I do. I don't do short, really do.

790
01:03:23.239 --> 01:03:26.360
Everything I do is long winded. It's kind of supposed

791
01:03:26.400 --> 01:03:32.800
to be. So I get I get there early to

792
01:03:32.960 --> 01:03:38.639
the hot to the the farewell ceremony, and I see

793
01:03:38.679 --> 01:03:44.199
these squirrels. So there's this whole green area like trees

794
01:03:44.599 --> 01:03:50.800
and shrubbery and flowers, and it's really lovely. I mean,

795
01:03:52.280 --> 01:03:57.400
it'd make a lovely garden to walk around in, you know,

796
01:03:57.559 --> 01:04:01.159
if I was in a I was in a residential

797
01:04:01.280 --> 01:04:05.400
care home or something in my older years. That's something

798
01:04:05.559 --> 01:04:11.239
quite like to walk around because it's it's nature, but

799
01:04:11.320 --> 01:04:16.719
it's it's contained. It's not huge, but it's definitely big

800
01:04:16.800 --> 01:04:19.119
enough to go for a nice walk. You kind of

801
01:04:19.119 --> 01:04:27.880
go in a circle. And having a cemetery there be

802
01:04:27.960 --> 01:04:32.360
quite handy, wouldn't it as well? Save traveling? So but

803
01:04:32.440 --> 01:04:35.679
I'm walking around and I see these two things. I'm

804
01:04:35.800 --> 01:04:37.719
huge and rustling, and I'm trying to figure out where

805
01:04:37.719 --> 01:04:41.159
it's coming from. Now you already know it's coming from

806
01:04:41.159 --> 01:04:43.840
the squirrels because I mentioned the squirrels too soon, didn't I.

807
01:04:44.400 --> 01:04:48.639
But let's forget that I mentioned the squirrels. Let's just

808
01:04:48.840 --> 01:04:54.639
it erased that. So I'm walking through this like covering.

809
01:04:56.920 --> 01:05:00.360
It was like a wooden structure that was built and

810
01:05:00.400 --> 01:05:05.199
it looks like it's being built to commemorate a specific person,

811
01:05:06.480 --> 01:05:08.400
and so it's a lovely little structure. I think there

812
01:05:08.480 --> 01:05:11.760
might be some seats in there, So walking through they're

813
01:05:11.920 --> 01:05:17.679
really really being careful with my feeting, my feeting, my footing,

814
01:05:17.880 --> 01:05:21.039
my walking, trying to be calm and quiet. That's what

815
01:05:21.079 --> 01:05:25.039
I'm trying to say. And I'm not sure what I'm

816
01:05:25.039 --> 01:05:26.960
gonna I'm gonna turn in the corner. I don't know

817
01:05:27.000 --> 01:05:30.000
what I'm going to see that. You know, it's squirrels.

818
01:05:30.920 --> 01:05:32.679
So I don't know why I'm even going through this

819
01:05:33.079 --> 01:05:36.639
part of the story. But anyway I turn around, I'm

820
01:05:36.639 --> 01:05:42.199
looking and thinking, I wonder if it's another gardener. I

821
01:05:42.280 --> 01:05:46.840
wonder if someone asleep. I don't know. I don't when

822
01:05:46.840 --> 01:05:53.199
I say asleep, not buried, and not someone trying to

823
01:05:53.239 --> 01:05:56.599
dig themselves out noly like that. It's not zombies, but

824
01:05:56.679 --> 01:06:02.239
I wondered, and I thought, maybe it's someone pitched a

825
01:06:02.320 --> 01:06:06.519
tent and they're sleeping there. And I thought, I don't

826
01:06:06.519 --> 01:06:10.280
want to disturb them. If they are, it does look

827
01:06:10.320 --> 01:06:13.119
like somewhere that maybe someone would climb over the fence

828
01:06:13.639 --> 01:06:18.159
set a tent up because it's quite it's quiet, it's

829
01:06:18.239 --> 01:06:26.440
quite quiet and secluded. But I imagine they'd be asked

830
01:06:26.440 --> 01:06:33.679
to leave, you know, if there was seen during the day.

831
01:06:34.480 --> 01:06:36.679
And I thought, maybe it's birds. I mean, you know,

832
01:06:36.760 --> 01:06:38.679
it's squirrels or I don't know why I'm going for

833
01:06:38.800 --> 01:06:44.599
all the different particular what it might have been. It

834
01:06:44.679 --> 01:06:45.880
might have been a ufo.

835
01:06:47.159 --> 01:06:47.239
No.

836
01:06:48.119 --> 01:06:50.880
Anyway, I turned around and I see these squirrels running

837
01:06:50.920 --> 01:06:55.280
along the grass. And because with neely in autumn, there's

838
01:06:55.360 --> 01:07:00.599
quite a few leaves on the ground already, and a

839
01:07:00.639 --> 01:07:03.599
lot of the fruits dropping off the trees, the nuts

840
01:07:03.679 --> 01:07:07.000
off the hazel nut trees. And I think they have

841
01:07:07.039 --> 01:07:12.480
hazel nuts, don't they and different things like that. So

842
01:07:12.519 --> 01:07:14.559
I see these things running across the ground and I'm

843
01:07:14.559 --> 01:07:18.960
thinking what they are? But we all know as squirrels.

844
01:07:19.719 --> 01:07:25.840
But there were gray squirrels. Now, I don't know. I

845
01:07:25.880 --> 01:07:34.199
think I'm correct in saying that in England, no is

846
01:07:34.239 --> 01:07:37.360
it a gray squirrels? Is it a red squirrels that

847
01:07:37.400 --> 01:07:41.079
we don't see anymore much? Anyway, these were gray squirrels,

848
01:07:42.039 --> 01:07:47.400
and they really matched the tree that they were climbing

849
01:07:47.440 --> 01:07:50.079
up and down. But they were climbing up and down backwards,

850
01:07:51.000 --> 01:07:59.679
like climbing down the tree forward. It's like how I

851
01:08:00.119 --> 01:08:01.760
like going up and said, how do you do that?

852
01:08:02.320 --> 01:08:04.199
But I suppose the answer would be where you need

853
01:08:04.239 --> 01:08:06.760
to be a squirrel, mate, don't you you need to

854
01:08:06.800 --> 01:08:10.119
be a squirrel. You can't do this in the same

855
01:08:10.159 --> 01:08:15.719
way as I can't walk around in Then weird shoes

856
01:08:15.719 --> 01:08:20.399
are yours? I said, But shoes aren't weird. What's weird

857
01:08:20.439 --> 01:08:26.479
about them? They just laughed and ran off. Sometimes that's

858
01:08:26.520 --> 01:08:29.399
the worst insult, isn't it When you don't get an explanation,

859
01:08:30.359 --> 01:08:35.119
but it doesn't seem any logic behind the insult. So

860
01:08:35.199 --> 01:08:39.600
if someone laughs at my pink crocs, okay, fair enough.

861
01:08:40.239 --> 01:08:45.800
Maybe to some people, bright pink crocs look like a

862
01:08:45.840 --> 01:08:52.479
weird thing for an adult male to be a very young, handsome,

863
01:08:54.439 --> 01:08:59.920
particularly sexy adult male like myself, to be wearing in public.

864
01:09:03.359 --> 01:09:07.159
But I happen to like the color pink. I do.

865
01:09:07.760 --> 01:09:14.039
I like pink. When I was in my thirties, early thirties,

866
01:09:14.039 --> 01:09:19.760
what about thirty four, I was walking around in pink

867
01:09:19.920 --> 01:09:24.119
and white like pastoral kind of pink and white like

868
01:09:24.279 --> 01:09:30.199
pink tops, almost daring someone to say something, which is

869
01:09:30.199 --> 01:09:36.000
a bit silly really, But it's like I looked awful.

870
01:09:37.840 --> 01:09:41.079
I really did, because because I shaved my head and

871
01:09:41.359 --> 01:09:44.079
there's a picture of me in the newspaper. When I

872
01:09:44.119 --> 01:09:46.800
was doing the free paymently service in two thousand and six,

873
01:09:50.039 --> 01:09:56.760
I looked really bad. You know, I wasn't because I'd

874
01:09:56.800 --> 01:10:01.039
gone from being slim to putting a bit more weight on.

875
01:10:02.880 --> 01:10:05.920
Because in two yeah, two thousand and four, I lost weight.

876
01:10:06.840 --> 01:10:10.760
Two thousand and five, two thousand and six, I put

877
01:10:10.800 --> 01:10:18.319
the weight back on, so I did not have a

878
01:10:18.399 --> 01:10:21.439
six pack. So the old joker, I don't have a

879
01:10:21.479 --> 01:10:24.319
six pack. I now have a keg something like that.

880
01:10:25.560 --> 01:10:36.039
I had a whole pub and I just I had

881
01:10:36.079 --> 01:10:45.720
a degree of confidence for no reason. I was like, well,

882
01:10:45.760 --> 01:10:47.399
you know what, I'm just going to I'm going to

883
01:10:47.439 --> 01:10:53.279
wear some nice clothes, but at the same time, I'm

884
01:10:53.279 --> 01:10:56.760
going to look ridiculous and I'm not going to care.

885
01:10:59.800 --> 01:11:04.239
And some of the stuff I wore wasn't Maybe it was.

886
01:11:05.319 --> 01:11:07.920
It might have been too young for me even then.

887
01:11:10.560 --> 01:11:12.399
I mean, I'm not talking about I wasn't walking around

888
01:11:12.399 --> 01:11:15.800
in school uniform, but it might have been. Maybe what

889
01:11:15.880 --> 01:11:22.159
I was I've never been. I've never been particularly I've

890
01:11:22.159 --> 01:11:24.680
never I would say, and I'm not saying this in

891
01:11:24.680 --> 01:11:28.199
a negative way, but just from my experience of myself,

892
01:11:29.479 --> 01:11:35.119
my eye for fashion is a little bit shortsighted. It

893
01:11:35.159 --> 01:11:42.319
needs glasses, you know, it needs a telescope. I can't really,

894
01:11:44.039 --> 01:11:47.520
I never really had that. I've had a little help

895
01:11:47.520 --> 01:11:50.720
with fashion in the past, a few little like being

896
01:11:50.800 --> 01:11:56.439
took shopping to get clothes. But even then, I'm thinking, really,

897
01:11:56.479 --> 01:12:01.840
you want me to wear that? And I remember I

898
01:12:01.880 --> 01:12:06.000
had like two dates ninety five. One said to me,

899
01:12:07.119 --> 01:12:09.479
because I was wearing I got so yeah, she took

900
01:12:09.520 --> 01:12:14.720
me shopping, took me shopping and bought me some clothes.

901
01:12:15.000 --> 01:12:17.800
And she said, because I was always I was used

902
01:12:17.800 --> 01:12:22.039
to have my shirt hanging out on the outside. But

903
01:12:22.199 --> 01:12:25.640
this is when I was really slim. She said, tuck

904
01:12:25.680 --> 01:12:27.840
it in. Need to tuck it in. So I started

905
01:12:27.880 --> 01:12:31.600
tucking it in. And then the next female I want

906
01:12:31.640 --> 01:12:34.039
a date on, went with a date on, went to

907
01:12:34.079 --> 01:12:38.960
a date on, had a date with She's because I

908
01:12:39.000 --> 01:12:42.039
was always tucking everything in. From then, I'm thinking that

909
01:12:42.119 --> 01:12:46.119
every woman on the whole planet loves shirts tucked in,

910
01:12:46.479 --> 01:12:49.800
which is a silly way to think. I think it's

911
01:12:49.800 --> 01:12:54.760
only about ninety two per So this next lady I dated,

912
01:12:55.079 --> 01:12:58.279
she said, do us a favor. I said, well, I'm

913
01:12:58.399 --> 01:13:05.239
tuck your shirt. So I untucked my shirt. Now, if

914
01:13:05.279 --> 01:13:12.399
you do have your shirt tucked in, don't is a

915
01:13:12.399 --> 01:13:19.760
little bit. Don't tuck it into your underpents, because she

916
01:13:19.840 --> 01:13:22.279
was saying, why is it all damn at the front.

917
01:13:22.720 --> 01:13:27.359
Don't worry about it. But oh, I'm gurgling my stomachs girdled.

918
01:13:28.119 --> 01:13:35.039
I had a fried breakfast this morning after the the ceremony,

919
01:13:37.760 --> 01:13:40.760
went and had a fried breakfast. So basically the people

920
01:13:40.840 --> 01:13:44.520
it was there as me, there was more. There was

921
01:13:44.560 --> 01:13:50.199
more pall bearers than there was audience members. Okay, technically

922
01:13:51.359 --> 01:13:54.600
technically we weren't audience members because it wasn't a show.

923
01:13:55.600 --> 01:14:00.239
Oh dear, I'm using the wrong words. I did that

924
01:14:00.279 --> 01:14:02.880
when I was in the hospital, kept saying, it's all

925
01:14:02.920 --> 01:14:07.319
about customers, like their patients. They're paid, They're not customers

926
01:14:07.359 --> 01:14:14.319
their patients. It's like okay. So there was one, two, three, four, five, six.

927
01:14:14.960 --> 01:14:23.640
Seven of those six were carrying the the thing to

928
01:14:23.720 --> 01:14:26.800
the altar who was the altar to the figure at

929
01:14:26.800 --> 01:14:32.800
the front, ready for the sacrifice, so they want And

930
01:14:32.920 --> 01:14:35.000
there was someone in church who was walking in chart

931
01:14:35.119 --> 01:14:41.279
in front. So there was seven of them. There was me,

932
01:14:44.319 --> 01:14:47.159
There was his old friend that he's had for years,

933
01:14:48.079 --> 01:14:51.399
his old friend's husband that he's also known, probably a

934
01:14:51.640 --> 01:14:56.319
baby as long as he's known her, and then her father,

935
01:14:58.399 --> 01:15:05.800
who is like ninety four four of us seven people

936
01:15:05.880 --> 01:15:11.880
working in the church. Bit whatever, it is four of us,

937
01:15:12.960 --> 01:15:16.079
and one of those was doing the ceremony. He was

938
01:15:16.119 --> 01:15:20.920
holding the ceremony because he's a pastor or. I don't

939
01:15:20.960 --> 01:15:35.760
know whatever. So we left, went to a carvery and

940
01:15:35.880 --> 01:15:39.399
had a cook breakfast. Now here's we're all in a

941
01:15:39.399 --> 01:15:43.800
bit wrong. Not wrong in a bad way. But when

942
01:15:43.840 --> 01:15:45.680
she said yesterday, all going to go and get some

943
01:15:45.720 --> 01:15:50.359
breakfast afterwards, I said, cool, I'm up for that. So

944
01:15:50.680 --> 01:15:53.439
it gave me a lift to there. I gave me

945
01:15:53.520 --> 01:15:55.720
left home as well, which is lovely. But we went

946
01:15:55.760 --> 01:15:58.920
to this place and I'm thinking, good, we'll just order

947
01:15:58.920 --> 01:16:03.760
a breakfast and they'll bring us a breakfast. But no,

948
01:16:03.960 --> 01:16:10.079
it was self service. Now I didn't realize this. So

949
01:16:10.119 --> 01:16:13.880
I go in and the first thing we do is

950
01:16:13.920 --> 01:16:20.680
just go to the bar and order some drinks. And

951
01:16:20.760 --> 01:16:23.600
I said, I think I have a coke please, And

952
01:16:23.640 --> 01:16:25.720
I think two of us had cokes. Two of us

953
01:16:25.800 --> 01:16:29.680
had lemonades or something like that or fruit juice. I forget,

954
01:16:31.359 --> 01:16:36.119
and the lady behind the cara said, yeah, it's all

955
01:16:36.159 --> 01:16:40.800
you can refeel. I said, okay. I didn't like that idea.

956
01:16:41.000 --> 01:16:45.319
I wanted a bottle. I wanted something from behind the bar.

957
01:16:45.800 --> 01:16:47.319
I didn't want to have to walk over there and

958
01:16:47.359 --> 01:16:53.439
get it. I felt lazy. I felt particularly lazy. Plus

959
01:16:54.800 --> 01:16:58.279
I didn't want to walk around when other people were eating.

960
01:16:59.359 --> 01:17:01.119
I just want to it down at the table and

961
01:17:01.159 --> 01:17:04.479
just sort of stay there until we left, walking around

962
01:17:04.600 --> 01:17:10.119
like it's my new living room or something. You know,

963
01:17:11.560 --> 01:17:17.000
it's all these people doing in my home. So I thought,

964
01:17:17.520 --> 01:17:19.960
it's what all you can me feel?

965
01:17:20.000 --> 01:17:20.199
Yeah?

966
01:17:20.319 --> 01:17:24.760
All you can me feel like, well, in no world

967
01:17:24.800 --> 01:17:27.840
am I going to drink more than one pint of

968
01:17:27.960 --> 01:17:34.359
coke pretty much in a day. I don't drink coke anymore.

969
01:17:34.359 --> 01:17:38.279
It's like I have a little bit. And I thought,

970
01:17:38.279 --> 01:17:42.640
I treat myself. And then she and then she said, okay,

971
01:17:43.399 --> 01:17:51.039
fair enough. She gave me a glass, and then someone mentioned, yeah,

972
01:17:51.079 --> 01:17:55.479
that it's over there. It's the pepsi. I said, pepsi.

973
01:17:55.800 --> 01:18:01.279
That's not coke, is it? And she said what I mean?

974
01:18:01.319 --> 01:18:04.239
This is someone that works beyond the bar telling me

975
01:18:04.399 --> 01:18:06.319
I asked for coke, and she points me towards a

976
01:18:06.319 --> 01:18:10.840
pepsi machine. I was like, no, I didn't want PEPSI.

977
01:18:10.880 --> 01:18:16.920
I wanted coke. I'm terrible, and I, I am so precious,

978
01:18:18.520 --> 01:18:23.479
and I said I didn't really, I'm not really a

979
01:18:23.479 --> 01:18:26.159
big fan of PEPSI I'll have it if there's nothing else.

980
01:18:26.199 --> 01:18:28.720
But I said, if you've got coke beyond the bar,

981
01:18:28.840 --> 01:18:31.640
she said, we've got them bottles, not on tap. I said,

982
01:18:32.000 --> 01:18:36.479
could I have a bottle please? She said okay, and

983
01:18:36.520 --> 01:18:40.359
the bloke next to me, the other what's her name is, father,

984
01:18:40.600 --> 01:18:43.279
said I'd have a bottle as well. See he clearly

985
01:18:43.319 --> 01:18:46.600
also didn't fancy going up and waited in a queue

986
01:18:47.239 --> 01:18:49.920
to get his you know, refill law to get that.

987
01:18:52.000 --> 01:18:55.960
So we got a bottle each. As she gets the glasses,

988
01:18:56.039 --> 01:18:58.720
as she starts putting ice in the glass, I said,

989
01:18:58.760 --> 01:19:02.000
no ice please. I really felt like I was being

990
01:19:02.000 --> 01:19:05.399
one of those annoying customers, and I genuinely wasn't trying

991
01:19:05.439 --> 01:19:09.920
to be annoying. If I told her that, I said it,

992
01:19:09.960 --> 01:19:13.239
I hope when everyone left, and when I said I

993
01:19:13.279 --> 01:19:15.680
wasn't trying to be awkward, then I just she said,

994
01:19:15.800 --> 01:19:19.359
I don't worry. She said I wasn't listening anyway. I

995
01:19:19.399 --> 01:19:26.560
said okay. But again the man actually said I know

996
01:19:26.680 --> 01:19:29.880
I should be either. So she seemed to get the

997
01:19:29.880 --> 01:19:34.239
alp with that that the lady beyond the bar. I

998
01:19:34.279 --> 01:19:37.560
don't know. I mean it was, you know, it's quite

999
01:19:37.560 --> 01:19:39.920
a nice day. I don't know if it's just standard

1000
01:19:40.600 --> 01:19:43.600
to have ice, but I never, and I do mean,

1001
01:19:43.720 --> 01:19:50.039
never have ice in my drinks ever. It's just something

1002
01:19:50.079 --> 01:19:53.319
I've learned, not since I was like in my twenties.

1003
01:19:54.119 --> 01:19:56.159
It's just one of the things I don't. I don't.

1004
01:19:57.319 --> 01:20:01.359
They're the same way I don't drink tap water. I

1005
01:20:01.399 --> 01:20:04.680
was a bottled water. It's one of my little idiosyncrasies.

1006
01:20:04.720 --> 01:20:13.199
Maybe maybe baby, maybe baby ahead you. So then all right,

1007
01:20:13.520 --> 01:20:19.439
I'm thinking, okay, well great, where's the menu. There's no menu?

1008
01:20:20.319 --> 01:20:23.800
What do you mean? So I've taken the drinks down,

1009
01:20:24.640 --> 01:20:28.159
it would put them on the tables. She said, there's

1010
01:20:28.159 --> 01:20:33.800
no menu. You just go and help yourself. Really self service?

1011
01:20:37.039 --> 01:20:39.600
What's next? Do I have to actually cut the food

1012
01:20:39.680 --> 01:20:42.600
up myself and put it in my own mouth? I

1013
01:20:42.680 --> 01:20:45.960
was like, what's going on here? The world's changing? Baby?

1014
01:20:46.479 --> 01:20:48.520
I mean, I know I don't get out much, but

1015
01:20:48.600 --> 01:20:53.239
come on, it's some going there. It's like, what's going

1016
01:20:54.479 --> 01:21:03.399
self service food? I've never it just uh uh yeah.

1017
01:21:03.960 --> 01:21:07.039
Most of it was cold, not cold wasn't hot, it

1018
01:21:07.119 --> 01:21:09.399
was kind of warm. I'm not moaning. I guess I

1019
01:21:09.399 --> 01:21:14.079
am moaning, and I really but I had a few bits.

1020
01:21:14.119 --> 01:21:17.199
I grabbed a sausage for Vinnie to bring back. He

1021
01:21:17.279 --> 01:21:21.359
was being all grumpy with me. I wonder where we

1022
01:21:21.359 --> 01:21:23.800
get it from he is he got grumpy for me,

1023
01:21:23.920 --> 01:21:27.520
or if I got grumpy from him, I don't know.

1024
01:21:30.319 --> 01:21:32.399
I think he was grumpy before he even got here.

1025
01:21:33.239 --> 01:21:38.479
He's very temperamental, unlike me. So I had I was

1026
01:21:38.600 --> 01:21:40.840
lasting a queue, so I had my breakfast. I just

1027
01:21:41.399 --> 01:21:43.560
let everyone do their thing first, and then I got

1028
01:21:43.800 --> 01:21:50.399
a few bits for me, and and I'm just like, okay.

1029
01:21:51.439 --> 01:21:55.920
There was a Yorkshire pudding, like a breakfast Yorkshire pudding,

1030
01:21:56.399 --> 01:22:00.279
and I had one because I don't think in my

1031
01:22:00.479 --> 01:22:05.039
entire lifespan, I've ever eaten a Yorkshire pudding with a

1032
01:22:05.159 --> 01:22:12.039
cook breakfast ever. And then a couple came behind me,

1033
01:22:12.680 --> 01:22:15.960
and the lady said, why were a Yorkshire put in there?

1034
01:22:17.199 --> 01:22:20.199
And he said, it's a breakfast Yorkshire pud.

1035
01:22:20.199 --> 01:22:20.279
It.

1036
01:22:22.640 --> 01:22:25.279
I think he was probably chrya like because he saw

1037
01:22:25.279 --> 01:22:27.439
that I had one of my plate Perhaps he was thinking,

1038
01:22:27.479 --> 01:22:30.359
let's not just let's not making fun of this person

1039
01:22:31.880 --> 01:22:33.800
not yet, wait till he's gone, nor will make fun

1040
01:22:33.840 --> 01:22:37.319
of him. They're probably sitting at home now tending their kids.

1041
01:22:37.760 --> 01:22:44.159
He's all this man, Oh cook breakfast. He only had

1042
01:22:44.159 --> 01:22:48.720
a Yorkshire put it on his plate. Well they're we're

1043
01:22:48.720 --> 01:22:53.399
talking about it for years. But yeah, it was quite

1044
01:22:53.479 --> 01:23:01.880
nice because you know it's it was unusual now, Yorkshire

1045
01:23:01.880 --> 01:23:11.039
putting in some egg, very unusual. So we have to

1046
01:23:11.039 --> 01:23:18.159
dinner the breakfast rather, I'm guessing at about ten o'clock, No,

1047
01:23:18.279 --> 01:23:22.239
probably half ten, about half ten we got that, I'd

1048
01:23:22.319 --> 01:23:30.279
say half nine year probably caught past ten, half ten.

1049
01:23:31.640 --> 01:23:41.079
I got here back here before eleven, No, did I.

1050
01:23:43.199 --> 01:23:43.279
No?

1051
01:23:43.319 --> 01:23:47.399
I think I got back here about half eleven something

1052
01:23:47.479 --> 01:23:49.680
like that. So we were probably in there about an

1053
01:23:49.720 --> 01:23:56.319
hour and we were just talking about uncle's sausages, and

1054
01:23:56.359 --> 01:23:58.479
they were telling me stuff that I'd not heard before,

1055
01:23:58.520 --> 01:24:00.560
and I was telling the stuff that they had not before.

1056
01:24:00.640 --> 01:24:05.399
Because I had a lot more contact with him than

1057
01:24:05.439 --> 01:24:08.399
anyone else. I was the only person that had regular

1058
01:24:08.439 --> 01:24:13.319
contact with him, as in face to face, because he

1059
01:24:13.399 --> 01:24:18.199
was always when it was like a little school kid,

1060
01:24:18.319 --> 01:24:21.159
sometimes like a little naughty boy, because whenever he did

1061
01:24:21.199 --> 01:24:25.279
something that was a bit I don't know, Okay, it

1062
01:24:25.399 --> 01:24:30.159
do something and it's say, don't tell her. That was

1063
01:24:30.199 --> 01:24:34.439
his do the other the other lady, and she looked

1064
01:24:34.479 --> 01:24:36.520
out for him. She bought him, used to get him

1065
01:24:36.520 --> 01:24:42.119
food once a month and water him, and had over Christmas.

1066
01:24:42.199 --> 01:24:44.079
So she'd known him for a long time, or he'd

1067
01:24:44.119 --> 01:24:47.119
known her for a long time, about thirty odd years.

1068
01:24:49.520 --> 01:24:52.119
But whenever he did anything that was like that, he

1069
01:24:52.199 --> 01:24:53.760
knew that she'd disapprove of.

1070
01:24:55.399 --> 01:24:55.439
It.

1071
01:24:55.560 --> 01:25:00.359
Swear me to secrecy, don't tell her. She'd tell me off,

1072
01:25:01.880 --> 01:25:05.520
I'll be in trouble. It's like you're seventy eight years old,

1073
01:25:05.520 --> 01:25:08.000
which mean you'd be in trouble. You can literally do

1074
01:25:08.039 --> 01:25:12.079
pretty much anything you want and get away with it,

1075
01:25:12.199 --> 01:25:15.319
you know, within a reason. And just like, oh sorry,

1076
01:25:15.399 --> 01:25:19.560
I'm old. I didn't realize what I was doing. Oh sorry,

1077
01:25:21.239 --> 01:25:27.000
he's evening in hospital. It's like, well, when something happened,

1078
01:25:27.319 --> 01:25:31.680
don't tell her, don't tell her, don't tell her. It's like,

1079
01:25:31.840 --> 01:25:34.800
what do you mean, don't tell her? Well, she's on holiday's,

1080
01:25:35.319 --> 01:25:38.520
she's she's it was her birthday today, and I don't

1081
01:25:38.520 --> 01:25:41.399
want her to be upset. I mean, this is when

1082
01:25:41.479 --> 01:25:45.520
he was given some really really bad news I don't

1083
01:25:45.520 --> 01:25:48.680
tell her. Don't let her know because she's her birthday

1084
01:25:48.720 --> 01:25:52.439
today and I don't want to ruin her birthday. So

1085
01:25:52.720 --> 01:26:00.680
I kept my promise and he told her days later.

1086
01:26:03.520 --> 01:26:07.399
It turns out it wasn't her birthday. Her birthday was

1087
01:26:07.439 --> 01:26:14.279
like three weeks ago, and she was I think she's

1088
01:26:14.319 --> 01:26:16.199
a little bit annoyed at me because I didn't tell her.

1089
01:26:16.760 --> 01:26:19.279
But he probably he'd like, Eve like, don't tell her.

1090
01:26:19.319 --> 01:26:22.359
If you tell her, I know you told her, Oh yeah,

1091
01:26:22.359 --> 01:26:25.319
but she needs to know you've he's only know he'd

1092
01:26:25.359 --> 01:26:27.119
known me for ten years, but he'd known her for

1093
01:26:27.159 --> 01:26:33.119
a lot longer. And I don't tell her if you

1094
01:26:33.199 --> 01:26:35.359
had it like a bit of difficulty during the night,

1095
01:26:36.079 --> 01:26:43.520
don't tell her. It's between me and you. What in

1096
01:26:43.600 --> 01:26:49.840
the end? I mean, I say in the end. But

1097
01:26:50.079 --> 01:26:52.800
after a couple of weeks of this, I just decided

1098
01:26:52.880 --> 01:26:55.520
just to tell her stuff. I said, Oh, this is

1099
01:26:55.520 --> 01:26:59.600
something else he told me not to tell you, And

1100
01:26:59.640 --> 01:27:03.880
it's because sometimes she say to me, yeah, he said

1101
01:27:03.920 --> 01:27:06.800
the same to me, don't tell you. So he's tell

1102
01:27:06.880 --> 01:27:08.840
us a both say the same thing and then saying

1103
01:27:08.880 --> 01:27:16.159
don't tell them. Don't tell Jason what happened? So yeah,

1104
01:27:16.239 --> 01:27:20.399
it's weird when I talk about I'm missing it's such

1105
01:27:20.439 --> 01:27:26.279
a character really, And I nearly made a podcast episode

1106
01:27:26.359 --> 01:27:30.039
with him, and he wants to do something in the hospital,

1107
01:27:31.880 --> 01:27:34.760
and I thought it'd be good to do. But then

1108
01:27:34.960 --> 01:27:38.399
I also knew that we were going to be interrupted continuously,

1109
01:27:39.439 --> 01:27:42.119
which is not anyone's fault. It's just you know, the

1110
01:27:42.119 --> 01:27:49.760
hospital wasn't there as a recording studio for me and him.

1111
01:27:49.920 --> 01:27:52.199
And then also I said, well, yeah, I can bring

1112
01:27:52.239 --> 01:27:55.039
a recorder in and we can do something. He said, well,

1113
01:27:55.119 --> 01:27:58.439
go home and write a script. I said, I don't.

1114
01:27:58.640 --> 01:28:01.800
I don't write scripts for these let me boy the

1115
01:28:01.840 --> 01:28:05.760
Sleep podcast. I just he said, oh, come on, put

1116
01:28:05.760 --> 01:28:08.399
your head, put your thinking head on. It's like, I'm

1117
01:28:08.439 --> 01:28:12.720
not words or gummage. Go on, you can, you can.

1118
01:28:13.600 --> 01:28:16.880
But it was like, really, it's almost like it was

1119
01:28:16.880 --> 01:28:22.279
in the middle of being rude and being complimentary at

1120
01:28:22.319 --> 01:28:28.319
the same time. So on one level saying pull your

1121
01:28:28.319 --> 01:28:30.840
finger out, just put a bit of effort in, but

1122
01:28:30.880 --> 01:28:34.479
at the same time saying you can do it. You can.

1123
01:28:34.560 --> 01:28:37.000
You can write a very clever script and then make

1124
01:28:37.039 --> 01:28:41.560
it funny. And it's like, that's not how I do things.

1125
01:28:42.399 --> 01:28:44.520
It has to be organic and it has to be

1126
01:28:45.640 --> 01:28:52.520
just go with it and see what happens. And that

1127
01:28:52.720 --> 01:29:00.279
was I mean literally the last time we talked about

1128
01:29:00.319 --> 01:29:04.560
that was just before I got COVID and had to

1129
01:29:04.560 --> 01:29:06.359
have a week off, and when I came back, he

1130
01:29:06.399 --> 01:29:12.760
was asleep all the time. So I kind of just

1131
01:29:12.800 --> 01:29:15.239
wish i'd just done it. I pulled it in and

1132
01:29:15.319 --> 01:29:19.000
said to him, look, I'll just edit it or do it.

1133
01:29:19.159 --> 01:29:23.159
Just talk about your life, talk about you know whatever,

1134
01:29:23.920 --> 01:29:28.960
just so that because at this point I've been talking

1135
01:29:29.000 --> 01:29:33.680
about him, you know, since he since he went in there,

1136
01:29:34.039 --> 01:29:39.000
I've been talking about him, and I kind of feel

1137
01:29:39.039 --> 01:29:42.439
that maybe some listeners get a sense of what he

1138
01:29:42.600 --> 01:29:51.000
was like, and you know, but it'd be I think

1139
01:29:51.039 --> 01:29:55.479
it'd be nice to have a voice to listen to, to

1140
01:29:55.359 --> 01:30:09.119
hear him, you know. Yeah, Oh well, how do you

1141
01:30:09.199 --> 01:30:12.720
think about that? With like Luke, I didn't have his voice.

1142
01:30:12.800 --> 01:30:18.279
And I had one video of him with Andre always

1143
01:30:18.319 --> 01:30:20.800
he with Vinnie. I don't know, but he was I

1144
01:30:20.840 --> 01:30:23.560
think it might have been Vinnie, and that he was

1145
01:30:23.600 --> 01:30:25.920
there and he was like playing with him and stuff,

1146
01:30:26.119 --> 01:30:28.640
and I had some videos of him with Andre and

1147
01:30:28.720 --> 01:30:32.319
pictures and stuff, but I didn't really have his voice

1148
01:30:32.359 --> 01:30:36.159
on there. I had nothing of his voice on and

1149
01:30:36.199 --> 01:30:39.239
there's a specific reason for that, because he didn't want

1150
01:30:40.079 --> 01:30:42.840
He never wanted to be on camera, didn't want me

1151
01:30:42.920 --> 01:30:47.760
filming him or recording him. I said to him, why

1152
01:30:47.760 --> 01:30:51.039
don't we just do a podcast, you know, one time,

1153
01:30:51.239 --> 01:30:54.840
just like just a one off. No, one hundred percent

1154
01:30:55.279 --> 01:30:57.920
did not want It's almost that he didn't want any

1155
01:30:57.960 --> 01:31:05.960
record of himself on any type of digital format. And

1156
01:31:06.000 --> 01:31:09.600
it's a shame because it would have been nice because

1157
01:31:09.600 --> 01:31:15.439
the thing about him and Uncle Sausages when they smiled,

1158
01:31:16.119 --> 01:31:22.319
they really smiled, you know. It was as you could

1159
01:31:22.319 --> 01:31:24.760
say that about anyone really couldn't, I suppose, But there

1160
01:31:24.840 --> 01:31:29.479
was a there was a brightness to it. There was

1161
01:31:29.520 --> 01:31:35.239
a real uplift to their smile that was genuine. It

1162
01:31:35.319 --> 01:31:39.079
was never fake. I never saw Luke put a fake

1163
01:31:39.159 --> 01:31:43.479
smile on the whole time, and knew him and Uncle

1164
01:31:43.520 --> 01:31:47.479
Sausages are the same. You know, it didn't have to.

1165
01:31:48.279 --> 01:31:50.560
They were never in scenarios where they had to put

1166
01:31:50.560 --> 01:31:54.880
on a fake smile. So when they did smile, I

1167
01:31:54.880 --> 01:31:57.600
mean Uncle Sausages was smiling a lot because he loved sport.

1168
01:31:57.800 --> 01:32:07.199
He's always excited about the next sporting event Luke. He

1169
01:32:07.359 --> 01:32:13.159
smiled when it was just genuinely a smile, if that

1170
01:32:13.239 --> 01:32:21.000
makes sense. The one thing that Uncle sausages. I noticed

1171
01:32:21.000 --> 01:32:23.680
this when I was in hospital. Actually it wasn't only

1172
01:32:24.000 --> 01:32:27.600
I noticed it, probably because last year we got a

1173
01:32:27.600 --> 01:32:36.800
lot closer the last year anyway, And I noticed that

1174
01:32:36.840 --> 01:32:39.000
when he looked at me sometimes he reminded me of

1175
01:32:39.000 --> 01:32:42.640
my Nan. His eyes. He had the sort of same

1176
01:32:42.720 --> 01:32:44.920
kind of look in his eyes, like smiley eyes that

1177
01:32:45.000 --> 01:32:50.840
my Nan had. And I noticed that in hospital that

1178
01:32:50.960 --> 01:32:53.079
he had he had that look, and he kept reminding

1179
01:32:53.159 --> 01:32:58.359
me of my Nan, that kind of looking up at

1180
01:32:58.439 --> 01:33:03.680
me with that smile. The eyes. It didn't need to

1181
01:33:03.680 --> 01:33:06.119
be smile of his face, it's his eyes were smiling.

1182
01:33:07.279 --> 01:33:16.760
And yeah, yeah, So I had my breakfast, came back,

1183
01:33:18.920 --> 01:33:22.119
gave Viny the sausage. He didn't want it. It was

1184
01:33:22.640 --> 01:33:29.920
really grumpy. He turned his nose up at it was

1185
01:33:30.000 --> 01:33:33.479
that many thing. I don't want that. So I literally

1186
01:33:33.600 --> 01:33:37.359
stole the sausage from the restaurant for him, put it

1187
01:33:37.359 --> 01:33:42.039
in a napkin to be It wasn't really stealing, because

1188
01:33:42.039 --> 01:33:45.359
I've been very loud of it, Like I can't believe

1189
01:33:45.399 --> 01:33:51.079
I've never stole a sausage before I paid for the sausage.

1190
01:33:51.199 --> 01:33:53.880
I don't think it's really stealing, is it. I don't

1191
01:33:53.920 --> 01:33:59.880
think so. If you go into McDonald's and you shove

1192
01:34:00.680 --> 01:34:09.119
you got a quarter pounder with cheese, fries and and McMuffin,

1193
01:34:11.279 --> 01:34:15.239
and you shoved the McMuffin down your pants, it's not steel,

1194
01:34:15.279 --> 01:34:24.159
is it, because you bought it already. So I bought

1195
01:34:24.199 --> 01:34:27.840
the sausage back and he didn't want it. He had

1196
01:34:27.880 --> 01:34:30.039
the help with me. He really was grumpy with me,

1197
01:34:32.399 --> 01:34:34.920
so I had I didn't have anything to eat, so

1198
01:34:35.159 --> 01:34:38.920
I wasn't hungry at that point. I sat down for

1199
01:34:38.960 --> 01:34:40.840
a little while and then I went to bed, had

1200
01:34:40.840 --> 01:34:43.600
a idea did to go and never lie down. So

1201
01:34:43.640 --> 01:34:45.640
he came into the bedroom me still didn't want a

1202
01:34:45.680 --> 01:34:49.960
sausage because I bought the sausage into the bedroom with me.

1203
01:34:52.239 --> 01:34:55.199
And so when I go into the bedroom, I take

1204
01:34:55.239 --> 01:34:57.359
his food and his water in the bedroom with me

1205
01:34:58.039 --> 01:35:00.239
and I bring it back in here. So wherever whatever

1206
01:35:00.359 --> 01:35:02.279
room we're in, I make sure it's always goes water

1207
01:35:02.359 --> 01:35:07.800
in his food. And I was probably had about half

1208
01:35:07.880 --> 01:35:11.279
hour an hour little kip for about half hour to

1209
01:35:11.319 --> 01:35:20.119
an hour, maybe an hour listening to some music Radio three.

1210
01:35:20.319 --> 01:35:24.439
It is my go to at the moment. A lot

1211
01:35:24.439 --> 01:35:30.840
of classical sound music on the orchestras and stuff like that.

1212
01:35:31.640 --> 01:35:38.560
And I've really kind of fallen in love with Chindler's

1213
01:35:38.600 --> 01:35:43.720
List album, the music for the movie. It's something about

1214
01:35:43.760 --> 01:35:45.079
that do Do.

1215
01:35:44.640 --> 01:35:48.199
Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do Do.

1216
01:35:47.880 --> 01:35:50.399
Do Do Do Do Do.

1217
01:35:50.159 --> 01:35:52.960
Do Do Do Do Do do do.

1218
01:35:55.000 --> 01:35:58.880
Oh. It's chips. It's chips. I don't know. I can't

1219
01:35:58.880 --> 01:36:01.279
remember what the song is, but it's it's a good song.

1220
01:36:02.479 --> 01:36:11.680
And I still think the bon Jovi's greatest song. While

1221
01:36:11.680 --> 01:36:14.800
we're talking about songs, bon Jovi's great song was Living

1222
01:36:14.800 --> 01:36:18.039
on a Prayer because that was out at the same

1223
01:36:18.039 --> 01:36:20.720
time as The Final Countdown by Europe. I do believe

1224
01:36:21.840 --> 01:36:26.520
it's the Final Cowtown because I used that in a joke.

1225
01:36:30.279 --> 01:36:34.760
It's kind of ruined because I've said it. But when

1226
01:36:34.800 --> 01:36:37.640
I was doing my last job, they were making loads

1227
01:36:37.640 --> 01:36:41.279
of redundancies and stuff like that, and that the man

1228
01:36:42.000 --> 01:36:45.640
who was representing the company, the financial company that just

1229
01:36:45.760 --> 01:36:48.680
bought the company I was working for, they didn't know

1230
01:36:48.680 --> 01:36:50.640
what they were going to do with it. They were

1231
01:36:50.640 --> 01:36:53.359
looking for buyers and they just bought it for the money.

1232
01:36:53.479 --> 01:36:58.039
You bought it for the probably the building and whatever else.

1233
01:36:59.079 --> 01:37:03.159
So he said, well, we're going to try and get

1234
01:37:03.199 --> 01:37:08.439
a buyer for this insurance company. We're going to be

1235
01:37:08.439 --> 01:37:10.159
splitting things up, but we're going to try and get

1236
01:37:10.159 --> 01:37:17.359
a buyer for the for the car insurance side. But

1237
01:37:18.039 --> 01:37:19.920
what we're going to do, we'll be honest with you. You know,

1238
01:37:20.399 --> 01:37:25.840
we don't know what's going to happen. And he said,

1239
01:37:27.359 --> 01:37:31.399
but we want to stay positive. We appreciate you, and

1240
01:37:31.720 --> 01:37:35.439
you know all that stuff. And he played a little

1241
01:37:35.520 --> 01:37:41.119
video like showing the company that he belonged to, because

1242
01:37:41.159 --> 01:37:44.119
they were like one of these acquisition companies, so they'd

1243
01:37:44.119 --> 01:37:47.119
buy something and sometimes they just all they do is

1244
01:37:47.119 --> 01:37:51.439
because they wanted the business, the customers, and then they

1245
01:37:51.439 --> 01:37:58.560
could just sell those customers to a different insurance company.

1246
01:37:59.159 --> 01:38:01.239
So he had this it's like little video, this is

1247
01:38:01.279 --> 01:38:04.760
what we do, and this is you know, and then

1248
01:38:04.800 --> 01:38:10.279
he said he played some music and he said, well

1249
01:38:11.039 --> 01:38:12.720
we're going to end this now. We going to end

1250
01:38:12.720 --> 01:38:16.680
this little session because they shut all the phones off

1251
01:38:16.680 --> 01:38:19.279
and everything. So it was probably about one hundred and

1252
01:38:19.279 --> 01:38:22.520
fifty of us in there, maybe less, I don't maybe

1253
01:38:22.520 --> 01:38:26.119
one hundred and fifty, maybe one hundred, I don't know.

1254
01:38:26.159 --> 01:38:31.239
I didn't count everyone. And he had this CD player

1255
01:38:31.279 --> 01:38:35.720
and he said, so we just we'll end this now

1256
01:38:35.800 --> 01:38:40.079
with a song, and what would be a suitable song

1257
01:38:40.960 --> 01:38:44.359
to end this little session with? And I shouted out

1258
01:38:44.520 --> 01:38:51.800
the final countdown? And it got a good laugh because

1259
01:38:51.840 --> 01:38:54.359
it was like, you know, it was the final countdown

1260
01:38:54.399 --> 01:38:59.560
for the company, literally because I did close. He didn't

1261
01:38:59.560 --> 01:39:06.079
find it funny, and neither did my supervisor. But I

1262
01:39:06.119 --> 01:39:09.159
thought it was quite quick of me, bearing in mind

1263
01:39:09.239 --> 01:39:11.479
the situation. I think it was a scenario. I think

1264
01:39:11.479 --> 01:39:18.359
I was quite quick, but it was ruined by me

1265
01:39:18.399 --> 01:39:21.039
telling you right at the beginning pretty much that I

1266
01:39:21.079 --> 01:39:23.960
was going to shout out it was the final countdown,

1267
01:39:23.960 --> 01:39:27.920
because I've already mentioned it. But living on a prayer,

1268
01:39:30.279 --> 01:39:35.279
I mean, bon jovid. Did they really became absolutely massive

1269
01:39:35.319 --> 01:39:40.760
in the early nineties, didn't they like huge axel rows?

1270
01:39:40.880 --> 01:39:44.560
It was like the biggest thing in the world. But

1271
01:39:44.600 --> 01:39:49.680
I still think like a prayer in nineteen eighty five,

1272
01:39:50.039 --> 01:39:56.600
was it still the best thing they did? So good,

1273
01:39:56.800 --> 01:40:02.560
such a great song. In fact, I don't even remember

1274
01:40:02.560 --> 01:40:11.720
anything they did in the nineties. Don't you give love

1275
01:40:11.760 --> 01:40:16.520
a bad name. That was also in the eighties, but

1276
01:40:16.600 --> 01:40:19.479
they were like a supergroup, weren't They are absolutely massive

1277
01:40:19.479 --> 01:40:28.640
in the nineties. Huh. And then I got up, I

1278
01:40:28.680 --> 01:40:34.600
took Vinny for another wander around the park. Oh yeah,

1279
01:40:35.319 --> 01:40:39.920
that's when we're going through the field. It's a cornfield,

1280
01:40:40.119 --> 01:40:44.119
united sweet corn on a cop sweet corn. They're growing

1281
01:40:44.159 --> 01:40:53.640
sweet corn. I'm talking millions of sweet corns, probably hundreds

1282
01:40:53.680 --> 01:40:58.760
of thousands of sweet corns, maybe millions, I don't know.

1283
01:40:58.920 --> 01:41:02.000
It's too many to count or too many for me

1284
01:41:02.039 --> 01:41:05.880
to count. And they're like four or five fields, absolutely

1285
01:41:06.000 --> 01:41:09.720
huge amounts. And I didn't know it was a sweet corn,

1286
01:41:11.079 --> 01:41:13.199
and I saw one on the floor. I said, what

1287
01:41:13.239 --> 01:41:16.680
if someone dropped a sweet corn on the floor? And

1288
01:41:16.720 --> 01:41:21.119
I saw that what it is is someone had clearly

1289
01:41:21.199 --> 01:41:25.399
just picked one off and stripped it off, and it

1290
01:41:25.439 --> 01:41:33.039
wasn't ripe, but it was definitely a sweet corn. And

1291
01:41:33.079 --> 01:41:35.560
I'm thinking, how much did this sweet corns cost in

1292
01:41:35.560 --> 01:41:39.359
the shop? About two pounds per sweet corn or something.

1293
01:41:41.239 --> 01:41:48.119
And I'm literally walking through a field millions of pounds

1294
01:41:48.119 --> 01:41:54.840
worth of sweet corns, and it was just really for

1295
01:41:54.880 --> 01:41:57.640
the first time, it's really weird because I've never really

1296
01:41:57.640 --> 01:42:01.800
felt that way about because I don't know much about crops.

1297
01:42:01.840 --> 01:42:04.359
I don't know much about you know, what things are worth.

1298
01:42:06.960 --> 01:42:09.840
But I do like sweet corns, and I know that

1299
01:42:09.880 --> 01:42:18.279
they're not cheap until literally just pass thousands. I can

1300
01:42:18.399 --> 01:42:21.600
just put my hand out and touch thousands as I

1301
01:42:21.680 --> 01:42:32.159
walked up a sweet corns, and I'm like, hmm, but

1302
01:42:32.199 --> 01:42:35.560
I'm thinking when they're right, maybe I'll just take a

1303
01:42:35.600 --> 01:42:43.600
few for myself and maybe the rest of the country

1304
01:42:44.239 --> 01:42:46.800
take all of them. Maybe just maybe just take one

1305
01:42:46.840 --> 01:42:51.399
and see if it's if, you know, if I'm able

1306
01:42:51.399 --> 01:42:56.319
to actually eat it, and if i am, then next

1307
01:42:56.439 --> 01:42:59.319
year I'll do the same thing and just maybe put

1308
01:42:59.319 --> 01:43:03.560
a few in the free or something. I mean, is

1309
01:43:03.600 --> 01:43:08.439
it stealing, it's technically it's it's coming out of the earth,

1310
01:43:09.920 --> 01:43:13.800
our earth that we all share, and it's in a

1311
01:43:13.840 --> 01:43:22.119
public place. I don't know, is it It's not that

1312
01:43:22.159 --> 01:43:25.079
I want to I mean to me, is that any

1313
01:43:25.119 --> 01:43:32.239
different from just taking raspberries, you know, picking raspberries or

1314
01:43:33.680 --> 01:43:36.319
take you know, picking bananas off a tree or apples

1315
01:43:36.359 --> 01:43:41.119
off a tree. I mean, there's this tree, it's an

1316
01:43:41.199 --> 01:43:47.239
apple tree in the park. It's inside someone's garden, but

1317
01:43:47.279 --> 01:43:50.119
there's a fence, so half the apples are dropping on

1318
01:43:50.119 --> 01:43:55.199
the field. You're on the park every day. I'd say

1319
01:43:55.199 --> 01:44:02.479
probably at least ten fifteen twenty apple falling down. I'm

1320
01:44:02.520 --> 01:44:05.159
exaggerating for a fact, but a good few at least,

1321
01:44:07.439 --> 01:44:11.920
probably a handful a bowl full of apples falling down

1322
01:44:12.439 --> 01:44:17.439
into the park. It's free apples. What do I do?

1323
01:44:17.479 --> 01:44:25.680
I kicked them. I kicked them. I kicked them, and

1324
01:44:25.720 --> 01:44:28.640
then I forget how to say the word kicked them

1325
01:44:28.760 --> 01:44:34.000
or the sentence I kick him along because Vinnie loves

1326
01:44:34.079 --> 01:44:39.840
chasing them and he eats them. And for some reason,

1327
01:44:39.960 --> 01:44:46.920
because they're in a tree, I kind of think, oh,

1328
01:44:47.079 --> 01:44:52.600
there's gotta be something wrong with them. But the fact

1329
01:44:52.760 --> 01:44:55.760
is they're falling out of the tree because they're ripe

1330
01:44:55.960 --> 01:45:00.880
and they're ready. It's nothing's forced am out of the tree.

1331
01:45:01.359 --> 01:45:04.000
It's not being it wasn't windy or anything. It's just

1332
01:45:04.479 --> 01:45:07.239
it's time for them to fall out. And I could

1333
01:45:07.239 --> 01:45:11.000
have literally just picked them up, brought them home and

1334
01:45:11.039 --> 01:45:15.720
eaten them, clean them off first, got with the skin,

1335
01:45:16.439 --> 01:45:19.920
because you know, check make sure there's nothing in them.

1336
01:45:19.920 --> 01:45:26.239
But I could have had an apple, I could have

1337
01:45:26.239 --> 01:45:29.199
put more in the freeze freezer with my sweet corn.

1338
01:45:31.279 --> 01:45:33.399
Put in the freezer with a sweet corn. I must

1339
01:45:33.439 --> 01:45:41.840
have a huge freezer. I did see these these sweet corns.

1340
01:45:43.359 --> 01:45:50.399
I would say that about ten fifteen foot high. Not

1341
01:45:50.439 --> 01:45:56.560
the sweet corns themselves, but the the plants really way

1342
01:45:56.720 --> 01:46:01.880
way taller than me. Maybe not fifty but probably good

1343
01:46:01.960 --> 01:46:07.720
ten foot i'd say, yeah, well taller than me. A

1344
01:46:07.720 --> 01:46:14.880
lot taller than me, and I'm eight foot. So it's

1345
01:46:15.000 --> 01:46:18.000
quite a good place for animals to sort of hang

1346
01:46:18.039 --> 01:46:20.720
out and hide. And the other day I saw a

1347
01:46:20.760 --> 01:46:24.800
bambi run through, like run right out of one and

1348
01:46:24.840 --> 01:46:27.720
then into another one out of one field and into

1349
01:46:27.760 --> 01:46:34.640
another field because they're like really close together. Made me jump,

1350
01:46:34.680 --> 01:46:47.600
it did. That's the whole story. There isn't anything else.

1351
01:46:48.600 --> 01:46:56.560
I can't see nothing else. That was everything. Sorry. Sorry.

1352
01:46:57.000 --> 01:47:03.479
Then I came home again, had those deliveries. I also

1353
01:47:03.600 --> 01:47:12.640
got a few grocery deliveries between two and four, but

1354
01:47:12.720 --> 01:47:16.199
they weren't groceries. It was but it was just like

1355
01:47:16.319 --> 01:47:20.640
bottles of water, some breakfast cereals, and a couple of

1356
01:47:20.680 --> 01:47:26.920
packets of villeage treats. No food. I mean breakfast cereal

1357
01:47:26.960 --> 01:47:30.600
is food, but no food food. I got my fridge

1358
01:47:30.680 --> 01:47:33.359
is empty apart from milk. I've got some milk as well.

1359
01:47:33.920 --> 01:47:38.159
So I with the milk, some butter and some margarine

1360
01:47:38.560 --> 01:47:41.199
and half a tin of dog food. There's nothing in

1361
01:47:41.199 --> 01:47:52.119
my fridge. Loads of breakfast cereal. Yeah, so what I'll

1362
01:47:52.159 --> 01:47:54.640
do tomorrow i''ll have to try and get some groceries

1363
01:47:54.680 --> 01:48:03.039
and mutual food in. I'll figure that out tomorrow. I

1364
01:48:03.039 --> 01:48:07.119
could get something tonight, but I don't need to. I

1365
01:48:07.159 --> 01:48:08.800
don't need to get anything. I've got enough for my

1366
01:48:08.840 --> 01:48:16.680
breakfast in the morning. Yeah, that's fine, and I have

1367
01:48:16.720 --> 01:48:20.079
some breakfast. I have a bowl of breakfast cereal now

1368
01:48:20.680 --> 01:48:23.880
because I had a cooked breakfast earlier, cooked dinner whatever,

1369
01:48:26.359 --> 01:48:33.479
and it's more. I'll probably order get some I don't know,

1370
01:48:34.960 --> 01:48:38.319
I don't I'm not sure, but get a few groceries

1371
01:48:38.960 --> 01:48:46.159
to get them delivered tomorrow morning when I'm up and

1372
01:48:46.199 --> 01:48:51.520
that and then then I did this recording. And that's

1373
01:48:51.560 --> 01:48:57.239
that's kind of what I've done today. Although the council

1374
01:48:57.279 --> 01:48:59.319
called me yesterday to say have I got the key?

1375
01:48:59.640 --> 01:49:02.560
I still got the key to Uncle Sausages Flat And

1376
01:49:02.600 --> 01:49:04.960
I said yeah, And I said, you're going to bring

1377
01:49:04.960 --> 01:49:10.479
it into us to the office. I said, no, that's

1378
01:49:10.600 --> 01:49:13.479
like that's going to cost people forty quid to get

1379
01:49:13.520 --> 01:49:16.319
them back. It's like, no, I'm not proud not doing that.

1380
01:49:16.800 --> 01:49:18.840
I said, you want the key, come and get it.

1381
01:49:19.960 --> 01:49:22.840
Or I'd said I can do I can just leave

1382
01:49:22.880 --> 01:49:25.680
the key in the door in the lock, you know,

1383
01:49:25.760 --> 01:49:28.359
for you, so then when you come around you can

1384
01:49:28.399 --> 01:49:31.039
just let yourself in. And she said, no, I can't

1385
01:49:31.079 --> 01:49:37.800
do that because someone might come in and basically, what

1386
01:49:37.840 --> 01:49:44.159
do they call it? Live there for free? I said, well,

1387
01:49:44.399 --> 01:49:47.600
it's up to you. But and then she said, if

1388
01:49:47.600 --> 01:49:49.560
you entered it, if you if you cleared all the

1389
01:49:49.600 --> 01:49:54.279
stuff out. I said no, no, because I did try,

1390
01:49:54.319 --> 01:49:56.079
and at first of all, I was told that we

1391
01:49:56.159 --> 01:49:58.720
needed to do that. So I offered to help to

1392
01:49:59.560 --> 01:50:01.920
bags stuff up put it outside, and I did. I

1393
01:50:01.960 --> 01:50:07.920
did about fifty sixty bags, and then when I was

1394
01:50:07.920 --> 01:50:10.720
a little bit unwell, I went in there just and

1395
01:50:11.239 --> 01:50:14.760
bagged up and put about another fifty bags of stuff.

1396
01:50:15.760 --> 01:50:21.279
So I've cleared most of the stuff apart from the furniture,

1397
01:50:21.840 --> 01:50:24.840
so most of it is actually bagged up. I've left

1398
01:50:24.840 --> 01:50:28.479
about fifty bags in there, and the council can come

1399
01:50:28.479 --> 01:50:32.279
and take that. The reason I didn't put those outside

1400
01:50:32.319 --> 01:50:34.039
is because the council told me I didn't need to.

1401
01:50:34.800 --> 01:50:36.920
They said, I don't worry about it, we'll sort it out.

1402
01:50:38.199 --> 01:50:39.960
And then she calls up and says, have I done it?

1403
01:50:40.079 --> 01:50:46.520
Like no? So and then the council they were here

1404
01:50:46.720 --> 01:50:55.520
today emptying the flat downstairs, and I went down. I said,

1405
01:50:56.319 --> 01:50:59.760
I just checking. Do you want the key for of

1406
01:50:59.760 --> 01:51:05.640
course sausages flat? And they said no. I said, I'm

1407
01:51:05.680 --> 01:51:08.880
just asking because the council phone yesterday and they said,

1408
01:51:08.880 --> 01:51:11.800
you're going to be coming around and she said no.

1409
01:51:11.960 --> 01:51:14.560
He said, I don't know anything about it. I said, okay,

1410
01:51:14.560 --> 01:51:19.479
I don't worry. So it might be a different crew

1411
01:51:19.720 --> 01:51:23.760
that come around next week or tomorrow, whenever they come,

1412
01:51:24.039 --> 01:51:26.760
I don't know. But I can't guarantee I'm going to

1413
01:51:26.760 --> 01:51:29.920
be in It's not that I go out a lot,

1414
01:51:29.960 --> 01:51:32.279
but I might, you know, I might be in bed,

1415
01:51:32.600 --> 01:51:39.640
might be asleep, I might be taking Vinie to the park.

1416
01:51:41.520 --> 01:51:43.439
So yeah, it's not that I'm going to be out

1417
01:51:43.560 --> 01:51:51.359
raving reval revol Tell me. Tell me I got Buddy

1418
01:51:51.399 --> 01:51:59.079
Holly in my head recently. Do you ever like sit

1419
01:51:59.159 --> 01:52:03.439
around thinking? I wonder what Buddy Holly would have done

1420
01:52:04.479 --> 01:52:11.520
if he'd been around for a long time, you know,

1421
01:52:11.600 --> 01:52:14.720
because he was young. He's like twenty two years old.

1422
01:52:14.760 --> 01:52:18.920
I think when he kind of he did his fame

1423
01:52:19.000 --> 01:52:25.880
and he was gone, and he was so prolific in

1424
01:52:26.039 --> 01:52:29.800
such a short time. Imagine what he could have accomplished

1425
01:52:29.840 --> 01:52:39.239
between by the time he got to thirty. Musically, he

1426
01:52:39.279 --> 01:52:46.039
could have been I just he could have been the

1427
01:52:46.119 --> 01:52:47.880
big I mean he was big, but he could have

1428
01:52:47.960 --> 01:52:52.399
been like but you think now, I mean he'd been

1429
01:52:52.479 --> 01:52:56.560
his Wow. So he was in his early twenties, in

1430
01:52:56.600 --> 01:53:06.439
the fifties, maybe it's nineties now, I guess, but he

1431
01:53:07.359 --> 01:53:09.960
might have been a lot of starting in this one today.

1432
01:53:09.960 --> 01:53:13.520
Have you noticed that he might have been like the

1433
01:53:13.560 --> 01:53:19.319
most prolific songwriter of all time. There's a few really

1434
01:53:19.319 --> 01:53:25.600
prolific songwriters, but he might have been the number one. Wow.

1435
01:53:31.079 --> 01:53:35.279
I remember, like in the nineties, I serenaded a lady

1436
01:53:35.439 --> 01:53:47.520
that I met and I sung true Love Ways. She said,

1437
01:53:47.520 --> 01:53:52.920
I really, I said, are you I'm not going to

1438
01:53:52.920 --> 01:53:57.600
be rude of I said, I said, so, I'm never

1439
01:53:57.600 --> 01:54:01.159
really sure when a woman's turned on. And she said,

1440
01:54:01.199 --> 01:54:06.439
you know what I'm turned on? I said why? She said, well,

1441
01:54:06.479 --> 01:54:11.000
you know, if I'm enjoying. I like getting serenaded too,

1442
01:54:14.359 --> 01:54:17.479
And when I was serenaded too, that turns me on

1443
01:54:17.520 --> 01:54:21.079
more than anything in the world. I said, really. She

1444
01:54:21.119 --> 01:54:27.079
said yeah, so I someun true love ways to her.

1445
01:54:29.720 --> 01:54:33.479
Never saw her again after that, I mean after I

1446
01:54:33.520 --> 01:54:40.159
saund the song, she said, I get out. I thought

1447
01:54:40.159 --> 01:54:45.479
it went quite well. I saw her a few years later,

1448
01:54:46.000 --> 01:54:49.640
right because she was like on around the comedy scene,

1449
01:54:50.199 --> 01:54:56.439
and I said, do you remember that night? She said yeah.

1450
01:54:56.640 --> 01:54:58.880
I said, what did I do wrong? He said, you

1451
01:54:59.079 --> 01:55:05.119
liked buddy Hole and you're like being serenaded. She said yeah.

1452
01:55:05.760 --> 01:55:08.279
I said, what you didn't I sung it and then

1453
01:55:08.279 --> 01:55:11.239
you kind of didn't want me if you asked me

1454
01:55:11.279 --> 01:55:15.119
to leave sort of straight away, and she said yeah.

1455
01:55:15.319 --> 01:55:18.199
I said, well, I'm just wondering for the future. What

1456
01:55:18.359 --> 01:55:23.039
can I have done different? She said, well, it was

1457
01:55:23.079 --> 01:55:29.720
a nice song. I said yeah. She said it was

1458
01:55:29.800 --> 01:55:32.439
sung nicely. You know it's a song I like it

1459
01:55:32.680 --> 01:55:36.680
was sung nicely. I said, okay, So where did I

1460
01:55:36.720 --> 01:55:45.279
go wrong? She said the strip tease? If you didn't

1461
01:55:45.279 --> 01:55:48.239
need that, didn't need you to be stripping off while

1462
01:55:48.319 --> 01:55:53.960
singing it. I said, I can't know what strip tease is.

1463
01:55:54.720 --> 01:55:57.880
She said, also that attitude of yours okay, fair enough,

1464
01:55:59.399 --> 01:56:06.479
So learn something new. I try and learn something new

1465
01:56:06.520 --> 01:56:08.520
every day, but I don't try, but I think I

1466
01:56:08.560 --> 01:56:11.960
probably do learn something new. I don't know what I've

1467
01:56:12.039 --> 01:56:18.720
learned today. I think I'm trying to learn about myself.

1468
01:56:21.000 --> 01:56:23.479
How do I tick? Why do I tick? What I

1469
01:56:24.279 --> 01:56:32.960
really feel about things? Who am I really? Who am

1470
01:56:33.039 --> 01:56:39.359
I really? Where am I going? What am I doing?

1471
01:56:39.399 --> 01:56:45.880
And why? So On that note, this has been quite

1472
01:56:45.920 --> 01:56:50.239
a long recording, but I think I needed to do

1473
01:56:50.279 --> 01:56:52.640
a long recording because I haven't done one for a while.

1474
01:56:54.119 --> 01:56:57.479
Tomorrow I will be doing the Q and A Friday,

1475
01:56:58.439 --> 01:57:02.079
so there's still time. If you go to my Facebook group,

1476
01:57:02.319 --> 01:57:07.159
Jason Newland's Boring Group, there's a link on my website

1477
01:57:08.680 --> 01:57:14.000
you can leave me a question underneath the image that

1478
01:57:14.039 --> 01:57:17.960
I posted, which basically says, if you any questions for

1479
01:57:18.039 --> 01:57:20.720
this week's Q and A Friday, and there's a date,

1480
01:57:20.800 --> 01:57:26.199
which is the twenty ninth of August. There's a few

1481
01:57:26.279 --> 01:57:30.680
questions already, but you're welcome to add more. Ideally, I

1482
01:57:30.720 --> 01:57:36.359
would say try and do it before lunchtime UK time

1483
01:57:37.880 --> 01:57:41.760
tomorrow because I've got a tendency of donies normally in

1484
01:57:41.800 --> 01:57:51.159
about afternoon time, sometimes the morning. Generally maybe afternoon because

1485
01:57:51.199 --> 01:57:55.600
it's if it was just for like half hour forty

1486
01:57:55.600 --> 01:57:58.560
five minutes an hour, I might do it in the morning,

1487
01:57:58.600 --> 01:58:02.000
but because they longer recording the Q and A Fridays,

1488
01:58:02.920 --> 01:58:04.920
I generally I like to give myself a bit of

1489
01:58:05.000 --> 01:58:12.439
time and space. So that's me done for today. Thank

1490
01:58:12.479 --> 01:58:16.680
you for listening, and remember to be kind to yourself

1491
01:58:16.760 --> 01:58:28.680
because you do deserve to be happy. Lots of love. Bye.

1492
01:58:29.359 --> 01:58:43.960
Relax in a more deep and meaningful way, maybe in

1493
01:58:44.000 --> 01:58:49.560
a way that can not just allow you to feel

1494
01:58:50.920 --> 01:59:01.399
calmer now and throughout the time we've spend together here. Yeah,

1495
01:59:02.159 --> 01:59:07.880
not just relaxed at the end of the recording when

1496
01:59:07.880 --> 01:59:14.560
it's finished and you can enjoy that sense of comfort

1497
01:59:14.720 --> 01:59:29.640
and peace, but also I think it would be nice

1498
01:59:29.760 --> 01:59:49.560
to have those feelings of relaxation continue for longer after

1499
01:59:49.640 --> 02:00:00.000
the recording has ended, so that you can still benefit

1500
02:00:00.119 --> 02:00:09.600
it from listening to my voice maybe in a few

1501
02:00:09.640 --> 02:00:25.399
hours time, perhaps tomorrow, and then by listening regularly, especially

1502
02:00:25.479 --> 02:00:29.960
if you find like some people do and myself as well.

1503
02:00:30.119 --> 02:00:37.119
I sometimes I find one particular recording that really resonates

1504
02:00:37.159 --> 02:00:43.520
with me, and I just listen to it over and

1505
02:00:43.600 --> 02:00:56.960
over again every morning, every evening. There was this recording

1506
02:00:57.199 --> 02:01:03.600
from We're going back to about nineteen ninety nine. It

1507
02:01:03.680 --> 02:01:08.800
was it wasn't hypnosis, but it was a guided visualizations.

1508
02:01:08.920 --> 02:01:15.920
It kind of was hypnosis, really, and I managed to

1509
02:01:15.960 --> 02:01:19.479
find it again and it still has the same effect

1510
02:01:20.000 --> 02:01:31.640
on me. And part of it was the person's voice

1511
02:01:32.039 --> 02:01:42.239
relaxed me just felt so peaceful, and I'd look forward

1512
02:01:42.680 --> 02:01:49.359
to listening to her in the morning and in the evening,

1513
02:01:55.760 --> 02:02:04.760
and I knew before even pressing the place button that

1514
02:02:05.119 --> 02:02:09.520
since I've done that, pressed the play button. This is

1515
02:02:09.880 --> 02:02:20.840
in the days of CD players, pressed the play button,

1516
02:02:24.239 --> 02:02:27.159
ifact it might have even been a tape tape recorder.

1517
02:02:28.359 --> 02:02:36.760
I'd lie down on the bed and then even without

1518
02:02:37.279 --> 02:02:50.279
necessarily listening to her words because I had them memorized. Really,

1519
02:02:54.960 --> 02:03:00.920
it was as if my body knew exactly what to do,

1520
02:03:05.720 --> 02:03:27.560
and the muscles just almost went into automatic relaxation, and

1521
02:03:27.680 --> 02:03:41.680
I remember my mind would slow down. Now. Now, I

1522
02:03:41.720 --> 02:03:47.960
was listening to this recording in the early days of

1523
02:03:48.079 --> 02:03:58.800
learning hypnosis, and long before I ever made any videos

1524
02:03:58.880 --> 02:04:03.479
or audio record audens myself, because I didn't start doing

1525
02:04:03.520 --> 02:04:17.039
that till two thousand and six. But I knew. I

1526
02:04:17.119 --> 02:04:30.640
knew how helpful I found being able to just let go,

1527
02:04:33.640 --> 02:04:39.039
to have that trust in the person that I'm listening to,

1528
02:04:46.720 --> 02:04:54.800
knowing that it's going to be just as relaxing, if

1529
02:04:54.880 --> 02:05:00.159
not more so, each time you hear my voice. Yes,

1530
02:05:04.199 --> 02:05:15.800
you may feel the same. Some people have been listening

1531
02:05:15.840 --> 02:05:29.800
to me for over a decade, maybe not solidly, obviously

1532
02:05:29.840 --> 02:05:36.279
not twenty four hours a day, but maybe people come back.

1533
02:05:38.119 --> 02:05:53.159
Some people maybe listen every day. There's something that I

1534
02:05:53.239 --> 02:06:09.239
do which you may not realize by listening, is when

1535
02:06:09.520 --> 02:06:25.039
I record these recordings. Now, for example, I also am

1536
02:06:25.279 --> 02:06:39.079
affected by the words that I say. So if I

1537
02:06:39.079 --> 02:06:46.439
said to you, focus on your feet, notice your feet relaxing,

1538
02:06:49.960 --> 02:06:57.840
I will be focusing on my feet. I will be

1539
02:06:57.960 --> 02:07:16.039
noticing my feet relaxing. If I said, focus on your hands,

1540
02:07:18.840 --> 02:07:28.359
and maybe notice the difference between each hand, perhaps notice

1541
02:07:28.479 --> 02:07:34.560
that the air in the room, the temperature of the room,

1542
02:07:36.399 --> 02:07:46.800
on the backs of your hands. You may start to

1543
02:07:47.399 --> 02:07:55.439
notice what almost feels like a very light breeze, even

1544
02:07:55.520 --> 02:07:59.680
though there may not be any type of breeze at

1545
02:07:59.720 --> 02:08:12.760
all where you are right now. And as you become

1546
02:08:13.399 --> 02:08:27.800
aware of your hands, I'm also aware of how relaxed

1547
02:08:28.079 --> 02:08:51.840
my hands, our feeling now, and when it comes to

1548
02:08:53.399 --> 02:08:59.399
potentially drifting off to sleep, which may be the reason

1549
02:08:59.680 --> 02:09:16.039
you'll listening, I also feel drowsy when I make these recordings.

1550
02:09:20.720 --> 02:09:37.239
I also notice my mind drifting. In fact, at times

1551
02:09:39.159 --> 02:09:53.319
I've actually fallen asleep without even noticing, and then I

1552
02:09:53.479 --> 02:10:05.439
carry on talking. It's only when I listen back to

1553
02:10:05.479 --> 02:10:14.520
do the editing I hear snoring and I think, I

1554
02:10:14.520 --> 02:10:25.239
don't remember snoring. I remember talking. This snoring was a

1555
02:10:25.359 --> 02:10:31.600
pig turned up. That's why I sound like when I

1556
02:10:31.720 --> 02:10:50.439
snare and I get really into the whole experience. I

1557
02:10:50.479 --> 02:11:00.800
don't know how you feel, how relaxed you're feeling your feet,

1558
02:11:03.720 --> 02:11:26.600
how relaxed you feel in your hands. I have noticed

1559
02:11:29.199 --> 02:11:45.439
more and more that the more relaxed, deeper level of

1560
02:11:45.680 --> 02:12:02.920
comfort you feel, the easier your breathing becomes. It's almost

1561
02:12:03.279 --> 02:12:23.600
like that additional muscle relaxation. So this allows you the

1562
02:12:23.760 --> 02:12:50.159
breath easier without necessarily focusing on your breath. However, being

1563
02:12:50.239 --> 02:13:19.880
able to notice the ease in which you breathe so naturally,

1564
02:13:34.520 --> 02:14:17.279
you breathe so very easily and smoothly. Whenever I imagine my

1565
02:14:17.479 --> 02:14:33.840
breathing improving. When I've got my eyes closed, I tend

1566
02:14:33.920 --> 02:14:54.439
to visualize a beautiful field with trees and flowers producing

1567
02:14:54.560 --> 02:15:28.600
all that life giving oxygen. It feels nice to, if

1568
02:15:28.720 --> 02:15:59.399
nothing else, just taking some time away from everything, enjoying

1569
02:16:05.680 --> 02:16:56.879
that feeling of peace, serenity with a joyful heart. Time

1570
02:16:57.319 --> 02:17:22.040
seems to just to rip by, so very slowly, relaxed,

1571
02:17:27.920 --> 02:18:07.040
so deeply peaceful, completely unattached to any thoughts whatsoever in

1572
02:18:07.200 --> 02:19:11.639
this moment, completely free. Notice that your mind has slowed down,

1573
02:19:19.879 --> 02:20:06.600
slowed down because nothing really requires your attention. You can

1574
02:20:06.840 --> 02:20:24.000
enjoy the physical sensations of allowing the stress drip out

1575
02:20:24.040 --> 02:20:43.559
of your body, to appear out of every part of

1576
02:20:43.719 --> 02:21:08.280
your body, and being released from your brain in your

1577
02:21:08.399 --> 02:22:04.600
mind slowly but surely, the muscle singlax, relax y, r

1578
02:22:11.200 --> 02:22:57.399
really so very deeply, so deeply, and the feelings, the

1579
02:22:57.600 --> 02:23:22.239
pleasant feelings in your arm us and shoulders, deepening each

1580
02:23:22.639 --> 02:23:59.760
part of your body further and deeper and deeper. M

1581
02:24:00.079 --> 02:24:06.559
I to send the feelings in the back of your neck,

1582
02:24:29.639 --> 02:25:15.079
the feelings in your wrists, muscles, in front of your body.

1583
02:25:19.440 --> 02:26:02.959
I all say, feeling peaceful deeply, There's a sense of

1584
02:26:03.200 --> 02:26:12.159
peace spreads through your very core.

1585
02:26:42.680 --> 02:27:03.319
Even when you focus on your mind, the mind becomes.

1586
02:27:09.959 --> 02:28:32.799
Eve and slower, even deeper, relaxing, so very slow. His stomach,

1587
02:28:46.879 --> 02:29:34.600
PA's fallin's stomach, your back. Notice, Notice how relaxed you'd

1588
02:29:34.760 --> 02:30:13.120
never feel in the hole of your back. You spy

1589
02:30:17.200 --> 02:30:21.920
from your brain all the way down the middle of

1590
02:30:21.959 --> 02:30:41.680
your back, sending and receiving millions of messages every day,

1591
02:30:44.719 --> 02:31:02.600
deep comfort increasing deeplyy ries.

1592
02:31:32.360 --> 02:31:32.719
You n.

1593
02:31:58.760 --> 02:32:09.239
R yahm, spreading those signals down a spine or cord

1594
02:32:11.840 --> 02:32:30.719
into air every part of your body, your shins and

1595
02:32:30.840 --> 02:33:21.440
your calf muscles well el boes. Feelings of peace and

1596
02:33:21.600 --> 02:33:39.600
tranquility spreading through your body, tips of your toes, to

1597
02:33:39.760 --> 02:33:51.799
your eyes, your fingers, all the way to your lower back.

1598
02:33:53.799 --> 02:35:01.079
M on I thinker, Rea, thinker, peace drifting m mind

1599
02:35:04.840 --> 02:35:23.159
just wandering away, happy to let go, let go.

1600
02:35:27.440 --> 02:36:23.360
Completely, let go, so tranquil, the whole body.

1601
02:36:27.280 --> 02:37:00.000
Enjoying a sensor listing go he even more.

1602
02:37:03.319 --> 02:37:44.760
Usa as assists.

1603
02:37:38.479 --> 02:38:09.079
Us peace for.

1604
02:38:43.040 --> 02:40:22.760
Enjoy the space, this space of peace and safety. So fary, fy, relaxed, Yeah, yeah,

1605
02:41:04.120 --> 02:41:28.879
letting go. Maybe we can just focus on the different

1606
02:41:29.200 --> 02:42:04.000
parts of your body, just to notice a forehead in

1607
02:42:04.239 --> 02:43:08.840
your eyes ure so lose, noticing in the sense of

1608
02:43:08.840 --> 02:44:37.959
complete freedom, absolute freedom, drift drif Pea's for.

1609
02:44:40.040 --> 02:45:22.079
Energy peace to breeze so much easier.

1610
02:46:02.920 --> 02:46:03.280
Loose.

1611
02:46:24.520 --> 02:46:36.159
You may have or may not have noticed your mind

1612
02:46:36.840 --> 02:47:38.600
drifting peaceful moly even more deeply in the direction of

1613
02:47:43.399 --> 02:49:14.319
total blissful pace, blissful pace christ total peace.

1614
02:49:38.600 --> 02:49:45.000
Com.

1615
02:49:44.680 --> 02:50:40.120
So calm lett him go peace with mind relaxed forty

1616
02:50:57.440 --> 02:51:54.200
so relax, so relaxed. Your body feels almost invisible, so

1617
02:51:54.879 --> 02:53:14.639
very relaxed, peaceful, so peaceful, real licka, so peaceful. And

1618
02:53:14.799 --> 02:53:22.079
you could start to notice that you are feeling more relaxed,

1619
02:53:25.079 --> 02:53:34.840
even though I've not purposely focused your mind upon that

1620
02:53:36.200 --> 02:53:42.280
sense of physical comfort that is growing within you throughout

1621
02:53:42.360 --> 02:53:55.200
your body, and your mind starts to slow down, And

1622
02:53:55.319 --> 02:54:02.799
that could be almost in recognition of I guess my

1623
02:54:03.040 --> 02:54:17.799
speech not being particularly fast, and things just generally feel calmer.

1624
02:54:21.360 --> 02:54:29.280
Just by listening to my voice, you give yourself an

1625
02:54:29.360 --> 02:54:37.319
opportunity to take a break from the day, take a

1626
02:54:37.399 --> 02:54:45.040
break from your life as it is, and to give

1627
02:54:45.120 --> 02:54:53.200
yourself a rest, giving yourself permission to take some time

1628
02:54:53.360 --> 02:55:00.239
off and to allow your body to relax and to

1629
02:55:00.399 --> 02:55:10.920
allow your mind to slow down, which in turn, releases

1630
02:55:11.280 --> 02:55:15.959
the tension and he stresses that you had in your body.

1631
02:55:21.959 --> 02:55:25.840
It's almost as if the parts of your body just

1632
02:55:26.120 --> 02:55:37.799
open up, allowing the negativity out and at the same

1633
02:55:37.920 --> 02:55:49.200
time replacing that negativity with positive heathing energy, which then

1634
02:55:49.399 --> 02:55:58.520
fills your body up and your mind to also starts

1635
02:55:58.719 --> 02:56:16.159
to appreciate those feelings of increasing confidence, an almost uplifting feeling,

1636
02:56:18.239 --> 02:56:32.280
positive healing, an energy that spreads through your body like

1637
02:56:32.399 --> 02:56:42.639
a wave of comfort. And all this comes from just

1638
02:56:46.239 --> 02:56:55.000
allowing yourself a few minutes, maybe half an hour, however

1639
02:56:55.120 --> 02:57:04.799
long you want it to be, to just rest and

1640
02:57:05.000 --> 02:57:15.000
allow your mind and your body to almost reset itself

1641
02:57:17.879 --> 02:57:33.639
to the settings of comfort and relaxation, calmness, which allows

1642
02:57:34.000 --> 02:57:46.719
more room for feelings of pleasure and happiness to move

1643
02:57:47.280 --> 02:57:56.079
around your body and into your mind, almost as if

1644
02:57:56.120 --> 02:58:05.879
your mind and your body are sinking together, almost mirroring

1645
02:58:06.719 --> 02:58:19.559
each other with that growing positivity and calmness. And it

1646
02:58:19.680 --> 02:58:27.120
feels nice. It really does feel nice to know that

1647
02:58:27.440 --> 02:58:36.559
you are the one that has allowed yourself to feel

1648
02:58:37.079 --> 02:58:45.239
more comfort and to experience.

1649
02:58:47.000 --> 02:58:48.159
More of this.

1650
02:58:49.920 --> 02:59:05.079
Deep relaxation spreading throughout your body. And as I focus

1651
02:59:06.680 --> 02:59:12.440
on each part of your body, you can notice that

1652
02:59:12.639 --> 02:59:27.159
that part becomes even more relaxed just by focusing on it.

1653
02:59:29.719 --> 02:59:39.360
It becomes even more calm and comfortable, just by focusing.

1654
02:59:43.399 --> 02:59:49.159
And as I move down your body, starting at your head,

1655
02:59:51.879 --> 02:59:58.559
the parts that you've already focused on will continue to

1656
02:59:58.760 --> 03:00:06.399
relax deep and those parts that we've not yet focused

1657
03:00:06.440 --> 03:00:19.760
on or just automatically release any remain intention in anticipation

1658
03:00:20.200 --> 03:00:33.239
of even more comfort about to come. Now, I'm going

1659
03:00:33.280 --> 03:00:40.200
to start by focusing on your forehead. Just being aware

1660
03:00:40.520 --> 03:00:49.120
of the feelings of your forehead and any background sounds

1661
03:00:50.920 --> 03:00:55.760
like mister Herbert the pigeon can just allow you to

1662
03:00:55.959 --> 03:01:03.200
feel even more relaxed. Just means you're in the moment.

1663
03:01:06.319 --> 03:01:11.680
This isn't this isn't a sterile environment. This is the world.

1664
03:01:15.120 --> 03:01:21.159
I live in the countryside, so there's lots of nature

1665
03:01:21.680 --> 03:01:32.159
sounds around. So as you focus on your forehead, just

1666
03:01:32.440 --> 03:01:40.239
notice how it becomes even more relaxed as you focus

1667
03:01:42.520 --> 03:01:47.000
only on my voice and that part of your body.

1668
03:01:52.200 --> 03:01:59.799
Moving down to your eyes, focusing on your eyes, no

1669
03:02:00.200 --> 03:02:10.840
to sin how your eyelids feel so heavy yet so

1670
03:02:11.239 --> 03:02:18.479
light at the same time, and all the muscles around

1671
03:02:18.559 --> 03:02:31.239
your eyes relaxing, completely moving your focus down to your mouth,

1672
03:02:33.120 --> 03:02:40.120
your lips, your tongue, your teeth, and your gumbs, the

1673
03:02:40.360 --> 03:02:54.879
whole of your mouth relaxing, calm and loose. As you

1674
03:02:55.040 --> 03:03:02.959
focus now on your jaw, not just the parts of

1675
03:03:03.079 --> 03:03:07.719
your jaw near your mouth and your chin, but all

1676
03:03:07.799 --> 03:03:12.319
the way up the size of your face to your ears,

1677
03:03:14.559 --> 03:03:30.440
that hole of your jaw feeding more relaxed and calm.

1678
03:03:38.600 --> 03:03:47.680
Focusing on your neck, the front of your neck and

1679
03:03:47.799 --> 03:04:01.399
your throat relaxing and loose and calm. Sides of your neck,

1680
03:04:03.479 --> 03:04:10.399
the right and left side of your neck relax and

1681
03:04:12.000 --> 03:04:25.600
loose and calm. And now the back of your neck,

1682
03:04:28.920 --> 03:04:38.920
focusing on the back of your neck, letting go of

1683
03:04:39.120 --> 03:04:46.000
any tension that may have been there before, and enjoying

1684
03:04:46.360 --> 03:05:00.000
that sense of increasing comfort and release that you can experience.

1685
03:05:00.120 --> 03:05:10.520
It's in the back of your neck, moving down your

1686
03:05:10.680 --> 03:05:17.959
back and moving either side of your spine right from

1687
03:05:18.040 --> 03:05:23.399
the top of your back all the way down to

1688
03:05:23.520 --> 03:05:35.760
the bottom of your back, down to your lower back.

1689
03:05:40.840 --> 03:05:47.879
And as you move up and down your spine, you

1690
03:05:47.959 --> 03:05:55.120
can feel the muscles either side of your spine relaxing

1691
03:05:55.799 --> 03:06:09.159
even more. And as those muscles relax, that sense of

1692
03:06:09.440 --> 03:06:20.120
comfort starts to spread outwards from your spine into both

1693
03:06:20.319 --> 03:06:27.879
sides of your back, the top of your back, the middle,

1694
03:06:28.000 --> 03:06:36.479
and your lower back. And as you scan gently and

1695
03:06:37.079 --> 03:06:44.000
slowly up and down your back, there's the muscles in

1696
03:06:44.120 --> 03:06:53.479
the top of your back relax and become looser. The

1697
03:06:53.600 --> 03:06:59.559
muscles in the middle of your back also seem to

1698
03:06:59.799 --> 03:07:09.040
just to almost divide from each other, separating and almost melting.

1699
03:07:14.799 --> 03:07:20.799
And in your lower back it seems to be an

1700
03:07:20.840 --> 03:07:35.040
extra special feeling of comfort. The spreads into your hips,

1701
03:07:37.360 --> 03:07:45.159
so down your lower back, into your hips, into the

1702
03:07:45.360 --> 03:07:54.120
area where your cosis are, and into your buttocks, and

1703
03:07:54.239 --> 03:08:03.639
all those muscles that spread in lower back into your

1704
03:08:03.760 --> 03:08:16.959
hip area start to melt, start to really let go.

1705
03:08:23.520 --> 03:08:28.520
I don't even nowhere about to focus on your shoulders.

1706
03:08:30.280 --> 03:08:37.239
Your back and your spine will continue to let go,

1707
03:08:40.360 --> 03:08:55.959
continue to relax so calmly. And as you focus on

1708
03:08:56.079 --> 03:09:09.000
your shoulders, you may notice that they're already feeling really loose,

1709
03:09:13.799 --> 03:09:39.760
They're already feeding calm, and they're feeling Those muscles then

1710
03:09:39.959 --> 03:09:52.360
move from your neck into your shoulders feel so soft

1711
03:09:55.639 --> 03:10:21.200
and gentle, so smooth and calm, and the feeling in

1712
03:10:21.319 --> 03:10:36.120
your shoulders seems to spread deep into your shoulders, that

1713
03:10:36.479 --> 03:10:45.319
sense of relaxation, not just traveling deeply into your muscles,

1714
03:10:48.799 --> 03:11:01.680
but also relaxing the bones and moving all the way

1715
03:11:01.920 --> 03:11:10.639
to underneath your arms, relaxing that whole area between the

1716
03:11:10.799 --> 03:11:25.319
tops of your shoulders and underneath your arms healing. You

1717
03:11:25.479 --> 03:11:39.000
feel so relaxed and comfortable in your shoulders, which sends

1718
03:11:39.319 --> 03:12:01.360
that deep healing message into your arms. You may feel

1719
03:12:03.200 --> 03:12:08.239
almost as if your arms are not even there, because

1720
03:12:08.360 --> 03:12:44.879
they're so relaxed, so deeply relaxed, so so calm, so

1721
03:12:51.680 --> 03:13:06.719
loose that fear and spreading all the way down your arms,

1722
03:13:09.479 --> 03:13:35.440
two your elbows, including your elbows circumforts spreads or away

1723
03:13:38.159 --> 03:13:53.159
into your wrists, your forearments and your wrists feeing so heavy.

1724
03:13:56.840 --> 03:14:38.399
Yet at the same time, sunlight and gentle folks, see.

1725
03:14:40.600 --> 03:14:41.600
Now on.

1726
03:14:44.280 --> 03:15:37.920
Your hands, my hands, so peaceful in your hands. There's

1727
03:15:37.959 --> 03:16:01.319
a sense of real peace. It just seems to feel

1728
03:16:03.600 --> 03:16:40.319
so familiar when your hands relax deeply. Is your things?

1729
03:17:12.479 --> 03:18:17.399
A thing? Is solidly you thing? It tips Moving your

1730
03:18:17.479 --> 03:18:47.040
attention to the front of your body, so comfortable. Moving

1731
03:18:47.360 --> 03:20:14.399
your focus to your legs, love muscles in your thighs,

1732
03:20:31.159 --> 03:21:08.639
your knees, so relaxed, a calf muscles and just shains

1733
03:21:12.280 --> 03:21:13.719
a pusy.

1734
03:22:06.040 --> 03:23:27.399
Four and the fathing and your feet, sir, peaceful, so calm,

1735
03:23:33.159 --> 03:24:22.799
so peaceful, so calm m, so peaceful, so calm, so.

1736
03:24:24.799 --> 03:24:56.520
Peace fall relax sin peace fall, so calm, loving.

1737
03:24:56.319 --> 03:25:03.479
That deep relaxation. Just spread your chest and your stomach,

1738
03:25:16.559 --> 03:25:35.600
letting go everything. So I'm gonna start counting down now

1739
03:25:38.319 --> 03:25:47.000
from twenty down to one. You can imagine in a

1740
03:25:47.040 --> 03:25:52.840
way it's like just walking down some steps and each

1741
03:25:53.079 --> 03:25:58.719
step or twenty steps, and each step represents a level

1742
03:25:59.239 --> 03:26:11.959
of comfort. Each step represents a deepening of that comfort.

1743
03:26:18.600 --> 03:26:23.760
And the firvies you walk down those steps that are

1744
03:26:23.879 --> 03:26:35.040
deeper and more relaxed, you feel so starting with number

1745
03:26:35.159 --> 03:32:07.639
twenty twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen, sixteen three four four see

1746
03:33:13.799 --> 03:33:14.479
too well.

1747
03:34:13.399 --> 03:39:32.479
Five two nine eight seven.

1748
03:39:10.719 --> 03:40:20.280
U six.

1749
03:41:25.319 --> 03:47:18.719
Five four two two one. And now as you focus

1750
03:47:18.840 --> 03:47:32.520
on your eyes, we're gonna count down from ten out one,

1751
03:47:38.920 --> 03:47:48.479
focusing just on your eyes, your eyelids, the muscles around

1752
03:47:48.600 --> 03:48:00.120
your eyes, your eye wolves themselves, our whole area that

1753
03:48:00.280 --> 03:48:14.360
makes up your eye. And as we count down from

1754
03:48:14.520 --> 03:48:29.200
ten down to one, whilst focusing on your eyes, you'll

1755
03:48:29.559 --> 03:48:43.879
become twice is relaxed with each number counting down, and

1756
03:48:44.159 --> 03:48:51.399
you may find the all you want to do is

1757
03:48:51.879 --> 03:49:00.319
just drift off to sleep, and it's that that's what

1758
03:49:00.559 --> 03:49:13.079
you want, then just allow yourself to do that. Now,

1759
03:49:16.040 --> 03:49:22.000
focus in on your eyes. I'm going to begin counting

1760
03:49:22.159 --> 03:50:06.200
down from ten down to one right now. Ten nine.

1761
03:50:40.239 --> 03:53:16.360
Eight seven, day.

1762
03:53:38.000 --> 03:58:52.840
Five four e three two one. So counted down from

1763
03:58:52.920 --> 03:59:13.959
ten to one ten nine seven six five four three

1764
03:59:16.840 --> 03:59:28.879
two one. And maybe that was a bit too quick

1765
03:59:29.479 --> 03:59:33.360
in order to relax. Maybe it's a bit too fast

1766
03:59:33.680 --> 03:59:42.479
for you to notice the calming of your body, maybe

1767
03:59:43.319 --> 03:59:47.159
even a little bit of pressure there, Like you're counting

1768
03:59:47.280 --> 03:59:50.559
down from ten to one. Would you expect me to do? Man,

1769
03:59:51.479 --> 03:59:55.159
expect me to stick go with floppy just because you're

1770
03:59:55.280 --> 04:00:04.760
counting down. If you try again, but this time, I

1771
04:00:04.879 --> 04:00:12.040
go this lower. This time, as you focus on the

1772
04:00:12.200 --> 04:00:16.319
whole of your body before we focus on your legs,

1773
04:00:18.760 --> 04:00:27.959
just notice how your body does start to feel more

1774
04:00:28.360 --> 04:00:47.360
relaxed with every number that I count down ten nine

1775
04:00:53.200 --> 04:02:22.280
eight seven six five four three two one. And just

1776
04:02:22.520 --> 04:02:28.440
notice how how you feel generally, how your body feels.

1777
04:02:35.120 --> 04:02:43.399
It's not necessarily even about counting down from ten to one.

1778
04:02:46.360 --> 04:02:59.760
It's that space that you have, that space between being

1779
04:03:03.360 --> 04:03:14.920
active physically or mentally to just sitting or lying down,

1780
04:03:15.600 --> 04:03:20.399
just being there, not doing anything, not saying anything, or

1781
04:03:21.239 --> 04:03:27.520
needing to think about anything. So it opens up a space,

1782
04:03:28.479 --> 04:03:37.639
you know, a bit of a space, a gap. And

1783
04:03:37.760 --> 04:03:42.319
the more I came down from ten to one, the

1784
04:03:42.399 --> 04:03:50.360
bigger that gap becomes. So there's that gap of calmness,

1785
04:03:51.799 --> 04:04:07.440
of comfort, relaxation. It's a nice feeling, and it moves

1786
04:04:09.040 --> 04:04:18.920
those stresses or discomforts physically or emotionally, moves them away.

1787
04:04:25.719 --> 04:04:38.440
Allows you to just slow down, someone to count again

1788
04:04:38.520 --> 04:04:44.719
from ten down to one, and notice that gap widening,

1789
04:04:46.920 --> 04:04:51.360
the gap. And as it widens, it's almost like the

1790
04:04:53.079 --> 04:05:10.600
stress and attention falls into the gap. What gives you

1791
04:05:10.719 --> 04:05:14.319
that distance? That space?

1792
04:05:16.680 --> 04:05:16.840
Now?

1793
04:05:21.680 --> 04:07:11.440
Ten nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three two one.

1794
04:07:23.360 --> 04:07:44.520
How does your body feel now? Can you notice do

1795
04:07:44.600 --> 04:08:21.520
you feeling calmer, the feeling more relaxed as we now

1796
04:08:21.719 --> 04:08:42.040
focus on your legs, just your legs. We're just gonna

1797
04:08:42.479 --> 04:09:01.879
start with focusing on your thighs. Of course, it's not

1798
04:09:02.000 --> 04:09:10.479
the most exciting thing to be doing because I'm sure

1799
04:09:10.639 --> 04:09:13.200
like most of your body is not a lot going

1800
04:09:13.280 --> 04:09:25.959
on right now. Just focusing on the whole of your thighs,

1801
04:09:28.760 --> 04:09:32.479
the tops of your thighs, the sides of your thighs,

1802
04:09:34.719 --> 04:09:39.159
the bottoms of your thighs, your outer thighs, and your

1803
04:09:39.280 --> 04:09:44.520
inner thighs. Basically the whole of your thigh that leads

1804
04:09:45.559 --> 04:10:01.120
into your hip and it goes down to your knee joints. Now,

1805
04:10:01.200 --> 04:10:08.200
this is a big area. It's a very heavy area.

1806
04:10:08.719 --> 04:10:14.680
It's very strong, probably the strongest muscles in your body

1807
04:10:15.399 --> 04:10:29.680
or in your thighs. But I don't think we perhaps

1808
04:10:31.440 --> 04:10:42.079
will give enough attention to our thighs. Perhaps we don't

1809
04:10:43.639 --> 04:11:04.120
acknowledge how important our thighs are to our lives, how

1810
04:11:04.280 --> 04:11:13.399
much they actually do for us all through our lives.

1811
04:11:20.559 --> 04:11:26.120
And it may seem to sound really weird, but I

1812
04:11:26.239 --> 04:11:32.200
think that all of our body parts, especially our thighs,

1813
04:11:33.200 --> 04:11:40.520
need some TLC, a bit of love shown, a bit

1814
04:11:40.600 --> 04:11:59.799
of acknowledgement, thank you, gratitude for our thighs do for us.

1815
04:12:06.440 --> 04:12:12.040
And I know this may sound a bit strange. Maybe

1816
04:12:12.079 --> 04:12:14.879
you think, why am I? Surely how I should be

1817
04:12:14.920 --> 04:12:19.719
out in the garden hugging a tree or something. Wow,

1818
04:12:23.840 --> 04:12:26.120
it's hard to set a microphone up on a tree.

1819
04:12:27.159 --> 04:12:29.399
That's why I'm doing this indoors. Otherwise I would be

1820
04:12:29.440 --> 04:12:33.200
outside hugging a tree. Now I can't see the television

1821
04:12:33.239 --> 04:12:41.840
from the tree. If you move down to your knees

1822
04:12:43.760 --> 04:12:51.680
gain such an important part. And I think we don't

1823
04:12:51.760 --> 04:12:59.600
necessarily I'll speak for myself here, I don't necessarily appreciate

1824
04:13:01.399 --> 04:13:06.479
all that my nees do for me until I have

1825
04:13:06.600 --> 04:13:10.000
a problem with my knee. It's occasionally, if I ever,

1826
04:13:11.600 --> 04:13:15.520
maybe i'll pash it, or it's aching for some reason.

1827
04:13:17.280 --> 04:13:23.440
It's then that I realize how much it does. You know,

1828
04:13:23.559 --> 04:13:29.520
the benefit of being able to use my legs without

1829
04:13:31.280 --> 04:13:38.520
any kind of physical discomfort is a beautiful thing that's

1830
04:13:38.760 --> 04:13:47.120
possibly not appreciated until it's temporarily removed. You know that's comfort.

1831
04:13:51.239 --> 04:13:55.840
But as you focus on your knees, regardless of how

1832
04:13:55.920 --> 04:14:03.399
your knees feel, you can have that sense of gratitude

1833
04:14:04.959 --> 04:14:07.559
and love to your knees for all that they do

1834
04:14:07.760 --> 04:14:20.760
for you. And you can still have that attention on

1835
04:14:20.879 --> 04:14:27.040
your thighs and maybe notice how your thighs feel, Maybe

1836
04:14:27.760 --> 04:14:45.319
notice that they are relaxing more deeply as you focus

1837
04:14:45.520 --> 04:14:51.079
now on the bottoms of your legs, your shins and

1838
04:14:51.200 --> 04:14:57.760
your calf muscles, the bones between your knees and your

1839
04:14:57.799 --> 04:15:10.799
feet breat and of course your ankles so important. You know,

1840
04:15:10.879 --> 04:15:15.680
anyone that's had even like the slightest sprain of an

1841
04:15:15.719 --> 04:15:23.799
ankle knows how how much we take our ankles for granted.

1842
04:15:29.719 --> 04:15:31.719
And it's kind of strange in a way when you

1843
04:15:31.799 --> 04:15:37.399
think that. You know, logically, our wrists are a lot

1844
04:15:37.559 --> 04:15:42.399
thinner than the rest of our arms, which is okay,

1845
04:15:42.479 --> 04:15:46.200
it doesn't I can't see any problem with that because

1846
04:15:46.239 --> 04:15:52.239
we're just picking stuff up. But our ankles so much

1847
04:15:52.520 --> 04:16:02.159
thinner than the rest of our legs, and from a

1848
04:16:02.280 --> 04:16:07.120
physics perspective or logical even it doesn't really make sense

1849
04:16:08.479 --> 04:16:15.840
that all this weight would ultimately be resting on your

1850
04:16:15.920 --> 04:16:30.920
ankles then leading to your feet, that thin area, thin bone. Yeah,

1851
04:16:31.000 --> 04:16:36.719
it does so much great work. Supports us, supports our

1852
04:16:36.799 --> 04:16:48.600
body for a lifetime, helps us to balance, That helps

1853
04:16:48.639 --> 04:17:01.280
you to get around and be mobile. And there's the

1854
04:17:01.399 --> 04:17:09.559
calf muscles. Of course, when I was younger, I couldn't

1855
04:17:09.559 --> 04:17:14.959
see the point in calf muscles didn't seem to do anything. Okay,

1856
04:17:16.079 --> 04:17:19.600
if I walked around on tiptoes, then my calf muscles

1857
04:17:19.680 --> 04:17:23.159
get some work. But of course that's not true. The

1858
04:17:23.319 --> 04:17:27.680
calf muscles are being used whenever we use our legs,

1859
04:17:33.280 --> 04:17:45.920
and your shins there to protect your lower legs, shaped

1860
04:17:45.959 --> 04:17:50.680
in a way, almost as a protector for the bone,

1861
04:17:58.239 --> 04:18:10.159
leading of course to your ankles and your feet. But

1862
04:18:10.239 --> 04:18:12.159
we're not going to focus on your feet. We're just

1863
04:18:12.239 --> 04:18:18.680
going to focus on the legs. I realize, but now

1864
04:18:18.760 --> 04:18:23.319
that I've mentioned your feet, it probably focuses on them anyway,

1865
04:18:23.840 --> 04:18:26.440
So maybe I should focus on your feet a little bit.

1866
04:18:30.440 --> 04:18:34.879
You can have them in your awareness the same as

1867
04:18:34.959 --> 04:18:39.319
you have your thighs in your awareness. Even though we

1868
04:18:39.440 --> 04:18:43.399
haven't been focusing on your thighs for a few minutes,

1869
04:18:45.200 --> 04:18:56.000
we'll be focusing on your ankles. There's still that sensation

1870
04:18:56.280 --> 04:19:12.280
of comfort in your thighs in this that movement of energy,

1871
04:19:14.360 --> 04:19:21.399
because the thighs hold lots of different sensations. Of course,

1872
04:19:21.479 --> 04:19:26.239
there's the muscles, the big straw muscles that we have

1873
04:19:26.440 --> 04:19:39.760
in our thighs, but the skin on the outside of

1874
04:19:39.840 --> 04:19:45.159
the thighs, as in the outside of all of our body,

1875
04:19:45.959 --> 04:19:57.520
can be very sensitive, sensitive to the touch, sensitive to temperature,

1876
04:20:04.079 --> 04:20:11.639
and inside your thighs the bones, there's the muscle, there's

1877
04:20:11.680 --> 04:20:16.799
the blood vessels, the archrees, it's all this stuff that's

1878
04:20:17.000 --> 04:20:25.840
inside your thighs. I guess sometimes it'd be nice if

1879
04:20:25.840 --> 04:20:30.680
you could actually put your fingers inside your thighs and

1880
04:20:30.799 --> 04:20:36.559
a message, so you can message on the outside, of course,

1881
04:20:37.399 --> 04:20:39.680
but to be able to get deep into the muscles,

1882
04:20:40.600 --> 04:20:44.520
and to be able to just message inside your thighs,

1883
04:20:45.399 --> 04:20:53.840
message in the bones of your leg message in all

1884
04:20:53.920 --> 04:21:00.520
the veins, and just gently heaving your thigh eyes.

1885
04:21:04.200 --> 04:21:05.799
And you could move down.

1886
04:21:07.559 --> 04:21:12.600
Message and inside your knees. It's a message in those bones,

1887
04:21:13.639 --> 04:21:20.639
but with healing fingertips spreading that healing energy deep into

1888
04:21:20.760 --> 04:21:30.159
the joints of your knees. Of course, there's the back

1889
04:21:30.440 --> 04:21:35.360
of your your knee, you know, the inside crease where

1890
04:21:35.399 --> 04:21:42.879
your knee is. It's a really sensitive area. Very it

1891
04:21:42.920 --> 04:21:46.760
feels very nice when you stroke it. That might be

1892
04:21:46.920 --> 04:21:50.879
because it's an area that's not really touched very often.

1893
04:21:52.920 --> 04:21:59.760
It's almost like a hidden part, that crease in your legs.

1894
04:21:59.799 --> 04:22:07.200
It's almost like a part that has a sensitivity, which

1895
04:22:07.280 --> 04:22:17.719
is a little bit different. Of course, it's protected by

1896
04:22:17.799 --> 04:22:29.200
your legs, so you can imagine putting your fingers into

1897
04:22:29.319 --> 04:22:39.760
that crease in your legs, folding between your legs. You

1898
04:22:39.799 --> 04:22:44.680
can just message with your fingertips. Imagine your fingertips going

1899
04:22:44.879 --> 04:22:55.319
inside massage in the muscle tissue. You can of course

1900
04:22:55.479 --> 04:23:02.120
feel the bones of your knees healing through your fingertips.

1901
04:23:09.520 --> 04:23:14.840
And then as you go down to your calf muscles,

1902
04:23:15.239 --> 04:23:16.959
and that's the part I'd like to be able to

1903
04:23:17.799 --> 04:23:25.120
really put my fingertips deep inside my calf muscles, massage

1904
04:23:25.239 --> 04:23:34.319
in every single tissue of that muscle, healing every part.

1905
04:23:40.280 --> 04:23:46.360
And then doing the same for my shins, massage in

1906
04:23:47.239 --> 04:23:54.159
gently stroking the bones, gently stroking them, healing in a

1907
04:23:54.319 --> 04:24:01.479
loving way, because they deserve to be treated as the

1908
04:24:01.600 --> 04:24:06.200
precious bones that they are. Our legs are so precious

1909
04:24:07.200 --> 04:24:11.840
as in all the other parts of our body, the

1910
04:24:12.000 --> 04:24:25.760
more precious of anyture on the planet. When when you

1911
04:24:25.959 --> 04:24:38.120
start to think about your legs in this way, it

1912
04:24:38.239 --> 04:24:47.879
can change your perspective. It might sound a bit a

1913
04:24:47.959 --> 04:24:53.239
bit silly to start with the idea of having love

1914
04:24:53.799 --> 04:25:03.159
for your legs, showing appreciation for your fie, wanting to

1915
04:25:03.239 --> 04:25:09.040
be able to put your hands in your thighs the

1916
04:25:09.280 --> 04:25:15.639
message the muscles and the bones, and to get your

1917
04:25:15.760 --> 04:25:24.239
fingers deep in there, releasing all tension, just to show

1918
04:25:26.159 --> 04:25:33.520
how much you care about your legs. How much you

1919
04:25:33.639 --> 04:25:36.440
care for what your legs do.

1920
04:25:36.799 --> 04:25:37.040
For you.

1921
04:25:38.639 --> 04:25:50.760
Regularly, your knees, your calves, your ankles, the strength of

1922
04:25:50.879 --> 04:25:58.959
your ankles considering how thin they are compared to the

1923
04:25:59.040 --> 04:26:06.719
rest of your legs, especially your thighs. Yeah, they're so strong,

1924
04:26:08.280 --> 04:26:22.719
so flexible, absolutely amazing things. Your ankles are truly a

1925
04:26:22.879 --> 04:26:33.680
gift because of what they do for you, supporting all

1926
04:26:33.920 --> 04:26:40.760
that weight, regardless of how what weight you are, even

1927
04:26:40.799 --> 04:26:45.440
if you're only eight stone, there's still a lot of

1928
04:26:45.559 --> 04:26:52.600
weight for these little ankles. Now, I'm a lot heavier

1929
04:26:52.680 --> 04:27:02.360
than eight stone double dock, yet my ankle support my

1930
04:27:02.479 --> 04:27:09.760
body all the time, or they do give off a

1931
04:27:09.920 --> 04:27:15.319
sigh of relief when I sit down. That's have my

1932
04:27:15.399 --> 04:27:25.120
whole legs though my feet feet also go, my toes clap.

1933
04:27:26.360 --> 04:27:55.000
I'm so happy. Your legs really are amazing. I don't know,

1934
04:27:55.479 --> 04:28:01.840
but talking about talking about your legs is probably possibly

1935
04:28:02.200 --> 04:28:06.079
one of the most most boring things I've ever heard

1936
04:28:06.120 --> 04:28:14.159
anyone say. Possibly, but we're boring or not. Everything I

1937
04:28:14.280 --> 04:28:30.200
said is true. Your legs are amazing. Your legs deserve

1938
04:28:31.280 --> 04:28:49.840
not just respect, They deserve to relax deeply. They deserve

1939
04:28:50.120 --> 04:28:55.000
to take some time out of the day to just

1940
04:28:55.360 --> 04:29:31.559
let go completely. The legs really can relax. And because

1941
04:29:31.600 --> 04:29:35.559
the legs are so such a most, you know, very

1942
04:29:35.639 --> 04:29:41.360
important part of your body, and your relax your legs,

1943
04:29:41.440 --> 04:29:48.680
the rest of your body also naturally follows in that

1944
04:29:52.399 --> 04:30:03.239
journey of comfort. I can feel it in my hips.

1945
04:30:04.639 --> 04:30:11.760
My hips feel really loose, and also my lighter back

1946
04:30:11.799 --> 04:30:18.399
as well. My lower back really feels it feels stretched,

1947
04:30:19.559 --> 04:30:22.559
even though I'm just sitting in a chair and there's

1948
04:30:22.680 --> 04:30:27.920
no stretching as far as I'm aware that I'm doing,

1949
04:30:28.879 --> 04:30:31.479
but it's almost as if the muscles are just relaxed

1950
04:30:31.559 --> 04:30:37.159
so much that there is a natural stretch as the

1951
04:30:37.319 --> 04:30:59.559
tension has reduced a lot. And I'm now going to

1952
04:30:59.639 --> 04:31:07.840
count album ten down to one, and you can continue

1953
04:31:09.719 --> 04:31:35.959
to fill wonderfully relaxed ten nine eight, seven, six, five,

1954
04:31:40.639 --> 04:31:49.040
four three two.

1955
04:31:53.200 --> 04:31:53.440
One.

1956
04:31:59.479 --> 04:32:11.440
Really, So I'm just going to count down from five

1957
04:32:11.639 --> 04:32:15.840
down to one, and as I countdown, if you just

1958
04:32:15.959 --> 04:32:23.760
focus on the numbers, just the numbers counting down, and

1959
04:32:24.000 --> 04:32:33.159
notice how you feel in this moment as you hear

1960
04:32:33.239 --> 04:32:40.840
the numbers counting down, knowing that those numbers counting down

1961
04:32:41.000 --> 04:32:51.000
represent you feeling calmer, not just in your body, but

1962
04:32:51.159 --> 04:32:59.319
also relaxing your mind. I'll just notice how you feel.

1963
04:33:00.200 --> 04:33:06.080
There's nothing to do, there's nothing to say, there's nothing

1964
04:33:06.240 --> 04:33:58.840
to think about, starting with number five four three two one. Now,

1965
04:33:58.919 --> 04:34:11.159
as you notice the gradual letting go that the tension

1966
04:34:11.400 --> 04:34:18.520
in your body, you may also begin to notice and

1967
04:34:18.680 --> 04:34:27.680
be aware of how your mind is starting to slow down.

1968
04:34:30.159 --> 04:34:36.520
This is just a natural thing that happens. It's not

1969
04:34:36.720 --> 04:34:41.919
really a special procedure. It's just natural because as your

1970
04:34:43.240 --> 04:34:49.200
body relaxes, your mind also starts to relax, and the

1971
04:34:49.319 --> 04:34:52.919
more your mind relaxes, the more your body relaxes. It's

1972
04:34:53.119 --> 04:35:05.159
just a continuous circle of relaxation. And there's that calmness

1973
04:35:05.400 --> 04:35:12.560
that comes from relative quietness. You know, even even if

1974
04:35:12.599 --> 04:35:20.159
there's background sounds either your side, online, it's still going

1975
04:35:20.279 --> 04:35:25.279
to be quite calm. You know, you haven't got the

1976
04:35:25.439 --> 04:35:30.599
television on, there's no music in the background, unless you're

1977
04:35:30.599 --> 04:35:32.240
listening to the recorded with music.

1978
04:35:32.400 --> 04:35:39.599
Of course, you're very likely not going to be sitting

1979
04:35:39.639 --> 04:35:42.799
in a room with other people. Of course you might be,

1980
04:35:43.000 --> 04:35:47.360
but generally it's more ideal if you can do this

1981
04:35:47.560 --> 04:35:48.279
on your own.

1982
04:35:49.799 --> 04:35:59.799
So no distractions, and when you stop thinking about stuff,

1983
04:36:06.439 --> 04:36:16.680
relaxation automatically rises, a sense of comfort starts to grow,

1984
04:36:21.200 --> 04:36:27.880
and without trying to build it up into something fantastical

1985
04:36:28.240 --> 04:36:40.040
or something magical, this is just a natural process, something

1986
04:36:40.200 --> 04:36:51.159
that's easy to accomplish. In fact, it's almost the sense

1987
04:36:51.279 --> 04:36:58.080
of relaxing completely happens really when you put no effort

1988
04:36:58.400 --> 04:37:05.080
into it, not something that you can really force. It's

1989
04:37:05.200 --> 04:37:14.759
something that happens naturally. And part of the process of

1990
04:37:16.439 --> 04:37:28.360
this recording and others is simply two allow you to

1991
04:37:28.520 --> 04:37:43.639
take advantage of this space this time, to just let go,

1992
04:37:46.799 --> 04:37:55.000
to just be here, to be in tune with how

1993
04:37:55.080 --> 04:38:08.479
you feel, yet with the intention of wanting to relax

1994
04:38:08.599 --> 04:38:19.959
deeply and maybe even to fall asleep, depending on what

1995
04:38:20.159 --> 04:38:26.279
it is that you wish for yourself in this moment.

1996
04:38:33.240 --> 04:38:42.639
As we know, relaxing is the majority of the process

1997
04:38:42.759 --> 04:38:47.919
of falling asleep. The actual falling asleep part is the

1998
04:38:48.040 --> 04:38:55.840
tiny bit at the end. The deeper relaxed you become,

1999
04:38:59.759 --> 04:39:17.759
the easier you find yourself drifting. You can also if

2000
04:39:17.799 --> 04:39:28.680
you choose stay focused on my voice and really enjoy

2001
04:39:34.599 --> 04:40:03.720
the process gradually relaxing each muscle in your body effortlessly

2002
04:40:10.799 --> 04:40:38.159
and just observing the sensation of letting go completely. This

2003
04:40:38.479 --> 04:40:47.000
time I'm gonna count from six down to one, and

2004
04:40:47.319 --> 04:40:57.799
you can notice your mind calming down more with each number.

2005
04:41:00.119 --> 04:42:41.959
Hear me say, naturally, fear, calm, slow, beatful, six, five, four, three,

2006
04:43:20.000 --> 04:44:19.639
two four, being aware how your mind to slowed right down,

2007
04:44:22.919 --> 04:44:46.319
sinking deeply into relaxation. And as you focus on your mind,

2008
04:44:46.599 --> 04:44:59.439
you may notice that there's some thoughts still there, maybe

2009
04:44:59.560 --> 04:45:09.360
some doublen thoughts that for some reason perhaps need your attention.

2010
04:45:16.279 --> 04:45:17.759
That's what you can do is.

2011
04:45:23.200 --> 04:45:35.680
Send love to those thoughts. Sprinkle those thoughts with love

2012
04:45:37.439 --> 04:45:41.639
like a petals from a flower. Just sprinkle it over them,

2013
04:45:43.119 --> 04:45:50.240
petals filled with love towards those thoughts, to let those

2014
04:45:50.479 --> 04:45:56.599
thoughts know that a lot of bandon in them. You

2015
04:45:56.840 --> 04:46:04.360
just need them to require that to just calm down,

2016
04:46:06.639 --> 04:46:24.040
slow down, quiet down. And now, so as you focus

2017
04:46:24.159 --> 04:46:29.439
on those remaining thoughts, as we count down this time

2018
04:46:29.560 --> 04:46:38.000
from seven down to one, with each number, just imagine

2019
04:46:38.159 --> 04:46:54.240
sprinkling those flower petals of love, kindness, gratitude over those thoughts,

2020
04:46:59.360 --> 04:47:04.400
which will all help them to just melt away and

2021
04:47:04.560 --> 04:47:05.560
relaxed deeply.

2022
04:47:09.720 --> 04:47:10.919
The very number.

2023
04:47:16.560 --> 04:47:33.880
These thoughts would become more and more relaxed starting with

2024
04:47:34.200 --> 04:49:44.119
number seven, six, five, four, three, one.

2025
04:50:01.119 --> 04:50:02.000
Let you now.

2026
04:50:06.080 --> 04:50:27.279
Notice how relaxed your feeling in your body. We're going

2027
04:50:27.439 --> 04:50:41.119
to focus on your hands. Is the more relaxed your

2028
04:50:41.319 --> 04:50:48.479
hands are, the more relaxed your body and mind love.

2029
04:51:03.360 --> 04:51:03.400
This.

2030
04:51:05.279 --> 04:51:15.400
You focus on your hands and your fingers. There's nothing

2031
04:51:15.919 --> 04:51:20.639
needed to be done. There's no clenching of fists or

2032
04:51:21.720 --> 04:51:23.360
dancing the fingers or.

2033
04:51:23.360 --> 04:51:26.799
Anything like that. Mm hmmmm.

2034
04:51:31.520 --> 04:51:45.759
It's just noticing and focusing on your hands, noticing how

2035
04:51:45.840 --> 04:51:46.880
they feel.

2036
04:52:01.200 --> 04:52:01.599
A kiss.

2037
04:52:01.720 --> 04:52:02.639
The more.

2038
04:52:04.560 --> 04:52:15.319
Relates, Joannes feel, the calm your mind feels, and the

2039
04:52:15.720 --> 04:52:35.159
more comfort you feel throughout your body. Gee may have

2040
04:52:39.200 --> 04:53:00.040
already noticed your mind is starting.

2041
04:53:03.000 --> 04:53:03.759
To dread.

2042
04:53:17.560 --> 04:53:31.639
Like you said, just on your hands and fingers, allowing.

2043
04:53:31.680 --> 04:53:33.560
Them cheap.

2044
04:53:35.360 --> 04:53:45.240
Experience, a real deepening of that relaxation.

2045
04:53:46.000 --> 04:54:05.319
In your hands and fingers, more and more relaxed. Each number.

2046
04:54:12.880 --> 04:54:13.759
From eight.

2047
04:54:16.000 --> 04:54:22.319
Down to one, you've.

2048
04:54:22.279 --> 04:54:34.080
Almost view that healing, relaxing energy spreading into your hands

2049
04:54:35.240 --> 04:54:40.560
and fingers, becoming.

2050
04:54:44.479 --> 04:54:46.000
Year more.

2051
04:54:48.000 --> 04:55:01.439
Relaxing with each number. Yar coming down.

2052
04:55:03.360 --> 04:55:05.959
Light down to what.

2053
04:55:10.279 --> 04:55:11.119
Toist two.

2054
04:55:14.520 --> 04:55:21.599
Toist in again? Starting with.

2055
04:55:26.159 --> 04:55:34.599
No has.

2056
04:59:21.279 --> 04:59:30.560
Just being here now, nothing to think about, nothing to do,

2057
04:59:32.200 --> 04:59:33.319
nothing to say.

2058
04:59:37.279 --> 04:59:49.040
And everything just feels. This is your natural state.

2059
04:59:48.919 --> 04:59:49.360
To be in.

2060
04:59:53.040 --> 04:59:56.360
This is how you just normally feel.

2061
04:59:58.200 --> 05:00:07.400
Take it away, do that up. Stop didn't add the

2062
05:00:07.840 --> 05:00:27.560
stress and worry insoid en thinking about stuff. You take

2063
05:00:27.799 --> 05:00:28.840
that away.

2064
05:00:31.400 --> 05:00:31.880
Do now.

2065
05:00:38.439 --> 05:00:49.000
M h m hm. A new sense of sport which

2066
05:00:49.240 --> 05:00:49.840
comes to.

2067
05:00:55.080 --> 05:00:56.040
These thoughts of me.

2068
05:00:56.680 --> 05:00:57.200
It's just

2069
05:00:58.720 --> 05:00:59.720
Mm hmmm