April 16, 2025

(music) Let me bore your PERFORMANCE ANXIETY away | Jason Newland | 16th April 2025

(music) Let me bore your PERFORMANCE ANXIETY away | Jason Newland | 16th April 2025
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Hello, and welcome two Jasonnewland dot com. My name's Jason Newland.

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Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

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Today's sixteenth of April twenty twenty five. It is exactly

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two minutes to nine pm. I don't know what I'm

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telling you that I don't know. This is a requested

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recording for Maria. So I'm going to read you out

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the letter or the email that I received from my website.

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I won't read all of it out, but i'll read

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out the main bits and Hi, Jason, I'm writing to you. Firstly,

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thank you for the Bore You to Sleep podcast as

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well as a Bore You're paying Away one. They are

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brilliant and work well for me. I like the way

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the pain podcasts help distract with chronic pain symptoms, as

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I have both sciatica and or is it sciatica and

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ostapenia in the lumber spine. Secondly, please can I request

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a recording. I am a drama and recently have been

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feeling anxious and tense to the point where I now

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get pain in my shoulders. There is also a tendency

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to clench my jaw. This is effecting how I play

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and perform at gigs. I would like to be able

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to relax more and enjoy the performance rather than be

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rigid and tense, which comes across in some videos. I

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assume that you'll got videos of your performances when you

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say that, ask me, adding that she didn't write that

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in I started playing around eight years ago, being in

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several bands, but I haven't felt this anxious before. There's

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always been the adrenaline that helps with focus and clarity,

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which I think is necessary to perform. Please can I

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request something to help me relax more for performance anxiety.

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We have an important gig on a twenty seventh April,

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and I feel that I need to keep a grip

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on things. I'm sure you have some experience as a

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previous performer in comedy that you will understand. I'll stop

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now as I may have brought you to sleep. Now

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you ever bought me. Many thanks, Jason, and best wishes

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to you and Vinnie. So as for Maria from Maria, So,

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I was trying to figure how, I thik are how

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to go about this and make it available for a

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wider audience and you know, focus on the performance anxiety aspect,

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and I've just come out of the request. Well, I

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don't need It's fine, I've got it written down somewhere

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there is So there's a few ways, a few things

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I could sort of talk about, and so I'm just

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going to talk. I do this would be like he

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let me bore your performance anxiety away. The first thing

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to remember, I would say is you don't have to

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do this. I don't mean listen to me. You don't

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have to perform. You don't have to. So you're choosing

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to the reason I'm saying that is because the pressure

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is really possibly being put on by yourself. You're putting

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pressure on yourself which you don't need to. And it's

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not your first time. So if it's your first time performing,

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then you will have performance anxiety. And that's natural. It's

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just you know, there is no The only way to

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get good at anything is by doing it regularly, or

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you know, doing it a lot over a certain amount

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of time. So you've been doing it for six years,

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and for anyone else listening, however long you've been doing

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what you do. When it comes to performance anxiety, why

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is it? Whenever I think of performance anxiety, I think

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of myself and how rubbish I am in bed. It's weird,

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isn't it. It's like strange anyway, performance anxiety just to

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keep going back to, like the word floppy comes up again.

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So if you I've known people, I've not known many musicians.

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I've known a couple, but I've known hundreds of comedians

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over the years, not not these days, but in the past,

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and pretty much all of them seem to be have

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a degree of anxiety or nerves before going on stage.

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Even the ones that wouldn't say it, you could see

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them pacing. And then there was some that could literally

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have a conversation with someone at the bar and then

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hear the name called out and then just go on

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stage and do their act. Rich Hall was that kind

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of comic. I think Mark Thomas was another one that

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was kind of like that. He's just very relaxed this

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kind of day. I think it's something that I remember

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hearing Mark Thomas say, and it was just chatting at

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the beginning of his gig, and he said, oh, don't

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wor I haven't started yet. It's just that that confidence.

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So I think it's about confidence because when you do

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you know how to do what you're going to be doing.

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When you're on stage. I was absolutely I wasn't very

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good comedian at all. I had moments when I shone,

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But you know, I know this isn't about me, but

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I'm going to find a way to make it about

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me if I can so. I mean, I would never

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be able to give anyone advice on how to do comedy.

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But as far as standing on stage, I did do it.

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I'm still on stage over two hundred and fifty times.

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I got on stage, and it's it is a weird experience.

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I think when you're confident, and even for me it

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wasn't so much. I was confident that I was going

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to be good.

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But if I was confident that I remember what I

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was going to say, then I wouldn't have as many nerves.

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And if you're confident in a sense of you know

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what you're going to do, so your drummer, play the keyboard,

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you sing, whatever you're doing on if you're on performing,

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whatever it is, if you know how to do what

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you're doing, then there's a degree of confidence comes from

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that and that might be worth remembering. In the same

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way as if you're a driver, you don't have to

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think about every time you go to indicate or every

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time you put the clutch. I don't know if you

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have cars, but every time you operate a car, when

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you're driving, most of it's automatic because you have confidence

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you've done it before. It's almost like you can walk,

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perhaps from your bedroom to the bathroom in the middle

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of the night with all the lights off, maybe and

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know that you're gonna not wet the floor unless you're

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a bloke and wetting the floor is part of the plan. Really,

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this is just fun. But you've got that automatic process

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going on there. So I'm thinking, if you listen to

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me regularly, which I know Maria you do, you know

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how to relax. If you don't have If you don't

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know how, if someone's listening to this and I'm not

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sure how to relax, you can rehearse it in your mind.

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So if there's anxiety stress about something that's going to happen,

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then this is a guest. Tell me if I'm right

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or wrong. My guess is, when you think about that

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thing happening, you're not so far. You haven't been picturing

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it in a nice light. You haven't been seeing yourself

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on stage performing easily and naturally and happily. We were

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smile on your face because you're feeling good and you're

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not alone. You've got other people with you. I mean

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less of course you're on stage and you're a singer,

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but even then, if you were performing on stage, and

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generally you'd have someone if you're a talent content, you'd

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have someone in the audience that you're with, or if

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someone at the backstage, or if you're the show style

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of the show, you'll have people that are on your side,

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that have got your back. So when you imagine yourself

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on that stage, you can actually see yourself looking relaxed,

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because before before you start to listening to this, in

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order to have tension and anxiety and stress about the

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performance that's coming up, you need if you were thinking

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about that on imagining that, visualizing that time that's coming up,

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it couldn't It's impossible for it to have been pleasant

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because otherwise you wouldn't have anxiety. Because if you're thinking

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about it and it's place and it's a nice experience

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and you get around of applause and everyone's happy, there

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is no anxiety there. You might have the normal stage

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nerves just before you go on stage, but that's normal.

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It's normal it's like as you said, as Maria said here,

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it's like the adrenaline. It's a normal thing, but that's

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a different thing to be in anxious and stressful, you know,

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two weeks before the event, which means what you could

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do is prepare in your mind, rehearse in your mind

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the event. And a good thing about rehearsing is you

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can have it go anywhere you want. Now, if you

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want it to be a complete mess and a catastrophe

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and all go wrong, well there's no point really listening

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to this because you're possibly already doing that, you know, perhats,

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you're already imagining that, and that's why the anxiety is there.

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But the fact is, and if we go if we

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go extreme, I like to go extreme sometimes even if

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everything did go wrong, what does it matter really in

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the great scheme of things. You know, if you get

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on any instrument doesn't work, or the you know whatever,

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or there's a power cut, it's not your fault, is it?

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And the audience will understand. So it's not unless you

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get on stage and you know, say you're playing the drums,

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you let it get on stage and you literally put

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your trouse down to a big poop on the drums. Yeah,

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that's your fault, and you probably won't get asked back.

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Other than that, you're pretty much safe to just you know,

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feel relaxed that things are going to be all right.

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You got to get that image out of your head

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now if you can. My biggest do you want to know? Okay?

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Should I tell you this? My biggest thing because when

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I started doing comedy, I was twenty, and if you

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know anything about men when they're twenty, I'm another. I've

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had like bipolar and stuff. So I've always had problems

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controlling my moods and whatever. But it wasn't the only

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part of my body I couldn't control. When I was twenty,

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and I remember I was talking to someone at the

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bar that I liked, and it seemed like maybe there

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was you know, she was going to have a drink

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with me after I'd done the gig. And now I

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get my name called and I go on stage, so

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I have to I have to pull my shirt out

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and try and cover up my jeans or my trousers

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or whatever. Because I was there was no blood left

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in my head, That's what I'm saying. It was embarrassing.

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I thought I hope no one notices. And ironically, the

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most embarrassing part of that is the fact that no

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one did notice. Now, i'dn't want someone to notice, but

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that's crazy, but that actually happens, so it is. Sometimes

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it doesn't matter. I've seen the most ridiculous things happen

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in the past, Phnix being a really attention seeking At

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the moment, he's got a toy and he's just playing

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around with it and chucking it around. I think I've

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been particularly boring to him today. I've made three recordings,

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and I think I haven't given him the attention he needed.

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So if you hear that in the background, it's him

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playing with one of his toys. I can't help it.

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It's like, just I don't know what he There's only

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so much we can do. My neighbor knocked earlier, so

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I took him over to his flat. He lives opposite me,

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and he loves going in there. He's running around, having

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the time of his life, exploring the flat. And I

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think he's bored, bored being here with me because he

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knows every inch of this flat and none of it

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is exciting to him. But if he goes into a

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new place. It's just like an adventure. He's completely open

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minded to doing new things and just yeah, he's just

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he's excited. There's an excitement there. I sometimes wonder, though,

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imagine how good it would be to be like a dog,

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to be able to get excited over things. The only

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thing he doesn't like is being left alone. Literally, it's

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the only thing outside of that. He's not bothered, Nothing

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bothers him. He just doesn't like being on his own.

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I don't know why. I love being on my own.

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So we're not that, we're not that similar in that way.

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So you imagine you like you're you look forward to

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this next gig, that you've got, this next performance, And

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what's interesting about it? Why are you doing this in

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the first place? You know? Is it a chore? Is

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it something you want to do? Is it something you

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don't want to do? Because there's something you don't want

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to do. I'm not talking about this one particular gig

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coming up, but if generally you don't want to do it,

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you don't have to do You can't be arrested for

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not doing something like that. So if you do actually

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want to do it, why do you want to do it?

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What do you get out of it. He's really annoying

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me right now with all annoyes he's making. So is

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it fun? You're doing it because it's fun, I'm guessing.

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I mean, maybe there's a financial aspect to it, depending

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on who's listening and that, but it's fun. So if

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it's fun kind of isn't mature? It can't, there's no need.

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It's like sometimes with anxiety or with tension or with

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stress regarding something that's coming up, you know, it can

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be a question like, really, is is it helpful to

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have these feelings? Is it going to make you a

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better performer? I don't have the answer to that, but

237
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I do have the answer to that actually, But you know,

238
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I'm guessing that the difference between having two weeks of

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00:19:59.240 --> 00:20:02.680
what's not even too let's say, yea a week or

240
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whatever of looking forward, you know, looking towards something that's

241
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going to happen. You can feel negative about it and

242
00:20:13.599 --> 00:20:16.400
be worried, or you can feel positive about it and

243
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be excited. Which week is going to be more enjoyable? Hmm? Yeah,

244
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I'm pretty sure we know the answer to that one.

245
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So where's the benefit in choosing one over the other?

246
00:20:43.920 --> 00:20:47.880
Is there any benefit in feeling anything other than positive

247
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and looking forward to it. Is there a benefit to that?

248
00:20:55.119 --> 00:20:58.799
Maybe there is, you know, in reality, it may be

249
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a safe thing. Some people do have that idea of

250
00:21:05.960 --> 00:21:10.079
expect the worst so you mon't be disappointed kind of attitude,

251
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which I don't. I kind of understand in a way,

252
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but I don't think it's useful when it comes to performance.

253
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I'm not sure forever useful because it's going to affect,

254
00:21:26.640 --> 00:21:29.160
isn't it. I think imagine you.

255
00:21:29.119 --> 00:21:32.640
Go for a job interview and you if someone went

256
00:21:32.799 --> 00:21:36.039
it's if I went for a job interview and all

257
00:21:36.079 --> 00:21:38.160
I thought about was I'm not going to get the job,

258
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expecting to not get the job.

259
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How well am I going to perform in that job

260
00:21:46.279 --> 00:21:50.440
interview when I've got that in my mind for a

261
00:21:50.480 --> 00:21:54.480
few days before the job interview. How how well prepared

262
00:21:54.519 --> 00:21:57.960
am I going to be to show the best of

263
00:21:58.079 --> 00:22:04.240
me to be somebody that they would want to work with?

264
00:22:05.880 --> 00:22:09.640
Because that energy comes off, doesn't it. That energy shows.

265
00:22:11.599 --> 00:22:13.440
It's a weird thing about energy. You know, you ever

266
00:22:13.480 --> 00:22:17.119
walk into a room and two people you know, like

267
00:22:17.240 --> 00:22:19.279
you don't know anything ee's gone on, but you walk

268
00:22:19.319 --> 00:22:24.240
in and you know that they've been arguing because of

269
00:22:24.319 --> 00:22:27.559
this the energy. There's something going on. You don't know

270
00:22:27.559 --> 00:22:30.839
what's going on. There's a disagreement of some kind, but

271
00:22:30.880 --> 00:22:33.319
you got no idea what it is. You've literally walked

272
00:22:33.359 --> 00:22:39.240
into a quiet room and you can just they're not

273
00:22:39.240 --> 00:22:42.680
even looking at each other. You can tense it, tense it,

274
00:22:42.880 --> 00:22:47.880
sense it, sense the tension straight away because we admit

275
00:22:47.960 --> 00:22:53.720
that stuff, don't we. We We let that energy show,

276
00:22:55.640 --> 00:22:59.079
whether we mean to or not. So it affects us,

277
00:22:59.079 --> 00:23:03.559
it affects other people people. So there's also that to

278
00:23:03.559 --> 00:23:05.160
think about as well. So if you're in a band,

279
00:23:06.359 --> 00:23:14.359
it goes two ways. Your positivity, So feeling positive, feeling excited,

280
00:23:14.720 --> 00:23:23.359
looking forward to a really enjoyable performance will actually help

281
00:23:25.079 --> 00:23:28.920
not help the audience to enjoy it, it will also

282
00:23:29.079 --> 00:23:31.519
help the other members of the band. If you've got

283
00:23:31.559 --> 00:23:34.599
other members of the band to also enjoy it and

284
00:23:34.759 --> 00:23:38.920
bring out the best in them. As I said, even

285
00:23:38.960 --> 00:23:45.960
the audience will feel that they'll get that energy. I

286
00:23:46.000 --> 00:23:51.079
saw that in comedy sometimes. I actually saw some comedians

287
00:23:51.319 --> 00:24:02.920
and their confidence was more impressive than their jokes. There

288
00:24:03.000 --> 00:24:08.640
was just absolute confidence and it came across and the

289
00:24:08.720 --> 00:24:15.079
audience just felt it, and the confidence does often come

290
00:24:15.720 --> 00:24:23.079
from what comes from being confident, doesn't it ultimately from

291
00:24:23.839 --> 00:24:31.160
expecting things to go well, you're doing this for a reason.

292
00:24:32.079 --> 00:24:37.359
You know you can't. No one's making you do it. Well,

293
00:24:37.519 --> 00:24:41.839
you know, I'm guessing that's the case. So you're choosing.

294
00:24:45.039 --> 00:24:47.359
You don't have to do it, even if it was

295
00:24:47.400 --> 00:24:51.519
a paid gig and you were paid to be performing

296
00:24:51.559 --> 00:24:56.000
at the Hollywood Bowl or you know, the Wembley Arena

297
00:24:56.119 --> 00:25:00.440
or wherever a major arena is in your country, even

298
00:25:00.480 --> 00:25:04.359
if you were the headliner there, you don't have to perform.

299
00:25:04.640 --> 00:25:10.559
You don't have to turn up. I mean recently, there

300
00:25:10.640 --> 00:25:17.839
was a heavyweight title fight and the world champion and

301
00:25:17.880 --> 00:25:21.359
world champion didn't turn up. Well, he did not turn up,

302
00:25:21.400 --> 00:25:27.559
but he got ill about two days before the fight,

303
00:25:27.680 --> 00:25:32.720
so someone else came in and took their place, took

304
00:25:32.759 --> 00:25:39.799
his place. So you know, I've seen gigs where people

305
00:25:39.799 --> 00:25:45.160
haven't turned up or they've turned up late. It just

306
00:25:45.200 --> 00:25:51.559
sometimes happens, and you can choose whether you turn up

307
00:25:51.640 --> 00:25:55.640
or not. You don't have to do it, so it

308
00:25:55.720 --> 00:25:57.920
takes a pressure off. If you're doing this because you

309
00:25:58.000 --> 00:26:03.680
want to, you're doing it because you choose to you're

310
00:26:03.720 --> 00:26:09.799
doing it because it's fun, you're playing an instrument, or

311
00:26:09.799 --> 00:26:12.079
you're being on stage doing whatever it is. You're doing

312
00:26:12.480 --> 00:26:22.279
because it's fun, because you're i'm guessing excited to do it. Otherwise,

313
00:26:22.440 --> 00:26:24.640
why why would you do it? If you don't want to,

314
00:26:25.720 --> 00:26:31.880
there'd be no point. So my advice is, firstly, only

315
00:26:31.920 --> 00:26:38.799
do it if you want to. Really, there's just there's

316
00:26:38.839 --> 00:26:41.960
no point if if it's your job, if it's your career,

317
00:26:42.759 --> 00:26:48.119
then you know that's a different situation. But if you're

318
00:26:48.160 --> 00:26:51.680
doing it for fun, if you're doing it because you

319
00:26:51.920 --> 00:26:56.519
love doing it, hopefully you'd be doing it if it

320
00:26:56.559 --> 00:27:04.039
was your career as well. So it's a choice. How

321
00:27:04.079 --> 00:27:06.759
do you view it. It's something I used to do

322
00:27:06.960 --> 00:27:14.000
when I had this job once where I liked part

323
00:27:14.039 --> 00:27:20.440
of the job, but I absolutely detested another part of it.

324
00:27:21.799 --> 00:27:25.079
So the early part of the evening I really didn't

325
00:27:25.240 --> 00:27:29.200
like it. So I was dealing with the public. Sometimes

326
00:27:29.200 --> 00:27:33.839
it went really easy, sometimes it was very complicated and difficult,

327
00:27:34.039 --> 00:27:39.119
dealing with drunk people and whatever. Later in the evening

328
00:27:40.160 --> 00:27:44.519
was the part that I enjoyed. So what I used

329
00:27:44.519 --> 00:27:53.559
to do is I would imagine and I do this

330
00:27:53.759 --> 00:27:57.160
on the way to the place. And I wish I'd

331
00:27:57.160 --> 00:27:59.000
done this when I was doing gigs because it might

332
00:27:59.000 --> 00:28:02.200
have helped, But I didn't. I didn't know anything about

333
00:28:02.200 --> 00:28:10.440
this stuff back then. I mean literally the first time.

334
00:28:10.599 --> 00:28:13.880
The last time I did a gig was nineteen ninety

335
00:28:14.000 --> 00:28:21.000
eight January, and the first two hypnosis books I bought

336
00:28:22.480 --> 00:28:28.000
was January nineteen ninety eight. The first hypnosis training I

337
00:28:28.079 --> 00:28:37.000
did was Yeah, nineteen eighty eight, nineteen ninety eight as well,

338
00:28:39.400 --> 00:28:43.160
So yeah, BlimE me. So it kind of it's weird

339
00:28:43.200 --> 00:28:47.359
as went from that to this, although this has lasted

340
00:28:47.400 --> 00:28:57.079
a lot longer. What has lasted a while, isn't it?

341
00:28:58.000 --> 00:29:08.319
Woh So, what I used to do is I would

342
00:29:08.319 --> 00:29:15.200
imagine the end of the night, right, everything's done, I

343
00:29:15.240 --> 00:29:25.559
was home in bed, relaxed, and I'd go backwards in

344
00:29:25.640 --> 00:29:31.440
my mind. I'd go backwards through the whole evening, including

345
00:29:31.480 --> 00:29:33.680
what I did in the evening, what I did, you know,

346
00:29:33.920 --> 00:29:36.079
during the evening, what I did right at the beginning

347
00:29:36.079 --> 00:29:38.000
of the evening, the part that I didn't really look

348
00:29:38.039 --> 00:29:42.119
forward to, and I'd skip all the way back to

349
00:29:42.240 --> 00:29:45.119
the front, to the beginning, and then i'd go all

350
00:29:45.160 --> 00:29:49.319
the way forward to the end and notice how relaxed

351
00:29:49.359 --> 00:29:54.240
I am at the end of it, and also notice

352
00:29:54.240 --> 00:29:56.920
how relaxed you are why you think of it as well,

353
00:29:58.519 --> 00:30:02.240
because if you feel relaxed while you're imagining yourself feeling relaxed,

354
00:30:04.799 --> 00:30:08.480
it's a pretty good I guess it's quite a nice

355
00:30:08.519 --> 00:30:13.400
balance to have, isn't it. But then imagining yourself feeling relaxed,

356
00:30:14.039 --> 00:30:16.519
what else can it really do but cause you to

357
00:30:16.519 --> 00:30:21.039
feel relaxed? Is that would be weird? Otherwise, wouldn't it.

358
00:30:21.079 --> 00:30:24.079
Imagine sitting on the edge of the bed all scrunched up,

359
00:30:24.160 --> 00:30:29.160
your jaw tents, your shoulders tense, like, yeah, I'm really relaxed.

360
00:30:29.200 --> 00:30:34.559
Now I can imagine myself feeling relaxed. That doesn't work,

361
00:30:34.599 --> 00:30:40.839
does it. So when you imagine yourself on stage with

362
00:30:40.960 --> 00:30:46.640
all the different parts of your body, just loose your eyes,

363
00:30:47.640 --> 00:30:56.240
just calm your face, peaceful your jaw. I mean, the

364
00:30:56.319 --> 00:30:58.240
only thing really is going to happen with your mouth

365
00:30:58.279 --> 00:31:03.240
and your jaw. It's probably smiling because you're enjoying yourself.

366
00:31:08.920 --> 00:31:14.640
And also you'll be noticing how other people are enjoying themselves.

367
00:31:21.599 --> 00:31:23.680
And there's a sense I don't know about you, but

368
00:31:23.720 --> 00:31:27.920
there's a sense of when you imagine that you imagine

369
00:31:28.599 --> 00:31:38.480
performing on that occasion, and when you realize how relaxed

370
00:31:38.759 --> 00:31:44.880
you are as you imagine it, and then you realize

371
00:31:44.920 --> 00:31:49.920
how relaxed do you feel imagining how relaxed you will

372
00:31:49.960 --> 00:32:01.000
be on that occasion when you're performing, And imagine on

373
00:32:01.119 --> 00:32:05.160
that night or that day when you're about to perform,

374
00:32:05.519 --> 00:32:09.640
you could remember how relaxed you were back now when

375
00:32:09.680 --> 00:32:14.440
you were thinking about performing or about to go on stage.

376
00:32:19.400 --> 00:32:21.559
And although it may be a bit of adrenaline there,

377
00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:25.960
it's a different type. It's like a relaxed adrenaline. It's

378
00:32:26.039 --> 00:32:32.960
almost ready to get going. You see, it's a car.

379
00:32:34.759 --> 00:32:36.519
You know these races. I don't really watch them, but

380
00:32:36.559 --> 00:32:39.359
I've seen them. How do you seen them? If you

381
00:32:39.359 --> 00:32:41.599
don't watch them? No, I mean I've seen it, but

382
00:32:41.640 --> 00:32:44.359
I don't like follow them so much. But you see

383
00:32:44.720 --> 00:32:48.680
these racing cars and they're ready to take off. I

384
00:32:48.720 --> 00:32:53.519
mean they go from zero to sixty in like seconds.

385
00:32:53.640 --> 00:33:00.200
They'd really fast. But they're not holding the the the

386
00:33:00.279 --> 00:33:02.799
whatlds practically are in their face something, but they're not

387
00:33:02.960 --> 00:33:06.920
holding them really like ah, and the cars not like oh, really,

388
00:33:07.440 --> 00:33:16.640
everything's relaxed. Everyone's relaxed. The same with tennis, you see

389
00:33:16.640 --> 00:33:20.279
people a ready and they look relaxed at the beginning

390
00:33:20.319 --> 00:33:22.920
of the game when it comes to serving. When it

391
00:33:23.000 --> 00:33:28.160
comes to that. You see people playing snooker, they look relaxed.

392
00:33:30.720 --> 00:33:35.480
People at the beginning of a football game. Even people

393
00:33:35.519 --> 00:33:40.759
in boxing, quite often they look fairly relaxed, even though

394
00:33:40.799 --> 00:33:43.799
they're about to punch each other. There's a degree of

395
00:33:43.960 --> 00:33:48.160
like they've done everything that needs to be done. I've

396
00:33:48.200 --> 00:33:50.880
heard a lot of boxer say this, that there's no

397
00:33:51.079 --> 00:33:54.519
nerves on the night because they've done all the work

398
00:33:54.559 --> 00:33:59.359
in the gym. This is now time to just have fun.

399
00:34:03.200 --> 00:34:10.000
So they've done the rehearsing, they've done, they're preparing, the

400
00:34:10.079 --> 00:34:15.760
mental preparation, the imagining the outcome being really good, positive,

401
00:34:16.360 --> 00:34:22.920
going really well. You've imagined that you get to that

402
00:34:23.079 --> 00:34:30.440
time and you just get on stage and everything goes

403
00:34:30.719 --> 00:34:35.000
really nice. There's no reason for it not to. It

404
00:34:35.039 --> 00:34:39.320
really is. Everything goes nice. You do what you need

405
00:34:39.400 --> 00:34:43.679
to do, you do what you want to do, you

406
00:34:43.760 --> 00:34:47.800
do what you're there to do, you do what you've

407
00:34:47.840 --> 00:34:57.280
done before, and it's a groove. It just there's a

408
00:34:57.320 --> 00:35:02.000
groove that you fit into where it doesn't take really

409
00:35:02.119 --> 00:35:09.360
much thought, just need to be there. It's almost like

410
00:35:09.480 --> 00:35:11.960
you if you're in a band, you're all on the

411
00:35:11.960 --> 00:35:17.360
same coach, you're all going traveling to the same destination together.

412
00:35:20.639 --> 00:35:24.639
You're just sitting in different seats. You're still going together,

413
00:35:24.679 --> 00:35:35.239
You're still traveling together. So going back to rehearsing, feeling

414
00:35:35.280 --> 00:35:41.719
relaxed in your face, your jaw, your neck, your shoulders,

415
00:35:42.559 --> 00:35:51.960
your arms, your fingers, your legs, your feet, your back,

416
00:35:52.719 --> 00:35:59.440
your chest, and your stomach, your throat, your mouth, and

417
00:36:00.000 --> 00:36:05.679
notice that if you imagine feeling that way and looking

418
00:36:05.840 --> 00:36:18.159
forward to that event that's coming up, imagine how a

419
00:36:18.199 --> 00:36:21.400
relaxed you're going to be when you're on that stage

420
00:36:25.039 --> 00:36:28.519
enjoying yourself, because that's the ultimate thing, isn't it. You

421
00:36:28.559 --> 00:36:33.119
get to enjoy yourself. You get to have fun, which

422
00:36:33.159 --> 00:36:37.159
is I would argue the main reason to do it

423
00:36:38.400 --> 00:36:44.480
to have fun. And I know that sometimes I've got

424
00:36:44.480 --> 00:36:46.559
a tendency in the past, I used to clench my

425
00:36:46.679 --> 00:36:53.519
jaw quite a bit, and sometimes you've got to just

426
00:36:53.599 --> 00:37:00.119
remember because when you're smiling, when you're feeling good, when

427
00:37:00.159 --> 00:37:06.880
you're thinking of something funny, it relaxes your jaw or

428
00:37:07.639 --> 00:37:11.039
there's a different type of tension like you're smiling. It's

429
00:37:11.079 --> 00:37:20.440
a different feeling and it loosens the jaw. It's almost

430
00:37:20.519 --> 00:37:27.840
like the antidote attention. And there was the old thing,

431
00:37:27.960 --> 00:37:31.440
wasn't it like, if you want to relax on stage,

432
00:37:31.480 --> 00:37:36.360
imagine the audience is naked. Now. As I said when

433
00:37:36.400 --> 00:37:40.480
I first started on stage, I was twenty, Imagining a

434
00:37:40.559 --> 00:37:42.960
naked audience was not going to make me feel relaxed.

435
00:37:43.599 --> 00:37:50.519
I was going to do the opposite. But you can

436
00:37:54.119 --> 00:37:59.559
see something that's funny. Maybe notice something that's funny. Maybe

437
00:37:59.639 --> 00:38:04.880
notice certain mistake that one of your band members, if

438
00:38:04.920 --> 00:38:07.360
you're in a band, and notice something that they've done

439
00:38:07.360 --> 00:38:11.400
that has made you giggle a little bit inside, not

440
00:38:11.559 --> 00:38:17.920
like full on laughing, but just like ah, or maybe

441
00:38:17.960 --> 00:38:22.719
you can even see the funny side of actually the

442
00:38:22.840 --> 00:38:27.320
idea that you were nervous about even doing this. Why

443
00:38:27.360 --> 00:38:30.119
would you be stressed over doing this when you enjoy

444
00:38:30.239 --> 00:38:34.960
doing it? You know, maybe saved attention for doing things

445
00:38:34.960 --> 00:38:38.400
you don't like doing. If you have to have that,

446
00:38:40.159 --> 00:38:42.440
I mean I would argue maybe you not have it

447
00:38:42.480 --> 00:38:55.480
then either. Yeah, that's a weird concept. Isn't it feel

448
00:38:55.519 --> 00:39:05.079
more relaxed generally? So I guess there's lots of different

449
00:39:05.199 --> 00:39:12.360
things you could do to help you to change how

450
00:39:12.440 --> 00:39:19.119
you feel. One thing you could do is actually see

451
00:39:19.159 --> 00:39:26.079
if you play an instrument Maria plays the drums. What

452
00:39:26.119 --> 00:39:31.480
you can do is or if you sing even you

453
00:39:31.519 --> 00:39:34.159
can focus on different parts of your body while you

454
00:39:34.199 --> 00:39:39.360
play that instrument. And I want to think of the

455
00:39:39.719 --> 00:39:42.800
as your voice as an instrument as well. So or

456
00:39:44.960 --> 00:39:47.920
in some ways it's even easier if you've got movement,

457
00:39:51.400 --> 00:39:55.760
because when you move, if you think about tai chi

458
00:39:55.920 --> 00:40:01.400
or chigong, a lot of it is about movement and

459
00:40:01.440 --> 00:40:08.719
the energy. There's a real energy changes and it feels nice.

460
00:40:09.559 --> 00:40:17.119
So for example, if you're if you're holding an instrument,

461
00:40:19.000 --> 00:40:22.000
notice how it feels. You could like practice it without

462
00:40:22.039 --> 00:40:25.280
the instrument in your hands or without the drum. You

463
00:40:25.480 --> 00:40:28.199
can imagine there's a drum sticks and there's a drum

464
00:40:28.239 --> 00:40:31.400
in front of you, and just move in your arms

465
00:40:32.599 --> 00:40:35.559
and notice how good it feels in your arms, how

466
00:40:35.599 --> 00:40:37.960
good it feels in your chest and in your back,

467
00:40:38.960 --> 00:40:41.960
Just that movement. I'm doing it now and pretending on

468
00:40:42.039 --> 00:40:45.440
playing the drums. Did I ever tell you I used

469
00:40:45.440 --> 00:40:49.480
to actually play the drums in the cecredets? I did?

470
00:40:49.880 --> 00:40:54.519
I used to perform it was weird. Thousands of people

471
00:40:54.559 --> 00:40:56.000
because he used to be used to do it down

472
00:40:56.000 --> 00:40:59.119
the street like at carnivals and things like that and

473
00:40:59.159 --> 00:41:03.480
Trafalgar Day and there will literally be thousands upon thousands

474
00:41:03.519 --> 00:41:08.679
of people. And the good thing I liked is by

475
00:41:08.800 --> 00:41:16.000
focusing on the drum, by focusing on the vibration, I

476
00:41:16.039 --> 00:41:23.920
found it quite relaxing. And also knowing that I wasn't

477
00:41:23.920 --> 00:41:27.039
the only one there. There was people like always have

478
00:41:27.039 --> 00:41:33.320
played the bugle as well at some point, and it

479
00:41:33.360 --> 00:41:36.880
wasn't just me. There was other people and there's other secredets,

480
00:41:36.920 --> 00:41:42.360
so there was what twenty of us maybe more, or marching,

481
00:41:44.719 --> 00:41:48.880
so I wasn't alone doing it. But even if I

482
00:41:48.920 --> 00:41:52.400
had been alone, if I'm marching, if I'm in a

483
00:41:53.639 --> 00:41:56.639
situation where there's other people about, you're not on your own.

484
00:41:56.960 --> 00:42:03.960
Even if you're on stage in an arena and you've

485
00:42:04.000 --> 00:42:07.679
got ten twenty thousand people watching you, you're not alone

486
00:42:07.719 --> 00:42:13.920
because it's twenty thousand people there and you don't really

487
00:42:14.000 --> 00:42:21.679
need to worry about messing up because they're there. They're

488
00:42:21.719 --> 00:42:27.119
already there, and they're there for a reason because they

489
00:42:27.159 --> 00:42:29.960
want to have fun, they want to enjoy themselves, and

490
00:42:30.000 --> 00:42:35.760
they're going to feel that sense of pleasure from you

491
00:42:35.920 --> 00:42:40.800
when you're on stage, because that will radiate from you,

492
00:42:41.840 --> 00:42:44.559
and you'll also get those good vibes from the audience

493
00:42:45.360 --> 00:42:50.239
towards you. So it's like positivity coming in, positivity going out.

494
00:42:51.320 --> 00:42:58.679
It's like the endless stream of calm. And I want

495
00:42:58.679 --> 00:43:04.480
to go on stage now. It feels quite nice. Oh

496
00:43:04.559 --> 00:43:07.519
and the good thing about imagining, A good thing about

497
00:43:07.639 --> 00:43:19.039
rehearsing in your mind is every performance is great. It

498
00:43:19.079 --> 00:43:20.679
can be as great as you want it to be,

499
00:43:24.519 --> 00:43:29.559
which I think is pretty cool. It can be as

500
00:43:29.639 --> 00:43:35.840
groovy as you wish, You can be as talented as

501
00:43:35.840 --> 00:43:45.800
you want. Everything can go perfectly, but most of all,

502
00:43:47.840 --> 00:43:54.679
you can enjoy it. I really enjoy the whole event,

503
00:43:55.880 --> 00:44:03.239
including the build up, because instead of I mean, if

504
00:44:03.239 --> 00:44:07.840
you change dreading something to looking forward to it with excitement,

505
00:44:08.360 --> 00:44:12.760
optimism and actually feeling really good, I know which one

506
00:44:12.760 --> 00:44:17.519
I'd choose. I don't think the you know, dreading something

507
00:44:17.639 --> 00:44:28.480
is a good place to be, really looking forward to

508
00:44:28.519 --> 00:44:32.519
something positively and realizing that you're doing what you can

509
00:44:32.519 --> 00:44:39.360
already do. Now. You know, if you play the drums

510
00:44:39.719 --> 00:44:42.480
and you get on stage and they suddenly say to you, oh,

511
00:44:42.519 --> 00:44:47.159
by the way, can you play the Can you play

512
00:44:47.159 --> 00:44:53.920
the violin instead? Then yeah, I mean if you don't

513
00:44:53.920 --> 00:44:57.000
play the violin, then that would be that wouldn't be

514
00:44:57.239 --> 00:45:01.800
a great situation. But that's not going to happen, is it.

515
00:45:03.760 --> 00:45:06.239
You know what you're playing, you know what you're doing

516
00:45:06.559 --> 00:45:10.559
when you get on stage. If you're listening to this

517
00:45:10.599 --> 00:45:14.719
because you've got a play coming up, just remember the words.

518
00:45:16.079 --> 00:45:17.719
If you know what you're going to say, you know

519
00:45:17.760 --> 00:45:20.599
what you're going to do. Actors help each other out,

520
00:45:20.639 --> 00:45:25.639
don't they. And it's quite weird. I noticed this I

521
00:45:25.679 --> 00:45:29.159
used to do. I used to do drama at school.

522
00:45:30.280 --> 00:45:32.480
I was I wasn't very good at it. I used

523
00:45:32.519 --> 00:45:34.920
to just play around. I didn't really take it seriously.

524
00:45:35.920 --> 00:45:44.800
But I noticed that people would they wouldn't necessarily remember

525
00:45:45.880 --> 00:45:50.320
everything they had to say until they were on stage,

526
00:45:52.480 --> 00:45:56.119
and then they got into the groove a bit like

527
00:45:56.159 --> 00:46:00.719
a say, like a CD, or like a a record,

528
00:46:02.199 --> 00:46:06.880
like an old vinyl, get into that groove like a

529
00:46:06.960 --> 00:46:10.480
train on the tracks. There's nothing to do. You just

530
00:46:10.599 --> 00:46:13.280
keep going and you're going to end up where you

531
00:46:13.320 --> 00:46:22.480
want to end up. And I don't know, does it

532
00:46:22.559 --> 00:46:24.920
help remembering why you're doing it? In the first place.

533
00:46:26.360 --> 00:46:31.519
Does it help remembering that you don't have to do anything,

534
00:46:33.440 --> 00:46:38.360
You're doing it because you want to do it, and

535
00:46:38.440 --> 00:46:42.400
you always have a choice. Always, even in the most

536
00:46:42.440 --> 00:46:47.280
extreme situations, we always have a choice. Sometimes, you know,

537
00:46:48.400 --> 00:46:51.880
it makes a lot of sense to make certain choices.

538
00:46:52.559 --> 00:46:55.440
But ultimately, if it's if it's something, do you want

539
00:46:55.480 --> 00:46:57.880
to do it or not. If you want to do it,

540
00:46:57.960 --> 00:47:03.440
do it, enjoy it, and break look forward to it.

541
00:47:03.639 --> 00:47:10.840
Nothing to lose, what is there to lose? I mean,

542
00:47:11.079 --> 00:47:14.320
you know, I'm know I mentioned earlier, like doing a

543
00:47:14.360 --> 00:47:18.679
pool on a drum set, that that probably wouldn't go

544
00:47:18.719 --> 00:47:23.360
down so well. I just remember the see caredets I

545
00:47:23.360 --> 00:47:27.360
was trying to get out of I didn't want to

546
00:47:27.400 --> 00:47:33.239
march anymore. But it didn't work the hand of me

547
00:47:33.320 --> 00:47:35.599
a violin. No, they didn't. I don't know why I

548
00:47:35.599 --> 00:47:41.320
said that. That was weird though, being in the middle

549
00:47:41.360 --> 00:47:45.920
of town, you know, playing the drums and just seeing

550
00:47:45.960 --> 00:47:48.639
all these people I went to school with. It's very weird.

551
00:47:49.360 --> 00:47:55.199
It it broke through the confidence that I didn't know.

552
00:47:58.840 --> 00:48:01.000
It wasn't even it got to the point where I

553
00:48:01.039 --> 00:48:05.119
just didn't care. I'd do it, and maybe I was

554
00:48:05.199 --> 00:48:07.360
to start. The first time I ever marched through the

555
00:48:07.440 --> 00:48:16.480
town knowing that my classmates, maybe teachers, family members were

556
00:48:16.519 --> 00:48:21.280
going to be watching at the side, and it was

557
00:48:21.320 --> 00:48:29.400
a little bit oh but after a little while of

558
00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:32.840
doing it, I mean within the first time, after a

559
00:48:32.840 --> 00:48:38.159
few minutes, and it's like, I don't care. It just

560
00:48:38.199 --> 00:48:41.119
doesn't matter, And they're probably in reality, they're not really

561
00:48:41.159 --> 00:48:44.079
looking at me anyway. There's all these other people that

562
00:48:44.119 --> 00:48:47.679
are looking at So the parents of the other kids

563
00:48:47.719 --> 00:48:50.880
would be looking at them, their kids, the friends of

564
00:48:50.920 --> 00:48:55.639
the other kids, we're looking at their kids. None of

565
00:48:55.639 --> 00:48:57.800
my teachers liked me anyway, so they probably weren't looking

566
00:48:57.840 --> 00:49:03.079
at meerhaps hope and it will trip over. I don't

567
00:49:03.079 --> 00:49:07.920
know why I say that. I don't know if they would. Plus,

568
00:49:08.079 --> 00:49:12.800
I had these big drumsticks that I could defend myself

569
00:49:12.880 --> 00:49:16.079
with if I had to. So if a ninja just

570
00:49:16.559 --> 00:49:20.079
jumped down all dressed in black with a i'm gonna say,

571
00:49:20.079 --> 00:49:24.519
samurai sword, I could just fend them off with my drumsticks.

572
00:49:26.679 --> 00:49:28.239
That's the kind of things I used to think about

573
00:49:28.280 --> 00:49:32.639
back then. Admittedly I suppose I still do, because I

574
00:49:32.719 --> 00:49:42.800
just said it. I never understood why. I just wonder

575
00:49:42.880 --> 00:49:49.760
how drums, how they got to do it, how they

576
00:49:49.800 --> 00:49:59.039
came about probably not relevant, but just how it's weird,

577
00:49:59.079 --> 00:50:05.079
isn't it How things come about over time? I mean,

578
00:50:05.119 --> 00:50:07.400
I don't know it was an animal skin to start with.

579
00:50:07.440 --> 00:50:14.639
I suppose wasn't it. Maybe I don't know. Maybe they

580
00:50:14.679 --> 00:50:20.199
were going through a drought, the people were hungry. They

581
00:50:20.239 --> 00:50:23.800
had a cow that was hungry, so they just like

582
00:50:24.079 --> 00:50:25.840
trying to make the cow feel a bit better, and

583
00:50:25.840 --> 00:50:30.239
they patting him on the back or whatever because he's hungry,

584
00:50:30.239 --> 00:50:33.559
he's hot. You know, he's like collow inside, isn't it.

585
00:50:33.599 --> 00:50:38.119
And there's like a drum kind of sound. It's like, oh,

586
00:50:38.199 --> 00:50:43.840
this is good, and decides always sounds better with sticks

587
00:50:45.519 --> 00:50:50.360
and ended up walking around of a cow wrapped around

588
00:50:50.400 --> 00:50:55.880
his neck. I imagine a cow would get a bit

589
00:50:55.880 --> 00:51:03.360
annoyed after a while. But don't mess with a cow.

590
00:51:03.400 --> 00:51:08.760
They will get their own back. Allays out for revenge, spiteful,

591
00:51:11.000 --> 00:51:14.079
don't honestly, don't get on the wrong side of the cow.

592
00:51:15.840 --> 00:51:26.440
Tricksters and never forget. So this is turned weird. I

593
00:51:26.440 --> 00:51:30.719
can I'm moving on. Something you can do with the

594
00:51:30.960 --> 00:51:34.440
if you play an instrument, as in Maria plays a drums.

595
00:51:34.480 --> 00:51:37.840
If you play a trumpet, you play the guitar, maybe

596
00:51:37.880 --> 00:51:44.239
you sing whatever. You can actually rehearse in real time,

597
00:51:45.360 --> 00:51:50.199
not on stage, but you can rehearse just like you

598
00:51:50.239 --> 00:51:54.559
do rehearse the instrument. And notice, so if you play

599
00:51:54.559 --> 00:52:03.599
the guitar, every time you strum the keys, strong the keys,

600
00:52:03.599 --> 00:52:08.960
strong the strings rather or press on the strings. It

601
00:52:09.079 --> 00:52:14.639
sends a signal few to relax, to feel confident, to

602
00:52:14.719 --> 00:52:20.039
be focused, and to play at your best. But at

603
00:52:20.039 --> 00:52:26.920
the same time feel relaxed and have that focus that

604
00:52:26.960 --> 00:52:30.119
you need. So you're not thinking about anything else because

605
00:52:30.159 --> 00:52:34.360
nothing else is relative, nothing else is important in that moment,

606
00:52:36.760 --> 00:52:43.599
just what you're doing. And when it comes to the

607
00:52:43.719 --> 00:52:49.360
night of performing, you're already prepared for that. And as

608
00:52:49.400 --> 00:52:51.679
soon as you even look at the instrument that you're

609
00:52:51.679 --> 00:53:01.440
going to be playing, you feel relaxed. I'm you sit down.

610
00:53:01.599 --> 00:53:06.760
If you're sitting down, it gets you into that zone.

611
00:53:07.159 --> 00:53:12.239
It's almost like you become part of the instrument. You

612
00:53:12.320 --> 00:53:17.039
become part of the guitar, you become part of the trumpet,

613
00:53:19.119 --> 00:53:24.880
or if you're dancing, you become part of the song

614
00:53:25.599 --> 00:53:31.960
of the stage. If you're performing, you almost like you

615
00:53:32.000 --> 00:53:36.599
become part of the audience. There's that energy all joined together,

616
00:53:36.960 --> 00:53:41.880
and we are all literally joined together by energy. We're

617
00:53:41.920 --> 00:53:47.519
not really separate. Everyone listening to this is connected to

618
00:53:47.559 --> 00:53:53.559
me by energy. We're all connected together in a weird way.

619
00:53:53.920 --> 00:54:00.519
We're not in a Yeah, I mean it's I just

620
00:54:00.599 --> 00:54:03.079
can't make of a movie centerpede. So let's move on

621
00:54:03.119 --> 00:54:07.159
from that. But I'm just saying we're all connected in

622
00:54:07.239 --> 00:54:13.920
an energetic sense, and there's energy through voices, energy through words,

623
00:54:14.840 --> 00:54:18.599
and even though I am possibly in a completely different

624
00:54:18.599 --> 00:54:22.719
country to where you are, my words and my voice

625
00:54:23.360 --> 00:54:36.239
can reach you calm you allow you to feel relaxed

626
00:54:36.320 --> 00:54:49.760
and present and also reconnect with the joy do you

627
00:54:49.960 --> 00:55:00.760
have for performing, Because there's something quite special about out performing.

628
00:55:01.159 --> 00:55:06.599
You know, there's there's a there's a buzz that I

629
00:55:06.679 --> 00:55:12.320
haven't done everything in the world, but I think a

630
00:55:12.360 --> 00:55:15.159
lot of people would agree that there's a certain buzz

631
00:55:15.239 --> 00:55:19.159
that comes from performing in front of an audience that

632
00:55:19.199 --> 00:55:25.840
you just won't get anywhere else. And of course it's

633
00:55:25.880 --> 00:55:28.559
going to be different for different people. It's also going

634
00:55:28.599 --> 00:55:30.800
to be different depending on what you do, but there's

635
00:55:30.840 --> 00:55:38.320
going to be similarities whether you're in the band, whether

636
00:55:38.360 --> 00:55:44.840
you're in a play, whether it's a carol service, whether

637
00:55:44.920 --> 00:55:48.840
it's even if it was some kind of political debate

638
00:55:49.559 --> 00:55:52.639
or you're doing a spelling bee or something like that.

639
00:55:52.920 --> 00:55:59.400
You're on stage in front of people, and there's an

640
00:55:59.519 --> 00:56:08.000
energy at it, there's an excitement about it. It can

641
00:56:08.039 --> 00:56:16.360
be quite moorish. I mean, some people never want to quit,

642
00:56:16.440 --> 00:56:20.039
They never want to stop performing. Some people performing until

643
00:56:20.039 --> 00:56:23.000
they're in their nineties if they can, because they love

644
00:56:23.039 --> 00:56:31.079
it so much. I mean, there's actors that are still

645
00:56:31.119 --> 00:56:41.519
performing in their nineties when acts Arose is about one

646
00:56:41.639 --> 00:56:45.960
hundred and five is not. I'm sure he's not. But

647
00:56:46.320 --> 00:56:49.599
while they're Rolling Stones, they're all in their eighties, aren't they.

648
00:56:50.719 --> 00:57:01.639
They're still performing. I'm not going to say anything about

649
00:57:01.639 --> 00:57:06.039
the Rolling Stones. I'm not gonna imagine Axel Rose fans.

650
00:57:06.840 --> 00:57:09.840
Dear Jason, I was with you until a bit about

651
00:57:09.840 --> 00:57:12.280
Axl Rose. I have been a fan of his since

652
00:57:12.400 --> 00:57:15.320
nineteen twenty three. How dare you say that he's old?

653
00:57:17.360 --> 00:57:28.559
Visualize so visualizing it, you know, the visualizing imagining that

654
00:57:28.760 --> 00:57:36.400
performance going really well is something that you can do

655
00:57:36.559 --> 00:57:42.639
over and over and over again, rehearsing it over and

656
00:57:42.719 --> 00:57:46.639
over and over to the point where it feels. It

657
00:57:46.679 --> 00:57:51.239
may feel like you've already performed, you've already done it,

658
00:57:52.880 --> 00:57:58.559
like you know how it feels after the event you

659
00:57:58.760 --> 00:58:01.639
skipped forward all the way to the end and you're

660
00:58:01.639 --> 00:58:06.480
looking back thinking, oh, that's really good. I'm so pleased

661
00:58:07.280 --> 00:58:15.920
it went so well, and then you're looking forward to

662
00:58:16.000 --> 00:58:24.840
the next one. And of course there's something to be

663
00:58:24.880 --> 00:58:31.760
said for being prepared, so you can also include that

664
00:58:31.920 --> 00:58:37.039
in any visualizations you do. Being prepared for doing it,

665
00:58:38.679 --> 00:58:43.960
knowing what you're going to do, rehearsing, just being prepared.

666
00:58:46.000 --> 00:58:53.440
I want you to know you're prepared. Everything else. As

667
00:58:53.440 --> 00:58:58.519
I say, it's just cheese. Actually, I'm not sure if

668
00:58:58.519 --> 00:59:04.760
anyone's ever said that. What was it? Just chocolate? Just coffee, gravy.

669
00:59:04.840 --> 00:59:10.119
That's it, just gravy. That's what the young people used

670
00:59:10.119 --> 00:59:20.280
to say twenty five years ago. You could also prepare

671
00:59:20.360 --> 00:59:33.920
yourself by saying some affirmations, reminding yourself that you can

672
00:59:33.960 --> 00:59:37.800
feel calm, reminding yourself that you know what you're doing,

673
00:59:38.239 --> 00:59:41.159
and reminding yourself that there's a reason you're doing this

674
00:59:42.000 --> 00:59:46.599
and you want to do it. You want to be

675
00:59:46.719 --> 00:59:50.920
up there on stage, that's why you're doing it. You

676
00:59:50.920 --> 00:59:57.199
want to enjoy it. So an example, I suppose of

677
00:59:57.239 --> 01:00:01.400
an affirmation, I'll give you a few, but you can

678
01:00:01.440 --> 01:00:05.239
think upside of your own you think up something that

679
01:00:05.440 --> 01:00:12.920
suits you personally, maybe something to do with your own

680
01:00:14.119 --> 01:00:22.440
particular performance situation. So for example, if you're playing the drums,

681
01:00:25.760 --> 01:00:33.360
you can just you know, say, my shoulders and my

682
01:00:33.480 --> 01:00:40.639
jaw feel relaxed. My shoulders and my jaw feel relaxed.

683
01:00:44.840 --> 01:00:48.519
If you're in a play, you can just say to yourself,

684
01:00:49.039 --> 01:01:06.320
I remember everything I need to remember. There's more general

685
01:01:06.519 --> 01:01:17.800
things like I embrace my performance, feeling calm and feeling positive.

686
01:01:25.639 --> 01:01:28.159
And it's another this is one that you can actually

687
01:01:28.239 --> 01:01:39.840
really focus on before and during the performance. So you

688
01:01:39.880 --> 01:01:43.639
can do this as you practice, also in your mind

689
01:01:44.320 --> 01:01:52.840
and as you practice in real life. Each time I play,

690
01:01:54.559 --> 01:02:06.280
I relax more deeply into the music. Each time I play,

691
01:02:07.119 --> 01:02:19.559
I relax more deeply into the music. Because ultimately, if

692
01:02:19.639 --> 01:02:25.960
you're in a band, or if you're an acquire, if

693
01:02:26.000 --> 01:02:30.760
you're in a play, if you're dancing, whatever, you become

694
01:02:30.960 --> 01:02:39.960
part of that The instrument becomes part of that performance,

695
01:02:40.639 --> 01:02:45.400
and you become part of the instrument. Therefore, you become

696
01:02:45.519 --> 01:02:51.039
part of the performance. If you're dancing you become part

697
01:02:51.159 --> 01:03:01.599
of the dancing. If you're in a play, you're also

698
01:03:01.760 --> 01:03:08.199
part of that play. You become the play with other people.

699
01:03:13.840 --> 01:03:22.880
That energy from the audience makes everything a lot easier

700
01:03:22.880 --> 01:03:32.599
as well, because ultimately most audiences want you to do well.

701
01:03:33.840 --> 01:03:39.280
They've not come out with negativity. They're coming out because

702
01:03:39.320 --> 01:03:42.000
they want to have fun. They want to enjoy themselves,

703
01:03:42.599 --> 01:03:59.840
and they want to see you enjoy yourself. I mean,

704
01:03:59.880 --> 01:04:09.480
I've seen people do karaoke and sung so well that

705
01:04:09.639 --> 01:04:12.559
people in the audience are just it's in the pub,

706
01:04:12.679 --> 01:04:17.880
so no one has necessarily taken much notice. They all clap,

707
01:04:17.960 --> 01:04:21.559
but they're just like okay. And I've seen someone go

708
01:04:21.679 --> 01:04:27.800
on and didn't do didn't sing particularly great, but put

709
01:04:27.880 --> 01:04:35.039
effort in and the whole place goes up in cheers

710
01:04:36.920 --> 01:04:43.960
because they appreciate the fact that the person has made

711
01:04:43.960 --> 01:04:47.599
an effort. Or maybe it's a young kid that's gone

712
01:04:47.599 --> 01:04:56.000
on and everyone's cheering with the kid on and it's nice.

713
01:04:56.760 --> 01:04:58.840
I think that's why some of these talent shows like

714
01:04:58.920 --> 01:05:02.480
Britain's Got Talent are popular because I have people on

715
01:05:02.519 --> 01:05:08.199
their young people, elderly people, people have all played at

716
01:05:08.440 --> 01:05:15.239
or types performing some that maybe not want to say

717
01:05:15.280 --> 01:05:20.480
shouldn't perform, but maybe wouldn't get to perform otherwise. Yet

718
01:05:20.519 --> 01:05:26.719
they get an opportunity to be on stage and a

719
01:05:26.760 --> 01:05:31.920
good thing about stuffing like choir. Or when I was

720
01:05:31.960 --> 01:05:34.800
in a band, I wasn't particularly good at any of

721
01:05:34.840 --> 01:05:39.039
the music instruments that I played, but the rest of

722
01:05:39.039 --> 01:05:42.320
the band drowned me out. So even if I did

723
01:05:42.360 --> 01:05:50.400
above not or I just couldn't. Played a completely different tune,

724
01:05:50.960 --> 01:05:58.400
which happened once and it wasn't my fault. The tune

725
01:05:58.480 --> 01:06:01.840
was supposed to go do do do do do do

726
01:06:01.960 --> 01:06:04.639
do do do do do do do do do do

727
01:06:04.440 --> 01:06:07.320
Do Do Do Do Do Do Do do do do

728
01:06:07.320 --> 01:06:10.519
do do do do do do do do do do

729
01:06:10.719 --> 01:06:17.719
do do Now, this was on a Sunday morning. It

730
01:06:17.760 --> 01:06:23.199
was Trafalgar Day. There was cic cadets from every town.

731
01:06:23.360 --> 01:06:31.840
There probably the hundreds if not more ciccadetes all walk

732
01:06:31.920 --> 01:06:35.320
in the streets on Trafalgar Day, which is a really

733
01:06:35.320 --> 01:06:41.800
big like naval day. The night before or the evening before,

734
01:06:44.639 --> 01:06:46.639
I got a little bit distracted and I was thinking

735
01:06:46.639 --> 01:06:51.119
about the Duke's a hazard. So I was going do

736
01:06:51.119 --> 01:06:52.800
do do do do do do do do do do,

737
01:06:55.000 --> 01:06:57.119
but no one heard it. The person next to me

738
01:06:57.159 --> 01:07:04.719
heard it and started laughing, but it wasn't heard and

739
01:07:04.760 --> 01:07:12.039
no one cared because no one's really looking at me anyway. Okay,

740
01:07:12.079 --> 01:07:14.320
one person said, can you pull your trousers up please?

741
01:07:14.920 --> 01:07:30.280
But other than that, you know, so, what was I

742
01:07:30.360 --> 01:07:38.960
talking about? Oh? Yeah, So the bottom line really is

743
01:07:42.039 --> 01:07:44.039
to look forward to it because you want to do it,

744
01:07:45.199 --> 01:07:52.639
because you enjoy doing it, and because it's fun. And

745
01:07:54.719 --> 01:08:09.079
what other reason is there really which means anything other

746
01:08:09.159 --> 01:08:13.519
than feeling calm and relaxed. Yeah, a bit excited. You

747
01:08:13.559 --> 01:08:19.319
know this the adrenaline adrenalines there are standard when it

748
01:08:19.359 --> 01:08:25.279
comes tonight, but it's a different type of adrenaline. It's

749
01:08:25.399 --> 01:08:31.239
positive adrenaline. It's a there's no no negativity involved or attached.

750
01:08:31.960 --> 01:08:34.560
That's not there at all, because it's it doesn't fit.

751
01:08:35.840 --> 01:08:42.439
There's no room, there's no space for it. It's not relevant,

752
01:08:43.880 --> 01:08:49.960
it's not required. You can't you can't have you can't

753
01:08:50.000 --> 01:08:53.079
feel relaxed and stressed at the same time. The two

754
01:08:53.119 --> 01:08:57.760
don't really go together, not really, not when you've really relaxed,

755
01:09:08.000 --> 01:09:12.399
and a good thing is you can also feel focused

756
01:09:12.640 --> 01:09:15.760
and relaxed at the same time, which is good, a

757
01:09:15.880 --> 01:09:25.119
nice focused relaxation where you can do and enjoy doing

758
01:09:25.760 --> 01:09:34.039
what you want to do on stage, performing doing what

759
01:09:34.079 --> 01:09:37.359
you know you can do, what you've rehearsed, what you practiced,

760
01:09:39.479 --> 01:09:47.439
ultimately doing what you've chosen to do. And when you

761
01:09:47.560 --> 01:09:54.159
realize you've chosen to do it, what possible reason is

762
01:09:54.159 --> 01:10:00.199
there to feel anything about? Positive? Really? In reality, Tea,

763
01:10:01.039 --> 01:10:14.039
there isn't Is there? Comfort and calmness and a degree

764
01:10:14.079 --> 01:10:19.840
of excitement surely is pretty much all you can have

765
01:10:20.000 --> 01:10:34.079
now because you've chosen to do this. It's your choice.

766
01:10:35.159 --> 01:10:41.720
And if you're doing something you've chosen to do, what

767
01:10:42.279 --> 01:10:45.159
it can't be anything, especially in this situation like this,

768
01:10:46.680 --> 01:10:53.199
What can it be but calm? How can you feel

769
01:10:53.279 --> 01:11:03.840
but relaxed and positive? It's not like you're going to

770
01:11:03.880 --> 01:11:06.880
get on stage and someone's going to say, now, build

771
01:11:06.960 --> 01:11:11.000
me a space rocket. Yeah. I mean if someone did

772
01:11:11.000 --> 01:11:14.720
that to me, I'd be that that would be a

773
01:11:14.720 --> 01:11:18.359
bit distressing. Mind you, I am a rocket scientist, so

774
01:11:18.359 --> 01:11:20.880
it be okay for me. I'm not. I don't know

775
01:11:20.880 --> 01:11:23.319
why I said that. Why would someone ask you to

776
01:11:23.319 --> 01:11:25.920
build a space rocket? But it's not going to happen,

777
01:11:26.000 --> 01:11:30.880
is it? You? Know why you're there. You know why

778
01:11:30.920 --> 01:11:34.319
you're going there, and also you've got the support of

779
01:11:34.399 --> 01:11:38.399
the other people, and that does include the audience. They

780
01:11:38.479 --> 01:11:44.880
want to see you succeed, but they're not bothered. They're

781
01:11:44.920 --> 01:11:47.840
not examining you. They're not it's like, oh, watching every

782
01:11:47.880 --> 01:11:51.800
move you make. They're just there to have fun. They're

783
01:11:51.800 --> 01:11:56.640
more focused on their own in the feelings than what's

784
01:11:56.680 --> 01:12:04.479
going on in anyone else's mind. So I'll leave you

785
01:12:04.520 --> 01:12:08.760
with that. Let me know if it's useful or if

786
01:12:08.800 --> 01:12:11.079
it was just a punch of rubbish. I don't know

787
01:12:11.079 --> 01:12:15.920
who it might have been, so hopefully it was a

788
01:12:15.920 --> 01:12:19.239
little bit useful for you, So thank you for listening.

789
01:12:19.319 --> 01:12:21.920
Remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to

790
01:12:21.920 --> 01:12:26.319
be happy. Be gentle with yourself. You do deserve to

791
01:12:26.359 --> 01:12:32.680
feel safe and good luck with your performance, feeling relaxed

792
01:12:32.720 --> 01:12:38.239
and confident because you want to, because you choose to.

793
01:12:41.079 --> 01:12:44.840
Lots of love. Bye,