July 13, 2025

(music) (5 hours) Uncle Sausages Update | LMBYTS #1392 | Jason Newland | 13th July 2025

(music) (5 hours) Uncle Sausages Update | LMBYTS #1392 | Jason Newland | 13th July 2025
Apple Podcasts podcast player icon Spotify podcast player icon
Apple Podcasts podcast player icon Spotify podcast player icon
None
WEBVTT

1
00:00:01.040 --> 00:00:10.560
Hello, and welcome to jasonnew Land dot com. My name

2
00:00:10.759 --> 00:00:16.199
is Jason new Land and I am sitting in my

3
00:00:16.640 --> 00:00:27.760
chair with my favorite little doggie, Finney Finney. Oh he's

4
00:00:27.800 --> 00:00:39.920
colored up to me. I'm just stroking him. Oh yeah.

5
00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.840
Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

6
00:00:48.439 --> 00:00:55.000
I thought i'd do a Sunday subbery as it's Sunday,

7
00:00:56.759 --> 00:01:02.520
so like a summary of last week, not a summary

8
00:01:02.600 --> 00:01:08.000
of Sunday, because I haven't done much today except sleep really,

9
00:01:11.280 --> 00:01:15.200
although I did gap very very early this morning to

10
00:01:15.200 --> 00:01:21.079
watch the boxing. So here's a summary. Let's see where

11
00:01:21.079 --> 00:01:25.680
do we start. Should we start Monday or should we

12
00:01:25.719 --> 00:01:30.400
start yesday to Yeah, let's start Monday and work. I

13
00:01:30.480 --> 00:01:34.959
waited today, so I can't remember anything that happened on

14
00:01:35.120 --> 00:01:49.799
Sunday last week, so Monday. You know what this is? Weird? Okay?

15
00:01:50.840 --> 00:01:55.519
The days seem to be mixing together, or rather the

16
00:01:55.560 --> 00:02:02.840
weeks are mixing together, and I'm not one hundred percent

17
00:02:02.920 --> 00:02:07.439
sure what happened last week and what happened this week,

18
00:02:10.680 --> 00:02:14.120
so I might get it a little bit wrong, a

19
00:02:14.120 --> 00:02:23.919
little bit wrong. So today's Sunday. Something? Is it the

20
00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:34.479
twelfth of July? I think something like that and it's

21
00:02:34.520 --> 00:02:41.759
about three. It's twenty to three in the afternoon. I've

22
00:02:41.759 --> 00:02:46.280
got the windows open because it's quite it's a stuffy

23
00:02:46.360 --> 00:02:49.719
day to day. It's like it's warm, but it's stuffy.

24
00:02:50.319 --> 00:02:55.360
It's overcast. The sun's not there quite obviously it's there,

25
00:02:55.400 --> 00:03:01.840
but there's no sunshine really, but it's very stuffy, very

26
00:03:04.560 --> 00:03:08.159
like there's less oxygen and the normal, which is probably a

27
00:03:08.240 --> 00:03:14.800
weird thing to say. However, based on that, I'm wondering

28
00:03:14.840 --> 00:03:16.240
whether or not we're going to have a big old

29
00:03:16.439 --> 00:03:20.800
thunderstorm tonight. I hope so. And I like a big

30
00:03:20.840 --> 00:03:26.479
thunderstorm even then he doesn't care about them. Honestly, I

31
00:03:26.520 --> 00:03:28.840
know it's a bit selfish because I like something that

32
00:03:28.879 --> 00:03:32.639
a lot of people don't like, but I do. I

33
00:03:32.840 --> 00:03:45.240
love a thunderstorm, really really loud one. Yeah, So I

34
00:03:45.280 --> 00:03:47.719
think maybe it's I don't know, I don't know why,

35
00:03:47.759 --> 00:03:53.840
I just do. There's something, Ever, since I was a kid,

36
00:03:53.879 --> 00:03:58.879
I quite like the idea that nature is just way

37
00:03:58.919 --> 00:04:05.439
more powerful than anything humans can produce. As far as

38
00:04:08.560 --> 00:04:13.080
you know, just every now and then, it seems that

39
00:04:13.280 --> 00:04:16.800
nature just pops its little head up and says just

40
00:04:16.839 --> 00:04:20.639
a little reminder to the humans you know, I can

41
00:04:20.680 --> 00:04:24.120
do this in a second. Something that you can create,

42
00:04:24.920 --> 00:04:28.040
I can. You know, it's I don't know, just it's

43
00:04:28.160 --> 00:04:33.759
very powerful, isn't it? Nature? But naturally? But at the

44
00:04:33.800 --> 00:04:35.759
same time I don't as I don't like things that

45
00:04:35.920 --> 00:04:45.920
cause damage and harm. But I guess because we don't

46
00:04:45.920 --> 00:04:52.680
really get that much here, which is nice, but just

47
00:04:52.720 --> 00:05:02.560
a big thunderstorm more a particularly winded day. It's something

48
00:05:02.560 --> 00:05:06.720
to be respected, isn't it. Really? I would say nature.

49
00:05:11.079 --> 00:05:18.079
I was thinking about, you know, the old argument about

50
00:05:18.399 --> 00:05:27.360
what what instincts we're born with nature versus nurture. So

51
00:05:27.680 --> 00:05:31.240
what we talk compared to what do we learn, you know,

52
00:05:31.319 --> 00:05:38.240
compared to what natural instincts do we have? And dogs

53
00:05:38.240 --> 00:05:41.519
have been studied for this, dogs, rats, animals and stuff

54
00:05:41.639 --> 00:05:47.600
and humans of course, but the idea that a dog

55
00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:55.959
has that it made me rethink it because I was

56
00:05:56.000 --> 00:06:00.680
thought that dogs naturally, you know, a dog or pockets leg.

57
00:06:00.839 --> 00:06:03.079
A male dog would cock its leg to go for wuies.

58
00:06:04.639 --> 00:06:08.519
It will kick behind it after going to a toilet

59
00:06:08.920 --> 00:06:12.120
to cover up because you know, to keep away predators

60
00:06:12.160 --> 00:06:17.399
and stuff and not know why they're doing it, and

61
00:06:17.439 --> 00:06:23.839
it's instinctive. But with Vinnie, it's not instinctive because he

62
00:06:23.920 --> 00:06:28.759
had no brothers or sisters. When he was born. He

63
00:06:28.920 --> 00:06:35.800
was around no dogs, really, he had a female. He

64
00:06:35.879 --> 00:06:40.560
was around his mum. So when he went to a toilet,

65
00:06:40.639 --> 00:06:43.920
he crouched, which I guess is what his mum did.

66
00:06:46.720 --> 00:06:50.959
And I had him at ten months old, so he

67
00:06:51.079 --> 00:06:57.279
never cocked his leg and he never did the old like,

68
00:06:57.560 --> 00:07:01.079
you know, kicking back after going to a toilet, didn't

69
00:07:01.079 --> 00:07:05.360
do any of that stuff. Once he started going out

70
00:07:05.399 --> 00:07:12.079
for walks with Logi, my friend's dog downstairs, he started

71
00:07:12.079 --> 00:07:17.560
copying them. He started cocking his legs, started kicking. The

72
00:07:17.800 --> 00:07:21.600
weird thing about it is he'll go to toilet and

73
00:07:21.639 --> 00:07:23.800
then we'll turn around and we'll keep behind him, which

74
00:07:23.839 --> 00:07:29.839
is a complete different direction. So there's no point always

75
00:07:29.879 --> 00:07:39.480
doing it, but he's just learned it so that that. Yeah,

76
00:07:39.519 --> 00:07:42.480
he had about eleven months with Logi, No, not eleven

77
00:07:42.480 --> 00:07:45.560
mode more than that, didn't he because my friend left

78
00:07:45.560 --> 00:07:51.439
in November and I had Logi to for another three

79
00:07:51.480 --> 00:07:57.120
months to the end of February. I think I was

80
00:07:57.199 --> 00:08:00.800
in March, I think February, so he had over I

81
00:08:00.839 --> 00:08:05.720
mean there three months of living with him solidly upstairs here,

82
00:08:06.160 --> 00:08:13.480
him and Logi together, but before that they would see

83
00:08:13.480 --> 00:08:16.839
each other every day, go for walks every day, so

84
00:08:16.879 --> 00:08:21.240
we copied him. But after living it like it didn't

85
00:08:21.240 --> 00:08:26.519
actually get on so well because Vinnie was Vinnie wanted

86
00:08:26.639 --> 00:08:32.000
his He wanted his own space, and this was his home.

87
00:08:32.960 --> 00:08:36.759
He didn't want He liked Vinni, he liked Logi visiting.

88
00:08:41.360 --> 00:08:43.840
But there's certain times, like when he came to bedtime,

89
00:08:44.360 --> 00:08:47.039
Logi took up. He needed a whole bed because of

90
00:08:47.120 --> 00:08:50.879
a b old dog. Vinnie was trying to push Logi off.

91
00:08:51.120 --> 00:08:54.799
He couldn't physically do it. I couldn't physically do it.

92
00:08:54.799 --> 00:09:00.759
It was too strong and heavy, and Vinnie did not

93
00:09:00.960 --> 00:09:05.399
like that. That's when he started sleeping on a pillow

94
00:09:05.440 --> 00:09:09.159
next to me, because before that he always used to

95
00:09:09.200 --> 00:09:12.960
sleep at the bottom of the bed or maybe at

96
00:09:12.960 --> 00:09:17.000
the side, like cuddle up to me when I was asleep,

97
00:09:17.039 --> 00:09:18.759
because he didn't like to cuddle up to me when

98
00:09:18.759 --> 00:09:23.879
I was awake. Doesn't like to show it any kind

99
00:09:23.879 --> 00:09:32.960
of affection. Weird, weird old sausages. And so that's the

100
00:09:33.440 --> 00:09:36.399
pillow next to me. That was kind of the only

101
00:09:36.480 --> 00:09:39.720
space he had, or right behind him near the wall.

102
00:09:40.600 --> 00:09:45.679
Because Logi took up literally half the bed. Vinnie takes

103
00:09:45.759 --> 00:09:48.879
up half the bed, but he doesn't need half the bed.

104
00:09:49.639 --> 00:09:53.840
LOGI needed half the bed because he's big old thing.

105
00:09:56.399 --> 00:09:59.279
What's that guy do with the last week?

106
00:09:59.559 --> 00:10:00.360
I don't know.

107
00:10:01.799 --> 00:10:03.799
Who expect me to keep track of what I'm saying.

108
00:10:06.320 --> 00:10:10.919
Sorry about the noise, but it's like a crush in

109
00:10:10.960 --> 00:10:14.799
the garden. I can't do anything about it. I'm not

110
00:10:14.840 --> 00:10:24.600
closing the windows. And at the same time, I do

111
00:10:24.720 --> 00:10:29.080
also want to make recordings, so it's one of those

112
00:10:29.960 --> 00:10:38.879
either I don't make a recording. Isn't it really weird?

113
00:10:38.919 --> 00:10:42.320
You know when you've got an adult that's really loud,

114
00:10:43.519 --> 00:10:45.840
and you've got a kid with that adult all the time,

115
00:10:46.679 --> 00:10:51.200
and then the kid starts being really loud verbally. Then

116
00:10:51.240 --> 00:10:53.480
the adult gets upset with a kid for being loud.

117
00:10:55.840 --> 00:11:07.320
Now that is funny. That's our funny old situation. Bless them.

118
00:11:07.679 --> 00:11:11.639
A loud people raise loud people. It's just because we

119
00:11:11.840 --> 00:11:14.200
just learned. It's the whole nature and nurture what everything

120
00:11:14.279 --> 00:11:25.559
as well, isn't it. It's sometimes I feel lucky that

121
00:11:25.679 --> 00:11:27.879
I moved around so much when I was very young,

122
00:11:29.120 --> 00:11:31.679
that I wasn't with the same people. I wasn't with

123
00:11:31.720 --> 00:11:36.320
the same adults. And you know, it might seem weird

124
00:11:36.399 --> 00:11:43.759
because technically I probably lucky wasn't the right word. I

125
00:11:43.799 --> 00:11:48.519
didn't get caught up in that copying other people's behavior.

126
00:11:50.279 --> 00:11:54.919
So I didn't grow up like my dad, or like

127
00:11:54.960 --> 00:12:00.279
my mom or like my step mom. I didn't. I

128
00:12:00.279 --> 00:12:03.480
didn't grow up like them or like the nuns, although

129
00:12:03.480 --> 00:12:06.759
I do sometimes like to dress up and pace around

130
00:12:06.759 --> 00:12:09.519
with a big ruler, big bit of wood. But other

131
00:12:09.600 --> 00:12:18.320
than that, I'm not saying I wasn't influenced by them,

132
00:12:18.399 --> 00:12:21.240
because kids are influenced by what's around them, aren't they.

133
00:12:21.519 --> 00:12:24.279
I think all humans are really to be honest, I

134
00:12:24.320 --> 00:12:32.120
know I am to a degree, but I didn't end

135
00:12:32.200 --> 00:12:36.480
up being like a little carbon copy or even even

136
00:12:36.600 --> 00:12:42.879
partially a carbon copy of a parent. So I didn't

137
00:12:42.919 --> 00:12:47.919
have the especially if you think back to the era

138
00:12:48.039 --> 00:12:51.639
that I grew up, like the seventies, So I didn't

139
00:12:51.639 --> 00:12:58.840
grow up racist or homophobic, or particularly sexist or anything

140
00:12:58.879 --> 00:13:06.279
like that. I didn't have those strong views about people

141
00:13:06.279 --> 00:13:12.000
from other countries and stuff, because I've just been I've traveled,

142
00:13:12.159 --> 00:13:15.200
not traveled, but I've been around. You know, I was

143
00:13:15.240 --> 00:13:16.960
in this little town at the age of seven I

144
00:13:17.000 --> 00:13:21.639
was in this little town and I was hearing people

145
00:13:21.759 --> 00:13:31.759
be I don't know, not very friendly towards non white people,

146
00:13:32.080 --> 00:13:34.720
let's just say. And this was standard in the seventies,

147
00:13:36.840 --> 00:13:40.440
standard almost kind of just flippant in a flippant way,

148
00:13:40.720 --> 00:13:44.480
not necessarily in a bullian way, just about people that

149
00:13:44.559 --> 00:13:50.320
were non white. Now there was only I think I

150
00:13:50.440 --> 00:13:55.200
met one black person. There was one black person in

151
00:13:55.240 --> 00:14:01.039
my school, or he was a mixed race, and there

152
00:14:01.120 --> 00:14:05.799
was probably one black person in the town. The only

153
00:14:05.919 --> 00:14:07.960
Chinese people in the town were people that had a

154
00:14:08.039 --> 00:14:11.320
Chinese takeaway. The only Indian people the people that had

155
00:14:11.399 --> 00:14:14.279
Indian restaurants. It was that kind of town, you know,

156
00:14:14.440 --> 00:14:19.159
early eighties, late seventies, early eighties, very like ninety nine

157
00:14:19.200 --> 00:14:21.679
point nine point nine point nine point nine point nine

158
00:14:21.840 --> 00:14:28.480
nine percent Caucasian. So I go to that town and

159
00:14:28.559 --> 00:14:31.200
people are being all It wasn't just the people, but

160
00:14:31.279 --> 00:14:37.000
on television it was a very kind of prejudice. Being

161
00:14:37.039 --> 00:14:41.960
prejudiced was just okay. It was standard. It was on

162
00:14:45.840 --> 00:14:50.600
family entertainment. Was racist and homophobic. It was a standard thing.

163
00:14:54.559 --> 00:14:56.399
And I probably laughed, Yeah, I did laugh at it

164
00:14:56.440 --> 00:15:03.320
as well. I was a kid. I laughed. But the

165
00:15:03.360 --> 00:15:08.360
difference is I had been I knew I'd had black

166
00:15:08.399 --> 00:15:11.159
friends when I was in the kids home. In fact,

167
00:15:11.159 --> 00:15:16.080
my girlfriend was black. So I didn't have that attitude.

168
00:15:16.120 --> 00:15:19.039
I didn't have that kind of but a lot of

169
00:15:19.080 --> 00:15:22.840
people in the town had never actually seen someone that

170
00:15:22.960 --> 00:15:27.440
was non white in the flesh, which is weird to imagine,

171
00:15:27.440 --> 00:15:31.120
but it's probably true actually, other than on television or

172
00:15:31.120 --> 00:15:41.879
in movies. So I didn't have that. I don't know,

173
00:15:41.960 --> 00:15:45.360
I just didn't have that attitude, that kind of that

174
00:15:45.440 --> 00:15:51.679
little brain defect that I think people that grew up

175
00:15:51.720 --> 00:15:55.159
in that time had a little bit if they lived

176
00:15:55.159 --> 00:15:59.679
in a completely kind of little, tiny little town in

177
00:15:59.759 --> 00:16:03.039
the mid love nowhere where you know, and obviously if

178
00:16:03.080 --> 00:16:04.759
you're in London it's different, or if you're in a

179
00:16:05.080 --> 00:16:10.120
big city it's multicultural, and it has been for for

180
00:16:10.120 --> 00:16:21.159
a long long time, since probably the fifties. I was

181
00:16:21.159 --> 00:16:24.399
going to say something mildly intelligent then, but I've forgot

182
00:16:24.399 --> 00:16:33.320
what it was. Yeah, I don't know. I just I

183
00:16:33.360 --> 00:16:35.000
don't mean know what I'm trying to say here. Just

184
00:16:37.279 --> 00:16:40.399
I don't why thinking of nature and nurture because we're

185
00:16:40.440 --> 00:16:44.159
not born like that, are we? Was it the two

186
00:16:44.200 --> 00:16:49.200
things that babies are born with two fears, the fear

187
00:16:49.240 --> 00:16:53.159
of falling and loud noises. That seems to be the

188
00:16:53.200 --> 00:16:59.080
only two. I don't think that's true, though. Everyone's got

189
00:16:59.080 --> 00:17:04.559
their own thing, and that babies that might be left

190
00:17:04.599 --> 00:17:10.279
on their own do they sometimes. I was quite a

191
00:17:10.319 --> 00:17:16.799
good father figure. Once in nineteen ninety five, I was

192
00:17:16.920 --> 00:17:20.839
dating this lady. She was I think she was two

193
00:17:20.920 --> 00:17:23.160
years old than me. I was twenty five, she was

194
00:17:23.200 --> 00:17:28.200
twenty seven. She had two kids wanted to She had

195
00:17:28.200 --> 00:17:32.079
a daughter who was about, I don't know, four five,

196
00:17:32.640 --> 00:17:34.400
and she had a son who was probably about a

197
00:17:34.519 --> 00:17:41.960
year old, basically a baby still. And that little boy

198
00:17:42.160 --> 00:17:49.000
bonded with me, like really bonded, like just automatically, I

199
00:17:49.119 --> 00:17:53.480
don't know why. And I used to be able to

200
00:17:53.480 --> 00:17:56.559
send him to sleep, so when he cried, he put

201
00:17:56.599 --> 00:18:02.319
his arms out for me to pick him up. Is

202
00:18:02.559 --> 00:18:08.200
like he connected with me. And I used to sing

203
00:18:08.240 --> 00:18:11.000
to him and I'd sing Michael Jackson songs and he'd

204
00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:16.960
fall asleep. And one time I went away, I was

205
00:18:17.000 --> 00:18:23.200
in Buttling's and I got a phone call from her dad,

206
00:18:23.400 --> 00:18:26.559
my girlfriend's dad, saying that the little boy, the little baby,

207
00:18:26.640 --> 00:18:29.119
was in hospital because he had an asthma attack. So

208
00:18:29.160 --> 00:18:34.400
I come back to London and I get in there.

209
00:18:34.400 --> 00:18:36.519
So I go into the Baby Ward, which is just

210
00:18:36.559 --> 00:18:39.079
a weird place to be, and the first thing the

211
00:18:39.079 --> 00:18:42.880
little boy does is put his arms out for me

212
00:18:42.920 --> 00:18:47.279
to pick him up, smiling, so happy to see me,

213
00:18:48.319 --> 00:18:52.559
and it was weird, Like, Wow, imagine if other human

214
00:18:52.599 --> 00:18:56.559
beings were happy to see me. Imagine having that kind

215
00:18:56.599 --> 00:19:08.839
of welcome from everyone that you meet in life. Life,

216
00:19:09.119 --> 00:19:16.480
you would just be almost blissful, wouldn't it. It'd be weird.

217
00:19:18.920 --> 00:19:26.079
Yeah's definitely weird, especially if you. Yeah, that would be weird,

218
00:19:26.119 --> 00:19:28.640
wouldn't it. Imagine you were robbing someone's house and they

219
00:19:28.680 --> 00:19:31.039
came in and caught you, and they were so excited

220
00:19:31.039 --> 00:19:33.960
to see you. Oh how are you? That'd be weird.

221
00:19:34.200 --> 00:19:39.279
Not that I rob people's houses, although funny enough. The

222
00:19:39.720 --> 00:19:43.720
lady downstairs who've got her flat robbed about three months ago.

223
00:19:44.440 --> 00:19:46.799
She found out who did it as a local neighbor,

224
00:19:47.680 --> 00:19:52.839
according to her.

225
00:19:52.039 --> 00:19:52.440
And.

226
00:19:53.960 --> 00:20:00.160
Apparently that same neighbor. Again, I don't have proof of this,

227
00:20:00.359 --> 00:20:04.759
but actually the dots fitar together because she knew stuff

228
00:20:04.799 --> 00:20:07.920
that she wouldn't know otherwise. She you know that I've

229
00:20:07.960 --> 00:20:10.799
not said to her the same neighbor was going around

230
00:20:10.839 --> 00:20:17.640
to people saying that I was a convicted I've been

231
00:20:17.680 --> 00:20:27.359
to prison for something really bad. And so the neighbor

232
00:20:27.400 --> 00:20:30.079
downstairs went online. Apparently the website can go on to

233
00:20:30.160 --> 00:20:39.359
check this stuff out, and it's weird. It's that really.

234
00:20:39.359 --> 00:20:41.759
I didn't know what to do with that information because

235
00:20:41.799 --> 00:20:44.640
this is someone that I actually visited it. I visited

236
00:20:44.640 --> 00:20:47.880
this person in the hospital last week, not not This

237
00:20:47.960 --> 00:20:53.920
isn't Uncle Sausages. This is another neighbor. When if it

238
00:20:53.960 --> 00:20:56.440
was Uncle Sausages, I wouldn't be visiting them anymore if

239
00:20:56.480 --> 00:21:03.920
I thought he'd said something like that about me. Yeah,

240
00:21:04.119 --> 00:21:07.839
that was weird. I said, like, okay, well if that

241
00:21:08.079 --> 00:21:10.920
was true, then I would not be living opposite a

242
00:21:11.000 --> 00:21:15.759
school for a fact. You know, there's a certain laws

243
00:21:15.799 --> 00:21:19.799
about stuff like that. But then it kind of like

244
00:21:19.839 --> 00:21:23.000
we had this conversation with me and the neighbor downstairs,

245
00:21:23.039 --> 00:21:26.119
and she said, yeah, but if you's going around telling people,

246
00:21:26.960 --> 00:21:30.880
you could end up really in a bad place. But

247
00:21:31.039 --> 00:21:39.079
you know, I said yeah, And it kind of explains

248
00:21:39.119 --> 00:21:41.119
why some people are used to sayloh to me, do

249
00:21:41.400 --> 00:21:47.400
now don't because it's the old saying, isn't it like

250
00:21:47.440 --> 00:21:54.200
the old no smoke about fire, that idiotic phrase. So, yeah,

251
00:21:54.200 --> 00:21:58.480
it's weird. I still trying to process this. It's not

252
00:21:58.519 --> 00:22:00.720
the best time to be trying to process any other

253
00:22:00.839 --> 00:22:07.880
serious stuff with what's going on with Uncle Sausages. I

254
00:22:07.920 --> 00:22:11.400
did not know what to do with that information. Also

255
00:22:11.480 --> 00:22:17.240
to find out that apparently the neighbor downstairs knows the

256
00:22:17.279 --> 00:22:22.200
person that broke into a flat. She's like a friend

257
00:22:22.240 --> 00:22:26.799
of a friend, and he didn't notice her flat. So

258
00:22:27.119 --> 00:22:30.799
he's gone and told her who organized it, which was

259
00:22:30.839 --> 00:22:34.720
the other neighbor. So I don't know if she's going

260
00:22:34.799 --> 00:22:38.119
to go to the police. I've got no idea. I can't.

261
00:22:38.519 --> 00:22:40.519
It's not for me to get involved in that stuff.

262
00:22:42.079 --> 00:22:44.279
And also it's not for me to know what's what

263
00:22:44.400 --> 00:22:46.279
is it. I don't know what's true and what's not true.

264
00:22:49.640 --> 00:22:56.880
But has absolutely blown my mind just thinking I'm walking

265
00:22:56.880 --> 00:23:06.599
around and people are thinking that of me. It's just absolutely, Yeah,

266
00:23:06.680 --> 00:23:11.359
it's weird. I should move on. I just it's all

267
00:23:11.359 --> 00:23:18.480
I've been thinking about since Friday. Yeah, Friday, that's when

268
00:23:18.519 --> 00:23:29.640
I Yeah, Friday, no Saturday, Saturday night, no Friday, Friday. Yeah,

269
00:23:30.440 --> 00:23:37.839
So since Friday afternoon, about five thirty, I remember roughly

270
00:23:38.680 --> 00:23:44.920
because uncle, well actually it was Auntie Landlord came around

271
00:23:45.000 --> 00:23:48.240
and got me to sign that form, that legal document

272
00:23:49.079 --> 00:23:52.640
that Auntie the uncle Sausages wanted me to sign. So

273
00:23:52.720 --> 00:24:01.319
I did that, and then what's her name called me

274
00:24:01.440 --> 00:24:06.440
up asked me for something. I said, a couple of

275
00:24:06.440 --> 00:24:09.000
black bags or some thing. As I went down and

276
00:24:09.039 --> 00:24:13.839
she started telling me all this stuff. Why why don't

277
00:24:13.839 --> 00:24:17.799
you know? I was like wow, because I said to

278
00:24:17.799 --> 00:24:20.400
her she was saying this stuff. I said, well, I

279
00:24:20.440 --> 00:24:21.880
don't know. I get on quite well with her, and

280
00:24:21.920 --> 00:24:23.880
she said, oh, you should hear what she said about you.

281
00:24:25.599 --> 00:24:28.759
And then when she was telling me, actually was things

282
00:24:28.799 --> 00:24:34.160
that she wouldn't know that makes sense, things that I've

283
00:24:34.319 --> 00:24:38.960
not because I've had hardly any conversations with the neighbor downstairs,

284
00:24:40.039 --> 00:24:44.680
hardly any conversations at all since she moved in. Helped

285
00:24:44.680 --> 00:24:47.319
her out a few times, actually, but we never really

286
00:24:47.359 --> 00:24:51.559
had any sit down, proper normal conversations. And it was

287
00:24:51.559 --> 00:24:54.400
the first time that we sat and talked for like

288
00:24:54.480 --> 00:25:00.359
half an hour, hadn't hadn't done that before, And she

289
00:25:00.440 --> 00:25:04.480
knew things that she wouldn't know unless she'd actually spoken

290
00:25:04.519 --> 00:25:09.160
to the other person. There's no way she'd know that stuff.

291
00:25:13.000 --> 00:25:22.759
It's very unusual, very unusual situation. I'm thinking that with

292
00:25:22.920 --> 00:25:28.440
people like that about here, I was like, I need

293
00:25:28.440 --> 00:25:34.319
to get out of here. I said to her, why

294
00:25:34.359 --> 00:25:36.680
didn't you tell me when? When she when you found out?

295
00:25:37.319 --> 00:25:40.559
When she said it, she said, I was going to,

296
00:25:40.680 --> 00:25:44.079
but you just let me know that you had bipolar,

297
00:25:44.480 --> 00:25:47.160
and I didn't want to. I was worried what your

298
00:25:47.160 --> 00:25:52.200
reaction would be. I said, I still got bipolar. You know,

299
00:25:52.880 --> 00:26:00.920
it wasn't just the weekend thing still here. I mean

300
00:26:01.000 --> 00:26:06.640
generally my reactions were internal most of the time, not always,

301
00:26:06.680 --> 00:26:11.160
but most of the time. And you know, it's kind

302
00:26:11.200 --> 00:26:14.720
of limited, limited to what I can do in these situations.

303
00:26:18.119 --> 00:26:24.319
But yeah, so that that's probably one of the biggest

304
00:26:24.359 --> 00:26:28.720
things that's happened this week for me, is hearing that

305
00:26:31.720 --> 00:26:34.000
how much of it is gossip, how much of it

306
00:26:34.039 --> 00:26:36.839
is true, how much of it But a lot of

307
00:26:36.880 --> 00:26:40.960
it was based on stuff that my neighbor would not know.

308
00:26:41.880 --> 00:26:43.880
She wouldn't know. There's no way in the world she

309
00:26:43.920 --> 00:26:48.519
could know. Should I say it one more time, she

310
00:26:48.720 --> 00:26:55.200
couldn't have known, which because I've not talked to anyone else.

311
00:26:56.680 --> 00:26:59.759
I don't talk to anyone anymore because my friend Luke's gone,

312
00:26:59.799 --> 00:27:04.839
so don't have conversations with people about what's going on locally.

313
00:27:05.480 --> 00:27:08.519
We used to chat about stuff. I suppose we'll have

314
00:27:08.519 --> 00:27:11.640
a little bit of a gossip, but generally, you know,

315
00:27:11.720 --> 00:27:17.000
since then, I don't have contact with pretty much anyone

316
00:27:17.960 --> 00:27:21.039
at all around here, apart from people I bump into

317
00:27:21.079 --> 00:27:28.720
when I'm walking over any Yeah, don't have anyone knock

318
00:27:28.759 --> 00:27:33.480
on the door or ring me. But there's this one

319
00:27:33.519 --> 00:27:40.160
person that I see that I don't see it very often,

320
00:27:40.160 --> 00:27:42.240
but i'd usually see a couple of times a week actually,

321
00:27:43.720 --> 00:27:45.960
And as I said, I visited her in hospital when

322
00:27:46.000 --> 00:27:51.240
she was lying there on oxygen. I mean you could argue, well,

323
00:27:51.279 --> 00:27:54.200
I was already I was at hospital anyway, so fair enough.

324
00:27:55.200 --> 00:27:57.880
But it's still, you know, it's a nice little bit

325
00:27:57.920 --> 00:28:02.720
of effort. I was going to give her a lift

326
00:28:02.759 --> 00:28:05.279
home as well, but she didn't get kicked out in time.

327
00:28:06.440 --> 00:28:14.559
She didn't get a parole. But the idea that someone's

328
00:28:16.160 --> 00:28:18.839
it's not even that they're going around if telling lots

329
00:28:18.880 --> 00:28:24.240
of people, you just say it to one person, that's

330
00:28:24.400 --> 00:28:31.279
enough to completely destroy everything for me. I suppose I'm

331
00:28:31.319 --> 00:28:36.480
lucky that the person she told didn't believe her, but

332
00:28:36.480 --> 00:28:39.119
at the same time still checked because it can be checked.

333
00:28:40.160 --> 00:28:45.480
You could check. There's a the whole website devoted to

334
00:28:45.559 --> 00:28:50.839
this subject. I've never even had I know, I don't drive,

335
00:28:50.960 --> 00:28:53.920
but I've never been arrested, never had a parking fine,

336
00:28:54.640 --> 00:28:58.279
never even had what do you call it a warning?

337
00:28:58.559 --> 00:29:02.960
Is it a warning about anything? I've never put in

338
00:29:03.000 --> 00:29:06.400
trouble for putting a cigarette out on the pavement. I've

339
00:29:06.640 --> 00:29:16.559
you know, it's literally nothing. My whole entire life. Saying that.

340
00:29:17.359 --> 00:29:19.079
When I was seven, I did get in trouble with

341
00:29:19.079 --> 00:29:23.720
the police, but that was because of stealing from the school.

342
00:29:23.920 --> 00:29:26.480
But the police didn't do anything to me. They just

343
00:29:26.559 --> 00:29:31.079
made me stand up and be humiliated. That's when I

344
00:29:31.160 --> 00:29:39.519
was Yeah, i was seven. But other than that, I've yeah,

345
00:29:39.559 --> 00:29:45.359
I've never had any nothing. I've got a very clean record.

346
00:29:47.319 --> 00:29:54.359
And without getting into obvious statements, I could not have

347
00:29:54.440 --> 00:30:01.920
been a counselor a therapeutic counselor counseling children adults for

348
00:30:02.440 --> 00:30:09.240
charities such as mind if I had, or, to be fair,

349
00:30:09.359 --> 00:30:13.160
possibly any criminal record. I mean, they can kind of

350
00:30:13.319 --> 00:30:15.799
override some of it, you know. If I had a

351
00:30:15.799 --> 00:30:24.240
criminal record for I'm trying to think something completely unrelated

352
00:30:24.240 --> 00:30:30.839
to human beings thirty years ago, you know, something like that.

353
00:30:30.880 --> 00:30:33.319
Maybe they can kind of override it and say, well,

354
00:30:34.359 --> 00:30:39.839
fair enough, it's a long time ago, it's not I'm

355
00:30:39.839 --> 00:30:44.160
trying to think of a scenario robin a bank. Maybe, No,

356
00:30:44.240 --> 00:30:45.240
it's probably not a good one.

357
00:30:45.319 --> 00:30:45.640
Is it.

358
00:30:50.319 --> 00:30:57.480
Stealing a tractor to carry home some pebbles from the

359
00:30:57.519 --> 00:31:01.920
beach for my petty. I'm just thinking something like that.

360
00:31:02.160 --> 00:31:06.079
It's like I stole attract I didn't, I'm saying, but like, okay,

361
00:31:06.160 --> 00:31:13.599
stole attractor is taking pebbles from a beach, stealing. Technically

362
00:31:13.640 --> 00:31:18.720
they're not owned by anyone, I guess. But then you know,

363
00:31:18.920 --> 00:31:22.920
steal detractor. It's not good. It's against the law. Get

364
00:31:22.960 --> 00:31:28.759
in trouble for that, get arrested, have a fine. The

365
00:31:28.799 --> 00:31:31.240
worst is going to be a suspended sentence, I imagine.

366
00:31:34.359 --> 00:31:37.200
But what I did notice, I've got got a friend

367
00:31:37.200 --> 00:31:43.839
who anyway, I won't go into that. Yeah, so that's very,

368
00:31:44.240 --> 00:31:48.519
very unusual. I can't live in the mode of like

369
00:31:48.599 --> 00:31:52.000
wanting to just get out of here now, move away.

370
00:31:52.720 --> 00:31:58.400
But I can't. There's no nowhere to go. But at

371
00:31:58.400 --> 00:32:03.279
the same time, I guess at least it's taken my

372
00:32:03.559 --> 00:32:09.680
attention off of Uncle's sausages for a few hours. They wow,

373
00:32:13.519 --> 00:32:15.640
he's phoning me up quite a lot when I'm not there.

374
00:32:16.720 --> 00:32:21.440
And because I gave him an iPad to watch his TV,

375
00:32:21.839 --> 00:32:27.200
you know, the sports channels, and he's struggling a little

376
00:32:27.240 --> 00:32:30.920
bit working a thing, and I said, I showed him

377
00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:34.799
how to do it, but I do understand that a

378
00:32:34.920 --> 00:32:38.240
new thing can take a while to learn, and he's

379
00:32:38.240 --> 00:32:43.720
getting confused with it, and maybe just play round of it,

380
00:32:43.920 --> 00:32:48.839
just practice, open up the different apps like that, you know,

381
00:32:49.279 --> 00:32:53.920
because it's not really any different from his TV. It's

382
00:32:54.000 --> 00:32:57.519
just instead of using a remote control, he's just touching

383
00:32:57.559 --> 00:33:04.279
the screen instead. But it's Yeah, he was saying something

384
00:33:04.319 --> 00:33:09.200
about the nurses. They're always walking off to go and pray,

385
00:33:10.440 --> 00:33:12.359
which is throwing him off a bit. And then he

386
00:33:12.519 --> 00:33:18.559
was talking about nurses on horseback and I thought an award.

387
00:33:19.920 --> 00:33:27.319
He said no, I said, well, what nurses on horses

388
00:33:27.920 --> 00:33:31.519
I don't really know what you're saying, so I'll try

389
00:33:31.519 --> 00:33:34.160
and find out what that was about. He said, they're

390
00:33:34.200 --> 00:33:40.680
on TV. I said, they're on TV. Okay, really was

391
00:33:40.720 --> 00:33:47.079
confused with that today. And then he talks about something,

392
00:33:47.079 --> 00:33:49.599
and then I'm not sure what he's talking about because

393
00:33:49.640 --> 00:33:56.000
I can't hear him very well because he's like, I

394
00:33:56.039 --> 00:33:58.960
think almost he's whispering to me because he doesn't want

395
00:33:59.000 --> 00:34:01.319
to other people to hear what is saying. Maybe or

396
00:34:01.799 --> 00:34:09.320
he doesn't want to disturb other people. I don't know.

397
00:34:11.920 --> 00:34:15.159
And I've noticed that he doesn't talk loudly anymore. He

398
00:34:15.239 --> 00:34:17.800
used to talk quiet. Not it wasn't loud, but he

399
00:34:17.920 --> 00:34:28.400
was very yeah, probably above normal normal volume level when

400
00:34:28.400 --> 00:34:32.000
he got animated and he was talking. He was never quiet.

401
00:34:32.760 --> 00:34:37.039
Now he's really quiet when he talks. I have to

402
00:34:37.079 --> 00:34:42.360
get my face really close to him. I mean literally,

403
00:34:43.159 --> 00:34:45.440
I have to get my ear inside his mouth in

404
00:34:45.519 --> 00:34:49.079
order for me to hear what he's saying, which is

405
00:34:49.119 --> 00:34:53.800
all weird visual. And it didn't used to be like that.

406
00:34:53.960 --> 00:34:56.039
I mean literally two weeks ago. He wasn't like that.

407
00:34:56.800 --> 00:35:00.639
Two weeks ago, he was with his neighbor, Del Boy,

408
00:35:01.360 --> 00:35:04.400
who is the bloke in a bed next to him.

409
00:35:04.880 --> 00:35:10.119
Uncle Sausages is walking around talking about football and stuff,

410
00:35:10.119 --> 00:35:15.079
and he was animated, and he was talking loudly and

411
00:35:16.239 --> 00:35:24.159
you know, enthusiastically, And now he's just sitting there. A

412
00:35:24.280 --> 00:35:28.760
Del Boy left, so he got out of the hospital,

413
00:35:33.159 --> 00:35:36.079
and it's just it kind of it feels a little

414
00:35:36.119 --> 00:35:40.599
bit like he's surrendered Uncle Sausages. He's just surrendered to

415
00:35:40.679 --> 00:35:45.760
the situation, which I understand is possibly part of the process.

416
00:35:49.760 --> 00:35:56.440
And he's he's having problems with his tummy, really quite

417
00:35:56.440 --> 00:35:59.920
bad problems with his tummy, which he didn't he was

418
00:36:00.039 --> 00:36:03.760
and experiencing before he went in there, although maybe it

419
00:36:03.880 --> 00:36:05.760
was a little bit, but it's you know, it's progressed.

420
00:36:07.199 --> 00:36:11.679
And he was saying, oh, I've got a tummy bug.

421
00:36:11.760 --> 00:36:15.800
I got I must have called it from from the hospital,

422
00:36:16.440 --> 00:36:22.199
which is possible, but no one else has got it.

423
00:36:23.400 --> 00:36:27.719
And well, it's kind of I think it's part of

424
00:36:28.119 --> 00:36:32.400
what he's going through and and also could be a

425
00:36:32.400 --> 00:36:39.039
reaction to the medication and stuff. I just wish I

426
00:36:39.039 --> 00:36:42.320
could just peek him up and take him out. You're

427
00:36:42.320 --> 00:36:46.719
not even allowed out of the hospital ward anymore, and

428
00:36:47.039 --> 00:36:50.679
he's in the discharge ward, so they're waiting for him

429
00:36:50.719 --> 00:36:57.519
to be I might just call this about Uncles Uncle

430
00:36:57.679 --> 00:37:02.800
Sausages update, because that way, if you don't want to

431
00:37:02.840 --> 00:37:06.880
hear about Uncle Sausages, you can just ignore this, because

432
00:37:07.760 --> 00:37:10.079
not everyone's going to want to listen to recordings that

433
00:37:10.119 --> 00:37:12.960
are like this, because you know, even though I'm not

434
00:37:13.000 --> 00:37:15.719
going to go into any kind of graphic detail or

435
00:37:15.719 --> 00:37:22.000
whatsoever it might, it's not necessarily something people are going

436
00:37:22.079 --> 00:37:26.559
to want to listen to. So I will just put

437
00:37:26.639 --> 00:37:31.719
down Uncle Sausages Update. That's fair, isn't it. Yeah, So

438
00:37:31.800 --> 00:37:37.280
if you get the Sunday Summary and let's record it

439
00:37:37.360 --> 00:37:42.920
Sunday Summary, Uncle Sausages Update. Ah, maybe I don't know,

440
00:37:43.079 --> 00:37:48.079
doesn't really matter, does anyone? Does anyone even bother worried

441
00:37:48.119 --> 00:37:52.920
about what the titles are of the recordings? Wait a minute,

442
00:37:53.079 --> 00:37:56.559
that's supposed to be Mondays, but are in objects? Does

443
00:37:56.559 --> 00:38:01.800
anyone care? I don't know. I just don't know. I

444
00:38:01.920 --> 00:38:10.239
don't know. It's weird. He was moaning about the food.

445
00:38:12.199 --> 00:38:22.639
He's still moaning about the food, and he's I think

446
00:38:22.639 --> 00:38:25.239
there's a little bit of a clash of cultures there

447
00:38:25.639 --> 00:38:30.280
because he's a you know, he's nearly eighty years old.

448
00:38:30.320 --> 00:38:35.159
He's got his religion. He hasn't really spent any time

449
00:38:35.199 --> 00:38:40.880
around people with an outwardly different religion to him, and

450
00:38:41.000 --> 00:38:43.679
you wouldn't even know what religion he was because he

451
00:38:43.679 --> 00:38:47.599
doesn't dress up or anything. So I think that's some

452
00:38:47.760 --> 00:38:51.639
kind it's a little bit of a little bit of

453
00:38:51.639 --> 00:38:56.440
a shock to his system to be around people that

454
00:38:56.559 --> 00:39:02.679
are dressed differently, and he's never been in hospital before,

455
00:39:04.880 --> 00:39:06.760
so it's kind of I think that it's a little

456
00:39:06.760 --> 00:39:11.159
bit of a culture shock being around people that are

457
00:39:11.199 --> 00:39:16.960
maybe speaking very different with a very different accent, and

458
00:39:17.039 --> 00:39:22.159
I think communication wise, he's struggling with that because I

459
00:39:22.199 --> 00:39:24.639
think they might struggle with him because he's got a

460
00:39:24.800 --> 00:39:32.559
very strong Irish accent, and some of his nurses and

461
00:39:32.639 --> 00:39:36.239
doctors have got a very strong accent from where they

462
00:39:36.239 --> 00:39:42.760
were born. So I think it's a little bit hard

463
00:39:42.840 --> 00:39:48.000
for both sides to understand what each other is saying.

464
00:39:49.599 --> 00:39:54.559
And because he can't understand, sometimes he's not asking for

465
00:39:54.639 --> 00:39:58.440
people to repeat. And I said to him, look if

466
00:39:58.519 --> 00:40:01.159
you don't if you don't know understand what someone's saying,

467
00:40:01.800 --> 00:40:05.079
maybe because they're not speaking loud enough. He's also I

468
00:40:05.119 --> 00:40:09.880
think he's a little bit he is hearing isn't as

469
00:40:09.920 --> 00:40:12.159
good as it used to be. He struggles to hear

470
00:40:12.199 --> 00:40:18.920
me on the phone, And how many people's hearing is

471
00:40:18.960 --> 00:40:22.599
as good as it used to be when they're seventy eight, realistically,

472
00:40:22.639 --> 00:40:27.400
you know, So I'm not saying anything prerogative. I'm not

473
00:40:27.400 --> 00:40:32.920
saying anything peroxide about him. So I said, look, I've

474
00:40:32.920 --> 00:40:38.119
got sausages. Just you can't ask people to repeat themselves,

475
00:40:38.599 --> 00:40:40.920
or you can even say I don't understand what you're saying.

476
00:40:41.880 --> 00:40:44.280
As long as you don't, you know, don't say it

477
00:40:44.280 --> 00:40:47.960
in a horrible way, but I don't understand what you're saying.

478
00:40:50.079 --> 00:40:55.320
And hopefully if that person has any communication skills, they

479
00:40:55.360 --> 00:40:59.920
will speak a little bit clearer and a little bit slower,

480
00:41:00.519 --> 00:41:03.480
and maybe a little bit louder, maybe or get closer

481
00:41:03.480 --> 00:41:06.840
to the person. It just seems like the obvious thing

482
00:41:08.079 --> 00:41:13.719
to do, although I've seen this so many times over

483
00:41:13.760 --> 00:41:19.000
the years, people with the same accent, like a really

484
00:41:19.039 --> 00:41:24.400
strong accent, not being able to understand each other. I've

485
00:41:24.440 --> 00:41:29.199
seen people from Glasgow, Liverpool, Newcastle talking to each other

486
00:41:29.719 --> 00:41:32.400
and they're talking so fast, and the other person says,

487
00:41:32.639 --> 00:41:40.679
huh what Now the person repeats exactly the same sentence

488
00:41:40.679 --> 00:41:44.400
as they did before, in exactly the same way, at

489
00:41:44.440 --> 00:41:48.840
exactly the same speed, with the exact same amount of mumbling,

490
00:41:50.920 --> 00:41:55.239
and then a person ah, and then they can kind

491
00:41:55.239 --> 00:41:57.960
of put it together after hearing it two or three times.

492
00:42:01.800 --> 00:42:06.760
I've noticed that for thirty forty years that people have

493
00:42:06.840 --> 00:42:09.719
the tends I say people with Some people have a

494
00:42:09.760 --> 00:42:14.639
tendency of they just repeat themselves exactly how they did before.

495
00:42:15.480 --> 00:42:18.599
But the fact that the person listening to them didn't

496
00:42:18.719 --> 00:42:23.800
understand what they said or didn't catch the full sentence

497
00:42:26.800 --> 00:42:31.360
means maybe you know, as I said, like speaking a

498
00:42:31.400 --> 00:42:36.400
little bit clearer. But I noticed that when people, For example,

499
00:42:36.559 --> 00:42:38.679
someone says I had a friend who used to sort

500
00:42:38.719 --> 00:42:44.199
of talk, and then he'd almost it's like his sentence

501
00:42:44.239 --> 00:42:47.960
would fall asleep at the end. So yeah, I'm going

502
00:42:47.960 --> 00:42:53.239
to head down to the what I'm now just going

503
00:42:53.320 --> 00:43:00.159
to head down to the world and it just drop off.

504
00:43:00.239 --> 00:43:02.280
Is like the last bit, the last word or the

505
00:43:02.360 --> 00:43:12.039
last two words were almost like fall asleep. Now, if

506
00:43:12.039 --> 00:43:15.360
someone asks me to repeat myself, because I'm perfect, of

507
00:43:15.360 --> 00:43:22.360
course I would think, oh, they didn't understand what I said,

508
00:43:22.679 --> 00:43:25.920
So maybe I'm mumbled, and I mumble everyone. I'm imagine

509
00:43:25.960 --> 00:43:30.480
everyone mumbled. Sometimes I love mumbling. It makes me makes

510
00:43:30.480 --> 00:43:31.079
me horny.

511
00:43:31.519 --> 00:43:33.039
So it.

512
00:43:34.760 --> 00:43:42.079
That was a really weird thing to say, and the

513
00:43:44.199 --> 00:43:53.960
has thrown me off. I thrown myself off. Wow, thrown

514
00:43:54.039 --> 00:43:55.519
myself off? That sounds weird as well.

515
00:43:55.599 --> 00:43:56.280
Isn't it.

516
00:43:56.360 --> 00:44:02.199
Stop throwing yourself off. There's people, we've got company. You're

517
00:44:02.280 --> 00:44:10.199
ruining the Christmas dinner. Well yeah, anyway, I just I

518
00:44:10.239 --> 00:44:11.840
don't even know why I'm talking about that while I'm

519
00:44:11.880 --> 00:44:16.440
talking about people mumbling, oh yeah, the nurses or the doctors.

520
00:44:17.239 --> 00:44:21.679
So in his last ward, so he'd been in one.

521
00:44:21.880 --> 00:44:25.119
This is fourth ward he's been in. The first one

522
00:44:25.280 --> 00:44:29.039
was in the accident emergency department, so it was in

523
00:44:29.119 --> 00:44:33.880
the ward there while he was being scanned and blood

524
00:44:33.960 --> 00:44:37.119
tests and all that stuff. So it was an award.

525
00:44:37.199 --> 00:44:41.880
But he then got moved after two days or it was.

526
00:44:41.880 --> 00:44:44.559
He had a Friday night, got moved on a Saturday

527
00:44:45.639 --> 00:44:52.800
to a new ward, to another ward. But he was

528
00:44:52.840 --> 00:44:57.800
only in there for about two days, maybe three days,

529
00:44:57.840 --> 00:45:01.320
two or three days, and then he got moved to

530
00:45:02.000 --> 00:45:04.519
the ward he was in before he moved to this

531
00:45:04.599 --> 00:45:09.239
new one to start with. He liked it in there.

532
00:45:09.800 --> 00:45:12.159
I wouldn't say liked. I mean he didn't. He didn't

533
00:45:12.159 --> 00:45:17.760
wake up every morning singing, you know, he didn't. He

534
00:45:17.840 --> 00:45:25.800
doesn't like it, but he liked the other patients. Dell

535
00:45:25.920 --> 00:45:29.039
Boy lived next to him. I think some other bloke

536
00:45:29.239 --> 00:45:34.159
that Big Paul or every Cardon was opposite, and then

537
00:45:34.159 --> 00:45:36.360
there was another bloke that was the other side opposite,

538
00:45:36.440 --> 00:45:40.360
but he he was asleep most of the time, but

539
00:45:40.519 --> 00:45:43.159
his wife used to come and chat to us. She

540
00:45:43.280 --> 00:45:52.320
was in here every single day. And excuse him, Alise

541
00:45:52.400 --> 00:46:05.639
going downside when the squeaky voice put off? What was

542
00:46:05.679 --> 00:46:11.679
I was gonna say? Yeah, when del Boy moved out,

543
00:46:17.159 --> 00:46:22.159
he had a new person move in and he didn't

544
00:46:22.239 --> 00:46:27.400
like him. Uncle Sausages took a dislike to this person.

545
00:46:27.800 --> 00:46:30.039
He thought that they were talking about him and stuff,

546
00:46:31.719 --> 00:46:35.719
and he thought that he was getting a preferential treatment.

547
00:46:37.599 --> 00:46:41.800
But the ward nurse because I called the ward nurse

548
00:46:42.880 --> 00:46:45.320
when Uncle Sausages told me this, and we got together

549
00:46:45.400 --> 00:46:49.960
and had a conversation. Has She explained that everybody's got

550
00:46:49.960 --> 00:46:53.559
different needs because they were all in the same ward

551
00:46:53.960 --> 00:46:59.840
for the same reason, but variations of that reason and

552
00:47:02.239 --> 00:47:08.400
at various stages of the condition as well. So this

553
00:47:08.400 --> 00:47:15.800
person had more personal needs than Uncle Sausages has. And

554
00:47:16.039 --> 00:47:19.039
Uncle Sausages was saying, Oh, I think he's private because

555
00:47:19.039 --> 00:47:21.679
he keeps clicking his fingers, which I'm sure he didn't,

556
00:47:21.719 --> 00:47:25.519
but kept asking for help with stuff, and that was annoying.

557
00:47:25.960 --> 00:47:29.679
Uncle Sausages and I tried to explain that if he

558
00:47:29.800 --> 00:47:33.360
was private, he wouldn't be in a ward with other people.

559
00:47:34.280 --> 00:47:38.639
You know that he his own places, in his own room,

560
00:47:38.840 --> 00:47:43.360
He definitely wouldn't be in that ward with everyone. But

561
00:47:45.639 --> 00:47:49.039
I think I think it's kind of just being stuck

562
00:47:49.079 --> 00:47:54.800
in one place. It was really just winding them up.

563
00:47:55.599 --> 00:47:57.360
And then he started thinking that they were saying that

564
00:47:57.400 --> 00:48:00.039
he was yeah, I want to say the word, but

565
00:48:00.480 --> 00:48:02.719
that they were kind of talking about him as if

566
00:48:02.719 --> 00:48:11.639
he was a criminal, some kind of you know, because

567
00:48:11.639 --> 00:48:16.760
of his name or his accent or whatever. And he

568
00:48:16.880 --> 00:48:21.960
started saying, don't you call me paranoid, because because he

569
00:48:22.039 --> 00:48:27.360
sort of said, maybe you're just you know, it might

570
00:48:27.440 --> 00:48:32.719
just be bored. It's almost like he was trying to

571
00:48:32.760 --> 00:48:38.239
create some drama but not meaning to. But then there's

572
00:48:38.280 --> 00:48:43.679
also confusion based on the condition, the medication. Just being

573
00:48:43.719 --> 00:48:48.920
in that environment. I feel confused now, just back and

574
00:48:48.960 --> 00:48:53.119
forward there when I'm in there, I just it is

575
00:48:54.719 --> 00:49:00.639
it's quite a confusing experience. So he must be yeah,

576
00:49:00.679 --> 00:49:10.840
all over the place. And then they moved him to

577
00:49:11.079 --> 00:49:15.800
this new ward and he was saying, oh, that bloke

578
00:49:15.920 --> 00:49:22.239
one he got uncle sausages kicked out and moved, which

579
00:49:22.280 --> 00:49:28.920
isn't true at all. It's basically he was moved to

580
00:49:28.960 --> 00:49:35.760
the discharge ward. I'm sure there's a few discharge wards

581
00:49:36.079 --> 00:49:38.840
in the hospitals, but he was moved to one of

582
00:49:38.880 --> 00:49:45.519
the discharge wards because he's being discharged, although it might

583
00:49:45.599 --> 00:49:53.000
take a while because he got asked by the hospice

584
00:49:54.320 --> 00:49:57.519
or a discharged nurse. But I think she's part of

585
00:49:57.559 --> 00:50:01.880
the hospice as well. And she said, he said, uncle, sausage,

586
00:50:01.920 --> 00:50:05.840
what have you? What have you decided? Because she she

587
00:50:05.880 --> 00:50:09.000
came a week before and she came in saying that

588
00:50:09.159 --> 00:50:12.280
you decided what you want to do yet? And he said, well,

589
00:50:12.280 --> 00:50:14.719
I don't want to go home. He didn't want to

590
00:50:14.760 --> 00:50:18.400
come back to the flat because of the mess and

591
00:50:18.480 --> 00:50:21.280
stuff like that there. She doesn't want to come back

592
00:50:21.320 --> 00:50:26.320
here what she did originally, And she said, or what

593
00:50:26.360 --> 00:50:29.559
do you want? He said, well, she said, do you

594
00:50:29.599 --> 00:50:34.440
want to go into a care home? She said, he said, no, hospice.

595
00:50:35.239 --> 00:50:37.400
That's what he told her, which I was a little

596
00:50:37.400 --> 00:50:41.000
bit surprised about because I've never I didn't think that

597
00:50:41.119 --> 00:50:44.360
was something that you could choose to do. I thought

598
00:50:44.400 --> 00:50:47.920
it was something that you I don't know, I just

599
00:50:49.000 --> 00:50:50.960
I thought it had gone for a care home, because

600
00:50:52.199 --> 00:50:54.639
I imagine that would be a much nicer environment and he'd

601
00:50:54.679 --> 00:51:02.639
make friends and stuff, and thinking about it as possibly

602
00:51:02.880 --> 00:51:06.719
where he should have been anyway, not not like a

603
00:51:06.800 --> 00:51:10.079
care home, but in a kind of a residential home

604
00:51:12.760 --> 00:51:15.239
where he was having his he was being looked after.

605
00:51:16.119 --> 00:51:19.119
He's got a few needs, just he'd have been looked after,

606
00:51:19.239 --> 00:51:21.239
and I think that's I think he'd have been much

607
00:51:21.280 --> 00:51:25.480
happier if he'd have had that for the last few years,

608
00:51:25.559 --> 00:51:30.440
just somewhere where he had his own room, ideally getting

609
00:51:30.440 --> 00:51:34.360
fed every day, he could watch you know, I have

610
00:51:34.559 --> 00:51:37.280
an own TV. He could watch sport all day long

611
00:51:37.320 --> 00:51:40.280
if he wanted. He'd also be able to have company,

612
00:51:40.800 --> 00:51:44.119
because he loves to talk to people. He's a people's person,

613
00:51:45.280 --> 00:51:51.199
and which is ironic because he's also solitary like me.

614
00:51:53.480 --> 00:51:55.480
And I think that's part of the reason why I've

615
00:51:55.519 --> 00:51:59.559
really tried to help him over the last year or so.

616
00:52:00.400 --> 00:52:02.280
I've always been there if he needed me since I've

617
00:52:02.280 --> 00:52:05.519
been there for ten years. But they kind of got

618
00:52:05.559 --> 00:52:07.800
a bit closer over the last year because of stuff

619
00:52:07.840 --> 00:52:11.480
with his flat and bills, and he couldn't he couldn't

620
00:52:11.480 --> 00:52:14.159
communicate on the phone anymore with people. So he helped

621
00:52:14.239 --> 00:52:20.079
got me to help him do it. And he loves chatting,

622
00:52:21.760 --> 00:52:27.760
loves people really, a bit like Finny loves humans. But

623
00:52:27.800 --> 00:52:31.679
he lives a solitary life what has done where he

624
00:52:31.719 --> 00:52:35.679
doesn't see anyone really unless he goes out to the

625
00:52:35.719 --> 00:52:38.760
petrol station or goes to the chip van. They all

626
00:52:38.800 --> 00:52:42.320
know him at the chip van because he chats to everyone.

627
00:52:42.480 --> 00:52:46.760
They feel like they know him because every you know,

628
00:52:46.800 --> 00:52:51.719
once a week he's there waiting for the chips, fish

629
00:52:51.800 --> 00:52:57.719
and chips and four cans of drink and a bad sausage.

630
00:52:58.519 --> 00:53:00.280
I even know what he gets now because got it

631
00:53:00.320 --> 00:53:07.840
fro him before. Mushy peas and curry source. I think.

632
00:53:09.199 --> 00:53:13.320
But they they really they love him in there. They're

633
00:53:13.360 --> 00:53:16.280
just because he talks then about because the thing is

634
00:53:16.400 --> 00:53:21.000
because they're I think they're I don't know what country

635
00:53:21.000 --> 00:53:29.280
they're from. Uncle Sausages does. And that's the thing. So

636
00:53:29.440 --> 00:53:32.079
Uncle Sosages hasn't he doesn't have a problem with people

637
00:53:32.119 --> 00:53:36.400
for being from other countries. It's just because his normal

638
00:53:36.440 --> 00:53:38.480
thing is. I've seen him do it with the security

639
00:53:38.480 --> 00:53:41.239
guards when we first went in to hospital. He was

640
00:53:41.280 --> 00:53:47.039
asking them where they were from. Specifically, so he could

641
00:53:47.079 --> 00:53:50.440
talk about sport. So if he saw someone who like,

642
00:53:50.480 --> 00:53:54.719
they're from India or from Pakistan or from that kind

643
00:53:54.719 --> 00:53:58.599
of part of the world, he'd go cricket. So where

644
00:53:58.719 --> 00:54:03.559
you're from, if they said old Bangladesh and it goes

645
00:54:03.599 --> 00:54:11.519
to cricket. If if he got someone that says, oh,

646
00:54:11.519 --> 00:54:16.440
they're from Cingali or they're from Jamaica or whatever, it'd

647
00:54:16.519 --> 00:54:21.239
talk about whatever, kind of probably football, you know, if

648
00:54:21.239 --> 00:54:25.760
someone is from Spain or Italy football, it kind of

649
00:54:25.800 --> 00:54:28.960
go with whatever is the national sport. But if someone

650
00:54:29.000 --> 00:54:35.199
was from Australia, he'd go cricket, do you know what

651
00:54:35.239 --> 00:54:38.280
I mean. So he's kind of that's he's interesting where

652
00:54:38.280 --> 00:54:41.800
people are from. But because people aren't talking to him,

653
00:54:41.840 --> 00:54:43.679
the nurses are not and the doctors are not there

654
00:54:44.159 --> 00:54:49.079
to talk about sport. They're there to, yeah, save people's

655
00:54:49.079 --> 00:54:53.000
lives and to do their rounds and they've got to

656
00:54:53.000 --> 00:54:59.000
get to the next person. So I think it's I

657
00:54:59.039 --> 00:55:01.480
guess since he feels like he's been silenced a bit,

658
00:55:02.360 --> 00:55:07.039
and I'm hoping that he gets out there as soon

659
00:55:07.079 --> 00:55:10.239
as possible. I hope it will be a care home

660
00:55:12.400 --> 00:55:18.920
because then he'll be around people and possibly he'll ever

661
00:55:19.440 --> 00:55:21.440
be able to have a nice chat with people and

662
00:55:21.599 --> 00:55:27.480
be able to just, I don't know, be himself again.

663
00:55:29.199 --> 00:55:30.679
But then I don't know how much of him not

664
00:55:30.679 --> 00:55:35.559
being himself is because of the see I'll tell you

665
00:55:35.599 --> 00:55:38.000
what it is breaking my heart. You know, this whole situation.

666
00:55:38.639 --> 00:55:40.880
I know it's supposed to perhaps I shouldn't call this

667
00:55:41.000 --> 00:55:44.119
to let me boy to sleep. It's hard. It's hard,

668
00:55:45.000 --> 00:55:48.599
but he doesn't seem to be himself anymore the way

669
00:55:48.639 --> 00:55:51.960
he used to. It goes in and out of it.

670
00:55:51.960 --> 00:55:58.880
It's not just personality wise. I mean, he's getting angry

671
00:55:58.920 --> 00:56:01.159
during the week, and I've never I've seen him angry before,

672
00:56:02.280 --> 00:56:05.400
but he's gone through a little periods of anger and

673
00:56:05.800 --> 00:56:09.599
telling me off, like okay, I would normally put up

674
00:56:09.599 --> 00:56:17.440
with that, Oh well yeah, it's sometimes I would be like,

675
00:56:18.039 --> 00:56:24.679
you know, go go yourself, like that's it. But I

676
00:56:24.719 --> 00:56:28.760
can't because that would be the wrong, wrong thing to do.

677
00:56:29.760 --> 00:56:33.800
So I'm kind of just trying to stick with it

678
00:56:33.880 --> 00:56:44.880
and hope that he gets released or gets discharged. It's

679
00:56:44.960 --> 00:56:48.199
quite funny, isn't it, Considering the nurses and care workers

680
00:56:48.239 --> 00:56:51.760
I have to deal with discharges all day long. He's

681
00:56:51.800 --> 00:56:58.639
in the discharge ward, which there are anyway, so he is.

682
00:57:00.559 --> 00:57:01.920
I don't know if he's going to be out of

683
00:57:01.920 --> 00:57:03.840
there by the end of the week, the end of

684
00:57:03.920 --> 00:57:07.480
next week, well it starts tomorrow, doesn't it really Monday?

685
00:57:08.519 --> 00:57:12.480
I don't know. But the nurse that he spoke to

686
00:57:12.679 --> 00:57:17.119
regarding getting discharged where he'd like to go, she's on it,

687
00:57:17.679 --> 00:57:23.519
and they've been on it for They started last Thursday,

688
00:57:23.639 --> 00:57:27.440
not this Thursday, got on the one before, so they've

689
00:57:27.440 --> 00:57:32.199
been on it for over a week already, trying to

690
00:57:32.239 --> 00:57:41.760
find him somewhere to move. And if he doesn't come

691
00:57:41.800 --> 00:57:48.280
back here. I didn't realize this, they literally will stop

692
00:57:48.320 --> 00:57:51.239
his money and give him twenty pounds a week to

693
00:57:51.280 --> 00:57:54.719
live on. Someone told me that. I don't know if

694
00:57:54.719 --> 00:57:59.480
it's true or not, and I realized that'll be getting

695
00:57:59.480 --> 00:58:04.039
all his meals and he'll be getting you know, he'll

696
00:58:04.119 --> 00:58:10.320
get somewhere to live in that, but he's twenty pounds

697
00:58:10.320 --> 00:58:18.960
a week. It's if you want some new clothes, what

698
00:58:19.000 --> 00:58:20.559
if he wants to buy you know what I mean,

699
00:58:20.719 --> 00:58:24.400
just he wants to because who know, if you don't know,

700
00:58:24.480 --> 00:58:31.119
they're giving him three an amount of time three and

701
00:58:35.719 --> 00:58:38.719
how long a give But he might you know, he

702
00:58:38.800 --> 00:58:41.880
may be around for a lot longer. Hopefully he is,

703
00:58:42.719 --> 00:58:46.199
so he might because I said to him, when you do,

704
00:58:46.320 --> 00:58:50.760
if you get a nice room in a care home,

705
00:58:52.840 --> 00:58:57.480
get yourself a big old TV. You know, just just

706
00:58:58.119 --> 00:59:00.280
I didn't say, I didn't say you must get awful

707
00:59:00.320 --> 00:59:03.679
to but get a nice TV. He's got a little

708
00:59:03.719 --> 00:59:06.599
one way he lives. I don't know why. It's not little,

709
00:59:06.599 --> 00:59:11.199
but it's kind of quite small, although he likes it.

710
00:59:11.280 --> 00:59:14.840
He likes to set up he's got before. But I said,

711
00:59:14.920 --> 00:59:20.280
just get a massive TV if you can. And what's

712
00:59:20.360 --> 00:59:24.199
weird is he's got a huge collection of magazines, sports

713
00:59:24.280 --> 00:59:33.119
magazines like football programs and things like that, cricket, rugby. Yeah.

714
00:59:33.280 --> 00:59:35.280
I said to him, what do you want to do

715
00:59:35.320 --> 00:59:37.039
with that stuff? And he said, just get rid of it.

716
00:59:42.679 --> 00:59:48.840
I mean, he had his whole flat cleared out just

717
00:59:48.840 --> 00:59:54.639
before Christmas because of I'd just say his collection is

718
00:59:54.719 --> 00:59:59.159
collecting and got out of hand. Okay, but he still

719
00:59:59.159 --> 01:00:02.559
managed to keep whold with thousands and thousands of magazines,

720
01:00:05.320 --> 01:00:13.599
like every drawer, every cupboard's full. And now he's willing

721
01:00:13.760 --> 01:00:20.239
to just like just chuck it away. And that just

722
01:00:20.320 --> 01:00:30.480
seems it just seems wrong. To do that. I mean, technically,

723
01:00:30.559 --> 01:00:32.519
I haven't got to do anything that council can come

724
01:00:32.519 --> 01:00:36.119
and do that, but i'd kind of like I'll speak

725
01:00:36.159 --> 01:00:38.039
to him and say, look, is there anything personal you

726
01:00:38.039 --> 01:00:40.559
want me to go through and get rid of or

727
01:00:41.719 --> 01:00:44.119
get for you to take into the home or put

728
01:00:44.119 --> 01:00:46.800
it into storage because he might have you know, he's

729
01:00:46.840 --> 01:00:48.960
got a big bible. I'm sure he doesn't want that

730
01:00:49.039 --> 01:00:52.760
chucked out, and he probably wants that to go to

731
01:00:52.840 --> 01:00:56.679
someone because honestly, it's like the size of the table massive.

732
01:00:57.360 --> 01:00:59.960
Someone gave it to him I think is uncle pay

733
01:01:00.039 --> 01:01:03.159
should go to him when he was a kid, so

734
01:01:04.079 --> 01:01:09.599
he's had that for forever. It's like big bound bible

735
01:01:10.360 --> 01:01:12.599
and it's like in a little booklet thing, so it's

736
01:01:12.760 --> 01:01:15.719
what big booklet thing. So it's very kind of kept

737
01:01:15.920 --> 01:01:22.400
kept well. And he might have personal stuff. He might

738
01:01:22.440 --> 01:01:27.320
have photographs, you know, family photographs, things like that. I

739
01:01:27.320 --> 01:01:30.280
don't know where they are, So I'm going to ask him,

740
01:01:30.480 --> 01:01:32.559
is this stuff in your flat that you want me

741
01:01:32.599 --> 01:01:36.800
to get for you? Photographs? Just I don't know any

742
01:01:37.440 --> 01:01:44.079
sentimental things because unless they allow him to come back

743
01:01:44.119 --> 01:01:51.639
to the flat to go through the stuff. But I

744
01:01:51.679 --> 01:01:53.519
imagine that'd be really hard for you. He said, he

745
01:01:53.519 --> 01:01:56.119
doesn't want to set foot in the place again. But

746
01:01:56.159 --> 01:01:59.199
I imagine that'd be hard, very hard for him to

747
01:01:59.239 --> 01:02:04.199
go back into that flat now after this, because he's

748
01:02:04.199 --> 01:02:10.760
lived there for thirty years, nearly twenty six years, ninety nine.

749
01:02:10.800 --> 01:02:17.679
I think he moved in there. So I don't know

750
01:02:18.000 --> 01:02:22.880
it's going to be. It just doesn't seem right that

751
01:02:23.400 --> 01:02:28.119
because I saw this with Luke. When Luke left, left me,

752
01:02:28.920 --> 01:02:34.199
left us, left the world. His flat was completely full

753
01:02:34.239 --> 01:02:42.880
of stuff. His family, immediate family came around because I

754
01:02:42.920 --> 01:02:44.880
had the key to his flat, I had a spare

755
01:02:44.960 --> 01:02:48.280
key up here, so I let.

756
01:02:48.079 --> 01:02:48.480
Them in.

757
01:02:50.159 --> 01:02:57.239
And they just took a few bits, like just like

758
01:02:57.440 --> 01:03:00.880
personal items like a T shirt still had his smell

759
01:03:00.920 --> 01:03:03.239
on and stuff like that, still like his sisters and

760
01:03:03.280 --> 01:03:07.239
his mum just keepsakes. And that was it. And then

761
01:03:07.239 --> 01:03:12.760
they tossed me the keyback, and he didn't want to go.

762
01:03:12.960 --> 01:03:15.199
They didn't want to set foot into that place again.

763
01:03:19.920 --> 01:03:22.920
And then I think a couple of week, yeah, then

764
01:03:22.960 --> 01:03:28.199
what happened is, no, I didn't take the key back.

765
01:03:28.320 --> 01:03:30.639
I said to a sister, keep the key. I don't

766
01:03:30.679 --> 01:03:34.559
want to I'm not going in there anymore. Either and

767
01:03:34.639 --> 01:03:36.239
I want to go in I didn't want to go

768
01:03:36.280 --> 01:03:42.559
in there. And so basically then another friend of his

769
01:03:43.079 --> 01:03:47.079
got ahold of the key, was given the key, and

770
01:03:47.119 --> 01:03:51.800
he went in there and started taking stuff out bit

771
01:03:51.880 --> 01:03:55.039
by bit, over like a week or two, got rid

772
01:03:55.079 --> 01:03:57.280
of as much as he could, anything that he could

773
01:03:57.280 --> 01:03:58.760
sell really to be honest.

774
01:04:00.280 --> 01:04:00.719
Or use.

775
01:04:04.000 --> 01:04:10.320
And then when the council came round to empty the place,

776
01:04:11.559 --> 01:04:15.719
this is something that I found very difficult actually, because

777
01:04:17.480 --> 01:04:25.920
they were very I only use the word unprofessional, but

778
01:04:26.239 --> 01:04:29.920
to be fair, what they're doing, they probably don't hire

779
01:04:30.199 --> 01:04:34.480
people with It's kind of perhaps they don't even think

780
01:04:34.920 --> 01:04:39.719
beyond what they're doing. They don't realize that actually when

781
01:04:39.719 --> 01:04:45.599
they're empty in someone's flat belongings, Okay, that person's not

782
01:04:45.679 --> 01:04:49.920
there anymore, but the other people around in the other flats,

783
01:04:50.559 --> 01:04:55.440
the neighbors may be very close to that person still

784
01:04:55.440 --> 01:05:00.679
be grieving. And the way they were treating his stuff,

785
01:05:02.159 --> 01:05:04.559
and we literally heard one and say what a bunch

786
01:05:04.599 --> 01:05:07.599
of junk as he was chucking it onto the back

787
01:05:07.639 --> 01:05:10.679
of a lorry and he was smashing this stuff up

788
01:05:10.800 --> 01:05:15.079
with a big hammer, a big mallet thing like outside

789
01:05:15.119 --> 01:05:21.679
the front, just to make more room and I just

790
01:05:21.880 --> 01:05:30.079
found that so disrespectful. But I don't think they did

791
01:05:30.159 --> 01:05:34.280
it with disrespect. I think they I think maybe they

792
01:05:34.440 --> 01:05:37.760
just to them it's just a job. They're clearing out

793
01:05:37.760 --> 01:05:42.559
a flat. They don't know what the situation is. A

794
01:05:42.599 --> 01:05:46.800
lot of people leave flats. They just move out, you know,

795
01:05:47.000 --> 01:05:50.639
it's and leave all their stuff in there, so that

796
01:05:50.960 --> 01:05:53.039
before they know it could be just someone that's just

797
01:05:53.079 --> 01:05:55.760
moved to a different town or just hadn't paid the

798
01:05:55.800 --> 01:05:59.239
rent for two years and skipped, you know, ran out,

799
01:06:00.440 --> 01:06:02.719
so they didn't they didn't know what the situation was.

800
01:06:07.239 --> 01:06:14.079
But still just I don't know, It's hard to explain it.

801
01:06:14.800 --> 01:06:17.760
I mean, I'm pretty sure if I'd have done that job,

802
01:06:20.159 --> 01:06:22.559
I might I might have said the same thing. I

803
01:06:22.639 --> 01:06:24.679
might have liked, Oh what a bunch of rubbish, what's

804
01:06:24.760 --> 01:06:29.599
all this stuff? I might have done, And maybe I

805
01:06:29.679 --> 01:06:31.840
might even do now, if you know. But maybe in

806
01:06:31.880 --> 01:06:34.320
the past, if I because I've had jobs where I've

807
01:06:34.320 --> 01:06:42.559
cleaned and stuff, so maybe I'd have had the same attitude.

808
01:06:43.199 --> 01:06:44.679
Perhaps I've become a bit more.

809
01:06:45.519 --> 01:06:46.320
I've always been.

810
01:06:46.239 --> 01:06:54.079
Quite sensitive, but I think I was more sensitive about

811
01:06:54.079 --> 01:06:59.840
myself towards myself when I was younger, I've become more

812
01:07:00.039 --> 01:07:06.519
sensitive towards other people as I got older. It's yeah,

813
01:07:06.679 --> 01:07:09.239
I think that's probably what it was. So I'm I've

814
01:07:09.239 --> 01:07:13.360
always been a sensitive person, I would say to a degree,

815
01:07:13.960 --> 01:07:23.760
depending on the situation, depending on my mood. But yeah,

816
01:07:23.960 --> 01:07:26.400
so I don't really want someone to be doing that

817
01:07:26.519 --> 01:07:32.360
with Uncle Sausages flat going in there shouting out about

818
01:07:32.400 --> 01:07:39.599
how whatever messy it is or or saw this rubbish

819
01:07:39.719 --> 01:07:48.840
or because that would just be disrespectful. So I'm kind

820
01:07:48.840 --> 01:07:53.800
of in my in my mind thinking, well, maybe I'll

821
01:07:53.880 --> 01:07:57.199
say to Uncle Sausages, if you want me to start

822
01:07:57.280 --> 01:08:01.159
bagging stuff up, clearing out the place so that when

823
01:08:01.159 --> 01:08:04.039
the council come, all they've got to do is just

824
01:08:04.039 --> 01:08:06.960
get rid of the furniture. So I can't I got

825
01:08:06.960 --> 01:08:08.639
nowhere to put the furniture, but I can get rid

826
01:08:08.679 --> 01:08:12.599
of the belongings and see if he's anything he needs. So,

827
01:08:13.400 --> 01:08:16.199
you know, because he's got thousands of well or thousands

828
01:08:16.199 --> 01:08:20.920
be probably hundreds of newspaper articles on various sporting events.

829
01:08:21.560 --> 01:08:27.159
He's got tickets from sporting events that he's attended, Yeah,

830
01:08:28.760 --> 01:08:34.119
so much. Because he loves sports. That's his it's not

831
01:08:34.199 --> 01:08:41.720
just a hobby, it's his life, but it's weird today.

832
01:08:41.880 --> 01:08:46.520
He said, the iPad's not working, or it wasn't working properly,

833
01:08:46.600 --> 01:08:50.760
or he couldn't get it to work. And I said, well,

834
01:08:50.319 --> 01:08:55.279
I'll try and talk it through with you. And I said,

835
01:08:55.279 --> 01:08:58.880
so you want the BBC app don't you actually want

836
01:08:58.920 --> 01:09:02.000
to watch Wimbledon? He said, oh, I can't involved. We've

837
01:09:02.039 --> 01:09:06.279
been Wimbledon. I didn't think I'd ever hear that sentence

838
01:09:06.319 --> 01:09:09.760
come out of his mouth. Didn't care about Wimbledon, the

839
01:09:09.800 --> 01:09:14.000
wimbled men's finals, which is one of the biggest sporting

840
01:09:14.039 --> 01:09:17.199
events in this country in a year. It's one of

841
01:09:17.239 --> 01:09:21.159
the biggest events the well, the men's and the female

842
01:09:21.159 --> 01:09:25.640
finals and maybe doubles and the wheelchair as well, but

843
01:09:26.000 --> 01:09:28.119
just the finals, you know, the final weekend, That's what

844
01:09:28.159 --> 01:09:34.000
I'm trying to say. And he just didn't have any interest. Yeah,

845
01:09:34.039 --> 01:09:36.600
he's been watching Wimbledon. He's had it on TV for

846
01:09:36.640 --> 01:09:41.279
the last two weeks in the other ward because he

847
01:09:41.319 --> 01:09:44.800
had a TV which was on the kind of not

848
01:09:44.880 --> 01:09:48.479
a ceiling but wasn't on the ceiling, but it was

849
01:09:48.560 --> 01:09:51.000
quite high up, so he had that and he was

850
01:09:51.000 --> 01:09:57.439
playing the whole time, you know, all day long. So yeah,

851
01:09:57.479 --> 01:10:08.800
it's kind of strange, any any any very strange. I

852
01:10:08.840 --> 01:10:11.399
do hope though, if he gets to go into a

853
01:10:12.520 --> 01:10:19.159
care home, that it's not too far away, because it's

854
01:10:19.479 --> 01:10:25.159
cost me a fortune getting to him the last three

855
01:10:25.359 --> 01:10:32.159
and a bit weeks, and the further he is away,

856
01:10:32.319 --> 01:10:34.119
the less. So I'm going to be able to travel

857
01:10:34.880 --> 01:10:40.000
to see him, because it's not just about expense, which

858
01:10:40.079 --> 01:10:45.079
is quite a big thing, but it's also time and

859
01:10:46.800 --> 01:10:49.119
leaving a little Vinnie on his own for too long.

860
01:10:51.039 --> 01:10:53.159
I know, technically I should be able to leave him

861
01:10:53.199 --> 01:11:00.239
all day long, but he's never been left alone. And

862
01:11:00.279 --> 01:11:03.520
since I had him, I've been with him pretty much

863
01:11:03.600 --> 01:11:07.960
twenty four hours a day for two and a half years.

864
01:11:08.359 --> 01:11:15.199
However long it's been, so to suddenly be leaving him

865
01:11:15.239 --> 01:11:21.279
alone for five six hours is I think it's been

866
01:11:21.279 --> 01:11:26.680
a bit traumatic for him and he never gets used

867
01:11:26.720 --> 01:11:33.560
to it. I mean, I have left him alone for

868
01:11:33.560 --> 01:11:40.119
a few hours, like really rarely, very rare, but generally

869
01:11:40.279 --> 01:11:44.199
if I go out, I take him with me pretty

870
01:11:44.239 --> 01:11:47.319
much all the time, and I haven't been able to

871
01:11:47.319 --> 01:11:51.079
do that. And you know why I didn't go. I

872
01:11:51.119 --> 01:11:53.479
didn't take him to the hospital. Organized to take him

873
01:11:53.520 --> 01:11:56.239
to the hospital, but I couldn't take him, you know

874
01:11:56.279 --> 01:11:59.159
why not. This was a couple of weeks ago because

875
01:11:59.159 --> 01:12:04.199
I was is it in that other neighbor who was

876
01:12:04.239 --> 01:12:06.239
on oxygen, and I thought i'd go and visit her.

877
01:12:06.520 --> 01:12:09.199
Can't take Vinie into that ward, so I'd have to

878
01:12:09.279 --> 01:12:12.640
leave him here. Because you know, I was visiting uncle Sausages.

879
01:12:13.159 --> 01:12:15.720
I thought I visited her as well, So I didn't

880
01:12:15.720 --> 01:12:18.760
take Annie. So Uncle's Sausages, didn't get to say Vinny,

881
01:12:19.159 --> 01:12:23.119
who he's been looking forward to seeing. Then I find

882
01:12:23.119 --> 01:12:33.039
out what she's been up to. Absolutely amazing. Let it go, baby,

883
01:12:33.119 --> 01:12:37.079
let it go. I have no you haven't, I know,

884
01:12:37.159 --> 01:12:44.960
I haven't. Oh, so you know this. I'm hoping that

885
01:12:49.000 --> 01:12:54.880
something happens in a positive way. As far as his

886
01:12:57.479 --> 01:13:02.840
being moved out this week. It'd be great if he

887
01:13:02.920 --> 01:13:05.199
can find somewhere or if they can find somewhere for

888
01:13:05.399 --> 01:13:12.319
him that's relatively close to hear, although he's not going

889
01:13:12.399 --> 01:13:15.039
to ask for that, but he you know, as long

890
01:13:15.079 --> 01:13:18.319
as it's central, even central in the town, I can

891
01:13:18.359 --> 01:13:20.640
get to. If it's central, I can get there a

892
01:13:20.680 --> 01:13:23.159
lot lot easier than where he is at the moment.

893
01:13:24.319 --> 01:13:29.199
You know, if it's just one bus rather than two

894
01:13:29.199 --> 01:13:38.720
buses and then I can you know, just he'll have

895
01:13:38.880 --> 01:13:46.079
people around him. And all the nurses were saying that

896
01:13:46.119 --> 01:13:48.640
they liked him. He was a lovely man, and you

897
01:13:48.680 --> 01:14:05.159
know he's he's a friendly bloke. I think he's just,

898
01:14:05.479 --> 01:14:07.560
you know, kind of had enough of being there, really

899
01:14:08.439 --> 01:14:14.640
just wants to wants to get out, wants to have

900
01:14:14.680 --> 01:14:17.800
a bit of freedom. He wants his parole. That's what

901
01:14:17.840 --> 01:14:27.880
he wants. He wants his paroles. So he does bless him.

902
01:14:28.039 --> 01:14:31.199
So it was really weird. I didn't made an image yesterday,

903
01:14:34.000 --> 01:14:40.720
used chet GPT. All I asked is make a man,

904
01:14:40.720 --> 01:14:47.479
elderly man made of sausages. Okay, his uncle sausages. Isn't

905
01:14:47.479 --> 01:14:55.880
he have sitting on a bed, Have Jack Russell next

906
01:14:55.880 --> 01:14:59.920
to the bed licking his lips? And then I said,

907
01:15:00.159 --> 01:15:06.880
add a whiskey, wispy white hair or wavy white hair,

908
01:15:07.720 --> 01:15:14.760
and a baseball cap. And the ironic thing is the

909
01:15:14.840 --> 01:15:20.880
face actually looks like him, like he's got the same

910
01:15:21.000 --> 01:15:24.039
kind of same features. I'm talking about the same kind

911
01:15:24.039 --> 01:15:27.000
of eyes, same kind of mouth, same kind of jaw.

912
01:15:28.439 --> 01:15:34.119
He was uncanny. It's really strange, especially with that baseball

913
01:15:34.119 --> 01:15:36.920
cap and the hair, because he's got quite long hair

914
01:15:36.960 --> 01:15:40.439
and it's very you know, quite you know, I don't know,

915
01:15:41.119 --> 01:15:44.239
it looks like him, not the sausages park, because he's

916
01:15:44.239 --> 01:15:48.720
not made of sausages. We call him uncalled sausages or

917
01:15:48.880 --> 01:15:54.680
Vinnie does, because that's the thing that he gets thro him.

918
01:15:54.920 --> 01:15:56.800
He goes to the I don't know if he goes

919
01:15:56.920 --> 01:15:59.560
up the road to the shops, but he gets these

920
01:15:59.560 --> 01:16:02.560
sausage is in a pack and there's those robbery ones

921
01:16:02.600 --> 01:16:05.560
that I don't think are fit for human consumption, but

922
01:16:05.600 --> 01:16:09.439
I think they are sold for humans and their robbery

923
01:16:09.600 --> 01:16:15.920
and savaloi ish I think. Never liked savalois, could not,

924
01:16:16.039 --> 01:16:20.359
oh savalois. I couldn't believe when people used to come

925
01:16:20.359 --> 01:16:23.319
into the chip shop and actually ask for a savoy.

926
01:16:23.600 --> 01:16:29.840
They were willing to pay to eat a savaloi. Literally,

927
01:16:29.880 --> 01:16:34.279
they were willing to give their own money. You couldn't. Honestly,

928
01:16:34.319 --> 01:16:38.479
I wouldn't. I wouldn't eat it if you gave me money. Savalois, Oh,

929
01:16:38.640 --> 01:16:41.840
I never liked them. But anyway, it's there's kind of

930
01:16:41.880 --> 01:16:46.680
those kinds of sausages robbery, not really sausages, but this

931
01:16:46.720 --> 01:16:51.119
one air he loves them, absolutely loves them. He'd eat

932
01:16:51.119 --> 01:16:56.119
a whole pack if he could in one sitting. He

933
01:16:56.159 --> 01:16:59.119
doesn't get to, but he would if he could. So

934
01:16:59.119 --> 01:17:05.119
that's why he cause Uncle sausages, Uncle sausages. He's also

935
01:17:05.279 --> 01:17:08.920
got a lady who doesn't have a dog, but she likes.

936
01:17:08.960 --> 01:17:13.159
All the dogs love her around here because she's they

937
01:17:13.239 --> 01:17:17.800
all call her nanny treats. So she's known as Nanny

938
01:17:17.800 --> 01:17:21.800
Treats by all the dogs. Finnish started that one as well,

939
01:17:24.239 --> 01:17:26.960
and all the dogs even It's quite weird because some

940
01:17:27.000 --> 01:17:28.600
of the other dog owners are starting to call her

941
01:17:28.640 --> 01:17:36.039
nanny treats. That's funny. If you say something enough people

942
01:17:36.079 --> 01:17:38.680
to start to pick it up, won't they. I guess, Oh,

943
01:17:38.680 --> 01:17:45.600
it's nanny treats. Wow, it's catching on baby Vinny. If

944
01:17:45.640 --> 01:17:50.159
I actually say to vinny's nanny treats and he looks

945
01:17:50.239 --> 01:17:53.159
up like where you could say, oh, well, I've just

946
01:17:53.199 --> 01:17:57.600
said the word treats, but no, he's looking for nanny treats.

947
01:17:58.359 --> 01:18:01.560
He knows the difference between just saying treats and nanny treats.

948
01:18:03.359 --> 01:18:06.159
And he can spot off from a mile away, which

949
01:18:06.159 --> 01:18:11.319
is an exaggeration, but he can see her, you know,

950
01:18:12.479 --> 01:18:14.279
you know when you can see the outline of someone

951
01:18:14.319 --> 01:18:17.079
from a distance, but maybe not see their face properly

952
01:18:17.600 --> 01:18:21.880
to not really know whether or not to wave to them.

953
01:18:22.239 --> 01:18:27.039
He knows who it is. Maybe he's just got much

954
01:18:27.079 --> 01:18:33.199
better eyesight than me, and I don't generally, but sometimes

955
01:18:33.239 --> 01:18:35.199
I let him off the lead. Well, I let go

956
01:18:35.319 --> 01:18:40.600
of the lead and he runs to her, because I

957
01:18:40.680 --> 01:18:43.720
know that once he gets to her, he's not leaving

958
01:18:43.760 --> 01:18:49.640
her side. He will not leave her because I literally

959
01:18:49.720 --> 01:18:53.479
have to drag him away because he will eat every

960
01:18:53.520 --> 01:18:59.279
single treat that she gives him. He adores her, absolutely

961
01:18:59.319 --> 01:19:01.399
adores her, and even if she didn't give him any

962
01:19:01.439 --> 01:19:05.439
treats ever again, he'd still get excited to see her

963
01:19:05.840 --> 01:19:11.239
because he loves her, because he just she adores him.

964
01:19:11.439 --> 01:19:13.159
I mean, she loves all the dogs, but I think

965
01:19:13.199 --> 01:19:17.000
he's one of her favorite ones because he's been And

966
01:19:17.039 --> 01:19:20.119
there's another one who lives next door, but this one's

967
01:19:20.159 --> 01:19:23.640
been in a house at least once. She let him

968
01:19:23.640 --> 01:19:25.960
in and she ran her around and he loved it,

969
01:19:26.159 --> 01:19:33.039
absolutely loved it. So she's So that's Nanny treats and

970
01:19:33.079 --> 01:19:38.439
you've got Uncle sausages. There's no one else at the moment. Really,

971
01:19:39.680 --> 01:19:42.319
there's a few people that I see it. You know

972
01:19:42.439 --> 01:19:46.000
when I take him out. But there hasn't got any

973
01:19:46.079 --> 01:19:48.720
nicknames for any of them. There's del Boy, but that's

974
01:19:48.720 --> 01:19:51.439
a different person. That's not the one in the hospital.

975
01:19:51.520 --> 01:19:55.840
That's just a wheeler and dealer that me and Luke

976
01:19:55.960 --> 01:19:59.039
used to call Del Boy. He worked on the market

977
01:19:59.680 --> 01:20:01.960
for the as like selling stuff out of his garage

978
01:20:02.000 --> 01:20:04.479
and just it'd buy stuff and sell it. That's what

979
01:20:04.560 --> 01:20:10.199
it was, market trader, but we call him del Boy.

980
01:20:11.000 --> 01:20:16.119
Other than that, there was Pants, but he's don't live

981
01:20:16.159 --> 01:20:21.279
around her anymore. And the lawnmower man, he doesn't live

982
01:20:21.359 --> 01:20:27.199
anymore because he'd spent about literally about eight hours mowing

983
01:20:27.319 --> 01:20:32.479
a tiny little beer grass. He taking so many pills

984
01:20:32.560 --> 01:20:35.119
or whatever he's took, and he would literally just be

985
01:20:35.199 --> 01:20:42.880
standing there, one lader grass at a time. But with

986
01:20:42.960 --> 01:20:45.640
a lawnmower. I don't know how it's even possible. And

987
01:20:45.680 --> 01:20:48.960
all we hear is that lawnmower starting and stopping, starting

988
01:20:49.000 --> 01:20:54.479
and stopping from morning to night, all day and not

989
01:20:55.359 --> 01:20:58.560
so I called him a lawnmower man, among other things.

990
01:21:02.640 --> 01:21:12.000
We have a name of the people. No, that's it. Really,

991
01:21:14.520 --> 01:21:19.039
I'm now beginning to wonder what my nickname is. Oh please,

992
01:21:20.239 --> 01:21:27.840
I'm worried to even ask. But that's it, really, that's

993
01:21:28.079 --> 01:21:31.199
really what's happened this week, being a backward and forward

994
01:21:32.000 --> 01:21:41.600
dealt with taxi drivers and bus drivers, passengers, the heats,

995
01:21:43.359 --> 01:21:48.000
all the nurses, and it's been a very strange week.

996
01:21:48.800 --> 01:21:51.800
And then Uncle's sausages started to get a little bit

997
01:21:52.920 --> 01:21:59.039
agitated thinking that people were doing stuff, and like, ah,

998
01:22:00.000 --> 01:22:06.279
he got very very complicated, very difficult. But it seems

999
01:22:06.359 --> 01:22:14.960
to be hopefully headed towards the right direction in a

1000
01:22:15.079 --> 01:22:20.840
sense of him being discharged. That's what I mean by

1001
01:22:20.840 --> 01:22:28.159
the right direction, and fingures crossed, he will end up

1002
01:22:28.840 --> 01:22:39.039
in a nice place where he's he feels okay, I

1003
01:22:39.079 --> 01:22:41.359
know what I mean when I say that, but I'm

1004
01:22:41.399 --> 01:22:44.760
still I'm not sure what it means whatever okay is

1005
01:22:45.159 --> 01:22:51.920
that he feels I want to use a word happy,

1006
01:22:52.000 --> 01:22:56.239
but that's probably the last word. Maybe, But I'd like

1007
01:22:56.359 --> 01:23:01.720
him to feel that he's been looked after and that

1008
01:23:01.840 --> 01:23:04.680
he feels safe, And yeah, I guess that's it, isn't

1009
01:23:04.680 --> 01:23:08.079
it to feel safe and to feel looked after, to

1010
01:23:08.159 --> 01:23:14.760
feel heard when he speaks, to be listened to, and maybe,

1011
01:23:14.920 --> 01:23:20.439
you know, make a couple of friends along the way,

1012
01:23:20.560 --> 01:23:30.439
and yeah, very strange times. All my glasses just fell off. Well, actually,

1013
01:23:30.479 --> 01:23:34.840
I just what did I do? I did something and

1014
01:23:34.840 --> 01:23:37.439
I knocked my glasses off with my thumb. I didn't

1015
01:23:37.520 --> 01:23:39.760
just fall off at all. But you want to know that?

1016
01:23:39.800 --> 01:23:42.000
Why did I have to tell you the truth? Damn it.

1017
01:23:44.279 --> 01:23:46.199
So I'm going to have a Chelsea bun with icing

1018
01:23:46.279 --> 01:23:52.159
and a big cherry on the top, pretended, No, I

1019
01:23:52.159 --> 01:23:55.800
want to eat that, and then I might make myself

1020
01:23:55.840 --> 01:23:57.640
another couple of t year as well to have that with.

1021
01:24:00.880 --> 01:24:11.479
And then I will possibly edit this recording. It's now

1022
01:24:12.720 --> 01:24:17.439
what time is it? It's four o three, so I've

1023
01:24:17.439 --> 01:24:22.840
been talking for nearly an hour and a half. I

1024
01:24:22.960 --> 01:24:28.159
probably watched maybe I'll watch a move ov a move,

1025
01:24:29.119 --> 01:24:36.680
I don't know, and then I'll have an early night tonight,

1026
01:24:36.880 --> 01:24:39.640
even though I spent half a day in bed. Oh

1027
01:24:40.000 --> 01:24:43.520
I woke up. I I just remembered. Do you know what?

1028
01:24:43.640 --> 01:24:47.680
Here's how this is changing me. I woke up this morning.

1029
01:24:48.800 --> 01:24:51.239
I went to bed at eight, which I've been doing

1030
01:24:51.239 --> 01:24:58.439
a little bit during the week. Yeah, just I'm kind

1031
01:24:58.479 --> 01:25:01.560
of ready to go to bed at that time, so

1032
01:25:01.600 --> 01:25:03.560
we're in a bit of eight. Woke up at half

1033
01:25:05.199 --> 01:25:10.319
Oh yeah, I woke up at half twelve. I woke

1034
01:25:10.399 --> 01:25:12.199
up a couple of times in that period as well,

1035
01:25:13.399 --> 01:25:19.960
including getting a phone call, and I had this dream

1036
01:25:22.079 --> 01:25:26.560
where I actually said out loud and I felt it

1037
01:25:26.640 --> 01:25:32.640
that it's the first time I've ever been happy, And

1038
01:25:32.680 --> 01:25:42.159
it involved a lady that involved fall in love, and

1039
01:25:42.239 --> 01:25:44.680
it was weird. I was kind of pursuing her, not

1040
01:25:44.720 --> 01:25:48.199
in a kind of weird way, but just but she

1041
01:25:48.439 --> 01:25:52.279
was allowing me in a sense like she, I don't know,

1042
01:25:52.560 --> 01:25:54.680
it is a weird one because her dream so it's

1043
01:25:54.720 --> 01:25:59.119
all completely involved elephants and swings and stuff. You know,

1044
01:25:59.119 --> 01:26:04.880
it could be ice cream, all kinds of weird things involved.

1045
01:26:06.159 --> 01:26:18.159
But basically I remember saying to her in this stream,

1046
01:26:18.159 --> 01:26:20.279
telling her that I loved her or I love her,

1047
01:26:21.159 --> 01:26:22.960
I want to spend the rest of my life with her,

1048
01:26:23.159 --> 01:26:28.039
or something like that. And she was concerned. She said,

1049
01:26:28.039 --> 01:26:30.720
how long was that going to be? I said why?

1050
01:26:30.840 --> 01:26:32.840
She said, well, I've got things to do, I've got

1051
01:26:32.840 --> 01:26:36.720
to make plans. So it was weird, and then I

1052
01:26:36.760 --> 01:26:39.720
woke up, but there was that whole thing of like, Okay,

1053
01:26:40.199 --> 01:26:44.600
it's the first time I felt happy, like that was

1054
01:26:44.680 --> 01:26:50.560
the first time, and it was a strange time to

1055
01:26:50.600 --> 01:26:57.520
wake up, like, okay, brilliant, and I'm partially awake, you know,

1056
01:26:57.640 --> 01:27:00.560
because half twelve I've been spending a fair bit of

1057
01:27:00.600 --> 01:27:05.600
time in bed yesterday afternoon or during the day actually,

1058
01:27:08.680 --> 01:27:14.600
and the boxing was on Live Boxing, which was multiple

1059
01:27:14.600 --> 01:27:18.560
world title fights, well a couple, yeah, so I just

1060
01:27:19.840 --> 01:27:22.199
I thought another I could to watch it. I'm going

1061
01:27:22.279 --> 01:27:25.079
to go back to bed because you know, I don't

1062
01:27:25.119 --> 01:27:26.479
get up in the middle of the night anymore to

1063
01:27:26.520 --> 01:27:31.840
watch boxing. And this little voice, well it was not

1064
01:27:31.840 --> 01:27:34.119
really little voice, but a thought came into my head

1065
01:27:34.239 --> 01:27:39.399
said why are you putting it off? Why put off

1066
01:27:39.439 --> 01:27:44.119
something that you enjoy? And I thought of Uncle sausages,

1067
01:27:47.239 --> 01:27:51.399
and I thought, yeah, why am I putting that off?

1068
01:27:51.399 --> 01:27:56.399
Why am I not sitting up? Okay, it's disruptive to

1069
01:27:56.479 --> 01:27:59.079
the next day because I'm gonna be tired all day Sunday.

1070
01:28:03.119 --> 01:28:06.079
But at the same time, it's a lie. It's a

1071
01:28:06.199 --> 01:28:08.880
live event, it's a big event in the boxing calendar,

1072
01:28:09.920 --> 01:28:13.560
and it was a really good event as well. Every

1073
01:28:13.560 --> 01:28:19.880
fight was good. Why why am I just like and

1074
01:28:20.880 --> 01:28:23.439
I'll go to bed, and I need to make sure

1075
01:28:23.479 --> 01:28:26.960
on bed to at least four o'clock. It's twelve thirty's

1076
01:28:27.039 --> 01:28:32.119
too early to be getting up. So this whole thing

1077
01:28:32.159 --> 01:28:35.159
seems to be changing my attitude a little bit to

1078
01:28:36.920 --> 01:28:43.560
the whole idea of putting stuff off. Yeah, anyway, it's

1079
01:28:43.920 --> 01:28:46.119
it was a good night and I have been tired

1080
01:28:46.159 --> 01:28:51.520
all day, bless. But also in a few weeks time,

1081
01:28:51.600 --> 01:28:57.760
there's the Canelo Crawford fight, which is is it September

1082
01:28:58.199 --> 01:29:01.199
I think, but that it's going to be on during

1083
01:29:01.239 --> 01:29:04.640
the night and I'm watching it hopefully. I'm going to

1084
01:29:04.680 --> 01:29:10.840
watch that because that's arguably the biggest fight of the year,

1085
01:29:12.399 --> 01:29:17.880
arguably just from the sense of the two biggest names

1086
01:29:17.920 --> 01:29:23.600
in boxing fighting each other. It's huge, two unified world

1087
01:29:23.680 --> 01:29:32.880
champions fighting each other. I mean it, Yeah, it's quite rare,

1088
01:29:32.920 --> 01:29:36.479
and that happens, it does happen, but this is, like,

1089
01:29:36.760 --> 01:29:40.439
you know, it's a big deal in the boxing world.

1090
01:29:40.439 --> 01:29:41.920
So I'm going to be watching that and that's going

1091
01:29:42.000 --> 01:29:45.039
to be early hours in the morning on I think

1092
01:29:45.119 --> 01:29:55.159
September twelfth or thirteen, something like that or fourteenth. Yeah,

1093
01:29:55.239 --> 01:29:57.680
and then next week is the world heavyweight title fight,

1094
01:29:58.039 --> 01:30:01.520
but that's in England, so that's good. And that's Duboi

1095
01:30:01.800 --> 01:30:09.319
against Usik for all the belts. So that's something to

1096
01:30:09.359 --> 01:30:14.119
look forward to. So I hope that Uncle Sausages by

1097
01:30:14.199 --> 01:30:20.239
next weekend, Uncle Sausages is out of the hospital, living

1098
01:30:20.399 --> 01:30:25.319
in a decent place, I mean where you know, somewhere

1099
01:30:25.319 --> 01:30:31.520
that he wants to be, that he's happy with. And

1100
01:30:31.560 --> 01:30:36.399
I'm sitting here watching the boxing with Little Vinny. That's

1101
01:30:36.520 --> 01:30:43.000
my eating some pizza. I hope, Yeah, that's my dream.

1102
01:30:43.479 --> 01:30:46.319
So I'm going to go. Thank you for listening. Remember

1103
01:30:46.840 --> 01:30:50.279
to be kind to yourself, because you do deserve to

1104
01:30:50.319 --> 01:30:55.279
be happy. Be gentle of yourself. You deserve to feel safe,

1105
01:30:58.079 --> 01:31:15.920
lots of love by relax in a more deep and

1106
01:31:19.760 --> 01:31:27.119
meaningful way, maybe in a way that can not just

1107
01:31:27.399 --> 01:31:37.520
allow you to feel calmer now and throughout the time

1108
01:31:38.199 --> 01:31:46.560
we spend together here, not just relaxed at the end

1109
01:31:46.600 --> 01:31:51.039
of the recording when it's finished and you can enjoy

1110
01:31:51.239 --> 01:32:08.600
that sense of comfort and peace, but also I think

1111
01:32:08.680 --> 01:32:19.840
it would be nice to have those feelings of relaxation

1112
01:32:22.199 --> 01:32:36.439
continue for longer after the recording has ended, so that

1113
01:32:36.560 --> 01:32:49.000
you can still benefit from listening to my voice, maybe

1114
01:32:49.079 --> 01:33:00.479
in a few hours time, perhaps tomorrow, and then by

1115
01:33:00.560 --> 01:33:08.520
listening regularly, especially if you find like some people do

1116
01:33:08.880 --> 01:33:13.359
and myself as well, sometimes I find one particular recording

1117
01:33:14.039 --> 01:33:22.840
that really resonates with me, and I just listen to

1118
01:33:22.920 --> 01:33:35.800
it over and over again every morning, every evening. There

1119
01:33:35.880 --> 01:33:40.880
was this recording from We're going back to about nineteen

1120
01:33:41.000 --> 01:33:48.760
ninety nine. It wasn't hypnosis, but it was a guided visualizations.

1121
01:33:48.880 --> 01:33:50.880
It kind of was hypnosis, really.

1122
01:33:53.079 --> 01:33:53.560
And.

1123
01:33:55.199 --> 01:33:58.560
I managed to find it again and it still has

1124
01:33:58.600 --> 01:34:04.199
the same effect on me. And part of it was

1125
01:34:07.840 --> 01:34:18.920
the person's voice relaxed me. She just felt so peaceful,

1126
01:34:20.960 --> 01:34:27.439
and I'd look forward to listening to her in the

1127
01:34:27.520 --> 01:34:38.159
morning and in the evening, and I knew before even

1128
01:34:38.960 --> 01:34:47.479
pressing the play button that since I've done that pressed

1129
01:34:47.479 --> 01:34:56.039
the play button. This was in the days of CD

1130
01:34:56.199 --> 01:35:04.880
players pressed a play button. In fact, it might have

1131
01:35:04.960 --> 01:35:09.399
even been a tape recorder. I'd lie down on the

1132
01:35:09.439 --> 01:35:22.880
bed and then even without necessarily listening to her words

1133
01:35:26.199 --> 01:35:35.520
because I had them memorized. Really, it was as if

1134
01:35:35.600 --> 01:35:46.800
my body knew exactly what to do, and the muscles

1135
01:35:47.079 --> 01:36:08.439
just almost went into automatic relaxation, and I remember my

1136
01:36:08.600 --> 01:36:22.520
mind would slow down. Now. Now, I was listening to

1137
01:36:22.600 --> 01:36:31.840
this recording in the early days of learning hypnosis, and

1138
01:36:32.079 --> 01:36:41.000
long before I ever made any videos or audio recordings myself,

1139
01:36:42.199 --> 01:36:45.560
because I didn't start doing that till two thousand and six.

1140
01:36:52.479 --> 01:37:08.119
I knew, I knew how how helpful I found being

1141
01:37:08.159 --> 01:37:17.359
able to just let go, to have that trust in

1142
01:37:17.439 --> 01:37:27.880
the person that I'm listening to, knowing that it's going

1143
01:37:27.920 --> 01:37:38.439
to be just as relaxing, if not more so. Each

1144
01:37:38.560 --> 01:37:45.159
time you hear my voice, you may feel the same.

1145
01:37:51.520 --> 01:38:02.439
Some people have been listening to me for over a decade,

1146
01:38:06.960 --> 01:38:11.000
maybe not solidly, obviously, not twenty four hours a day,

1147
01:38:12.720 --> 01:38:28.199
but maybe people come back. Some people maybe listen every day.

1148
01:38:31.000 --> 01:38:36.960
That's something that I do which you may not realize

1149
01:38:39.399 --> 01:38:57.960
by listening, is when I record these recordings. Now, for example,

1150
01:39:02.520 --> 01:39:14.720
I also am affected by the words that I say.

1151
01:39:15.560 --> 01:39:24.880
So if I set you focus on your feet, notice

1152
01:39:25.000 --> 01:39:32.199
your feet relaxing, I will be focusing on my feet.

1153
01:39:37.079 --> 01:39:54.479
I will be noticing my feet relaxing. If I said,

1154
01:39:54.640 --> 01:40:02.319
focus on your hands, and maybe notice the difference between

1155
01:40:02.359 --> 01:40:13.199
each hand. Perhaps notice the air in the room, the

1156
01:40:13.319 --> 01:40:17.960
temperature of the room. On the backs of your hands.

1157
01:40:25.760 --> 01:40:29.640
You may start to notice what almost feels like a

1158
01:40:29.800 --> 01:40:37.840
very light breeze, even though there may not be any

1159
01:40:38.239 --> 01:40:48.600
type of breeze at all where you are right now.

1160
01:40:51.359 --> 01:41:01.960
And as you become aware of your hands, I'm also

1161
01:41:02.279 --> 01:41:30.479
aware of how relaxed my hands our feeling now and

1162
01:41:30.680 --> 01:41:37.600
when it comes to potentially drifting off to sleep, which

1163
01:41:37.680 --> 01:41:51.760
may be the reason you're listening. I also feel drowsy

1164
01:41:54.039 --> 01:42:07.520
when I make these recordings. I also notice my mind drifting.

1165
01:42:15.399 --> 01:42:28.039
In fact, at times I've actually fallen asleep without even noticing,

1166
01:42:32.880 --> 01:42:43.960
and then I carry on talking. It's only where I

1167
01:42:44.039 --> 01:42:53.439
listen back to do the editing, I hear snoring, and

1168
01:42:53.520 --> 01:43:03.359
I think I don't remember snoring. I remember talking. There

1169
01:43:03.439 --> 01:43:10.600
is this snall as a pick turned up. That's why

1170
01:43:10.600 --> 01:43:18.319
I sound like when I snore. How I get really

1171
01:43:18.479 --> 01:43:31.960
into a whole experience. I don't know how you feel.

1172
01:43:38.159 --> 01:43:44.720
How relaxed do you feel in your feet, how relaxed

1173
01:43:48.560 --> 01:44:09.640
you feel in your hands. I have noticed more and

1174
01:44:09.840 --> 01:44:28.720
more that the more relaxed, deeper level of comfort you feel,

1175
01:44:32.359 --> 01:44:48.560
the easier your breathing becomes. It's almost like that additional

1176
01:44:51.680 --> 01:45:15.079
muscle relaxation. So this allows you debreath easier without necessarily

1177
01:45:17.880 --> 01:45:45.920
focusing on your breath. However, being able to notice the

1178
01:45:45.960 --> 01:46:15.840
ease in which you breathe so naturally, you breathe so

1179
01:46:16.199 --> 01:46:59.479
very easily and smoothly. Whenever I imagine my breathing improving.

1180
01:47:05.199 --> 01:47:18.560
When I've got my eyes closed, I tend to visualize

1181
01:47:20.640 --> 01:47:35.000
a beautiful field with trees and flowers producing all that

1182
01:47:37.079 --> 01:48:09.840
life giving oxygen, and it feels not two if nothing else,

1183
01:48:13.039 --> 01:48:47.159
just taking some time away from everything, enjoying that feeling

1184
01:48:47.560 --> 01:49:38.159
of peace, serenity with a joyful heart. Time seems to

1185
01:49:38.319 --> 01:50:13.439
just drip by, so very slowly, relaxed, so deeply peaceful,

1186
01:50:23.359 --> 01:51:05.520
completely unattached to any thoughts whatsoever in this moment, completely

1187
01:51:05.840 --> 01:52:01.199
free noticing that your mind has slowed down, loaded down

1188
01:52:23.600 --> 01:52:52.159
because nothing really requires your attention. You can enjoy the

1189
01:52:52.159 --> 01:53:04.760
physical sensations of allowing this stressed drip out of your body,

1190
01:53:11.279 --> 01:53:35.119
dripping out of every part of your body and being

1191
01:53:35.439 --> 01:54:14.079
released from your brain. H your mind slowly but surely,

1192
01:54:20.920 --> 01:54:57.840
the muscles in your legs relax res res so very

1193
01:54:57.880 --> 01:55:38.079
deep thing lacks so deeply, and the feelings, the pleasant

1194
01:55:38.279 --> 01:56:03.079
feelings in your arms and shoulders, deepening each part of

1195
01:56:03.159 --> 01:56:44.800
your body further and deeper and deeper. Noticin the feelings

1196
01:56:45.239 --> 01:57:11.720
in the back of your neck, the feelings in your wrists,

1197
01:57:44.800 --> 01:58:37.239
muscles in front of your body, oh so feeling peaceful deeping.

1198
01:58:41.840 --> 01:58:52.439
There's a sense of peace spreads through your very cool.

1199
01:59:22.640 --> 01:59:29.399
Even when you.

1200
01:59:27.079 --> 01:59:51.800
Focus on your mind, her mind becomes be and slower

1201
02:00:08.119 --> 02:01:27.680
and deep, relaxing, so very slow. Your stomach PA's fell

1202
02:01:27.840 --> 02:02:14.359
in your stomach, held back. Notice, Notice how relaxed you

1203
02:02:14.720 --> 02:02:52.399
now feel in the hole of your back. In a

1204
02:02:52.680 --> 02:03:01.760
spy from your brain all the way down the middle

1205
02:03:01.800 --> 02:03:13.640
of your back, sending and receiving millions of messages every day,

1206
02:03:24.680 --> 02:04:44.439
deep comfort, increasing deeply relaxed. Your knees relax spreading those

1207
02:04:44.560 --> 02:04:53.800
signals down your spine or cord into air. Every part

1208
02:04:54.159 --> 02:05:12.319
of your body, m your shins and your calf muscles

1209
02:05:39.720 --> 02:06:08.920
outpers feelings of peace hm and tranquility spreading through your body,

1210
02:06:13.920 --> 02:06:30.199
tips of your toes to your eyes, your fingers, all

1211
02:06:30.199 --> 02:07:12.119
the way to your lower back and letting go, reating

1212
02:07:15.560 --> 02:07:58.199
place to drift in mind, wondering away, happy to let go,

1213
02:08:01.600 --> 02:09:07.800
let go completely, liquor said, tranquil your ole body enjoying

1214
02:09:07.960 --> 02:09:09.359
a sensor.

1215
02:09:33.520 --> 02:11:24.079
Listing goven more, Hey, enjoy.

1216
02:11:29.279 --> 02:11:34.319
The space, this space.

1217
02:11:36.760 --> 02:11:37.960
Of peace.

1218
02:11:41.079 --> 02:14:07.439
And safety, fay letting God. Maybe we can just focus

1219
02:14:07.840 --> 02:14:16.520
on the different parts of your body, just to notice

1220
02:14:42.560 --> 02:15:45.000
your forehead and your eyes. Future so loose, noticing in

1221
02:15:45.119 --> 02:17:53.639
the sense of complete freedom, absolute freedom, dress, day, pace, fall, energy, pace,

1222
02:17:54.319 --> 02:18:00.760
to breathe silich ees.

1223
02:18:01.120 --> 02:19:05.440
Yeah, yes, you may have.

1224
02:19:09.000 --> 02:20:08.920
Or may not have noticed your mind drifting peaceful, move

1225
02:20:09.360 --> 02:20:29.879
any even more deeply in the direction of dital blissful pace,

1226
02:20:34.120 --> 02:22:37.879
blissphul pace, terrest to tol pace, sure, come let it go,

1227
02:23:02.840 --> 02:23:39.520
peace of mind Rex body c rex.

1228
02:23:47.639 --> 02:23:48.920
Cy rex.

1229
02:24:13.639 --> 02:24:40.479
Your body feels almost invisible, so very relaxed and peaceful,

1230
02:24:46.840 --> 02:25:54.559
so paceful. Right, let go, so paceful, so fair. And

1231
02:25:54.760 --> 02:26:02.040
you could start to notice that you feeling more relaxed,

1232
02:26:05.040 --> 02:26:14.760
even though I've not purposely focused your mind upon that

1233
02:26:16.159 --> 02:26:22.200
sense of physical comfort that is growing within you throughout

1234
02:26:22.319 --> 02:26:35.120
your body, and your mind starts to slow down, and

1235
02:26:35.280 --> 02:26:42.719
that could be almost in recognition of I guess my

1236
02:26:43.000 --> 02:26:57.719
speech not being particularly fast, and things just generally feel calmer.

1237
02:27:01.280 --> 02:27:09.239
Just by listening to my voice, you give yourself an

1238
02:27:09.319 --> 02:27:17.239
opportunity to take a break from the day, take a

1239
02:27:17.360 --> 02:27:25.000
break from your life as it is, and to give

1240
02:27:25.040 --> 02:27:33.159
yourself a rest, giving yourself permission to take some time

1241
02:27:33.280 --> 02:27:40.719
off and to allow your body to relax and allow

1242
02:27:40.920 --> 02:27:51.280
your mind to slow down, which in turn releases the

1243
02:27:51.479 --> 02:27:55.879
tension and it stresses that you had in your body.

1244
02:28:01.879 --> 02:28:05.760
It's almost as if the parts of your body just

1245
02:28:06.040 --> 02:28:17.760
open up, allowing the negativity out and at the same

1246
02:28:17.879 --> 02:28:29.159
time replacing that negativity with positive healing energy, which then

1247
02:28:29.360 --> 02:28:38.479
fills your body up and your mind to also starts

1248
02:28:38.680 --> 02:28:56.120
to appreciate those feelings of increasing confidence, an almost uplifting feeling,

1249
02:28:58.200 --> 02:29:12.200
positive healing, an energy that spreads through your body like

1250
02:29:12.319 --> 02:29:22.600
a wave of comfort. And all this comes from just

1251
02:29:26.159 --> 02:29:34.920
allowing yourself a few minutes, maybe half an hour, however

1252
02:29:35.079 --> 02:29:44.760
long you want it to be, to just rest and

1253
02:29:44.959 --> 02:29:54.920
allow your mind and your body to almost reset itself

1254
02:29:57.840 --> 02:30:13.559
to the settings of comfort and relaxation, calmness, which allows

1255
02:30:13.959 --> 02:30:26.680
more room for feelings of pleasure and happiness to move

1256
02:30:27.239 --> 02:30:36.000
around your body and into your mind, almost as if

1257
02:30:36.079 --> 02:30:45.799
your mind and your body are sinking together, almost mirroring

1258
02:30:46.680 --> 02:30:59.520
each other with that growing positivity and calmness. And it

1259
02:30:59.600 --> 02:31:07.440
feels nice, really does feel nice to know that you

1260
02:31:08.799 --> 02:31:17.280
are the one that has allowed yourself to feel more

1261
02:31:18.600 --> 02:31:25.239
comfort than to experience.

1262
02:31:26.959 --> 02:31:28.120
More of this.

1263
02:31:29.879 --> 02:31:45.040
Deep relaxation spreading throughout your body. And as I focus

1264
02:31:46.639 --> 02:31:52.360
on each part of your body, you can notice that

1265
02:31:52.600 --> 02:32:07.120
that part becomes even more relaxed. Just by focusing on it,

1266
02:32:09.639 --> 02:32:19.319
it becomes even more calm and comfortable just by focusing.

1267
02:32:23.360 --> 02:32:29.120
And as I move down your body, starting at your head,

1268
02:32:31.840 --> 02:32:37.079
the parts that you have already focused on will continue

1269
02:32:38.479 --> 02:32:45.559
to relax deeply, and those parts that have not yet

1270
02:32:45.760 --> 02:32:58.639
focused on or just automatically release any remain intention in

1271
02:32:58.799 --> 02:33:04.799
anticipation of even more comfort about to come.

1272
02:33:10.319 --> 02:33:10.520
Now.

1273
02:33:12.879 --> 02:33:19.079
I'm going to start by focusing on your forehead. Just

1274
02:33:19.280 --> 02:33:27.719
being aware of the feelings of your forehead and any

1275
02:33:27.799 --> 02:33:35.319
background sounds like mister Herbert o Pigeon can just allow

1276
02:33:35.440 --> 02:33:42.559
you to feel even more relaxed. Just means you're in

1277
02:33:42.639 --> 02:33:49.280
the moment. This isn't this isn't a sterile environment.

1278
02:33:50.639 --> 02:33:51.639
This is the world.

1279
02:33:55.079 --> 02:34:01.120
I live in the countryside, so there's lots of nature

1280
02:34:01.639 --> 02:34:12.120
sounds around. So as you focus on your forehead, just

1281
02:34:12.399 --> 02:34:20.159
notice how it becomes even more relaxed as you focus

1282
02:34:22.479 --> 02:34:26.959
only on my voice and that part of your body.

1283
02:34:32.159 --> 02:34:40.440
Moving down to your eyes, focusing on your eyes, noticing

1284
02:34:42.920 --> 02:34:52.600
how your eyelids feel so heavy yet so light at

1285
02:34:52.680 --> 02:34:59.120
the same time, and all the muscles around your eyes

1286
02:34:59.360 --> 02:35:11.159
relax and completely moving your focus down to your mouth,

1287
02:35:13.079 --> 02:35:20.639
your lips, your tongue, your teeth, you comes, the whole

1288
02:35:20.840 --> 02:35:28.399
of your mouth, relaxing, calm.

1289
02:35:29.559 --> 02:35:30.120
And loose.

1290
02:35:34.600 --> 02:35:42.399
If you focus now on your jaw, not just a

1291
02:35:42.520 --> 02:35:47.680
part of your jawney, your mouth, your chin, but all

1292
02:35:47.719 --> 02:35:52.239
the way up the size of your face to your ears,

1293
02:35:54.479 --> 02:36:06.239
the hole of your jaw, feeding more relaxed.

1294
02:36:09.639 --> 02:36:10.360
And calm.

1295
02:36:18.600 --> 02:36:27.639
Focusing on your neck, the front of your neck, and

1296
02:36:27.760 --> 02:36:40.760
your throat relaxing and loose and calm. The sides of

1297
02:36:40.879 --> 02:36:45.840
your neck, the right and the left side of your

1298
02:36:45.959 --> 02:37:04.760
neck relax and lace and calm. And now the back

1299
02:37:04.879 --> 02:37:11.559
of your neck. Focusing on the back of your neck,

1300
02:37:17.559 --> 02:37:22.719
letting go of any tension that may have been there before,

1301
02:37:24.559 --> 02:37:38.639
and enjoying that sense of increasing comfort and release that

1302
02:37:38.879 --> 02:37:49.280
you can experience in the back of your neck. Moving

1303
02:37:49.520 --> 02:37:56.079
down your back and moving either side of your spine

1304
02:37:57.399 --> 02:37:59.319
right from the top of your back.

1305
02:38:01.079 --> 02:38:02.280
All the way.

1306
02:38:02.319 --> 02:38:15.000
Down to the bottom of your back down to your

1307
02:38:15.079 --> 02:38:25.639
lower back. As you move up and down your spine,

1308
02:38:27.760 --> 02:38:32.200
you can feel the muscles either side of your spine

1309
02:38:34.399 --> 02:38:49.000
relaxing even more, and as those muscles relax that sense

1310
02:38:49.079 --> 02:38:59.559
of comfort starts to spread outwards from your spine into

1311
02:38:59.719 --> 02:39:06.360
both sides of your back. The top of your back,

1312
02:39:07.239 --> 02:39:13.479
the middle and your lower back. And as you scan

1313
02:39:15.200 --> 02:39:23.040
gently and slowly up and down your back, there's the

1314
02:39:23.159 --> 02:39:29.040
muscles in the top of your back relax and become looser.

1315
02:39:33.360 --> 02:39:39.360
The muscles in the middle of your back also seem

1316
02:39:39.479 --> 02:39:49.000
to just almost divide from each other, separating and almost melting,

1317
02:39:54.760 --> 02:40:01.079
and in your lower back seems to be an extra

1318
02:40:01.319 --> 02:40:17.440
special feeling of comfort. The spreads into your hips. Sit

1319
02:40:17.559 --> 02:40:25.639
down your lower back, into your hips, into the area

1320
02:40:25.760 --> 02:40:34.280
where your cosicks are, and into your buttocks, and all

1321
02:40:34.319 --> 02:40:43.559
those muscles that spread bring your lower back into your

1322
02:40:43.719 --> 02:40:56.920
hip area, start to melt, start to reading. Let go,

1323
02:41:03.639 --> 02:41:10.360
and you nowhere about to focus on your shoulders. Your

1324
02:41:10.600 --> 02:41:17.200
back and your spine will continue un til let go.

1325
02:41:20.280 --> 02:41:35.879
Continue to relax so calmly, and as you focus on

1326
02:41:36.040 --> 02:41:48.920
your shoulders, you may notice they're already feeling really loose.

1327
02:41:53.799 --> 02:41:55.440
They're already.

1328
02:41:57.840 --> 02:42:04.440
Feeding calm.

1329
02:42:10.479 --> 02:42:11.719
And fein.

1330
02:42:15.760 --> 02:42:24.079
Those muscles. Then move from your neck into your shoulders.

1331
02:42:30.639 --> 02:42:42.159
Feel so soft and gentle, so smooth.

1332
02:42:47.799 --> 02:42:48.600
And calm.

1333
02:43:00.280 --> 02:43:13.079
The feeling in your shoulders seems to spread deep into

1334
02:43:13.159 --> 02:43:23.559
your shoulders, a sense of relaxation, not just traveling deeply

1335
02:43:23.959 --> 02:43:40.959
into your muscles, but also relaxing the bones and moving

1336
02:43:41.079 --> 02:43:49.319
all a way to underneath your arms, relaxing the whole

1337
02:43:49.520 --> 02:43:55.239
area between the tops of your shoulders and underneath your arms.

1338
02:43:59.280 --> 02:44:05.920
Healing. You feel so.

1339
02:44:07.879 --> 02:44:19.840
Relaxed and comfortable in your shoulders, which sense that's.

1340
02:44:21.600 --> 02:44:23.600
Deep healing.

1341
02:44:26.600 --> 02:44:44.079
Message into your arms. You may feel almost as if

1342
02:44:44.200 --> 02:44:50.680
your arms are not even there because they're so relaxed,

1343
02:44:53.920 --> 02:45:09.639
so deeply relaxed, so so calm.

1344
02:45:24.840 --> 02:45:31.799
So this.

1345
02:45:39.360 --> 02:45:50.479
The feelings spreading all the way down your arms to elbows,

1346
02:45:54.479 --> 02:46:10.719
including your elbows, circumfort spreads.

1347
02:46:15.000 --> 02:46:15.719
Or away.

1348
02:46:18.120 --> 02:46:37.040
Into rests, your forearments an your wrists so heavy, yet

1349
02:46:37.280 --> 02:47:18.159
at the same time sunlight and gentle frey sick.

1350
02:47:20.559 --> 02:47:21.520
Now on.

1351
02:47:24.239 --> 02:47:48.319
Your hands, my hands.

1352
02:47:54.159 --> 02:47:56.959
So peaceful.

1353
02:47:58.040 --> 02:47:59.319
In your hands.

1354
02:48:17.680 --> 02:48:18.799
With the sense of.

1355
02:48:22.319 --> 02:48:37.000
Real pace, just seems.

1356
02:48:36.680 --> 02:49:01.840
To feel so familiar. On your hands, relax deeply els

1357
02:49:19.399 --> 02:50:28.239
I things things you think, It tips.

1358
02:50:56.440 --> 02:50:56.959
My think.

1359
02:50:57.399 --> 02:51:30.399
Attention to your body so counsible man new focus, till

1360
02:51:30.600 --> 02:53:46.000
legs like musuls in your fas names I relaxed, cough muscles,

1361
02:53:47.680 --> 02:55:56.239
just shaves, COMPOSI see then you saint.

1362
02:56:02.959 --> 02:57:02.719
Serve peaceful, sircom say peaceful, sircom serve peaceful sycom so

1363
02:57:04.719 --> 02:57:06.399
peace fall.

1364
02:57:14.760 --> 02:57:16.600
RelA same.

1365
02:57:21.639 --> 02:57:23.399
Peace, fall.

1366
02:57:26.719 --> 02:57:39.440
S, come love, that deep relaxation.

1367
02:57:40.040 --> 02:57:57.479
To spread your chest storm. So RelA, lets me go.

1368
02:58:01.600 --> 02:58:02.280
Everything.

1369
02:58:13.520 --> 02:58:19.520
So I'm gonna start counting down now from twenty down

1370
02:58:19.600 --> 02:58:27.680
to one. You can imagine in a way it's like

1371
02:58:28.520 --> 02:58:34.959
just walking down some steps and each step or twenty steps,

1372
02:58:35.040 --> 02:58:44.159
and each step represents a level of comfort. Each step

1373
02:58:44.680 --> 02:59:00.280
represents a deepening of that comfort, and the furvies you

1374
02:59:00.399 --> 02:59:06.399
walk down those steps, the deeper more relaxed you feel.

1375
02:59:13.120 --> 03:01:01.719
So starting with number twenty twenty nineteen, eighteen, seventeen.

1376
03:01:47.239 --> 03:03:04.360
Sixteen US concuss fixtree.

1377
03:03:46.520 --> 03:06:12.840
Four four s too wellhhhhhhhh.

1378
03:07:16.120 --> 03:07:43.040
Using the.

1379
03:07:45.280 --> 03:10:55.840
US nohhhhhhhhh.

1380
03:10:12.399 --> 03:11:12.399
Eight s.

1381
03:12:49.920 --> 03:13:18.399
Six D.

1382
03:13:21.479 --> 03:13:48.079
The D.

1383
03:14:05.200 --> 03:15:35.159
Five four.

1384
03:16:08.479 --> 03:19:03.159
Hustling one.

1385
03:19:57.799 --> 03:20:10.440
As you focus on your eyes, We're gonna count down

1386
03:20:10.840 --> 03:20:22.000
from ten down to one, focusing just on your eyes,

1387
03:20:25.760 --> 03:20:34.239
your eyelids, the muscles around your eyes, your eye waves themselves,

1388
03:20:35.760 --> 03:20:52.799
our whole area that makes up your eye. And as

1389
03:20:52.879 --> 03:21:01.399
we count down from ten down to one, whilst focusing

1390
03:21:01.680 --> 03:21:16.399
on your eyes, you will become twice is relaxed with

1391
03:21:16.799 --> 03:21:29.760
each number counting down that you may find the all

1392
03:21:29.879 --> 03:21:36.040
you want to do is just drift off to sleep.

1393
03:21:39.000 --> 03:21:45.600
And if that's what you want, then just allow yourself

1394
03:21:45.719 --> 03:22:00.559
to do that. Now, focusing on your eyes. Got to

1395
03:22:00.680 --> 03:22:19.520
begin counting down from ten down to one right now, ten.

1396
03:22:45.520 --> 03:28:40.479
Nine eight, seven, four.

1397
03:28:42.639 --> 03:31:03.840
Three the last.

1398
03:31:16.719 --> 03:31:38.079
One. So counted down from ten to one, ten nine

1399
03:31:39.760 --> 03:31:57.200
eight seven six five four three two.

1400
03:31:59.719 --> 03:31:59.879
One.

1401
03:32:06.959 --> 03:32:09.840
And maybe that was a bit too quick in order

1402
03:32:09.920 --> 03:32:13.840
to relax. Maybe it's a bit too fast for you

1403
03:32:14.159 --> 03:32:23.879
to notice the calming of your body, maybe even a

1404
03:32:23.920 --> 03:32:27.760
little bit of pressure there, like you're counting down from

1405
03:32:27.840 --> 03:32:30.520
ten to one. Would you expect me to do man,

1406
03:32:31.440 --> 03:32:34.920
expect me to just to go with floppy just because

1407
03:32:34.959 --> 03:32:44.120
you're counting down. You could try it again, but this

1408
03:32:44.360 --> 03:32:50.000
time I'll go a bit slower this time. Did you

1409
03:32:50.239 --> 03:32:55.479
focus on the whole of your body before we focus

1410
03:32:55.600 --> 03:33:04.239
on your legs? Just notice how your body does start

1411
03:33:06.079 --> 03:33:17.479
to feel more relaxed with every number that I count

1412
03:33:17.559 --> 03:34:15.959
down ten nine eight seven, six, five four three.

1413
03:34:50.319 --> 03:34:50.559
One.

1414
03:35:01.920 --> 03:35:07.639
And just notice how how you feel generally, how your

1415
03:35:07.680 --> 03:35:22.520
body feels. It's not necessarily even about counting down from

1416
03:35:22.600 --> 03:35:30.280
ten to one. It's that space that you have, that

1417
03:35:32.879 --> 03:35:54.079
space between being active physically or mentally, just sitting or

1418
03:35:54.239 --> 03:35:59.920
lying down, just being there, not doing anything, not saying anything,

1419
03:36:00.239 --> 03:36:06.799
not needing to think about anything. So it opens up

1420
03:36:06.840 --> 03:36:11.280
a space, you know, a bit of a space, a gap.

1421
03:36:17.520 --> 03:36:21.040
And the more I came down from ten to one,

1422
03:36:22.239 --> 03:36:30.319
the bigger that gap becomes. So there's that gap of calmness,

1423
03:36:31.719 --> 03:36:47.399
of comfort, relaxation. It's a nice feeling, and it moves

1424
03:36:48.959 --> 03:36:56.600
those stresses or discomforts physically or emotionally moves.

1425
03:36:58.520 --> 03:36:58.879
Away.

1426
03:37:05.639 --> 03:37:06.600
Allows you.

1427
03:37:09.319 --> 03:37:09.840
To just.

1428
03:37:12.840 --> 03:37:19.159
Slow down, someone to count a game from ten down

1429
03:37:19.200 --> 03:37:29.200
to one and notice that gap widening, the gap. And

1430
03:37:29.319 --> 03:37:34.319
as it widens, it's almost like the stress and attention

1431
03:37:35.159 --> 03:37:54.239
falls into the gap and gives you that distance, that space.

1432
03:37:56.639 --> 03:38:02.079
Now ten.

1433
03:38:06.479 --> 03:38:33.440
Nine, eight, seven, six.

1434
03:38:45.840 --> 03:38:57.760
Five, four.

1435
03:39:15.879 --> 03:40:07.399
Three. Now, how does your body feel.

1436
03:40:09.280 --> 03:40:09.479
Now?

1437
03:40:22.200 --> 03:40:34.799
Can you notice that? Do you feeling calmer, the feeling

1438
03:40:37.159 --> 03:41:04.559
more relaxed as we now focus on your legs, just

1439
03:41:04.760 --> 03:41:26.120
your legs. We're just gonna start with focusing on your thighs.

1440
03:41:40.920 --> 03:41:44.920
Of course, it's not the most exciting thing to be

1441
03:41:45.040 --> 03:41:52.239
doing because I'm sure, like most of your body is

1442
03:41:52.360 --> 03:42:04.479
not a lot going on right now. Just focusing on

1443
03:42:04.600 --> 03:42:10.000
the whole of your thighs, the tops of your thighs,

1444
03:42:10.799 --> 03:42:16.120
the sides of your thighs, the bottoms of your thighs,

1445
03:42:17.639 --> 03:42:23.079
your outer thighs, and your inner thighs basically the whole

1446
03:42:23.159 --> 03:42:30.639
of your thigh that leads into your hip and it

1447
03:42:30.799 --> 03:42:41.479
goes down to your knee joints. Now, this is a

1448
03:42:41.600 --> 03:42:50.000
big area. It's a very heavy area. It's very strong,

1449
03:42:51.239 --> 03:42:56.239
probably the strongest muscles in your body or in your thighs.

1450
03:43:06.399 --> 03:43:14.120
But I don't think we perhaps give enough attention to

1451
03:43:14.360 --> 03:43:28.079
our thighs. Perhaps we don't acknowledge how important our thighs

1452
03:43:28.319 --> 03:43:48.079
are to our lives, how much they actually do for

1453
03:43:48.280 --> 03:44:02.000
us all through our lives. And it may seem to

1454
03:44:02.079 --> 03:44:07.239
sound really weird, but I think that all of our

1455
03:44:07.319 --> 03:44:18.159
body parts, especially our thighs, needs some TLC, a bit

1456
03:44:18.200 --> 03:44:35.000
of love shown, a bit of acknowledgement, thank you, gratitude

1457
03:44:37.959 --> 03:44:46.959
for our thighs do for us. And I know this

1458
03:44:47.239 --> 03:44:53.159
may sound a bit strange. Maybe you think, why am

1459
03:44:53.239 --> 03:44:56.719
I sure? How should be out in the garden hugging

1460
03:44:56.799 --> 03:45:04.680
a tree or something. Well, it's hard to set a

1461
03:45:04.760 --> 03:45:08.440
microphone up on a tree. That's why I'm doing this indoors.

1462
03:45:08.520 --> 03:45:12.280
Otherwise I wouldn't be outside in a tree. I can't

1463
03:45:12.319 --> 03:45:21.120
see the television from the tree. If you move down

1464
03:45:21.159 --> 03:45:30.879
to your knees, gain such an important part and I

1465
03:45:31.000 --> 03:45:37.840
think we don't necessarily I'll speak for myself here. I

1466
03:45:37.920 --> 03:45:43.040
don't necessarily appreciate all that my needs do for me

1467
03:45:44.319 --> 03:45:49.479
until I have a problem with my knee. It's occasionally,

1468
03:45:49.559 --> 03:45:54.520
if I ever, maybe i'll bash it, or it's aching

1469
03:45:54.680 --> 03:46:01.079
for some reason. It's then that I realize how much

1470
03:46:01.239 --> 03:46:04.840
it does. You know, the benefit of being able to

1471
03:46:05.799 --> 03:46:15.000
use my legs without any kind of physical discomfort is

1472
03:46:15.840 --> 03:46:24.559
a beautiful thing that's possibly not appreciated until it's temporarily removed.

1473
03:46:25.680 --> 03:46:32.680
You know that's comfort. But as you focus on your knees,

1474
03:46:34.840 --> 03:46:40.479
regardless of how your knees feel, you can have that

1475
03:46:40.760 --> 03:46:46.920
sense of gratitude and love to your needs for all

1476
03:46:47.040 --> 03:46:59.239
that they do for you, and you can still have

1477
03:46:59.399 --> 03:47:03.559
that attention and on your thighs. Maybe notice how your

1478
03:47:03.680 --> 03:47:12.680
thighs feel. Maybe you have noticed that they are relaxing

1479
03:47:15.280 --> 03:47:28.360
more deeply as you focus now on the bottoms of

1480
03:47:28.440 --> 03:47:33.280
your legs, your shins and your calf muscles. The bones

1481
03:47:34.360 --> 03:47:40.920
between your knees and your feet incorporate, and of course

1482
03:47:41.040 --> 03:47:52.799
your ankles so important. You know, anyone that's had even

1483
03:47:52.840 --> 03:47:58.000
there like the slightest sprain of an ankle, knows how

1484
03:47:59.600 --> 03:48:09.959
how much we take our ankles for granted, and it's

1485
03:48:10.040 --> 03:48:12.120
kind of strange in a way when you think that.

1486
03:48:14.680 --> 03:48:18.639
You know, logically, our wrists are a lot thinner than

1487
03:48:18.760 --> 03:48:22.879
the rest of our arms, which is okay, it doesn't

1488
03:48:23.399 --> 03:48:26.440
I can't see any problem with that because we're just

1489
03:48:26.559 --> 03:48:34.239
picking stuff up by our ankles so much thinner than

1490
03:48:34.280 --> 03:48:43.360
the rest of our legs. And from a physics perspective

1491
03:48:44.600 --> 03:48:48.799
or logical even it doesn't really make sense that all

1492
03:48:48.920 --> 03:48:57.639
this weight would ultimately be resting on your ankles then

1493
03:48:57.760 --> 03:49:10.879
leading to your feet, that thin area, thin bone. Yeah,

1494
03:49:10.959 --> 03:49:16.680
it does so much great work. Supports us, supports our

1495
03:49:16.760 --> 03:49:28.799
body for a lifetime, helps us to balance, helps.

1496
03:49:28.559 --> 03:49:28.879
You to.

1497
03:49:32.840 --> 03:49:42.079
Get around and be mobile. And there's the calf muscles.

1498
03:49:42.159 --> 03:49:49.760
Of course, when I was younger, I couldn't see the

1499
03:49:49.840 --> 03:49:54.879
point in calf muscles. Didn't seem to do anything. Okay,

1500
03:49:56.000 --> 03:49:59.559
if I walked around on tiptoes, then my calf muscles

1501
03:49:59.600 --> 03:50:03.120
get some work. But of course that's not true. The

1502
03:50:03.239 --> 03:50:07.639
calf muscles are being used whenever we use the legs,

1503
03:50:13.239 --> 03:50:25.840
and your shins there to protect your lower legs, shaped

1504
03:50:25.920 --> 03:50:30.600
in a way almost as a protector for the bone,

1505
03:50:38.200 --> 03:50:50.120
leading of course to your ankles. And your feet. But

1506
03:50:50.200 --> 03:50:52.120
we're not going to focus on your feet. We're just

1507
03:50:52.200 --> 03:50:58.319
going to focus on the legs. And I realize, and

1508
03:50:58.479 --> 03:51:02.479
now that I've mentioned your feet, you'll probably focus on

1509
03:51:02.639 --> 03:51:05.840
them anyway, So maybe I should focus on your feet

1510
03:51:05.879 --> 03:51:12.000
a little bit. You can have them in your awareness

1511
03:51:14.159 --> 03:51:17.879
the same as you have your thighs in your awareness.

1512
03:51:18.719 --> 03:51:22.600
Even though we haven't been focusing on your thighs a

1513
03:51:22.760 --> 03:51:33.799
few minutes, let me focusing on your ankles. There's still

1514
03:51:33.879 --> 03:51:48.959
that sensation of comfort in your thighs, and there's that

1515
03:51:49.440 --> 03:51:59.479
movement of energy because the thighs hold lots of different sensations.

1516
03:52:00.920 --> 03:52:05.799
Of course, there's the muscles, the big straw muscles that

1517
03:52:05.920 --> 03:52:18.760
we have in our thighs. But the skin on the

1518
03:52:18.920 --> 03:52:24.360
outside of the thighs, as in the outside of all

1519
03:52:24.479 --> 03:52:33.280
of our body, can be very sensitive, sensitive to the touch,

1520
03:52:36.079 --> 03:52:49.399
sensitive to temperature, and inside your thighs the bones, there's

1521
03:52:50.440 --> 03:52:55.239
the muscle, there's the blood, vessels, the ar trees to

1522
03:52:55.440 --> 03:53:04.040
all this stuff that's inside your thighs. I guess sometimes

1523
03:53:04.920 --> 03:53:07.399
it'd be nice if you could actually put your fingers

1524
03:53:08.680 --> 03:53:14.680
inside your thighs and a message, so you can message

1525
03:53:14.760 --> 03:53:17.879
on the outside, of course, but to be able to

1526
03:53:17.959 --> 03:53:21.120
get deep into the muscles and to be able to

1527
03:53:21.280 --> 03:53:27.559
just message inside your thighs, message in the bones of

1528
03:53:27.680 --> 03:53:38.959
your leg massage in all the veins, just gently healing

1529
03:53:39.600 --> 03:53:48.719
your thighs, and you can move down message and inside

1530
03:53:48.760 --> 03:53:55.719
your knees. Just message in those bones, but with healing fingertips,

1531
03:53:57.159 --> 03:54:03.479
spreading that healing energy even into the joints on your knees.

1532
03:54:08.920 --> 03:54:12.600
Of course, there's the back of your your need and

1533
03:54:12.719 --> 03:54:18.719
the inside crease where your need is. It's a very

1534
03:54:18.920 --> 03:54:24.799
sensitive area. Very it feels very nice when you stroke it.

1535
03:54:26.200 --> 03:54:29.559
That might be because it's an area that's not really

1536
03:54:29.760 --> 03:54:36.239
touched very often. It's almost like a hidden part, that

1537
03:54:36.559 --> 03:54:43.479
crease in your legs. It's almost like a part that

1538
03:54:45.280 --> 03:54:56.559
has a sensitivity which is a little bit different. Of course,

1539
03:54:56.600 --> 03:55:07.079
it's protected by your legs. So you can imagine putting

1540
03:55:08.000 --> 03:55:17.799
your fingers into that crease in your legs. Fold in

1541
03:55:17.920 --> 03:55:21.879
between your legs. You can just message with your fingertips.

1542
03:55:23.079 --> 03:55:29.280
Imagine your fingertips going inside, message in the muscle or

1543
03:55:29.360 --> 03:55:38.719
tissue you can cause field the bones of your knees,

1544
03:55:40.239 --> 03:55:50.680
heading through your fingertips, and then as you go down

1545
03:55:53.559 --> 03:55:56.319
to your calf muscles and that's the part I'd like

1546
03:55:56.440 --> 03:56:01.120
to be able to really put my fingertips steep inside

1547
03:56:01.879 --> 03:56:10.840
my calf muscles, massage in every single tissue of that muscle,

1548
03:56:12.440 --> 03:56:22.360
healing every part, and then doing the same for my shins,

1549
03:56:25.520 --> 03:56:33.719
massage in generally stroking the bones, generally stroking them, healing

1550
03:56:33.959 --> 03:56:38.040
in a loving way, because they deserve to be treated.

1551
03:56:41.079 --> 03:56:45.239
There's the precious bones that they are, because our legs

1552
03:56:45.280 --> 03:56:48.639
are so precious as in all the other parts of

1553
03:56:48.719 --> 03:56:56.879
our body, the more precious of any chool on the planet.

1554
03:57:05.440 --> 03:57:13.440
When you start to think about your legs in this way,

1555
03:57:18.000 --> 03:57:24.680
it can change your perspective. It might sound a bit

1556
03:57:27.760 --> 03:57:32.040
a bit silly to start with the idea of having

1557
03:57:32.959 --> 03:57:42.959
love for your legs, showing appreciation for your thighs, wanting

1558
03:57:43.079 --> 03:57:47.000
to be able to put your hands in your thighs,

1559
03:57:49.200 --> 03:57:55.559
massage the muscles and the bones, and to get your

1560
03:57:55.680 --> 03:58:03.719
fingers deep in there, releasing all at tension, just to

1561
03:58:03.920 --> 03:58:13.360
show how much you care about your legs, how much

1562
03:58:13.399 --> 03:58:19.079
you care for what your legs do for you regularly.

1563
03:58:21.479 --> 03:58:31.680
Your kneeds, your calves, your ankles, the strength of your ankles,

1564
03:58:34.600 --> 03:58:39.319
considering how thin they are compared to the rest of

1565
03:58:39.399 --> 03:58:49.159
your legs. Especially your thighs. Yeah, they're so strong, so flexible,

1566
03:58:52.920 --> 03:59:05.760
absolutely amazing things. Your ankles are truly a gift because

1567
03:59:05.799 --> 03:59:14.559
of what they do for you, supporting all that weight.

1568
03:59:16.559 --> 03:59:20.959
Regardless of how what weight you are, even if you

1569
03:59:21.079 --> 03:59:25.799
only eat ate stone, there's still a lot of weight

1570
03:59:26.040 --> 03:59:32.719
for these little ankles. How am a lot heavier than

1571
03:59:32.760 --> 03:59:42.719
eight stone? Double dock get My ankles support my body

1572
03:59:43.520 --> 03:59:50.079
all the time, or they do give off a sigh

1573
03:59:50.120 --> 03:59:55.280
of relief when I sit down as I've had my

1574
03:59:55.360 --> 04:00:04.719
whole legs th a fee or so go. My toes

1575
04:00:04.799 --> 04:00:34.760
clap so happy. Your legs really are amazing. And I

1576
04:00:34.920 --> 04:00:38.840
know there talking about talking about your legs is probably

1577
04:00:41.319 --> 04:00:45.120
possibly among the most the most boring things I've ever

1578
04:00:45.799 --> 04:00:54.120
heard anyone say. Possibly you're boring or not. Everything I

1579
04:00:54.239 --> 04:01:10.159
said is true. Your legs are amazing. Your legs deserve

1580
04:01:11.200 --> 04:01:20.000
not just respect, They deserve to relax.

1581
04:01:21.440 --> 04:01:21.799
Deeply.

1582
04:01:29.079 --> 04:01:32.440
They deserve to take some time out of the day

1583
04:01:34.639 --> 04:02:11.520
to just lecker completely. Your legs really can relax because

1584
04:02:11.559 --> 04:02:15.520
the legs are so such a most you know, very

1585
04:02:15.559 --> 04:02:21.280
important part of your body. When you relax your legs,

1586
04:02:21.399 --> 04:02:28.600
the rest of your body also naturally follows in that

1587
04:02:32.360 --> 04:02:43.200
journey of comfort, like I feel it in my hips.

1588
04:02:44.600 --> 04:02:51.719
My hips feel really loose, and also my lower back

1589
04:02:51.760 --> 04:02:58.360
as well. My lower back really feels it feels stretched,

1590
04:02:59.479 --> 04:03:02.520
even though I'm just sitting in a chair and there's

1591
04:03:02.639 --> 04:03:07.879
no stretching as far as I'm aware that I'm doing.

1592
04:03:08.920 --> 04:03:11.559
It's almost as if the muscles are just relaxed so

1593
04:03:11.799 --> 04:03:17.680
much that there is a natural stretch as the tension

1594
04:03:18.600 --> 04:03:39.840
has reduced a lot. And I'm now going to count

1595
04:03:39.920 --> 04:03:47.799
down from ten down to one and you can continue

1596
04:03:49.680 --> 04:03:53.159
to feel wonderfully relaxed.

1597
04:03:56.959 --> 04:04:01.280
Ten nine.

1598
04:04:04.159 --> 04:04:16.200
Eight seven six, five.

1599
04:04:20.559 --> 04:04:24.680
Four three.

1600
04:04:28.520 --> 04:04:49.280
Two one relax. So I'm just going to count down

1601
04:04:51.120 --> 04:04:55.600
five down to one, and as a countdown, if you

1602
04:04:55.760 --> 04:05:02.600
just focus on the numbers, just the numbers counting down,

1603
04:05:03.680 --> 04:05:12.799
and notice how you feel in this moment as you

1604
04:05:12.959 --> 04:05:20.479
hear the numbers counting down, knowing that those numbers counting

1605
04:05:20.600 --> 04:05:30.719
down represent you feeling calmer, not just in your body,

1606
04:05:30.879 --> 04:05:39.239
but also relaxing your mind. Just notice how you feel.

1607
04:05:40.120 --> 04:05:46.040
There's nothing to do, there's nothing to say, there's nothing

1608
04:05:46.200 --> 04:06:23.159
to think about. Starting with number five, four three two.

1609
04:06:29.000 --> 04:06:29.239
One.

1610
04:06:38.680 --> 04:06:45.120
Now, as you notice the gradual.

1611
04:06:47.360 --> 04:06:47.920
Letting go.

1612
04:06:50.280 --> 04:06:57.200
With the tension in your body, you may also begin

1613
04:06:57.520 --> 04:07:03.479
to notice and be aware of how your mind is

1614
04:07:04.600 --> 04:07:12.399
starting to slow down. This is just a natural thing

1615
04:07:12.920 --> 04:07:20.280
that happens. It's not really a special procedure. It's just

1616
04:07:20.479 --> 04:07:26.680
natural because as your body relaxes, your mind also starts

1617
04:07:26.760 --> 04:07:31.440
to relax, and the more your mind relaxes, the more

1618
04:07:31.479 --> 04:07:36.719
your body relaxes. It's just a continuous circle of relaxation.

1619
04:07:42.799 --> 04:07:51.319
And there's that calmness that comes from relative quietness. You know,

1620
04:07:51.440 --> 04:07:57.040
even even if there's background sounds either your side or mind,

1621
04:07:58.760 --> 04:08:04.680
it's still and to be quite calm. You know, you

1622
04:08:04.760 --> 04:08:09.959
haven't got the television on, there's no music in the background,

1623
04:08:10.079 --> 04:08:12.719
unless you're listening to the recorded with music. Of course,

1624
04:08:17.559 --> 04:08:19.760
you're very likely not going to be sitting in a

1625
04:08:19.840 --> 04:08:23.000
room with other people. Of course you might be, but

1626
04:08:24.280 --> 04:08:27.559
generally it's more ideal if you can do this on

1627
04:08:27.680 --> 04:08:39.000
your own, so no distractions, and when you stop thinking

1628
04:08:39.040 --> 04:08:56.239
about stuff, relaxation automatically rises. A sense of comfort starts

1629
04:08:56.280 --> 04:09:05.040
to grow, and without trying to build it up into

1630
04:09:05.159 --> 04:09:17.280
something fantastical or something magical, this is just a natural process,

1631
04:09:19.600 --> 04:09:30.280
something that's easy to accomplish. In fact, it's almost you know,

1632
04:09:30.440 --> 04:09:37.280
the sense of relaxing completely happens really when you put

1633
04:09:37.479 --> 04:09:41.319
no effort into it. It's not something that you can

1634
04:09:41.440 --> 04:09:53.040
really force. It's something that happens naturally. And part of

1635
04:09:53.479 --> 04:10:03.680
the process of this recording and others is simply two

1636
04:10:05.280 --> 04:10:12.680
allow you to take advantage of this space.

1637
04:10:14.879 --> 04:10:19.159
This time, to just.

1638
04:10:23.319 --> 04:10:30.840
Let go, to just be here, to be in tune

1639
04:10:34.559 --> 04:10:46.639
with how you feel, yet with the intention of wanting

1640
04:10:46.920 --> 04:10:59.000
to relax deeply and maybe even to fall asleep, depending

1641
04:10:59.239 --> 04:11:05.479
on what it is that you wish for yourself in

1642
04:11:05.639 --> 04:11:21.760
this moment. As we know, relaxing is the majority of

1643
04:11:21.879 --> 04:11:26.479
the process of falling asleep. The actual falling asleep part

1644
04:11:26.719 --> 04:11:34.920
is the tiny bit at the end. The deeper relaxed

1645
04:11:35.280 --> 04:11:57.040
you become, the easier you find yourself drifting. You can

1646
04:11:57.120 --> 04:12:05.559
also if you choose stay focused on my voice and

1647
04:12:07.280 --> 04:12:37.440
really enjoy the process gradually relaxing each muscle in your

1648
04:12:37.520 --> 04:13:12.040
body effortlessly and just observing the sensation of letting go completely.

1649
04:13:18.079 --> 04:13:22.120
This time, I'm gonna count from six down to one.

1650
04:13:27.280 --> 04:13:36.799
You can notice your mind calming down more with each

1651
04:13:37.399 --> 04:13:51.319
number that you hear me say, naturally, feeling calm and slow,

1652
04:13:55.760 --> 04:14:29.440
be peaceful, six, five.

1653
04:14:49.280 --> 04:16:57.040
Four, three, being aware how you mind to slow.

1654
04:16:58.879 --> 04:17:25.280
Right down, sinking deeply into relaxation. And as you focus

1655
04:17:25.440 --> 04:17:35.120
on your mind, may notice that there are some thoughts

1656
04:17:35.840 --> 04:17:44.719
still there, maybe some stubborn thoughts that for some reason

1657
04:17:47.799 --> 04:17:57.600
perhaps need your attention. So what you can do is

1658
04:18:03.159 --> 04:18:15.639
send love to those thoughts. Sprinkle those thoughts with love

1659
04:18:17.399 --> 04:18:21.600
my door petals from a flower, Just sprinkle it over them,

1660
04:18:23.079 --> 04:18:31.520
petals feel good love towards those thoughts. To let those thoughts, mom,

1661
04:18:33.680 --> 04:18:39.120
You're not abandon in them. You just need them. You

1662
04:18:39.280 --> 04:18:50.760
require them to just calm down, slow down, quiet down

1663
04:18:54.719 --> 04:19:06.479
for now. So as you focus on those remaining thoughts

1664
04:19:07.719 --> 04:19:11.799
as a countdown, this time from seven down to one.

1665
04:19:13.360 --> 04:19:27.440
With each number, just imagine sprinkling those flower petals of love, kindness,

1666
04:19:29.040 --> 04:19:40.879
gratitude over those thoughts, which will allow them to just

1667
04:19:42.360 --> 04:19:57.319
not away and relax deeply. Of every number, those thoughts

1668
04:19:57.440 --> 04:19:58.879
will become more.

1669
04:20:09.719 --> 04:20:10.559
Start him.

1670
04:20:13.840 --> 04:22:41.600
If not the seven, six, four, three, Lets you know,

1671
04:22:46.040 --> 04:23:07.280
notice how relaxed your feeling in your body. We got

1672
04:23:07.360 --> 04:23:21.040
to focus on your hands, because the more relaxed your

1673
04:23:21.239 --> 04:23:28.000
hands are, the more relaxed your body and mind. Do

1674
04:23:45.200 --> 04:23:55.319
you focus on your hands and your fingers, There's nothing

1675
04:23:55.879 --> 04:24:00.680
needed to be done, there's no clinching of this song,

1676
04:24:01.680 --> 04:24:11.959
dance in the fingers or anything like that. It's just

1677
04:24:12.440 --> 04:24:25.280
not to say focusing on your hands, not to see

1678
04:24:25.600 --> 04:24:46.959
arly feel because the but asks do your hands feel

1679
04:24:50.440 --> 04:24:51.719
my calm on your.

1680
04:24:51.799 --> 04:24:53.399
Mind feels.

1681
04:24:58.799 --> 04:25:27.440
Confidence throughout your body. Gee may have already noticed you

1682
04:25:32.000 --> 04:26:03.399
mind is starting drest. Like said, just on your hands

1683
04:26:04.639 --> 04:26:22.600
and fingers, allowing and cheap experience a real deepening of

1684
04:26:22.799 --> 04:26:38.680
that relaxation in your hands and fingers, a more relaxed

1685
04:26:43.799 --> 04:27:04.799
with each number whom eights down to one, almost feel

1686
04:27:05.280 --> 04:27:15.959
that healing relaxing energy spread it into your hands and fingers,

1687
04:27:19.280 --> 04:27:43.639
becoming relaxing with each number you hear going down eight

1688
04:27:44.479 --> 04:30:41.440
down to one, drifting, drifting again, spots to police seven, three,

1689
04:32:01.239 --> 04:32:10.520
just being here now, nothing to think about, nothing to do,

1690
04:32:12.159 --> 04:32:26.399
nothing to say, and everything just feels calm. This is

1691
04:32:27.520 --> 04:32:34.280
your natural state of being. This is how you just

1692
04:32:35.399 --> 04:32:44.399
normally feel when you take away that other stuff that

1693
04:32:44.559 --> 04:32:49.280
we add. I think like stress and way we're here,

1694
04:32:52.319 --> 04:33:07.080
I don't think anxiety ten giply thinking about so we

1695
04:33:07.279 --> 04:33:11.200
take that away. This is what we did, what we

1696
04:33:11.319 --> 04:33:25.159
do now you left with a real sense of peasons

1697
04:33:28.720 --> 04:33:36.799
which comes to you very goodly because as please, it's

1698
04:33:37.080 --> 04:33:50.680
just a feeling, a feeling of comfort, most as if

1699
04:33:50.759 --> 04:33:56.759
you got inside yourself, you've found a special place where

1700
04:33:59.200 --> 04:34:11.360
everything is peaceful, place sweep in the film, relaxed in

1701
04:34:11.560 --> 04:34:25.599
your natural sense of confident place. We be here. We

1702
04:34:26.000 --> 04:34:33.439
can accept yourself and you are the place where you

1703
04:34:33.560 --> 04:34:44.639
are trying to release anybody else in place. Week can

1704
04:34:46.360 --> 04:34:55.080
actually not just love yourself in some ways more importantly,

1705
04:34:55.720 --> 04:35:12.119
you can like yourself, appreciate who do you want, a

1706
04:35:12.439 --> 04:35:27.200
sense of gratitude. See the air around that's also a

1707
04:35:27.360 --> 04:35:37.479
place where you can actually feel the heaving energy soaking

1708
04:35:37.840 --> 04:35:56.240
into your body. Heaving energy soaking into your body, heaving

1709
04:35:56.479 --> 04:36:07.439
energy spreads through your vein, traveling to each every single

1710
04:36:07.799 --> 04:36:19.000
part of your body. You start to realize that actually

1711
04:36:19.799 --> 04:36:25.880
a healing energy. It's not just intered into your brain,

1712
04:36:28.720 --> 04:36:38.200
it's become a part of your brain. The spinal fluid

1713
04:36:40.880 --> 04:36:51.439
is now needs to hear the energy, not just allowing

1714
04:36:51.599 --> 04:36:59.040
you to feel so much more relaxed and healthy in

1715
04:36:59.279 --> 04:37:10.479
this way, but also you start to realize that actually

1716
04:37:12.959 --> 04:37:21.919
what's happening now without a healing, relaxing energy spreading through

1717
04:37:22.080 --> 04:37:34.880
your body, it's actually changing your life. It's actually changing

1718
04:37:35.000 --> 04:37:40.080
the way you're going to feel, not just now, but

1719
04:37:40.240 --> 04:37:50.479
tomorrow and the next day. Is your health improves, not

1720
04:37:50.799 --> 04:37:58.240
just your physical health, but your mental health. Things that

1721
04:37:58.680 --> 04:38:05.240
used to bother you past, for some reason, no longer

1722
04:38:06.599 --> 04:38:13.119
have the effect that they used to because something has

1723
04:38:13.599 --> 04:38:26.599
changed deep within you. Maybe things they used to cause

1724
04:38:26.680 --> 04:38:38.680
you to feel anger no longer have that power to

1725
04:38:38.840 --> 04:38:44.479
control you the way they seem to be able to before.

1726
04:38:48.159 --> 04:38:58.959
As you realize that you're the one who decides what

1727
04:38:59.279 --> 04:39:12.400
affects your one who decides to feel relaxed and calm

1728
04:39:14.080 --> 04:39:30.119
when you choose to enjoy noticing these natural developments, healing

1729
04:39:32.680 --> 04:39:41.279
continue to grow and improve your life day by day,

1730
04:39:47.159 --> 04:39:55.439
including of course, your ability to relax so much easier

1731
04:40:00.360 --> 04:40:09.479
and sleep. Here it's the most natural thing in the

1732
04:40:09.639 --> 04:40:18.680
world to you, because fall in the sleep is something

1733
04:40:18.880 --> 04:40:29.680
that you've done so many times in your life, and

1734
04:40:29.880 --> 04:40:33.680
you know that you were born, as we all were,

1735
04:40:34.479 --> 04:40:45.759
with the ability to fall asleep naturally, were born with

1736
04:40:46.360 --> 04:40:58.799
that ability to just drift off into a deep, healing sleep.

1737
04:41:04.759 --> 04:41:09.560
Even when we're kids, sometimes will fall asleep and my

1738
04:41:09.639 --> 04:41:15.840
daddy will want to try to think stay awake. Maybe

1739
04:41:15.919 --> 04:41:19.279
it's a birthday. In the morning, when it's Christmas or

1740
04:41:20.119 --> 04:41:23.240
holiday or something we look forward to that when I

1741
04:41:23.319 --> 04:41:28.439
got to sleep. But the more we want to stay awake,

1742
04:41:30.639 --> 04:41:37.680
the more we just start to drift. And the more

1743
04:41:38.400 --> 04:41:42.680
you fights drifting, we try to stop yourself and drifted

1744
04:41:42.799 --> 04:41:55.799
the same the detail is stronger thout. Drifting becomes because

1745
04:41:55.880 --> 04:42:01.279
we're born not just with the need to relax deeply

1746
04:42:03.000 --> 04:42:12.840
and to actually fall asleep, but it's our birthright, it's

1747
04:42:12.959 --> 04:42:23.479
part of our DNA, and sometimes as we get older

1748
04:42:23.560 --> 04:42:37.000
in life, perhaps at times we have forgotten the relaxing completely.

1749
04:42:38.759 --> 04:42:52.119
It's not only a wonderfully pleasant experience, it's also really easy.

1750
04:43:03.479 --> 04:43:11.360
It's very very easy, because that's all it is.

1751
04:43:11.520 --> 04:43:12.040
It's just.

1752
04:43:15.520 --> 04:43:31.040
Decided. And when you press the play button on my recordings,

1753
04:43:32.919 --> 04:43:44.080
you have given permission from my voice to election. When

1754
04:43:44.119 --> 04:43:48.200
you press that play button, you have given me permission

1755
04:43:49.439 --> 04:44:03.720
for my words to effect. You are positive, opening a

1756
04:44:03.880 --> 04:44:27.639
positive way, opening up the mind to useful and healing suggestions.

1757
04:44:32.200 --> 04:44:43.599
You can have such an alasing effect how you feel

1758
04:44:44.360 --> 04:44:58.520
right now as well as those changes the continue long

1759
04:44:58.880 --> 04:45:09.159
after the recall it acts, those changes within the continue

1760
04:45:09.439 --> 04:45:25.680
to flourish and grow, transforming your life in positive, beautiful way.

1761
04:45:28.759 --> 04:45:35.799
Allowing you to move forward in your life in the

1762
04:45:35.880 --> 04:45:53.880
pig that you choose for yourself. This feeling, this feeling

1763
04:45:54.240 --> 04:46:09.680
to you and experience of safety, comfort, calmless, this feels

1764
04:46:09.840 --> 04:46:31.159
sa nice, such a healthy place to be, and that

1765
04:46:31.520 --> 04:46:53.319
postivity rose within me in jupree day forward. You had

1766
04:46:53.439 --> 04:47:04.119
to find them over axed, is it please? I don't

1767
04:47:04.240 --> 04:47:14.360
mind it right, And it's not that you're thinking slopper,

1768
04:47:16.599 --> 04:47:20.240
it's just that your mind would be less knocked down.

1769
04:47:21.400 --> 04:47:34.639
I necessary negativity because from now your mind to rejects negativity.

1770
04:47:38.720 --> 04:47:46.919
For now you're going to start noticing when negativity arises.

1771
04:47:50.759 --> 04:48:04.680
You can just say stop, stop, let begativity will turn

1772
04:48:04.799 --> 04:48:20.360
around and believe in your lone stop and let the

1773
04:48:20.560 --> 04:48:38.400
activity disappear. And did you notice that you feel way

1774
04:48:38.799 --> 04:48:55.439
a relaxed and you probably expected now co congratulate yourself

1775
04:48:56.200 --> 04:49:03.520
because you're the person has done this. You able one

1776
04:49:04.159 --> 04:49:09.000
that has opened your mind up to the simple face.

1777
04:49:12.439 --> 04:49:24.759
You can't feel less body end de mind. I follow

1778
04:49:25.240 --> 04:49:34.439
your mind. U. The birthright of bel is just sleep

1779
04:49:34.919 --> 04:49:54.240
easily when you choose that's a nice feeling? Who's nice?

1780
04:49:54.319 --> 04:49:54.720
Doesn't that.

1781
04:49:58.080 --> 04:49:58.360
Feel?

1782
04:50:00.080 --> 04:50:00.200
Uh?

1783
04:50:02.159 --> 04:50:18.200
Back? Here is spitting spending to mine a special place.

1784
04:50:21.799 --> 04:50:37.919
Activity can't. Activity is bad. It's bad. It's not about it.

1785
04:50:41.000 --> 04:50:45.080
Does it does it doesn't deserve to be here, doesn't,

1786
04:50:45.200 --> 04:51:05.560
couldn't harm. Abtuity has a place to my mind. M yeah.

1787
04:51:12.959 --> 04:51:18.919
Sections