(music) SNOW Monday’s Boring Objects Let me Bore you to Sleep #1529 Jason Newland 5th January 2026

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland and this is... Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. And today it is Monday's Boring Objects.

And I'm gonna talk about snow. Yes, snow because it snowed. There was snow on the ground.

Oh, I actually posted a little video on YouTube, on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook of Vinnie in the snow. And he loves it. I mean, it was, it settled, but it was not deep.

It was kind of like, I'm surprised if it was even an inch. I mean, an inch is a lot, obviously, as we all know, but so I went out thinking, I know what I'll do. I'll film him.

I actually, before that, I called my neighbour to see if I could take him into the garden. Because I thought it might be quite cool if we could take him into the garden with their dog and then have them running around. I can like film them so that way he's not on the lead, you know.

But I wasn't able to do that. So I took him out. He was on the lead the whole time, but I filmed him as he was on the lead.

We, he was on the lead. And it's almost like the snow produced a lot of new smells. A lot of like unusual smells.

Maybe it changed the smells that were already there. Maybe. But he was, he had proper good sniffs, really been sniffing.

Like, really like excited by all the different things he was smelling. And we went into the park. I don't think we got as far as, no, we didn't get as far as going into the park.

But we, yeah, it was, I don't know, it's only about like 10, 10 minutes, 14 minutes long. So it was a very, it was, it was a very slow walk, very slow walk. And then we met up with another dog walker.

So we stopped. I stopped the camera and put it away. And we ended up walking back a different way with that person.

Which way did we walk? I don't even remember. That's weird, isn't it? We went somewhere anyway. And the person I saw is actually, she's the person that kind of got me into TikTok.

In a sense of, I mean, I've been posting videos on TikTok for, I mean, I was posting them on there in 2000. And let me check, shall I check? Let's have a look. 2000.

Turn that down. By the way, does anyone know what a grey heart means? Because that's what's next to my name. I just went onto someone else's live and they moaned at me saying, we don't like, we don't like the grey heart.

I didn't put the grey heart on there next to my name. So if anyone knows what that's all about, please let me know. What am I doing? Right.

I've also just posted my relax in 10 minutes, number three on there. So I've now got 142 followers. That's not a lot.

But yesterday, the last, the last four, like 1234, the last six videos I posted, one's got 687, then 237, 633, 634, 217. And the one I just posted has got 20. And as I said, I'm also posting on x now as well, as well as Instagram.

So just trying to go down to see when I first started posting stuff. Fourth, 22nd of April 2023. Apparently, I'll come out.

And there was just videos. I did go live. I'm sure I went live in about 2022.

I think I tried to they don't think they'd let me because I didn't have enough followers. I don't know. Anyway, if you know what the grey love heart, or the grey heart means, it just might just mean that I'm just really old.

I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, so snow.

It got me thinking. Got me thinking. Because technically, I haven't really seen a huge amount of snow.

But I've also seen quite a lot of snow. You know, when it has snowed, it's sometimes it's been like full on. So I'm just thinking when is my earliest memory of snow? By the way, Vinnie's in the background.

So not a lot I can do unfortunately for that. He's determined. I'm going to collect his bones off the floor at some point and then maybe, you know, put them away when I do a recording.

Just give me time to you know, you've had 20 years to get yourself organized. I know. I know.

20 years this month. Happy 20th anniversary. I've got two new podcasts.

One is Relax In 10 Minutes and the other one is Sleep Hypnosis. And they're specifically made for those podcasts. Now technically, I've got hundreds of sleep hypnosis videos and recordings.

But these is going to be the latest ones. And I'll have a banner at the top of each image, Sleep Hypnosis and Relax In 10 Minutes. Just with a number 123 and they'll be numbered.

I'm planning on doing that this year. And I've also shared them to all the podcast hosts and stuff like that. So my memory, my first memory of snow would be 1978.

Now, I know it obviously would have snowed before then. And having lived in Newcastle, I'm sure I probably saw quite a bit of snow. I just don't remember it.

I don't remember. The only weather I remember in Newcastle was the summer when it was really hot and the ladybirds were just everywhere. We had a swarm of ladybirds.

I think it was all across Europe. But I mean, literally, they were everywhere in this country. I loved it.

So I made friends with them. Because I kind of thought, well, I mean, using the word swarm is not very nice, is it? And they were coming into the country. And I thought if I was going to be rude to them, when they first get into the country, they're just gonna, you know, they're gonna feel like that hostile reception, feel that they're not cared for, and then be hostile in return.

And I thought, no, I'm going to be friendly to the ladybirds. Right from the offset, you know, straight away, nice, friendly, treating them like ladybirds. Not like some kind of non ladybirds.

Horrible thing. You know, like they're not even ladybirds. Like, no, treat them as if they're ladybirds.

And I got on really well with them. No problems. They didn't feel like they were a burden, or they were a pest, or that they were feared.

They just felt accepted by me. And it not only changed my behavior, but it seemed to, well, it affected my behavior, it affected their behavior towards me. And I remember them saying to me, I wish more of you humans would be kinder to us when we first got here.

Because, you know, we could all live in harmony. And I remember sitting down with them as there's millions of them. Only two chairs, but millions of them on that chair.

Probably about 700,000 on top of my head. And we had this chat. And I thought, the problem with that is like, it's really hard to keep hold of a conversation when there's that many voices going.

It's a lot to keep hold of. So, but the basically the general, I guess a general, final kind of feeling was just having some respect, mutual respect. They respected me, I respected them.

We had different life experiences. And you know what was weird, actually, with the ladybirds, because they'd traveled across the ocean, they'd traveled across Europe. They'd, you know, they'd really, it's not, it's not easy traveling that distance.

It can be dangerous as well. And when I found out what they were actually getting away from, and what they've been through, like talking to them individually, they really became, they were ladybirds, you know, I couldn't think of them as anything else but ladybirds. I didn't think of them as being this, something else like a monster or a horrible person or like an insignificant creature.

But they were genuine ladybird and deserved my respect. So yeah, I don't remember the snow, though. By the way, ladybirds were only here for a while, didn't stay for long.

So I'm trying to think when the snow, probably 1978 was the first time that I remember snow. Yeah, I would say. I would say, or was it 77? I think it was 78.

And I was living in the house, it was a council house. It's a newborn, newborn, a new build. And me, my three brothers, my two little brothers, but my baby brother was just born.

And the two parents were in this three bedroom house. And I remember waking up, I don't know how late in the year it was, it might have been like, it might be early in the year, might be like January, but it might be November, December, I don't know. But we woke up and the back door, we're basically like I had kind of some kind of blizzard.

And the back door was unopenable. Couldn't couldn't open it because it was the snow was rolling, basically covered the whole of the door. Because the I suppose the alleyway in the back that led to the to the to the back door, the whole area was completely solid snow.

And the front door was also all blocked in. And we're still stuck. We need help.

Can you please help us get out of this house? I'm not sure if my dad had to climb out the window. For the sake of the story that make it more interesting, wouldn't it? Or he he lifted the lid off the house and got down that way. Or he dug underground to get out.

I don't know. I think he might have been able to get I think he did my he might climbed out the window and then move the snow shoveled the snow away from the front door, cleared the path and then cleared the back way as well. We weren't allowed to go to school because school was closed.

Yeah, hey, I still have fond feelings of that fond memories. Anytime the schools were closed. I felt groovy.

It's felt so nice. It felt like it was supposed to be, you know, like being at home, watching television, watching the snow. Oh, I love being indoors watching the snow outside.

Everything's so bright and clean. Well looks clean. That's what I need to do.

So I need to get some snow in my bathroom. So I'd look clean. Oh, just trying to think we I was very short back then.

I was I was eight years old. So yeah, I don't think many eight year olds particularly tall, but I was probably the size of a five year old. And the snow was pretty much up to my waist nearly.

But it was so much fun. It was quite hard to manoeuvre to be honest. There's a lot of fun.

And we I think my brother's just like helped me through, you know, just drag me drag me along the top. And one thing I didn't like and you could call me and I spoil sport or maybe I was just born a grumpy old man. Maybe that was how I was born but never liked snowballs.

I thought I just thought snowballs were wrong. Morally wrong. I mean, why would why would someone get that's why I kind of want my thoughts.

Why would I have some kind of happiness from causing distress to another person, which is what snowballs is is causing someone else distress. Unless you're in an agreement that you both want to chuck snowballs at each other, then go ahead. You chuck whatever you want at each other if that's an agreement you've got.

It doesn't matter. It's chuck eggs, swords, whatever. If it's an agreement and you both decided yeah, we're going to chuck these things, then that's between you and the other person.

If I haven't signed a contract, which in them days, no one, none of the other kids seem to walk around with contracts and a pen, would you sign here so I can chuck snow at you. No one did that. They just did it.

Didn't ask. And I'm pretty sure that they purposely included gravel and stones in the snow. My brother, he just chucked the stones.

He didn't even bother with the snow. He just got rocks and chucked them, painted them white. And before we chucked them, obviously you don't chuck that back.

I need to paint it white. But my head. No, don't worry about it.

So I didn't like the snowball chucking. To me, that's the same as chucking a firework at someone. I mean, it isn't at all the same, but it's something that I don't want to happen.

I don't want it to happen and I wouldn't do it to someone else. And it's nothing like chucking a firework at someone. One is incredibly dangerous and illegal and chucking a snowball is probably not illegal.

Unless the person you're chucking it at is driving on a motorway, then yeah, probably illegal. In fact, guaranteed frowned upon. I just didn't see the point in causing someone else distress.

It's a bit like when I was in the Sea Cadets and we used to go swimming. Now, I'm not a swimmer and I just can't really swim. I can swim a little bit, but I just went along because I thought my friend was going in.

And there was this outside or outdoors swimming pool and all the other kids were there and they would jump in, but they were dunking each other by pushing each other's heads under the water. Again, no contracts, no agreements. You look around the place, not one solicitor.

I mean, to just grab someone's head and push it under the water without any kind of consideration or to even ask the person, you know, do you enjoy being half drowned? Oh, I love that. So it's okay if I do that to you. Oh, yes, please.

It's lovely. Can you do it a little bit longer so I can forget the last hour or so of my life? I mean, I don't know what that's about. I mean, I don't know if it's for me, it seemed to be a male occupation.

And that's because it's only because I never did that with females. I never did it with males. So it might be exactly the same with women.

But with the swimming and the sea cadets was all men. It was no, it was just boys, no girls. And quite often in the swimming baths, it's like female only times.

I'm unable to get into those places. I can't pull it off anymore. I never could pull it off.

But I don't have male only times. So I don't know. And you know, in a way, I wish they did, because I don't want to get into a swimming pool looking like this when there's women about because I don't care what a man thinks of what I look like.

And I shouldn't care what a woman thinks of my body. But I do. There's not a lot I can do about that.

You know, if I'm standing there with my swimming trunks on, and a woman laughs at me, I'm gonna be I can pretend that I care all I like, but I will be upset. If a man laughs at me, then I have the choice. I have choices, don't I? I can get upset or I can jump on his head and dive on him.

So you know, accidentally. So it's certain, it's different. Plus, I don't know if people would laugh, would they laugh? When I did boxing, and I was 38, I think.

I was at university and I used to go twice a week. I wasn't allowed to spar because I was too old. I wasn't allowed to compete because same reason, too old.

But I could go along, I could train, and I could work on the bags. And we could do a little bit of like, pad work and you know, all this stuff, skipping and all that stuff. But I wasn't allowed to actually spar.

Which is the only thing, to be fair, for anyone that goes to boxing, that's the only thing they really want to do. They want to go in and fight. They want to spar.

Basically, it's like learning to ski, but never actually skiing. You know? It's just a bit pointless. It's not pointless, but it's good training, good physical training.

But it's not that I wanted to compete. I didn't want to get beaten up or anything. But I just like the idea of like, little gentle sparring with someone my own age or my own size.

Hard to get at that time because it was mainly younger people. But there was a few adults, a few older people, some older than me. That's a lie, but some kind of near my age, like 30s.

And they had this gallery, like of chairs and stuff. And the parents of the younger kids would all be there, watching their kids, probably just waiting to, because it was on an industrial estate. So they'd have to come and pick them up.

So they probably just waited to take them. Because only for like an hour, maybe hour and a half. But I'd see the parents laughing.

And that used to wind me up so much, just think that they were laughing at me. Because within about 10 minutes of working out, my t-shirt would be drenched, absolutely soggy. And it doesn't matter.

And that's the same. It's always been the same. If I work out, I just sweat like really big time.

And I mean, it's not so bad if they were laughing at my t-shirt being soaking wet. But I just felt like they were just laughing at me. Because a lot of stuff I couldn't do.

You know, when I said I'll get down, get down on your knees, get down and like, chase this ball and I couldn't do those bendy things, those things I used to be able to do when I was a kid, I couldn't do a lot of that stuff. I could punch the punch bag. I could skip ish.

I used to skip when I was a kid. I used to skip when I did karate. So I knew, you know, I was I'm able to kind of, I was able about now, I was able to kind of skip.

Okay, not great, but okay. And the pad work, I could do that. Okay, that was quite good.

Because there was another bloke there was about my size and you know, his early 30s or late 20s. So that was good. But I really felt that they were laughing at me.

That's what I thought. So it felt a little bit uncomfortable, you know. When I did the taekwondo, when I was 40 years old, 40, 41.

I, this was in a gymnasium of a school. And that came out twice a week. But the odd parent would stay and wait, but the rest of the time they wouldn't.

And there'd be no one laughing. And I wasn't the, I wasn't even the oldest person there. The instructor was 10 years older than me.

And there was kids, of course, there was going to be kids at those places. But there was also teenagers, there was people in their 30s, 40s, 50s. So it was quite nice to have that range of ages.

And I didn't feel like I was the oldest. I didn't feel like an old fossil. And having the instructor being older than me, made me also feel like, yeah, because he took it up when he was my age.

And now he was a black belt and instructor. So I thought, yeah, that's good. And occasionally a parent would stay and watch, you know, but I'd like end up talking to them.

It's like, you know, that'd be, that'd be good. But no one was like, there was no one all pointing at me and rolling around on the floor laughing uncontrollably. Didn't have that there.

With the Wing Chun in 2004, when I was 33, there was no parents and it was predominantly, it was all adults, actually, I think it was a 7 to 16, 15. No, it's all adults. There was no kids there.

I don't think there might have been one or two. So I preferred that because that was more, because it was quite full on intensive, full contact. I don't think it should have been but it was full contact and I got my rib broke and plenty of like injuries along the way.

I couldn't have been paired with someone that was too young. Like, you know, if they'd have paired me with a, well, you need to be paired with someone the same kind of size or age or whatever. I mean, the same way as if I get, if I got paired with someone that was 20, then they can have an advantage over me because I'm a lot older now.

But back then, I might have had an advantage over them. Or not. Who knows? It's anybody's guess.

I'm only making it up. Okay, the real thing, when I went to the dominoes club, when I played dominoes, I've never played dominoes. I have played dominoes.

Actually, dominoes isn't a bad game. I wonder if there's any skill involved, though. Is this skill? I suppose you get, you have to match the one with a one, a three with a three.

Yeah. So that, I don't know if it was a Christmas, but it was like around that time, 1978 and it snowed. And my dad took me and my three brothers, no, two brothers to, because we lived where we lived.

And because it's always a new build estate, new council estate. And outside the kitchen or outside of the back bedroom, or the bathroom, you could see the motorway. And it was pretty much at the end of the garden, there was a slope going up, leading to the motorway.

So it wasn't right next to it, but you could see it and you could hear it. And that led to a bridge that was just to the side of our house. So what we did is we went up and we had a sleigh, my dad had a sleigh and we slid down the other part of the side of the bridge down to basically near where we were living.

It's just around the corner. We could see the back of our house there from that, or the back of my nanny granddad's house as it turned out to be. My still my favourite house, the favourite place I ever lived was there.

And if I ever came into any kind of decent money, I would try and buy that house back and move in. Oh, yeah, yeah, I probably would move in. Because I love that house.

I realise it won't have the same, it'll be different now. Because someone else has lived there for quite a few years, maybe more than one person, they might have sold it on. But I like to think that the atmosphere will still be there for my nanny granddad, having lived there for so long.

I don't know, I might be wrong. So but it would be decorated differently anyway, wouldn't it? I suppose if I was there, although I'm not really much for decorations. I mean, these walls were done when I moved in and I've not done anything since.

11 years, I just, I'm not really, I'm not really a visual person. I'm a visual person when it comes to certain things. But generally not.

Yeah, so I kind of look at the wall and I think yes, it could be really nice. But at the same time, I'm not sure I'd appreciate if it was nice. It's just a wall.

It's weird, isn't it? I mean, I've seen other people's flats and they're so nice. In this building. I've seen one, two, three, yeah, three other flats in this building.

And they're all nice, or they were all nice. One person moved out. But they're really, you know, the sofa, settee, living room, like a proper living room.

This is an office stroke living room. So I've got a desk and computer and I've got my settee over there, TV on the wall. But it's not, it's not, you know, it's not suitable for visitors.

There's no room for people to come and sit down and sit on a chair. I can't have anyone sit next to me. You know, unless it was, I probably could do that in a relationship.

But outside of that, I couldn't, I can't sit next to someone and just, it's awkward. How do you talk to someone when they're there? They're right there like, hello. Hello.

And I keep looking at them. Or do you talk without looking at them? Which is a little bit rude. I prefer to have a chair that's kind of facing them a bit.

And at the same time, if I'm watching boxing on telly, I can't or you know, I kind of, I don't want someone next to me talking. So I can't have anyone. I can't have anyone in the room when I'm watching boxing.

Because the truth of it is, I'm the one that's going to be talking all the way through. So I'm going to be disrupting and disturbing my own pleasure. And I'll end up missing the whole thing.

So between me and them talking, it's just ruined. Ruined, I tell you. I don't think I enjoyed going down the snow in a sled.

It was a plastic sled, I think, or was wooden. I don't know. My dad, my dad might have made it out of like a pallet or something.

I've got this idea that it might have been wooden. Like a sled that they already had. Maybe it was from his childhood.

I don't know. I mean, when he was a kid, they had the big freeze. When it was the whole of the country, pretty much was frozen for about three months.

Have you not heard about that? The big freeze? Yeah, the rivers froze over, like froze for a long period of time. And people ice skating on the Thames, probably on the other, the other rivers around the country as well. And I think then we had the big thaw that I wasn't alive back then.

But it was it was a big old deal. It was. It's almost like if it happened now, it would be it would be like, we have to make changes.

We have, you know, back then. They accepted that the weather we have weather and sometimes is extreme, sometimes is not really is extreme in this country. But when it does happen, you know, it's a shock.

And although apparently in Norwich, it was minus 12 degrees the other night. Now, I don't think I've ever been anywhere where it's minus 12 degrees. That's really cold.

I mean, that's that's minus 12.5 degrees. I think it was. That's really too much.

No, that is really too. I couldn't. Don't fancy that.

I mean, that's isn't that illegal? Oh, so I reckon Oh, yeah, I went out. Yes. Oh, so I went out and I'm holding the camera filming Vinnie.

I didn't take my gloves with me. It was a sunny day. Blue sky.

I mean, I knew there was snow on the ground. I knew it weren't going to be warm. But for some reason, I thought it'd be okay.

I don't know if I thought maybe the temperature would just it would just change just for me. Because I didn't have my gloves on. You know? Well, it didn't.

And my hands were I felt like my hands were in ice cold water. Nice. No, it wasn't quite that bad.

But it's really cold. Really cold. Like really, really, really, really, really, really cold.

And I didn't enjoy it. And I'm like, Oh, so I ended up having to pull my because I had a cardigan underneath my, my coat. I had to put a cardigan down and just go just make that that noise.

You'd be surprised but it didn't help. Didn't do anything. Just made me look a bit silly.

I think it just shows you that acting like a ghost does not change the temperature of your hands. Maybe it's because ghosts are cold. I had a dream the other night that I was I had gone to heaven, let's say.

But in the dream, I'm not quite there. And I'm saying I'm kind of asking people, well, where am I? And they said, Oh, you know, you're you've left. You've left the planet as it were.

I said, but I don't want to. So what do you mean? So I don't want to say, but what does it matter? You've done it. You've left now.

Yeah. I said, but I want to go back. You can't go back.

I said, I want to. I want to go back. I want stuff to do.

I've got podcasts to make. There's TV to watch. I like being on the planet.

You know? Yeah, not all the time, but you know, I do. I kind of, if I have to choose, I choose to be here. Like, you can't.

So I started doing, he said, I started doing things to get myself back here. Thinking that I can't say what it is, because it's probably not very nice. But I was, I was trying to cause myself to feel something.

So they bring me back. So like touching the wall and punching things and bashing against things, just trying to, it's almost like pinching yourself. You know, when you people say, oh, pinch me and they on my daydream and pinch me and you pinch him and they said, and they say, no, I was talking to my friend.

I'm now going to call the police. It's like, okay, wow. You know, and you, I never asked anyone to pinch me.

Am I dreaming pinch me? No one's ever done that. Although I had, I did when I was in a nightclub working, I did have someone pinch my bum once. And that brought up some thoughts.

Because I've seen that in movies, like carry on movies, some of the old movies where they'd pinch, they'd pinch someone's bum. Like it was some kind of a nice thing to do. I mean, it's, I don't think it's ever really been classed as a nice thing to do, but it used to be classed as a harmless thing, you know, back in the 70s, 60s or whatever, maybe not to the person receiving it.

And I remember I was just collecting the glasses or collecting some plates from the tables. So I used to help out and stuff. And one of the ladies on a table pinched my backside, my posterior, and it hurt.

And I thought, what signal is she trying to send to me by hurting me by leaving a bruise? I don't know, there's no way of knowing, was there? I don't know. I can't see my own mum. It's not like, you know, this is before we had camera phones.

You know, we can take photographs of different parts of our body, can't we, from different angles. Couldn't do that before. Could do with a Kodak camera, but you'd have to go in and get it.

You had to get it not prescribed, you know, printed out or whatever. And the person doing that could see the picture. And I didn't want the person seeing the picture of my bum.

So yeah, I don't know, but it hurt. And I remember screaming like, ow! And everyone just turned and looking at me. The comedian wasn't happy because he was on stage performing.

So I was just collecting, it was like closer to the bar. I thought I'd just collect a few bits while I was walking past. And, you know, just on the end of the table, it wasn't going to disturb anyone.

I didn't know that there was a lady behind me deciding to have a good old reach. And I go, oh, ow, ow. And the whole show just stopped and everyone's staring at what's going on.

I said, what are you all staring at? The comedian said, are you okay? I said, no, I'm not. I'm injured. And yeah, I didn't, nothing else happened after that.

But I just thought, why, what, what possible, what, what would be the point of it? Pinching. It's not even a nice thing to do. Even if it's someone that you're with, and you both got a contract, I'm into contracts today.

You both got a contract to say that you're allowed to pinch each other at least three times a month. I imagine my solicitor fees would be very high if I was in a relationship. I've got a new contract for you.

What is it this time, Jason? Well, no, I won't say anymore. But yeah, it's just it's silly, isn't it? So I've never done it myself. I just never seen the point.

It's like, it's not even it's, yeah, it's like going up to someone and just twisting their nipple. I mean, it's not like a bloke doing it to another bloke. It's not, it's not a pleasurable experience.

It's not a great greeting, especially on your interview, job interview. Hello, I'm Jason. And it's hard to move on from that.

I had someone do that to me as well. Vinnie, not Vinnie, Andre, my ferret, he bit my nipple. So I had my top off and I was making a video for YouTube.

It was in the summer. I don't know why I had my top off. But I was just cradling him because he was still a little baby.

So so cute. And he was struggling to get away from me because he was just he didn't like being picked up when I first got him. And he was always biting me for the first few weeks.

But he literally latched onto my nipple. Painful. It was really painful.

Yeah, oh, I had that on camera or on film. It's amazing. Not film, you know, but video.

I don't know what happened to that. I'd love to see that again. That's the thing.

That's part of the reason why I think I've started making videos again, because I lost so many. It'd be kind of nice even though these are boring and they're not supposed to be exciting or interesting. But I do still talk about my life and I do still talk about what's gone on and this and that and I'm talking about Vinnie and what he's been up to.

And the little things that maybe I've done. Now, it's kind of like a record of my life, a catalog of what I've been up to, even though I don't get up to anything interesting or exciting. But it would have been nice to have some of those probably hundreds, over 100 videos that I lost.

Hundreds over the years where I was just talking. I had Andre and other ones where I was doing one, I poured a yoghurt over my own head for no reason. There was one period in 2011.

I was going through a manic period. I didn't know that I was going through a manic period. But it was.

Wow. I was I was doing some really weird things. There was one video where I could not stop laughing.

I was uncontrollable laughter. Just by saying the word wibbly wobbly. I kept saying wibbly wobbly.

And for some reason, it just tickled me wibbly wobbly. And maybe it's my face saying it wibbly wobbly, or mouth wibbly wobbly, or how it sounds. Wibbly wobbly.

I don't know. But I could not stop laughing. And I was filming myself.

And I posted it online. And, and I want to did the I want to pour the yoghurt on my head. My cousin contacted me to see if I was all right.

She said she didn't like seeing that. Because he thought maybe I'd like lost the plot a bit, which I guess I had. Because I went from Yeah, I kind of dropped down as a bipolar thing.

So I dropped way down after that. But I was like, but I made so many videos, and I ended up just getting rid of them. It'd be weird to watch those now, you know? I mean, they might be around someone might record them, might have copied them, downloaded them off of YouTube.

Back then. And it's quite a long time ago now. Is it 14 years? 15 years? So it's weird.

Just weird. I just Yeah, very, very strange. It's really strange to think that in 2011.

I'd only been doing these recordings for five years. That's all. Just five years.

And now it's 20 years. And at the time, five years seemed like quite a long time. But 2011 seems a long time ago.

It's strange, isn't it? Maybe it's not strange. I just don't know. So me and my family were chucking snowballs at the cars on the motorway and the police sort of started siren started.

So we all kind of ran. And what we did then was we had some because the snow is on the ground for quite a while. We built some igloos.

I mean, technically didn't need to I had a bed upstairs. But I was fascinated by igloos and the igloo dwellers because I like I used to see documentaries and see movies and stuff. And the idea that you could be warm in an igloo did not make sense to me.

How can you be warm in an igloo? It's ice. So what I did is I built one. I built an igloo.

And I spent many, many hours doing this. So I made blocks of ice put like, patted down blocks to make into ice, knowing that the temperature overnight would freeze it into like an ice kind of thing. I used dirt and snow mixed that together for cement.

And I made this igloo and it was still there months, months later after the snow. It took ages to melt. Because master builder, I was a master of a lot of things.

I remember when I first started learning how to bake cakes becoming master baker. I wasn't great. Thing is, my stepmom, my first stepmom, she was pretty much my world.

You know, she'd, as far as when it came to family, she was she was at the top. She was the person that I just adored. So when my other brothers, my two older brothers were in the garden, although I ended up, I did have to go in the garden as well.

But sometimes I was able to get away with just being in the kitchen. And helping my stepmom make cakes or cook the dinner or something like that. So I got to be in the warm, not get dirty.

And I got to eat cakes because you know, test got to taste, test some cakes and lick out the bowl. So and spend time with her, which is my favorite thing to do. I don't know what it was with the garden thing.

My dad had a thing about getting us in the garden and making us do stuff that was pointless. Like moving one big massive pile of dirt from one end of the garden to the other. For literally no reason.

Or seemingly no reason. It probably was a reason but it didn't seem to be a reason. It was just I think he just like bossing people around.

And I didn't like all that. It just seemed pointless. Why would I be out in the garden, dig in a garden, when I could be indoors, reading a book, or be out with my friends playing or watching television, anything's more enjoyable than digging a garden.

And for me, I mean, some people love digging a garden. I'm not one of those people. And if I had a garden now, I mean, if I was dating someone that had a garden, or I was living with someone, and they had a garden and they wanted to do gardening, good for them, let them do it.

You know, do what you want. But I'm probably not going to be getting involved in gardening because I just, it was ruined for me as a kid. It turned into like a horrible chore.

It's like cleaning a car. I wouldn't clean a car. If I had a car, I would take it to the cleaners to get it cleaned.

I wouldn't clean it myself. Because whenever I clean my dad's car, it was never done good enough. You missed a bit, you missed a bit, the wheels aren't done enough.

You know, why did you empty the water into the on the front seat? It's like all kinds of things like that. Why have you siphoned off the fuel? Why have you set fire to the car again, Jason? All little things, little niggly things. And it put me off doing it.

You know, I mean, so I wouldn't do that. I've done lots of things in the house. I remember one thing I quite liked.

Don't ask me why, but I quite liked it. Pointing. I'm not talking about just all of you.

Pointing as in putting in the between the bricks and a wall like this, like a wall that's already there. Putting in the cement. It just, I think it's like just replacing the outer cement and putting in and putting it in a certain angle so that the water kind of comes off it or something.

It's a long time. But this I remember doing it anyway. I quite enjoyed it.

This is a very old house that we lived in. And between nine and 15. I was nine and 15, not the others.

My other brother was 11. The other one was 13. So yeah.

Wow. Nine, 10, 11, 12, 13. It's a big difference, isn't it? Between 13 and nine.

Nine and 13, 14, 15, 16. So three years. And he left school.

He left the house. He moved out, I think. Nine, 10, 11.

When I was 12. Then he came back. Then he, oh, I don't know.

And I'm just trying to think of other times. Other than that time with the snow, with the the old, the new build house. I remember it snowed in the old house, the one that was in it when I was nine to 15.

There was one particular time when it snowed. And we all had measles, not measles, chickenpox. Do you know what? I went to volunteer 10 years ago at the hospital.

And they gave me blood tests to see whether or not I was okay and allowed to, you know, volunteer and make sure I didn't have any diseases and stuff. It turned out I was not vaccinated for measles. So I had my measles vaccination at age 45 or 46.

How is that possible? Not just the measles or whatever. I think there was a couple of others as well. I had the one that they do in the back of the shoulder.

Is it the other side? It might be the other side. We've all got these scars on the back of the shoulder, which that was one of the most painful injections I ever had. I remember that day because all the boys were walking around punching each other in the shoulder.

Because that's how, that's how intelligent we were. We were all in a lot of pain. So what do we do? We punch each other in each other's arms.

We punch, punch, punch, punch, punch, punch. Like, how about just being nice? Being caring? No. The snow, but during the measles, during the chickenpox period, and my oldest brother got it first.

Then my other brother, okay, the two brothers got it first, one of them before the other. Because we're all living in the same house, there was a good chance we were going to, it was almost like we were going to get it. I knew I was going to get it.

And I wanted to get it. So that I could get off school. So I remember, I thought, you know what I'll do? I'll start, I'll start wearing my brother's clothes.

And I got told off like, take your brother's underpants off of your head. Okay. And go to the headmaster's office.

Did the trick though. Two days later, covered in spots, itchy. I didn't feel well.

But the feeling of not going to school was greater. The pleasure, the happiness, the relief was greater than the feeling of being ill. Oh, it was lovely.

And all three of us were off school. My little brother was probably not even at school at this point. Maybe he was about four.

And because I'd say this was when I was about 11, maybe 12. He was born when I was eight, about four years old then. And I remember I was like, because we were there all the time, it was snowing outside.

Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. And I was, because my stepmom was a drawer, a really good artist. Brilliant at art, brilliant at playing the piano, just brilliant at everything really.

And I wanted to, because I wanted to be like her. I wanted to be able to do the things that she did or join in, you know. So I was gonna, I decided I was gonna do some drawing.

I had a pad and paper and I remember just lying down on the floor. It's weird that I could ever do that. Lying on my stomach with my legs in the air, looking up at the snow every now and then.

And then focusing. And what I did is I drew Buck Rogers, who recently left us. He's, and Buck Rogers was, Buck Rogers in the 25th century, I think.

Big, big hit TV show in the early 80s. And, and he had his sidekick, little robot that used to go, biddy, biddy, biddy, biddy, biddy. And well, he used to have two, two voices, go biddy, biddy, biddy, biddy.

Come on, let's go for a walk, Buck. Biddy, biddy, biddy. Kind of like that.

And so I drew Buck Rogers with his helmet in his hand. Okay. Um, I should explain what I mean.

So Buck Rogers used to have a helmet on his head, because he was a pilot, like a spacecraft pilot. So quite often, he'd have his white uniform on. He'd have it open so you could see his hairy chest.

That was the thing back then. Tom Selleck, Magnum PI, hairy chest, Burt Reynolds, hairy chest. It was a big thing.

Late 70s, early 80s. Hairy chest was, that was the fashion. And so this picture had him without his helmet on, he was holding his helmet kind of under his arm.

And he had his, his pilot uniform on. Maybe a gold medallion. I can't remember.

That might have been Mr. T. Anyway, I drew him. I spent hours drawing him. Hours and hours.

And I was so pleased because it had come out quite nice. And I took it to my stepmom and I said, look at this. And she said, who's that? Elvis? I was like, no.

Didn't look anything like Elvis. But thinking about it, maybe because Elvis used to wear those jumpsuits, didn't he? When he was doing his concerts near the end. So maybe, maybe that's what, it's Buck Rogers, not Elvis.

It's Buck Rogers. Remember? Elvis Presley. Elvis has left the building.

Buck Rogers. Biddy, biddy, biddy, different, different. So I just remember seeing the snow.

It was so good. In fact, I think at one point where the schools were closed and we weren't allowed to go to school anyway. And that was really annoying.

Because the whole point of being off of school is to be off school when everyone else has to go to school. That's what made it fun. Knowing everyone else was off school.

It took away the pleasure. I was a vindictive little boy back then. So other times when it snowed, when I first moved to London in 1991, it snowed really heavily, like really, really thick, really thick.

And I think I was, I started working at the bakery. I just couldn't get through it. It was just, I remember seeing a, I've got this memory of the milk float.

So this milkman going, trying to get through it. And I mean, admittedly, the roads were fairly clearish in a way, because there's a lot of traffic in London, you know, millions of people living there. And most people walking on the road.

But I just remember thinking, well, I haven't seen this much snow since I was about eight years old. I mean, I don't not definitely saying that's what I was thinking. But I imagine I probably thought that.

And then after that, the whole time I lived in London, I don't really remember it snowing. And it must have done. The thing is, for London, because it's quite a, it gets cold.

But at the same time, there's a lot of heat being generated from all the buildings and all the underground trains and all you know, so there's a lot of heat being generated around electricity and white stuff. And all the houses so close together. So it didn't seem to get as cold as what it had been before.

When I lived in a little town on a beach. Did he? I can't remember any other snow in 12 years. Hmm.

Very strange. I was quite busy though, at that time. Some of the time.

Hmm. And then I moved away from London. Hmm.

Did we have any snow? I don't remember much in the way of snow when I lived there. But I know I did go to Wales on a chronic pain relief Buddhist retreat, learning how to help people with chronic pain using mindfulness. Probably the most amount of snow I've ever seen in my life.

And this would be natural for Wales. It was so thick, beautiful, phenomenally beautiful. But then, as I was leaving the area, like going home, it was snow just kind of just disappeared.

You know, it's like the almost like the further I got into Wales, the thicker the snow was. And I'm not saying this. Wales always has snow because of course, I've been to Wales quite a few times and I think it might have snowed when I went to Wales before as well.

I've got a vague memory. Vague, vague, vague, vague. There was a bloke I met at an NLP training course.

And he was from Wales, and I used to go up and visit him. So Wales isn't that far from London. It's a train journey.

It's weird, really. Because I used to travel to Wales when we went tenting when I was a kid. And the journey seemed like forever.

In a car anyway. And he lived in the valleys. He literally lived there.

I'd heard of the valleys. I didn't realise they really were valleys. Really low down.

I'm like, what the heck do you do when it rains? And I think it did get, I'm sure one of my visits, I don't know why I'm still moving my hand like that. One of my visits, it snowed and we got snowed in and I couldn't get back. I'm still there.

I don't remember any more snow for the next six years. Which seems very, very unlikely to go six years without any heavy snow. I mean, it'd be snow, but I'm talking about snow that settles and is exciting.

However, when I moved away again, I moved to the town, this town where I'm at now, to start to be at my university, be near my university. That December, it snowed so much. And it was probably the thickest snow I'd seen for quite a while.

I mean, the one in Wales that I went to on that course was probably 2005, maybe 2006. Yeah. Really, and there was snow on the ground at Christmas, just wasn't snowing.

I mean, a white Christmas technically means that there's snow on the ground, isn't it really? But it wasn't any snow on the actual day. But it was a full on like proper, you know, that beautiful snow where you can't actually see anything hardly. Oh, everything's quiet.

Everything all smells nice, smells fresh. Oh, love it. I love it.

Love it. Love it. There was one time.

There's another two times, there was this little African lady that moved in to the room opposite me. And I was grumpy. I just, I was complaining because she was using the shower like one o'clock in the morning when I was trying to sleep.

Because she's got a job in a kebab shop, I think cash in hand thing. And she just wanted to be friends. And I was I wasn't horrible.

I just was grumpy about that. And we kind of I think we could have been quite good friends. But I just I was going through a little grumpy period.

I wasn't rude, rude, but just not particularly friendly. So I was busy and just I was in a moan, I was having a moan. But something did catch my eye about her, which was very cute, is it was snowing and she was outside building a snowman.

And she looked so happy. And I spoke to her afterwards, because I kind of made up with we didn't fall out over the shower. I just I complained to the landlady.

So then she complained, she told her off. And I think if I was gone directly towards it would have been a bit better. So you know, it was a little frosty for a while.

But then it was okay. And then it snowed and it got really cold. And I said, you look like you're really enjoying yourself.

And she said, Yeah, I've never seen snow before. I don't know whereabouts in Africa she was from, because I didn't ask. But she just like, wow.

I mean, she'd have seen snow on movies and TV shows. And otherwise, she wouldn't know how to build a snowman, which she probably seen on YouTube and stuff. But she'd never seen it in the flesh.

And she was tiny. She was probably about, she couldn't have been more than five foot, probably five foot, maybe a little bit less than five, really, really, really short, and really tiny. Pretty much.

And so I misjudged the size of the snowman. I thought, wow, it's like she did speak and I went out there and it was like about three inches off the ground. I made that bit up.

So when she left, I didn't know she was moving out. She just moved out. She had, there was like a big lorry out the front, or like a removal van thing.

And she knocked on my door. She said, you know, I said, Yeah, I'm moving out. I'm going to London.

I said, Oh, okay. What's going on? She said, I've got no friends here. And she gave me a big hug and kiss me goodbye on the cheek.

I was like, I felt bad. Because I could have been a friend. I learned from that though.

Because up to that point, I generally didn't make any effort with with people I lived with. I tried to kind of keep my distance as much as possible. And, okay, I didn't learn, I did, I did learn.

But I made more of an effort after that, to sort of speak to people that I lived with. Because I lived in so many different places. And I know that it can be problematic to share a house with people, sharing a bathroom and a kitchen and a toilet and stuff.

So I've become, I've had to find ways to survive it. And I wasn't as friendly as I could have been. And the idea that she was literally in a room opposite me.

I liked her, she liked me, kind of, we could have spent some time together, I could have made an effort with her. Which I didn't, I made a little bit of an effort. But I didn't really, not in a way.

Because after the shower thing, kind of, it tainted things a bit. So I just woke up, I was in such a grump because I had to get up, I had an essay. And I had stuff happening.

You know, I had counseling to do. So I had a lot of stuff going on. So I was at university, it was a really busy period.

And I didn't want to be woken up at one o'clock in the morning or two o'clock in the morning. Because when the shower was on, it was like, it's not really loud shower, it's almost like Frankenstein, break dancing or whatever. So I just, and he said, Oh, I've got no friends.

So I'm leaving. I felt bad. Really did, we could have been good friends, we could have, you know, who knows.

But so I learned, I thought, you know what? I was not a very good neighbor. Oops, just bashed the old, the microphone. I wasn't a very good neighbor.

And I've not always been a bad neighbor, but I you know, I've tried to kind of keep my distance because there's been so many weird stuff, weird things happen over the years. And then when I moved into this building, I kind of really made an effort to sort of get to know people just to sort of to be a good neighbor to, to not, not getting into people's faces and get into people's lives, but more just to let them know that I'm here if they need me.

That's more what I wanted to do.

And I wish I'd done that with her. So that she knew that she had someone to talk to, I think that's what she needed someone to talk to, or maybe someone to show around the town, because you just come from another country, didn't know anybody, she was a refugee. And she spoke English, she spoke English good.

But she didn't know anyone, she didn't have any family with us. She was young, she's probably early 20s. And she, I don't know what the situation was with us.

So I could have in that situation now, I would have made the effort like, how can I help? What can I do to help? Back then, I was, I was a grumpy, I was just going through a grumpy period. So when I moved here, I kind of made myself more available. And it did backfire on me in a big way.

But hey, I managed to help quite a few people along the years along the way. And the thing is, I would never have turned her away anyway, if she knocked on my door and said, I got no, I need food, I got no money for food, or I got no soap, or I've run out of deodorant or anything like that. I'd have helped her out.

I'd help anybody out. I think most people would. But I guess it was hard for her to do that when she thought maybe I didn't like her.

And I didn't dislike her, I just didn't want to be woken up by that really loud shower that was next to my room. It was basically in between our rooms. But on my side, the toilet was on her side.

And so I made sure I ate loads of baked beans before I went to the toilet. And I'd go early hours in the morning just to get her back. That's childish.

So we had a lot of snow. So for about two or three years of me living there, out of the four years I lived there with snow, when I moved to the next place, again, I made an effort with people without that backfired. But I was dating this lady in the end of the year 2011.

And I was living on a hill. Weird place to build a place, build a house on a hill. I was living wasn't at the top of the hill.

I was living halfway up a hill. It was like a big site. Weird.

But anyway, I was on a hill. And it was a shared accommodation. Again, there was one, two, one, two, three, four, six rooms, six rooms.

Four of them were en suite. So I had an en suite room. Four of them were en suite, no wait, one, two, one, two, three, no three of them were en suite.

I think. And but one of them was really big. So there's one really big room.

Two small rooms still like one upstairs, one downstairs, one really big room that was pretty much the size of the en suite room. And the bathroom, but no bathroom upstairs. And then there was my yeah, so it was a weird, weird place.

Nice house, new build and everything, but just weird. So I yes, I was dating and my girlfriend, she lived she was from I can never remember the place, not Poland, not Bulgaria. What's the other place? There's other places but I forget.

Anyway, she was from there. And she was so excited to see the snow, which I'm sure she saw a lot of snow when being in Eastern Europe. They get more snow than we do, I think.

She loved the snow and phoned me up saying, hey, Jesson, it's snowing. It's snowing. I said, Oh, yeah.

I know. I didn't know. I looked at it, but I didn't really know.

But I looked out the window. Oh, it really is snowing. I didn't want to seem too excited, you know, Jesson, it's snowing.

And I was amazed. Because bearing in mind, we were living on a hill. People were parked on the hill.

And they started their car. What do you think happened? They started sliding down the hill. And they seemed surprised at that.

But when they took the break, they're on a hill, covered in snow and ice. And they're surprised that when they take the brakes off the car, literally the cars were just banging into each other going onto the pavement. I'm surprised that no one got hurt.

And they were literally just bouncing off of each other. I don't know if anyone got insurance involved or anything. But it was funny to watch.

Because no one was learning from it. Because other people just coming out of their houses, seeing what was going on, but still thinking, well, I'll be all right. Getting into their car and their car was just doing exactly the same thing.

All in slow motion. Because the snow is so thick, so they couldn't there was no like speed. But at the same time, it wasn't thick enough to stop the car from moving.

Because it was on a hill. Very strange. So I don't I'm not sure I can't remember it snowing.

I remember being in the counseling office. Probably to end of 2011. No.

2010. Because I was living. Yeah, I had to travel on a bus.

So I was in this counseling office and I was waiting for the bus. And literally I couldn't even see in front of me because of the snow. Basically like a blizzard really.

And I think the bus did turn up eventually or I think it did. Yeah. But I had to wait about an hour.

There was a bus stop. But it was still the wind was blowing. So it's kind of there was no shelter really.

Even though there was a shelter. I just love the whiteness. I love the like, if you can go out in the middle of the night when it's snow on the ground.

And it's like I'm not saying it's like daytime, but it's it's it's not dark, is it? And if you've got a big moon, with no clouds, you can walk around and you don't need streetlights at three in the morning. Why would you want to but you know, just generally. Occasionally, there's been times when I've gone out just because Vinnie's decided he needs to go out.

And it's been the middle of the night. And I've gone out and it's almost light. There's no rhyme or reason for it.

It's just the streetlights are off. It's three in the morning. It's not a summer.

But it's light outside. Not light as in daylight, but just almost like just I don't know. That's happened a couple of times.

So I've been here for 15 now been here since nearly 11 years in April of 11 years. Just before my dad's 80th birthday. This this coming April, Vinnie started barking so I had to shout.

Stop it. I don't know what it was. He must have heard this annoying because I get so calm when I'm making these videos, these recordings.

So peaceful. I've been talking for an hour and a half. And you know, my breathing is nice and deep.

And I'm just very calm and relaxed. And suddenly he starts barking and it's not nice. I mean, you're not gonna hear it and it won't be on the video or the audio but oh man, it's just high pitch.

I told him off and now he's like cutting up to my leg. Bless him. I think it's it's just this activity outside.

That's all it is, I think. And there was a couple of times when it snowed really deep. And people were making I think at least two occasions since I've lived there, where there's been people making snowmen in the park.

So the snow settled long enough for that to happen. And then three years ago is snowed the week that I got Finny or just after I got him. So I got him on the Saturday and it was snowing on the Monday or the Sunday.

And it's settled in that it was settled quite heavy as well. So and that's, I know it's a weird thing to remember. But you know, this is like the last story really of snow.

Apart from today, or you know, the I took him out in the snow. He loved it. He like he don't care about the cold.

He's fine with it. And it was deep in we went into the field. It was deep.

He pulled me down somewhere where I couldn't see my foot in and I did slip. But it was in the snow. So it was fine.

And I thought that's good. I've done quite well. And then it started to go twice like it does quite quickly.

Some walking on the pavement, I've got my boots on, I don't slip a couple of little slips, but I don't fall over or anything like that. Got my gloves on ready to sort of protect me. Also make sure that I don't fall on him.

And everything's gone fine. And it's raining and all the ice is gone. It rains on the Wednesday or Thursday, all the ice gone.

It's like, this is good. You know, because the ice would be getting a bit slippery, like all gone. And then in the evening, my friend downstairs calls out and says, Do you want to bring Vinnie in the garden with Logie? I said, All right, then.

I let Vinnie out. He runs out. I go down.

I'm not prepared at all. I do put my coat on, luckily. And I've still got my crocs.

And I take one step and I slip down the stairs. And I bounce down the stairs. And I end up fracturing to two fractures in my back.

And so I go to hospital and it's really weird because then for the next however many weeks, I'm picking up his poo. I've got no one else to do it. So I'm taking him for walks.

I can't stop doing that. I reckon I must have looked, I think I was half screaming as I was trying to reach down to get the poo off the ground. They must have thought that poo must smell really bad.

If he's screaming like that. But no, it's me back. It was weird.

It hurt when I stood up. It hurt when I sat down hurt when I laid down. I had to kind of organise my back in a certain way.

So it didn't hurt. It was very, it's a big part of our body, isn't it? But that's the last time I remember any kind of like thick snow settling. And then in the snow on the ground still, it's, it's kind of hasn't settled hugely on the grass, but on the pavement on the road it did.

But it's still not thick. It's just quite thin. But it's very cold.

I tell you kind of the the heat just in here. I've got a metal covering to my laptop. And it's cold.

It's like cold, cold, like touching a window. Because it's not it's turned off. So it's not on.

I didn't have to say the last bit today. I could have just said it's not on. Or it's turned off, but not both.

Both weren't needed. It's the same thing, isn't it? It's cold. It's not hot.

So it's hard to tell really, isn't it? Whether or not it's going to what kind of weather we're going to get. I mean, it's beginning of January. It's anyone's guess.

We're going to get every weather over the next 12 months. I got this thing I like to say on the first, first day of the year. To anyone that will listen.

It's the coldest day of the year today. Or it's the hottest day of the year today. It's the windiest day of the year today.

It's the rainiest day of the year today. Like because whatever weather it is, that is the most it's been this year because it's the first I don't know why I'm explaining it. But I've been doing that for a few years.

And I've noticed over time, less and less dog walkers are out on the first of January. I wonder if they're trying to avoid me? So, 10, 11, 12, 1, 2. Right, that's me done. I thought I was going to get away with no editing because he kept quiet the whole way through pretty much.

But nope. He had to have a little barking session. So I'm going to go thank you for listening.

And watching remember to be kind to yourself because you do you do do you do do do deserve to be happy and be gentle with yourself you deserve to feel safe and also remember that you are already enough and you're going to be okay lots of love bye