(10 hours) #31 Airports SLEEPY Boring objects (Jason Newland) (29th September 2022)

Hello, and welcome to Boring Objects. What is boring objects? Well, it's me talking about boring objects. No, yeah.

My name is Jason Newland. This is boring objects. And I forgot what I'm doing there.

And my website is jasonnewland.com. Now, even I mean, some people might say, what is what's the point of this podcast boring objects? Well, let me tell you. It's basically just an opportunity to feel relaxed. You can listen to me talking about something.

It could be anything. It could be a book, it could be books, it could be about, I've done a few of these over the last year or two. And it just could be, it could be anything.

And I just talk about a subject or an object or an event from my life. And that really is it. Honestly, that's it.

And it gives you an opportunity to just relax. Maybe it's a distraction, maybe a company, maybe you fall asleep out of boredom. And I kind of wish I could think of a better title for the podcast.

But boring objects is the one I've got at the moment. Because it doesn't really give any information about what the podcast is about, does it? Or what the what the reason for the podcast is. But it is to relax is to bore you, maybe into relaxation or to sleep.

So what could be the subject matter for today? Oh, I can't think. Airports. Here we go.

Airport was quick, wasn't it? Airports. Now, I'm not really a well traveled person. Not really.

Like I've been to a few places, but nothing. Yeah, I mean, I've, I'm one of these, I class, so if I go to an airport, and even if it's a layover, so I'm on the way some to somewhere and the plane stops to refuel, or we have to change planes, as far as I'm concerned, I've been to that country. Because I have been to that country.

But technically, I've not, you know, I've not been allowed out of the airport. But I've still been to the country because the airport is in that country. So you know, I class myself, that's how I see it, as far as I'm concerned, I've been to more countries than I've really been to.

So the first country, I've been to some countries by ferry. So France, and Belgium, been to Belgium a few times. France, just once I traveled across the south of France, when I was about 18, 18 years old, I think.

But the first flight was actually before that it was when I was 18. It was earlier in the year, early in the summer. And I got a flight to Spain, Malaga, or Malaga, Spain.

And that was my very first plane flight. And I was on my own. And I didn't really know what to expect.

And I was, yeah, I was a bit concerned, you know, wasn't really looking forward to it. But I was looking forward to getting away. And the airport, my memory, I can't remember, I think it was Stansted airport.

And I was there for a long time waiting for the plane. I don't know, 15, 16 hours, something like that. Because I got there early.

And then there was a huge wait for them for the plane to leave, which was pretty much the next day. So what I did is, you know, I bought some books and had read, actually read a couple of Woody Allen books that were very funny, Radio Days and what was the other one? Radio Days. I'm trying to think now, that's weird.

I used to remember it. I remember it last week. Why has it gone out of my head? Radio Days.

And I think it was white, is it white feather? Something like that. Anyway, they were very, very funny. I also had a copy of Viz magazine that I took with me.

And that was very funny as well. So, you know, I was having a good laugh. I was, well, I was 18 when he, yeah, I was 18.

Wait a minute, was I 18? Was I? Was I? Was I? Yeah. No. Yeah.

Yeah, I was. Yeah, I was 18. I was 18.

And yeah, 18, 19, I was 19 that year. So it was 1989. I was 18.

And I'm glad we got that sorted out. I was so worried that I might get a fact wrong. Oh, no.

So I remember I went, went, I went to the airport. I got, actually it was, I got a coach to the airport from the train, well, it was from the bus station. So it was a fairly fair journey.

And I spent pretty much 70% of my money on the fare to get there, on the airfare. So I was going there with very little money. I won't tell you about the trip or anything like that.

I'll just try and keep focus on the airport. But I ended up coming home the same day. So yeah, I pretty much got ripped off by a taxi driver.

And I ended up with no money, hardly any money. So I thought, well, what's the point? I'm going to be sleeping on the beach with no money. And I might as well just, just come back.

So I had enough to change the flight to get a return flight or to change. I feel I might have had a return flight that was like open, if that makes sense. You just had to book it and get charged however much to book it for whenever.

So that's what I did. And I got back. Yes, I think I must have been in Malaga, Spain.

Got there, got into a lovely weather. It's like really beautiful. It's really nice.

I mean, I need to go back because it is it was nice. It's probably more the kind of summer that I can handle kind of heat that's doable. And got yeah, got a taxi and then he just decided to take me all around the mountains for some reason.

And I had to just stop him and say, stop. How much is it? How much you want to pay? No, no, no, that doesn't work for me. Sorry.

How am I? And then I thought, oh, just take you back to the airport. And it was just getting silly. So but I remember I really liked the airport at Stansted.

It had everything I wanted. Now, it had places you could drink. I didn't drink alcohol back then.

But it was sure as places you could eat as McDonald's, I think. And it was a lot more relaxed than it is now. And this is about 19, they said 1989.

So everything was more calmer, more relaxed. And going abroad to Spain from England was almost like just going to the next town. Because we still needed passports and stuff.

But it was Europe, we're all part of the same place. I could go out there and live out there, work out there without any problems. Well, apart from being able to speak the language and being able to get a job.

You know, I knew people that had done it gone out there and it wasn't quite as easy as it wasn't always easy. I knew I was going to do that. That's why I went out there.

But I ended up coming home early. So I don't remember much of Malaga airport. So I'm thinking that when I booked the plane, I didn't have to wait long.

It was like a couple of hours. So I probably spent more time outside the airport. And then I just went in a half an hour before I needed to just go on the plane.

And I remember on the plane, I think it was coming. So actually going to Spain, a lady held my hand. She held my hand because I was so scared.

She held my hand and I think I broke a few of her bones. I didn't mean to. But I was, I mean, in her hand.

Nothing weird, wasn't kicking her. No, I just is like, I think I squeezed the hand a bit too, too much. And then she tried to kiss me and it was weird.

So but anyway, I didn't happen. I don't remember Malaga airport at all. I remember I remember walking out of the airport and just breathing in that air and the warmth.

But it was lovely. It was like, wow, this is really, really nice. And then that was it.

And then I sort of didn't get that far and came back. So the next flight I ever took, so I didn't do another one for quite some time, a long time, in fact. So that was 89.

I went through the whole of the 90s without getting onto a flight. I did. I didn't.

I mean, I actually got myself. In fact, I don't think I even used a passport to go to. I used like a temporary passport.

So I got my first proper passport in 1994. And it ran out. So I used it in 2002.

So I used it, you know, just two years before it ran out. So because I decided in 1994, I was going to travel. I thought, what am I doing? Why am I just working and I want to go travel while I'm still young? And that was my plan.

But then. It just didn't work out for whatever reason. I didn't didn't go anywhere.

Although it's not totally true. I did go to I lived in Ireland for a while in. Well, it's actually it was 90.

Was it not? Blimey, it was 94, wasn't it? Wow. Really? Blimey, I didn't think that was the same year. Anyway.

But I went by ferry, so I didn't didn't get an airport thing when I went to Ireland. Although my friend kept saying, well, you get a plane, it's quicker, it's easier. Well, yeah, it's quicker, maybe dependent on, you know.

Well, yeah, it's quicker. I remember the ferry, it took me all the way to Wales. The the coach was all the way to Wales before getting onto the ferry.

And then it was all night long. So yes, a heck of a journey. But I liked it.

Not so much the coach part, maybe. But definitely the ferry. I love the ferry.

You know, there's so many toilets to choose from. And I didn't get on a ferry just because of the toilets. You know, it's not I've got some kind of weird toilet face or hobby.

But it's, you know, it's just nice big area. And I don't know, I've always had ever since I was a little kid and I was taken onto the ferries to go to Belgium. Always had a positive feeling towards ferries.

I have just have. And I remember because I was little when I first went and I was running around. And it was like hide and seek with my brothers meeting other kids.

And it was fun. And I've still got that positive feeling towards ferries, which is why if I get an opportunity, I'll get on one. I like them.

I do. And I'm lucky I don't have any travel issues. So it doesn't matter how busy or how topsy turvy the weather is, it makes no difference to me.

So that's good. I love the old ferries. But so that the next time I know this is about airports, isn't it? The next time I went to an airport was in 2002.

And my friend and his friends had all booked a holiday to go it was a supposed to be a skiing holiday in Bulgaria. But someone pulled out. In fact, I think what it was is my friends, she got pregnant and she couldn't go.

So they offered me a ticket, didn't offer me to go to start with. They might have done, I might have just said no. I can't remember.

So I decided to go. So you know, it's quite short notice, but I felt about three, three weeks. And I managed to get the time off.

So I went up. And I think I stayed with my friend in London for the night. And then we went up to Bulgaria.

No, not Bulgaria. I went to the airport. I'm thinking it might be Heathrow.

It might be another one. But we went to the airport and it wasn't like a huge wait. It really wasn't.

We really kind of did it quite well. And the weird thing about it is there was loads of stuff there, there was bars, there was a place, I think we were even playing pool in one place. Now I didn't see any of that recently.

Heathrow is practically nothing there. Apart from when you get through the security, there's all these expensive shops selling crap, like expensive crap, like designer stuff. You know, I remember, maybe I'm wrong, but I have memories of you get through, there's loads of places you could drink and have a laugh.

And it was, you know, quite a nice place to be. Not nice at all. I didn't really like and places where you could sleep.

They've now got, they can't, you can't lay down on anything anymore. And it's, there's limited seats. It's, I don't, I don't enjoy Heathrow.

I'm not, I'm moaning about it. I know, but I'm going to moan. I don't care.

It's, I don't find this to be a very nice place to stay, to wait for, for a plane at all. I didn't like any part of Heathrow, if I'm honest. Yes, the toilets were okay.

Again, I've not got an issue, I've got not a thing about toilets. I'm just saying they were okay. They were.

But, I don't know, Heathrow, I think the airports have gone downhill over the years. It might just be me, but there was a time when you could just, there was so many places to sit, so many places, like with seating, chairs, tables, so many places to like hang out. And people would be on the floor, there'd be people laying down to sleep.

Thousands of people all kind of just waiting for planes and that. Now it seems everyone is just, there's nowhere to go. They're, they're really quite, it's such a huge area.

So I guess maybe it's much bigger than it used to be. It's a massive area. So anyway, I did that, went to Bulgaria.

So Bulgaria is the next airport I'm going to. Didn't really spend any time there. I got off and then just left.

Got on a coach that took us to the hotel through the mountains. And I'll tell you what was weird is I had a cold when I got onto the plane. And as soon as I got off the plane in Bulgaria, as soon as like the air hit me, my cold just went.

The mountain air, as soon as, it's more the coach than the, than the flight. But as soon as I got into that mountain air, my cold went. Like just disappeared, completely disappeared.

So I don't, I remember Bulgaria airport coming back because my friend was ill. So we had to call a paramedic and a doctor and everything. And, you know, so he, he was quite unwell.

So that was memorable, but it's just, I just, the actual airport itself just seemed to be very big, but very empty. Not a lot of people around. So we were just sitting down.

And so that was, that was Bulgaria. The next time I traveled wasn't until recently, like on a plane. 2001, 2000, no 2002, 2012, 2022.

So 20 years went by before I got onto another plane. Who'd have thought it, eh? 20 years. And that was going to Thailand.

So I went from, but again, I visited different countries. So I went to, oh, what is it? Dubai. So I went from Heathrow to Dubai.

And then from Dubai, so stopped at Dubai. So as far as I'm concerned, I've been to Dubai, but never got to actually get off out of the airport. And then from Dubai, changed planes and went to Thailand, Bangkok.

So I've been to Bangkok airport as well. So it's been three airports, Heathrow, Dubai, Bangkok. Coming back, it was two journeys coming back, not just one.

No, three journeys. Yeah, so it was the first plane stopped at another part of Thailand. So left at Bangkok airport, another part of Thailand.

And then went on to Dubai. And then from Dubai to Heathrow airport. The second time, I did it just, I was, I went from, from Heathrow again, and then went straight to direct to Bangkok.

So it was a 12 and a half hour flight, something like that. So that was the airport against Bangkok airport. It's, it's okay.

It's just, they almost look so similar. And the only thing is, is what I'll tell you now is on the way back, the latest time. I don't know why I didn't check it beforehand.

But it went to Sweden. So went from Bangkok to Stockholm, got off the plane and had to wait for the next plane. And then from there to Heathrow.

Sweden's much, or the Stockholm rather, that airport is very small. Not outside, but inside. It's, it's just everything's smaller, like the security is that little, it's a room.

And I'm sure it's, they've got lots of different rooms for security for different flights and that. But this was tiny compared to Heathrow. So I remember getting through the security at Stockholm and then getting to Heathrow and literally being in a queue that lasted for about two hours, just in security.

Or no, that was the passport, just for the passport bit. And literally we were walking, I felt like I'd walked for miles, kept making this go back and around and back and around and back and round. So Stockholm airport, although small, I would say it's nice.

I quite liked it. Not a lot going on there. But I'm not a huge fan of Heathrow.

Just, I don't know. This, Stansted may not be any better now, but I just, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I just have these memories of there being lots of things to do.

You know, like arcades and like game, you know, you can play arcade games and just things like restaurants and pubs and bars and things that you could do while you were waiting for the flight. But it doesn't seem to be anything anymore. And maybe I'm wrong.

Maybe that never happened. I went through a weird period in the nineties that might have distorted some of my memories from the eighties. I don't know.

But it's, I don't know, I just have these memories and it was nicer. I did enjoy the flight, but it was a nicer wait. And that, that wait in 1989 at Stansted airport for the flight to Malaga in Spain, I enjoyed that wait.

I actually enjoyed it. It might sound strange, but I did. I had my big bag or a bag and I just, you know, just did whatever I needed to do.

I was looking forward to getting away and it was just nice. I was reading, I was laughing, I was eating. There's everything I needed.

In fact, I kind of didn't really want to leave the airport. If I'm honest, I was quite happy there. I also didn't have to go home.

I was fine. And, but I did have to leave because the plane arrived. So, yeah, that was, that was my experience of airports.

Not been to a lot. How many does that work out? Stansted and Heathrow in the UK, Malaga in Spain, Bulgaria, and then Bangkok. But I'm going to include Dubai as well, because that was part of the journey.

So that's six. And there was, I think, Phuket on the way back from the first journey. So that's Phuket.

I didn't get to go off of that. In fact, we stayed on the plane for about two and a half hours. So I was at that airport, but I never got to see it.

And then the next time, I suppose the only other one would be Stockholm in Sweden. So that's eight airports. One I've not seen, but all the other seven I did get to see.

The eighth one, the seventh, the eighth was Phuket, and that was in Thailand. But that, I got to see the outside of the airport. But I didn't actually get to go inside the airport.

But it looked lovely. It really did. Oh, it looked nice.

I had cravings. I just want to go in there and check out the toilets. No.

Well, maybe. So that's it from this boring objects. Airports was today's subject.

If nothing else, I hope that, you know, you got to relax a little bit, maybe. But to relax, relax. Boring objects.

Airports, let's write it down. So I remember. So thank you.

Thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy. Be gentle.

Be gentle with yourself. It's very important because I've been thinking about that a lot lately and being gentle with ourselves could be the most, could be the best thing that we can do. You know, just being gentle.

Anyway, take care and I'll speak to you soon. Lots of love. Bye.