(no music) Q&A Friday | LMBYTS #1366 | 6th June 2025

Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. This is Q&A Friday. Yes it is every week of the... Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

I don't know where I was going with that. My website is jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. I'm doing something a bit different today.

I am holding a microphone in my hand. What I've decided to do is I'm going to answer the questions but at the same time I'm also going to give a guided tour of my home. So what I've done is I've plugged in a microphone into my iPhone.

That's it. Microphone into my iPhone. I've tested it out.

I've not used this thing for years but I've tested it out and it seems to be okay. It might not be... It won't probably be up to the same level of wonderfulness as I usually have but it should be okay. There might be a bit more background sound.

There might be a few hisses and pops and stuff but hopefully it won't be. So I've got... The questions I've got is Barry, Michelle, Hope, Raviel. I'm good at mispronouncing names so I'm sorry.

Ben and Michelle. Now I'm going to read out Raviel's question first. Can you describe the building you live in? Things like how many units there are, what is the garden like, where is the garden in relation to the building.

Things are very different where I live. Southwest US. So it's all very interesting and perhaps slightly boring to me.

Did you say boring? Did you say... Let me get this right. Me telling you about my lovely home is going to be boring? I don't think so. You'll be on the edge of your seat in excitement.

Maybe not. So what I'm going to do, I'm going to do that tour of my home and at the same time answer the questions kind of. So the first question I'm going to answer is Barry's question and then I'm going to go on my little tour starting with the front door.

Now I had to leave the doors open for me to get in and out of the different rooms which means Vinnie will be very much listening for the neighbours to come and go so he'll be barking probably. But I'll just edit that out. Barry asks if you could choose any one or three or five people in the world to invite to a dinner party, who would you choose?

And Barry's also added maybe been asked this before.

I tell you what Barry, I think I have but it doesn't matter. I don't mind how many times I get asked the same questions because it's probably going to be a different answer every time because it's all going to depend on my mood. And sometimes I'll answer a question and then later on I'll think, ah, you know, like I missed something out, like maybe, oh, this is a different movie that I really like.

Now I just realised I'm going to have to do something. Is it still working? It's still working. I need to put my phone in to do not disturb mode otherwise it could completely interrupt the recording.

So hopefully it won't. This is an experiment by the way and if this doesn't work then there won't be a Q&A Friday this week, as simple as that because I'll be very annoyed. So I'm going to start by moving around the flat.

So at the moment, so what I'm going to do is just tell you to start with, don't forget also this room, the living room, a lot of soundproofing in here. Now see if you can tell the difference when I go into the hallway. I go into the hallway now, no soundproofing in here at all apart from one strip near the front door.

I turn right and I turn right again into my bedroom. There's no soundproofing in here but there is furniture so I've got, you know, I'm not sure how loud this is. I've got the window open as well.

So what I might do is go, I won't go out of the door because then you'll try and get out. So as I walk in the door, the first thing I see is a cut board and there are two, Finny stop attacking me. There are two packets of water on the right hand side on the carpet.

There's an empty box from Amazon that needs to be chucked away. Finny, stop it. Finny is getting excited now.

There's a broom which is probably the most grottiest broom in the world and I think I borrowed it off my friend downstairs and never gave it back. He never asked for it back. I don't think he wanted it back.

So if I go, unfortunately Finny's, I'm going to go open this door. Now this is the storage cupboard. It's a little bit echoey in here, quite cold in here actually.

This is where the mice used to live. They loved it in here. We haven't seen any for years now so thank, thank or whoever, blimey.

So in here, it's messy. It's not like, it's not dirty, it's just messy. There's just bits and bobs.

There's a table upside down and I know I give the impression it must be quite a large space if there's a big table upside down. Well it's not a big table. It, well it's just like a, you could fit two people eating on it.

You know what I mean? I mean you could have four people with that, it'd be very small. Couldn't be my size. Unless of course you had chairs.

You wouldn't be able to sit on it. So looking around, there's a shelf ahead of me and it's wooden. It's been there since I moved in.

There's a couple of air grates on the wall because that wall faces the outside of the building. So my flat is mostly outside. That made sense when I said it in my head.

What I mean by that is the only bit that's actually joined from the outside, so I've got nothing, I'm connected. So when I go out my front door, that bit is connected and there's a flat opposite. Then there's the stairs.

So I've got no neighbours on either side of me. I've got no neighbours above me. I've got one neighbour below me.

So that's quite a good thing really, that I haven't got lots of different neighbours to deal with. So the neighbour opposite me has got a neighbour next to them and below them. That neighbour next to them has got a neighbour next to them and below them.

The two neighbours below them, I've got neighbours next to them and above them. So it's only me and my neighbour downstairs that I've only got each other to deal with. And I think it's much, it's just nicer just to have one neighbour.

It just means that all the walls are outside walls. Apart from basically once you get past my bedroom. So from, yeah the whole flat really is outside walls.

But I've also got a loft ahead of me. Ahead of me? Above me. So what have I got? I've got a, I've got a blender.

Didn't I have a blender? Wow, I've got a blender in a box. I've got a little, tiny little guitar. A ukulele.

Is it a ukulele? Yeah. What Vinnie are you staring? What are you staring at me for? I've got a briefcase that I used to use when I was a counsellor. So there's some documents in there I think just from the past.

There's some carrier bags. There is my medical notes that I got from the doctor back in probably 2000. If Vinnie's gonna bark any second now because someone's coughing downstairs.

Then, oh no it's a dog. I thought it was a human coughing but it was a dog barking. Yeah the medical notes I got from the doctor.

Because I wanted to see what they've been saying about me. I'm not paranoid. I'm not honest.

There's various bits of equipment I've used over the years. Mic stands, mics, headphones. Just all kinds of bits and bobs.

A little toolkit. And to the right of me, right round the corner. It's quite a big space if it's empty.

But when it's full it's not, doesn't seem quite so large. To the right of me, there's a hole where the mice used to live. Anyway let's not talk about that.

There's a couple of pictures. Some soundproofing. A few more documents and stuff like that.

You know just paperwork. Very bright light. There's also the what's-it boxes in here.

The fuse box. Which would be very difficult actually because if it went out this place is almost impossible to get to there. So I need to sort out this room.

I'm going to tidy it up. There's all white walls. What I didn't know.

What I didn't like with the cooker and the toaster and stuff like that. And I'd be in the dark in that room looking for the fuse box. The light in that room works.

Separate. It's a different light. I didn't know.

For years I didn't know that. About eight years. So these doors are really really really strong doors.

I used to have an old, an old counter door with some like glass, like meshed glass. And so anyone could see in really. They could see in.

See if he was there. And I didn't realize until quite quite late on. When I locked myself out twice.

Once I got, no three times. Once I got a door, door person to come. And they came.

They changed the lock. The next time my friend broke in using a credit card. It wasn't a credit but it was like a bit of card you know.

They bent it and pushed it in and it opened. The third time he wasn't around. And the third time.

So I'm on my phone and I'm just like phoning him up. And I lean on the door and it just opens. There was, there was no lock.

There was a lock but it was literally just push it open. I didn't tell anyone. It wasn't something I was going to really promote.

I mean you couldn't just push on it and I mean because I'm quite heavy. I was heavier then. I was pretty much leaning on it and it opened.

I was like wow. So yeah. But I got a new lock, a new door.

The lock ceases a bit. It's a little bit stuck. But you know it's alright.

It's generally okay. I know how to kind of unlock it now. There's a peephole in it as well which is good.

And there's a cover on that. So I don't, if I don't know who's at the door. I don't know how simple is that.

So you know. I've got a light as I turn left. There's a mirror that's been up there for 10 years which shows my likeness I guess because it is me isn't it.

To the left there's a coat rack with three knobs or three rack you know hooks on them. One of them's got loose over the time. I remember because my dad came around here when I was just first moved in.

He put up a towel rack in the bathroom. Bathroom cupboard. And put up a mirror.

So he's really good to check the electrics. Connected the washing machine I think. All kinds of stuff like that.

And the cooker because he's an electrician. So he did you know really helped. And then he said you don't want the, don't want a coat rack on above the radiator.

I said on near the door. I said yes. And he seemed surprised.

He said why would you want a coat rack there. Well there's a radiator just below it. It's the best place in the world to have a coat rack because your coats get dry.

Wow how could he not know that. About 2000 and about 2019, 2020 I asked people to send me in and I just say how if I'm helping them and how I'm helping them whatever. And I printed loads of them off at the time.

So I've got them kind of darted around the flat. There's not as many around as I was. But there's one as soon as I walk in it says I'm sleeping again.

I have tried everything to help my sleep over the past 10 years. And what okay probably not the right word. Not the right voice.

And whilst going through a very tough period late last year I discovered Jason's podcast bore you to sleep is the, bore you to sleep is the only natural product that has worked for me. And now it's a regular guest during bedtime. I couldn't thank Jason enough.

P.S. look forward to the updates about Andre. Whilst I was experiencing some horrible sleep patterns for the first time in 10 years, I've been able to sleep naturally tomorrow. So thank you.

Tomorrow, I had loads up, but they seem to have. I don't know, maybe I've took them down or the fallen down. They just disappeared over the years.

So that's everything there. So who would I have? I'll do a little bit at a time then I'll talk about who would I have to dinner? Well, first of all, I wouldn't want them here. I wouldn't want to have to cook for them.

So it'd be a case of them. But then I wouldn't want to go out either. And I suppose if I had a chauffeur to pick me up, that'd be okay.

I guess it's imagination. So I can just be transported there, can't I? Like in Star Trek. So that's cool.

Who would I have? This is going to sound weird. I'm going to go in a different direction to normal with this one. Okay.

I don't know why, but I've just got this. I want to find out what people will really like. Okay, this bear with me.

I'm not saying I want to have lunch or dinner with these people. But I thought it would be interesting to really get to know some of the more unsavory characters of the world of history. Not the world now, but of history.

And I don't know, it's weird that that's coming to my mind. Is that weird? It probably is. But I would find it fascinating.

Because you know, I constantly have heard about people there, this, there, that, and then I meet them and I think, oh, you know, they seem quite nice. Got some pretty radical views. But generally, outside of the views and all that stuff, they've got kind of fairly decent people, just like ordinary people.

Maybe I won't go down that road. Maybe I'll think of someone. Okay.

Elvis. My normal sort of group would be sort of Elvis, Buddy Holly, Bruce Lee, Michael Jackson. I've got questions for Michael Jackson.

I would like to sort of sit down with him and just, it would have been, I don't think many people got a chance to really know him when he was alive, in a way of like, to be able to really suss him out. I'm sure, I'm sure hundreds of people did, but like the world didn't really. Whitney Houston.

So I think I'd probably, I'd break it up into groups. So because it's my little fantasy, I would have different dinner dates. So one, one would be for singers.

One would be for, let's say, maybe actors. Another would be maybe people in the hypnosis or psychotherapy world, or some that are still here, some that aren't. Yeah.

Comedians. That's another one. Wow.

The amount of comedians I'd like to, the thing is knowing what I know about comedians, just having been around them for like 20 years. Not saying anything bad about them, but they're not always the, they're not generally how you, they are on stage, which would be probably quite annoying. But they're not always, quite often, they're quite quiet.

The ones I met. And sometimes quite serious. But, you know, as I said, it's not a criticism.

It's just, I mean, I was, I was unsex, unsexful. I was unsuccessful at comedy. So I'm not judging in that way.

It's just, that's kind of what I noticed. They weren't always, some of them really friendly, but some of them just, it seemed the really successful ones were often the nicest. Like Harry Hill.

Lovely, lovely bloke. Lee Mack was lovely. Lee Mack once told me that he liked my act.

This is before he was famous. Before he had any kind of anything to judge it on. He was quite a new himself to be fair, but he did.

I used to see him regularly. You know, like every week for four years, I'd see him at least once a week for four years. Old Lee Mack.

But I probably wouldn't bother with many English comedians. I'd probably go for the American ones, the ones that I looked up to in my late teens and early twenties. For example, Sam Kinison, Bill Hicks.

I quite like to meet Andrew Dice Clay, Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Redd Foxx, Lenny Bruce, Rodney Dangerfield. Who else? Louis C.K. I mean, this, the end, I know it's, you said two or three or five. It's my party and I'll cry if I want to.

I can invite as many as I want. You're not the boss of me. I don't know.

Yeah, I think that'd be cool. But also, I quite like, it's not just dead people I'd like to meet. I got a great joke about talking to dead people.

You might not have heard it, but I still think it's one of my best jokes ever. So, Ricky Gervais is another one. I think he's one of the greatest comedians.

Just one of the greatest comedy minds, maybe. Maybe that'd be a better one. But he is, he's at a different league to most other comedians, I would say, just because of, it's like he's himself in a weird way.

I don't know. So then, other people, I think, I don't know if you can hear the background sound. I'm walking around.

Other people, people, like in a comedic world, Stuart Lee's one of my favourite comedians, like ever. He's English. Yeah, I don't just love American comedians, there's so many British comedians that are brilliant.

And so many brilliant comedians that you'll never get to see, unless you actually go to a comedy club. You know, there's comedians out there that is good. Maybe even will make you laugh more than anyone that you'll see on TV.

Kind of ironically, on it there are, there's comedians out there that will never ever, they won't be on TV for whatever reason. Maybe they don't fit TV. Maybe they're too rude.

Maybe they just don't, their personality doesn't gel with the producers. Maybe their management's not very good. It could be a variety of different things.

Maybe they, all they want to do is stand up comedy. They don't want to be on TV, or radio, or the internet. And you might think, name one.

Name one comedian who doesn't want to be on TV, or the internet, or radio. Name one comedian who doesn't want to be famous. I can.

I actually can. Daniel Kitson. Someone, again, someone that I knew, I'd see him regularly for four years, sometimes multiple times a week.

And he went on to win the Perrier Award. And he does shows around the world. I think he sells, I'm not sure if he sells videos or audios of the shows.

But he doesn't, he's not on the internet. He doesn't do, he does the occasional interview on YouTube, occasionally. Doesn't do any TV.

He was on Phoenix Nights as the bartender. And that was, what, 20 or 25 years ago. But he, yeah, he's an artist.

He's very funny. He ruined a date for me once, though. I'm not joking.

It was the end of the gig, end of the night. I was, I just, we'd all just finished. We went upstairs into the comics room.

I'd met someone. So she came upstairs with me. We were just talking, and we'd gotten on really well until that point.

And then he had her in stitches the whole time. And she just ignored me. He wasn't trying to chat her up.

Vinnie, don't bark, please, mate. He wasn't trying to do anything. He was just being himself.

And she was absolutely rolled over. He'd been on stage that night as well. I think he was the compere.

And for a little while, I didn't like him. I left. I said, oh, I'll see you then.

Bye. I left, I said. Because it annoyed me so much.

Because she literally was just ignoring me. So I thought, oh, can't be bothered. Because it's hard to really compete with someone that's been on stage all night.

Like the star of the show, you know. Can't compete with that. They got married, got six kids.

It's lovely. Really happy for them. No, they didn't.

I don't think they did. But he was very, very funny. He's done a lot of shows all around.

I went onto his website the other day just to check out what he's doing. And still doing it. Very successful in Australia.

And it goes to America, Canada. So in the front door to the left of me, there's a radiator. There's the mirror on the wall.

Who's the fairest of them all? Who's the pinkest of them all? You are, Jason. Next to the ladder that's leaning up against the wall. And that's been there for two or three weeks.

Because I lent my neighbor downstairs the, not the brolly, the ladder. And I just put it on the wall, put it against the wall. And it's probably going to stay there for the next few years, probably.

On the radiator was my hat, my winter hat. There's one strip. I don't know quite why.

There's one strip of soundproofing on the wall. Just near the front door. Really, I'm not sure why.

And it's been there for years. Good five years, if not longer. I used to have a strip on the front door as well.

Just trying to maybe keep out the sound of the hallway. I don't think it really worked. All the doors have got like glass at the top.

You know, like glass section. So you remember when you were a kid and you could look over, get on a chair. And you could look into the bathroom and like, I'm not saying I would do that.

I'm saying if you wanted to. It's very old fashioned like that. So yeah, it's got that.

And there's no point, is there? Because there's no one else in the room. The first thing I did was go in and look through the window, look in the bathroom at the top of the window. And I realised, I live on my own.

There's no point. However, the bathroom, I just looked, I didn't really notice before. The bathroom one is all blocked off.

It's got some kind of material in so you can't see through it anyway. On the top of the coat rack on the right hand side. What have I got? I've got a couple of like jumpers.

Left hand side one is free. And hooks left hand side of my winter coat, which I need to get a decent one. I did actually have two decent winter coats.

I gave one to my friend downstairs. He gave it away to someone that was standing at a bus stop without anything. The bloke wasn't naked, but he gave his coat away to someone.

And then he was going out because I already had an old winter coat that I've still got here. And so I gave my other winter coat to my friend. It's like two new winter coats lost.

And also I don't begrudge him giving it away because that's a lovely thing to do. But it left me. The thing is really, he needed a winter coat more than me because he had no, I've got like fat reserves from the last 20 years on my body.

He was really, really, really, really slim. So he got cold when he was out. When sometimes I wouldn't.

So I didn't need as many covers really as many layers. So I've got that. In the middle is my keys and my Vinnies lead.

There's the old lead, which is very short one, but a neighbor gave me a longer one that expands. Yeah. As I walk down, there is a, I think it's optical smoke alarm on the ceiling that gets checked every year.

It definitely works because I've set it off a few times. So as I walk down and before I get to my bedroom on the left, if I look at the turn right, there's a wall, which is the wall of the, the outside, all of the storage room, I guess. And I couldn't tell you what used to be on that wall, but it was held up with sellotape.

So I pulled it all down. So maybe it was more of those notices that I had, but yeah, there's lots of sellotape on that wall there. If I do a full turn around, there is my Honeywell thermostat controller for the central heating.

So that's there. Well what I'm going to do, I'm going to have a drink of water before I go into the bedroom and I can look at the, just trying to think what other people would I invite to a dinner party? So I think like Stevie Wonder, Delores from the Cranberries, Michael Jackson, Whitney Houston. It's just because they're people that I seriously admired, like as singers.

Is that registering the noise outside? See, I can't, I need to get some headphones, some little headphones so I can actually hear, because this does allow headphones to be plugged into microphone, but my headphones have only got like a big, a big knob. I need a little knob. Just looking at that question, Barry, I don't know, just to limit it to five people, it probably, I think if I really had a bit of time to think about it, like, you know, it was like, this is your only opportunity to invite five people, live in or gone, to spend time, to spend a few hours with them.

Then it's probably not going to be anyone famous. It would be people that I've, that are no longer here. So I guess, or people that I've lost contact with, you know, due to different circumstances.

So it'd be my Nan. I'd quite like to, although I never ever had any proper kind of relationship with my granddad, it would be nice to maybe get to know him as an adult, talk to him as an adult, like adult to adult, because I was, what was I, 20? I was, yeah, 20 when he passed away. So I was, I never really knew him as a, as a grown, fully grown adult.

But like as an old man, as it were, although he'd now be, it'd be 110, 115 now. But my Nan, the two Andres, so the original Andres that lived in Ireland, so he's no longer with us, I'd get him back. My Andres, they were both my Andres really, but you know, the original Andres, and then my little Andres.

My friend Luke downstairs. I'm not sure how they're all getting on with each other, to be fair, because different, different characters. Yeah, so my Nan, Luke, I guess, yeah, the two Andres.

So that's four people. Simon, who, it's gonna sound weird, I didn't really know him that well. But he, he passed away at a very early age.

He was, he was the son of the baker who I worked with when I was a kid. The master baker. I worked in that restaurant, in the bakery.

And his son was so cool. He was about, probably about my brother's age, maybe a year older. But he was kind of, you know, four or five years older than me.

But he's, I got on with him so well. He was kind of like an older brother, however weird that might sound. And he used, when I worked in a chip shop, he used to come in and tease me.

He'd like come in specifically just to make fun of me. And I loved it. I just did.

And then, I think, 87, he, he left us. So, yeah, I'd bring him back. And his dad, I'd like to, the thing is, it's weird.

I don't know if it's I'm just getting old. Well, I'm getting old. But I'm starting to think I want to say thank you to people.

To just for what they've done to help me. Maybe when in the past or at the time, I didn't appreciate it, or I didn't, maybe I did appreciate it. But I didn't show that I appreciated it.

I don't know. But yeah, I'd quite like to meet his dad again, because he's also gone. But I suppose if I was going to stick to like people that were, I had another friend as well, Steve.

Yeah, I think really, I'd probably just stick to people that I'm super, super close to. So as far as people that are gone. So yeah, probably, those are gone.

As opposed to those that I can possibly still get to see, maybe in the future. Or, or the thing is, that would be, it'd be too painful anyway. Can you imagine? You got three hours.

Get to see your nan again. I mean, three hours isn't enough for each person. Three hours isn't enough full stop.

So that would be it. It'd be it wouldn't be it kind of wouldn't matter if it was someone like Lenny Bruce or Richard Pryor. Because meeting them would be like an honour, but a novelty.

But seeing, yeah, seeing someone close, I'm not sure. But probably I'm thinking maybe my nan, Luke, Andre, and my little Andre. And I'd just like to see how Vinnie gets on with him.

That'd be, you know, kind of where I'm with that as well. I'd like to see if they both get on together because they are brothers, by the way, after all. So what's the next question? What on earth am I talking about? This isn't for Friday, but I can't click on the playlist on your website to hear podcasts.

Okay. I did reply to that. I've had the same problem says Hope.

I've sorted it out. I wrote and Michelle replied. Thank you.

Well, I think what it was is, well, from what I could work out, I'd set it up so that there was ones without music with music, five hours without music, five hours with music, 10 hours without music, 10 hours with music. When the only podcasts I've actually sorted out in playlists have been the ones without music. So I've deleted all the ones that say without with music or five hours, 10 hours.

So you just get those lists. It doesn't mean I'm not going to add those on later, but I need to do the ones now. You know, I'm still working on the ones.

And like the Let Me Bore You To Sleep, the podcast for 1250 to 1300. I'm still working on that podcast uploading because there's just, it's just taking time. I'm downloading them, then changing the name, uploading them.

So yeah, there's still quite a lot to do just for the Let Me Bore You To Sleep ones. Then I can have a look, because the ones with music, there's probably, probably over 300 Let Me Boy To Sleeps that have music as well. So I'd have to go through them.

So we'll see. We'll see what happens. I just, I'm not gonna, by taking them off the website, it makes it a little bit easier, just do one bit at a time.

I can put it back bit by bit, if that makes sense. Right. Hope.

It's a great name, actually, isn't it? Hope. What are your favourite foods? My favourite foods? Right, let's continue with the tour as I tell you about my favourite foods. By the way, I hope this audio isn't awful.

If it is, well, there you go. Sorry. So, I'm facing the Blu-Tack on the wall, and I'm gonna turn around.

This is the entrance to my boudoir bedroom. Is that a boudoir, isn't it? Right, so, all the doors are scratched to bits. They've been, they've got like bits of chipped, bits of wood, like stripped off, and the bottoms were all kind of scratched from the previous person that had, I think she had like massive dogs living here.

So, it's probably, the doors have probably been here for 20, 30 years. I could get them changed, but I'd have to pay for it, so I'm not gonna do that. Not any time soon, anyway.

So, there's a door frame. It's always handy. There's a door.

All the doors inside are just, you know, door handles. You know, you push down rather than turn, the stem ones. Just really, really standard door handles.

I could put on really nice ones if I wanted. Probably wouldn't even cost much money. I could have done so much with this place.

I really could. I think the thing is, right, when I moved in, I just, it was almost, I didn't believe it. I guess I didn't believe it was gonna last, that I was gonna still be here in 10 years time.

That's kind of surprised me a little bit. So, I didn't really bother with any kind of decorating or making it nicer or, you know, I've got a new bed, got a new fridge, washing machine, things like that when I first moved in. Freezer.

But, you know, I didn't really do much as far as decorating. I've still got the same, yeah, still got the same light shades as I had when I first moved in, that my dad put up. Old hanging down lights.

Just like basic. They work, but it's very, very basic. So, as I walk in, the door's on the right hand side.

This one stays open all by itself, if I leave it open. There is a t-shirt over the top of it. There's not as many cobwebs now, because I did clean them all away with the vacuum.

No, I did it with a brush thing and that just made a mess, but yeah, I did clear most of the cobwebs away. So, dust and stuff. So, as I go into my bedroom, what I can see right now is a stand in the front door, the doorway, and there's these bits of wood that go from doorframe to doorframe that, like, separate the room from the hallway.

I think pizza. See, I do like a nice roast dinner, but I like things with choice. I like lots of different things.

I'm not really into a lot of one thing. Does that make sense? I think I should have been born Spanish, because the tapas, the Spanish tapas are amazing. So many different choices, or even Indian.

You know, you could have a banquet. So many different things. But sweet corn pineapple pizza, I do like.

So, I've got my punch bag right ahead of me. It's not right ahead of me, it doesn't block the door. It's a stand up one, it's Everlast.

It's one of those with a base, it's got water in the base, very heavy. I won't punch it, because I'm basically holding the microphone and the phone at the same time. Different hands.

I need a longer microphone lead, really. Next to that, on the floor to the right, is my dirty washing. There's not much there, because I did some washing today.

There's also a bunch of toys for Vinnie. Does that squeak? No, it doesn't. Some balls.

There's a toilet roll down there for some reason. And then further up the room, all the walls are pretty much bare around. There's nothing on the walls.

And on that side, on the right side, there's, it's a dust collector, but it is actually a bike. You know, electric bike machine thing. Exercise bike.

It's a Reebok. It's quite a good one. I've had it for a long time.

Many, many, many, many, many, many years. And, yeah, never really used it. Next to that is a, it's like another punch bag, but it's like a punch ball.

So, again, it's got water base, so it stays upright. It's more for speed. It's not a speed ball that you like have against the wall.

This is more, I don't know, it comes back at you, so you can dodge out of the way and stuff. What else? Then there's the window. One of the good things about this flat is the windows are big.

You know, for the size of the rooms, they're decent sized rooms. The window's quite big. Still got the same curtains as I had when I moved in.

I know. Lazy. I'm so lazy.

That window is actually cleaned, but the birds have decided they didn't like it being cleaned on the outside. And on the inside, that's where Vinnie gets onto the windowsill. It's quite a wide windowsill, and he's left smudges all over the window.

The top window's always open. Not always open, but when I'm in and stuff. So, it's open now, because I like to try and get some air in there, as I do with the living room.

I can't open the side windows here, because if Vinnie gets onto the windowsill, I just don't want him jumping out. So, I keep the side windows, because there's two big side windows, another middle one, and then one at the top. The two side and the one at the top open.

I leave the ones at the side closed. I used to open them, but since I've had him, I don't. So, that's the curtains, the curtain rail.

To the left, to the left, to the left, there are two clothes racks. Now, these are attached to the wall. Well, one's attached to the wall, the one's falling off the wall.

Vinnie, no barkies, please. So, I can't really put anything on that one, and the other one's wonky. So, I've got t-shirts and stuff like that on there.

They're very good, but I just didn't do a very good job of putting them on there. And then, next to the punch bag thing, punch ball rather, there's a scales. So, what do I weigh today? What do I weigh today? Ooh, about, probably about, what is it, what is it? What is it? Just under 15.

I'd say, I would say probably about 90, 94 pound, 94 kilos, maybe, something like that. And then, in front of that, there's a chair. It's a brown chair.

I do like KFC. I used to, back in, ooh, 2011, I lived in this room where there was no, I had no food, but I didn't have a TV. There was a shared kitchen, but I just didn't like sharing anymore.

I just had enough of sharing, sharing fridges, just for whatever reason. And I didn't like cooking down there. So, I didn't cook for a year.

What I did is I got sandwiches. I ate out, because I was counselling. That was my job at the time.

So, I was a counsellor. I'd eat out, maybe get something hot during the day, and then buy Greg's sandwiches for the evening. And I'd do that six days a week.

And then, on a Sunday, I would, I think I might have some sandwiches left over for Sunday, but Sunday, I would get a KFC on a Sunday afternoon. And I would, like a huge, huge amount, and just pig out. It was, that was my normal Sunday ritual.

Yeah, I was making videos back then as well, and making recordings. I think not having a TV was a real, it helped with my distraction, or helped to not distract me. Yeah, I still watched a few bits, like box sets and stuff online.

I downloaded, because the internet was so slow. I couldn't actually stream anything, because it was shared amongst, it didn't really reach my flat, my room rather. What are you doing? Okay, wait a minute.

There you go. Alright, he's trying to get, you want me to put my socks on? He wants me to put my socks on, so I, what is it you want? He's very devious, but very clever as well. You want me to put them on? He wants me to put my socks on, and I'm going to whisper why.

So I take him for a walk. He wants me to put my socks on for that. He might have heard ARCHY walking past, and this is around the time that they normally do.

We're not going out, I'm doing a recording. I'm doing a recording, and what have I got to have a break in and come back and do the rest of the recording? Is that what we've got to do? Wow. I suppose I could just have a break in and continue.

Just quickly, so there's a brown chair in front of me. There's a weight desk, like a weight table thing, you know what you can do? A weight bench, that's it. I've got a couple of barbells, and I've got a, this is going to be funny to say this out loud, but I've got a sit-up bench as well, which I've had for years.

And also got another exercise thing, which is like a push-in exercise thing for chest and back. And then, if I turn around to the left, there is a bed. A bed.

My double bed with my superhero Marvel bedspread and cushions or pillows. There's, the wall is worn out on one end, because I suppose I've been leaning against it. And there's a plug.

It's a weird place to put a plug. A plug right there. And kind of, yeah, I've bashed on it a few times.

Bashed on it, I've banged it a few times. No, I'm trying to think of a good word. It's, yeah, it's there.

Sometimes I catch on it. And then, next to the double bed is my set of drawers. There's four set of drawers.

Brown. I don't even know where that came from. I think I got that from second-hand shop.

Yeah, charity shop gave me that. And a wardrobe. I got rid of the wardrobe eventually.

I've got some socks on there. So, bits of food for him. Just a few bits and bobs.

Nothing much. A few bits on the floor that are probably going to stay there for a few years. On the bed, so, if you face, like if I'm sort of standing at the bottom of the bed looking up at the head, not the head stone, the head thingy.

On the right-hand side, that's where I sleep. The left-hand side is where Vinnie sleeps. He sleeps on the pillow, or he sleeps sort of further down the bed, or sometimes he cuddles up to me in the middle of the bed.

Sometimes he will sleep on my legs, or he will sleep the other side of the bed. You know, sort of, he likes to be on top of the duvet. Or sometimes, if he can, underneath the duvet.

Don't you? Yes. I wonder if he thinks I'm talking to him the whole time. But he knows not to go on my pillow.

Don't you? Yeah, I could just say you don't know what I do when you're not around. Okay, stop that. So now I'm going to come out.

I do like Indian food. I'll tell you my favourite Indian meal. And it's a vegetable, vegetarian, well not vegetarian, but vegetable curry.

Because I like the potatoes. But it has to be mild. Very mild.

I do also like Wendy's burgers and Five Guys. But unfortunately, when they deliver, the drinks tip over. So I can't get deliveries from them anymore.

Five Guys burgers are too big as well. But Wendy's are nice. I prefer the Wendy's burgers.

I would prefer the Five Guys milkshake because it's got, it's just, wow, amazing. Other than that, Chinese food. Chicken omelette and chips.

That's nice. Or just a plain omelette and chips. That's my favourite Chinese meal.

So as I go out the bedroom door, turn left. And then turn left again. That's the, this is the living room.

This is where I really do spend most of my time. It's going to take me about 10 hours to even read, to tell you what's in here. Because I can't go through everything because it's too messy.

I didn't mention the radiators, did I? So there's a radiator. I'm getting excited about radiators. There's a radiator near the front door.

There's a radiator under the window in the bedroom. It's a very long radiator. There is another radiator underneath the, I think it's, is it the same length or is it? No, this one's shorter.

So the one in the living room is shorter. So I think the living room, I think the bedroom might be a larger room. Same kind of windows in the living room.

But as we go in, as you turn left, there's my desk. I've got two desks. Two, I don't know what you want to call them.

I suppose officially they're gamer desks, but I don't, don't play games. I'm a very serious individual. But they, they seem quite good for setting up the equipment.

So I've got a lamp on the left hand side, but that's one that can plug into the C, into the, I don't know where it plugs into. A kind of lamp, you know, for doing videos. I've got a pile of hypnosis books and some letters on top of there.

I have, this is, so if I'm facing the two tables set together, there is my TV on top and it's quite big. I got it quite a few years ago. I paid for it over time.

It was probably the only, the only thing I've actually paid for that was for me, like just for my own little self indulgence. The rest of it's been equipment for doing this stuff really. Laptops and recording stuff.

And I will not consider the, I will not consider any exercise equipment as being for fun. Sorry, I won't. So on the desk there's recording equipment on the left hand side.

There is headphones, another set of headphones. There is my, a bottle of water with the lid on, of course, always. Not always because I won't be able to get the water out, but you know, when it's not being used.

There's my laptop, which is what I use for research and all, most of the stuff I do. Next to that there is an iPad, which is what I do to edit the audio, which I'll be doing to edit this. And then there are two adapters.

Oh, there's also a hard drive there. Okay, so that's the hard drive, but that's nearly full. So I'm going to have to sort that out.

I've just got so many recordings now. And there's another adapter, which is what I put the disc in. So when I use the other recording, the normal recording equipment that I would normally use with the microphone, I, what do I do? Yeah, there's a disc, SD card, and I put it in there and then I transfer it.

And yeah, so I do that. Next to that, there's a couple of wireless mics, one wireless microphone, which I can't get to work. Then there's the Sky TV adapter thing that I've had for forever, which is kind of just, you just buy it and then you can get, I don't get, I get access just to, it gives me access to the apps for all the different apps.

And then like Netflix and Sky, like Now TV and things like that. And then I have to pay individually for each one if I use them. So just, it's just like a Roku or, you know, a lot of TVs come with all that included now anyway.

So I used to have it in my other TV. Next to that, I've got two, two adapter like plugs that are on the end of the desk. They're kind of screwed in, not like attached anyway, you know, by hand, hand screwed or whatever.

They've got like a device at the bottom. There's three plugs in each. There's also two USB attachments as well on each.

So that's quite good because that means it allows me to, to power everything on this desk. Although there is a bit of wiring, which is a bit annoying sometimes. I'm trying to think what other favorite foods I have.

I like, I tell you something I haven't had for a long time is a, ooh, what is it? Pancakes. Love pancakes. One of my favorite things I used to like, I used to like to go to the Wimpy when I used to go into town.

That used to be like a once a week thing I used to quite like. I'd feel full up at the end of it, but it was still just nice to like a nice little treat. Another thing I used to like to go into this place, which used to do cooked breakfasts.

And what I would have is, I wouldn't have a fully cooked breakfast. One place I would, but the other place I'd have an omelette, chips and beans, two slices of bread and I think a can of Coke. Again, you know, I don't drink Coke anymore, but those were the days.

You got me hungry now. Stop it. Why'd you do that? I do like barbecue food as well, but I'm not into chops or anything like that.

I just like, yeah, barbecued as long as there's no flies around. And the stuff's cooked and the stuff the person cooking on the barbecue is not using the same equipment for the raw meat as for the cooked meat. I just can't, I just can't handle that.

It's just, yeah, it's weird, isn't it? I don't really. I like to think that I don't really learn very much, but when I went to catering college, I must have really absorbed, you know, a couple of those rules, hygiene rules, you know, always keep your hands clean, always make sure the raw meats at the bottom of the fridge, never put it above cooked meat or any other kind of cooked food in the fridge, which a lot of people don't know.

Trust me, I've done some research.

The other one is never try to catch a knife, unless of course you're in a circus and you literally are chucking knives at each other, then it's different. But if you're doing a washing up, you drop a knife under normal circumstances, you know, of course, there, you know, depend as long as no one else around underneath the sink or whatever, but just generally. Or if it drops in the sink, don't, you know, don't try and catch it just so it doesn't splash in your face because, yeah, that happened to me a few times and I ended up with some cuts.

What's the other things? Don't, yeah, don't rub dog poo in open wounds. That's another one. Yes, it is certain things, but you don't use the same utilities, not utilities, you don't like the same spatula that you're turning around or prongs you turn around cook food.

Because, you know, with burgers, once they've been on the grill for a little while or the barbecue, they kind of cooked on the outside. So if you keep start moving the ones that aren't cooked now, that's just my personal preference. I know with things like beef, you know, you can kind of get away with it probably, but I don't.

And also, I was at this person's house and they did a barbecue. I wasn't invited to the barbecue, but I was invited to go in afterwards. So I went around and they said, Oh, do you want a burger? We've got some stuff left.

I said, okay, pulled the lid up and about a thousand flies flew out. And I said, no, you're right. Yeah, I think I'll give that a miss.

I forgot this. I've got another one of my little signs on the wall in the hallway next to the bathroom because I've not really got, I'll read it when I get out because I've not gone that far have I? So I've got some, I've got another sign above the window. Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit.

And you are what you do repeatedly. And if I turn around, this sign's been up there for about 10 years. I deserve to be happy.

And that's on the door, like just the door frame. Ooh, got a few clothes hanging on the curtain rod. There's windowsill, a few bits and bobs on the internet routers on there.

And then if you move over to the other side of, Oh, I've got one of those bendy, um, chest shoulder exercise things that you can do. Got one of them standing there. I've got multiple soundproofing from all the way around, all the way around the next wall and pretty much covering the whole of those two walls.

And I've also got soundproofing behind the television, behind the TV and the tables all the way behind there and to the right. And I've got another strip of soundproofing just on the left hand side near the door. And there is some soundproofing, I do believe.

Right. There's some soundproofing on the back of the door as well. So when that's closed, that's also got soundproofing on.

So I really kind of went to town with this room. There's a light. Yeah, there's a light, which is, it's kind of, um, like for video lighting, really.

So I've got two of those, one in the corner and one on the other side of the room near the, the light switch near the door. I do have another one, but I think it's in the storage room or maybe in my neighbor's got it. Um, I've got another sign here, which says you do nothing, you get nothing.

Okay, cool. That's nice. I've got another sign over here near the TV, which says the best way to fail is to try to please everyone.

And that was from Buddy Holly, apparently. So there's no other signs in this. Oh, there's another one.

I've got a thing from Lydia here, lifeline of a podcast. I've always struggled to sleep and find myself staring into the void on a regular basis. I first found these on Spotify, but I'm so happy I migrated to the website where so many more goodies can be found.

Ever since listening to the podcast, I fall asleep so much easier. And even though I still wake often, I find it much simpler to fall back to dreamland and cannot thank Jason enough for these sleep sessions. You are amazing, Lydia.

Thank you. That's from about five, six years ago. I think that was like 2019.

So I've got my settee. It's a big old thing. It's a two seater, but it's a recliner.

My friend downstairs gave it to me. Heavy, proper heavy. And on the left hand side is a table, which my neighbor's given me some cakes and chocolates and biscuits to celebrate a religious festival they're doing.

So that's cool. I said, when's the next one? He said in to be years times. I said, I'll see you in a year then.

Give me more biscuits and cakes. That could be the way to peace between different faiths. Give each other cakes and biscuits and chocolates.

Riviel asks me. Can you describe the building you like? I'm doing it now. Sorry, I forgot.

So this is what I'm doing. And Ben asks me, what do you find boring? Oh, I don't think anyone's ever asked me that one before. Maybe they have.

That question. What and has your new money thing sorted now? And besides boxing, what's your favorite sport or something that you like? Well, first of all, the money thing is. It seems to be sorted now.

I think I'm a little bit confused, but it's all new new payment dates. So I'm just kind of taking my time with it. But it's been I'll be I'll be completely honest.

The people I've dealt with with the benefits place. They've been lovely. Everyone I've done.

Anyone that I've dealt with has been very polite and friendly on the phone. And so, yeah, I can't fault them. And they haven't looked like they're trying to.

Cause problems or anything like that. And I don't know, I've just had a good experience with them. So that's kind of sorted.

It's just it's they've allowed me to have my rent paid directly to the council. The housing place. They've also agreed to pay me every two weeks instead of once a month.

So that's, you know. It's just, yeah, I've got to be careful. Just once once.

After a couple of months, I'll get used to the new the new routine as it were. What do I what's the other one at the bottom? Besides, besides boxing, what's your favorite sport or something that you like? OK, I don't I'm not interested in any other sports. What other things do I like? Keep it PG rated.

So, yeah, I think. Boxing's the only sport I like, but I do. I do enjoy watching a good movie.

I love superhero movies, even the ones that don't get good reviews. I watch and I will continue to watch every single superhero movie that ever gets released. Simply because I am dedicated to it.

And I have pretty much done that since I was a little kid. You know, I'm not I'm not new on the wagon as it were. I'm not new on the little horse of superhero movies that have been around.

For the last 15 years or whatever it is. Because Marvel kind of came to. They started like making so many, didn't they? Once they did Thor and then suddenly there's so many.

But yeah, I've. Yeah, for the last. Since I was seven, I've loved superhero movies.

I'm old school. Literally old. But I do, so I don't have any favorite sports.

I suppose if I was going to. If you took away boxing. If you took away professional boxing, I would watch amateur boxing.

If you took away amateur boxing. I would wear I would watch bare knuckle boxing. You know, if everything if that was taken.

I don't really like bare knuckle boxing. It's just a little bit too gruesome for me. I don't know.

I kind of like it, but I don't. I kind of like it a little bit too much. You know, I've watched it and it's just like.

That's real fighting. Like real stand up fighting. Then you go to UFC and MMA.

And then that's even realer. In a sense of. Just wow.

But at the same time, I don't. I don't enjoy watching the grappling. I've got an appreciation for it.

And the jujitsu is amazing. It's phenomenal. It really is.

Got a lot of respect for anyone that could do that. I just. I don't find it.

Exciting to watch. But I do find it when they're in the cage and they're punching and kicking. Yeah.

That was in the 90s. They used to be conversations. People would be in a pub.

Well, I was in a pub once having this conversation. I don't know if anyone else in the world was. Who would win between Muhammad Ali and Bruce Lee.

In a street fight. And it's pretty much. Accepted that.

Bruce Lee would win in a street fight. In a ring. It would depend.

Would Bruce Lee be allowed to kick? If Bruce Lee would be allowed to kick then he would also win in a ring. Because Muhammad Ali wouldn't get anywhere close to him. Wouldn't get near him.

Which was shown because Muhammad Ali. God I keep saying Muhammad Ali. Ali.

This I'll not tell you badly. You probably know this but. For those that may not know.

Ali actually got in a ring with. A martial artist. And this person kicked him in the legs.

Continuously. I think it might have been a kickboxer. Like world champion kickboxer or something.

And he completely ruined. Ali's legs. Really really smashed his legs up bad.

So. I've seen clips of it on YouTube. And yeah I think it put him out of action for a while.

He also got in a ring with a wrestler. And the wrestler. The wrestler just chucked him all around the ring.

It's weird. It's like different styles. Because I don't think.

I'm not sure if he was allowed to punch the wrestler. What are you going to do if you're a boxer. You can't punch.

You're kind of limited aren't you. But in a boxing ring. Ali against Bruce Lee.

Half and a factor. Very different weights. Ali wasn't a heavy heavyweight.

He was what. 14 stone or something. Bruce Lee was probably.

12 stone. 13 stone. 12.

So there wasn't a lot of difference really. There was quite a bit in that I suppose. Bruce Lee did have speed.

But then Muhammad Ali was the fastest boxer. Of his generation. So.

In boxing. Ali would have won. I would say.

I know that's not the question you asked. Should we talk about my bookcases. So I can move on.

OK. Behind the settee. It's a black settee.

That reclines. One side on the right hand side. You might have seen this in some videos.

There's just a bunch of junk on there. Pad. There's a. A couple of singles in it.

From last weekend. There's some spectacle wipes. There's the remote controls.

There's a book. For my. Ideas.

That I've got there. Right. I won't read that one out because it's rude.

That needs to be changed. So I've got to just write down some things. That I find funny and just.

Just leave them. And on the left hand side is where I sit. And where Vinnie sits when I'm not sitting down.

So I often get to sit into a warm seat. When I actually do sit there. He often.

I mean sometimes he doesn't. But he will. Cozy up to me and cuddle up to my leg.

And. Just like when I put my hand on him. And just stroke him.

And just stay like that for a few hours sometimes. Go to sleep. There's a little side table.

I think I mentioned that there's biscuits on there. And an empty cup. And an empty bowl.

Breakfast bowl. And then. Next to that there are three bookcases.

Three. With. Most of my books.

So there's the black bookcases. There's stuff on top as well. There's a hard drive.

I think that's where my videos are. From years ago. There's a few bits and bobs.

There's a microphone. Some books. More books.

A picture of my Nan and me. There's Andre's ashes. There's a rock that a friend brought back from Wales.

Some other bits and bobs. There's a picture from the comedy club. Which I'm going to get on the wall.

That my friend gave to me the night the place closed. There's also a running machine. Another dust collector.

And then there's a vacuum cleaner. The running machine is a cheap old thing that I got in a sale. A couple of years back.

And it's. I'm not even sure it can really hold my weight. Oh my chair.

I've got a chair. It's a gaming chair. And it's half fallen apart now.

Which is fine. And I've got one of those. It's a. I don't know what you want to call it.

Something that people with piles and hemorrhoids sit on. But it's comfortable. But I get it.

So that it kind of strength. Straightens my back. My lower back.

So I get I've got that. So not to make myself taller. Just.

I can't reach my feet to the ground when I'm sitting on it. But no it's just to. You know.

Try and keep me in my posture a bit better. What do I find boring. Er.

What do I find boring. I don't know. What bores me.

I don't know really. Sometimes. Negativity can bore me.

I know I can be. I can be negative at times. But sometimes you know when.

Someone's just moaning the whole time. And that can get a bit much. I get bored with that or.

Repetition. I find can be boring. And I know that I also do that.

I'm a bit repetitious. But. Probably and this is going to sound bad.

I've got a neighbor that talks about sport all the time. Football. And when he comes.

He actually knocks on my door to talk about football sometimes. And I have to tell him no. I just said no.

No no. My neighbor wants to talk about football. And I said no.

No no. He said no. And I do feel a bit bad.

But I've been very honest with him. Like. I can't talk about something I've no interest in.

And he can talk for hours about it. Because he's knowledgeable about it. Also.

He's knowledgeable about politics. I only found out. Like the other day.

He spends all day listening to Parliament. Like all day long. He's listening.

So he's really. I mean he's got a degree in politics. So it's something he's interested in.

I can't. It's hard to have a conversation with someone. That knows every single politician's name.

And are really into all that. You know it's like. And I think am I like that with boxing with people.

Because I don't have. If I talk to anyone about boxing. If I talk to him about boxing.

He can hold a conversation. Bare minimum. You know he knows what's going on in boxing.

Generally like the big fights. But he you know. He uses it.

As a way to get back to football. So for example. If there's a fight.

Let's say there's a fight coming on. Fabio Wardley's fighting this weekend. He's fighting at the Ipswich football stadium.

Guaranteed if I mention Fabio Wardley. He'll start talking about Ipswich football. Or in fact we've had that conversation.

Telling me how well they're doing in the league. Or how well they're not doing. I don't care.

It bores me. It really bores me. Because I'm just not interested.

And. I can't. It doesn't.

Football doesn't bore me. That football bores me. Does that make sense? Football is a great game.

And I know that I'm outnumbered. By billions of people. The same with cricket.

Rugby. Golf. Millions of people love golf.

Motocross racing or whatever it's called. I'm in the minority. I know that.

Because I'm not into any of those sports. Tennis. Darts.

Snooker. Snooker. I'm not into those things.

But I've got nothing against them. They're brilliant. They let people have fun and enjoy what they enjoy.

I can't talk about them though. And especially when I can't contribute. It means that I'm just sat there.

Or stood there listening. And if I'm not talking. That turns into a conversation.

Or it's like. No. I want to be doing the talking.

It's got to be about me. Me. Vinnie's sitting at the door.

His little. One of his neighbours knocked on the door for him. I think.

I wonder if they're still there. Hopefully not. So.

The last question. Michelle. If you were a superhero.

What would be your superpower. Or powers. And because knowing you.

Is bound to be funny. Please describe your costume. And your hero name.

Hearing you sing the hero song. In my head right now. Shall we do it.

There's a hero. If you look inside your pants. Erm.

Michelle. I think. I do think about.

I did read. I did read through these. Yesterday or.

Maybe. And I did have an idea. Of a superhero.

But I've forgotten what it is now. I know what superhero is. But I can't remember.

Let's do a tour of the kitchen while I think. Right. So this this is the living room.

So that's all that done. Come out of the living room. The.

Opposite the room. The living room door room. Is another.

Post. Or another that I've put up from years ago. I find your podcast really helpful.

Hi Jason. I've been listening to you on Spotify. Since 19.

2019. Erm. Had a medical condition.

And left me with. A lot of problems. I find your podcast really helpful.

Vicky. So thank you. So that was.

Maybe that was 2020. I got that one. I had loads.

I wonder where they all went. Where did they all go to. Right.

So now I'm turning left. It's another door. Looks the same as all the other doors.

Sometimes I get confused. This one might be a bit more echoey. But I'm sure the bathroom will be.

Even more echoey than that. The first thing I see. You coming in.

You coming in. Come on then. Right.

You don't then. There is. A fridge.

And a freezer. The fridge is on top of the counter. The freezer is underneath the counter.

It's been that way. Since I've moved in. The council did say.

That I could remove part of the counter. And put a fridge freezer in. Once I've been here a year.

But I never bothered. There's a few bits in there. In the fridge.

Oh dear. One. Two.

Three. Four. Five.

Six. Six litres of milk. Like individual litres of.

Semi skimmed Cravendale milk. I've got a delivery today. I've got some.

Sliced buns. Belgian buns. I've got some sliced meat.

I've got some. Bertoli. Spread.

A couple of. Dairy milk flake. Desserts.

I'm just going to point out. It's boxing tomorrow. And on Sunday.

So that's for then. Just for the weekend. A nice little weekend treat.

I don't have stuff like that during the week. Maybe. I've also got a bar of chocolate.

And a packet of. Chocolate biscuits. Okay.

That's. On top. I have a few bits and bobs.

There's a carton of. Juice. That's open.

There's probably about three or four left in there. There's a frying pan. And another tub.

Empty plastic tub. To the right of that is a microwave. Which I do use every day.

For. Heating. The milk for my ready brick.

I kind of think that maybe. I'm not sure about the super costume. But.

I quite like to be the superhero that. Enforces the law. And I might be weird.

Because technically that's a police person. Isn't it? But I don't mean like serious laws. Just trivial laws that are really annoying.

Like people that park on the pavement. Or. People that park on the pavement.

Or people that park on the pavement. That's it. That's one of my little things.

People that bid their horn when they don't need to. Things like that. So.

So let's. Let's say someone's. Or someone that's speeding.

So they're speeding. And. I could just stop it.

With my mind. And lift it up. And send the van to the moon.

Something like that. Something harmless like that. What else? I mean I had an idea.

This is when I was like in my 20s. To have some kind of attachment to a car. So when I was on a motorway.

If any car went over the speed limit. It just blew up. But it was pointed out.

That would be quite dangerous. So okay. I was only.

I was about 22. 23 at the time. Erm.

I've got a couple of units in here. One above the microwave. Which has got.

There's a tin of beads. Some Vaseline. I don't even know why that's in there.

I don't eat Vaseline. Got a tuna fish thing. Another thing.

I can't see it. It's too high up. I can't actually see what's in there.

Some plastic bags. I've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. 1, 2, 3. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. 7. Protein drinks. So they're probably out of date.

No. Another 2 at the bottom. Some more plastic bags.

Which you can. You know the little plastic. Bags.

I don't know how else to say it. That you put stuff in. Which is generally what you do with all bags.

Isn't it? Urgh. Like. Okay.

When I open. A. When I open something. And I'm only going to eat half of it.

I might put it into. I might cover it with a bag. Yeah.

As an example. So that's it. They're not big.

But they kind of do the job. I've got 2 tins of 4 packs of. 200 grams.

Heinz beans. Yeah. That's good.

Then I've got. On my cooker. Which I don't really use.

I've got a Ninja. Not a Ninja Ninja. But a. What are those.

Quick cooker things. Not pressure cookers. Fry cook.

Cooker fry. Frying cookers. Cooker fry things.

Cooker fryers. Quick fryers. Quick fryers.

Frying cooker. One of them things. Really good.

I got it recommended by a friend. And I was surprised at how good it is. It's really.

It's the only thing I use now. Really. Not the only thing I use in the world.

I've got. Another cupboard. On the right hand side.

Which is above the. Unit. And there's some.

Rice packets. Gravy packets. Tea bags.

Breakfast cereal. That's opened. That's at the bottom.

And packet of biscuits. And a couple of packets of rolls. Which I got today.

On top of that cupboard. There is one. Two.

Three. Four. Five.

Six boxes of cereal. One ready brick. One cornflakes.

Two shredded wheat. Minis. And two Quaker oats.

On the counter. It'd be good to be able to stop time. Wouldn't it? Just stop time.

And just be able to just. Not to mess with people. But just.

Because in this. You know. If you watch The Flash.

And. Okay. It might be a different movie to what you're thinking.

But it's. It's. No.

It's a superhero movie. If you watch The Flash. He stopped.

It goes so fast. It almost looks like he's. Stopped time.

Which in a sense. He kind of has. And also.

Silver. From the X-Men. Silver.

Silver Beard Streak. Whatever his name is. Silver.

I preferred him actually. There's a scene. In one of the X-Men movies.

One of the more recent ones. Although the recent ones were a long time ago. Where he's breaking.

Magneto out of prison. So good. He's got.

He puts his headphones on. Listen to the music. And.

It's really. Such a great scene. Underneath the cabinet.

I've got my. Toaster. Then there's a kettle.

So I use a kettle. A few times a day. I probably have.

One. Two. Three.

Four. Five. Five cups of tea a day probably.

Then I've got a few bits of rubbish. On the left hand. Just next to that.

Just packaging really. That needs to be chucked out. Just minimal.

It's not a lot. I don't let it build up. And then I've got a windowsill.

With a window. The blind got broken. When the.

Workman came. And fixed the window. So I can't open the blind anymore.

The blind's been there since I moved in. My dad put it in. And it's just broken.

It wasn't doing much. I think it was like. Halfway there anyway.

So yeah. I never open the blind. So the window.

Pretty much stays closed as well. But it's okay. During the day.

Don't need the light on. Because there's enough light coming through. But at night time.

I need the light on. Then I wouldn't have the blind. Open anyway.

If it was night. I don't want people watching me. Doing a washing up.

I want people getting excited. Things like that. A bunch of cups.

I've only really got one mug. That I use. I've got two dishes.

Two breakfast dishes. Two forks. One knife.

Two spoons. One plate. That's what I've got.

I do have a saucepan. But it's on top. It's on top of the toilet.

Because I use it to. Pour some water. Somewhere.

I've got some washing up liquid. I've got some light. In colour olive oil.

And also some Mr Muscle. Cleaner thing. Which this sink.

Could really do with. Then on the right hand side. There's the boiler on the wall.

Underneath that. There's a. To be. I was going to say.

It's messy. Because I haven't put these documents away. Well it's lucky I didn't.

Because I needed them the other day. So good for me. I needed to show.

I needed to prove ID. Of who I was. And where I previously lived.

And I have that information. On this documents. Because I'd forgotten.

My last address. I don't remember. I remember the road.

I don't remember what road. What number it was. Well I do now.

Because. I recently looked it up. So yeah.

But you know. I didn't before that. There's two cupboards.

One's underneath the sink. One's underneath. The other side of the cupboard.

Where the. Right next to the oven. I don't open either.

Those cupboards. Because that's where the. Vermin used to come in.

So I kind of just. Sealed those closed. But I do use a drawer.

Above the. The one. That's below.

Just next to the. On the right hand side. Of the oven.

Near the cooker. Near the. The.

The kettle. And that's where I keep my medication. So loads of medications.

In there. So I've got. You know.

All this medication I take. Fluoxetine. Gastro resistant.

Sodium. Valproate. I've got.

Cocodobol. And. The ones I take.

From my stomach. In the other drawer. Which is below.

The. Microwave. Is.

There's just. Basically. Letters.

They're just letters. And a few bits and bobs. Just.

Stuff. You know. Just stuff.

That just ends up there. You know. Batteries.

And. Pens. And stuff like that.

Then. To the right. Well just under.

Kind of the draining board. There is my washing machine. Which is actually full right now.

Ready to be emptied. To be. Hung up.

Had that since I've moved in. That's been a very faithful. Washing machine.

To the right of me. Next to. The.

Boiler. Is. A. There's a rack.

Like a towel rack. Above the radiator. I don't have the radiator on.

In the kitchen. I rarely. I'm rarely in the kitchen.

The. There's a big board. A big white board.

Where. The last time. I wrote all this stuff down.

I couldn't. It was. Removable ink.

But it's been on there so long. It's on there forever. And.

That's. Back when. Electric and gas was.

£40 a month. So we're going back a while. I'm pretty.

You could. Yeah. £40 a month.

For electric and gas. Where. Yeah.

That's a long. Long. Long time ago.

February the 3rd. February. I could work it out from.

What year it was from this. So it's February the 3rd. And it was a Wednesday.

So look it up. To see. Mind you.

There's probably quite a few February the 3rd Wednesday. You never know. It might.

Might not be. And then to the right. There's a freezer.

It's one of those ones. With a lid at the top. That's where I keep.

All the frozen stuff that I use. The freezer. Underneath the fridge.

I don't really use. It's just there. Just don't really use it.

It's. It's just. A lot of bending down.

And my back. Don't like it. I've got.

A bunch of stuff. On top of the lid. Because if there's a flat surface.

I have to have stuff on there. And when Andre was around. He had to knock stuff off the flat surface.

It was a. Give and take situation. There's some eggs that need to be chucked out. Two bottles that need to be chucked out.

There's two bottles of water that are full. That are. Still in a packet.

Ready to be. Eaten. Drink.

Drunk rather. There's a tomato ketchup. Unopened bottle.

Which is. Comes from groceries. One.

Two. Three. Four tins of dog food.

A bag of treats. For Vinnie as well. Sure sounds.

Sound like someone's banging on a door. Don't know where that was. I tell you what would be quite cool.

If you ever seen The Watchmen. There's. A superhero there.

That pretty much. Can do anything. He can do.

He can be anywhere. It can be. Thousands of places.

All at the same time. He's that omnipotent. Isn't it.

And. Basically. He can destroy worlds.

Or build worlds. I don't want to destroy worlds. But.

Just. That kind of power. I don't want much though.

I just want. The power. Of all.

All the power there is. Because in Superman 4. I know I said that I. I love superhero movies. But that was awful.

Even by my standards that was. My standards in the early 80s. Was not high.

You know. The standards of movies back then. Wasn't.

Always great. But I didn't even. I didn't like that movie.

But there was one good bit where. Superman decides to get rid of. All nuclear weapons.

I like that. So. It's kind of.

To me that would be like. Taking away. The children's toys.

Your children are arguing. Take their toys away. And then they can't.

Hurt each other anymore. And it would be a little bit like that. It's just like.

Okay. If I was. Super.

I mean Superman really is. The strongest. Bestest.

Superhero really. Kind of. Pretty much.

Yeah. He's. Yeah.

I think Superman. But. You know.

I'd like to have my own. Identity. But I did realize the other day.

When I was. I did mention it that. People do look different.

In a costume. You know. The idea of the old.

Clark Kent. Takes his glasses off. Everyone's going to know.

It's Superman. They wouldn't. In reality.

They wouldn't. I remember when my dad. When I was eight years old.

My dad came downstairs. He'd shaved his beard off. We're talking.

A big beard. It's great. The sides.

Of the house. Like the walls. Like when he walked down the stairs.

It. Yeah. It's really big.

Big beard. Shaved it off. We didn't even notice.

That's probably not a good example. Is it? It would have been a better example. If I said he shaved it off.

And we didn't recognize him. That would have been a better example. No.

I'll take that example back. It did happen. But.

We knew it was him. Because he just came out of the bathroom. Who else is it going to be? He went into the bathroom.

Daddy. And he came out of the bathroom. He's not going to come out a different person.

Although that could be confusing. For Superman's kids. Goes in one room.

Comes out another room. In a spandex suit. So yeah.

I'm in the kitchen by the way. It's very echoey in here probably. Nearly two hours I've been yapping.

Two hours. Again. I'm sorry about the sound quality.

If it's really bad. If it's okay. I might just do more like this.

Because this is. This is more fun than just sitting there. To be honest.

On a nice day. I could take you for a walk in the field. If it's not windy.

And just have a chat. Yeah. I prefer that.

I need a longer lead though. And perhaps get a. I don't know. We'll see.

So this is. If I come out. Of the living room.

I try and stop the door from slamming. I don't know where Vinnie is. Vinnie's in the bedroom.

He's on the bed. So turn left. This is in the kitchen.

There's people out the front. So. You might hear them.

So he's in the bathroom. Did I say the kitchen? This is the bathroom. So turn left.

There is. A big mirror. And I can kind of see.

My head. I'm not going to go through everybody part. I can see in the mirror.

We know how mirrors work. But I can see. You know my legs and stuff.

I can see the important bits. The bits I can't see without a mirror. If you know what I mean.

Open it up. I look inside here. There's a cupboard.

There's a cupboard. That's what I'm looking inside. In case you wonder.

Wait a minute. You stand in front of the mirror. And now you're looking inside.

What were you looking inside? We just. No this is a cupboard. Nothing weird.

There is. Two big packs of toilet paper. With.

Twelve rolls. And another one. With twelve.

Sixteen pack. But I think there's like. Four left.

Four out. So I've probably got another twelve in there. There's tins of dog food.

That Vinnie don't like. There is. Some.

Recycling bags. There's one, two, three shelves. One shelf is broken.

There's a lot of room. If that was taken out. This whole.

Bathroom would be a lot bigger. But what would I do with the space? It's not really much. You know what? I could put a little seat there.

Read. I mean I don't know. I suppose I could put a TV.

I could put a TV in it. Opposite the toilet. Couldn't I? Anyway.

And there's some. Bags at the bottom. So if I turn left.

Walk in. Turn left again. There's a bit of a dip.

So there's the toilet roll holder. We all do it. Come on.

Don't be all shy. I can't believe he's talking about toilet rolls. Toilet.

You know. There's a hook. For my.

I don't know. Dressing gown I guess. I used to put my dressing gown in there.

But my friend had both my dressing gowns. The same way he had both my. Both my coats.

And I never got them. I don't have a dressing gown anymore. I need to get one.

So. Above the toilet roll holder. I have something that I wrote about 10 years ago.

In ink. Life is a big marker pen. Life is for loving.

Okay. I've not really lived up to that. To the right hand side of me.

So opposite the toilet. Opposite the toilet roll holder. The toilet is there.

I don't know if I need to describe the toilet. Other than. Urgh.

But to the left. To the left. To the left.

Everybody stand to the left. There is my. Bathroom unit.

With two mirrors. And on top of it. There's some toilet cleaner.

A packet of. Soaps. I knew.

I knew. One's missing. So there's four soaps.

One has been used. The dove. There's a Colgate called stripe.

Unused. Toothpaste. There's two packs of Nivea.

Face cleaning wipes. Oops. Inside.

Inside. The. Cupboard.

There is. A thing called fat face. I don't know what that is.

For. I'm not even sure what it is. There's a thermometer.

There's an. An old. An old toothbrush.

I don't know why that's still there. There's a new toothbrush. It's on.

Unused. I'm still in the pack. There is.

My toothpaste that I use. With a toothpaste. That nearly empty next to it.

I don't know if I want to. Want to look at this tube. I don't know what's in it.

And. OK. And.

Germinoids. Cream. Xenic oxide.

Local anesthetic pain relief. Shrinks pile. I don't know why that's in there.

I don't know. Oh my God. And.

And then there's lactose. Oral solution. That's for constipation.

Wow. So there's constipation liquid. And pile cream.

That must have been there for someone else. And there's some tweezers. And some nail clippers as well.

And then underneath. There's a towel rack. Where my towel is.

And that's just above the heater. The radiator. The radiator hardly even comes on.

Needs fixing I think. And to the right. Above the toilet.

There's a. Extractor fan. That it can switch on. To get rid of the.

The damp. We don't have damp in this flat. So I'm very very grateful for that.

There's a couple of toilet brushes. There's. The window.

Which is open. At the top. On the window sill.

There's a thick bleach. One. Two.

Three. Four. Four empty toilet roll holders.

Or you know. Things. There's a Philips razor.

One blade razor. Electric razor thing. There's an empty.

Right guard. Deodorant. And there's a. Three quarts full.

Sure. For non-stop protection. Seventy two hours.

Which is good. So it means I only have to. Use it three times a week.

Twice a week. I've got a brush. Which I. I've got no use for really.

Because I don't. Don't have any hair anymore. I shave my head.

Not to the bone. But I shave it down. Once a week now.

Or twice a week. So it never gets. You know.

Whenever I trim my beard. I do my hair. So it all stays the same length now.

I've got electric toothbrush. That's broken. I don't know why.

I've still got that on the shelf. And I've got some braille cream. Which I really don't need.

For my hair do I? Below that I've got a sink. I've also got a. What is it? It's like a. What do you call it? Disability. It's like a disability.

Rack thing. Like that you can hold on to. For when I get out of the bath.

And there's another one. On the. I thought I had another one somewhere.

I've only got one. Where did the other one go? Maybe I never put it up. So that shows you how often.

I use the bath. But that's above the fridge. Above the sink.

To the left. To the left hand side of the bath. So in the bath.

I've got a shower rack. Shower rail rather. And a shower curtain.

There's a shower. That's. On the wall.

And a bath. So I use a shower. I don't have a bath anymore.

I just have a shower. I've got exfoliating. Daily wash.

Shampoo. There's some. Dog shampoo as well.

And there's soap as well. Dove soap. And I've got a scrubbing brush.

For my back. It's a big long one. Wooden.

And. So. That's where I can reach my back.

To clean my back. Scrub it. That's on the.

Other side of the bath. And there's tiles. All the way from the bath.

To the ceiling. They were there when I. When I moved in. There's a couple of.

What do you call them? Coat hangers. Wooden coat hangers. On the rails.

On the shower rail. Because. I cleaned my.

Pink crocs. And I had to hang them up there. For them to dry.

It doesn't take long to dry. But they just got completely. They were so wet.

And then. I do believe. That is everything.

I want to come out of there. Also. There's a nice.

Light in there. There's a light in. The kitchen.

In the bathroom. That I'm not allowed to change. Because it's.

The other one. Broke. And.

They've also got one in the kitchen. That I can't change either. So I have to get the electricians.

To come and change it. If it breaks down. That's the whole tour.

Of my home. I didn't show you my. I didn't show you my drawers.

Still in my set of drawers. Never mind. I'm going to sit down now.

I'm very tired. Superpowers. I'm a little bit greedy.

You know. There's been times. When I was younger.

Invisibility. Hiding in showers. I know.

But I was you know. I was in my late 40s. So you know.

I was young. But now. I just want to do good.

I'd want to. I'd want to do. I guess I'd like to have all the powers.

The power of intelligence maybe. Or the power of reason. The power of.

Logic. Because that could possibly go against. The norm.

I don't know. I suppose it'd be quite nice. To have the power.

To reach a larger audience. That'd be nice. If I could be boring to more people.

I know I've got. I've got a nice. I've got the best audience ever.

So. It'd be nicer if it was. Larger.

Just to see whether or not. I don't know. Probably the power of healing.

Yeah. Ultimately. So I wouldn't really be a superhero.

Necessarily. Although I would be super. But I wouldn't be able to really.

Stop crime or anything like that. But then. If you offer the power of healing.

Then that in itself would stop a lot of crime. Because people. Wouldn't be.

They'd be less worried if I could just come to me or. Look at my picture or hear my voice and know that that would heal them. Then.

It'd take a lot of pressure off. The world. So yeah.

I think that be a healer. Yeah. That'd be cool.

Have a healing voice. Because it's okay to be a healer and people can touch my hand or whatever. But that's limiting isn't it.

But if I. Especially if they've been eating raw meat or anything like. Have you washed your hands? I'd be very fussy. And.

If they can hear my voice. And my voice heals. That'd be probably the best superpower in the world.

I suppose outside of. Being able to cause world peace again. But that in itself may cause.

It might cause world peace. If there's healing because. You know like.

You've all just got to get along with each other. Otherwise. I don't know.

I don't know. I tell people off. I'm not going to heal you.

Unless you get on with your neighbor. Say sorry. Otherwise you're going to have to keep your Veruca.

Can't believe I mentioned pearl cream. And constipation. Amazing.

Why would I do that? Anyway. I think I've answered all the questions. So thank you everyone for your questions.

And I'm still limited. I'll put this down. All right Vinnie.

Thank you. Barry. Michelle.

Hope. Ravel. Ben.

And Michelle. So thank you very much for your questions. This has been quite a long recording.

And it's going to take some time to edit. I'm not sure. If I'm going to get that done tonight.

Or have to do it first thing in the morning. It might be a Saturday morning job to be honest with you. But either way.

It will be done. So thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself.

Because you do deserve to be happy. And be gentle with yourself. You deserve to feel safe.

Lots of love. Bye.