#39 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks (Jason newland)

Hello, welcome to relaxation hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes.

Now, I try and do different recordings every time and I'm going to just do a relaxation session here. So I won't be really talking about anything specific necessarily, more just going to be a full body relaxation. Kind of a body scan slash meditation mindfulness kind of thing.

And the reason I'm doing this is because I was talking to somebody the other day. It was Thursday and she asked me, we were talking about the time when I was dealing with excessive anxiety, panic attacks. And she asked me what I did practically to help myself.

And I thought about it because I wasn't sure quite how to answer it. So I did a few things. Some things were not forced upon me but I ended up feeling that I needed to do.

One was to stop working for a little while. And although I did stick with the job for a year while I was having the anxiety and the panic attacks, but eventually I felt I had to give that job in, so I did. But other things, I tried quite a few different things.

And some aromatherapy and exercise. And the thing I think, one of the things that helped me a lot was learning to meditate. And I went to a Buddhist center near where I lived.

It's always best to go somewhere near where you live I think, rather than traveling for seven hours. And I went to a Buddhist meditation center. They did two types of meditation.

One was mindfulness of breathing and the other one was the metta bhavana, which is, I should know this, shouldn't I? Creating loving kindness. And this is back in 2002, the end of the year, November time, that I started going to the meditation. So I said to this person I was talking to on Thursday, I said I went to meditation, that's something that helped.

And she said to me that focusing on your breath can really help. And then I remembered, I remembered that actually focusing on my breath was the last thing that I wanted to do at that time. Because when I focused on my breath, I find, you know, it was the breathing issues, it was the shortness of breath.

And I found that I was too focused already on my breath before I even started meditating. So what I needed really was to maybe a different focus, a more overall focus. But at the same time, finding a way to be able to focus on my breath without it sending me into some kind of panicky state of mind.

So that was a little hurdle. It wasn't a major hurdle, it was slightly difficult. Because the person that was teaching me meditation, but me in the group, wasn't aware of my condition.

And I wasn't aware of the benefits of meditation for my condition. So it was a kind of a very experimental thing for me. So I ended up doing, because with the mindfulness of breathing, it's a few stages and you count the outward breath for a while, maybe for five minutes or 10 minutes and they ring a bell.

And then you count the in-breath for five or 10 minutes till they ring the bell. And you count from one to 10, and then start again at one. And if your mind wanders off, you just come back and start at one again.

And then gradually you stop counting and you focus on just your breathing on its own. So what I did in the moments when, at the times when I didn't feel very comfortable focusing on my breath, because at times it felt a little bit like hyperventilating. When you're hyperventilating, it's an over-focus on your breath, isn't it? It's not the only reason for it, but it's the anxiety that comes in with that.

So what I needed was not so much a distraction, although that can be useful. What I found myself doing was sitting there and just being there, just sitting. And there's a Zen kind of meditation called Zazen, which is just sitting.

And they normally have their eyes open a little bit and they're looking at maybe a carpet or the floor. And I actually studied this back in 1994 from some audio tapes. But again, it's by focusing on the body or being aware of your body as an overall thing, rather than focusing too intensely on a physical reaction that I may have been having due to my state of mind, anxiety, stress, whatever it may be.

So it's kind of like, you could say, just watching the traffic, just watching the traffic go by and not getting too caught up in any particular car, just letting it go by, just go by anyway. So it's just observing. So I found that was quite a useful thing to do until I was able to get to the point of feeling comfortable focusing and counting my breaths.

So that brings up yet another potential misconception or misunderstanding sometimes from maybe somebody that hasn't experienced extreme anxiety, but then we all experience things differently. So I just feel it's very important that you do what works for you. And that's just so important to find what is useful for you.

And these recordings have multi-layered reasons behind them. There's the relaxation aspect of the recording, even when I'm being conversational about anxiety or, you know, my own experiences, which you may be able to relate to, which may mean that you perhaps feel less on your own than maybe you did before. I mean, luckily with the internet, that's not always a great thing with forums and Facebook groups.

You can get a bit nasty on there sometimes, but one thing that comes out of the internet is you can get to realize that actually whatever you're going through, although other people won't know what it feels like to be you, they will have gone through what you're going through. There's going to be someone out there that has already walked that path, whether it's the path leading to the illness or the path leading to recovery.

And that can be quite nice.

I think that's a benefit that a lot of people get from joining online groups for their, maybe for someone who's got fibromyalgia, for example, they'll join a group and they'll see that other people also have difficulty doing housework or difficulty getting out of bed at times. And then they can relate to that and think, realize that they're not the only one, that there's nothing wrong with them as far as they're not abnormal.

They're not, they're just not just, but they're ill.

They've got an illness and they share some of those symptoms with others that also have that particular condition. And of course, it's different for everybody, yet there are always going to be similarities. And with anxiety, stress, panic, again, it's different for everybody.

Of course, it is, we all experience the world differently. There's a reason why there's millions and millions of different types of food available, because people don't all like the same stuff. Some people love peanut butter.

I really don't. And I can't figure out how anyone could. And I'm sure there's millions of people could never understand how other people couldn't love it.

But this is not about peanut butter. It's about uniqueness. So we're all unique.

So we all experience anxiety, stress, panic in a different way. Yet there will be similarities. When you read another person's description of how they were feeling.

So that's part of what this is about. So you don't feel alone. So that you realize that actually, there's a lot of people out there that have dealt with this.

There's a lot of people out there that have come out the other end and flourished. And I was thinking another thing that there was a conversation going on between two people I know a few months back. And one was saying that he has anxiety attacks.

And his friend said, I see you have panic attacks. And the reply was, no, I have anxiety attacks. I do not have panic attacks.

And everyone said, well, the same thing. And they kind of had an argument, I didn't get involved because I couldn't be bothered really. They seem to be enjoying themselves arguing.

Sometimes all people need is to just feel that they're right. And they're happy. Yet they are the same thing.

It's just a different description for the same thing. Because the word panic, I mean, thinking about this, panic is something you're fearful, you're worried about something happening. That would be like a panic, wouldn't it? Oh, something's about to happen.

And I think throughout the whole process of having anxiety attacks and having extreme stress and anxiety, the only thing I was ever really worried about was having a panic attack. That's what I was panicky about. So I was panicking about panic.

But I wasn't panicking about panic, I was panicking about anxiety. I was panicking about having that extreme physical and emotional exaggerated feeling that seemed to just manifest itself out of nowhere. And believing that I was going to die when I wasn't.

And that was the thing I feared most, having one of those anxiety attacks. And then it brings the other side of things, what you're anxious for. Why just deal with the anxiety, deal with whatever it is you're anxious about, therefore you won't have anxiety attacks.

And that's another thing that some people struggle to understand, that actually, you know, I've had panic attacks or anxiety attacks in the past when I was in a bookshop. All I was doing was looking for a book to read. There was absolutely no stress involved, there was nobody in the shop, it wasn't busy.

It was a carefree day, really. Other than, I suppose, in the back of my mind, hoping that I wouldn't have a panic attack. And I did, out of nowhere.

And I had to run out of the shop. Couldn't breathe, had to run out, was sweating. And I caught my breath, and I did what I, at that time, I associated that shop with having panic attacks, as I started to do at that time, associating different places that I had them, and then trying to avoid those places.

Thinking, trying to think logically about something that's not logical. Panic attacks, anxiety attacks are not logical. Technically, generally, of course, they can be logical if it's, you know, in a situation where somebody's having to do something or kind of being forced to do something that they really don't want to do.

They say, public speaking, and they've said, I don't want to do that. And they've been told, well, you've got to do it. It's part of your job, you have to do this.

And, you know, if you don't do it properly, you'll lose your job, or something's, you know, ridiculous like that. Or you have to talk publicly because it's part of your exam. And then the person might have an anxiety attack.

So that could be technically a logical, understandable reaction to extreme stress. To expect someone to do something that they really don't want to do, and demanding it is, I dare to say, cruel, actually. It's a very cruel and unkind thing to do.

And there's people that think that, people out there that think that those that have anxiety and panic attacks and stress are weak. It's got nothing to do with weakness. It's got nothing to do with strength.

It's just to do with being a human being. I know a person that had their first panic attack when they were 70. Never had one before, didn't know what to do.

But nobody knows what to do. You know, I think when anyone has their first one, nobody knows what to do because it's such a strange experience. Although it's different for everybody, it's strange for everybody, pretty much guaranteed.

I'll bet money on that. One of the weirdest experiences, almost an out-of-body experience for me. It's like I was astral travelling while I was awake, at work.

It was very spacey, like someone had put LSD in my tea or something. Very, it was absolutely terrifying, I'll be honest. And, but that's okay.

And what was, what made it quite difficult at the time, I was 32. My manager, I worked in insurance, my manager was about 22. And it's not really about age, but he'd never been ill.

He'd never, never had an illness other than just colds, you know, just general stuff. And I said to him, I said, look, I keep having these anxiety attacks. In fact, I didn't know what they were, I hadn't been to the doctor.

But I said, I keep having this shortish of breath and I don't know what's going on. And he just laughed. I said, just get back to work.

And then I think I went back to work. But I didn't go back the next day. And I saw the doctor and he signed me off for a week.

And then after a week, he signed me off for another two weeks. And I phoned my boss up, my manager. And I said, just to let you know, doctor's given me another two weeks off.

I've sent the sick note in the post. To work. So I can't get, I can't get out.

I'm kind of a bit housebound at the moment. And he said to me, well, you need to phone in every day. I said, what do you mean? He said, you just need to phone in every day to let us know that you're not coming in.

I said, well, I just told you I'm not coming in. And he said, well, if you don't phone in every day, then you might go to disciplinary. So I couldn't quite understand where he's coming from.

So anyway, I phoned up the HR department, human resources, and I told them what had been said to me. And I told them that I would not be phoning in every day. And I'd been signed off by a doctor.

And I also said that I was very upset with what I'd been, how I'd been spoken to. And he got disciplinary. He didn't lose his job, but he got told off.

And part of the reason I mentioned this is because, partly because I've only just remembered it. But also, I see stories online where people have been mismanaged by their bosses at work, you know, managers, line managers, whatever, you know, whoever's in charge, been mistreated, been laid off even, sacked because they've been ill. And that's not allowed.

And that's taking advantage of someone that's in a vulnerable situation. So that's something worth thinking about. Maybe if that fits in with the situation that you may have been involved in.

Anxiety, stress is an illness. It's not just a state of mind. It's not.

Regardless of how long it lasts, it's still an illness. An illness doesn't have to be something that lasts for a lifetime. An illness can be something that lasts for a week, a few weeks, maybe a few days even, but still an illness.

And it still deserves you to be respected. And also for you to be kind to yourself as well, so that you give yourself what you need. Whether it's time, whether it's space, whether it involves looking for a different job, or changing your parts of your life in order to reduce your stress levels.

Because I think as I've got older, I kind of always known this, I think, but it's really kind of become more obvious as I've aged, is if you're going to spend years of your life doing a job or living with somebody that you don't like, doing a job that you don't like, then chances are very high that you'll be unhappy. Chances are very high that your stress levels will be way above average.

And some kind of illness will present itself, whether in the form of anxiety or stress, or some other physical or mental illness.

So I do believe that actually, although it's easy to just say the words, get a different job. I know it's not that easy, necessarily. And I'm not saying get a different job.

What I am suggesting is look carefully at your life, the important parts of your life, and consider making changes for your health. Because this is your life, and don't you deserve to be happy? Even if it involves going back to college and spending three years studying a new subject in order to change careers, or taking a pay cut, or moving to a different part of the country or world even.

As a consideration for your health, I had an example of a previous girlfriend of mine, and she'd split up with her boyfriend who she was had a business with.

And she was owed about quite a bit of money. They had a house together. He sold it and kept the money.

But legally, she didn't really have, because the way it was done, she didn't have a lot of, the ball wasn't really in her court. You know, the legal side of things meant that he could get away with it, unless she could come up with some kind of evidence to prove that he'd defrauded her because he'd done the paperwork to make it all in her, in his name.

Well, she spent 10 years of her life taking him to court, accruing thousands upon thousands of pounds of legal expenses to the point where she actually ended up being taken to court by the solicitor that was working for her because he wasn't able to pay all of the expenses.

And she got ill as well, physically, emotionally ill. And I kept saying to her, give it up long before she got into even more trouble with it. And she said to me, it's easy for you because it's not your house.

And I understood that, but I tried to explain, is it worth it? The stress, the anxiety that she was going through, but she couldn't back down. Well, she could, but she decided, she chose not to be able to choose to back down. That's how she perceived herself.

And now she has backed down, but she's still being taken to court by a solicitor. I just feel it's sometimes taking a loss in the long run is a win. I lost a good job.

I quit that job that I had in insurance. I was very good at it. I was very likely to be promoted, even though I'd been ill, I was still performing very well during that last year, as well as previous to that.

But I knew that I was ill. I felt that the job was putting more into that. It seemed to be creating more stress.

And I also didn't want to be taking lots of time off ill. I wanted to just have a clean break and move on. And I got myself a part-time job in a shop, you know, low, very low kind of stress levels.

That's what I thought anyway, at the time. And I think leaving that job was good. It was the right decision.

But it was a big decision to make. So I suppose what I'm saying is, what can you do? What can you do to make your life a bit easier, less stressful, more relaxing? It can be as simple as meditating, which is what I was going to do during this session. I ended up talking.

So please forgive me for that. I will do a meditation in a future recording. And some relaxation sessions as well.

It's just, this just came out once I started talking. I'm just talking from my heart, I guess. Because I see, I've seen people, as a counsellor, I used to counsel people who would refuse to make changes that they needed to make.

I couldn't tell them that they needed to make it. I couldn't offer advice and I couldn't, obviously I couldn't tell them they had to do it. So this, you know, my position was really there to just be there for the person and to listen.

But sometimes I did make suggestions. And I would sort of put the question to them. You know, I'm wondering, why, why do you keep doing this to yourself? If you know it hurts you, if you know that it caused you pain and suffering, why are you doing it to yourself? When you could decide to make a change.

Now, I think I'm going to leave it there for this session, for this recording. But it's something that may be worth your time thinking about. What changes can you make? That will increase your quality of life.

That can reduce your stress levels, anxiety. And it could be something like going to learn meditation. You know, it could be a practical thing, joining the gym, going swimming.

Swimming and yoga are two things that physically are very good. Because swimming is your whole body's being used. And there's a focus.

So quite a focused activity. And yoga, again, very focused. And again, you're using your whole body.

Also get to meet new people as well. I went to yoga once, but I was in this room full of women. I was the only man, but there was a man teaching it.

And I did this, one of the stances, I can't remember what it was, one of the poses. And I didn't realize until it was too late, I let off a really loud fart. And I didn't go back.

I wasn't banned or anything. I just didn't, just felt a bit, a bit uncomfortable, you know, because I was just thinking, it wasn't the biggest room, and there's quite a few people there. We're quite kind of close together, a bit too close for my liking.

And I was thinking, a poor person that was close to me when I let that rip. So what changes can you make? It doesn't have to be, it possibly will be a life changing change. It doesn't have to be a big change, you know, it doesn't have to be changing your job or changing your where you live or buying a new car or getting married or the opposite to that.

It can be whatever it is for you, whatever you feel you need. And you may not, you may not know what you need until you experience it. So it may be a trial, trial and error situation, where you try things out.

Plus, there's no error involved. Try something out. And if it doesn't go the way you want it to go, you can decide.

You continue or you stop and do something different. And it's something about this, because once you get into that frame of mind where you've decided, you've decided that you're going to put yourself first, you're going to put your health first, first, things start to change. Because in the same way as if you're really, really nice to somebody that maybe you've paid no attention to before.

And they start to be nicer back to you. People seem nicer when you're nice to them. People seem to be more interesting when you're interested in them and they seem more interested in you.

It's kind of just the way it seems to go. But it also works within ourselves. So when you're being kind to yourself, it can be transformational, emotionally, mentally, even physically.

Because you're giving yourself something that you need, just in the same way as you give your stomach food when you're hungry. When you're thirsty, you drink. When you need to go to the toilet, you go to the toilet.

When you need to sleep, you go to sleep. This is just another one of those things. Giving yourself what you need is to just take some time to show yourself some love, to show yourself some kindness.

Because let's face it, it doesn't matter who you meet on the planet. There's only one person that will have spent their entire life with you from the second you were born throughout your entire life. And that's you.

Which means it's your responsibility to make sure that you're protected. Your responsibility to keep yourself safe and healthy for you. Because you deserve to be happy.

You deserve to feel safe. You deserve to feel relaxed. So those are just some ideas for today.

As I said, when I started this, I was going to do a relaxation session. But I like to think that all of my recordings are relaxing. So hopefully this was as well.

Plus a few ideas chucked in as well. So thank you for listening and I shall speak to you next time. Bye.