(no music) #1152 - Hello Tammy - Let Me Bore You To Sleep (1st July 2024)

Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

And before I start there is a question from Tammy. On my Facebook group, Jason Newland's Boring Group. Which you can join if you like.

That wasn't a message to Tammy because Tammy's already a member but the question was can I recommend any recordings for stress relief that I have produced? Um, I guess if it's the more hypnosis-y stuff I would recommend most of my stuff really. Like the deep sleep whisper hypnosis recordings, a relax in, well they're supposed to be anyway. There's the relaxation hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks.

Um, there's over 200, I've had 231 of those recordings. Um, there's the relax and sleep hypnosis daily. There's a couple of hundred of those recordings.

So there's quite a few to choose from really. Um, if Tammy, I'll sort of directly talk to you. If you're asking about what Let Me Bore You To Sleep episodes I could recommend, I'm not sure because I don't really, I don't take much notice of what I've talked about during those recordings.

Um, with the, well not all of them but with the, let's say for example the relax and sleep hypnosis daily, I would often give them a title which gives, well I like to think it gives some kind of an idea of what the content is but I'm not sure if it does. The relaxation hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks. Those have titles as well which should have a kind of a reference to what's inside the recording.

Um, but then I wasn't sure if the message was posted because I've not been so regular with these Let Me Bore You To Sleep recordings. And maybe you were concerned or maybe you thought maybe others have as well that I wasn't going to be doing these much more in the future but I am, I will be doing these regularly again. It's just had a bit of a, the thing is it's not that I've had a break from making recordings.

I've still been really busy with other aspects of the free service that I provide. It's just I struggle a little bit with doing more than one thing. So when I focus my mind on for example making videos for YouTube from the old recordings, the podcast episodes and then creating videos out of those and then posting them onto YouTube and everything.

That takes quite a bit of time, quite a bit of work to do. It's not hard work but it is time wise laborious. And you know because I first of all have to make an image for the podcast, then I have to make, then after I've made the image, excuse me, made the image for the actual podcast then I make a, well make an image for the video, then I make a video.

So I usually do about 10, 10 images first for 10 recordings or 10 future videos. And then, so for example yesterday or last night I made 201 to 210 deep sleep whisper hypnosis videos and posted them on YouTube last night to be released or scheduled to be released at over a 10 hour period. So the first one is one o'clock in the morning, two, three, four, five, all the way up to 10 o'clock.

It's about six o'clock now ish, yeah maybe about half six in the morning now on Monday the 1st of July I do believe, 2024. So once I've made the image then I've got the thumbnail image that I make which is the thumbnail for the video, the YouTube video, and then the thumbnail video is used in the actual video itself. And then I add, that's how I make the video.

I use Canva for all these different things when it comes to images. I'll create the image on ChatGPT to start with, that can take a bit of time to find out what kind image I want. And then I edit and delete and do different bits to create the image.

And then, so I've got the thumbnail, I add the recording, the audio recording to the thumbnail to make the video. And then I add a graphic, like a spiral animation onto the thumbnail. And I make it, you know, the correct length.

So if it's like 10 minutes or 45 minutes, whatever, I make it to the correct length. Try and make sure the volume is okay, and it's not too loud, not too low. Make sure there's no background music on there as well, because YouTube doesn't like background music.

Not my background music anyway. And then I download that, which can take a bit of time. Quite a while to do because they're anything up to three or four gigabytes, depending on the size of the length of the video.

Because it's no longer just a static page, it's got animation on it, so it's a moving video. And then once it's downloaded, so I download 10, so I produce 10 of these, download them all, and then I upload them to YouTube. I don't necessarily upload all 10 at the same time.

I might, I've got, I kind of got a lot of process now where I produce 10, I do, I produce three at a time. Because when they're downloading, canvas struggles are more than three at a time to download. So I do download three once they're produced, and that could take half an hour.

I then upload those to YouTube, and then I start on the next three. Now sometimes I will make all 10 recordings, all 10 videos, but not download them, just have them all saved on Canva. And then download three at a time.

Or download them one at a time, but it manages three downloads simultaneously. And then, you know, I try and upload 10 recordings a day on YouTube, so that I can eventually have all of my stuff on there. So it's quite time consuming, if you think for every three recordings, it's half an hour, 10 minutes, 10 minutes to download each video.

And there's 10 videos. So what's that? Hour and a half or whatever of downloading. Yeah, it's about right, isn't it? About 10, hour and a half.

And then upload in probably about the same. So let's say three hours of downloading and uploading all together for those 10 recordings. And then you've got another let's say 10 minutes producing each video.

So that's what three, four and a half hours of time to produce 10 videos. You can be shorter than that. Sometimes it can be longer.

So there's quite a lot of time goes into producing these videos. Just with the whole image making and you know, it does take a while to do to be honest. If you go from like start to finish, yeah, probably about four and a half hours, five hours to make 10.

I mean, sometimes, I mean, there's been days where I've managed to do 40. Which means I mean, with the deep sleep whisper hypnosis recordings, a lot of them around about 20 minutes long, so they take a lot less time to download, process and upload than the hour long ones. For obvious reasons, I guess, because they're not as big.

But the larger files, the larger ones that are maybe 45-50 minutes long, they don't always run quite so smoothly. And the the downloading from Canva onto my laptop, sometimes due to the internet not being particularly wonderful, at times, can get disrupted. So I have to keep restarting it, not the laptop, but the download.

And yeah, so that's, that's it really. So I've been working on that, also been working on the website. Now, I've come to the conclusion that I was thinking, do I need a website, meh, meh, meh, meh, you know, all that stuff.

I'm not sure what the meh, meh, meh, meh means. But I was like, do I need the website? Do I? And I realised, yeah, I do. Mainly, because it's too many recordings, I've got too many to, to be found without some kind of searching ability.

So I need the website to kind of archive all the stuff to make it accessible. It's okay having a podcast or two podcasts I've got. Well, actually, I've got, I did get back on Spreaker as well.

So I've got quite a few podcasts on there. But they're just the ones about music. I was going to do longer recordings about music, but there's just not enough time.

It's, if I get too bogged down with just working on one recording, it, it puts me off making another one. You know, if I know that every time I make a Let Me Bore You To Sleep, I'm going to, I'm just going to be spending like three, four hours after I've made the recording. I just, I don't want to be spending that much time on that.

I'd rather, I quite like the process I've got going, where I make the recording, then I have a break, you know, I don't do anything, maybe I make the recording. Well, today, I'm doing it in the morning, which means I'm more awake, I'm more alert, kind of, I'm a bit tired, I suppose, but I'm more, I'm not worn out by the day. So, you know, when I make these recordings in the evening, admittedly, I might have something to talk about, because I might have gone out during the day, well, with Vinnie, anyway, I might have been talking about the day.

Of course, I could talk about yesterday, all my troubles seem so far away, can't help it, sorry. I could talk about a dream I had, but I don't think you're going to want to hear about that. Seriously, it was like, wow.

Anyway, I, Vinnie's in bed right now, I woke up and he had the bed covers over him, I don't know how he managed to do that. So, I get out of bed really, I woke up, what, just after, I don't know, half four this morning, which is about normal for me, I normally wake up about between four and six, usually between four and five, to be honest.

I did go to bed fairly early, I went to bed, I think, just after nine o'clock last night, listened to the radio and yeah, it was okay.

10, 11, 12, 1, 2, 3, 4, so I had about seven hours. So, I managed to get out of bed and I put the covers a bit more over him, just covered him a little bit more and he's happy. He loves having the covers over him.

He's fast asleep and he needs more sleep than me, which is weird. Once he's in bed and once he's settled down, that's it. He doesn't want to get up.

He's very cute. I was watching him yesterday, it was, I don't know, last night, taking him for a walk and just seeing his little tail moving around and his, his bums pointing up in the air with pride, it's so funny to watch him. He's got his really muscular hind legs, like the top of his legs, like very muscular and just so little that he loves being outside, loves it.

And he is, I don't know, I'm never really going to understand him, but hey, why should I? He's got so much character, so much, it's hard to explain. That's probably the same for every dog. I mean, I'm not, not all dogs are the same, but all, all animals have got character and they, and just like we have, we're just animals, aren't we, really?

And that's why I think is the, the issue that maybe some people kind of in my life, when I had Andre, they thought of him as like being a gerbil or some, like an animal that is not classed as being particularly, having much of a personality, but gerbils maybe really have really great personalities as well, I don't know.

But I remember one of my friend's friends brought up a, a wheel, you know, one of those gerbil wheels to put in Vinnie, in Andre's cage when I first got him, so he could run around in the cage, run around in the wheel rather. And he came up a few, you know, but a week later, is he enjoying his wheel? I said, he's not a gerbil. He doesn't get, he doesn't, he's not just going to run on a wheel aimlessly for no reason.

I mean, humans do that, don't they? Treadmills, you know, to get exercise and stuff, but that doesn't stimulate him. He wants to cause mischief. He wants to destroy the sofa.

He wants to try and escape. He wants to steal my food, you know, he wants to have fun. He's not interested in just running on a wheel pointlessly.

You know, this, that's not what he's about. And I got a sense that some people that I know didn't really understand how I could be close to what some people class as a rodent, which he is not a rodent. He was a, more in the kind of, well, he wasn't a rodent officially, you know, that wasn't his species.

He was more like the badger, the badger species, the skunk kind of, the porcupine, the, what are they called, wolverine. That was a species that he was part of. Very, you know, the ones that could produce aromas, which he really did sometimes.

Wow. Sometimes he dropped a smell that was so pungent. I mean, once, I mean, it's not even exaggeration.

I was cuddling him and I think he got stressed. Maybe there was a noise outside or something or whatever it was, he had a reaction and he basically skunked on me. This is rare.

He'd let off a smell, but that was it. This time he let off a scent on me, on my t-shirt and I had to chuck the t-shirt away. And he didn't like do a wee wee on me or anything like that.

It was just the smell. Left off, he let off a pung and it was really bad. I mean, I literally, the, I took the t-shirt off.

It was quite, it was twice I heard, no, I don't think so. First of all, when I took my t-shirt off, Andre looked at me like, no, no, wasn't pleased. That was more to do with the fact that I was topless, I think.

Secondly, when I went to put the t-shirt into the washing machine, the washing machine said, no, no, you ain't putting that in there, in the bin. So I went to put it in the bin. No, no, third time the bin said, no, no, no, no, outside mate, stick it outside.

So I put it outside. Fire engine was called. I mean, no one knew what the hell it was.

It was like, just awful smell, really bad. But I think that's the only time he really let one off that was, that was the worst one. That was the scatter bomb thing.

It was just, it was, he let off his nuclear arsenal that day. Really, really strong. But I don't think he could control it, to be honest.

Maybe he could, well, maybe he could, which means he was being a bit mean to me that day. I'm not sure what I was talking about, Andre, I don't know. I've been thinking about him lately.

I don't really know why. Possibly the fact that I uploaded loads of videos of him on YouTube and I don't know, I've just been thinking about him. So, so Vinnie's okay, he's asleep in the bedroom, so he's happy.

I think, I've been thinking about this for a while. And I have been doing exercise. At home, so I've got this new thing where I do, I start doing 30 press ups every time before I take Vinnie out for a walk and usually do another 30 press ups when I get home.

And now I've upped it to 40 because I've been doing it for a week or two. And I take him out, what, three, four times a day. So, because I was having problems.

I had a thing a couple of years back, a few years, I don't know how long ago, where my upper back started aching. And I went to the doctors and he basically said that it was lack of use because I wasn't using my muscles because, you know, spending too much time in bed, which I did the last couple of weeks. I probably spent, well, not probably have spent a lot more time laying down than I normally do.

But right now, even when things were going okay, normally I'd be back in bed lying down till about nine. When I wake up at four, I get up, have my breakfast, watch TV for a bit, or work on the podcast, you know, do all the editing and stuff, then have my breakfast or whatever. So for a couple of hours and then go back to bed for another couple of hours, you know, from about seven to nine.

So doing this is a little bit different, you know, I don't, don't really feel the need to go back to bed. But what I had is, when this happened with my back, I bought a brace to try and keep my back straight. Because I've always, I've got the issue with my lower back, that's just arthritis.

My upper back, it kind of made no sense to me. But then the doctor said, well, you're lying down, if you're lying down a lot, it means you're just not using your muscles. And what you're doing, you're not lying down, you're sitting at a computer, which I do, or you're sitting down watching telly.

So I do walk. At that point, I didn't have thinning. So I wasn't going out for regular walks.

And even no matter where I am, mood wise or whatever, I still have to go out every day with Vinnie. I do admit sometimes if I'm not up to it, I'll take him in a shared garden out of the back, which he doesn't really want to do. But it gives him a chance to have a little sniff around and go to the toilet and that maybe, but he doesn't like to go to the toilet in the garden.

He prefers to do it on someone else's front lawn, just in front of their living room, so everyone can watch him do it. Like a neighbour, he loves that. It's as though he actually calls them, oi, oi, look, look what I'm doing on your lawn.

It's very rude. And you see them just watching me pick it up. Man, when I had Andre, I didn't have to go out ever.

He liked going out, but it wasn't like necessary, you know, it wasn't compulsory as it were. He didn't need to go outside. It was more just for fun.

Vinnie has to go outside, it's one of those things, just it's necessary. But not as often as we go out, like on a normal day, let's say go out at nine o'clock, you try and wait until the school, all the school kids are, and all that stuff, you know, is done. So there's not, we're not in a way.

Go out, maybe quarter past nine, half nine, ten, whatever time. And then probably go out again, just about every four hours, usually, would go out. So maybe again in midday, one o'clock, two, then again, you know, five, then again.

So yeah, four times a day, at least. Sometimes five times, but generally, generally about four times a day, we go for walks. And I think the last few weeks, it's cut down a little bit to maybe twice a day.

Plus, you know, just going into the garden whenever he needs it. So the upper back thing started to happen, like, okay, I recognize these feelings, these physical sensations. So I'm not using my upper back.

I haven't, hadn't done much exercise for a few weeks. And so I decided I'll start doing, start doing some exercises. So I do the, what are they called? Squats? Oh, are they squats? Not lunges.

I don't know, but they're good for the lower back. So I do that. But I started doing especially the press-ups.

And I do that, as I said, like, multiple times a day. And, you know, I noticed the feeling in my arms, I can, you know, the muscles a bit more tense in my arms and shoulders and my back, my chest. I also noticed that it does, it also works the muscles in my stomach, which is, I guess it's just an overall body thing.

I mean, even the legs are used. So I do that. I'm, you know, it's 40 now, so I'll probably increase it to maybe 50 next week or the week after.

Because, you know, it's, I could, I could do 100, maybe more, but it would knacker me out if I did that. So doing 40s, 30s easy. Okay, the first 20 is easy.

And then after that, it gets a little bit, there's a little bit more difficulty. But I could, I could push it to 100, I reckon. And be very exhausted afterwards.

Muscularly wise. But I'm not that bothered about pushing myself. I quite like the idea of just gradually doing it.

That way, I'm not spending a few days in pain from, you know, I guess, well, that's what bodybuilders do, they break down the muscles. So they push the muscles to the extreme. So the muscle is damaged.

Not, not in a kind of a different kind of way to not ripped or torn or sprained or anything like that. But the muscle itself is damaged and broken down. And then when it repairs, it can, you know, repairs and be bigger with the help of a diet, you know, and stuff.

So I'm not really trying to do that. I'm just, I think it'd be nice to see if it's possible to have a decent body again. Because I, the last time I had a body that I used to get excited about.

It sounds weird. The last time I had a, I would say a fairly decent body, was probably 2010, 2009. When I was doing boxing.

I definitely lost some. Yeah, I lost some fat doing that. Because that was full on.

Really? Yeah, that was a lot of work. But then when I did Taekwondo in 2011, onwards for a few years. I did, I think I lost some fat in that one.

And that was good. Physically as well. But I saw a picture of one of the great just just after a grading.

And there's a picture of me holding my certificate. And with the rest of the club, and I got my belt on and my belly's like hanging over my belt. Oh, okay.

So that. Yeah, it's a little bit overweight, even though I was I probably lost weight doing it. So be nice to be.

I think it'd be nice to be this size. But with a slim waist. Kind of if that makes sense.

Yeah, I don't I don't think it's I mean, it's possible, but I don't I don't think really that getting back down to my ideal weight, which is supposedly 11 and a half stone based on my height of five or eight. And take into consideration build on that one. Now, 11 half stone.

It's not little anyway. It's it's not light. It's probably quite a nice weight.

But it just realistically, I'm probably 15 and a quarter stone. I have lost weight. And but I just, you know what, I don't want it to be fast.

I like to do things slowly. That's just how I am in life. And part of the reason is, I've seen the results, just online videos, pictures and stuff of some really overweight males who have lost weight very quickly.

Now, it might have been like really important that they lose weight very quickly. So I'm not not judging or knocking them. Because you know, might save their life so good on them.

But I see one of the problems with losing weight too quickly is the excess skin which I don't really want to have. Now I realized that my skin is stretched. It must have, especially my belly's out of all proportion now.

I mean, I've looked pregnant for the last 15 years. So it's, honestly, I am an ambulance driver. When I had a bit of a medical thing last year, a paramedic came along and they looked at my belly.

They weren't there for my belly button. It sounds weird. You called an ambulance for your belly button? No, I didn't.

But they, but I was topless having my ECG done or whatever. And they said, are you've had a hernia? I said, how does that explain whatever it is I was called? I said, no, nothing to do with why I'd called them to start with. But they looked at my belly button.

He said, yeah, you've had a hernia. And I said, how? He said, because you're so fat. I said, what? He said, yeah, basically.

I don't think he might not have put it in those words. Yeah, he might have done to be honest, because it's hard to really argue. If a professional medical expert points out that my belly's, I've got a large belly, and I can see that I've got a large belly, and I know that I've got a large belly, and they're pointing out it for a medical reason.

I can't really, you know, so don't mention my belly. And the fact is he was helping me by pointing out that I have got a hernia or I've had a hernia and my belly button does hurt sometimes. And which means there's too much pressure, there's too much weight on my midsection.

So I need to reduce that. Not just for the sugar levels, the cholesterol and all that stuff that's been going on. But just generally, I mean, the last time I was slim was 2004, so 20 years ago.

And I always remember this, I don't know why I say I always, I do remember it now, was that was 2004. I didn't drink any alcohol. And I also went quite a few months without eating any chocolate.

And I was also a vegetarian. So that wasn't a lot to get out of bed for, to be honest. It was, yeah, it was difficult.

I was exercising at home and I was also doing Wing Chun Kung Fu as well, twice, two, three times a week in the evenings. So I think it was, was it Tuesday, Thursday, like normal Wing Chun and then Friday was leg spa. So I used to just go and spa but you can only use your legs to block and attack.

So that was, I used to enjoy that actually. And that's the last time I had any kind of real, I don't want to say kicking ability because my kicking has never been great, to be honest, even when I did karate when I was a kid. I've never, never really had great flexibility as far as legs go.

I could do it but I could, I could kick my own head height. But considering I'm only three foot tall, it's not that, that difficult really. You've got to lift your leg off the ground and you're kind of head height already.

But those people that can literally, when they kick high, it's like they're doing the splits and they can kick, they might be my height but be able to kick someone who's six foot five in the face. No, no, no, no, not me. I wouldn't even attempt to kick someone even in a, even as a joke.

Because, no, it's just not my thing. I've never had, I don't know why, it might just be my hips or something. But I never enjoyed stretching.

Even as, literally, I mean I used to be able to do the splits when I was a little kid like probably most kids can. But even then I didn't used to be able to get all the way down. So I remember when I was about 11, just started high school and these two older kids who were about three years older, one grabbed each arm, one grabbed each of my arms and was dragging me to, he's like that, they used to bully the little kids.

But it was kind of like a playing thing, like play bullying if that makes sense. Wasn't really, wasn't bullying, it was just, I had to, not to explain it, but the kids get going back for more because they enjoyed it. You know, it's weird.

But anyway, they grabbed me and they were pulling me or escorting me to some kind of punishment that they devised. And I did the splits and tripped them both over. And it just jumped on them, laughed and ran off.

So that was me. No training or anything like that at that time. But it's just stuff I'd seen on Kung Fu, you know, the TV show and I naturally had that, that naughtiness in me and that kind of acrobatic.

I think I'd have been quite a fairly good acrobat when I was little. Now, not so much. But when I was really little, I was like a little monkey.

I do, I know I've probably spoken about this before, but I had, dodgeball was my favourite thing. Now, football didn't like it because my problem with sports was nearly everybody was bigger than me. So when it comes to physical sports, they do have the advantage.

You know, if you're playing football or rugby, especially rugby, blimey, the bigger kid has the advantage over the little kid. Especially when it's not just about size, it was also puberty. There was, there was kids in the first year of high school who were like, they'd like turn 12.

I turned 11 in September. No, I turned 11 in August, the end of August. They turned 12 a week into the high school.

So some of them were nearly a year older than me at school, in high school. And also some of them were just, they'd gone through puberty. So it wasn't just that they were bigger, but they were stronger because they were like little men, or, you know, miniature men, mini, mini men, like kids, but adults kind of.

And it just seemed unfair and all that aggression and stuff. I didn't like it. Just never a big fan of being kicked.

No, sorry, someone kicked me. I'd have to go after them and try and kick them back. Just, just didn't like it.

It was too rough. Plus I didn't have any skill. I didn't have any, you know, I had football boots.

I had the football kit. I had the shin pads, all that stuff, all that crap. And, you know, football boots with the spikes and stuff.

I had all that, but I just didn't see the point in it. I just never, as far as I'm thinking about football, because at the moment we're going through the European, European Cups going on, and England got through to the, to the final 16 last night, which is the, is it a final 16? I think they got through the first round anyway. And I think if anything, I'm not really a football fan, but watching it is, I prefer to watch it than play it.

I think it's because no one ever passed me the ball. Maybe. I mean, I did score a triplet, a treble or whatever once, but it was in the wrong goal.

Now I didn't realise at half time, you swap, you swap goals. I didn't realise that. So I thought I was doing really well.

I'm like, why is everyone shouting? Can't they be pleased for me? And yeah, just, I was basically, I guess my goalkeeper didn't expect me to be trying to get the ball in the net. One of them wasn't really classed as a goal because I think I did it after the game. I'm not sure.

Or during the break. But yeah, it was like, well, I thought I did well. Just like I won the hundred metres once.

This is true. Everything I say is semi true, maybe. But this one is absolutely true.

It was in the summer and I was, we were all, I think we were preparing for sports day or I don't know, but just, you know, preparing a track and the different things. Because sports day was different. At junior school, sports day was all about egg and spoon races.

And what's that, what's that race that you're in a, you're in a sack. You have to like, you know, or other races where you're, you're tied together with someone else. SNM race or something.

But in high school, it was very much more long jump, high jump, javelin. It was like a, like a mini, I suppose, Olympics, I guess. That kind of sports day, really.

And so we were racing and I, I got prepared and I was, I was, I was a fast runner for my size. But the problem is I was so little. And most of the other kids were head and shoulders above me, literally.

They were just bigger, stronger, more powerful and faster. Because they were taller. So they had, you know, for every one, yeah, for every one of their steps, I was doing about seven.

So I thought on this time, I'm going to really give it a go. Because I remembered like, I can run fast. So I'm just going to do it.

Stuff them. And I did it. The, I always had like a star pistol, bing.

Well, I didn't go bing, but you know, it's, it didn't like start. It wasn't that kind of sound, but it was a pop kind of gun thing. And I went and I thought, I'm going to win this.

So I did just ran. And I could not believe I looked behind me, you know, peripherally. I didn't just like look around, stop and carry on running.

I could not believe I was ahead. I was ahead. There was one very close to me.

There was one. No, there's two. Just think of two people.

One was really tall. The other one was like super fast. I was still ahead.

And I remember reaching that line and put my hands up. Yeah. And instead of, I didn't expect them necessarily to congratulate me.

I thought at least one, one of them was my friend. I thought maybe one of them would congratulate me. I kind of expected maybe a couple to be a bit jealous or even surprised like, Jason, how did you manage to become so sporty? All of a sudden, you never showed any interesting in running before.

So one of them used to talk. And, but I didn't get any of that. But one person was rude to me.

Not one person congratulate me. You know what they did? Every single one of them kept on running. Turns out it's a 200 meter.

Genuinely, this genuinely happened. So they were pacing themselves. I was going for 100 meters.

I was knackered when it got to 100 meters and I stopped. And they kept on running like why? You can't beat me just by running further. That's not how it works.

And then the teacher said, well, actually is how it works as a 200 meter. I said, oh, I said, I don't know what the measurement is. How am I supposed to know how far it is? He said, well, did you not notice? I was standing over there at the stop line to me to see there's some of a flag and there's a piece of tape.

Did you not see that? I said, no. Did you ever consider getting some glasses? I said, well, if you, he said, I'm wearing glasses. I said, I couldn't see.

Maybe I should get some glasses. He said, yeah, don't be rude to me in the future. I said, why not? I'm a teacher.

He said, don't ever be rude to me again. I said, do I want? What was it to do with you? What are you going to do about it? Eh? Eh? What are you going to do about it? Oh, fish head, you old smelly old barrel bum poo poo head. I thought to myself, it's weird though.

Always the PE teachers, the, you know, the physical education teachers, always tough guys. No one messed with them. It was weird there.

The only teacher in this, well, not the only teacher, there was three, but one, the only teacher really that was a physical, like none of the tough kids would mess with that teacher. No rude kids would be rude. It was just like, everyone was just like, okay, let's just keep calm.

We've all had a lot to drink and let's just calm down, you know? So I can't remember his name. Sir, I think it was, I thought it was his name, Sir. There's a lot of Sirs at school and Miss.

Oh, do you know, when I went to university, bearing in mind I was, me, 37, 37 years old, I kept calling the teachers Miss. She didn't like it. Well, a few teachers, he didn't like it and she didn't, none of them liked it.

Miss, and I was just, they thought I was taking the piss out of her, but I was, I was making fun of myself in a way. Just the idea of saying Miss at my age, like I'm back at school. Miss, don't call me Miss.

I'm a married lady and my name is Partridge. My surname is Partridge. So it'd be Mrs. Partridge, not Miss.

Okay, Mrs. Partridge, this is an adult education. Call me Tracy. I said, make your mind up.

She said, that's rude. Detention. Never got detention, not in high, not in university.

But what I did notice, because I went to college, when I went to college, this is like when I was 37, it was, there was different departments. So there was the counseling department that I was part of. Then there is, there was also younger people that had just left school and they were studying in health and beauty.

And there's, there was a whole section thing for building. There was a section for cars and, you know, autumn, automobiles, whatever you want to call mechanics and stuff. I noticed that the school leaders would talk to and treat very differently to how I was treated.

They were treated with respect. They were like talked down to and told off like they were school kids. And I thought the whole point of, well not the whole point, but one of the main benefits of leaving school is to never have to be talked down to like that again.

Never have to put up with that, you know, just have to put up with someone like a teacher being like that. Because you leave school and that's hopefully the end of that. And of course, you know, if you go into the armed forces, then you've chosen to be around more of that, being told what to do and spoken to like you're, you're, well, a servant or a slave or, you know, you just have to do what you're told.

Subservient. Never appealed to me to be subservient, which is weird because I was in the sea cadets for a couple of years, constantly being told what to do. But then I used to just ignore them and laugh at them.

Perhaps that wasn't the best thing to do. I didn't like, I never liked being told what to do. Really.

I mean, the problem is getting told what to think, getting told what to do. It's like, you know, I do have a brain. It's not my, it's not up to much, but it does semi work.

He said semi. It does work. I mean, I've always pretty much had the, I reckon most kids got the ability to think for themselves.

I think my benefit is never been particularly popular. Is that a benefit? But I've never, I've never been part of a group. I had individual friends that were parts of different groups, you know, but at school, I had friends that were the ruffians and I was in, in a, in, well, I was in a class with quite a few of those troublemakers and the ones that refused to do what they were told.

And I suppose you would call it the special needs class, I guess now. And I was taken out of, I think it was halfway through the first year or after the first term of maths, the first term of first year, I was taken out of the maths class, maybe another class and put into the remedial class. I don't know what they called it.

We weren't given a name, but we were given a room and me and probably 10 other kids were in this room, big room on our own, left for, I mean, sometimes a teacher would come in, but generally we were on our own for 90 minutes to one lesson or two lessons. And it'd be games and stuff like that we could play. So I got to know them.

I got to be part of that group, which I was quite glad of, to be honest, because it was, it was nice to be, it's nice to belong. So I was, I would have been special needs if I'd have been at school today, back then, you know, like how I was when I was a kid, I would have been special needs. I probably would have had some kind of diagnosis of something.

I don't know what, who knows. Chances are I wouldn't have got diagnosed with bipolar as a kid because it's, I think it's quite a rare thing. Although that probably is what was going on.

But the, yeah, I also knew some of the intelligent kids, like some of the higher, higher level, because what happened is in the first year of high school, I was in the middle. So there was this big word called Osprey. And so every O-S-P-R-E-Y.

So there was six classes in the first year. Okay. Well, I think maybe every year, to be honest.

So if you was in Osprey, if you was in the first year, you'd be in 1-0 or 0-1, 1-0 or 1-P, 1-R, O-S-P-R-E-Y, O-S-P-R-E-Y. So yes, there's six. I was in R. So P and R were kind of not equal, but there wasn't a lot in it.

I was kind of just on the outside towards the, the lower level, but not quite. I was sort of in the middle-ish. O was the top.

Y was the bottom. Which seems a bit rude, really, doesn't it? It seems a bit uncalled for to have classes to, and they were designated due to the exam results in junior school. Is it the 11 plus, whatever they used to call it? So my English was quite good.

As far as I loved English, I loved reading, and I could read and write, and I could, which most kids probably can at by 10 or 11 anyway. But I was, I think I was kind of least average on that, with that. Very below average in maths, but they didn't know what to do with me.

And in junior school, didn't really do much in my history or geography that I remember. So it really was kind of an English maths thing. So I was in the middle, lower middle, and then I was in the bottom for, for maths, or below bottom, because it was taken out of, it wasn't even, you know, so maths was taken away.

Possibly another lesson as well, I can't remember. And then, after about a year, they put us back in. I think they realised that, I'm guessing, it was absolutely pointless having us all, putting a bunch of kids in a room on their own, let them do whatever they want.

Especially the naughty kids, because some of the kids were in there because they were naughty, and they refused to do anything. I wasn't in there. See, at this point, I wasn't naughty yet, in maths, because I liked my maths teacher.

In fact, he was one of the nicest, probably one of the nicest human beings I've met in my life. And he had a lovely big beard. And he was just this big, friendly man.

And he actually took time with me to try and explain some of the mathematics stuff. He was called Mr. Johnson. And he had hair like an eagle.

Honestly, he was just really nice, gentle, spoken. And I remember just... I know what I was about to say next, that's what's made me laugh. Okay, I won't, I won't say it.

So yeah, it was, it was lovely. But anyway, he, I was nice. You're already wondering what I was going to say, but I've said it before, actually, I think in a previous recording.

So if you can find that out of all the millions of words that I've said, I say I didn't mess around in that lesson, because I respected him, I liked him. And he was kind. And you know, in that time of my life, you know what I needed? I really, really needed more than anything.

And I didn't, maybe I did know this at the time. I needed kindness. I needed adults, especially adults to be kind.

I could handle kids being whatever they were. I knew what it was like to be around kids. You know, that wasn't, it was nothing new.

No kid could show me anything new. Because I was a kid, and I had, well, two older brothers. You know, I've been to numerous schools, lots of different schools, and too many, probably.

And I also used to live in two different children's homes with kids sleeping in dormitories. Also in the sea cadets with loads of other kids. And I did karate with loads of other kids.

So I knew what it was like to be around kids. Adults, I hadn't had a lot of positive experiences with. So to have a teacher that was really, really kind and gentle, meant something to me.

And, and the only two, well it was three teachers that I really liked. There was one that I did like, I didn't like him anymore after he did something, which was, I thought, inappropriate. Not in a weird way, but in a, from a professional perspective.

I'll tell you about it in a sec. And the three teachers I liked was Mr. Johnson, maths teacher, and then two R.E. teachers, religious education teachers. So it was two.

So I liked R.E. I found it interesting, just, just did, generally. And the first R.E. teacher lent me the Joseph and the Technicolor Rainbow, Rainbow? Rainbow recording, because he played it during the lesson and I just, I just loved it. So he actually let me take it home.

So I got on really well with him, I liked him a lot. And then he left, because we did R.E. all the way through, I think all the way through to the, yeah, for the whole five years. And I think for the last three years, I had a different teacher, I think it was Mrs. Patel, or, I think.

And again, she was brilliant, loved her, because she came from a different perspective, started talking about, like, Hinduism, and I think she might have been a Hindu herself. I can't remember. I just decided, I'm laughing just at something that I remember.

Whenever I think of Hindus, and I think of Sikhs, there's, there's this phoning. This is absolutely true. And no one was being rude or anything.

But this person took it rudely, took it offence. He phoned up. Now, they were talking about the NHS, the National Health Service.

It was on LBC, it was a phoning, this is years ago. A lot of things were years ago. And they were talking about, I don't know, the NHS and some kind of medical thing.

Anyway, so this man phones up. And there's talk, I think they had two conversations going on. There was, you know, sometimes they have it mixed, don't they? So like, phone up about what you want to talk to.

So some, one of it was, the NHS, another one was about religious, religious belief systems when it comes to Western medicine, and stuff like that, how it can sometimes get in the way, for example. Some religions don't believe in blood transfusions, and, you know, things like that. So anyway, this man phones up, this is late night as well.

And he phones up and said, Oh, hello. Oh, yes, whatever his name was. So he said, The first thing he says is, I'm sick.

And the presenter said, I'm sorry to hear that. Hope you feel better soon. And a bloke kicked off proper, like, how dare you make fun of my religion? Like, it sounded honestly, because it wasn't a great phone line.

It sounded like he said he was sick. Because the previous three people that phoned have been talking about illness, and their experience using NHS before that. And then there was another person, there was a person, a Muslim person or Christian, Buddhist, whatever, talking about the NHS and how they, how different it was in Thailand, the health service in Thailand, because you have to pay for it.

But it's, they felt it was a much kinder place to be. And the medical staff were more friendly. So that that's what they were saying.

So there was that kind of thing. So he said, Yeah, anyway, he comes on and says, I'm sick. I'm sick.

The presenter thought he said he was sick. So he said, I'm sorry to hear that. Hope you feel better soon.

And the man went on and on and on and on and on. It was so funny. Because he really believed that the presenter was being rude when he wasn't.

He just, if anything, he was being compassionate. Compassionate. Yes.

So whenever I don't know, I think of Hindus and I think of Sikhs, because was the kind of, I was classed as quite close religion. And yeah, so I said as a lady, the RE teacher, she would start explaining the caste system. And she she used Star Wars analogies.

And that grabbed me like, wow. And she was interested in the occult. She was interested in, you know, like superstitions and all that stuff, which is very, very connected to religion, you know, the origins of religion, believe in something that is doesn't make any sense.

And a lot of religion kind of came from that, you know, believing in, you know, the sun's astrological signs and the nature and just like a lot of superstitions involved in that stuff, ritualistic stuff, which then evolved into the religions that we have today. And it just, I found it very interesting. I really did.

And she was lovely. So I liked her. So that's three teachers I liked.

But the next there's one I thought was cool. And then I didn't like him. Because he did, it was almost like, not social studies, kind of a very free range.

I think this is in the last year of school last, like in the fourth year, whatever, of maybe, I don't know, whatever year. But it was like almost preparation for leaving school or talking about social stuff. It was very open ended kind of no, no exam, no tests, it was more discussion oriented.

Well, I thought it was cool. It was cool. And then one day, he decided to ask a very divided to a very divided task.

And he asked, he gave a piece of paper to everyone. And he wrote on the piece of paper, and he said, write on this piece of paper, if you had to go and stay, if you were going to be stranded, let's say, okay, on a desert island, pick one person out of the class that you would go with you that you'd want to be with you. Now, even then, with my limited brain capacity, I realized that that was cruel, quite a cruel thing to do.

You might not think it's cool, but when you it's different if you're just one person saying, who would you take with you? Well, I'll take him or her. But when the whole class is doing it, it certain people get left out, or certain people have chosen more. And this is I don't know, just I didn't find it very nice experience.

So I put down my friend Dean, obviously, he's my best friend. He was sitting next to me. We were best friends all the way through high school.

And we were best friends for a couple of years of junior school. So we were best friends for like six, seven years. Like, you know, really, really close.

So we put our name. Oh, yeah, we had to read it out. So he said, now everyone read out who you take on the treasure, not treasure island, onto the island.

Who would you take with you? Nobody said my name. Even my best friend didn't say my name. He chose Sarah with a big boobs.

That's who he chose. Didn't want me. I said, we don't know what I'm going to grow and might get bigger.

He said, I can't wait. Like, you obsessed me. So I don't care.

I said, look, we're best friends. We've been best friends for ages. Yeah, I know, but don't like looking at you.

That's a bit rude. You're rude. It was like, come on, man.

We'd have more fun than you'd have with her. And then we both laughed because it was a silly statement. But, you know, it was just, I felt so shallow.

I felt rejected. But I wasn't enough, you know. But I put him down because I thought if you're going to be on an island, you want to be with someone that you like, not someone you fancy.

You want to be with someone that you already know that you do like and you already know you get on with them. Someone that you can have fun with. Like, you know, playing and talking and acting silly.

He just wanted to be with with someone that he fancied. Well, it probably wouldn't have worked out very well because basically all the boys chose Sarah, some of the girls as well. She's very popular.

And she was lovely, actually. I liked her a lot. She was, she was just one of these really, really friendly people.

Nice personality. Just nice, nice person. Plus, she used to be friendly to me as well.

That's what, that's what her plus was. She used to be friendly to me. Never friends with her, but she's always friendly.

Although I did see her a few years after leaving school, we had a conversation. The first conversation we'd ever had. Never had a conversation at school.

It was always like, hello, hello. But she stopped and spoke to me. And I thought, oh, you're so lovely.

Just at that time, I think she'd already had about six children and married and stuff. So, yeah. But you know, I might have, I noticed that when I got older, is sometimes some of the girls from school seemed more friendly to me a little bit.

I remember there was one girl, for some reason, she was, she liked to try and bully me. She had no respect. I think she was the same year as me, I think as well.

And I was going to karate and I got there a bit early. And for some reason, she just was picking on me. Like, and I couldn't do anything because she was a girl.

And she was picking up the pads from my back and she was kicking them around like, you know, I think I brought, I don't know if her brother was at karate. That's why she was there. I don't know.

And, or she was interested in going. Anyway, she sat through, she sat through the lesson, through the, like, it was all training. After that, she showed me nothing but respect.

So, I must have been, I don't know if I was good or if I was, I wasn't quite as rubbish as she thought I was going to be. But after she saw that I could do stuff and I, it's like, she apologized, actually said sorry. Sorry I was so rude and stuff.

And then that was it. And we spent the next 30 years married. It was great.

52 children, 109 grandchildren. It's amazing. And that was by the time I was 20.

Wow. Time goes by. Would I want to harem? I don't know.

So yeah, this teacher that did that experiment of like, oh, who would you take to a, to an island? I didn't like that. Because that was, that was too much kind of, I don't know what the right word is. Rude? Maybe? Yeah.

I wasn't, I wasn't a big fan of him after that. Before that, I thought he was cool. Just seemed like unnecessarily, it's just unnecessary to, to make someone feel so unpopular.

And I really did feel unpopular. Because, you know, the one person I should have relied on, because, you know, most other people, I know I said everyone, everyone chose Sarah. I was exaggerating.

I chose Sarah. I chose Sarah. No, I mean, I think most people just chose their friends.

And a lot, a lot of kids sit next to their best friend if they can in the class. So they choose the friend or maybe they choose the person they were sitting next to. Just, you know, but no, not my friend.

Sarah. Sarah. Oh, Sarah.

Like, crazy. Honestly, I saw one of his Facebook page the other day. There's a picture of Sarah.

I mean, she's 90 now. But he's still obsessed with her. I can't believe it.

It's really weird. I did actually go on to Facebook and I saw his picture. He just doesn't look, doesn't look how, and it's hard to even remember how he looks because it's such a long time ago.

And we kind of drifted apart in the last year of high school. Really. And then once we left school, we hardly ever saw each other.

But he, yeah, he looks happy. So, well, I can only go on photographs. But I imagine he's, he was always very focused.

I think he's been successful. Good for him. Hope he's well and happy.

That was genuine. Did that sound genuine? I meant it. Hope he's well and happy.

That doesn't sound very genuine, does it? I hope he's so happy. Oh, gas. Lovely.

How did they get talking about school? I don't know. So I got my, I think I'm gonna look into joining the gym, local gym. And they do a discount for students.

So I get, am I, can I class myself as a student if the course hasn't actually started yet? Starts in October. I wonder. I don't know.

I might be able to, I might, might be able to get a student discount in October, because I will be a student. Well, all being well, and the student finance going through, I know whether that's happened in August. So that's next month.

There's a cut off date in August, where all the student finance has to be, they have to have it sorted by a certain date, apparently. So that would be good. It's, I'm also thinking maybe, if I find, maybe some kind of voluntary work or something like that.

It's just, yeah, perhaps it's time to start making some more changes. I'm trying to do, I'm trying to make changes and doing the Open University course, doing a degree course, getting more into the exercise of changing my diet. I haven't had any sugar for, blimey, might be three weeks now.

Might well be three weeks. So I had no sugar in my tea or coffee, or my breakfast cereal at all. In fact, I ran out of sugar about two weeks ago, two and a half, three weeks ago.

I've not bought any. So that's quite cool. It still doesn't taste nice, tea, coffee, definitely anyway, doesn't taste nice without sugar, but I'm starting to get used to it.

Yeah, starting to get used to it. And I'm going to be doing, I had two eggs last night. That was the most boring thing I've said all month, I think.

Can you imagine if this was like, do you think anyone, everyone got together, like people listen to these Let Me Bore You To Sleep recordings and there's a big, well, big group, you know, there's a group of people all meeting up and perhaps it was a meet and greet or something like that. And maybe there's six or seven people getting together saying, you know, reminiscing about some of the recordings over the years.

And one person says, do you remember when he, he had two eggs? And someone else says, wow, yeah, I remember that.

That was amazing. Another person said, well, what happened? What happened? Tell me, tell me. I can't wait.

Tell me now. Well, it was a Monday morning. He did a recording.

It was like 1,500 and 1,152, something like that. Off the top of my head. And 1st of June, no, 1st of July, 2,024.

And he mentioned something about eggs. I can't remember what it was. No, I remember, he said he had two eggs.

Oh, yeah. Wow. That's good stuff.

That is. Oh, dear. I don't know if I've ever thought myself as being particularly interesting.

But at the same time, I wasn't really aware of just how boring I can be. It may sound strange that this is some kind of a revelation to me, especially after doing these recordings for over six years. But you know, the Let Me Bore You To Sleep ones.

However, I don't necessarily class myself as being hugely boring. Just maybe mildly, mildly repetitive and temporarily dull, spasmodically redundant. I don't know what that means.

But wow, sounded good. Sounded intelligent. Here's a story I'll tell you.

I'm gonna leave you with this story. There was this girl at school. She was a problem child.

Like every lesson. She was in the, she was in the dances class with me and you know, wherever in the first year. But even after that, every lesson, she didn't do anything.

She didn't say anything. I would swear sometimes she refused to do any work. And if the teacher pushed her, she'd scream and run out.

I don't mean physically pushed up but she is a teacher go too much hassle. She'd lose the plot. Never spoke to me all the way through high school.

And then in the fourth year, part of I don't even know what it was part of. But we had, I don't know what lesson it was in. But we all were put given assignments to do work experience.

It wasn't because I had work experience where I spent two weeks on a building site or with a building firm. That was my work experience. But we also did some regular stuff where we would go out.

I think every Friday afternoon to a thing where some people would choose to go into a restaurant or whatever. And I don't know if I chose or I was just given the thing. But I ended up going to a play group, children's play group.

And everyone had partners so they went with and I was chosen her or she was chosen me. So me and this girl who had never spoken to, she never spoke to the teachers, never said a word to anyone. Okay, yeah, she definitely spoke a little bit outside of school.

But yeah, she hardly didn't really say anything. I thought it was she was just like completely. I don't know what the right word is to say.

But I just I just thought she was extremely odd. And there was something really wrong with her. So we walk in as a really long walk to this assignment.

We'd leave after lunch on a Friday. And I think we were there for about six weeks. The first part of the walk was very awkward, didn't say a thing to each other.

At the end of the six weeks, we were best friends. She was nothing like the person she portrayed when she was at school. She was chatty, she was funny.

Just just a kid, a normal girl, normal person, normal, whatever normal is, you know, but she was just saying she just hated school. Just didn't like school. But outside of school, she was fine.

And we got on really well. And I was the reason I remember that is because you know, this this whole thing is all about first impressions stay, or first impressions stick. Now I realize first impressions are important sometimes, especially in scenarios like job interviews, or, you know, some kind of interview situation.

All you've got is your first impression quite often. Even if you get the job entails having three different interviews, you won't get to the second interview if you don't make an impression, a decent impression on your first interview, obviously, I guess. But generally, I think first impressions only only last only stick if you never see the person again.

Because my experience is people are rarely the same, or really what I think they are. When I first meet them, get to know them a bit. That first impression doesn't mean anything anymore.

And I think I kind of got that from her like, and that wasn't just the first impression because I was seeing it every day, daily for years. And she's just always quiet and grumpy and rude. And then I realized that's not what she was.

That's what she was when she was in school, outside of school. She was nice. And yeah, we're still married now.

It's great. I wonder if anyone's ever really imagine the people took me seriously. Like, how could you be married to 14 different people in one recording? You've got 92 children, 130 grand, and you're only 20.

And how can that be? How can it be? I don't understand. So, I'm going to go now. I've been talking for a long, long, long time.

A long time. Yes. Thank you for listening.

Remember to be kind to yourself. Remember, check out my YouTube channel. And also, Q&A Friday is coming up again.

This Friday. So if you've got any questions, so thank you very much. Remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve to be happy.

Remember to be gentle with yourself. Lots of love. Bye.