(no music) #1107 - I tried editing out all the farts - Let Me Bore You To Sleep (30th April 2024)

Hello and welcome. Okay, you want the bone, blimey. You knew it was in my pocket, didn't you? What I did is, because whenever I do a recording, he always wants something.

So I went into the kitchen and I got my packet of food, but I also sneakily put one of his little bones into my pocket. And he ate the food, because if I'd have given him the bone first, he'd have had that and he'd have ignored the food. So he had his food first.

It's all gone. And he's been waiting patiently, just staring at me for about 10 minutes. And I don't know if you can hear him.

You want to make some noise for everyone? Do you want it? Do you want it? Do you want it? You don't want it, do you? Okay, don't worry. I'll just talk. You'll hear him.

So welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name's Jason Newland. And please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

He's begging now. He's on his two feet with his paws up. I can't see his face.

Do you want this Vinnie? There you go. Oh, beautiful little thing. So first of all, I want to say thank you to Tammy.

Thank you for your PayPal gift. I always send you a personal message, but thank you. So thank you very much.

I think I need to fart. No, I didn't. But Vinnie did.

It was Vinnie. Vinnie. Damn it.

That didn't really work, did it? That wasn't me. I didn't fart. I forget that happened.

I had pains in my stomach today. So it's been quite a busy day, really. I did, I got up about three o'clock in the morning and spent the first, I just spent about an hour editing the podcast from the night before.

And it normally takes a little bit longer. So I did quite well. So I edited it.

I didn't manage to upload all of the recordings to the different places during that period. But I did the editing, the processing. And then I had my breakfast at, I think, four o'clock.

And while that was happening, I was uploading. So I don't have to do anything as far as the uploading kind of does itself, if that makes sense. It takes a while, though, to do.

And then I think by about 5.30, I went back and had a, what was it, six, 5.30, whatever. I had a little nap. Vinnie was still in bed the whole time.

And then we got up and I did a bit more stuff online. And I took him out for his first walk of the day, about 10 to 8 this morning. And he didn't want to go to the park.

He wanted to go different directions. So I thought, okay, I'll just follow him. No, he did go through the, no, that's it, went towards the park.

And then for some reason, he wanted to stay on the pavement. And then he led me across the road through an alleyway. Well, he doesn't normally do that.

So I just followed him and he led me into the fields. So we crossed the road, went into the field. There's a huge amount of fields all around, like once you get there, it's only a few minutes away.

So I let him off the lead and he's running around and just sniffing everything. And, you know, he's, I mean, we went into the field yesterday as well. He did three poos, three separate poos.

And he didn't even do one while we were in the field today. And I think he might have done one afterwards. I can't remember.

So we're walking around, go around the field. It's a lovely day. It's really, really fresh.

And I've still got my jacket on though. And it's a little bit, I think it's a little bit too warm for the jacket. It's getting there.

If it gets, if it gets warmer, I'm going to have to actually literally not wear anything underneath. Because I've got nothing, I've got no jacket to wear. So I don't know what to do.

It's because I had planned the beginning of the year. It wasn't so much a New Year's resolution, but it was a, you know, an idea is to maybe lose some fat, not bothered about weight, but lose some fat so that I can have a summer body. I haven't had a summer body since probably 2004, to be honest.

But even 2006, I was okay. Because I'm still a lot lighter than I am now. But you know, anyway, so I kind of decided, you know, get a little bit, try and get myself a little bit of a summer body so I can walk around, maybe even in a t shirt.

Which is something that I would never do. You know, not since 2006. Well, it's not totally true.

I sometimes walk around in a t shirt, but generally I don't. Well, I realized yesterday that I just forgot to do it. I've forgotten to lose weight.

And it's now nearly May. It's the 30th of April, 2022. And I've like completely forgot to do it.

Because I've just been busy, you know, well, I don't know with what, but just generally dealing with things. But it's my belly, really. That's the only thing.

I mean, I probably could do with tightening up my chest. My boobs are probably a little bit, not quite as firm as they used to be. And my buttocks, I can still tense the muscles in my buttocks individually.

That sounds weird, but I can. Even sitting down, I can tense the right one, then the left one, right one, left one, then the middle one. But I just kind of, I can do that with my bosoms as well.

But it's not, you know, it's not quite as good as they used to be. But it's all right. I might maybe get back to this.

I don't want to make myself laugh. Getting back to do some press ups and sit ups and stuff. The weird thing about it is, I could do 100 leg raises.

You know, when you lay on your back, and you just raise your legs up, you have to hold, you put your hands underneath your bum or whatever, just to keep your hands down. I could do 100 of them. So I do have muscles in my stomach.

And sit ups, I pretty much have to, I mean, I don't know, I have to hold my breath when I cut my toenails. It's not because they smell so bad. That's part of the reason.

But it's, you know, I can't reach my toes without holding my breath. So I don't know. Perhaps I need to go to a chiropractor or whatever it is to get my toenails clipped.

Who knows. So I, today is Tuesday. And tomorrow is Wednesday.

Today I have, this is something that I'm still thinking about. So I'm still been working on the Zen, Zencast. Transferring the individual podcasts over to there.

Still keeping the main ones where they are, but just transferring the ones that are basically getting no views, no plays, because there's no music on them and stuff. So now I've been doing that and I've spent a lot of yesterday and today working on the Sleepy Boring Objects. I've got about five more to do, or six more to do.

And then it's completed that podcast. Apart from the written description and tags. Tags, that's another thing I need to do.

But I can do them another time. So all I need to do is just a few more little bits, take probably about 20 minutes, and then it's done. And then I can put the RSS feed and reconnect it or redirect it rather on Apple Podcasts.

And that'll be four shows that I'll have done. ASMR, Let Me Bore You To Sleep. And Jason's Bedtime Storytime, Stop Smoking Hypnosis, and now Sleepy Boring Objects.

The thing is, how can I put this? Oh, I'm tired. I really should do these podcasts earlier in the day. I don't know if it's really worth the hassle with all this stuff.

Like giving attention to the older stuff, the old podcasts. I don't know, maybe I should just say, you know what? Let Me Bore You To Sleep, that's it. It's the only one that I'm going to be focusing on.

I just don't know. I don't know. Because part of the Let Me Bore You To Sleep also involves the Bedtime Storytime.

So I always include those in that podcast anyway. It also includes the Sleepy Boring Objects. So it's, you know what I mean? I think I also include Let Me Bore You To Sleep on there as well.

And also the ASMR, Let Me Bore You To Sleep. So those other four podcasts also get included in the Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast, because they're all connected. I know the Let Me Bore You To Sleep is a different thing, but it's still the same, the same format.

And the Bedtime Storytime is just me being silly. Sleepy Boring Objects is, it's pretty much an identical thing as what I do with these Let Me Bore You To Sleep ones, except I'm more focused on a particular object or subject. So if I decide to talk about Wellington Boots, for example, I will stick to that subject kind of.

Admittedly, I've not listened back to any of the recordings, so I don't know if I do stick to the subject. But I try and make sure I come back to the subject. Yeah, I'm not sure.

I don't know. I don't know kind of what to do. I'm not sure.

Um, what do you reckon? Anyone? Any ideas? Bedtime Storytime? Bedtime Storytime? Images? Podcasts? Bedtime Storytime? Three Bear. Okay. All right.

Okay. Downloads. Downloads.

Story. I wonder. Bedtime Storytime.

I should have moved these. PGN file. 10 hours.

Jason's Bedtime Storytime. Earlier this year. Yeah.

Nope. That didn't work. Yeah.

Storytime. Sorry, I just realized I got distracted. So I'm just, I'm not sure.

I'm not sure what to do. Any ideas? I think I'd be better off if I was able to focus and just say, you know what? You know what? Well, not focus in the sense of focus, because that's not really something that I tend to do anyway. Probably as much as would be expected from an adult.

However, I don't know. I don't know. What do you reckon? Jason's Bedtime Storytime.

Well, that's weird. It's just disappeared. That's strange.

Oh, well. So I don't know. What do you think? Should I just stick to the Let Me Boyd Asleep and do one of them every day and focus on that? But then there's that little niggle of like, well, you know? Am I helping people? Because, you know, I'm not doing this just to entertain myself.

Although I do tend to entertain myself in a weird way. That's not why I'm doing it. It's not the reason.

Oh, by the way, if you want to see a funny picture, Hillary posted a picture of her doggy, and I won't spoil it for you, but it's on Jason Newland's Boring Group. It's a funny picture. So I today, so I took him for a walk in the field.

I got back about just before nine o'clock, so he was out for about an hour. And then, yeah, I worked on some more stuff. As I said, I've been working on the Sleepy Boring Objects podcast.

So I've been doing that. And then I had a phone call from a friend. So I spoke to him for, I don't know, 20 minutes or something.

Then I spoke to my friend's dad for a while as well. Not long after that, and then I, what else did I do? I don't know. It feels like the day went quite quick, because it's now 20 to eight in the evening.

And I don't, I feel like I've been busy. I mean, to be fair, yeah, because I was uploading recordings all day. So it's quite time consuming doing that.

There's not a lot involved in it. It's just like sitting here, uploading, putting title in, and just clicking different buttons and stuff and waiting for it to upload and then saving it, and then uploading the next one and you know, like that. And because that podcast has, let's have a look.

So number 25, number 25. This one has, oh, they've all been uploaded. 35, there's 138 episodes.

So it's 35 all together. 138, including the different, different types. So I've still got 10, 10 images to upload.

So 10 times by force is 40, blimey. So it won't be finished today, but I'll get it done tomorrow. It's probably another hour, probably to do that much, maybe, maybe a couple of hours to do that.

Or should I just wave goodbye to them and focus on this? I don't know. What do you think? Any ideas? You know, I don't know. Do you know? I don't know.

Do you know? Do you know? I don't know. He's got his very impressive little friend out at the moment. He's just looking at me like, so.

Fair enough. Blimey. It would be the world's biggest one if it was human.

Blimey, you're, you're a good boy. You are. He's a good boy.

He's got so much, so much love in him to give to basically everyone but me. He's got so much. He just loves meeting new people.

And you know, what was a bit weird though, we went into the, we were going to the park this afternoon. Oh, we've got new neighbors slamming the doors downstairs. And every time they do it, Vinnie barks.

But I don't know if it's so much about the door slamming as opposed to which door is being slammed. Because it's my friend that used to live down there. And now new people have moved in.

And I think, I don't know, I can't read his mind. But I'm imagining that he, he knows the sound of that door. And he thinks that my friend is going to come up and see him.

Because that was his uncle. He loved seeing him. He saw him every day.

Super excited to see him. He used to go into his flat most days as well. But of course, you know, he can't see him anymore.

So and he can't see his other friend, Logie, because Logie's not around anymore. He's moved. He's not moved on.

He's, he's living in a new home now. Vinnie hasn't seen him since the end of February. Yeah, end of February.

So it's a January, November, December. No, end of January, not February, end of January. Anyway, February, March, April, so it's three months.

So yeah. And this, I spoke to my friend's dad, there's some personal stuff I can't say, I can't talk about it on here. But my friend Luke, his family are really going through it.

What was that? Someone's slamming. His family is like members of his family are ill and really sad. I wish that you know, when you feel like I wish you could do something, but I can't, there's nothing I can do.

I just wish I could wish I could. I said to his dad, like, because it's his niece and that he's done well. And I said, I know, I just feel just wish I could wave a wand and, and just make things almost make things stop.

Just like, okay, that's enough now. This family has had enough now. That's enough.

You know, just just give them a break. Because they've really been, they've really gone through it for quite a long time now. Since the end of November, we've been seen before that.

But since the end of November, it's just come on. Anyway, I don't like to be all serious on here. So I just wish them all well.

I hope that they'll be okay. I suppose I'm thinking about him because the friend I spoke to who phoned me is actually also a really good friend of his as well. Of Luke.

So we were talking about him and, and then another one of his friends came around yesterday and we were talking about him. And then I'm talking and I'm on the phone to Luke's dad and we were talking about him. So I'm kind of I guess, and I saw someone in the park and we were talking about him.

Someone else that used to know. And then coming back, someone else that used to know him, who I didn't know, I don't know very well, but he used to work at the petrol station. And I didn't recognize him to start with.

And he's saying old condolences for your friend and like, Oh, thank you. It's only when I got home. Oh, yeah, I realized who he was.

The thing is, because when, when they stand behind the counter of the petrol station, they're much taller, the people because it's higher up. I didn't realize this really until today. I did just it clicked because one of the blokes I see regularly, I saw him in the park, we were talking for about an hour in the park.

And I realized he's only a little bit taller than me. But in there, he looks about six, four. And this bloke that I saw outside, he used to work there.

He looked really tall. I mean, he's not he's not sure he's probably is about six, six, one, six foot six, one or something. But he looks just so much taller.

As I as well. I don't necessarily categorize people by height. But it comes into it, doesn't it? If you if you think someone's really, really tall, and you see them from a distance, or you see them in a different environment, it is a little bit old.

No, he's the same person. Maybe. I don't know.

Is is any of what I'm saying true? I think it is. So yeah, I started thinking about Luke. And I know I call him my friend downstairs.

I never named him when he lived here. I've got one one friend downstairs where he was my friend. And yeah, he still is my friend.

But anyway, so I guess that's why I'm thinking, thinking of him. So that kind of took up a lot of my day today. And I was talking to the other bloke who was in the park.

And it's weird because I walk into the park with Vinnie. And this is about 20 to three in the afternoon, might maybe even late earlier than that. About 20 to three.

So I purposely go there so I can avoid the school, the people picking up kids and stuff. So I just keep out of the way of that. So I was going to get him taken for a quick walk.

And let's get back home. So I'm not in the way. And as I walk around the corner, I hear dogs barking.

So I think okay, so I keep him on a short, the lead short just in case. You never know what's around the corner, do you? Literally in life. So I go around the corner and there are five adults and four dogs, all huddled around chatting.

And the dogs are barking. Two of the dogs are barking. And one started barking at Vinnie.

Vinnie started barking back like he was just they're just talking to each other, I guess. All five of the adults ignored me. We ignored him, completely ignored him like we weren't even like we were invisible.

And Vinnie went up because I've got seven meters on my lead. Exaggeration. But yeah, showing off.

So I've got seven meters so he can go quite ahead of me. I didn't let him have the whole length. And he he didn't get close, right close to them.

But close enough for them to like look around say, oh, oh, whoa, whoa. Why would they go? Oh, whoa. You know what I mean? Like to acknowledge.

And they still didn't. Completely blanked us. Five adults and four dogs.

Normally in that scenario. People let all the dogs off and they run around, not this lot. And I'm standing there chatting.

And we walked all around the field. Occasionally look over. Mind you, you can't really.

The thing is, you can't start with someone staring at me because the only way you know someone's staring at you is if you're staring at them. He keeps looking at me. Yeah.

How do you know that? Because I keep looking at him. Exactly. So the and I'm walking back.

I was like, I've got to walk past them now. And I was still standing there. So it's good.

I'm not a quick walker. Walker. I'm not.

I don't walk very quickly. So probably about 15 minutes. We're walking around the park, that part of the park, maybe 10, 12 minutes.

And we walk back. They're heading towards the to walk around them. And I thought this still like, I know what that is.

They don't. Is it me? Is it Vinnie? Is it? Is it because he's such a scary looking dog? It's the size of a cat. He's the size of a size of quite a large cat, house cat, you know? In fact, I've seen house cats bigger than him.

Anyway, he's like a squirrel. He's basically like a lot. He's a he's a dog.

He's a beautiful dog. Anyway, I so I'm walking back and I see my friend who works at the petrol station coming in with his dog. But he was holding I couldn't see who it was.

I could see it was a big black dog. But from the distance, I couldn't see my eyesight doesn't reach that far. And then as he starts to walk closer, his face becomes more focused a little bit enough for me to Oh, it's him.

So I shout, please be my friend. I'm lonely. And he came over and we hugged and we chatted for about an hour just by boxing mainly and then led to other stuff, you know, conversations can and it was quite nice.

His dog. Oh, she's lovely. It's a big old dog.

And it howls like a wolf. I'm talking a wolf like view. You watch any movie with the sounds of wolves.

And that's what this dog sounds like. Oh, that I realized that pretty sounding like an owl. But you know, I'm not ventriloquist.

You know, can't do all sounds. But he is she is she's really lovely, big. Now Vinnie, a few months ago Vinnie saw we saw him in the park again.

And Vinnie barked the whole time at this big dog. In the end, I just had to say I'll see you later. Because he was he was annoying me so much because I couldn't hear what the bloke was saying over him.

Yeah, yapping for about 10 minutes. So I just came home. But today he had a little bit of a bark and then he was I think I think he was just grateful that he saw a dog in a park that wanted to say hello.

Or that he was allowed to say hello to because there was four dogs literally probably 50 yards away that weren't probably less than 50. You know what? As an aside, I'll come back to this story in a minute. Because I got seven meters on my lead.

I now seem to think I know what meters are. And I try to work it out. I think well, that's 100 meters away.

They don't think no, because I've only got seven meters to play with. And 100 that's 10 10 times plus whatever else. And now it's more than that.

So I can't I can't judge distances like that. So yeah, I did have a really good business idea though, which would also make the roads much much safer. But I won't mention it because I don't know.

I'd mention it if I thought there was someone out there that could make it happen. And I could perhaps make some money out of it. That'd be nice.

But to be fair, make it happen. I don't care even if I don't make any money. That makes the road safer.

It's worth it. But it'd be nice to make a little bit of money. It'd be nice to have an income income.

Apparently, the government are going to try and take away benefits from anyone. So people that have got mental health issues, such as bipolar like myself. So it might be things might be changing soon.

Things are always changing anyway, aren't they? So it might come to a point where I'm just sitting there. Just like, Oh, well, we're going to eat. I have to walk up to the soup kitchen.

And yeah, that's gonna be interesting times. I lose weight though. I definitely lose weight if I have to walk all the way into town.

I'm back three times a day to get food. Because you can get food. There's no, no one has to go hungry in this area.

Anyway, if you're willing to travel to get there, I know not everyone can physically do that. I know that I realize that. But I think I would struggle to walk that distance because of my back.

But you know that if it's a case of doing it or not eating, I would do it I guess. And there's places you can eat during the day as well. I think a couple of churches have food.

And you can get food thingies food parcels from the food bank, as well as every night there's a soup kitchen. And I think they even have a there's I don't know if it's once a month or every two weeks. There's a Sikh charity that cooks food for people and brings food.

And the reason I know about this is because you know, knowing me being Mr. Perfect, I actually used to volunteer the soup kitchen for a little while. Mr. Is there anything you've not done to help humanity? I can't think of anything. No, I didn't do it for long.

They didn't. I did it in in my previous town. And you used to make sandwiches at home, soup, and then coffees and tea, but soup kitchens.

I mean, first of all, not kitchen. This didn't even have tables in this town where I lived before. It was putting stuff on a wall outside a church, or a church wall, basically.

And people would just come and just don't know how to really explain it. It would be like a frenzy. And not everybody would get fed.

Sometimes. So that that kind of I found that a little bit frustrating, because I just wanted to make sure everyone was everyone was treated the same. But those that How weird is this? How weird is this? I just clicked on the news website, the local news website.

What's the headline? Soup kitchen looking for a new home with square underground revamp. Well, I'm not with square. So with the square undergoing revamp.

So the place where it's currently at, it's about to undergo a revamp. So looking for somewhere else to home it somewhere else to lay the tables out and do the soup soup run. What are the chances of that happening of seeing that? That's weird.

Genuine and I've been on this website already today because I go on every day. So I'm waiting to see about the coroner's report from a friend. So that was not a headline earlier.

This is a new headline. Blimey. Wow.

It's not about the it's not like wow about the soup garden needs a new home. It's just like I'm talking about it. And then yeah, that was strange.

Wow. Blimey. Anyway, okay.

That's very just that is isn't that what do you think that's a bit weird? That maybe maybe not then. Maybe not. I'm trying to look at his thing.

This stupid thing is trying to get me to sign up. All I want to do is just read what it says. But no, must sign up to read it.

Why? No way. Sometimes it just lets me read it and other times like it does that. So yeah, in the Ipswich one, I mean, in in the in the one here, where I live now, it's well, I say where it was because they're moving it.

The it's really well organized. I mean, the one before is probably well organized now as well. Because it's a lot a long time ago.

That was 2000. I don't know. 2004.

I think. So yeah, I think most of the soup kitchens, or the soup runs, I've never heard of called a soup run before. I think are run by organized by churches.

As far as I know, again, I might be wrong. But the ones I've I know, I've seen have been run by churches. What it's like in other parts of the country? I don't know.

I reckon. I imagine there's lots of different ones run by lots of different organizations. I'm guessing.

Why am I talking about that? Anyway? I don't know. There must be a reason. Why? Ever wonder like? Do you think I'd be better off if I actually had a subject matter? Like, this is what I'm going to discuss.

Do you realize? Oh, man, do you? I've actually you might wonder what would the recording be like? What would one of my podcasts be like? If I actually edit out edited out the what someone classes nonsense? Well, I did this recently. In a well, it's actually a hypnosis recording. It was one of the sleep hypnosis daily ones.

And me talking at the beginning and all that stuff. It reduced it by about 15 minutes. If I got rid of the nonsense from a Let Me Bore You To Sleep episode.

The only the only sensible part would be the actual introduction, I guess. Yeah, I'd be like 30 seconds long and I'll be it. So I don't know.

I'm just so full of questions. Oh, he's loving this little bone. Yeah, darling.

So I need to eat something last night. Did I speak to my brother before or after I did the recording? I think I spoke to him afterwards. And I was on the phone for about I don't know how long.

Let me have a look. How long was on the phone for? So I need basically what it is I spoke to him the other day. No, I texted him.

I phoned him twice, two different times. As opposed to like one after another, you know, two different days. And he sent me a message saying, what did he say? Let's have a look.

Go away. Who is this? Sorry, been a bit of sad times with a few things. So like, okay, I'll try and call you soon to catch up.

Hope you're okay. So I'm like, that's a bit vague, in a sense of sad times. Like, okay.

So I started to, I started to be a bit concerned if I'm honest with you. A little bit concerned. And I thought I just thought about it.

And I thought, you know what, I will give him a call. And I phoned him. I phoned him up last night.

Because you know, I'm concerned about him. And I tried to explain this to him. I said, regardless of what's going on in your life, regarding other people, I know that that's a huge thing that affects us, when other people are going through it and that.

But ultimately, I just want to make sure that you're okay. And but then it's like, well, yeah, but we are just I don't know. There was there was some logic until it came out my mouth.

So I phoned him up last night. I said, look, I'm I had to call you because just worried I was concerned after the message you sent. And I didn't know what to think about it.

And I just needed to speak to you and to just find out if you're okay. And he said, are you trying to talk like that famous actor? I said, what do you mean? Talk like who? He said, Christopher, whatever his name is. Christopher, what? I don't get what you're talking about, my brother.

It's not really working, is it? No, not really. So Christopher Lam, Christopher Plummer, no, Christopher Biggins, Christopher Biggins. That's funny in the UK, Christopher Biggins.

This is something I said, no, I'm not trying to talk like him. I just want to find out if you're if you're okay. He said, anyway, we had a conversation.

And he's okay, kind of, but, you know, I can't go into his details, but it's. Yeah, he's going through a lot of stuff. You know, just just life, really life stuff.

And I was even though, you know, he's struggling, I was just pleased that he's not. I just I don't know, I just thought it was I kind of thought the worst in a way. I didn't tell him what I was thinking, but he he's he's going to be all right.

I'm pretty certain. And he said, you're worried about me? I said, yeah. So why did you wait six days to phone me then? After I texted you? So well, you know, I wasn't as worried as I guess I'm making out.

But I was concerned. I just I thought I'd leave it for him to phone me, you know, because he said he was going to call or whatever. But then when he didn't, I thought, well, it's been a few weeks now, or a few days or whatever.

And I just like, okay, I better just check up on him. But yeah, he's gonna be all right. He's a really clever boy.

And he's not a boy anymore. But to me, he's always going to be a little boy to me. Because I was eight when he was born.

So to me, he's always going to be that seven year old, eight year old, annoying little kid. And he's now what is it? If he's eight years younger than me, and I'm 53. Or does that make him 45? Yeah, he's 45 years old.

He's 45 years old. 45. Oh, it's weird.

My bottle. My bottle of wort just heckled me. Yeah, it's just I've started to wonder.

Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Yeah, I just not sure what to do about the podcasts if I'm honest. I got hiccups. I got you I got very sleepy hiccups.

Well, they are lazy. I had a hiccup at two and then it just stopped. Even I'm so lazy, even my hiccups can't be bothered to do their job.

Did you know? Did you know? Just been watching a YouTube video about well, it's actually a clip from a from a radio show. And there's a scientist or a I don't know what astronomer or whatever. Physicist, he has discovered out on it in a different solar system, a planet two and a half times bigger than this planet with the same gases on it that we that life on this kind of this that life produces.

So there's certain gases ammonia or I don't know what it was called, but only living species produces that. But on this planet is I think about I think he said is there's 40% that is twice as much twice as much of that gas on that planet there is on this planet. Which means there could be twice as many people or living beings as there is here.

So now the major what is it called? The world's world's most powerful world most powerful passport? Blimey. Isn't it weird? So I put a put in word world's most powerful into Google. Now it's not Google, it's Microsoft.

And now it's like coming up world's most powerful passport, world's most powerful laser pointer, world's most powerful people. And some others things world's most powerful laser, world's most powerful computer, world's most powerful countries, world's most powerful flashlights. Now far down it goes.

I said, there's a couple of others, but they're not. I don't want to talk about them. Oh, so the world's most powerful passport is the United Arab Emirates, UAE.

It now holds the world's most powerful passport, according to the latest data from Latitudes 2000. I didn't know there was one of these Latitudes 2024 passport index. It's like the charts of passports, I guess it's the the updated charts.

Now number 10, number nine, number eight, number one, this week's number one, the United Arab Emirates, Emirates, Emirates. So the UAE passport grants its citizens visa free access. Wow, really? To 182 countries worldwide.

What? How? How does that work? How do I get one? Click on that one. The world's most powerful passport in 2023 is held by Japan for the fifth consecutive year. Well, this is weird.

Now they're talking about Japan. The holders of the Japanese passport can visit an impressive 193 out of 227 global destinations visa free. South Korea and Singapore share the second place on the passport index with a free visa or visa on arrival score of 192.

These passports allow their citizens to access 192 nations without restrictions. Really? Germany and Spain. So Deutschland and Espana.

Did I do that right? Espana and Deutschland. Yeah. jointly hold the third position granting visa access to 190 destinations.

This doesn't make sense to me. Please note that I mean, the words make sense. And the order the words are in makes sense.

But what do they mean by visa free? And you know, visa free access? What does it mean? You can go to any country and stay for as long as you want. And surely that's not the case. I mean, from Germany and Spain as well.

Unless that's part of the European Union, they're included in that one. But then all the countries in Europe would be the same, wouldn't they? Surely, like France and other places. I can't think of any.

How does my country's passport rank? Okay. Searching for the most accurate for your country's passport. Oh, it's now giving me that the 2024 global passport power rank.

So in 2024, United Arab Emirates is number one now. France is number two, France, Germany, Italy. So we do it in a proper way.

So Frank, Deutschland, Italia, Netherlands, I don't know how to say that in Netherlands. Luxembourg, Espana, Austria, Switzerland. I'm not sure how to say Austria and Switzerland in the mother tongue.

But France is... I had it. It's gone. France, Francis, Francine, Frank, Frank, Frankie, Frankie.

Do you remember me, Frankie? And Deutschland, Germany, Italia, Italy, Espana, Spain. See, you didn't realise I was so educated, did you? Oh, what? Oh, man, what's going on here? Oh, that was just something I was... Okay, anyway, I'll ignore that. So yeah, I don't know.

I don't know what new... I don't know. It's interesting, kind of. Oh, this is interesting.

This is the ideal age gap for a relationship that lasts. It's got a picture of Leonardo DiCaprio. I mean, he's famous for many things.

But having relationships with people even close to his own age is not one of them. And good luck to him as well, I say. I couldn't care.

But people make a big deal about it. They don't... It's just like, who cares? I mean, it's... As long as everyone involved is happy. Isn't that really what matters? Isn't that really... So, interesting to figure out.

Let's have a look. Most people feel seven years younger than they are. Apparently, after analysing 3,000 people, this is in MSN... Oh, this is in The Independent.

There's a clip from The Independent. After analysing 3,000 people, it found that couples with a five-year age gap are 18% more likely to split up than those of the same age. 3,000 people, okay.

What's this? Seven... Over seven billion people on the planet. And where was this conducted? Emory University in Atlanta. So, I'm guessing that... Well, I mean, I don't know, because being on... If it was online, it could have encompassed lots of different countries.

But if it was just going by America, then it's going to be different from Spain, or India, or... You know, different countries are going to be different, I guess. And there's countries where arranged marriages still happen, and people marry for different reasons. It's not solely based on, you know, liking each other.

It's like a lifelong commitment with some people. So, I don't know. Not with me.

I can't remember. I don't know how to... I used to have a relationship. I'm sure I did.

I can't remember. It's been so long. Age is just a number.

You can't help who you fall for. It's not as ecclesiastical. It's not.

It's true. You can't. You should have an age-appropriate relationship.

Like, well, for who? That's weird. Drunk man injured and arrested after kicking a bison. That's a random thing.

I don't know what he should have done. He's stuck him in a cage with a bison. Okay, there's a big fraud about Leonardo DiCaprio's dating history, or Roberto De Niro recently becoming a father to seven.

Age 79. They make it like he's just had seven kids. He's recently become a father again.

Why don't you just look at that? Because he has seven other kids. The youngest is 25 years old. So it's not like he's got seven kids and they're all under 10.

You know what I mean? Like, he's recently become a father to seven aged 79. How can he become a father to seven kids aged 79? I'm getting a sense of pedanticism coming from me. De Niro's girlfriend, Tiffany Chen, is 45.

Now, she's doing well as well, isn't she? I mean, some people can't, you know, not always have kids when they get past a certain age. I don't know what it is, but I'm going to keep quiet now. I've just realized that's a rabbit hole I don't want to go down.

So DiCaprio, I realize like, oh, I'm pulling back out of that one. Nope, I'm not going there. While DiCaprio, 48 years old, is notorious for appearing to avoid dating anyone over the age of 25.

Okay, so that's what they're saying. But then you've got France's President Emmanuel Macron, aged 45, was elected in 2017. Not really relevant when he was elected, was it? Is it really? Was he 45, was elected? He's 45 now.

So he was elected in 2017. And people see the way they put these sentences together. So what does this read? When France's President Emmanuel Macron, 45, was elected in 2017, people were shocked that his wife, Brigitte Drogneau, was 25 years his senior, now age 70.

45, 55, 65, so okay, yeah, it's 25. See, things like that don't shock me. I generally don't see any.

It's like, so whose business is it? Whose business? It's quite ironic because when you look at Macron's wife, she's 70. She don't look like any 70 woman I've ever seen in my life. No 70 year old person.

She looks about 40. In fact, she looks younger than him. Not that I'm judging on her appearance, which clearly I am, I suppose, but I've not really seen.

I mean, it's France doesn't really, it's not, again, I've got to back out of that one. I'm not saying France doesn't count. I mean, it's, there's so much going on.

Okay, what I'm saying, there's so much going on in this country, as I'm sure there is in your own country, politically, there's enough going on to keep me occupied. Let's put it this way. We're in an election year this year.

So there's a lot of like all these, these new promises, including, you know, get stopping unemployment and stopping people from getting paid and whatever. So there's this new thing now where they're trying to send, trying to push forward a, the government, the current government that will be out in a few months, they try to put through this bill, trying to get it so that they can transport immigrants or illegal immigrants, or I don't know, whatever you want to call them, what they call them to from here, they've traveled here from other countries via the channel.

Well, from France, basically, to Rwanda.

And they got this, they spend like 200 or 300 million pounds putting this whole thing together. And they're only allowed to send a few hundred, you know, some like per year or something, they've got some sort of guidelines. And it turns out that Rwanda, this, I don't know how much this is true.

But I listened to a phoning show on the radio, that bit's true. And I was lying in bed, that bit's also true. And I was giving it my full attention.

That's not true. Vinnie was next to me. Yeah, it was true.

And this, this whole story I'm telling has gone on way too long. That's also true. Someone phoned in saying, well, I actually live in Rwanda.

He didn't say it like that. He said, well, I live in Rwanda, I know. Actually, as it happens, he said, all this new accommodation has been put together.

At least 60% of it, has been housed with local people. And the local people don't want these refugees going over there. Because they thought it was for them.

I don't know if it's true. I mean, it's true that he said this on the radio, whether it's true or not. But what's happened is, I'll just read the ever since they kind of said that they're definitely going to go ahead with it.

What are they called? Refugees. Asylum. It's not illegal refugees.

Illegal asylum seekers. Refugees can't be illegal, can they really? But even can asylum, I don't know. Apparently anyone that comes over on a boat without a passport, without a visa, without a mobile phone, whatever they chuck into the sea on the way here, is no proof of identification and stuff.

They are generally classed as illegal. Now, it's kind of a touchy subject. Then you look at every, and I do mean every other country in the world, pretty much.

You know, you try and enter another country. Just, you know, you just, you know, you know, you know. Some of the strictest laws, Australia, and Australia, just loads, Australia is one of them.

But America, loads of countries, very strict laws when it comes to entering into the country. I say Australia because we were the government were trying to copy some of the things that Australia have done. And to combat the sort of people coming into the country, we should say uninvited.

You know, I don't have any, any emotions about this thing, personally. But, see, people say, oh, I don't want to be on the side of refugees. I've lived, basically, in a refugee, not a refugee camp, but there, a lot of the, there's a local hotel here that was shut down.

The government took it over and housed, well, filled it with refugees that were awaiting processing or something. So, and some of the locals, like, all that, yeah. Well, I lived in the YMCA in 2001, and I had a little bed, like studio, studio flat, and pretty much the whole building was taken over and I'd say, 75%, at least, maybe 80% of the people living there were refugees from Afghanistan and places like that.

So, it's like, this is all right. We're making such a big deal about it. And there'd be all this stuff in the newspapers and I'd be at work and there'd be people talking about it.

Like, I didn't say anything, but like, I lived there myself. It's all right. You know, it's cheap rent, 65 pound a week, you know.

So, it's like, they're just, they're humans, man, humans. But apparently, this is quite, well, I don't know if it's funny or not. So, look, I read, I heard on the news, okay, this is, I don't know if it's true or not, but here's the headlines.

This is on Sky, so who knows if it's, it says, more than half of asylum seekers allocated for removal to Rwanda cannot be found, according to the government's own report. So, this was today's headlines. More than half of the asylum seekers allocated for removal, I just repeated it, almost 6,000 people were due to be issued a notice of intent that their asylum claim was inadmissible, but just over 2,000 are, but just over, but just over 2,000 are able to be tracked down.

That's weird that they've done that, isn't it? So, instead of saying three quarters have gone missing, they said, so they've almost undersold it. Oh, no, okay, here we go. So, these are the actual numbers, the proper numbers.

5,700 asylum seekers were going to be sent. 2,143 attend regular check-ins and can be located for detention, but it's unclear whether 3,557 have gone. And then, there was this, this thing that was on the news yesterday.

Well, what? Okay, I won't read that. Blimey, isn't that weird? You know, you put in something and something else comes up and it's like, really? That is, well, I'm going to put them on gone missing. I found this kind of quite funny.

I don't know why. Okay, Ireland threatens, Ireland, the Ireland of Ireland, threatens to return asylum seekers to the UK, sparking diplomatic squabble. And the reason for this, okay, because I don't know if you know, there's the political, I'm not laughing, I just, I really didn't understand this when I was a kid.

And on the news, they'd have the weather at the end of the news, on the TV, and there'd be the news in Wales, Scotland, England, and Northern Ireland, but no weather in Ireland. And I thought, what, do they all live underground? Or what's going on? Why? Why is there no weather in Ireland? I was a little kid, you know, so I didn't understand what was going on.

So why are they not giving us the weather for Ireland? And the reason because Northern Ireland is classed as part of the UK.

So what's happened is refugees, apparently, the asylum seekers are now traveling to Ireland. So instead of coming to the UK, into England rather, they're traveling to Ireland. And also, I heard something that people are traveling from Northern Ireland into Ireland itself, the mainland.

So they're traveling to Northern Ireland, they'd like, I don't know how they're, because Northern Ireland is part of the UK. So if you get to Northern Ireland, you would treat the same as if you was in England, or Scotland, or Wales, I guess. I'm not sure how it all works.

I don't know. But that's weird, though. But if people actually get on, if they get on boats, and they're going to Ireland, then that's not, that's not really for them to say, no, you're going to England, is it really? Because they've chosen to go to Ireland.

I don't know, maybe. Yeah, I don't know. I have to figure that one out.

I was surprised about Ireland because I lived in Ireland for a little while, my family's Irish. And my experience of Ireland was nice people. But they don't take no rubbish from people, you know, they've got their own minds, and they don't like being told what to do, especially by authority.

And just like the, you know, the, who does really, to be honest, but I just got the impression quite stubborn, and had traditions and tradition was important. And as things that happened, some of the new laws that have gone through the European Union, and that have like reached Ireland, for example, no smoking in pubs, or restaurants, public places like that. But no smoking in pubs.

It became law in Ireland before it became law in the UK. I think. In fact, I might be wrong.

But either way, Ireland didn't bother, didn't worry. When the pubs in Ireland are way more, it's way more still part of the culture than the pubs in England. Because I mean, maybe it's changed a lot.

But when I was there, it was every single pub in the town was busy. Every single night. Not that they're drinking loads, it's just it's a social being so, you know, socialising.

Here we get loads of pubs closed down. And perhaps that was busy at the weekend and that but how many pubs left in the UK left in in England? I wonder how many pubs left in England 40,000 pubs. There are fewer pubs in England and Wales than ever before.

And total of pubs dropped below 40,000. During the first half of 2022, a fall of more than 7000 since a decade ago. Blimey, that's that's nearly a I don't know 714 28.

I don't know. It's a percentage, isn't it? Definitely a percentage. There was 39,970 pubs in June, down by more than 7000.

Okay. This is the standard.co.uk. I wasn't really asking about England. Well, it's just England.

Just want to see how many pubs are in England. England, how many How many pubs have closed since 2023? Really? Two pubs per day vanishing. So every day, two pubs a day closed down in England and Wales.

It's not the same two pubs, obviously. But that's Wow. Maybe it's just society is changing.

It's I mean, maybe I don't know. I mean, I really believed I was wrong, but I really believe that most of the pubs would close down once they did not stop smoking. When they put the smoking ban in, in the early 2000s.

I thought that would be the end of pubs. Because you take away people's freedom like that. And it just I don't know, I just didn't expect people that were drinking to abide by the rules.

But hey, it seems to have people you know, seem to have got through. I know what I mean, not to stop smoking. No, I'm trying to think when did it come in in the UK? Stop smoking, stop smoking ban, smoking ban in the UK.

Is it 2004? UK. Smoking ban in the UK. 2000.

When will the UK smoking ban come into force? 2024. That's a different smoking ban. And again, that's copied from Canada, I think.

Where anyone over the age anyone under the age of 18 on a certain date this year. Or is it 21? I don't know what every age is. I think 18 will never be able to buy cigarettes the whole of their life.

So if they turn 18 next year, they won't be able to buy cigarettes. So instead of being by age, it's by your date of birth, what year you were born. So no one that was born, if it is still 18, you know, the age of buying cigarettes, I don't know.

If it's still 18, then whoever was born 18 years ago, so whatever that is. 2024, 2004, 2006. So anyone born after 2006 will never legally be allowed to buy tobacco products in this country.

Anyone born from 2007 onwards, which is, I mean, there are literally people in their 40s having to ask their friend who's a year older to go to the, go to the, there'll be middle-aged men and women standing outside newsagents. So, do us a favour mate, could you just get in here and buy me a pack of 20? Yeah, yeah, no, I'm not old enough. I'm only 49.

Yeah, just 20. Of course I'll give you the money. So here's 5,000 pounds.

Just 20, please. Should be enough. Probably how much there'll be by then.

By then, I'm 53. I'm over 49, am I? Oh my goodness. I'm thinking of 18-year-olds being 49 or someone that's 17 being, uh, there's some illogical there somewhere.

I don't know where. So yeah, that's, that's why I try and keep away from the news. Where was the UK? Okay, let's have a look.

2004. End of 2008? Ah, okay. On the 16th of November, 2004, a public health white paper proposed a smoking ban in almost all places, public places in England and Wales.

Smoking restrictions would be phased in with a ban on smoking in NHS and government buildings by 2006, in enclosed public places by 2007, and pubs, bars and restaurants except pubs not serving food by the end of 2008. Okay, I thought it was earlier than that. It shows what I know.

Okay, so when was smoking banned in Ireland? March 2004. So I kind of got it right, kind of, kind of. I did think it was, it was sooner, it was before us.

And yeah, blimey. I could definitely do with, I need to get some food. That's what I need to do, get some food, man.

If I had any phone calls and nowt, nowt, nowt, nowt, nowt. Good. New consent, new consent requirement from Google Ads.

What? Go away. Oh, that's just some strange, sometimes I get some weird things sent to me. Oh.

So I'm going to go. So that's it for now. So thank you for listening.

Remember to be kind to yourself because, because, because of the things she does. Because of the wonderful, I don't know. We're off to see the wizard.

That, that's what kind of the song I was trying to sing. So remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve to be happy. Be gentle with yourself.

Okay, be gentle. Lots of love.