#996 Toilet humour Let me bore you to sleep (Jason Newland) (21st April 2023)

Hello, hello and welcome, welcome to let me bore you, let me bore you to sleep. My name's Jason Newland and oh my website, oh my beautiful website. You need to check it out, you don't need to check it out, but please check it out.

There's no benefit to me you checking it out, I get paid a million pound every time you visit. It's jasonnewland.com, it's basically a podcast now, so yeah just have a look, it might be useful, it might not be, so that's a good promotion isn't it? It might be a bit rubbish, have a look anyway, you wouldn't believe I used to be a sales person would you? Blimey, imagine if I still had that sales drive that I used to have 20 years ago, doing well 20, blimey, 22 years ago, I would be, I don't know, I'd be quite, I suppose I'd still be doing sales wouldn't I?

To be fair, please only listen when you can safely close your eyes, safely, very salivary that wasn't a safe-y close your eyes, so yeah, it's Friday the, not 13th, I don't know what day it is, what's the date today, 21st I do believe of April, 2023, and I'm just laying back in my sofa, in my sofa, on my sofa, not actually inside the sofa, that would be weird, they don't make sofas big enough for me to be inside them, and now I've said the word twice, that sounds even weirder, so I'll stop, I've never seen

a sofa I wanted to be inside, it sounds wrong doesn't it, what I meant was actually inside like, yeah I'll stop, so it's quite a bright day outside, it was raining earlier, I took the little monkey out for a walk, what time was it, 6 o'clock this morning, and for some reason, I know why now, but he did a wee, and usually I walk up to the nearest bit of grass, that isn't someone's lawn, he does a wee wee, and then he decides he wants to get, he wants to go home, I'm getting hot in

there, he decides he wants to go home, well today he did a wee, but he didn't want to go home, the thing is it was raining, and it was, I'll take this off, I'm getting a bit hurt, it wasn't warm, I mean it's rarely warm at 6 in the morning anyway, but it was a bit chilly, not like a proper proper cold, but it was you know, it was a bit hmm, and he doesn't normally like the rain, he's not a big fan of the rain, he will go out and it sometimes, if he's desperate

to get outside, I couldn't figure it out, what are you doing, right, because normally you know, do a wee and then he will walk home, like come on dad back, and that suits me, you know, to get back straight in bed, or not back in bed, but get back to make me breakfast or whatever, but this morning he was dithering, he was sniffing the grass and I was getting wet, you know, I was getting wetter and wetter, with every passing second I was getting wetter, pretty sure I just heard a duck in the garden, which

is weird, that is very weird, I heard a crow earlier, when I was making my relax and sleep hypnosis daily recording, I did that just a little while ago, and there was a crow, I think it's a crow, I mean that was me, but I'm saying that the sound sounded like a crow, I'm no expert on crows, I'm no expert on bird sounds, I'm not an expert on anything, I think the only birds that I really can tell you the sounds of, I can't do the sounds necessarily, but when I hear them I know, that's

pigeons and seagulls, but one of the reasons, well probably the only reason for that is, they're kind of the most prominent birds, especially if you live near the sea, which I don't but I have, I don't now but I have in the past, and there's always seagulls and they come inland, don't see them so much around here, but I used to see them, but also they like rubbish dumps as well, seagulls, that's more fun than the sea, they should be called rubbish dump gulls, oh I'm really pleasing myself with that one, oh make me self

laugh, rubbish dump gulls, oh dear, but I don't know the sounds, crows is another one that I think I know the sounds of, I'm pretty sure it's like, I'm a crow, but other birds like blue tits and robin red breast, I don't really, they don't really make sounds, I mean I'm sure they do make sounds, but what are the birds that make a lot of sounds, is it wrens, because I hear sounds all day long, not just in my head, I'm talking about the birds in the tree, I've got a huge tree outside my window,

it is a, it's not a beanstalk, it is a tree, and it's big, it clearly, well to me it looks like it's probably been here longer than the building, but in reality it probably hasn't, because they generally don't build houses around trees do they, they normally, you know, they, whoever they are, I mean whoever built this estate, probably aren't even alive anymore, because it's been here for a long time, unless they did it when they were very very young, so actually no that's not true, they could be in their 80s or 90s, yeah I don't

know, I'm just, I'm kind of thinking if it was my age, building this place, I'm only 30, 30, and otherwise, so yeah, that tree must have just been a tiny little tree, that they put up when they built this area, and I'm guessing at the time there was, because I think this was built for elderly people, it was kind of like a residential area really, back in the 70s or the 50s, I don't know, 60s, 70s, and as far as I'm aware, that's what it was, this whole area, just this little bit of area that

we have, was, I mean it's this grass, and I imagine it was just all communal, and people could come out and, you know, hang out together, and then over the years, I've been told that what the council did is they thought, we'll start letting some people move in that are not elderly, that maybe have problems, younger people that have maybe social problems, and being around the elderly people might be beneficial to them, it might help them, you know, emotionally, socially, whatever, well it didn't work, and it ended up being just an area for people with

social problems, apart from those that buy the flats, those that buy, then maybe sell on, and it could be anyone living there, but those that rent, generally are, it's a social kind of, with social housing, this is very, they're really guided people to live here that have certain issues, so it's kind of interesting how it's worked out, maybe it will go back to being an elderly place again, if I stay here for much longer, it might do, I don't know, strange isn't it, I don't know, that's weird, someone's banging the gate, who are you banging

the gate for, stop banging the gate, so yeah, I took him, oh yeah, so I've got Vinnie outside, he's on the grass, and it's just like, what are you doing, walking around, it's raining, I'm getting wet, why are you just loitering on the grass, there's no one else around, no other dogs, no other humans, just me and him, and then I knew what he was doing, because he started to walk sideways, and that's when he's about to do a poo, usually, and he needs to get nasally stimulated in order to do a poo, it's like

he has to smell something that opens up his bum, every time, unless he's desperate to go and he just squirts one out, but generally it's like he has to smell something, and that it's like, well not an aphrodisiac, but I suppose laxative maybe, I don't know, natural laxative, maybe that's what I need to do when I get constipated next, go into the park and start sniffing the grass, that would be weird, it might be worth it, I tell you, it's like yeah, but you'll get arrested, I tell you, I'd rather get arrested, go through the

pain of constipation, blimey, oh, so those that do ever get constipated, I'll just let you know, I was told, I found out a couple of things that you should do to prevent it, one of the things is make sure you drink plenty of water, because that can be a cause, because your body needs lots of water to produce the poo, why am I talking about this, anyway, and also the other thing is, when you need to go, go, because sometimes we need to go and we don't go, do we, like well wait till later, I'm

busy doing this, I'll treat myself after dinner, after the film, you know, it's like no, go when you need to go, even if it's a false alarm, just go, and the other thing is don't force it, of course, don't force a fart wearing white trousers, you know, it's just a standard thing, isn't it, I also think that farts is, if you waste your farts, it can cause a bit of problems, you need to leave some of the farts in and go to the toilet, because that's a little bit like a rocket taking off, I think

it's the propeller, it's all the combustion that sends the rocket into space, and although the rocket drops those boosters off and the rocket continues to go into space, that's a little bit like the fart, is the rocket itself ends up with the toilet and the farts, it just sucks, why am I talking about, I'm trying, it might sound, I've got a toilet humour, no, I'm just, I'm trying to be useful, I want to, I want to be able to spread useful information, that's what it is, you just don't understand me, so yeah, it turned out

Vinnie needed to go to the toilet, and he did, and I thanked him, and we went home, after me picking it up, putting it into the bin, and then yet again, walking home, thinking to myself, I wish I'd bought a poo bag with me, so yeah, he's, he was good, although yesterday, he's a little thief, I might have mentioned this in yesterday's recording, I was visiting a friend, what downstairs, and I took my coat off, and Vinnie let himself, well he's behind me, I didn't even know, he's inside my pocket, and he ate all of

the treats pretty much, now there was at least six, seven strips of these meat trips, treats, which I break into bits, so I give him a little treat every time, you know, when he crosses the road properly, and things like that, he just ate the whole thing, which means I'm short of treats, not short, but I ain't got a huge many, huge amount left, and the weird thing is, I thought I had a bag of treats, and I don't know where they are, they just seem to have disappeared, now you might say, well Vinnie's probably

had them, but they were in the cupboard, unless he's turned into a cat burglar, I mean technically, that would be why he would want a burglar, would be a cat, he definitely wouldn't go near treats, if there was a cat on offer, he's obsessed with cats, and I said to him, this is a cliche mate, this is a cliche, you're a living cliche, he said, I know you are, but what am I, it's like, oh I can't have a conversation with someone that says stuff like that, he said, I know you are, but what am

I, you can't keep using the same thing, if you keep saying the same thing, it becomes redundant, and you just sound stupid, I know you are, so what am I, it's very childish, it's very childish, I wish he was more serious like me, I wish he was more, I don't know, just more, more pious, pious, that's one word I'm never going to be described as, pious, so yeah, it's, one weird thing happened last night, and I'll be honest, I don't know what it was, but, oh I know what it was, but I don't know why,

I go to bed about half nine, ten o'clock in the evening, strange thing to do, but hey, that's what I do, and then I get up, whenever I wake up, or when he wakes me up, now I say to him, right, time for bed, I go into the bathroom, clean my teeth, do everything that I need to do, you know, thank the toilet for everything it does for me, just, you know, just general things, and then I go into the, I take my skin off obviously, because I'm a reptile, and then I go into the

bedroom, and the quilt is fully on the bed, so it's not all rumpled up, rumpled up, crumpled up, however, it often is, and he was laying right at the top of the bed, near the wall, like, kind of, not a head level, because that's where I go on the pillows, but he's pretty much like, you know, top of the chest, neck area, he was, he was laying down, and I thought, oh, as soon as I lay down, he's going to move to my feet, which he normally does, that's where he normally starts, and then I

wake up, and he's right at my chest, the amount of times I wake up, and he's at my chest, but this time, he doesn't like to do it when I'm awake, he likes to be, I don't know, loving, but he doesn't like to do it when I'm awake, he likes to show affection, but not when I'm able to see it, which is strange, well, he didn't move, I laid down, on my left side, normally I lay down on my right side, and sometimes he will lay at my back, you know, the middle of my back,

or the top of my back, and lean against it, but this time, I just, I laid on my right, and I thought, oh, I'll put my hand on him, and I'll just, like, stroke him, and just, not cuddle him tight or anything, but just, I'll put my hand on his belly, or on his back, and in the past, I've done that, and he's like, get off me, leave me alone, stop touching me, and running off to the bottom of the bed, and I hear, he's like, touch me, touch my back, it's just like, I don't

know why he's like that, you know, sometimes he phones his friend downstairs, he did it again, he did it again, he stroked my back, I was trying to sleep, that's just so, so disruptive, it disturbs me, made me jump, I just don't know why he does it, can't leave me alone, he's so needy, so needy, do you want to swap owners?

I'll have your owner, you have this one, he's doing me, he's doing me nothing, he is, he's doing me, he's really winding me up, and apart from anything else, you see what he does, when he, he talks to himself, he's got this big metal thing, and he talks into it, but he's talking to himself, he's not talking to me, I'm sitting there looking at him, and he doesn't say nothing to me, he's like, talking to me, and then when I talk back to him, he puts me into the bedroom, he's put me on, puts me

on a naughty step, I've had enough, so yeah, I don't know where he got the phone from, but he, he didn't move though, last night, he just stayed there, at one point he moved, he laid down on his back, so his belly was out, so I could like rest my hand on his belly, which he likes, or his chest, he likes having his chest stroked, and I thought, okay, I'll just stay here for a little while, and this was at ten o'clock last night, maybe quarter to ten, at about ten to six this morning, he

was still there, and I was like, what, how can you still be there after all them hours, he just stayed right next to me the whole time, the whole time man, yeah, and he's never done that before, and it might sound strange when I say that he, he doesn't like to show affection when I'm awake, I mean literally, if I'm reclined on this chair, in the living room, and I, and he jumps up, and he, he lends his, in his chin on my ankles, but if I go to pick him up, to pull him closer,

he'll run off, you're not my real dad, go away, leave me alone, it's like, wow, okay, but if I pretend to be asleep, or if I am asleep, I mean, I don't see it when I'm asleep, but if I'm pretending to be asleep, oh, you know when you can look through your eyes, I don't mean generally, yeah, that's called seeing, I don't mean that, I mean when you can look through your eyelashes, but the person can't see that your eyes are open, necessarily, I was doing that, and I could see him looking at me, and

really slowly walking towards me, really hesitantly, and it'd take a couple of steps forward, then he'd step back, and then he'd climb, and then he'd climb onto my legs, and he was so, it took a good five to ten minutes, and then he laid down on my chest, and he won't do that if I'm awake, he's something, I don't know, he's like, he's very hesitant about showing affection, and it's not like I'm going to push him away, or reject him, because I wouldn't, you know, I like a, I like a nice little cuddle sometimes, and

if he wants to give me a cuddle, I'll give him a cuddle, another thing he does sometimes, he will walk to the side of me, and he'll only really do it if we've been playing, so if we've been fighting, if he likes to bite my fingers, and we, you know, play fighting, and then he will sit down right next to me, and cuddle up, kind of to the side of me, but it's rare, he doesn't do that that often, so it's kind of strange, I don't really know, I can't figure him out, I mean, I

know it's not really, it's not really my job to figure out a dog, I mean, who knows what anyone's thinking, I've never figured out a human either, I don't think I've ever wanted to, I don't know, maybe just a little bit, but not just, yeah, completely alien to me, humans, I can't even figure out myself, so there you go, I got woken up at, I didn't get woken up, but I had someone knocking at my door at 10 to 8 this morning, I was like, I was literally about to go back to sleep, because I'd

been up for a couple of hours, and I was going to have a little lay down with my boy, just have a little lay down, I'd done some work, I'd done a bit of internet stuff, and I thought, yeah, I'll have a lay down, knock at the door, now the knock itself wasn't loud, well, it might have been loud, I can't remember, but I didn't, I could have ignored it, I didn't ignore it, because it's very, very difficult to ignore something when you have a little dog screeching in your ear, which is what he does,

there's someone at the door, he goes barmy on me, like really high pitched, and depending on who it is, if it's someone he knows, someone that he gets so excited, and he gets excited even if he doesn't know who they are, but if he knows who they are, because he can smell them, he knows who's who, I guess, especially if it's his boyfriend from downstairs, because they love each other, they would, I'm pretty sure they'd get married, them two, them two dogs, they would be together the whole time, I'm pretty sure that Vinnie would be

happy to not even be with me, if he could just be with his friend downstairs, he'd be happy, that'd be it, he couldn't be happier, I really do believe that, and it's a shame, but he's a dog's dog, he really, really loves dogs, he's a pack animal, he's not interested, he loves humans as well, but he loves dogs, he's got a real thing for dogs, and I don't know if that's because of his breed, his pedigree, whatever you want to call it, oh yeah, so I had a, I had someone knock on my door at

ten to eight, and I put the chain on, and answered, because I don't mean my, I don't have like a big chain that I wear, I'm talking about the door, and the chain on the door, and it's not for security, it's more to stop Vinnie from getting out, because it just keeps the door closed enough that he can't fit out, because otherwise he just runs out, and he doesn't listen to me, he'll run outside, if the front door's open outside, if someone's wedged it open, he'll just run out, and he'll, if there's a cat the

other side of the road, you know, he'll go, he'll run towards the cat, he's got no sense, a lot, a lot of dogs don't have any sense of the road, it's not his fault, I'm trying to train him to be careful, but ultimately, even when he's on the lead with me, which is most of the time, he will still try and run in the road, sometimes, you know, it might just be because the bit of chewing gum that he wants to eat, I mean, it amazes me, the other day he said, oh can it, I

said, how come you're not drinking your water, he said, well how come you haven't changed it, put some fresh water in, so you want some fresh water, he said, well yeah, there was a clue in me saying, how come you haven't put any fresh water in the bowl, I said, well you haven't got to have an attitude about it, I mean, you're not a teenager yet, why are you being like this, he said, what you got, what you got against teenagers, I said, I've got nothing against teenagers, I'm just saying that you're still, you're only

a year old, why are you, why are you giving it the biggin, why are you giving it an attitude, he said, you love using that term the biggin, don't you, why do you love it so much, I said, I don't love it, he said, you haven't used it since 1995 and suddenly you're using it regularly, why, I don't know why, I haven't really thought about it, but you have, have you noticed that, I said, yeah, I kind of have noticed it to be honest, I don't know why I'm using it, it's, but you never used

to use it, not for a long time, not for a good, what, blimey, 25 years, 95, 2005, 2015, 2023, that's like 28 years, you haven't used that term and now you're using it, that phrase, giving it the biggin, yeah, well, I don't know, maybe I'm trying to bring it back into fashion, it never was in fashion, nothing you've ever done has been in fashion, now Vinnie, you're a year old, you don't know what I've done, everybody knows what you've done, you don't stop talking about it, do you, okay, fair enough, shush now, I'm trying to

do a podcast, you're trying to do a podcast, what about my podcast, I don't know, I don't know what to say to that, I'll tell you what to say to it is, I think we need to start having different voices when we do these things, because it's the same voice for both, people are supposed to follow who's who, I don't know, who are you, exactly, I don't know which one I am, am I Vinnie or am I you, and there's supposed to be a conversation between the two of us, but if we both have the

same voice, it gets a little bit confusing, yeah, I suppose so, what do you mean you suppose so, I stop being so agitated, okay, now I want to say okay dad, but I'm not sure, because I might be you, you know what I mean, am I Vinnie or am I you, I don't, I don't know now, I've lost track, should we just stop, should we just stop the the conversation, yeah, I suppose, but before you go, what are you doing later, well, I do the podcast, I've 36 minutes in, so I do it for about

an hour, and then I'll, I'm not going to edit it straight away, because I've done two recordings, I'll just leave them, and I'll edit them later on, I'll probably maybe have a cup of tea, and just relax for a bit, I'm thinking about watching the end of the a movie I was watching earlier, but for some reason the internet wasn't working on the the app, what do you think that is, I'll be honest, I don't know, because I'm using the other internet, the broadband, I'm using because I've got two, why are you telling me you,

I know you got two, I know, but for whoever's listening, oh I forgot about that, yeah, podcast, yeah, so I'm using one, so I'm uploading a video to YouTube, a 10 hour video, which is a kind of an experiment really, to see whether it's possible to do it practically, because it's, it takes hours to upload, and it's not 4k, it's not 4k, it's 1080 or 1070 h, I think it's high definition, but it's not 4k, and it's kind of for, you know what's weird, right, the 4k, I had, it was three, 300 gigabytes, or was

it 200 gigabyte, it was huge, a huge file, admittedly 10 hours long, it's going to be a big file, if it's a video, but this was huge, absolutely huge, now I had to delete that, because that was taking up all the room on my computer, I think I've got one terabyte on my computer, now I downloaded, or I made, I edited the video on Adobe Pro, whatever it's called, so I did that yesterday, last night, it took all night to process, but all night, I think, pretty much, or it took hours, it took about a

good 10 hours, if not longer, to process, to render, and that's too long, so what I did is, and it was too big to upload, and I was getting about 1% uploaded to YouTube every 45 minutes, I mean that's just ridiculous, it's just not, it's not practical, so I abandoned that, I deleted that, and then I exported a version that was lower down, it was a 1070 something like that, instead of being 4k, and I downloaded that, exported that, it still took a couple of hours to export, to render, two or three hours, but the

quality was the same, I watched both of them back to back, before I deleted the big one, and it didn't look any different to me, really didn't look any different, and I just thought, well what's the point, what's the point in, I mean, if I upload that to YouTube, they're only going to, they're going to resize it anyway, there's no way a 300 gigabyte file is going to stay at 300 gigabytes, because I'd have to, I'd have to pay YouTube, you know, imagine if I'm uploading hundreds of videos, it's just, yeah, it's, it's a no,

so what I've done is, I extracted a smaller file, and I think it was still, it's still a large file, still, I don't know if it was 30 gigabytes, something like that, 30, 40 gigabytes, it was still a big file, but a heck of a lot smaller than the other one, and it took a few hours just to render, to to be processed, and then it was available for me, so it downloaded onto my desktop of my computer, and I uploaded it to YouTube, so it's still in the process of uploading, and from the looks

of it, it's, I don't know if it's done yet, it might be uploaded now, no, it's still uploading, I can't see from here quite what percentage is uploaded, it's too far away, but the, it's, no, I can't, I'll just be making it up before I actually said I know what it is, because I don't, so it's taken a few hours to upload, and then it'll take a few hours to process, but the processing takes, that takes place online, so it's nothing to do with my broadband, it's to do with YouTube, and I imagine, I imagine

a 10 hour video will take some while to process.

Now this is an experiment, because if it works, and it turns out playing OK on YouTube once it's processed, then what I'm going to be doing, and I'm not going to release them yet, I'm going to make all the recordings that I've already got on YouTube, plus all the newer recordings, and the older recordings, and I'm going to make a 10 hour version.

So the versions that are on YouTube at the moment are just the standard versions with background music, and the videos have graphics and moving things like, you know, just a background of forests, or the sea, or beach, like, you know, a video, not a still picture, but video, a moving sea, or a waterfall, or a lake, things like that, and I've done the same for the 10 hour versions. So I'm going to do a 10 hour version of each of the recordings, as well as the, it'll also have a normal version, the length of the recording, the original recording, with background music. But I won't start releasing the 10 hour ones until I've got a few uploaded.

So at the moment, I'm still up until the 22nd of May, plus I've got another, yeah, so I've got the 22nd of May, all scheduled for a new recording to be released every day, a new video, and I've also got another 10 to schedule as well. So that'll take me to the end of May. So I'll make some more of them, still got quite a few more to make, but the ones I'm doing at the moment, I'm having to re-edit the audio to get rid of some of the background hissing, because they're quite, some of them are not old recordings, but before I got the better equipment.

So I'll be doing that, and it's going to be weird, because eventually I'll have, I guess I will have a lot of recordings on YouTube, but they will all be video, they won't just be, you know, a picture with a podcast episode at the back. It'll be an actual proper recording, proper video. So it'd be interesting to see how it, how it goes, how it grows, and I think I've got about 943 subscribers at the moment, and it is a slow burner, you know, it's not, I think with what I do, I don't necessarily get loads of new subscribers of people that don't listen.

People subscribe and they do listen. I think it's people tend to like what I'm doing, and they, they subscribe because they do actually want to know when the next recording is, and stuff like that, I suppose. I don't know, but I am interested, because YouTube used to be my, that was my playground, that was my place, that was where I, it's not so much where I started, but it is where I put my most effort into.

I mean, I always had podcasts going as well, but YouTube was the place where I had most of my followers, or listeners, watchers, people watching me. So that, that's kind of, it feels, it feels kind of nice to be back, in a way, and I do get people leave messages, it's much more interactive than podcasts, in that sense, because on YouTube, people leave messages on the pod, on the episode with podcasts. I suppose you can, but generally, it's not so much done, is it?

It's, it's, it's less, it's quite weird, it's, you know, podcasts are more personal, yet less interactive, it seems, but more personal in a way that, I think you can get, it's also with YouTube as well, especially with vlogs, and if you follow someone, there's people I've followed for years, and I kind of, I kind of feel that I know them, I feel that I get a general sense of who they are as a person, and, I mean, I'm thinking maybe I should do a weekly vlog, instead of like a daily vlog, because I'm doing the

videos and everything, maybe do a weekly vlog, where I just make, film myself during the week, it's not gonna be very exciting, but just, you know, just generally what's on my mind, and edit it down, so it's not terrible, and, and have footage of me with Vinnie, and him in the, in the fields running around, stuff like that, and then just put together a vlog once a week, and release it one, you know, on a weekend, or something like that, and just, or a Wednesday, I don't know why Wednesday, but we'll see, we'll see, so

I don't, I mean, I thought about having different YouTube channels for the different podcasts, so, you know, having a different one for the Let Me Bore You To Sleep, a different one for the Deep Sleep Whisper, different one for the Pain Relief, a different one, and maybe have a vlog, Jason Chatts vlog, different one for that, but then I think that gets a little bit messy in some ways, I understand the advantage of it as well, because some people might only like to listen to the Deep Sleep Whisper hypnosis recordings, and videos, they might not

want to listen to anything else, or watch anything else, or somebody might only be interested in the Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast, but there's something about having everything in one place, I quite like that, I'm not even sure why, I just do, I quite like the idea of just everything being here, you know, in one place, so having all the videos, just, and mind you, the podcasts are all separate, aren't they, kind of, not all, I mean, some, I do have some podcasts that have all my stuff on, and my website, jasonnewland.com, is,

that's got all my stuff on, I'm not sure, I don't know, I just sometimes think that things could get lost, if there's too many, so maybe I do need to look at having different YouTube channels, I'm talking my, I'm talking myself into it now, aren't I, yeah, I don't know, because things will get lost, but does it matter, does it matter, I mean, I've got, I don't know how many I've got, 250 videos, or something like that, on my YouTube channel, by the end of the year, I'll have well over a thousand videos

on there, and that probably won't even include the newest recordings, I'm so going to be so behind on that, you know, I'll be focusing on the older stuff, turning those into videos, it might, it might get to the point where I'm having to release two videos a day, just to have them on YouTube, and then if I'm making a couple of new podcasts a day, you know, I'm going to be behind by months on my YouTube channel, but eventually I'll catch up, because once I've done the older stuff, once everything's up and uploaded, then eventually

I'll just be, it'll just be the new stuff, it'll just be the latest recordings that I need to convert and create a video from, yeah, so it'll be all right, it'll be okay in the end, it'll be all right, yes, so what's happening with you, are you okay, are things going well for you, are they, so that's really all I've been doing, that's been making videos, it's time consuming, the whole thing, you know, making recordings, I mean the easiest part of making a recording is the actual recording bit, none of it's okay, none of it's

hard really, you know, as far as the editing and the processing and making images and then uploading and then scheduling and all that stuff, but it is, it is time consuming and sometimes I leave it to the last minute, which is not a good idea, because any time in the next, really in the last two hours of the day, I don't want to do anything, I'll be honest, I'll be sitting there at the computer trying to work on the podcasts, to make them available throughout the night, you know, scheduling to be released at two o'clock

in the morning and stuff like that, and I just don't want to do it, it's like my heart, my eyes and my mind is just turned off, I just want to go and lie down and go to bed, because it's the end of the day, I don't can't be bothered, so what I'll try and do today is I'll try and um, yeah I'll try and do the editing in the next couple of hours and then upload them and then do the images and try and get it done by, I don't know, six o'clock, because what

is it now, it's twenty to, twenty to two in the afternoon, so if I can get everything done by six, it then gives me a bit more, yeah it just, it's done, I don't have to think about it, which is a good thing, so what I'm thinking about now is, should I do a deep sleep whisper recording, but I'm thinking what I might do is interchange, or what I'm thinking is the answer is no, because I've just done an hour and a half of talking, so this one and the other one I did, and that's,

that's enough, it's enough talking for now, enough talking for now, oh yes, I don't need no more talking, no, no, no, no, no talking, my name is Kermit, my name is Kermit, why did they make him green, see frogs aren't green, are frogs green, or maybe they are, I thought frogs were blue, I mean I'm not an expert on frogs, I don't expect you to be an expert on frogs, I don't know why I'm mentioning frogs, very long legs, and frog's legs aren't that thin, they're quite strong, aren't they frog's legs, to be able to,

for them to hop over buildings and things, they need to have very strong legs, and I don't know, Kermit just, his legs are out of proportion with his body, I don't mean to body shame, really I don't, but they don't look like they could support his body, I don't know, I mean I'm feeling guilty now, I mean, what have I got against Kermit, nothing, I love Kermit, just, we all love Kermit, don't we, those that love him, but, oh Kermit, Kermit, I love my Kermit, oh, that's my impression of Bert, what's her name, Miss Piggy,

do you remember Pigs in Space, the Muppet Show, Pigs in Space, oh they were the good old days, I don't think I realised that Sesame Street was the same kind of producer, you know, same place that the Muppets came from, I still think it's one of the best tunes ever, da da da da da da, coming down to Sesame Street, Big Bird, remember Big Bird, the Cookie Monster, was the Cookie Monster in the Muppets as well, or was it just in Sesame Street, the Fraggle Rock, that was also Jim Henson wasn't it, the Trash Ape

has spoken, Fraggle Rock, The Dark Crystal, that movie, I wonder if Jim Henson was involved in E.

T.

, I really don't know, I think he might have been involved in some of the really awful horror movies, you know, where a werewolf actually looks like a puppet, like a Muppet, yeah, I'm trying to think what other shows, it's weird because the Muppet Show is in its heyday, well I'm going to say early 80s, I mean its heyday might have been before that, but in the UK of England, the Muppet Show is probably at its peak in the early 80s, and they had all the big stars on there, like huge stars would go on

to the Muppet Show, and I remember like just, and they weren't all comedy stars, they did have the comedy stars on there, but they really attracted, it's almost like the Muppet Show was the biggest TV show in the world, maybe it was, I don't know, I imagine it reached, well it was in America, and it reached England, and maybe other parts of the UK, so therefore maybe it reached Europe, and China, and Russia, and where else is there, Australia, New Zealand, Canada, Mexico, that's it isn't it, yeah, that's all the planets there are, so if

it reached the entire solar system, then I guess it would make it the biggest, biggest in the world, biggest TV show ever, so they could afford to pay the biggest stars to be a part of that program, yeah, it's groovy really when you think about it, what was I talking about, I don't know, anyway I'm going now, I'm going, thank you for listening, remember, remember, remember, remember, remember to be kind to yourself, because you deserve to be happy, be gentle with yourself, do something nice for yourself today, lots of love, bye it's springtime