#987 Vinny punched me - Let me bore you to sleep (Jason Newland) (20th March 2023)

Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name is Jason Newland, Newland, and please only listen when you can safely close your eyes, and oh I've got itchy eyeball, oh that's better, and yeah so my website is jasonnewland.com. So today is Monday the 20th of March, 2003, it's 18. 44 in the afternoon or evening, quarter to seven p. m.

and yeah it's been a it's been an okay day, I've managed to do quite a bit on the YouTube side of things, so I've made a few videos there, I managed to upload a 10 hour video for one of my Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcasts, so I converted that into a 10 hour video, so that took absolutely ages, hours and hours and hours to upload to YouTube, it was I think 85 gigabytes, quite a big old file, and it's there, it's uploaded and it's playing fine, so that's good. What else did I do?

Oh I made a Deep Sleep Whisper hypnosis episode today, and that's not being released until 10 o'clock, so 10 the one without music will be 10 o'clock, one with music will be midnight, then two o'clock for the five hour version, and four o'clock for the 10 hour version, so that's that, and then this recording will be released at nine, nine, eleven, one and three, that's kind of how it works out.

So on the YouTube channel I've got 901 subscribers, I've got, what did I have yesterday? I think I've got two more than yesterday, or three more. So I should remember as it was in the title of the actual podcast, but I can't remember, it's been 901, so I need 99 to get to the thousand, and I know you're probably thinking thanks for that, we couldn't quite work it out ourselves, here's me looking for my calculator, later, but no, it's yeah, I'd like to get to the thousand, just to have a thousand, I guess it makes sense to me, makes sense.

So yeah, I've done 1200, yeah, so it's, it's going okay, the channel, it's, it's what's interesting, it's not interesting probably to anyone else, but it's only really between one and four in the morning UK time that I get the most traffic on YouTube, and I've got a dry mouth, so I'm going to have some water, I've just had a cup of tea, do you ever find that when you drink tea it dries your mouth out a little bit? Maybe I'm drinking it wrong, perhaps I shouldn't pour it in my ears, so 5.

6 thousand views last day, okay, I did this yesterday, so I won't go through all that, I can hear a sigh of relief, today statistically it's been quite good for my podcast, I've, what is it, 10 to 7 nearly, and I've had over 16,000 downloads, so yesterday I had 17 and a half thousand, so I still got to one o'clock in the morning, so what's that, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, one, there's still six hours, so I'm quite pleased with that, and the one podcast that's really, really taken off, since the end of last month, I mean it's been doing well anyway, I've got 1.

2 million, there's the Deep Sleep Whisperer one, but for some reason since the 28th of February, nearly every day it's, I'm getting like 2,000 plus, like today I've had two and a half thousand, I haven't actually made any new recordings since the 6th of March, so that's 14 days, so pretty much the whole of the month, well not the whole of the month, but you know quite a lot of the month, apart from six days, and it's just strange, and then the one before that was the 3rd of March, and then I didn't do one

all the way from the 9th of February, so it's, I don't know, it's just picked up, really picked up, and I'm not really sure why, I'm not complaining, I mean two and a half thousand already today, and that's without the new one being released, so yeah, it's just, I don't know, it's just quite exciting for me, but then I'm looking at other months, and just yeah, January had over 80,000 in one month, so yeah, I won't keep going about statistics, but I've had nearly 400,000, and I'll continue talking about statistics, I've had nearly 400,000 downloads

in the last 30 days, but in the last seven days, I've had 101,000 and a half, so 101,652 just in seven days, it's not bad is it, really, considering I don't know what I'm doing, I'm making up as I go along, all right, you know, so I took Vinnie out, and took him for a walk, earlier on, he was being very belligerent, I took him to the park, because it's been raining on and off pretty much the whole week, like last week, and it's that time of the year here, we have the, what I used

to call it the April rains, but you know, spring, the beginning of spring is quite rainy in the UK of England, and, you know, it's a very changeable weather here, anyway, but what it means is I can't really take him into the fields, because it's very muddy, and very slippery, and I don't, you know, it's just messy, I don't really want to do that, unless it's dry, once it's dry, it's fine, so I've been taking him into the park, and it's a bit boring for him, he wants to go in the field, he wants to

run, and do all that stuff, and I don't let him off the lead when he's anywhere else, but in the fields, and I make sure he's in the, properly in the fields, long way away from the road, before I let him off the lead, and he loves it, he really loves running around, up and down, and just exploring, so, but he, you know, he's got a new thing now, when he doesn't want to go somewhere, he doesn't just stop walking, he starts sitting down, like a sit-down protest, because he wants to walk a different way,

now, I try to accommodate, what he wants, but sometimes, he's the one on the lead, you know, I don't, I don't want to be bossy, but he just needs to do what I tell him sometimes, like, all the time, like every single thing I ever say, he should comply, because he's got the boss, yeah, I'm not, he's the boss of me, I think, anyway, he's, he's been a little bit annoying, the last couple of days, just a little bit of a handful, playing up a bit, so, I thought, I don't know, I'll take him to

the field, at least we'll have a look, if it's, even if it means, just walking into the field, I'll let him off, and I'll just stand there, let him run around for a little while, I found a way to get him to come back, because I have treats in my pocket, and I only give him the treat, if I hold his collar, so he lets me hold his collar, and then I give him the treat, and he eats it out of my hand, which means, when I come to put the, the lead back on, I've

got him, because if I don't do that, he will run around me, and turn it into a big game, and it's a stare, it is a stare off, until he actually gives in, and comes to me, he will come to me eventually, he'll even like, come to my foot, my feet, and he'll lay down on his back, he'll give up, but it can take 10 minutes of a standoff, and I just don't want that, really, I especially don't want it, if I need him to come to me straight away, for whatever reason, if there's another

dog, if, you know, if he's near a road, you know, wherever, if I want him to come back, I need him to come straight back, so I'm trying to train him to do that, and the best way is to give him a treat, that's kind of obvious, really, isn't it, I suppose, anyway, so we're taking him to park, and it's wet, but it's not that bad, it's muddy, but it's not that muddy, it was muddy, but it wasn't, it was walkable, there was parts that you could walk on, so yeah, I thought, okay, let's do

it, I let him off the lead, and he just, he was so happy, he was running, I don't think I've ever seen him run so fast, yeah, he was really seemed to be enjoying himself, and every now and then, I'd call him back, and I'd give him a treat, I'd hold the collar, and then I'd give him the treat, and then let him go, yeah, not let him go, but like then, go on, good boy, and go off, I don't do it too often, because it becomes meaningless, doesn't it, if you just continue to do

it all the time, so I want him to not so much expect to keep getting treats for no reason, but as a reward, as a reward for following my instructions, which is to come back, so I'm preparing him for a time when I need him to come back, you know, straight away, so they just, there's been a couple of times, and where he's, he's not, he's gone up to dogs that perhaps didn't really want him to go up to him, they didn't want him to go up to them, and I called him and he ignored

me, completely ignored me, this was, oh wow, a good few weeks ago, and I think it was only the second time that I'd let him off the lead, I had no treats with me, in the end it was two ladies with two dogs, and one of them gave him treats in order to keep him still, so from that moment on, I didn't let him off the lead at all for a few weeks, and I started to realize that that's what he gets the most pleasure out of, really, I think the most pleasure is, one of

his most pleasurable things is running free, just really running fast and exploring the dykes, because we've got these ditches, is it ditches between fields, they're dykes, aren't they, and so he likes to explore the dykes, in fact, I think he jumped over one, I didn't see him jump, but he suddenly appeared on the other side, I don't know how he got there, because it was full of water, and I looked, but I couldn't see any canoe, so I don't know how he did it, he must have jumped, and at one point, I wanted him to

come back to me, because we got to the end of this pathway through the field, and it was flooded at the end, now he managed to maneuver his way through it, because there was a bit of just mud, and he just walked through the mud, and it wasn't, it was easy for him, but I would have, it was enough room for me, because he's tiny, there wasn't enough room for me, and he ended up being the other side of the dyke, the ditch, and I said, come back, we'll walk back again, and I, you know,

put my hand in my pocket, pulled a tree out, and he walked towards the dyke, and he was going to jump over the dyke, I'm like, no, because I just can't see him being able to make it, it's a quite a big, quite a big jump, I don't think he'd hurt himself, but he might end up in the water, and I don't know, there's part of me thinking that would be funny, but I don't want him to, if he's, I don't want it to be an unpleasant experience for him, I want it to be more

a choice, you know, if he decides to jump into some water at the duck pond, or if he's with his cousin, and they both jump in the water together, or maybe we're at a beach or something, and he wants to do that, then that's a choice, but I don't want him to sort of slip, and then have a, like a phobia or something of it, because I think that's what happened with Andre, he really didn't like the water, so it's, yeah, I'd rather it be on his terms, rather than an accident, and then I thought,

what if he gets caught, because technically he's fine, but he has got that collar on, now if the collar gets caught on some brambles, or some, because there's a lot of weeds, although the ditches aren't deep, they're, they're not shallow, shall we, but you know, it's probably a good, yeah, imagine if he stood at the bottom, my head probably wouldn't even be poking out the top, but it wasn't full of water, it was only the water, maybe come up to my waist or something, I don't know, but even so, I didn't fancy having to climb

in to get him, so I don't really want him to be jumping in, and, and I don't know, it wasn't cold outside today, but I imagine the water was pretty chilly, so, yeah, but actually, with my hands, I know you can't really see what I'm doing, you can imagine, but I kind of said, round, go round, and I did a round with my hands, like pointing to where I wanted him to go round, and he did, he followed my instructions, and he, he, he walked round, and he got a treat, so yeah, so everything was

good, and we walked up and down a few times, we walked up the other side of the dike, and then back, so we were gone for maybe an hour, hour or so, so, I got back on the lead, you know, when I could see the end of the field where we were going to be moving on to the road, once I could see that, I kind of called him over, and I put the lead back on him, and just as we were leaving the field, I felt a prick, and it was in my left foot,

in the palm of my left foot, and it was really ouch, very ouchy, it was like, what, what, what is that, very sharp, why is there a prick in my shoe, what, what was, because that's, that's, I don't understand this, well, I crossed the road with him, and I'm kind of hobbling a little bit, because I really don't know what it is, and I take my shoe off, my shoe is covered in mud, so I can't actually see what's there, because it's mud, it's caked, it's almost like my, my shoe's been on a dirty protest,

it was just, the bottom of my shoe, it's like, oh, it's really messy, but I managed to clear off some of the mud, and I saw, I looked inside the shoe, and there was this prick sticking up through the hole, so the prick had gone into the hole, I guess the prick had caused the hole, however, I've had holes in the bottoms of my shoes for quite a while, because they do let the rain in, and so, we don't let the rain in, but, because I don't, I don't walk around on my feet, but they,

you know, the damp from the ground soaks into the soles of the feet, and then penetrates the, I guess, my socks, which then penetrates my, the palms of my feet, well, in this instance, the prick was penetrating me, now, I've never, I've had that happen before, I've been penetrated by a prick before, but not, I'm thinking in the field, and it was, I'm not sure if it was even in my foot, because I think the, I think it was in my bum, because there was that time that Andre went down the ditch, or the dike,

or whatever, it was a different dike, and he wouldn't come back, so, I had to follow him to get him, and this is when he was, well, he was always little, but this is, I guess, sort of six months into him being with me, and I slipped down the mud, I hurt my shoulder, my arm, my leg, and my bum, and I did have some prick, a couple of pricks penetrate my bum, so it was, so I had to, like, pull things out of my bum, like brambles, or stuff like that, to be honest, I

was worried that it was bits of metal, because there was, like, an old car frame, a really rusty car frame, or I guess it's a car, I mean, it could have been a tractor, it's something, but it's rusty, and it's metal, and I cut my hand, I cut my arm open on it, not badly, but, you know, enough to, enough to tell everyone about it for about a week, and what was weird about this time, having the prick penetrating my foot, is it felt really hard, the prick felt really hard, and not like, like, you

know, with brambles, let's say you've got the roses, and the pricks on the roses, and yeah, they're sharp, but they can break quite easily, you know, if you, if you kind of move sideways, I said, I don't move sideways, not like you're in a fight with them, you know, swerve sideways, but jousting, you know, jousting pricks, or with the rose, or whatever, I don't know, but this, this prick, that was penetrating my shoe, the bottom of my shoes, it really, it just felt different, it didn't feel like any other prick that I felt before, it

just felt harder, and more, more, I'm not saying that all other pricks felt warm, but this felt quite cold, just, but I guess it's been on the floor, and whatever it was, at the time, I didn't know what it was, all I knew is that, no, it's horrible, and if I felt a bit violated, it's like, I don't know what this thing is, and it's, it's sticking in me, you know, I mean, it, blimey, I mean, it could be anything, well, I took my shoe off, I cleared away some of the mud, so I ended

up with mud all over my hands, and maybe I didn't need to, because, well, that was because I was doing handstands in the, in the puddles, but after that, I took my shoe off, and I could see this prick looking at me, it wasn't looking at me, but, you know, staring at me, like, it was quite prominent, it wasn't a large prick, but it was, definitely, it's, well, I touched the end of it, it's very hard, so, and I rubbed the end of the prick, the hard prick, and I was a little bit worried that

it was gonna, gonna make me bleed, so, what I did, I pushed on it, I pushed on the end of it, to try and push it out of, the bottom, because I couldn't get a grip of it, from the base, or, you know, from, I don't know, the sole, you know, the outside bit of the shoe, I couldn't quite get my fingers around it, so I was trying to push it out from the top, so I was pushing the end of it, trying to push it down, and it wouldn't move, it was solid, I mean,

it was like, it really wanted to be there, you know, I'm staying for the week, like, no, you're not, I have to, and it was, because it was so hard, the prick was so hard, it was quite painful, in me, and, like, in my foot, and, although I didn't have far to walk, to get home, it still was, you know, only like a five minute walk, but I was gonna, it would be quite difficult, to make that journey, with that prick in me, so, it's just, I couldn't hop, and I can hop, but I also

had Vinnie, to take care of as well, and he gives me enough funny looks, as do the neighbours, without me walking around, hopping, with one shoe in me hand, just saying to the neighbours, oh, sorry, I've got a prick in me, it's a prick, that's why I'm hopping, you know, it's that, I just don't need that, I just don't need that judgment, so I thought, I can try and sort it out now, what I really, really needed, was some kind of hammer, because the prick was so hard, I felt like I needed to knock it

out, so, it's kind of, I've got the prick there, I want to knock the prick, I want to knock it out, and I wanted a count, to see how many I had to knock, knock out, if I did have, you know, and there was only one, so I only had to knock out one, knock one out, and, and eventually, I managed to get it out, what a relief, and you know what, it wasn't a thorn, it wasn't bramble, it wasn't a, I thought maybe it was a bit of, like a splinter, you know, like a

bit of wood splinter, nope, it was a bit of metal, it was like a nail, but it wasn't a nail, but like a nail, nail like, in fact, it might have been a nail, I was going to say it wasn't a screw, yeah, so I'm thinking of screws now, so, so I wasn't, yeah, I wasn't dealing with a, with a hard screw, I was dealing with a hard nail, but it didn't, it didn't look to me like a nail, but I know for one thing, it really, I mean, luckily, lucky, it didn't, I mean, it

penetrated my shoe, and it got through, and it did dig right into the palms of my feet, but it didn't get through the skin, which I'm glad about, because that's a potential tetanus injection, isn't it, which I don't, after all that, the last thing I wanted was another thing being stuck in me, so it's, I got it out in the end, and it was, I mean, it wasn't big, but it was quite, I guess it was longer than I thought it was originally, and so it's quite a long prick that went through, because you think

about it, the thickness of your, of my soles of my shoes, probably a good, what, cut of inches, I don't know, maybe more, from the very bottom, from my bottom to the, to the inside the bottom bit, so from the outer bottom to the inside the bottom, it's got to be a good cut of inches, so it's, it must, I don't know, I don't know how, I don't know, I didn't measure, I didn't have my tape measure with me, because I wasn't expecting to, to need it, but I got it out in the end, I

was, honestly, I walked home, I was so glad to be ridden of, to be rid of that, that prick, because it was just, well, it was prickly, obviously, it did hurt, it hurt my foot, and I didn't know what it was to start with, but now I do know what it is, or was, and it's sorted, so I made sure, I thought, I'll make sure that no one else walks onto this, so I just place it very carefully on a driveway in front of the, the wheels of the car, because it seems like a good

place to put a nail, or so, that should be fine, at least no one will stand on it, so, so I'll get him back, I get Vinnie home, he starts going nutty, like, really barking continuously, running between rooms, running around, around, around in circles, bearing in mind, he just probably had the biggest run since I've had him, I mean, he really ran a lot, in, in the time that we were together, in, in the field, he didn't, he didn't stand still, hardly for a second, he was running pretty much half a length of field, then

running back, then again, and then back, then again, then back, then again, I don't know how many times, I didn't keep track, I forgot my notebook and pen, my little journal of how many times he runs up and down, I normally keep track of that stuff, but on this occasion, I forgot, and he was really playing up, like he was distressed, now I don't know if he was distressed, or if he was just excited, if he was over excited, maybe, perhaps the walk finished too quickly for him, but he really couldn't sit still, and he

was barking a lot, I mean, he does bark when we play, he barks a bit, and he barks when he wants something sometimes, and he barks when someone's at the door, but he's pretty good, he doesn't do too much barking, a bit too much for my liking, but I'm hoping he'll grow out of it, and he'll become accustomed to the local sounds of this particular environment, I'm hoping, that's my wish, it's not my only wish, and it's nowhere near the top of my list of wishes, it's pretty far down to be honest, yeah, it is

quite far down, in fact, even a new skateboard would probably be above that, and I've got no interest in having a skateboard, so yeah, it's not high up, being able to do a really, you know, bounce, bounce on the first front wheel, you know, bounce up and down on the front wheel of a BMX, I don't mean like bouncing on the wheel, but being the rider of the BMX bike, bouncing on the front wheel, I can never do that, and I did want to do that, and it is on the list, I'm starting to think

that maybe I need to revise that list, because there's things on there from when I was much younger than I am today, yeah, maybe I need to re-revisit the list, I mean, you know, I mean, I never called it a bucket list, and if I was, when I was at school, if I wrote a list called the bucket list, it would be a list of buckets that I wanted, you know, I was kind of literal back then, I suppose I still can be sometimes, now, even occasionally, quite literal, some would say pedantic, pedantic, I might

say thorough, or thorough, so I couldn't figure out what was going on with him, I went and laid down, thinking that maybe I could calm him down, if I lie down, and I'm calm, maybe he'll be calm as well, and he did follow me into the bedroom, he got onto the bed, and he kept moving around, and he was scratching, and what's going on, so before that, oh, before that, oh, let's go back a bit, in 1982, no, not that far back, no, it was a little joke, it was a time, a timeline joke, so

before that, I thought maybe he's got something stuck in his feet, or in between his, he's got webbed feet, I don't know if that's normal for a dog, Andre had webbed feet as well, I've got a couple of relatives with webbed feet, both my parents, so I kind of felt his feet, well, I felt his hands, and then I felt his feet, I couldn't feel anything apart from his hands and his feet, and I could feel them, but I couldn't feel anything, no prick sticking up, and my friend phoned up, I said, I can't talk

right now, and he said, why?

I said, I'm with Vinnie, I'm just trying to, just searching to try and find his prick, he hung up on me, and I couldn't find a prick anywhere coming out of his, because he did have one before, the first time we went into the field, I couldn't see it, but then after putting him into the bathroom, the bath, and spraying water onto his hands and his feet, and then brushing them, there was this bit of, it's like a splinter, it's quite large, I mean not, it wasn't big enough to keep you afloat if you'd been,

you know, been on a sunken ship, but it was, it definitely looks, it was a fair, fair size, so I think it might have been caught underneath one of his nails or something, a little bit of straw maybe from the field, well this time I thought, I'll do the same, I've done it twice before, and it usually calms him down, so I'm like, come on in, let's go into the bathroom, and he won't, he's just barking at me, I said, come on mate, go in the bathroom, so I'm standing inside the bathroom door, inside the

bathroom, yeah, in the door, well not in the door, not actually inside the door, but I'm in the bathroom, not out of the bathroom, and the bathroom's quite small, so it's not a long, not a big difference, distance wise, between being inside and being outside, so he's just looking at me, barking from outside the bathroom, refusing to come inside, so I'm not, I'm not trying to grab him, I'm not chasing him, I'm just saying, come on, inside please, come on, and he refuses, he's barking and barking and barking, so what I do is, I close

the door, so there's just a gap, a small gap, and he's looking at me through the gap, I think he's trying to tease me, he wants to know what I'm going to do next, he's probably thinking, well maybe I'll just give up and wash down my own feet and hands, I mean, why would I do that, but I had the door open just enough for him to get in, I said, come on, in, and eventually, it took about six or seven minutes, he came in, he voluntarily walked into the bathroom, so I had to stare

him down, and he came in, and I closed the door behind him, and he was standing by the bathroom door, and again, it's a very small bathroom, so I could pretty much reach him from outside the window, you know, it's not particularly big, I can have a bath and a poo at the same time, it's, I mean, technically we all can, can't we, but I mean, the bath and the toilet is very, very close, I can't soak my feet while I'm doing a poo, but yeah, so I did his feet and I did his hands,

and just the same process, I couldn't see if there was anything, I couldn't feel anything, I couldn't see anything, and I dried his feet and his hands with a towel, and then I let him, I put him down, and he's running around, he's shouting obscenities at me, and he's still making a big deal about it, still like fussing, so I'm on the bed, and he almost voluntarily lets me look at his hands, and he's focusing on one particular one, like with his tongue, licking it, and I'm looking, and one of his nails is curled, and

I think it's just a little bit too long, I've cut it before, it's one of the ones that doesn't seem to shorten by itself when he walks, so I'm thinking, okay, it's causing him problems, I'll cut it, now I've cut it before, and it was fine, would he sit still for more than a fraction of a second?

No, and I kept waiting, so please just sit still for a second, and he said, are you going to do the right one this time?

I said, okay, well now, four attempts, I'm going to do the right one this time, and I did cut it, but unfortunately, he moved just as I was doing it, and it bled a little bit, I didn't cut his finger off or anything, it just reached the root or whatever, and I pinched it with some toilet paper, like nice and hard, to stop the blood, and then he was just licking it, and he seemed okay after that, but he stopped playing up, so whatever was causing him agitation, it seemed to be stopped, unless he just

got so distracted by what I'd just done, now I didn't mean to, you know, and it wasn't, it was only slightly into the, I don't know what you call it, but because he's so tiny, I really, I guess I need someone to hold him down when I do it, but anyway, since then, he's been on the bed, he's still been running around a little bit, doing some weird things, but he's been a lot calmer, and I went to see him, see if he was okay, and he starts jumping up and down off the bed again,

okay, and I lay down on the bed sideways, not me sideways, but you know how when you lay on a bed, you've kind of got the pillows, and you lie down, so the bed's maybe five, six foot long, and you lie down kind of within that frame of height, rather, you know, because if you lie sideways, you just won't, you just can't take your whole body, unless it's a very wide bed, well, I lay down sideways, so pretty much just my bum and upper body was on the bed, and I'm just like cuddling him a

little bit, and he runs over to the pillows, so okay, and he charges at me, and he punches me in the face, like he lands on my face with both his hands, and he proper punches me right in the side of the face, it hurt, I mean, it was like wow, but it wasn't wow, because there was nothing wow about it, but it's like, ow, ouch, I didn't cry, not in front of him, but it's like, whoa, he proper, almost like put everything into it, pretty sure he didn't mean to do that, but when I

held my face, and I sat up, ah, and he just laid there looking at me, completely still, he went from being all boisterous, to just completely still looking at me, I was like, ah, because it did, I mean, it wasn't far away from my eyes, but then I did say the side of my face, so that's kind of obvious, I suppose, unless I had a really long head, but it's kind of human, human shaped, pretty much, well, kind of a sideways version, maybe, but he just looked at me, it's like he didn't know what to

do next, if he was worried, or if he could get away with laughing, he just didn't seem to know, and it's still, it doesn't feel tender now, making it up, well, not making it up, it did happen, when I haven't got a black eye or anything, but it was weird, he's like really jumped on my face, and, yeah, I suppose, he's been acting strange, I don't really know why, but it's just one of those things, really, isn't it, I guess, so I was actually going to talk about the news, because I've enrolled or subscribed, do

you remember we used to say enrolled, now it's subscribed, isn't it, I subscribed in, what's it called, behind me, reader, is it reader, how weird, I can't even, it doesn't even tell me what it's called, press reader, I subscribed to press reader, and it's basically, oh, okay, oh, where is it, press reader, okay, so it's just loads of newspapers, like the full, every page of a newspaper, and if I just go in the UK, UK, UK newspapers, publications, newspapers, news, I want newspapers, newspapers, UK newspapers, so I'm, I was going to read some stuff out,

I mean, I looked through one newspaper, and you know what, I couldn't find anything in the paper, there was actually of, well, anything nice, I know newspapers, you know, not necessarily supposed to be nice, it's not really, you know, what they're known for, but I just, I thought there might be something, but yeah, not really anything that's kind of, well, I want some funny stuff, just, or some humorous, or just something that's good news, am I really clutching at straws to, to want to see some good news in the newspapers, possibly, am I being naive,

possibly, it's, oh, yeah, can't see, yeah, can't see anything, and I've gone through two newspapers, and there's nothing, nothing, wow, that's a bit weird, so yeah, I just can't find anything to read, I might have to look through the newspapers first, before start in the podcast, and then, you know, kind of doing a ring, a ring around the roses, pocket full of, just find some stuff beforehand, and then read it during the podcast, rather than search, because, I mean, what am I reading now, I think it's, I don't know which it is, it's, it's, the

sign, it made me think I was, but here's where I stood, blimey, it's, I can't find anything, I mean, the adverts are better than the actual stories, they're more positive, I mean, look at this, how to create your dream kitchen, in as little as a day, without the nightmare price tag, that's the most positive headline, in the whole paper today, and that's an advert for kitchenrestoration.com, blimey, so, wow, wow, so, I, I, I don't know what, what paper this is, what is it, mail on Sunday, it's not Sunday today, why is this coming up then,

it's not Sunday, is it, it's Monday today, blimey, why did that come up, the mail on Sunday, okay, you've got the Guardian, the Daily Mail, Daily Telegraph, the Independent, the Observer, Sunday Telegraph, Daily Express, and the Mirror, and the Star, anyway, I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go now, but maybe I'll read some stuff out of the newspapers tomorrow.

Thank you for listening, please remember to be kind to yourself, because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love. Bye.