#774 Let me bore you to sleep - I HAVE VERTIGO - Jason Newland (3rd DECEMBER 2021)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com and letmeboreyoutosleep.com. This is hiccup.com. I got the hiccups. What a great, oh what great timing. Yeah, this is let me bore you to sleep.

My name is Jason Newland. I'm not drunk by the way. I've just got hiccups.

Yeah, please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. Oh dear, well, it's Friday the 3rd of December 2021. I'm hoping hiccups don't last the entire recording.

Oh, so, um, what should I say? I've got a story to tell you. I didn't make a recording yesterday. Let me bore you to sleep recording because I was in hospital.

Um, for not not overnight or anything, but I, uh, so let's start at the beginning. Okay. It was a Wednesday in August 1970 and I was born.

No, not that far back. Okay. I was in the shower and I had this really funny feeling that took over my whole body.

I've never experienced anything like it before. I was 12 and a half. No, not that far back either.

Okay. Um, I grabbed the, uh, okay, no, no, it's this. Let's just move on from that.

Okay. Vicks, Vicks, Vicks, Vicks, Vicks and Vaseline, similar jars, different job, different feeling. Not that far back.

Okay. So I, I can't remember which day it was because it's Friday today. So it probably Thursday.

I went to a doctor's Wednesday, probably Tuesday, maybe Wednesday. I forget. I got up, had my breakfast, had a cup of coffee, watched a bit of telly.

Did a little bit of internet stuff. Then I went back to bed for a while and I was laying on my right hand side and I got up and the whole room was spinning. That feeling that it's not the first time I've experienced it.

And previous times would be when I've been drunk, like really drunk. And it's been, it's gotta be a good six years since I was last drunk. Maybe five and a half years.

That's something that was at my brother's wedding. And yeah, that was so, and I've not, I've not really experienced that drunk feeling of the room spinning too often in my life. A few, a few times, but not that often.

But the only other time I'd experienced anything like this was when I perforated my eardrum back in, I think it was 2011. And I had, that was basically because I used to wear ear plugs to drown out the sound of background sounds so I could sleep. Now I've learned to sleep regardless of what's going on.

I can sleep during the day when there's two men in the garden strimming the hedges and mowing the lawn. Seriously, we're building work going on. I can, I can sleep through that now.

I can pretty much sleep through anything. I have trained myself. I have, I have bored myself to sleep so that just getting in touch with the reality that we're all born with the ability to just fall asleep.

Look at any toddler, any baby sitting in a high chair, they can fall asleep while they're eating. You know, a small child can fall asleep in mid conversation, especially with me. I can get adults doing that if they talk to me because I'm so tedious.

So when you get in touch with that reality that we were born with this, this is something we haven't had to learn. It's one of the few things in our lives that we haven't had to learn. We've had to learn to talk.

We've had to learn how to communicate. We've had to learn even how to wipe our own bums. You know, how to chew food.

I don't know how much of a learning that is, but I remember when I was a kid, I used to try and just, just stick it all in my mouth and swallow like a snake really. The amount of cutlery we used to get through, but eventually like no chew, move it, move it. That's it.

Move your mouth. That's it. The jaw up and down like that.

That's a good girl. So that was, that was nice. But falling asleep is not something we ever, ever had to learn.

Maybe it feels like we've maybe had to relearn it, but it's always been there. And you know, people say, oh, it's as easy as riding a bike. You know, you get back on the bike and you just can ride it.

I don't think that's a great analogy because I got onto a bike recently and I nearly crashed. Riding a bike isn't always that easy. If you haven't ridden a bike for years and years and years and years.

And the last time you rode a bike, you were maybe like me. I was probably about two stone lighter than I am now. And the last time I rode a bike, I didn't have to rest my belly on the handlebars like I do now.

By the way, I'm single. If there's any ladies, really, really desperate. I'm available for some loving.

Yeah. Anyway, falling asleep is really easy. Now, that might sound like a bit condescending.

I don't mean it. I don't care. No, I don't mean it to sound like that.

Because, you know, because, well, that's very uncompassionate or uncompassionate just to say stuff like that. You obviously don't care about people that have problems with sleeping. Well, I clearly kind of do, you know, otherwise, what have I spent 17 years making sleep recordings for? I do care.

And I do know what it's like to experience insomnia, because I had a lot of it when I was younger. I do know what it's like to have a mind racing. I don't know what it's like for you, because we're all different.

But I know what it's like for me. And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for me, because I know what it's like for you.

And I know what it's like for me. And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for me.

And I know what it's like for me. And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for you.

And I know what it's like for me. And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for me.

And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for me.

And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for me. And I know what it's like for you.

And I know what it's like for me. And I know what it's like for you. And I know what it's like for me.

And I know what it's like for you. Something I'll talk about that was 40 years ago.

Anyway My mathematical that I'm gonna talk about the stuff that happened at the hospital, don't worry I'm just gonna, I'm gonna lead it into it in a very very slow way And don't worry if you fall asleep before I get to that trust me I'll be talking about it again because it's well it's not much else happens in my life so I'll probably be talking about it for a few months anyway back in those days back in the 80s we didn't have now for those people some might not know this if you haven't worked in

a bar or a nightclub or behind a bar in a pub or a restaurant or even in a supermarket the tills were very different back then you know it was a case of typing in the amount that you were going to take and then put it in the amount that they gave you sometimes it was a case of just putting in the amount that it was so if the for a supermarket for example you put it basically just a calculator and then you press subtotal and it give the full amount so maybe 72 pound and

then you press open and whatever they gave you so say if they gave you a hundred pound you then have to give them the change the change wouldn't come up on the till wouldn't tell you how much so you wouldn't put in a hundred pound and then it tell you how much to give you'd have to work that yourself which is fairly easy I mean I did I didn't have no problem with that I was working I was using tills right from the age of 15 with my very first full-time job in the chip shop

so I was used to till work I was used to adding things up as well but with the chip shop I guess although the menu wasn't a small menu but you get used to it if you do the same job day in day out the only problem is when they change the prices and oh brilliant I got had another two pence on to that there there there but you know I kind of got used to adding up in my head at least a small amount of things otherwise I'd do it on the till and I'd

add it up that way but then I never made any no I never pretended to be a mathematician never you know I was always said that I need a little bit of need a calculator or something to help me with that stuff because I found it quite pressuring especially when there's an audience watching my brain hum as I try to work out how much it was supposed to be and giving change is easy I never I never struggled with that because I'd always count the change out so if the if it was like six pound

forty two and they gave me a ten pound note then I would just count back the money six forty two six forty five it can be two pence and they'd say no it's three pence to make it five and so okay there's three pence that's six forty five another five pence to make it fifty another fifty pence to make it seven pound and now another two pounds to make it ten there you go and they say no it's all wrong you got it wrong I say what you mean and you know we laughed it was

fun made a lot of new friends that way and so I knew how to do that that was fairly easy and then I worked in a supermarket again given the change easy you know you give the right amount of change it's quite easy count it back to them a lot of people like nowadays people don't count the change back not not anywhere that I go they just give it there to hand it to you there you go there's a change I always counted it back that way they can never come back and say you gave

me five pound too little or anything like that you know I count it back there you go including so they give me a twenty pound note and a thing costs four pounds seventy I'd make sure that I counted it back the five pound note and the ten pound note back to them so I felt I was okay with that and it was all just adding up I was constantly making mistakes with the adding up bit but I think part of that was because the just I'm not really sure why but it didn't suit me using

the tills the with the supermarket it was just constant huge you know people come there were big basketfuls big trolley full of stuff and a lot of distractions and queues and queues of people oh you know a lot of pressure and then some things would have the wrong price on or they didn't have a price on at all and I was to blame because I was the one that did the pricing as well because I'd be on the shop floor pricing things up and you know something that was just it didn't always go well but

not bad enough to get sacked but I think if I was still there I'd still be doing the same job I don't think I'd ever get promoted because I just wasn't if it was cut out for that kind of work really and not with those facilities I think now with a proper till that they are like now and they have been for a long time much easier just telling you how much to give back to the customer saves a little bit of time to sort of having to work it out because you know I'd be

counting twice I'd be counting to myself as I took the money out of the till and then I'll be counting it back to the person so now it just comes up on the till oh okay there's there's your money now go away so when I was working in the pub so that was the third job I had within about three years really two and a half years where well between 15 and 18 so once I got to 18 that was the third job that involved using a till and customer service and you know dealing with

the public so I struggled a bit with it because there's the dealing with drunk people and also the pressure of because you know pubs tended to go really busy then be quiet then be really busy and everyone wanted to drink at the same time and I'd make mistakes and again the tills it was just I just found it difficult to try and add up all the drinks in my head I think in the end I used to just write them down on a pad and then go from there and then you get people trying to

confuse you trying to see if they can pull a fast one and you know get you to charge less which I did quite often on my own anyway and so when anyone came in and they wanted to order a large amount of drinks all at one time they quite often wait for me to serve them because no they get a good deal but I never did on purpose I never like purposely gave drinks away for free I was just incompetent anyway during that period there's a reason for me telling you this I was so worried

about getting the adding up correctly adding up the drinks properly and giving people the right change and I couldn't sleep I literally couldn't get to sleep that was a bit of a wet sleep what a wet sleep that was and it was yeah I'd like a little bit bit of insomnia at that time because so worried about not getting it right and back then in those days I used to I guess catastrophize almost like you know it was the end of the world if it didn't go right like this was the most important thing in

the whole wide world me working in that pub and doing the job properly and when actually it was among the most pointless jobs I ever had I don't mean that as bar works pointless no I don't mean it in that way or working in a pub or working the hotel no not that but just the place I worked was just rubbish and you might think well why why are you saying that I'll tell you I'll give you an example I'll give you an example I think it was Christmas Day I think it was Christmas Day

it might have been Christmas Eve but it's one of the days over to Christmas holiday no staff were in just me so I don't know if a couple of staff had not turned up or they were late but it was just me in the bar on my own and I opened the doors and people came in and started to wreck the place because there was no one there to keep them in check they just basically started helping themselves to the alcohol now there was a lot of them you know this is probably about at least

two now there's probably about 10 12 people adult men and I was still a teenager at the time I'd only just turned 18 and I was I didn't feel an affiliation with the job to put my life at risk to prevent them from doing what they were doing what I did do is first of all I called the manager and the manager refused to come out of his office this is look there's no staff here first of all I told him there's no staff here because we weren't supposed to open the bar with just one

person on the bar because it was a very rough pub and they did you know you're supposed to be at least two people behind the bar at all times and he said no you've got to open so I opened the doors and then they just went there's almost like they were drunk before they even got in there and this was lunchtime they might well have been drunk actually and I said to him like none no one's turned up I'd gone in I'd got all the bar all ready cleaned everything done the pipes cleaned the pipes

for the beers and everything was for all ready to set up but no staff just me admittedly a lot of it was done the night before as well so there wasn't that much for me to do so I'm not a hero I'm not a hero in this story I'm a casual observer but I called through from the bar to the manager so I couldn't leave the bar you know if I leave the bar I'm sacked I was told so I stayed in the bar people just leaning over and helping themselves to the pumps you know

to the to the beer and I think what kind of people even walk behind the bar and I knew that I was just gonna get pretty much just get beaten up if I tried to stop them that's why I assumed all these you know it's too many of them like what am I gonna do and why put myself at risk but the manager refused to come out they would listen to him I'm pretty sure if he did come out and said what you're doing you know and but he was a coward obviously would not come

out so I said okay so I called the police I told the manager why you should call the police said no I said I'm gonna call the police said do you want but he refused to call the police he refused there was other staff in the hotel this is a hotel full of staff someone could have come out and just helped you know but nope so yeah the police came soon as the police got in there this next bit of stories made up because I don't remember but as soon as in my memory as soon

as the police got in there everybody started doing cartwheels and put on a little bit acrobatic show clowns jumped out of the ceiling and it was not it was nice it was very very festive but that's just my memory I don't know if that actually happened or not but the point is that's that's an example of how unprofessional that place was another example is I worked I didn't go to my nan's for Christmas and I was invited but I didn't go because I was working but I was gonna have Christmas around my nan's I was

gonna have New Year's Day around my nan's instead of Christmas so that was gonna be my chance to see my nan and my family so I worked every day through Christmas Christmas Eve Christmas Day Boxing Day every day all the way through to New Year's Eve so I was there day and night all the way through Christmas I think Christmas Day was just a lunchtime that was it but you know by the time we got home it was probably about 5 4 or 5 in the afternoon and I'm not sure if they were open Christmas

Day night time I don't remember anyway I worked every day and then and it was busy busy busy busy busy New Year's Eve of the busiest night of the year pretty much very bit of work I even remember I even remember what I had for dinner that evening because I don't think they normally gave us dinner but on that night they did and it was chips chicken not drumsticks what are the ones the little dippers kind of chicken dipper things and maybe beans or something and it all I remember is it was beautiful it was

almost like the best meal I'd ever had in my life partly because I hadn't probably had a cooked meal all week and secondly so hungry I'd been working so hard it was non-stop which meant a lot of people got cheap drinks because my inaccurate counting well at the end of the night we were cleaning up and they cashed up and the management the manager says to me the tools are short I said yeah he said the tools are short again I said yeah so now the one thing I know about me is regardless of how

incompetent I was on a till I would never make the till short because I might charge too less to too little for the drinks by act by not calculating correctly but I would always put the right whatever amount I put into the till it might be it might be in a case of it it should have been 15 pound 45 for the drinks that someone bought and I might charge maybe 11 pound 25 because I got the numbers wrong but I would only ever put 11 pound 25 into the till you know onto this which

would be registered and then I would give them the correct change for what they gave me because I would always count it out to them so I would never give the wrong change I mean I'm sure occasionally my I might have accidentally given well I can't imagine it but it was a chance if if another person in the bar because we all shared one till I think if another person the bar had put a ten pound note in the five pound note section because it was so busy and because it was quite dark at times

and all the distractions there's a chance I might have given someone a ten pound note instead of a five pound note unlikely but it's a possibility if someone had put it in the wrong part but that's the only way that would happen you know I can I can be honest about my incompetence but I can also be honest about my competence and if you count back twice the money that you're about to give someone back the change then you can't really get it wrong because I count it as I took it out the till and

I count it into their hand well to tell me that they're basically accusing me of not doing a job properly or stealing and I said to him if I was gonna steal money out of the till I wouldn't just take the money out of the till because you can see that the till is short I wouldn't leave the till short I would do it in a way where the till was correct so someone you know I say to him like so someone ordered nine pounds worth of drinks and I would then put perhaps four pound

into the till and then keep that other five pound but I'd only put four pound I wouldn't put nine pound into the till and he said well it sounds like you really are a thief I said no I'm just saying I'm saying if I was gonna do that I would cover my tracks if I was that way inclined to steal but I'm not a thief he said are you sure I said yes and put that big light away stop shining in my eyes and please untie my hands I'm not very comfortable in this chair it's

like just leave me alone I'm not a thief and he said well in that case I think the weird thing is because I was young they I think they felt they could just talk to me any way they wanted and in a way they kind of did get away with it to a degree to a degree and I said to them they said what gonna do is you're gonna have to have training tomorrow so you have to come in lunchtime or come in at 10 o'clock tomorrow morning and we'll do extra training I said no

I can't come in tomorrow I'm not working tomorrow and I'm my grandparents and my family for dinner for New Year's Day and that's that you know that's booked and was not booked I mean it's not a restaurant there's no reservations and my Nan didn't phone and say just make sure you're actually gonna be coming because we do have a reserves people waiting to for the table like no there's a list no I don't care about the listening no I'm coming and they said well if you don't come you're sacked if you don't come that's it

don't bother coming back you're sacked and I said to her I'm not coming tomorrow that's it and they said well it's up to you if you don't turn up you're sacked so I didn't turn up and that was it didn't go back next thing I hear is and this is from the people that work that go in there to drink I saw them outside of the place and they said to me oh the manager and the other staff are telling all the customers that you were sacked for stealing they were saying that about me not

you who's listening obviously you didn't work there no but me like that I was sacked for stealing from the till and like now in this day and age I could have took them to court and you know for whatever but it's easy to say that I don't even want to add it up was it 33 years ago Wow 33 years Wow it's quite weird to think about it because that manager probably in his 70s now if not older I'm not a thief I've stolen stuff but I'm not a thief you know you mean you're not

a thief but you've stolen stuff no but you know most of the things I've stolen was when I was like very very young like a Mars bar from the supermarket and that was only because I ate it before I got to the till and I thought well I did wait to pay for it but they just ignoring me you know so so little no one could see me but why I was still at the till waiting to pay but they just I thought oh if you're gonna ignore me I'll just go I'll walk out and

I did another time I've remorated the jewelers but you know that's that's like months ago I don't really that won't really count I'm not really a thief I'm not not really that way inclined I don't take money but I'm not like stealing out of a till it's not really my thing besides and I still stick to it now if I was gonna steal out of a till I would not put in more I would not leave the till short at the end of night because that's just dumb it's really dumb dumb dumb mind you I

did realize that the best way to steal is if you're working with someone that's really really rubbish at the job and they're bound and they're probably gonna get sacked that's a good time to steal from the till make it so the till is short and as soon as they leave or get sacked stop stealing and then everyone's like oh Jason's not here anymore and now the tills are all correct it must have been him all along and then it just means you gotta follow me wherever I go and work so you can take advantage of

my incompetence and lie in your own pockets so yeah so that's that's a job I had that was pretty awful but then the next time I worked in a pub or in a bar setting was at Butlins in 95 over the Christmas period that was much different apart from being the most busiest I've ever been in any job ever I mean that was there were thousands of people in that place I think they had three or four bars in a huge venue huge and the drinks people were queuing all night literally I think there might

be one little lull there at time when there was no one queuing it was solid for I don't know whatever time 6 30 7 o'clock until 11 so four or five hours solid I've never had a job like that in my life where it was just you know the thing about it is we all had keys like swipe keys or whatever for the till there was quite a few tills and they had managers that were there to help so it was very well run and there's as much help as you wanted they knew not everyone

knew what they were doing and it helped you out there was so it's really good it was very hard job very like physically not physically I don't know it's just to have it constant and then you've got people from all over the world but even all over the country asking for drinks and a lot of different accents and it's not always easy to hear what anyone's saying when there's that many people there you know it's very loud so like to hear someone's voice like okay and then to get the drinks correct and then there was

young people trying to get drinks and I'm to turn them away to get ID you know that stuff so which I've never really had to deal with before and but with the key you could go type and put the key in or the weather I think it was a key or something and you can start to work out the what someone's drinking but it was always it was you know named everything was named on the till very easy big old tills and everything was named so there's no having to work out anything but you could

also get some drinks and then someone says oh and also can you do that didn't matter because you left the till you take your swipe your key out and then when you put your key back in what you're doing before still on there but in between that someone else has used their key and done their stuff so it's very it was like top of the range till that I had so that was I got through that okay actually I don't think the tills were short and it wasn't and if they were they could tell by

because everyone had to log in themselves so they could check every individual person and mine was pretty much fine what's that noise I don't hear the weird it might be all the paper that I took off the wall because there's been a lot of changes in the last few days the everything's kind of gone a bit pooey to be fair the stats have gone down today or yesterday eleven thousand seven hundred and twenty two downloads that's the worst day I've had in months and months months and months it's a very very poor day today so

far days nearly over thirteen thousand six hundred and sixty three again one of the worst days I've ever had for a long time and that's just due to the changes in the podcast what I'm allowed to do not allowed to have ones that are really long with music so I had to get rid of them and I have started to decided to make recordings two versions one with music one without but the same length so background music just for the length of the recording so if it's 15 minutes or an hour or two hours or

30 minutes or whatever that's how long the music one will be so at least you'll have a choice of those two for all new recordings and I'm going to try and do the same for some of the older recordings as well then I can put that on the website but outside of that I'm thinking of ways of maybe making some longer recordings and I've got a few ideas but it's a lot of work but I'm looking into it I really am looking into it oh yes because otherwise what's the point it's very difficult well I

personally find it very difficult to go backwards to go back you know to go from I mean literally what Friday Thursday Wednesday Tuesday Monday Sunday Saturday so Saturday Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday so Friday today 13,615 yesterday Thursday 11,722 Wednesday 16,238 downloads so you see how it's gone down if I go back to was it Tuesday Friday Thursday Wednesday Tuesday 21,500 Monday 32,000 downloads Sunday 38,000 downloads Saturday 36,000 so you see how it's gone down Saturday 36,000 Sunday 38,000 Monday 32,000 Tuesday 21,500 and that's a drop of 10,000 already and then another drop down

to 16,000 and then yesterday 11 just under 12,000 and today just under 14,000 I mean that's to drop from just in that short period of time it's because I deleted a lot of the well all of the recordings with long music like 10 hours long and 5 hours long and 2 hours long got rid of all of them because the terms and conditions says I'm not allowed to do that anymore yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so I'm looking at ways to get around that but to have such small statistics like 11 you know just 12,000

downloads a day it's just too small and I know some people say well that's not bad it's 3 million a year okay true but to go from 38,000 down to 12 in 1 2 3 4 days that's awful it's like really really bad I mean there was a time the years my dream is to reach 10,000 downloads in a day it's it's not really my dream anymore I dream my dream now is to not go below that please don't let me go below that because I almost feel like just packing it all up I worked

so hard to get to where I was and now just for one little thing one change in terms and conditions and it's buggered me and I'm back almost like back to the beginning of the year and it might take to get back to the to get nearly 40,000 downloads a day might take me it might take another five years to get to that and I don't know if I've really got the patience for it anymore to be waiting so I need to you know it's not just it's not the only thing I'm focusing on but

it was I don't know I was getting I was enjoying it I was enjoying the rise and how's you know getting 830,000 downloads last month in November this month I might get well 10,000 10,000 that's 300,000 in it so what's that as a drop of over half a million in one month I say a lot if you say it slowly or quickly it's a lot to drop over half a million downloads a month and I'm kind of almost not willing to do it but what can I do what can I do we will see we

will we will so what about the hospital then okay I'll tell you about a hospital the other day I woke up I told you the my the room was spinning and then I laid down again to happen again and I thought oh and so I thought oh I don't like this and I tested it I did a few things move my head around and I played with my ears and my ears weren't hurting didn't seem to have anything going on there and then then I thought I'd leave it maybe it's a one-off happened again the

next day and so I phoned up there's no point phone up the doctor's surgery because it could be an appointment in like six weeks or something so that's that's of no use so I phoned up one one one which is like non-emergency telephone number where they do well I guess triage I think it's probably called on the phone figure out whether or not you need medical advice or middle if you need medical attention and you give me symptoms and you answer lots of questions so I did that they were gonna get a doctor to phone

me the doctor phoned me or some special someone anyway and they said we need to get to your urgent the urgent medical ward or whatever hospital at the hospital I said okay so I did went got a bus to the hospital well two buses in fact got to the hospital went to the wrong place got directions and I didn't realize it moved it used to be the walk-in center the changed the name of it has moved to a different building and the building is literally in the hospital it's next to the entrance and just before

the accident emergency I think so I found the right place went in and was seen straight away the I went in and said I've got your yeah one one one sent me here and I had to fill a form in and then I was seen there was two doctors one was observing so I don't know if he was a trainee doctor or he was just waiting for the other doctor to have his finishes you know finish so he could go go to lunch together or something I don't know but he tested he gave me tested

my blood pressure which was a bit high he said are you a bit anxious I said yeah I mean everyone's a little bit anxious I don't know if they're in the hospital being tested you'd be almost non-human if you didn't if it didn't affect you a little bit but I try and they never listen I noticed this with doctors never listen and I said I said to him look my blood pressure is always perfect and he's not listening to this I said okay because you know the blood pressure being high might be of importance considering

I've had my blood pressure tested lots of times and it's always perfect like perfect perfect he didn't listen I said look you talk about am I anxious I have been to hospital twice thinking there was something serious and it was an anxiety attack and even then my blood pressure was perfect didn't it it's like I said it and they just bounced off the walls didn't hear me I said okay I'll give up then you're not listening and he eventually took his headphones off he said all that was I loved ABBA I know that I can't

wait for the new album what I was just like what are you doing he said I'm an ABBA fan what you got an issue with that I said no I'm just I thought you'd be concentrating on me he said me mamma mia never let me go that surely that that's not listen to ABBA it's not the name of the game is it being a doctor that's the name of the game doo doo doo doo doo doo oh mamma mia and in the end you know I said look the winner takes it all I can't think

of any any other puns I can't think of any any puns really but anyway that didn't happen he he then did all these neurological tests on me to see whether or not I was like seriously ill like looking at my eyes and get me to follow his fingers my eyes and he kept saying keep your head still and I said I don't want to I just like turning my head he said why I said because your fingers are so weird I can't and he said that's rude I said I know but he didn't listen to

me about the blood pressure so why should I listen to you and he said that's a good point he said what you doing you want to fancy going for a dinner later I said no no I'm not impressed with you at all he said what about the ABBA songs that I sung to you earlier I said well yeah that was nice but you know you didn't listen about the blood pressure and he said what if I do a little dance for you I've got a pole over there do you want to do a little dance

I said no I'm here for medical surgery not surgery but medical attention and I'd really like to get to the bottom of that he said what about the bottom of this put your trousers back on please doctor this is inappropriate at this time later on we can we can no none of that happened and he said I was certain things like holding my hand up push my hand up push my hand away lift your leg up and I did it all at one point said squeeze my hand I thought he really is flirting with me

he's like and I squeezed it before I don't want to I don't act all macho and try and crush his hand but I got just so it was almost like a gentle squeeze so I didn't want to make out that I was trying to you know when people hold it when people shake hands and they crush your hands those kind of people now they do that on purpose there's a few people that are just really really strong and not really very aware of their own strength and there are a few people like that is this

it's not you know that's that's a fact some people are just they will won't mean to crush your hand they're almost they're just gripping and then I realized that they don't notice the screaming which you think they would when you but most I'd say most people that crush your hand it's just pretense it's bravado it's just trying to show off look how strong I am when we could all do that we could all like really like put it all in to crush someone's hand during a handshake but I'm not in there I'll do a weak

a weak slash firm handshake because first I've got nothing to prove except proof itself I've got nothing to prove at all but then some people sort of like managers and I've heard people say this like you know company bosses I'd never trust anyone with a weak handshake well you're clearly a bit silly then aren't you?

I've shook hands with doorman I've shook hands with people, boxers, people that were that were tough and some of them had the and it wasn't weak gentle a gentle handshake because none of them were weak you know probably all of them could have crushed my fingers if they wanted to but they didn't because they got nothing to prove someone that trying trying crushes your hand are trying to prove something so I would say don't trust anyone who crushes your hand because they're a fake I don't know if it's true or not I made all of

that up might be true so the doctor said to me after doing all these things he said I looked into my ears he said your ears are perfect I said thank you you really are flattering me today I'm gonna blush in he said no that's just because you've got a red face you're not blushing at all you really need to sort your skin out I said just just okay you give and then you take away don't you give the compliments and you say why what is with you you're playing hard to get or you're just

a bitch I mean what what's going on and he said well I am a bit bitchy sometimes and I said well what's your diagnosis or your prognosis and he said I don't know is there a difference is it the same thing diagnosis and prognosis I said no I think diagnosis is when you diagnose something prognosis is more what is the outcome going to be like what do you put how do you perceive the outcome of maybe taking the medication or treatment and you know how long will this last you know that's that's more what prognosis

means diagnosis is where you where you go on to Google and you just answer a few questions and you come up with a diagnosis that anyone could have done in their own home he said oh but I couldn't have done all those neurological tests that was the important thing and you know they really need to they seemed to know what they were doing and he said to me well you have vertigo I said okay he said now you can wait for two hours or two or three hours to see another doctor and they will tell

you that you got vertigo and they might stick you on an ECG machine to check your heart and stuff I don't know or you can just take these tablets take my word for it that you got vertigo take these tablets for five days gave me a prescription and if the spinning hasn't stopped then you need to contact your doctor I said okay I'll take that thank you bye and then what else happened that was it really what I have discovered though is because I couldn't get the tablets yesterday because it's too late I went to

a pharmacist a chemist where the bus got when I got off the bus and the queue was huge I'm talking there was at least 25 people queuing never seen that many people ever queue for a prescription in a prescription area this is a drive through so I think perhaps they were given priority to the drivers which I don't think's right because I just I think anyone it can anyone that could be bothered to get out their car to go inside the store should have priority over someone that's in a car apart from those listening that

use it and and they do it in the car you should get priority over the people inside the store apart from those you listening that go into the store then you should get priority over people in a car you see where I'm going with that basically if you listen to this you you can do you want I think you're you're brilliant and I think I'm I just I just thrilled I'm just thrilled to be in your company that's what I'm with that for some reason so yeah I got the tablets this afternoon so I went

up got them today and I've taken two tablets one I just swallowed and then the second time that I had earlier about an hour ago two hours ago I remember the doctor said you need to put it under your tongue and let it dissolve and I thought okay so I did that I know it's horrible left my tongue a bit numb why is that got cocaine in it what's going on or novocaine or whatever is there a difference I've got no how would I know how would I know and see yeah what I did discover

is one way to make it easier is to sit up in bed and close my eyes and then lay down and it reduces it by that 90% I said this to a friend earlier he said why don't you just take the medication I discovered a way of reducing of you know introducing relief basically it's relief from it just simply by closing your eyes before you lay down we'll take the medication I'm not gonna I'm still gonna tell a medication surely if there's a way to make things a bit easier a bit you know why wouldn't

you do it so I'm spreading the word on this this is a new thing though this whole thing isn't new it's a new situation but I managed to find something that was useful that helped but I've taken two tablets so I'm hoping this had a bit of an effect I'm guessing that it must be the inner ear which I don't have access to through sticking cleaning stuff in my ear I say cleaning stuff I'll tell you exactly what it is it's not Optrex what's it called Otex ear drops so I use I use that I

bought that when my ears were blocked not with wax but just I couldn't hear any right 50% that's when my left ear started echoing so you know some would say that's like tinnitus or tinnitus tinnitus but that didn't last long and then it just went into half did my earring just my ears just felt like they had ear plugs in I don't wear earplugs anymore so I'm hoping all is well sniff sniff so that is what I'm hoping so I'll let you know how I get on other than that I'm sure there's other things to

talk about but I can't remember so I'm gonna go thank you for listening remember to be kind to yourself be gentle with yourself lots of love