#749 Let me bore you to sleep - NO FLIGHT CRUISES - Jason Newland (12th OCTOBER 2021)

Hello, welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. This is Let Me Bore You to Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

Hey, how you doing? Are you alright? Are you alright? You doing okay my friends? My little dumplings. Oh blimey. I'm tired.

I do this and I'm going to bed. That's it. That's my plan.

I don't have many plans. But that's my plan. I'm going to bed baby.

I'm going to go to bed. Oh dear. I've got an itchy beard.

Don't blame me. It's not my fault. I can't help having an itchy beard.

I didn't plan to have an itchy beard. It wasn't part of my, you know, wasn't part of my whole schedule to have an itchy beard. No, it wasn't.

No, no, no, no. Yeah, you know what? Doesn't feel like a weekday today. Feels like a Sunday.

Is that strange? You're strange. No, but is it strange? Do you think that it feels like a, I don't know, a weekend? As opposed to a, well it was Tuesday today. It was Tuesday.

Yes, yes, it was. It was Tuesday. Indeed it was.

I don't know why I'm singing like this. I really don't know why. It was Tuesday all day long.

Anyway, hey, what's happening? Anything? Anything happening? I woke up and yeah, I woke up as you do. I woke up and I was very tired today. Very tired.

Woke up feeling very tired and went back to bed. So, I had my breakfast, went back to bed, woke up feeling a bit tired again, went back to bed and never really got my mojo going at all. Not that I've got much of a mojo these days but I kind of couldn't be bothered to do anything today.

Now, this is my third recording so I actually have done something but I wasn't hugely motivated, if I'm honest, to do anything. I started a boring recording yesterday, no, early this morning and I did that but then I just couldn't be bothered. I did a deep sleep whisper one couple of hours ago.

It's very strange, very strange. I'm not quite sure what's going on. I guess it's okay to have days like that but then my friend phoned me last night saying, do you want to come to the supermarket tomorrow? Because we like to plan, we like to plan exciting days out and I said, all right, you know, we could go at 11.

I came and knocked at half quarter to 11 and he wasn't very well. I thought he was getting ready so I said, well, give us a knock when you're ready or give us a ring. Two hours later, nothing.

So, I felt like I've just been hanging around waiting for something that didn't happen because, you know, I needed a few little bits and so in the end I just gave up on that, ordered a delivery instead. So, I don't know, I just found it a little bit annoying, a little bit annoying, just a little bit, just a little bit, a little bit, a little bit, a little bit annoying. So, yeah, that was it.

I didn't do anything. I kind of really didn't do pretty much anything at all today and I don't like that. I mean, you say, well, you've done three recordings.

Yeah, but I had other stuff to do. There's lots of coursework, lots of, it's just so much to do with this stuff that I've not done. I've not updated my website for ages.

I used to update it every day and now I just, I haven't, I'm so behind. And it's just a bit weird. I don't know really what to, what to think of it all.

Isn't it, eh? What do you think? Bit weird, bit, bit, bit, bit, bit, bit weird, bit weird. So, I thought earlier on, because I've been in bed for a fair bit of the day, that maybe I can get on with it tonight, you know, during the night, listen to some music and just get focused and do some stuff, make the images for the podcasts, you know, share it, you know, put it onto the, just basically update my website, which is going to take me probably a good six hours of work to get that updated, if not, if not more, at least about six hours, because it's got to be 20 plus recordings. It's probably a week since I upload.

So how many did I do last week? Three, even at three a day, it's 21, plus this week, 23, 24, 25, 26. So it might be nearly 30 recordings that I need to upload to my website. And I've stopped keeping track of things as well.

So I normally have a list of every recording I do in order, so I can have them in order on the website. I stopped doing that because I ran out of paper. All I had to do is just turn the page over and start on a new page.

But the effort, you know, I'm very, very lazy indeed. So I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know what to say, I really don't. So as I do this, I'm also uploading the Boring Objects podcast to one of the podcasts that I forgot to upload it to. So it's not really a distraction, because it's just like, click upload, it's not that difficult.

It doesn't take that much brain power, which is lucky because I have about 2% left of my brain power. About 2% left of my brain. I watched this documentary the other day on animals, it was called The Seven Deadly Sins of Animals.

And it was horrible. And it wasn't like, it wasn't a YouTube video, it was horrible things, it was actually an actual, I think it was National Geographic documentary. And it was horrible.

The stuff they were showing was just, and you might think, well, why do you watch it for then? Well, like horrible stuff, that's why. No, I just, I was fascinated, I guess the title kind of fascinated me a little bit. But I didn't know what I was going to end up watching.

What was going to be end up, what, that's not even a sentence, is it? It's not even a proper sentence. I don't know where I get this stuff from. I really should be able to talk whole sentences without, you know, getting it wrong.

I've been talking for a long time in my life. I spoke to another friend on the phone for about an hour. So that was another hour where I wasn't working or doing anything.

But we're talking about the need to, not the need, but the want, maybe the need to get away, have a break, go somewhere new. And I think partly, I've always had that, because I've moved around so much in my life. That need for moving on and living somewhere new, somewhere different was always fulfilled.

Because I never stayed anywhere for very long. This is the longest place I've ever lived outside of the family home, which I moved out of when I was 15. And I was there from the age of what? I don't know, nine, I'll put it eight, eight and a half, something like that.

I don't know. Between eight and nine, maybe nine. Honestly, I do lose track.

Let's say nine and 15. So for six years, I was six and a half years I was living in that house. I've lived here longer than I lived there.

In April, it'll be seven years. It was 2015, April that I moved here. And it'll be April 2022.

So that's seven years, isn't it? Wow. Amazing. Or not, depending on how you look at it.

Boring, probably. But I'm getting itchy toes now. I'm kind of, no, it's not athlete's foot.

I'm getting, I'm getting, it's a term for wanting to sort of move on. Not everyone's going to know what the term means, are they? The expression. Itchy knuckles.

I just, I don't think it's that I want to move somewhere new, although I do. But I don't think it's just that, it's seeing the same thing every day. Kind of seeing the same people every day.

It doesn't, doesn't do it for me. Maybe that's why I never bothered trying to have a sort of a long term relationship. Or even friendship, really, you know, just seeing the same person every day.

You wake up and it's the same person. They're still there. What are you still doing here? Why, why didn't you, why can't you sneak out during the night and run away? Why are you still here? Many women have said to me.

And I just, I don't know. I'm feeling the urge to move or to travel. I definitely want to travel.

And I've never really wanted to travel before. But if I had the finances and I had the. Yeah, if I had the finances, I would get onto a ferry right now, like tomorrow morning.

Get on a ferry and just travel away. But I want to get on a ferry and not have to get on planes. Because for me, part of the reason I get onto a, not a ferry, a cruise.

The idea of being on a cruise is to not fly. That's kind of, isn't that part of the reason? Bashed the microphone. I'm having real problems with my back, man.

It's ridiculous. I'll put it up at the top. It might be this chair.

So I didn't have this problem with the middle of my back before I got this chair. And I bought this chair because it's supposed to be ergonomic or whatever it is. It's supposed to be good for your back.

Unless my back was just already misaligned. And now the chair's forcing my back to strength, to, I don't know, to go in the opposite way to what it was already at. And my back might be kind of set in a position it's already in, which is causing it to be problematic.

Did any of that make sense? I'm not sure. I don't know. I'm really not sure.

Anyway, all I know is my lower back is giving me hardly any problems compared to in the middle of my back. It's annoying me now. It's actually annoying me.

So what I'll do, I'm going to have a look online together and look for some holidays. Now I'm looking for something cheap. I'd like a cruise, but I don't have any money.

I don't know if there is such a thing as a cheap cruise. Is there? Answer me. I'm waiting.

Are there cheap cruises? Just be silent. Hello? Is anyone there? Seriously, answer. I'm not in the mood for games.

I'd like to. The problem with the cruises is there's no cruises near here that I know of. Now, I know Harwich has ferries because I've been on one.

I went to Amsterdam about 19 years ago. But I. Well, that's not the last time I went to the Isle of Man. That's a different country, isn't it? I mean, it's an island.

As far as I'm concerned, if it's an island and there's water surrounding it and there's no other land connected to it, that's a country. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's what I think. And let's face it, we're in a world where beliefs are everything.

Gotta respect my belief. OK, the world is flat. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for what I said. But you aren't an imbecile. The world is flat.

You're right. I shouldn't argue if that's your belief. Oh, come on.

Why is the internet messing around? Don't mess around, internet man. I don't like it. I don't want it to be doing that.

No. Ah, my podcasts. My podcasts.

So I'm going to look to see if there's any kind of cheap deals. Just want to get an idea, you know? Just want to get an idea. Just to have a look.

Just to see if there's anything that might be... Ah, you know, something that might be doable, but not now because I can't do anything now. But I'm just thinking in the future, then maybe not the too distant future. I thought about Spain.

And I find it interesting how I mention places and people say, Oh, you don't want to go there, but shut up. I want to say shut up. I don't.

But I want to say shut up because I don't care what people's opinions are. Like not even for a second. I'm not even... I'm interested in facts, not opinions.

Opinions mean nothing to me. Nothing to me anymore. Other people's opinions, belief systems doesn't mean anything to me anymore.

I'm not interested. I want facts, just pure facts. You know, if you got a very pertinent piece of information about a place.

So if I said, Oh, I want to go to Afghanistan. Well, there's a few facts you could give me there. That I probably maybe would dissuade me from going.

But opinions ain't going to do nothing. It doesn't... I'm not interested. Oh, I want to go there.

It's full of sand. What do you think I was going to say? It's full of sand. Well, I actually like sand.

I don't know what your problem is with sand, but I like sand. I think you need to have a word with yourself. I like sand.

It's my favorite thing. It's not. I'm thinking maybe.

Where can I go? Spain. Somewhere like, um, not Tenerife. Gibraltar supposed to be quite nice.

I want to go somewhere that's not expensive. Now, if I was going to go to somewhere in Europe. I would very much likely would want to pick a all-inclusive holiday.

You know, so that I've got everything there. I can't drive, so I can't do me own excursions. I... I'm not going to be searching around for cheaper accommodation.

Because I can't speak the language. And we can no longer stay in other countries like we used to. Yeah, I can't go like, you know, I can't just go to Spain and live there anymore.

Thanks to the people that made that so. And I like the idea of that. I like the idea of being able to go.

Because, okay, fair enough. Um. Having somewhere like Bulgaria was of no use to us.

In a... In a sense of reciprocation, you know. So, yeah, people from Bulgaria could come here for as long as they wanted. Which I don't care about.

I'm not interested. It's up to them. But we could go there.

But why would we want to? There's no... You can't go there. They can come here and work. We can't go there and work.

Because there's nothing there. That's why they moved here. But in Spain, there's bar jobs.

There's... There's some work you can get. France, the same. Because these are countries that are doing well, generally.

But Poland, again. What are we going to do? I'm going to move to Poland and do what? Ride a donkey around? I don't know. I mean, I'm not... If you've got money, that's good.

Because you can live there. And you can have a nice life. And probably live like a king if you're wealthy.

Build your own mansion and stuff. And, you know, have a family. All that stuff.

But if you're going out to work... I'm going there to work so I can send money back to my family. If you... If an English person goes out to Poland to work, they'd have to have money sent to them by their family. So they could survive in Poland.

Now, Polish, when they came here, they were making money. And they sent the money back to their family. You see what I mean? It'd be like a different kind of situation.

Almost turned on its head, you might say. I used to know a lot of Polish people. I worked with them.

And they preferred it before they were allowed to be officially legally working there. Because they didn't have to pay any tax. Had cash in hand jobs.

As soon as the EU... They joined the EU back in, I don't know, 2001? Was it? 2002? Suddenly they had to pay tax. They didn't like it. A lot of them went back home.

Because, you know, it wasn't worth it. Suddenly to have, I don't know, 20% of your money taken off. That's quite a big chunk.

I'm guessing. I don't know. Because, you know, I don't think English people... Well, maybe some do.

But I imagine most English people can't really comprehend the idea of what it's like to go to another country to earn money, to send money back to their family. You know, to go to another country and work in a kitchen washing dishes so that you can send money back to your family. That's an alien concept here.

And if you break it down, they're pretty amazing people. Do they will come away, move away from their family into a country that doesn't like them, generally? There's a lot of very, a lot of dislike towards Eastern Europeans here. I don't know what I normally get.

You know, it's not something that's generally spoken out loud. But the amount of people that I know and met, they just don't... I've really kind of got an issue with them. And I've, I can honestly say, I've never, I've worked with Eastern Europeans loads, loads and loads, known lots of them.

I've dated two or three or four, I don't know. And I must admit, I don't think I've ever met one that I actually liked. No, I'm joking.

I've never met one that I didn't get on with. Met loads of English people I didn't like. You're anti-English.

Oh, to the tower. No, I just, I don't really get it. I mean, I think what it is, I think I figured it out.

All these years, people have been thought, you know, people on the other end of this dislike or whatever, have been put it down to racism and put it down to, you know, how the color of their skin or whatever. It's just, I think it's just hatred. I think English people just, or maybe the Western world, you know, just have to, it's almost like they need to hate.

They have to have a target to hate. It's very weird. I don't quite get it.

It's very strange. They're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're strange. I'm not, you know, I don't quite understood it.

I don't quite understood it. When I was brought up in the seventies, where it was encouraged to dislike people because of the color of their skin or their sexuality. It was encouraged.

It was like, you shouldn't like someone that has a single sex relationship because it's wrong. It says it in your Bible and it's wrong. And you, all that stuff.

And for those really young people, you're not going to realize, but you might be aware of it. But in the seventies and eighties, even in the eighties, which isn't that long ago. Of course, if you were born in the nineties or if you're 20 and you're born in 2001 or something, then you know, the eighties and nineties a long time ago.

But just remember, if you're only, you're only 20, 20 isn't a long time. 30 years isn't a long time. 40 years.

So 20 years before you were born, if you're 20 now, being racist on television was acceptable. It was funny. It was classed as funny.

Comedians would come on and be racist and be homophobic. Check out some Jim Davidson shows that he did on television in the early eighties. Now I'm not pinpointing him because it was, it wasn't just him.

It was everyone. So he gets a hard time and he shouldn't really. Well, I don't think you should just for the simple fact that all of the comedians were doing the same thing.

Even sitcoms that are classed as absolute classics had homophobic jokes or racial jokes or that kind of stuff. So there you go. See, education.

Didn't know, did you? Didn't realise. I mean, I know that probably most people think of this country as being so advanced. But I haven't always been.

Very, very backward in some ways. But we didn't know any different. I didn't know any different.

I was brought up watching the black and white minstrels on television. That's where white men, maybe even women, charcoal their faces and sung. I don't know what kind of singing that was.

Was it like Barber Quartet kind of singing? Or funny boy or whatever. I don't know. And perhaps I shouldn't do an impression of it.

And then there was comedians would actually come on camp and the audience were laughing at them being camp. So basically making fun of gays, even though they might have been gay themselves. There is the amount of characters where in sitcoms that were camp or and it was a TV show called In Sickness and In Health, and then it was called To Death Do Us Parts.

It was an Afghan. Now. If you want to see something controversial, if you've never, ever seen any kind of racial.

It wasn't just right. It was everything. It was the Afghan.

It hated everybody. Everything, you know, his character is hated everybody. And in a show, his the original show, his daughter and his.

Son-in-law, I think they were married and his wife made fun of Afghan for his views. And he'd go on and on and on and on. And they'd basically they'd stir him up and trigger him by saying something.

They call you going on about gay people, but not using the gay gay word. The word that I know people still use derogatory words for gay people. Even now, it's amazing.

It's like. There's a whole generation that once they're gone, that'll be gone. I mean, there's some people keep keep it going because, you know, their parents use that language.

And even when someone's in their 50s, they might still use it because their parents do. Now, that generation, like my dad's sort of generation, they're they're, you know, they're dying out over time. And then my generation in the 50s, we're dying out.

So in four years time, the generation of. Who inherited. Race, speech, homophobic speech, even if they weren't that way, they still had they inherited they were alive when it was normal, when it was just standard practice to be like that.

They'll all be gone. It'll be a very different world. It'll be a different, different country by then.

I'm not sure what it will be like. Because I will look at the younger generation now. That's a good idea.

But see, that is a little bit worrying because of the the weakness of the some of the people that I hear about. In a sense of being able to be offended at everything. How are you going to survive? How are they going to survive through life? If you're offended by everything, if everything offends you, you're not going to get you're going to have a lot of problems, a lot of mental health issues as well.

Because if you're constantly feeling offended and upset and stressed and tense over things you hear and see, you're not going to be happier in life. So a bit of kind of acceptance. You don't have to agree with someone just to don't have to agree with someone's knobhead behavior in order to just accept that they're a knobhead.

That's what they do. That's what they say. Nothing you do or say is going to make any difference to what they think.

Because the more outlandish someone's opinion is or belief system is, the more it sticks to them, the harder it is for them to get rid of it. I say harder it is because they don't try and get rid of it because they want to keep it. Because that's what they believe is them.

Even though it's not them. It's just something that they've learned. So there.

Yeah. Oh, okay. Fair enough.

So I don't know. Strange old world. It's a strange, strange, strange world that we live in.

Right. I'm talking about I want to talk about cruises. Cheap cruises.

Yes. How do you spell cruises? C-R-U-S-E-S I-S-E-S Cheap singles. Fantastic cruises for singles.

I glue cruise. I-L-G-U cruise.com Just have a look. Stupid.

These pop-ups. Except the cookies. Do you accept the cookies? Honestly, I should be absolutely huge.

All these cookies I keep getting given. Shut it. Go away.

Italy and Greek isles from Rome. Seven nights. £3,988 You really are taking.

No, sorry. Seven nights. Four grand.

That's perfect. That's pounds. That is in dollars.

That would be $80,000 or something. Wow. For Italy.

Who pay four grand to go to Italy? Just for seven days. You know, it's like, no, I'm sure it's lovely. But for about this one.

Grand Canada. Greenland and Iceland from Tilbury. Okay.

Now I was about to say. The same thing. This is £5,669.

However. Going somewhere like that. Grand Canada.

Greenland and Iceland. That could be a trip of a lifetime. You know.

It's 34 nights. So. That's something that you may never.

You might only get to do once in your life. You get to see three different countries. You're sleeping over 34 nights.

For £5,669. Now. Okay, it's a lot of money.

But for a whole month away. Trip of a lifetime. Three countries.

You know what? I'd say that's probably. It might be a good deal. Slightly out of my budget.

If I'm honest. But. Oh, this is more like it.

Treasures of the Mediterranean from Egypt. From Majorca. Itinerary.

This is £1,470. Pounds for seven nights. That's more like it.

Seven nights. You'd expect to spend a grand at least. Wouldn't you? For a week holiday.

If you weren't in a tent. You know. If you're actually going somewhere nice.

So I'm thinking. Treasures of Mediterranean from Majorca. Fly from the UK.

No, I don't want to fly anywhere. I don't want to fly anywhere. The whole point of cruises is you don't fly.

Surely. Cruise departs from Parma. Majorca.

To. Cagliari. Sardinia.

Then to Capri. Naples. Then to Rome.

City. Vercecchia. Then to.

Adjacio. Corsica. Then Palomar.

Palamas. Then Palomar. Majorca.

Fly to. Then fly to the UK. So that's seven days.

And there's another one here. It looks. Arctic voyage.

To Greenland. And Iceland. From from Tilbury.

Cruise departs from London. Tilbury. And then goes.

See this. This is what I like. No flying.

Cruise departs from London. Tilbury. To.

Reykjavik. Then from there to. Krakatok.

Then to. Nasirat. Saruak.

Then to. Sissimiut. Then to.

Lululesa. Sat. Lassasat.

Overnight on board. Overnight on board. I want to be on board the whole time.

Newark. Kirkwall. Orkney Islands and then from there to London Tillsbury or Tilbury so that's that's a good old trip to me and you're going to Greenland and Iceland okay it's expensive it's 3,779 but 21 nights I like it a lot I just like I like this setup.

Oh my baby I don't believe you've ever known me quite like me. So I'm kind of wasting my time a little bit looking at these because come on five grand. Baltic Treasures and St. Petersburg from Tilbury with Kirkuk at sea.

14 nights. Nah. Transatlantic and Caribbean from Southampton and that looks interesting.

No plane. Cruise departs from Southampton to New York and then Phillisburg, St. Martin, Rosia, Bridgetown, Barbados, Kastries, St. Lucia, I dated a girl from Lucia, from St. Lucia, Bazza Terry, St. Kitts, Charlotte Amelia, St. Thomas, then back to New York and then to Southampton. Now I'm hoping Southampton to New York is a ferry and not a flight because I will lose my mind if there's a flight.

Seriously I cannot stand planes. From the looks of it cruise departs from Southampton at sea so that's day one. Day two to seven.

Blimey. You're at sea for a whole week to get to New York. Blimey.

You can get there in two hours on a plane. Why wouldn't you, why would you, you see why people perhaps go on a plane. It might be a little bit more than two hours I think but it's still quite easy to get to New York now by plane at sea.

So you're not, blimey, you're in New York for one day but you wouldn't need more than that would you really if it's, well actually yeah I wouldn't need more than that really. If I'm going to America I don't want to go just for one day. I want to go and, I don't know, say hello to everyone.

Stay maybe. It's got to be better than here. It's got to be better than here.

And then to St. Petersburg, Smarton, Rosia, Bridgetown, Barbados. Day 50, 16. Wow.

There's quite a few days there and then okay at sea 18 to 20 and you get to New York. So I'm wondering if you spend the whole day in New York or not. It's talking about New York so I'm guessing.

It says in here December 23rd to the 3rd of December 22. December 23rd to the 3rd of December. That's not 21 days.

23rd to the 3rd New York. There are simply too many places to mention when it comes to the Big Apple but highlights have to be the Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building, Central Park, Times Square, Brookline Bridge, the Natural History Museum and the Met Art Museum. Not to mention all the cool sights of downtown Brookline, swanky Manhattan and the classic skyline from Hrode Island.

New York is a bucket list destination that just cannot be missed. The problem with internet is you can't ask questions and it's like well yeah there's probably a you know question and answer section or frequent asked questions and blah blah. Yeah but you know when you're in a if you go to travel agents you can bombard them can't you? Question after question after question after question after question.

Bombard them. You can't do that online because you know one question or get an answer and that will trigger you like oh wait a minute there's another question I've got. So that would be cool to go to the Empire State Building.

I don't know if you get a chance to spend the whole day there or not because that's two whole days. One on day 8 and one on day 21. Oh yeah I have to be double double vaccined which I am so that's good.

So I don't know. Before you travel you'll need to complete a health declaration which will be reviewed at embarkation. For sailing from 13th of October to the 31st of December all guests aged 18 and over will also need to provide proof of your double vasectomy.

Vaccination status all guests age 5 to 17 and under without proof. I have trouble with the word vaccination which is weird considering all we've been hearing about for the last two years. But I have trouble with that word reading it will require a negative PCR test 120 hours before travel.

Okay so not people that have been vaccinated won't. Okay at the cruise terminal guests will require a flat water before boarding. Blimey.

I hate all this. It winds me up it does. You know especially when you pay loads of money.

Just leave me alone. Show me where the buffet is so I can cough all over it. Leave me alone.

So I imagine that'd be quite nice. Due to industry procedures Cunard will no longer be able to accept guests on board who need supplementary oxygen. Wow.

So I guess they used to then. That seems a bit I mean. Sleep apnea machines are there.

I've got sleep apnea. I don't I don't use a machine. Guests who have had a case of septic decay maybe they're using keeping all that oxygen supply for emergencies maybe.

I don't know. Who needs supplementary oxygen. That doesn't seem fair because if someone's has an issue and their oxygen runs out.

So you're saying anyone that's got an issue they're not allowed to travel anymore because they've got I don't know COPD or something and they don't need it in an emergency if theirs run out or I don't know fell off fell overboard or something like that. I don't know why that's funny. You know it's just it'd be that's a problem.

You need to read the small print for this stuff but it takes away the fun from it. So let's go back to other cheaper ones. I wonder if it's got any results.

Blimey I'm saying low to high. Wow £129 per person. Now this has got to be good.

Cruise departs from Tilbury overnight on board. To where? Festive event at London Tilbury. Well it doesn't go anywhere.

It's just there. Festive event at London Tilbury. Another one.

Doesn't go anywhere. There's a lot. Short break from Southampton to Hamburg.

Two nights £399. It says here sold for £199 as a cruise only. Well yeah.

Why? Does that mean that oh it's a cruise only so you don't get ah got you. So they'd sell that as a cruise but you wouldn't get to stay overnight. Flights not included.

Two nights. That's a weird one. Add a flight.

I don't want a flight unless they're not coming back. You know what I think it's that they just take you one way but they don't they don't bring you back. That's a weird one.

View details. Yeah okay got it. Cruise departs from Southampton.

That's day one. Day two at sea. Day three in Hamburg and day oh day three again fly to the UK.

No I want to be on the ferry the whole time. Not I mean excursions and stuff and getting on you know but I mean traveling there and back by boat. To me I guess that's what all of the short breaks are.

That's why it's short because you come back by plane. Festive market getaway from Tilbury to Antwerp. London to Antwerp overnight on board then to London back to London.

Three nights £509. Hamburg to Southampton. Fly from the UK.

No no no no no. Okay Southampton to Hamburg. No fly to UK.

No stop with the flying. It annoys me. Why? If they're cruises they're cruises.

No flying. No flying involved. No.

The only reason flying should be involved is if people want to fly I guess other than that. Flights not included but doesn't mean you don't. Sail date.

Most popular. Italy and Greece islands from Rome. Notice how they say most popular is expensive ones.

They're lying. They're lying. Most popular.

Notice how they were put least popular. Sail date. Sail date.

October. Italy and Turkey. Italy and Turkey.

I'd like a Christmas break somewhere. Maybe um what country is it? Not Sweden. Denmark I think.

Denmark during Christmas. Somewhere snowy. That's what I'd like.

I'd like to go somewhere snowy over Christmas. Let's have a look. 2nd of December.

Northern Lights classic round voyage. That's the 2nd of December for just for 11 nights. Now that would be brilliant but there's a flight so no flights.

I'm not going to do flights. I don't care what you think. Judge me all you like.

I ain't doing flights. You stick the flights in your ear. No fly cruise.

That's what I'm after. A no fly cruise. Canary Islands chorus from Southampton.

Guys buy nearly five grand. 13 nights. No flight cruise.

How can I put that in to say that I want a no flight cruise. No flight cruise. Wow.

Fly cruises on here. 1758 different cruises. Fly cruises.

You know so you fly part of the journey. No fly cruises. 105.

Wow. Oh my goodness. You wouldn't believe what I just found there.

Jewels of the Eastern Mediterranean from Southampton. Yeah. 24 nights.

9,948 pounds. 9,948 pounds. 9,948 pounds.

Wow. That's huge. Wow.

These are the ones without flights. Wow. There's a couple that are like cheaper.

Canary Islands and Madeira from Southampton. 2,199 for 12 nights. Now that's nearly two weeks.

I just said a grand for a week is what I'd expect. Kind of that's not too not too awful and you get to go to quite a few different places. Funchal.

Madeira. Santa Cruz de la Palma. La Palma.

Las Palmas. Gran Canaria. Arequipa.

Lanzarote. Lisbon to Southampton. So I guess it's quite a lot of excursions and stuff.

You can get to visit places. No fly Northern Lights. See that would be cool.

You go to Norway to Northern Lights and stuff. 14 nights but it's 6,107 pounds. A Caribbean Christmas from Southampton.

30 nights. Now again you'd have to be very wealthy to do this one. I'd say pretty much or you've saved up and it's again another trip of a lifetime.

Something you've always wanted to do because if it's something you always wanted to do then it is worth the money no matter what the money is. This is 12,940. It's the most expensive one so far I think.

A Caribbean Christmas from Southampton. 30 nights. So you're getting a whole month for that.

6th of December 2000. Yeah. Cruise.

No fly cruise. Cruise departs from Southampton to Funchal, Madeira, St John's, Antigua, Roadtown, Tortola, Basseterre, St Kitts, Fort de France, Port Elizabeth, St Andrews bla bla bla. So I personally wouldn't want to go to the Caribbean at Christmas.

Just I don't know something about the idea of being somewhere nice at Christmas. It seems almost wrong. It seems like it's against my culture to be somewhere sunny and warm which I'm guessing it is.

I'd rather go somewhere where it was snowing. That would be more my kind of Christmas holiday ideal. I'm not sure if I ever would like to go to to the Caribbean.

I don't know. I wouldn't. I wouldn't.

Very hot. I don't know. I'm not big on heat.

Yeah. Classic Canaries from Southampton. 15 nights.

4 grand. Wow. No.

The Glorious Canary Islands from Southampton. 15 nights. 6, 7,000.

Blimey. Oh there's one even more expensive. 15 grand.

No fly Northern Nights and Fajords expedition from Dover. 14 nights for 15 grand. That's only 7 and a half grand a week per person.

Oh yeah per person. I should have mentioned that as well shouldn't I? Per person. Blimey.

It's almost wrong isn't it? Almost wrong. It's more than almost wrong. It's just not really doable.

It's a little bit out of my range. Slightly. Slightly out of my range.

Out of my financial range by about 100%. Other than that I think I'll book it. Oh.

Wow. Maybe I'll just go to Thailand like I've been talking about. Maybe that's the thing I need to do.

It's cheap. Beautiful beaches. Nice weather.

Yeah. It might suit me better doing something like that. It might.

I don't know. Okay. What's the time now? It's nearly 12 o'clock.

Blimey. It's time for me to go and to put this onto the internet. Otherwise.

So far there is still another hour and a half to go. 21 and a half thousand downloads today. Ah still got some stats in when you weren't expecting it.

I'm going to go. Thanks for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy.

Lots of love and I'll speak to you tomorrow. Yes. Bye bye.