#584 Let me bore you to sleep

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com just take these headphones off my name is Jason Newland um this is a let me bore you to sleep please on this one you can just feel the okay so i was just sat there slowly i'm generally such a quick talker i had to slow myself down only listen you ready yet only listen when you can safely close your eyes now the ironic thing about that sentence is is anyone listening to this gen okay i should be excuse me general anyone okay i won't say it yeah this this this recording is not aimed at

someone that doesn't understand that sentence but it's a choice obviously you know but i don't know i had a message sent someone telling me that they they listen when they're driving and uh it's it's supposed to be a sleepy recording and the idea that people listen when they're driving to keep themselves awake it's like oh i'm doing something wrong and i wouldn't be the first time that i've done something wrong had a message from lachromiora um someone that i used to know many many years ago she she said happy new year happy new because i

sent her a happy new year message on the 31st of december you know the correct time generally to send such a message 22 days later later so okay not mouth not much else happening at the moment had someone forget his name moaning about the adverts or again every every week or two he sends those his adverts are still there adverts are still there and i sent a message i put a message on facebook saying you're now banned from listening to my podcasts you know why are you listening to them if you're moaning about them go

somewhere else there's loads of podcasts out there probably most of them are probably better than mine not really obviously but you know no one you're not going to get me anywhere else but that's not necessarily a good thing or it's not a bad thing so yeah one of those so you know i i i value my listeners and i value that people listen take the time to listen and benefit hopefully from what i do but you know what life is too damn short to be wasting it doing something you don't want to do you don't

enjoy doing intentionally you know because no one has to listen to a podcast or watch a youtube video or even watch a television program no one has to do that it's probably someone someone in bed now next to their partner who's listening to me to get to sleep yeah you want to bet mate i have to listen to your stupid squeaky voice every single bloody night because my partner loves listening to you and she falls asleep but she falls asleep 10 minutes in i have to listen to the other 49 minutes of absolute rubbish that

you come out with so yeah i do have to listen to it well i haven't thought about that until just this moment well tough i don't care i can't i'm not responsible for your relationship i can't be held responsible for that i don't take i don't even take responsibility for my own relationships so i'm not going to start taking responsibility for others as well am i no no i mean if you are like feeling that you're being forced to listen to my annoying squeaky voice then maybe maybe get some earplugs i used to wear earplugs

for years just if you do wear earplugs see i care about you i'm giving you some good advice here as an expert of earplug wearing and having spent years and years and years of my life wearing earplugs i don't don't do it anymore i would just give you a bit of advice don't push them in too hard okay don't push them in too hard two reasons firstly there's a chance your earwax will get impacted or compacted whatever the word is secondly there's a chance it will go too far what happened to me is i ended

up with a perforated eardrum um one day i pulled it out and half my brain came out in my left ear so well i didn't really but you know it was bleeding and i thought oh didn't realize what damage i'd done until i stand up and fell over so it was uh didn't you know what before that happened i didn't really believe that balance uh the years affected balance didn't you know i'd heard it i'd read about it and somewhere you know school documentaries whatever i'd heard it didn't really believe it um i've never i

mean i've never ever been damaged whether in a fight or in a fall or anything in my memory that's affected my balance or you know had that effect on me the only thing that's ever had that effect is being really really drunk you know spinning a room and stuff um but that was only when i lied down i didn't have that effect when i was standing up now this a perforated eardrum had no effect on me when i was lying down or sitting down it was the standing up and looking up as well it's like

oh very very very strange indeed very very unusual situation and um my doctor because i went to the doctor for it because i was i mean this was an instantly life-changing experience i had no idea what to do about it and if it was what it was but you know if you wake up and everything's spinning you do not carry on like normal you get seek medical attention straight away you know it's again it sounds like something that doesn't need to be said but probably does you know i know people and i'm still amazed to

this day how some people won't they're scared to phone the police or for an ambulance you know for themselves fair enough i guess but for someone else you know don't hesitate but then you could say yeah but you don't understand jay-jay uh i live in america and an ambulance costs about five thousand dollars to call out you get a bill for about five grand if you call an ambulance out i said what is that true no that's because we don't pay anything here we do but we don't you know sort of indirectly taxes and that

you know all that stuff pays towards it but we don't um national insurance and stuff or whatever else people pay out but let me just check cost okay what i'll do i'll do it cost of calling an ambulance in america i was wrong ah i was wrong so it says here oh no this is 2013 insane let's have a look so you get oh this says here it's not right i mean they don't ambulances come out you haven't got paid from them before but from the taxes we fund service of those who need them one

of these services is the ambulance service if you need an ambulance no matter who calls that you get one and no bill sorry see it's saying see again it's saying different things one saying it's free one saying they pay what happens if you don't pay an ambulance bill so another one is saying from the equipment costs and the ambulance bills can exceed one thousand dollars and occasionally even reach two thousand this is december 2020 so someone said online it was five grand it's like that was a person just now in my head five grand's a

lot like in the old days yeah people might not realize this but they used to cost us ambulances um cost of ambulance in uk 80s because my brother broke his arm and he said that it cost something like 150 pound and this was about 1984 85 time and he fell off his motorbike and for me to get that information it's going to be weird because it's not been that way since i've been an adult did did nhs ever charge for ambulance ambulance call out yeah so that's weird isn't it can you get charged calling for

an ambulance so it says new research shows that one trip in an ambulance would cost 419 pound not not for this for the nhs not for the person that's how much it cost then another website says it's 252 pound wow so there you go that was boring that was pointless it wasn't just boring it was pointless yet i found mildly interesting at the same time it was a bit like being on a date with someone isn't it first date that's very boring but at the same time mildly interesting to know what's going to happen next

of course not boring why would it be boring with me imagine meeting me and being disappointed because i'm boring we thought it was an act we thought you were just pretending to be boring you really are boring well it's hard to be interesting really when you never do anything and i never do anything really today i've been out for a walk twice been out for a walk twice oh and i made a phone call to my friend to ask to borrow 60 pound because just bills and everything just got out the what's it the podcast

bill went out on wednesday it's friday now so i borrowed money off her to help pay for that and then other bills went out and had a food food delivery and that left me with 30 pound okay that was it cash that in it's taken me 50 years to 50 years and four months to build up the amount of 30 pound so i've got that i drew it out of my bank or out of the cash point machine so that no one else can take money out of my out of my account and my friend

phoned me up yesterday and said have you got any got any money you can lend me and i said well when we can you pay it back he said friday okay okay so i lend him 30 pound thinking i'm getting it back friday it's only a couple of days and i realized it's thursday not wednesday this is yesterday it's friday now and i thought oh oh whoops have i no i did say friday he said friday but which friday because he he thinks a little bit differently so i called him up later on a few

hours later i said when you said friday you're talking about tomorrow yeah he said no next friday i said oh i thought you meant like the next friday coming up which would be tomorrow although admittedly i thought it was wednesday so a couple of days away but he said no no next friday so when he told you know even though friday hasn't even come yet he's talking about the following friday and he says i'll pay you back friday if i borrow money off you and it's thursday pay you back friday it means tomorrow but it's

just you know i mean it's it's a different um way of thinking i suppose just think he was thinking perhaps in his mind it was already friday i was thinking it was wednesday and he probably might be he thought it was friday anyway that's that left me with actually i did have i think four pound in change in my coat so you know i thought i was on the internet looking for holidays and cruises you know how you do i went to bed and i've got i've got food and stuff but the next bit of

money i get will be hope well all going properly it should be the 31st of this month it says now 22nd so it's what nine days away and i started thinking uh well i haven't got enough food for andre to get me through to that he has two packets a day there are i think eight or nine packets left of his food maybe 10 so i could probably get through five days but not nine and other other things that i need to get you know uh so i've and i thought to myself you know what

this will put a strain on my friendship because it doesn't matter now in a sense but as the days go by like tomorrow sunday you know days when i need to go to the shop and get a few bits and because you know some things i get daily or every other couple of days it's all about the fresh food and stuff i'll start to be resentful i'll start to be gradually turning into the hulk very gradually starting with my toes first always my toes for some reason and start getting an angry mouth a quiver on

my lips and so i'll phone my friend up again and this is a different friend who lent me the 90 pound so i already got 90 pounds which is 120 dollars which is how much i needed for the uh podcast so i said to her look can you lend me can i because i borrowed that on tuesday in preparing for wednesday morning when it got took out and then i just said can i borrow i said i'll even pay you interest if you want i just this is this is just a weird situation i didn't

go she was busy so i didn't go into details of this 30 pound but i was a little bit embarrassed for myself because i messed up myself on that one and because i you know if i've got 30 pound and you're giving it back to me tomorrow what does it matter i don't need it today if i don't need it today that is this is yesterday and there wasn't going out wasn't doing anything but then you know add a week onto it that's a different situation so i'm just going to have to be a little

bit clearer with my communication regarding such situations like that and my friend said yeah so she lent me another 60 pound to get me through so that's uh so i owe 150 so i'll be paying that off when i get it at the end of the month so that took the pressure off i just i just felt so relieved just to be able to i mean yeah it's sort of six pound a day to sort of get by so which is okay i've got i've got enough food well even some of the like the the

fresh stuff is starting to be worn out you know so it's not worn out but it's not going to last till the end of the month you know the bread and some of the other stuff so caviar it's not it's not as good when it's frozen not as good not as good as it's when it's frozen or when it's mixed with pickle i've never had caviar i don't think never never have i had caviar i might do what that was a bit high wouldn't i might do one day i might do one day i don't

know so i'm not i mean it's basically fish spunk in it i mean isn't it or or fish ovaries or or it's like like lobster period or something i don't know isn't it's not it's not like nice is it it's not like the the concept of it lobster period i just that's why it's so red i i don't know it's it's isn't it it's eggs isn't it or something or is it actually is it like the afterbirth of a of a cod or something i don't know just what i said there's put me off eating

caviar it's very expensive what's that stuff that you that people buy really expensive and it's it looks like poo and you scrape it like with a almost like a cheese grater kind of thing onto the top of food in very expensive restaurants and i would look it up but my phone's hiding from me genuinely my phone is hiding that's weird oh no it's in between my legs no wonder i didn't notice i'm numb there these days i'm numb nothing going on and that's what happens when no when you get no blood circulating to the particular

area of your body the body starts to kind of die doesn't it i mean it does literally you have to have the blood circulation move into the different parts of your body every day now i learned that years ago it was in a textbook but nowhere in a textbook did it say that you shouldn't be in a public place when you are stimulating that area for the blood to accumulate for healing if you knew what it was like being me you wouldn't want to be me you'd be something else not me um really expensive food

not cockles really expensive poo it's not really poo food truffles i mean it is literally that it's this is eight of the world's most expensive foods okay now i'll talk about this because as you know i live a very high class escort no high class lifestyle so part of my part of my agenda with making these recordings is not just to bore you to sleep and say silly things and talk about my boring life i like to educate i'd like to pass on the kind of lifestyle that i live to those less fortunate that don't

get to eat in the Ritz and the Savoy and you know don't have butlers to clean their toenails you know things like that i mean i'm just lucky that i've got that but not everyone does is this a good time to ask for help please send me a paypal gift probably passed that haven't we no if you start talking about having a butler cleaning your toenails and eating caviar probably not going to get that many people can you imagine if people did really take me seriously i can't believe he eats caviar i can't realize he's

rich he's not like us at all like i ever was eight of the world's most expensive foods saffron i thought saffron was a material no saffron is if your rice is luminous yellow or is saffron a color i'll just read it if your rice is luminous yellow then the chances are it's been sharing a saucepan with saffron oh come on that's not giving me enough information oh blimey okay and it's been oh i know what saffron is isn't it like gold um it's actually got proper gold in it but you can eat it um the

spice oh it's a spice nicknamed red gold is the vivid crimson stigma or threads from a crocus flower and it's used as a coloring agent in food why does something so small cost so much the reasons are simple saffron crocuses only flower for a week or two a year in the autumn harvesting the spice is labor intensive it's collected and processed by hand and each small flower has only three stigma which means it takes around two football pitches of crocuses to create a kilogram of saffron that's as many as three thousand flowers um where does

it grow doesn't say where it grows now if it grows in if it grew in england then based on the minimum wage of eight pound whatever it is it's cost a huge amount of money to collect that stuff but if it's in a country where people literally you know slave labor where they're getting paid maybe four pound a day or less which is often the case with some stuff like that i never understood it really you know what it's like with the gold mines and the diamond mines how can you own the insides of the

planet in another country it basically is like little bums aren't they like little anuses and like i like i own that anus now because it produces coal or it produces you know gold or silver or whatever it is silver plating or you know diamonds well no how can you how can someone else and then pay the people that live in that country and live in that area pay them let's let's work out how much they get paid i'm interested now how much do diamond mined workers get paid of course it's going to vary isn't it

but and despite employing the least workers across these four major sectors diamond miners on average are the highest paid or two right it should be diamonds says that's expensive isn't it earning just under r24 000 a month this is followed by platinum platinum platinum platinum platinum miners coal miners and then gold miners wow so gold miners is the lowest and are all close together between r22 200 and r22 800 um r22 i don't know what that is i want to find out how much that is in uk because it sounds a lot 22 000 or

24 000 you know what i mean let's have a look oh come on i know how to do it if only it's za south african rand so i've actually got a money converter currency converter here so za that's good easy to find said said by you by the way it's said it's not it's not z said said um no no no no no real one za za to let's do it in us s u s e u u s t u um i can see you're excited about this united states dollar so what did we

say 24 000 24 is that right that's that's a good payment blimey here's me saying they don't get paid much money they get paid loads of money okay 24 000 raw is 1179 dollars yeah it's not a lot of money 1179 dollars okay 1179 dollars a month um so averaging so if i times that by 12 blimey it's less than 15 grand a year 14 000 pound 148 it's more than i was thinking but then if you consider for that for that money yeah they've only got to find one one diamond a year like a

decent sort of kind of size diamond a year and that'll probably pay their wages for the rest of their life perhaps you know a big dime but like it's not gonna take that they've got to find a lot to pay their wages if they cover their costs 1179 divide that by four eight 160 hours that's the average here 40 hours divide it by 160 what four eight oh no four weeks isn't it four weeks so they're they're on less than minimum wage crazy so the job is hard harder than i'll ever be able to really

imagine it's underground dirty dangerous and all that stuff but what they find is worth a fortune absolutely worth a huge amounts of money because let's face it if they didn't find diamonds they would close so they must be finding that was a weird noise isn't it they must be finding diamonds and yeah i wonder how much how much i need to find this out now what's the average how much how much do diamond why are you talking about diamond mines for i don't know really diamond mines i want to know how much they find how

much do diamond mines burn burn diamond miners no not miners not miners wow look at this diamond miners who work in small scale mining panning or digging for diamonds produce about 15 percent of the world's diamonds but their wages do not reflect the value of their work which is what i was saying an estimated 1 million diamond diggers in africa earn less than a dollar a day see you see with the internet see that that's the thing and this is um this is an article on diamond mining child labor i mean children should get paid

less shouldn't they don't have mortgages you know and got cars not allowed to drive but then there's that saying they get a place less than a dollar a day yeah which is it's 30 days a month it shouldn't work 30 days should they so let's say but let's say $30 a month but now this one's saying that they earn probably $1,500 a month bit of difference in there i mean there's one it's a mining group total employed 18,227 million total total paid 5.

2 billion are average annual what it's saying the average annual salary is 285,290 average monthly 23 yes i guess is so it's about 14 1400 a month kind of you know so i'm not interested in there and i want to know how much the largest mining company De Beers Group biggest mining company in the world possessing 35% of global rough diamond production furthermore Drenning is an open pit mine and in use since 1982 the annual production it lies around 12 million carats 12 million carats i mean i thought they were looking for diamonds but couldn't

find any diamonds but look at this it's quite shiny you can see in dark because if you was a miner would you need to eat carrots for your eyesight because i don't know if it's true if it was true that the carrots improve your eyesight then wouldn't opticians just be prescribing carrots to people instead of glasses who owns the biggest diamond mine in the world Debswana diamond city again it's like make your mind up the internet contradicts yourself continuously unlike me see i try and fact check and when i fact check i still get information

that's and it's not the same it says here De Beers Group the biggest mining company in the world it says here under who's the biggest diamond mine in the world diamond mine diamond company maybe it's a different thing this Debswana diamond company owned by Debswana diamond company okay a 50 50 partnership between De Beers Group oh yeah a part of Anglo-American group and the government of Botswana Drenning is considered to be the world's richest diamond mine in terms of value which means simple very simple question okay Botswana has transformed itself from one of the poorest

countries in the world to an um upper middle income country GDP per capita grew from three thousand one thousand three hundred forty four in 1950 to 15 000 this is dollars 15 000 i don't know what it means i don't know what i don't know what i'm reading i'm just reading it out it sounds good though doesn't it in 50 to 15 000 and 15 dollars 2016 um oh this is interesting again it might be contradictory but it says Botswana it has unstable agricultural conditions in a country where nearly half 48.

5 percent of land is for agricultural use contribute to poverty another major reason is okay other stuff let's see who was Botswana colonized by aha a bit of pride bit of a pride moment here oh yes British yep we made such a positive such a positive uh effect on the world and wait a minute well we didn't sure some of it was positive before its independence in 1966 Botswana was a British protectorate known as Betunaland it was also one of the poorest and least developed states in the world the country is named after its dominant

ethnic group that's this Swana Botswana okay in older variant orthography i have no idea so basically we from the looks of it the Anglo this is interesting isn't it so the biggest diamond company is in Botswana biggest diamond company in the world is in Botswana owned 50 50 by the government and um De Beers it's part of an Anglo-American group what's uh well that's in it's kind of European isn't it or English let's have a look blimey De Beers i put in De Beers yeah into the into google and it's it's come up Debeers.

co.

uk De Beers official site browse and order online discover the beauty discover the beauty and light of De Beers natural diamonds explore timeless jewelry ethical nature diamonds are individual hand chosen with unrivaled expertise natural beauty diamond mastery and social website Anglo-American see again it's it's Anglo-American owns 80 85 percent of De Beers so the biggest diamond mine in the world that's in Botswana is owned by De Beers 50 percent by De Beers 50 percent by the Botswana government and Anglo-American owns 85 percent of De Beers and now is saying Anglo-American owns 85 percent of De

Beers group the world's leading diamond group the remaining 15 percent is owned by the government of the Republic of Botswana and it produces one third of the world's rough diamonds and now is Anglo-American.com they've got their own website Anglo-American diamonds discover more about diamonds wow but they're bragging about it on here Anglo-American owns 85 percent of De Beers group the world's leading diamond company oh wow wow Bruce Cleaver CEO of De Beers I want to see total number of countries they work in 15 56 different sites 90 000 employees wow is this a real mining

real people real difference investor calendar what it says here annual results annual results 2020 okay now it's a production report says there's production interim results let's have a look I just want to

know how much they make out of another company another country interesting is it wonder where it's based where's Anglo-American American based why do we care I don't know why I care I just seem to care now it's almost like it's the only thing I care about in the whole world isn't it weird investors annual reporting quarterly production reports reports library integrated annual report okay let's have a look at this so well group performance this is for I think this is for last year okay I think it might not be it might but anyway okay 29.

9 billion this is 2019 2018 27. 6 billion dollars that's the revenue profitable equitable to equity shareholders so this would be the amount that's paid out to the shareholders 3. 5 billion underlying earnings per share is 2.

75 cents this has gone up by 20 20 cents since the year before so I don't know enough about business to understand a lot of this oh total dividends per share so for every share this is the amount of money you get so um so you already own a share so you paid whatever you paid for it so one dollar nine cents per share that's a dividends so if you've got a thousand shares or a million shares you know if you're like a millionaire wow if you've got a thousand shares that's a thousand dollars it's quite easy to work out isn't it because one so someone has got a million shares and their million shares are worth 2.

75 million yeah and you think well okay it's worth 2. 75 million because that's the amount per share that's how much it's worth now was worth maybe they bought it for 56 cent or maybe it was more you know maybe it was three three million it might be worth but it's it's worth if you've got a million shares it's 2. 75 million dollars worth of shares you got they're not going anywhere they've gone up in value so by 20 cents American US cents so that's 20 oh no okay it's easy if it's gone up by a dollar that'd be a million dollars wouldn't it like the value of your stock would be a million dollars increased so it'd be three dollars 75 3.

75 dollars but it's not a bit so let's take that off a five so a million so it's two hundred thousand so yes if you've got a million dollars your 2. 75 your 2. 75 million dollars worth of stock would go up in value 200 grand over the last year and then you also got a over 1 million dollar dividend for your shares so basically you've made 12 1. 2 million dollars you've only got to do that two years in a row and your shares are paid for wow so if i if i'd have bought if i bought a million shares in that company last year in 2018 when they were 2.

55 cents each i bought a million two so that'd be 2. 5 to 2 million 550,000 whatever now they'd be worth 2 million 750,000 dollars so gone up 200 grand i mean that's to earn 200 grand it's not a bad amount earned is it just on its own just from that so technically you could sell 200 grand's worth of shares and still have the same value as you did last year i don't know anyway i'm getting a 1. 1 million because each share is worth a dollar for dividends so that's how much each share so someone's got 10 shares and they got 22.

75 cents worth of shares they'd get ten dollars and that's gone up nine cents so pretty much 10 percent since last year so it was one dollar per share which means based on that maybe next year because i can't see how far back it goes but maybe next year it's going to be one dollar 20 cents so all i'm asking for is a million dollars to invest okay you don't all have to give me a million altogether right i'll invest it in this by a million dollars worth of investment and based on this i'll have

one million two hundred thousand back the following year okay which means for each person i could give them their money back so let's say i'm trying to work it out so let's say i got 10 people give me a okay okay 10 10 10 10 um well i'd share it out that's what i mean so i could give you the million i'll give you your money back the following year and then the extra i could sell the money there sell a an amount of it and then well i don't know if yeah so if a

million people gave me well actually it's not i need to 2.

75 so i need basically 3 million to get through i need 2 million 750 grand that's all so if you send 2 million 750 thousand dollars a million people do that i'll give you one pound nine cents next year i'll give you and you'll get your money back um yeah it's not working okay if you give me 2 million 750 grand all being well okay i will give you back i will give you the money back within three years or i can give you the money back in 10 years and pay you a dividend and give you 50 percent of my dividend which means you give me 2.

75 million so this year based on the stats next year i'll give you 500 grand and the following year i'll give you 500 grand and the following year i'll give you 500 grand and we keep doing that for as long as you want but i never have to pay it back so it's a gamble you give me the 2. 7 million give it to me don't lend it to me give it to me and i will give you 50 percent of my total dividends every year how about that i might have got this all wrong it might not be correct my understanding but i think it is it might not be it doesn't matter really but you think well yeah that's 2.

75 i don't half a million and don't come nowhere near i don't know but in four years time i'll have paid you 2 million yeah that's not close is it okay in six years time you'll have had three million which is more it's 250 grand more than what you gave me yeah but it's but what about the seventh year half a million in fact by then it would have gone up so you might be getting 600 grand 700 grand so your money's paid off you've invested wow do you think that's what people do i don't

know enough about investing do you think people pay they invest other other people's money into their own shares buy their own shares with that person's money and then pay a dividend out of their own dividend to that person yeah now getting back to the the real conversation oh look i've got a clear a block left the following five-star message capacitor yep that was really worth your time wasn't it capacitor that was it um no what i wanted to do is talk about very important this conversation is i'll get rid of all that stuff caviar is

a second the world's second most expensive food caviar is the pickled roe of the sturgeon fish and considered one of the world's greatest delicacies it's tricky to handle and package but more significantly it's incredibly rare it's not that rare it's in every hotel so it's on the top top hotels you can buy it in supermarkets as far as i'm aware so therefore it can't be that rare can it the most famous caviar is from the beluga sturgeon found in the caspian and the black sea now critically endangered very little of its eggs can be sold

legally it takes up to do two decades for the beluga sturgeon to reach maturity and its adult size two decades blimey that's a long time even rarer is the roe from the albino sturgeon now almost extinct in its native environment according to the guinness world records the most expensive caviar recorded is from an aged possibly 100 years old albino beluga sturgeon whose white caviar sold for about 34,500 per kilogram and it says here my god that's steep um um so if we're going to start eating things really rare if that's what the basis of uh

eating something it's very it's expensive because it's rare therefore that's why we spend lots of money on it to eat it my voice is going again i need a drink of water then a tramp's clean underwear that'd be rare wouldn't it or a college a college student chess champion's condom that's gonna be rare what other things would be rare um things that you know these are things you can't even eat aren't they a 70 year old boy's car which hasn't been speeded in yep if you can find a car owned by a 70 year old

that hasn't been speeded and gone over the legal limit driving yeah so that's that'd be very rare wouldn't want to eat it though would you oysters now considered a luxury oysters haven't always been the food of the filthy rich in the 19th century oysters were cheap as chips and an important food source for the working classes in coastal communities a snack so plentiful that they were used to bulk out meat pies wow wow looks like snot though doesn't it let's be honest it looks like something you pick out of your nose it does it's a

mixture between that and like a a microwave baby you know it's it's like what you expect you know it's it's a kind of white truffle and this is what i was talking about earlier but i couldn't remember the name found in the piedmont region of northern italy highly esteemed white truffles will only grow amongst the roots of certain trees are much scarcer than any other type of truffle and have a particularly intense flavor and aroma in other words disgusting aroma is not usually used in a positive term is it there's a particular aroma coming from

that bin they can't be cultivated or grown they can be grown can't they grow if something's something grows then it can be grown just means you might have to i don't know i don't know everything i know most things i don't know everything though although folk yet that word that no one uses anymore although i remember i was in a buddhist center and one of the order members said hi folks no nobody uses that term anymore why are you using it folks yeah you had folks singing but no one addresses an audience with the word

folks hello folks no no i'm sorry they can't be cultivated or grown although folk have tried to generation for generations to farm the truffles they can still only be sourced in the wild it is this unpredictability along with the lengths people go to locate and harvest them which results in their hefty price tag okay the record sum paid for a single white truffle was by a mackerel casino owner stanley ho in 2007 he splashed out 300 330 000 dollars 165 000 pound for one of the largest truffles uncovered in decades weighing 1.

5 kilograms a pretty extraordinary price for a pungent underground fungus let's face it let's this let's call let's call truffles what they are tree poo the tree has a poo they can't walk to a toilet can it and if you're in a forest and if you do a poo you bury it don't it generally so the tree does it itself it buries it if you looked underneath i bet you see a piece of like a spade and you know stuff like that that uses to bury the poo the truffle i bet you i bet you

see a little bucket in the summer makes sand castles and stuff or mud castles probably that's it there are other foods but i'll talk about that another time because i can sit i can sense really sense that you're enjoying that you've really enjoyed this uh this recording i know i have because um i think it's nice to learn to learn new things you know you know i mean you get me you get me in it in it in it yes it's time to fall in love with me it's time to say goodbye to your knees

it's time to hold on tight to my way and then and then and then that's weird log in twitter had logged me out oh brilliant so yeah that's that's that's that's that's uh yeah go on done bing bong bong so that's it i'm gonna go i'm gonna wish you all the happiness in the world so remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy see lady gaga is not the only one that can sing well i also can i was watching lady gaga the other night or the other day doing the uh

the um what's that comedy show um the you know what a president president thing that was on the other day and they were making fun of it i don't know who's on but it was making fun of the the president had some well i don't know who i don't really follow american politics because i have my own country my own politicians to follow um but they they it was like a mock thing and there is this they had this um really old man on there it inducted him or whatever it's really he's like nearly 80

you know like anyone that old could ever become a president i mean he wouldn't be allowed to work in mcdonald's he's too old so i thought it was so cute the way that he looked so lovely as he was like struggling to keep his eyes open you could see was that all looking around for his mummy so he could go to bed get wrapped up it was just like oh this is lovely it's actually a little funny it was hot what harm and as well is like cute as well so i don't know what's going

on with the election i don't know who's winning it um last time i looked at the really look to see what's going on um clinton seemed to be doing quite well against bush but i don't know if if he'll get it but uh yeah as i said i'm not that into politics i keep up a little bit with the american politics but it's no more important to me than swedish politics or botswana politics or egyptian politics or you know anything like that it's just another country uh does yeah i have my own country my own

politicians um got thatcher and uh she's doing quite well i mean um she's only been in the role for a little while but she's doing quite well i think she's giving she when you give it time i reckon because it's a novelty isn't it got boobies and stuff but i reckon she's going to be very popular oh very popular um just need i mean what i thought i sent her some little scripts because she needs a few little sound bites someone said once about mine oh i listen to your sound bites no this is not

a sound bite a sound bite is like a i don't know five second three second little sound like no way you know that's a sound bite or maybe maybe like a 15 second blurb of someone like making themselves look silly that's a sound bite not an hour long recording sound bites never been so angry and what i did is i've sent old thatcher a couple of ideas which she could use if she wants i don't know she'll use them i don't know she'll use them but she might do uh for what was it something about

uh yeah well actually i sent it to her she's she said so oh she's using my thing she said and she said this woman is not for turning and i called her i said oi what maggie all right darling she said who is this i said it's jason remember remember remember yeah yeah jason does things other people won't do jason the satisfier do you remember oh yes and she's she said um i said i noticed you you did my uh use my little you know my thing she said what i said i sent you that

you know this woman is not for turning she said what i said yeah i sent that to you on a piece of paper you said you can use this she said it's not it's not what you sent i said it is she said no it's not i've got it here i'll tell you what it says surprise it said it says please don't try and move me around i don't want to be moved around i'm quite happy looking in this direction no i don't want to be moved no i'm not a man i'm a woman and

i don't want to be moved stop trying to turn me around please can i get off this pottery thing because i'm not clay i don't really work today but yeah well it's it's similar to this uh this woman is not for turning so she sent me 70 million pounds that's great yeah she i remember yeah she remembers me as the tongue the tongue the tongue the tongue hmm anyway yeah so i'm gonna go thank you for listening take care of yourselves remember to be kind to yourself and have a good weekend lots of love b-b-bye

b-b-bye bye