#565 Let me bore you to sleep

Hello and welcome. Welcome to jasonnewland.com. Yes, jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland and this is Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

I hope you're well and today is Sunday the 20th of December 2020. Yes, so we've got um 11 days left of the year. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, eleven days and one, two, three, four, well in five days time it's Christmas.

In four days time it's Christmas Eve. So yeah groovy. It's a happy, I'll just start saying happy Christmas to everybody.

And if there's anyone out there listening that doesn't celebrate Christmas or has a you know different religion and doesn't like hearing the terms, he doesn't like hearing a happy Christmas or merry Christmas, then I don't care. I don't really celebrate Christmas either but you know what, if you're in a place that predominantly celebrates Christmas then I say just go along with it. You don't have to go along with it on a religious way, you know.

See if I was, I think if I was in, I don't know, a predominantly Jewish place for example, I don't, I can't think of where that would be, Israel, Palestine or whatever, then I would celebrate Ramadan or whatever, whatever Jewish holiday is I'm trying to think. Passover? That's one isn't it? I mean every Friday is like a holiday, well not a holiday, it's a sacred day isn't it? Friday, I forget what it's called, Friday I suppose. Easter Friday, every Friday, Passover, Passover.

I can't remember, I would, I wouldn't celebrate it but I'd definitely take it off as a holiday if I was working, I'd take off anything, I would except my socks. I'd happily celebrate every single festival day that there is, if it meant having time off work. Ramadan, Eve, Diwali, Easter, Ramadan, I can't remember any of the others but there's lots, I mean you think all the different religions that there are, we've got Hindus, Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Christians, Buddhists, Taoists, what's the other ones? Hindus, Jews, what's the others? There's others isn't there?

Well actually we said Judaism, that's the correct word, not Judaism, Catholicism, Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism, very isms, lots of isms, Christianity, what's the one where they, they, Rastafarianism, it's a religion, Mormon, lots and lots in there, plus with the, well Christianity and stuff, that's broken up into about a thousand different pieces, so yeah, wow, anyway, Merry Christmas, yeah, I mean I live, it's a weird one isn't it, technically England and America are Christian countries, technically, apparently, it was built upon that wasn't it, it was built, the law, the laws of the land were built upon religion,

built, you know, the church made the laws, because the church used to, the kings and stuff used to be the head of the church didn't they, in the old days, so imagine in this country, we've had Vikings, Romans, we're being plundered by all kinds of people aren't we, over the years in England, I mean, you know, the whole thing is in America, Americans went over and, basically, the original, I mean I'm going back, you know, thousands of years or hundreds of years or whatever, and then it was the, the aboriginals, who, the original, the, the

originals that lived there, in America, but in England, the original people, the, I don't know, whatever you want to call them, the, not the heathens, what's the, the, you know, the, the original people from this land, England, were basic, basically mistreated by lots of other countries, constantly, I mean, Italy, Rome, the Romans, and we had the Norse, what do we have, Norse, we had Egyptians, possibly, we had, okay, let me just find out, so we've been evaded, invaded lots of times in this country, let me find out how many times, let me just search, how

many times has England been invaded, okay, 73 times since 1066, Britain's borders have been invaded 73 times since 1066, wow, wow, but the big ones was, it's been invaded lots of times, but the successful, really successful ones was, according to this, the Roman invasion, the Carusian revolt, whatever that is, the great heathen army, wow, the Norman conquest, Matilda and Henry's invasion, you wouldn't be scared of someone called Matilda, would you, quick hide everyone, Matilda's coming, so, there's Matilda, yeah, Matilda, I'm going to hide from someone called Matilda, am I, yeah, but she's with Henry, Henry,

that's the name of a vacuum cleaner, we'd be scared of someone called Henry, that's not even a, it's a silly name, not a silly name, is it, but Queen Matilda, Isabella and Mortimer's invasion, blimey, wow, Edward the one V's invasion, yeah, but these were, these, these were invasions within the country from different parts, the raid on Mount Space, Spain invaded Cornwall in 1595, wow, the road on the Medway, the Dutch, that was the Dutch, the glorious revolution, so that was Dutch as well, Dutch, a Dutchman would take the throne of England after being invited by

the country's own Parliament, 25,000 army, blimey, so we've been invaded a lot in the past, so, I know what it's like, that's what I'm saying, I don't know what I am, that's the thing, like people in this country who come here from another country, let's say from Brazil or, you know, they can say, well, I'm Brazilian slash British, whatever, but I don't know what the hell I am, I don't know if I go back to Rome, you know what I mean, if my ancestors was Roman or Dutch or French or, well, I do know, like,

there's French in me, but, you know, as far as like going all the way back, because of all the different invasions we had here, so, it's quite weird when people say, oh, about knowing what it's like to be English, what is English?

To be fair, it's just a mix of different cultures, not now, which it is, but, like, originally, going all the way back, like, there is no English person, I'm English, not really that you can go all the way back and say, yeah, my ancestors, I suppose, unless you do go onto a hereditary website, I suppose, but I don't know, I don't know how far back I go, my family go back to Scotland, so I've got Scottish ancestors, my, I think my mum's, what, mother was French or Romanian, one of them, she was just not English,

I think, and I think my granddad's side of the family was Scottish heritage, so I do wonder, I'd, I can see that perhaps looking at me, that there's a Roman, I've got kind of maybe Italian, Rome blood in me, so I imagine in my mind, one of my female relatives, you know, from thousands of years ago, was a very beautiful young lady who caught the, caught the heart and the eye of a Caesar, and he seized her, he seized her, and they fell in love, and then, yeah, she was a milkmaid, I don't know why,

and he was on holiday here, camping, he thought he'd visit, so yeah, wow, I never realised that, so I am, I literally kind of am royalty in a way, but not German, not like here, the German, it's German royalty, isn't it, in this country, but I'm kind of Italian royalty, I guess, wow, the amount of things we learn, that have no truth whatsoever in them, and we just accept them, it's amazing, isn't it, I've just accepted that, none of it's true, made it all up, and now I actually do believe that I am royalty, isn't

it weird, what do you mean, has this got something to do with my illness, no, it's not, what do you mean I've lost track of reality, no, look, how can you lose track of something you never had track of to start with, I've got no idea, real, what's real, I'll tell you what's real, now, right now, I'd love to do a big fart, don't say that, that's real, but of course I don't do such things, so I just did a really nice recording, a relaxation recording, for the Relaxation for Stress and Anxiety podcast, it's called

Smile Relaxation and Sleep, it's about 35 minutes long, it's two versions, one with music, one without, the one with music's about two hours long, but I think it's quite good, I've sat here recording it, as you do, it felt quite good, felt quite, I was doing more than just a relaxation session, I was doing more than just a sleep session, there was there's more to it, and that's what I like to do, I like to give more, add more than just the relaxation, and because I'm kind of now known really for the boring sleepy man,

that seems to be my, and it's my own doing really, but that's what I'm kind of best known for now, is the sleep stuff that I do, so I guess I'm trying to, what I always have done really, but looking to include more positive ideas embedded within the sleep or relaxation hypnosis recordings I do, I always say the same thing then, what I'm going to say now is, but not with this podcast, this is just me just messing about, no positivity here, no, no, no, I am, now as I was recording it, it felt nice,

it felt quite nice, oh here's something that happened yesterday, I didn't didn't mention it in my recording, I was having a little lie down in bed, having a little rest, because I was going to be up all night watching the boxing that started at one o'clock, it was in America and it was, went on till about half five, so I had a little early evening nap, about eight or nine o'clock, something like that, eight o'clock, and I got woken up by this loud Christmas music, and I thought, what on earth is going on, and the

only thing, because it's happened, I think it happened once or twice over the last few years, is Andre's pressed a remote control and turned the TV on, it's really rare, but he has done it at least once, maybe twice, where he's climbed onto the settee and he's pressed, pressed the remote control and the TV's come on, music's playing or a TV, whatever, and I might have been listening to a radio station, so that's what I'm thinking, oh the TV's come on, so I'm walking into the living room and I struggled to get in, I decided

to go through the door and so I walked through and the television's off, but I can still hear this sound, very loud music, Christmassy, sleigh bells a little man, singing a song, something like that, and I'm thinking, so I look in the bathroom, nothing coming out of the toilet or the bath, it's not coming from the fridge, what's going on, really, I was confused, I'd just woken up, you know, so I realised that there's something going on outside in the street, and it looked like from a distance, some kind of float, being pulled by a

car, so Andre's awake at this point, so I thought, I know what I'll do, I'll take Andre for a little walk and we'll go and see what it is, but by the time I get him ready, and we go out, the thing's gone, I walk up the road to try and get there, he wants to get down, so I do, the other night he wanted to get down and I didn't let him down and he went to the toilet, because he needed to go, so I thought, I'm not doing that again, I let him down

and he takes about an hour just to get to the end of the road, as he's rubbing and sniffing every single bit of dirt and grass, and I still don't know what it was really, I think it was, well it was something to do with Father Christmas, Santa Claus, Christmassy stuff, and there were people outside, and a car, it was quite dark out, and a car pulled over and turned right, so I shouted, Indicate!

Not realising there was about 16 people just standing outside their house, just staring at me, I was like, oops, it annoys me when people don't indicate, it's one of my little things, as a pedestrian, as a pedestrian, as I am and always have been, cars not indicating can be quite dangerous, you know, if you're crossing a road or whatever, so yeah, I do just find their little bits, Indicate! I was like, oh, suddenly there's all these people just looking at me, so I'll pretend I'm talking to Andre, Andre, Indicate!

What it is you wish me to know, I can't tell just by your eyes looking at me, please indicate what you need from me, and still my voice was getting louder and louder, and I didn't want it to, so in the end, I picked Andre up and just ran screaming home, I wonder if anyone noticed, so I don't know where that noise, well not noise, it was nice, nice sound, so here's something I've mentioned a few times over the years, but as it's Christmas, I'll mention it, I had a breakthrough at Christmas, as opposed to

a breakdown, a breakthrough, and I was just staying at my dad's, and just for Christmas, so if I visit my dad, and I haven't visited him for a while, I can't, I can't leave Andre on his own, so for five years, I haven't, I haven't been to my dad's at Christmas for five years, although I do visit him just before Christmas, usually like the weekend before, but then I come home, but I am able to stay overnight, like one night is okay with Andre, if he's got enough food and everything, but at Christmas, there's no

public transport, so if I get there Christmas Eve, so for example, I can't go there Christmas Day, so I have to go Christmas Eve, I have to stay Christmas Eve night, Christmas night, and Boxing Day night, and I don't get to be able to get a transport until the next day, so literally, it's three nights away, three days away, three nights, I can't leave Andre on his own, so that's why I don't do it, technically, I could stay overnight, and I have done a couple of times, I've been away, I went to a wedding, where

I stayed overnight, and as long as he's got food, and he's got water, he's got everything he needs here, he's got toys, he's got his girlfriend, and it's kind of quite nice, because on those occasions, I've done that, and it's very rare, that he's usually quite happy to see me, which is nice, nice that he noticed I wasn't around, but I don't like to leave him on his own, because he's used to me being there, I know that he's, whether he's asleep, or he's just lying down, resting, that he's got my voice, he can hear

me, and unless he is asleep, he might not be able to hear me, but on a level, he's used to hearing my voice, especially making recordings, maybe on the phone, maybe talking to him, or maybe just talking to myself, or perhaps talking to someone else, that happens to be in this room with me, so I guess that possibly gives him a little bit of comfort, unless he just finds it annoying, I don't know, so before I moved here, and had him, because I moved here in April, five years ago, and I had him in the

September, I didn't happen to give birth to him, you know, I just came, he came into my life, it was kind of a weird, weird thing, but it just happened, and regardless of the fact he's completely ruined, ruined the carpet, and makes a mess of the place, I wouldn't be without him, I just love the way he kind of, like earlier on he came up, and I couldn't see him, I saw him come up to me, but I was, I had the recliner up, so I couldn't actually see him, so I put the recliner down,

and he was just sitting there, waiting for me, and I picked him up, and I gave him a cuddle, and I think that's all he wanted, he just wanted to cuddle, and I was like, oh, that's quite nice, so I, you know, I try and give him a few cuddles every day, take him out, usually I take him out like once a day, but sometimes I don't, yeah, but anyway, the, I remember, this is years ago, years, and years, and years ago, years, like 20 years ago, probably, and I've, I'm not so bad now, honestly,

compared to what I used to be, but getting woken up, was something that I really didn't like, in fact, I can only remember, apart from Christmas, birthdays, things like that, you know, like a good, a nice, when something really nice was happening, then I used to love waking up, but I remember what, two times, when I woke up, got woken up, and I was okay with it, once was when I was eight, and I had a date, my very first date with a girl, and we were going to the pictures, to the cinema, to see

a film, and it was a Saturday morning, and they used to have a Saturday matinee, that started at 11 o'clock, or something, maybe 10, I don't know, so, my dad woke me up, because I had to get up early, and you know, meet, I think she was coming around to me, or I was going to hers, I think my dad might have took me there, and I had a box of chocolates for her, and everything, honestly, I was eight years old, very romantic, much more than I am now, and we, I remember my dad woke

me up, and I was so excited, so very, very excited, that I grabbed my dad, and gave him the biggest hug I've ever given him in his, ever, and I remember him saying, oh, and then, yeah, I can't breathe, I can't, and he had to start punching me to get me off, I didn't, but I've really clung to him, I was so happy, so blissed, completely blissful, because I was going to go on this date with this girl, I should add, the girl was 17, I was really looking forward to it, no, she was the

same age as me, probably, and not me now, she wasn't 50, she was eight, when I was eight, can you imagine eight, knocking on the door, yeah, is your mum in, is your grandmother in, yeah, I'm going to the pictures with her, so she, there was that, and then, another time, that I felt really, and I've talked about this before, there was, I lived at my cousin's house, and her boyfriend, now married, lived, they lived together, and they were, they were more my parents' age, she was, or both of them, now his daughter, he had

three daughters, all beautiful girls, and, but there was one, the older one, for some reason, when she woke me up, and she did, she'd wake me up on a Saturday morning, or sometimes, a Friday, you know, a weekday morning, she'd wake me up, and I really didn't like being woken up, but she was insistent as well, she'd knock and knock and knock and knock and knock, at the front door, so I'd go down, absolutely fuming, and I'd open the door, and I'd see her, and the whole, everything changed, everything, the way I felt changed instantly,

just seeing her, sort of being in her presence, and, I don't know how old she was, I think she was, she was his eldest, so she's, I don't know, but I don't know, she was, she might have been in her early 20s, I don't remember, but it's a long time ago, 20 odd years ago, and more than 20 years ago, but we'd, so she was waiting for her dad to come home, because he'd perhaps be on night shift or something, so I would go into the garden, and have a cigarette, so this was in the

summer, I remember one particular occasion, and I, and I was, she was laughing, we were laughing and stuff, and I said to her, what is it about you?

I said, I don't get it, that's what I said to her, I said, I don't get it, is, you know, I've chased people down the street for waking me up before, you know, I've, I used to be really bad, honestly, it was really, it was, yeah, I wasn't very nice when I was woken up, but something about her, it, I said to her, I don't understand it, but, when I'm with you, I, I feel relaxed and calm, and I don't, you know, not with you, but when I was, when it was her that woke me

up, and she had a boyfriend and everything, I never asked her out, I was, didn't even think about it really, but, I remember saying to her, I don't get it, why is, why am I so calm when, when it's you?

I mean, if it was her sisters, it used to, I used to get, I wouldn't get angry, but it used to annoy me, but her, for some reason, it just, yeah, I don't know why, so I used to read her poetry, and sometimes she'd, she'd treat me, treat me, you know, sort of give me a little gift, maybe burst one of my pimples, you know, it's just general, normal friendship, and chase each other around the garden, pretending to be mice, or sometimes I'd pretend to be a rabbit, and she'd pretend to be a wolf, I

don't know why, mind you, she did have big furry ears, so maybe she should have been the rabbit, anyway, so yeah, it's, I can't even remember her name, but she was probably about 10 years younger than me, probably about 10 years younger, so yeah, don't know what, what's going on, don't know where she is, what she's, what she's done, what she's done, where, I mean she might have loads of kids, be happily married, I hope she's happy, I kind of don't care really, well, you know, I do, I hope, I wish her well, but it's

not, I don't care, what do I care, no, I do, you know, it's nice if she's well, but I don't know, I just, but anyway, I had this, it was almost a, I don't want to say spiritual, but it was definitely a, a mind altering moment for me, so I was at my dad's, and his wife, and he had, they had two, two children, I think at this point, the children had moved out, so I think her, her son, my brother or whatever, he moved out as soon as he could, he had his own flat,

that was sort of 16, 17, 18 or whatever, but she still might have been living there, I don't remember, her daughter, my little sister, so that's my dad's wife's daughter, well, I'm asleep, and I wake up, it's Christmas morning, and I wake up to hear my dad's wife and her daughter laughing, giggling, laughing, really, and my initial reaction was, where's the hammer, I gotta stop that sound, I gotta stop that noise, it's like my initial reaction was of aggression, I wouldn't do anything, I'm just, but that was my, it was very negative, and then I

had this epiphany, as I'm lying in bed, it's, first of all, it's Christmas morning, not a good time to murder people, and secondly, what could be a better way to be woken up, than to wake up hearing laughter, okay, perhaps there are better ways to be woken up, but I'm just, generally, you know, to wake up to the sound of laughter, is a beautiful thing, it's actually a beautiful thing, and because it had never happened before, it confused me a little bit, it's like, oh, because I used to, I used to, whenever I got woken

up, I wasn't really myself, for, you know, a fraction of a moment, I'd wake up, I'd wake up like the Incredible Hulk, and then turn into Bill Bixby, managed to calm down, I was like, oh, it's Christmas morning, these are two people I care about, laughing, and they're happy, since then, it broke the, it didn't completely break it, but it changed me, it did, it changed me, it changed my attitude towards being woken up, um, yeah, it did, it did, but it took many years before I was able to get to the point where I

am now, where pretty much nothing bothers me when it comes to sleeping, and it doesn't matter if there's a lawnmower outside, because I sleep during the day quite a lot, and I can sleep, I get woken up by it, I don't sleep through a lawnmower being, you know, the garden being mown, moaned, loaned, mowed, yeah, mowed, lawned, the mowed being lawned, or the hedges being trimmed, you know, it does wake me up, but then I just go back to sleep, I don't have an emotional reaction anymore, the way I used to, and it took me

years to get to the point where I realised that it doesn't matter, it's just sound, it's just sound, change the word noise to sound, sound has no emotional connection, there's no emotions in that word, noise, oh, that's got an emotional, lots of emotions in that one, mainly negative, you know, when I used to use the word noise, I mean, how often does anyone say, oh, please, I love that noise, could you increase it, please, could you be a bit noisier, you know, so, oh, what did you think of the concert, dad, when you were playing

the violin, that noise was great, love the noise you made out of that trumpet, we don't use it, we use the word sound, when it's a positive version of noise, it took me a while, it took me quite a while to get to the point where I realised that, first of all, I was being very, very childish with my behaviour, my reactions, very reactive over something that a lot of times I have no control over, and if it's a situation where you got no control over it, then there's no point really getting upset, is there,

it's like, well, if you've done everything you can do, see, if you go and live on a main road where there's traffic going past all the time, then don't moan about the traffic, you can't, you've chosen to live there, it's not like, well, I didn't know there was a main road there, or how did you get to the house, helicopter, you know what I mean, of course you knew there was a main road there, if you live near a school, you're going to hear school kids, you're going to hear the bells going off every now

and then, and that's just part, it's just standard stuff, you know, don't live, don't move next to a school and then moan because you can hear the school, which is exactly what I did, at least three times in the past, I lived opposite a school before I moved here, and now I live opposite a school again, the difference is, this school where I live opposite is quiet, the only reason is because the playground is behind the school, the school before the playground was in front of the school building, so there was kids playing and screaming

all day long, because they had three different schools all in one place, so constantly there was kids out there, and if they weren't playing, they were doing sports and stuff, so it was all day, it was a little bit frustrating from a sense of wanting to make recordings, but that's all, nothing else, it didn't really bother me any other way, and then I came to have a look at this place, and the main thing is, as long as it's nowhere near a school, and then I see there's a school there, opposite, opposite, like really, in

fact I'm now closer to a school than I was before, not by much, but a few feet closer, oh man, but this is a lot smaller, it's a little school, and the playground's behind the school, so I only really hear when they go in and when they come out in the morning, and a lot of that is just because of the dogs barking outside, there's some lady been taking a dog there, outside the school for five years, now I'm wondering if she even has any kids there, does she just go to chat to people, I

don't know, I don't know, so I learn over time, it's just sound, it's just sound, and I was quite pleased that I managed to get to that point, because I've moved out of places due to neighbours, and see here, I've got neighbours again downstairs, didn't have any neighbours for ages, most of this year really, or at least six, seven months, and six months and then got neighbours again, the previous neighbour was really quiet, and the ones downstairs, it's not that they're noisy, they slam the door a lot, but they have music quite loud sometimes, doesn't

bother me when I'm in bed, I don't care, just doesn't affect me, but if I'm watching television, or watching a movie, or something like that, I don't like to hear, I don't like to have the television up louder, to block out the sound of the music, so what I do now is I put my headphones on, and I watch, I listen through my headphones, that way I can't hear any other music or anything, and because I find it a little bit distracting sometimes, it almost sounds like the music's part of the television programme, so I've

got my headphones, and at night, pretty much after midnight, I wear my headphones, if I'm watching a movie, or if I'm watching Netflix, or something like that, I will use the headphones, but the thing about them is it makes my ears cheesy, and you might think, what did you just say, yeah, see, because they go over my ear, big proper headphones, noise cancelling, they're really good, but they make my ears sweaty, so what I do is, I collect the sweat, it sounds a bit weird, but I just rub my finger over my ears, or whatever,

and sniff it, like you do, it's like, it's cheesy, how weird, by the way, if you look, you know, I'm looking for a girlfriend, so if anyone would like to, contact me, like the sound of me, and I think that sound might, you know, seem like I might be quite a good boyfriend, then yeah, please contact me, my email address is cheesyears1922, and hotmail, oh dear, oh, I do remember, yeah, when I had a job once, where I had to go through applications, applicants who wanted to be a manager of this club, and my boss

said, just go through the app, go through them all, please, because he had loads, and I just had to stick them in different piles, depending on what he wanted, so I did what he said, so I went through them, this was back in, I think, 2010, the amount of emails that people had, that were unprofessional, seriously, one, what was it, I think it was something like, uh, smellyflaps69 at gmail.com, smellyflaps69, honestly, I was like, what, really, this is someone applying for a job as a manager of a nightclub, not that that's a prestigious job, necessarily,

but just, you know, it's a proper job, you know, I imagine there's certain jobs that having an email address, smellyflaps69, would be a good email address, in fact, no, I can't imagine any, any job, I mean, there was even like, there's one like, um, king, kingbigdicklover or something, that's like, at hotmail, I was like, come on, you can't, and then I was, someone was so unprofessional, and you could

see that some people had the same email address from when they were at school or university, you know, it's, um, I'm sure it's what everyone say, something like, uh, a piper day, a pipe, a piper day keeps, keeps the, keep the quack away or something, at gmail, it's like, what?

So yeah, I think it's worthwhile having a, if you're applying for a job, just have your name, if you can, but then that's hard, isn't it? Because if I was to get my name, and I've got my name at hotmail, but if I was to go to get my name now, there's probably, I probably have to sort of, Jason Newland 49 or 73 or 7005 at hotmail, because of the amount of different names, people with my name.

I wonder how many there are, how many Jason Newlands there actually are in the world. There might be thousands, there might be, you know, I don't know. I do find stuff like that funny though, it's like seeing some email addresses, I found it funny, but at the same time, like, wow, I reckon they just forgot.

It's so used to just, especially I suppose if, if somebody hasn't applied for a job for ages or, and you give your email address and it could like, you know, I just, it's so many different, different email addresses that I've seen that were just, not all rude, but sometimes it's wow, jelly belly, things like that. It's like, oh, isnifyousuckatgmail.com. What? It doesn't even make sense. So yeah, it's the king of talcum powder.

I'll make that up. All the rest were real. So yes, I'm a lot better than I used to be when it comes to being woken up.

Yeah, I am. And I'm pleased about that because I didn't really like that part of myself. You know, in the past of a few occasions needed to apologise for my initial overreaction overreaction to being woken up.

But now I'm kind of okay with it. Don't care so much because drifting back to sleep is just so easy. So on that note, I suppose I should bring this to an end.

Thank you for listening. And I want to say thank you to thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you to Katie. So thank you to Katie for your PayPal gift.

Thank you very much. I have thanked Katie as well, you know, directly, but I just thought I'd say it. And so remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy.

Lots of love. Bye.