#462 Let Me Bore You To Sleep - “TO LOVE A MOCKING JASON” Jason Newland (30th July 2020)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name's Jason Neiland and this, this, this, this, this, this is let me bore you to sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. If you hear this sound, it's just the chair and I've tried to edit out all those kinds of sounds but it takes me hours so I'm not gonna bother.

And I say that and then I end up editing. I spend ages editing these recordings. When I say editing, I don't move stuff around, you know, everything's in the same order as it was.

And I try and leave the same gaps between, you know, words as normal. There's so many sounds, the little clicks, maybe it's from the flat, I don't know. And the television sometimes, sometimes it's just I say something and it sounds almost distorted, which I think might be the microphone.

It might be me, it might just be my voice. Anyway, yeah, only listen when you can safely close your eyes if I haven't already said that. Now, yeah, oh dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, this apartment that wants to go into a big rent but I'm not getting because that's not what these recordings are about.

So I've got a message here from June Lin on the website, new customer message. It says, hi, I just wanted to ask how to avail your service. Does anyone understand that question? How to avail your service? Does that mean how to use your service or how to get rid of? Let's see what does the word avail mean? Because I've never used that word in a sentence ever.

Maybe I'll start, avail, help or benefit. Oh, to take, oh, this is in Indian. Use or take advantage of an opportunity available.

Okay, so apparently in Indian. I wonder what it's got Indian there. So it's got some literary, help or benefit, Indian, how to use or take advantage of, noun, use or benefit.

I understand the sense, you know, so he begged her to reconsider but to no avail. I understand it from that perspective, but just not in the context of, I want to ask how to avail, how to avail your service. Maybe it's avail from, yeah, to gain benefit from the service though, but I was, I don't know, I kind of also got, how do I access your service? Because I'm not really sure what to say to June.

If you're listening to this, probably not listening to this. You might be, hi, if you are, and I didn't know. All I'd say is, depends what you're looking for.

I'm, my website has got my main stuff on there. So for example, let's have a look. Oh dear.

What's my website called? That's it. Right. So my website's got the top podcasts, the top four podcasts that I have.

Let Me Boyd Sleep, Deep Sleep Whisperer, Relaxation, Distress, Sleep Hypnosis Weekly. Admittedly, there are other podcasts I've got, but I just want to put those at the top. And then I put on the latest recordings, of which there are quite a few actually, I do believe.

Let me have a look. If you click on latest recordings, there's actually a player of 612 episodes, 526 hours and three minutes worth. And that's all the latest.

And also there's 18 pages of one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, 12, 18 times 12, whatever that is. So it's like a couple of hundred recordings that you can actually download for free. You can download all of them for free.

All of the ones that are available. So I guess it's about whatever you're looking for. If you're looking to be mocked, because you know, this is what these, Let Me Boyd Sleep, you know, it's me, I just mock everything.

What I would say is, if you're looking for something more serious, when I say serious, I mean, kind of therapeutic, the Deep Sleep Whisperer recordings are therapeutic. The Relaxation for Stress are therapeutic. The Sleep Hypnosis Weekly.

I mean, as far as sleeping goes, they're not, you know, therapy, but yeah, the Let Me Boyd Sleep, the one I'm doing now is more of just light entertainment. It's just mucking about me, just saying whatever I want to say, and talking about whatever I want to talk about. And it's a case of, if you're going to listen to these recordings, you've got to take your, you can't be precious, if you're going to listen to these recordings.

You have to realize that it's, you know, it's all done, kind of humor. It's just me messing around. I mean, I'm quite sensitive myself sometimes.

Overly, in fact, sometimes. Actually, my medical condition is emotionally unstable, personality disorder. So yeah, I can be reactive.

I think it's good to, it's useful if you know what something is, and you realize that actually, this isn't the time to be taking offense at anything. This isn't the time to be taking anything seriously during this hour of me blabbering on. And yeah, that's kind of what this is.

It's progressed into this. It didn't start out being this. If you listen to the very first Let Me Boyd Sleep, which is available on my website, and on the, it's available on the podcast, depending on where you go.

Because some, some podcast players, providers, they only play the last 250, or the last 150. If you go on to Spreaker, or as I said, if you go on to my website, you'll be able to go all the way back to number one. If you listen to that, it's me doing a proper hypnosis session.

It's like a sleep session. It's quite a good recording, actually. I listened to it the other day.

I was editing it, listening to it, see if I could find anything that was mildly humorous. And it wasn't anything. The first two recordings, there was, the second one, I started talking a little bit.

Third one, a bit more, fourth, a bit more, to the point where you could say that the attempting to send people to sleep seems to have just got forgotten. Some would argue. But it's still boring.

Still boring. And yeah, so that's what these recordings are about. They're about lots of different things.

I open up about my life. I mix truth and lies together. You know, I mean, if everything I said was true.

I mean, some of the things I talk about, if it was all true, that'd be a bit strange individual. And then for those that listen regularly, you're probably thinking, well, I wonder which ones are true, which bits are true, which ones are just made up. And you start thinking, well, that bit must have been made up.

Yeah, that's what he's talking about. You never know because maybe that was true. So my advice, and maybe I'll start saying this at the beginning of each recording, is only listen when you can not take yourself too seriously.

You know, give yourself a break, which means no matter what I say, don't take it to heart. It's just a bunch of words. I'm not out to cause, not out to destroy anyone's lives.

I mean, come on. So, and I don't also, I'm not out to attack anybody personally, or anyone's beliefs. I honestly don't care about people's beliefs.

I have zero interest in anybody's beliefs. Which means, you know, it's possible to tread on toes in that situation. So if I make fun, I've mocked Buddhism, Buddhists, many times in these recordings, and I'm a Buddhist.

I've said probably more about Buddhism than any religion. And I'm, you know, I was deeply involved in Buddhism. And I still am a Buddhist.

I was raised by Catholic nuns for about two and a half years or something like that. In church every day, lived, and there's a church in the garden, you know, I mean, come on, like a proper church. With Catholic nuns that were abusive and horrible, some were nice, most weren't.

So, yeah, I have, I have a little bit of knowledge about some religions. And I have a great lack of disrespect, I have a great disrespect, not disrespect, but lack of respect. Really, I don't really have a huge amount of respect for religious stuff.

And not like, you know, like, oh, that's sacred. Because I don't really class anything as sacred. Because as far as I'm concerned, someone's religion, someone's religious, someone's religious practices are the equivalent to how someone wipes their bum after going to the toilet.

It's personal to them. It's no one else's business. I ain't interested.

So, everyone's allowed to believe what they believe, and I don't care. It's not, it's not I don't, I don't respect other people's beliefs. I generally don't.

I don't disrespect them either. I just don't care about them. I don't care.

I genuinely have no interest in people's political beliefs, their religious beliefs, whether they, what kind of hatred they have going on, or whatever. You know, especially when it comes, and something that I used to didn't, something that got me, it was more when I was probably late teens, when it's dawned on me, the the lack of compassion by people that were preaching compassion, especially towards people with sexual orientation that didn't, they didn't agree with. And that, that struck me as very odd.

That just, I won't go into details, but I couldn't get my head around that. And I still can't. I can see it from both sides in a sense of, if you're so stuck in your own brain of this is how things should be.

And then something comes along that it goes against that. What do you do? This could be really painful. But my, my personal, my journey, journey, my journey in my life, I'm trying to reduce those beliefs.

I'm trying to get rid of those stupidstitions that are being taught to me. I'm not bored with them. Because if you get rid of superstitions, stupidstitions, then if there's no, if there's no superstitions taught, I don't think there'd be any OCD.

And some might say, especially someone with OCD might think, no, I'm not. The rituals, mate, the rituals, the ritualistic stuff, I doubt you'd find anyone who's born in a non superstitious place, a place where there's no superstitions, no rituals. If there is such a place on the planet, we're taught that stuff, ritualistic stuff.

Of course, we don't burn virgins anymore as a sacrifice. We can have some rain or a good harvest. But which is good.

I'm glad that doesn't happen anymore. Not in England anyway. I don't know about other countries.

I haven't been everywhere. I like to think it doesn't happen anymore. But no one can argue that's the most pathetic thing in the world to do.

But the people that do it wouldn't. The people that do it, if you say to them, you're sacrificing your first born child, so that you can have an abundance during the harvest season, from wherever, whoever gives you that, whatever invisible force. If you say to them, oh, you perhaps, you tried maybe doing something different.

Maybe you're reading a book, learning something, education. They would defend that to the death probably. Because someone's willing to do something as as that.

They're beyond help, I would say. In this lifetime, I think that it'd be very hard to educate someone out of that. Because it's in built.

Well, it's not in built, but it's turned into being in built. It's been taught. But when it's taught from such an early age, it's hard to let that stuff go.

It's much harder when you really, really get on with your parents. So someone's brought up with a racist parent, let's say they're whatever color the parent is, but they say they're really close to their parent, their father, for example, or mother. And that parent is really hateful towards another race of people.

Chances are that they're going to really struggle to not have those same views. And even if they don't like the parent, they're still going to be brought up with those views, possibly. But it's much easier to rebel if you don't like the parent than it is if you do like the parent.

You can rebel kind of short term if you get on with the parent. But if you really don't have anything in common, and you don't perhaps get on with them at all, you can have like a lifetime of rebellion. And then 30 years later, you realize, I'm just like my dad.

He's all right, actually. Maybe he was joking. Maybe he didn't actually mean that stuff.

And I just took it to heart. And then who cares? Just a bunch of thoughts and a bunch of beliefs. It doesn't even mean anything.

It does mean something to other people. So my goal in life is, one of my goals, is to reduce as many of those stupid ideas that I have, that I hold on to. Things that I class for me as limiting, limiting beliefs.

And it's hard. It's not easy. But that's why I try to do the whole idea of if you look at things at various different angles and different opinions, I think it's about not, for me, it's about not getting emotionally entangled.

To not have, I don't really have strong opinions about things. Because pretty much everyone that I've ever known that's had a really, really strong opinions have been assholes. When it comes to that subject, it can be really nice the rest of the time.

And it's like, oh, well, now we're talking about politics. Well, now we're talking about a royal family. And they'll start coming out with this hatred, vile phlegm, shooting out of their ears.

Those royal family living off us. Wow, you were nice a minute ago. What happened? So I don't want stuff like that in my head.

I don't want to have such huge reactions to something that really doesn't matter in a great scheme of things. There's zero I can do about a royal family. Not that I want to.

I'm saying, if I wanted to, who cares? Really? Is that going to extend my life? Is it going to make me really longer? No, it's not. Just worrying about stuff like that and getting uptight about it, it's not going to help me at all. So yeah, like with politics as well.

You know what? I haven't got time. I follow politics from an educational perspective to keep updated. Although I've watched less news lately, because the news was just one subject for what, four or five months.

And it got to the point where I couldn't watch it anymore. And now the news is starting to go back to other things. And I've almost weaned myself off of the news, because I used to watch a lot of news.

I used to, you know, first thing in the morning, I used to watch the bulletins throughout the day. And I sometimes watched the nightly news all night, the nightly news club all night long. But now I see the news once a day.

And that's it, just like a general outline of what's going on. And that's it. And it's not that I think being passionate about something is amazing.

You know, being obsessed with something can be brilliant, if it's useful, if it helps other people, or if it helps yourself, I guess, of course, you know. And being obsessed, being passionate about your own health has got to be a brilliant thing. If you're hugely overweight, with a health condition, and you need, you want to elongate your life, is that the right word? You know, you want to live longer, you want to live healthier, you want to be then to be passionate and to be obsessed, sort of, to reduce the weight and to get fitter, and to be happier and to feel well and all that stuff.

I can see that's beneficial. And my belly's looking up at me and saying, well, what about what? Why don't you do that then? Mr. Slim. Okay.

I think I put weight on. I think I have. So I haven't been to the psychologist since March, February time.

I speak to her every month. And some people are thinking, yeah, perhaps you don't speak to her enough. Maybe you can get an emergency call for tomorrow, Mr. Grumpy Panch.

I have not come across as grumpy. I'm not. I just, I suppose sometimes, you know, I've done 461 of these recordings.

And sometimes I think maybe it's useful for me to let you know where I'm coming from, you know, just, I'm not coming from a serious perspective. I'm not in there to be serious. I do talk seriously sometimes.

But I'm just, you know, if you listen to every one of my recordings, there's probably not one person that wouldn't be offended at something that I've said, you know, along the way. Unintentionally, by the way, not unintentionally offended. I think people enjoy being offended.

It's one of the things that they go like, oh, because some people, I think there's some people that don't feel that they've got a lot of power, a lot of control in the world. So being offended, it gives them that little bit of energy, a little bit of push behind them like, oh, I'm now going to be offended. And I feel powerful and I feel in control.

And I'm, I'm the king of the castle, you know, that kind of mentality maybe. And the way I don't realize is they're not. It's not really, you know, everyone's got the right to be offended, but you've also got the right to not be offended as well.

Maybe it's a nice feeling. I don't really get offended. Maybe it's because I lived in the world of comedy for so long, you know, being in comedy clubs and it's just comedy, every subject's covered.

And that's how I spent my youth, you know, my, not my youth, but my twenties. So all the way from being 20 to 31, I was in comedy land, comedy club land. Even if I'd have a job, I was still there in the evenings.

I was, you know, doing gigs and working in comedy clubs and, you know, involved. So around comedians. So I guess before that, when I was a kid, I needed to be able to take things and not take things too seriously, to deal with the anxiety, to deal with the depression and stuff.

Because when I was a kid, I had, it was not very well a lot of the time, but didn't, didn't know it. And I'd kind of bounce up and down on, you know, I didn't have bouncy feet. What I mean is mood wise, and you've got sponges on your feet.

So I really sort of, I was drawn to comedy because it made me laugh. I felt good. And when I say comedy, I'm talking about anything.

And when I was a kid, whether it was cartoons, whether it was, my favorite was, oh, what's his name now? That's terrible, isn't it? Kenny Everett. I think my favorite was Kenny Everett. And he had a telly, I think it was Kenny Everett's television show.

And he had these funny voices, and I used to love mimicking. And, but anything, anything. Now, I don't know.

It's easy. I think every generation of my age probably says this, whenever it gets us all in our 40s. Oh, TV, children's TV isn't like it used to be.

Saturday night TV isn't how it used to be. Well, no, it's not going to be as it is. It's going to be different.

You know, for my dad's generation, all those people with the TV when he was a kid, most of them would probably be dead now. Plus he was watching on TV, but all black and white TV. The stars of my generation, when I was a kid, most of them probably in prison.

So, you know, you think people when they're getting, other people, maybe in 20 years time, they'll be looking back and thinking, oh, Pepper the Pig, Pepper Pig, remember Pepper Pig? That was proper, proper entertainment. And, you know, so it's just generations, isn't it? But there was a lot of comedy on, a lot of comedy shows aimed at family, like the whole family, like Metal Mickey and even the early morning Saturday night, Saturday morning shows like Tis Was, and this was like late 70s, early 80s. They were, I don't know, yeah, Tis Was and the, I forget the other one.

But they were just, they were fun. And also in the 90s, I used to watch a Saturday morning TV in the 90s. And that used to be good, because it was Anandek, used to be on, this was like literally 92, sometime, something like that.

And they used to have a Saturday morning show with Cat Deely. And it was comedy, it was interviewing celebrities, stars, aimed at kids, but it was adult as well, you know, it was funny. So little kids could watch it and find it funny.

Because there's a lot of slapstick humor, you know, but also the jokes were adult, as well as, you know, so I used to love that. I used to be, I was in my 20s, I used to sit there on a Saturday morning, if I wasn't working, because I'd say probably every, at least every other Saturday morning, I'd be working. But on the Saturdays, I didn't work, I'd be sitting in bed, I'd have my breakfast.

And I'd laugh my head off. Honestly, I absolutely love, love, love, love, love watching, I forget what it was called. I remember there was that show, the CDUK, which was Anandek again, doing a music show, like the top 15 or top 40 charts.

So they basically take up about three, three and a half hours of TV in the morning. And then I'd also watch the Muppet Babies, which was on even before or after, I forget. And honestly, none of this was aimed at me.

None of it was aimed at my age. I was too old to this stuff, but I loved it. Loved it.

And now, there's cookery programs. Absolute shite, cookery programs, or sport. Now, I think the agreement, everyone agreed, there's a social, a socially kind of a quiet agreement.

Everyone sort of agreed that Saturday mornings was for kids. You know, Saturday mornings was for cartoons, is for like lighthearted, fun, fun stuff for kids. Saturday afternoons was sport.

And that was the, you know, that was just how it was. All the way pretty much through, I think the 70s, 80s, 90s, 2000s, even maybe, I don't know. So, you know, there'd be children's programs on the morning.

And then the afternoon, football, generally football, something like rugby. They tried to get rugby to be popular, which seemed to work. There's a real big push to make rugby more popular about 10 years ago or so, maybe more.

And people seem to have been taken in or affected by that. So, I know people love rugby, really love rugby, like hardcore fans. But it wasn't anywhere near as popular as football.

I suppose it still isn't, but it's way more popular than it used to be to the armchair audience. To people that go and see it, apparently, I've been told to the audience, the supporters, spectators, whatever you want to call them, that go to the rugby matches are just really well behaved compared to the football people. And even then, it's only going to be a small percentage that are just there because they're, I don't know, inbred, I guess.

I don't know what you would call them. People that just go out looking for fights, I don't know what. It's like, okay, can we fit a sentence together? I don't know.

It's weird. At one point, a part of me despises people like that. I'm just like, you know, like dog poo on the floor.

Just trotting out. But there's another part of me that thinks, I wish I could have been like that a bit. I wish I could have just been able to have no concern for other people that are around me and to just let loose and to just go and just be completely silly, you know, absolutely just get drunk and just say whatever I wanted to say.

The thing is, I know that I wouldn't have got away with it because I'd have ended up in prison or worse because I, you know, I can't give myself free rein to say whatever I want to say. Well, back then I couldn't because, you know, when I used to go on stage, I used to be able to upset hundreds of people within five seconds of being on stage. I could offend everyone, which is what I did purposely.

So, and I don't do that anymore. That's what annoys me. People say, oh, if they're offended by something, I said, no, you've got no idea what being offended is.

You've not heard me be offensive. I don't do that anymore. This is the nice version of me.

This is me trying to help people, trying to be like a honest and decent version of myself. You know, I could come up on air and do one recording and, yeah, I could just, I have done those in the past, but I never actually released them. Occasionally I'd come on air and I'd do a rant and like, this is what I think.

And then I delete them. I don't like upload them. It's only happened a few times, which is part of the reason I don't do live stuff, just in case, especially, you know, if I'm in a, if I'm doing live and someone says something, you know, a million thoughts come into my brain.

Because I said, I'm also reactive, but on a level that's, that would probably surprise you actually, considering how quiet and how slow I am when I make these recordings, and not always so slow. So, you know, I have to keep myself in check, like a good little Buddhist and very, I try and keep myself and make sure that I'm a good little boy. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

And, you know, there's nowhere to go with that stuff. People do just vent and just say horrible stuff and say what's on their mind all the time. No one likes them.

They are human, they're amusing to be around sometimes. As long as the, as long as, you know, you're not the focus of their attention, or their anger. So sometimes, you know, if you hear something like they're ranting and raving, like, it's really funny.

But I'm glad it's not at me, because that wouldn't be so pleasurable, you know. It's just almost, it can be funny. And that's, I think that's, there's a character on TV called Alf Garnett.

And he was in a couple of really, really popular TV shows, comedies, in the 70s and 80s. In fact, even in the 90s. Until death do us part.

And I don't know the other one. But he was basically a bigot. He was a racist, homophobe, everything.

He was just a complete bigot. And he'd go into these rants. And it was funny.

Because of him. Now, if someone else had said it, in a different way, it would have been offensive and disgusting. But it was funny, because he was so pathetic.

And it also, he'd have, he'd go into rant, then he'd have his whole family, his daughter, his wife, and his son-in-law, who happens to be the father of Tony Blair's wife, ex Prime Minister Tony Blair's wife. How about that for a bit of trivia? And they would mock him, they just make fun of him, because he was so uptight and had such limited beliefs. But sometimes, you know, they just mocked him and laughed at him the whole time, which kept him going even further and stronger.

It was funny. But what he's saying wasn't funny. How he was saying it.

And to be fair, I haven't seen, they wouldn't even put that program on telly anymore, wouldn't be allowed. So I've not seen it to hear. I might feel differently.

If I heard it now, it might feel like, oh, no, at the time, didn't bother me. Because I knew what it was about. I knew it was making fun of him being a bigot, being a pathetic human being with all these horrible beliefs, but at the same time being vulnerable.

Because he wasn't horrible through, all the way through. He was also loving. And it turned out his best friend, really, the person that he really loved, when it came to the end of the show, I think his wife died.

But it was his helper, who was a black man. And he was being horrible towards him for ages. And this, this bloke would be, he ended up being a really big actor.

And he'd get mocked, mocked out of Ghana, and make fun of him. And, yeah, it was just really, and they ended up being really close near the end. Because he was one of the only people that he saw.

And there was kind of love there, even though because it's so he, he spent all his life being racist. And then he ended up depending upon someone that he'd spent his whole life being feeling hatred towards. And then he, I guess, you know, he was able to see that person as a human being, which is, I think it's really clever the way they did it.

But at the same time, it appealed to people that are racist. Because I think a lot of people watching it laughing at what he was saying, the fact that he was getting away with it. Because in reality, in reality, you would not get away with that.

Maybe in your own home. But you know, I mean, what was he in London, in London, someone like that would not have got away with being like that. Like in a pub.

Well, maybe some pubs, but I remember there was, I was actually in a pub in Stanway, when I started doing my college course. Honestly, I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I was just in there.

I'm not sure if there was a saloon bar. There was like the main bar with a pool table. And it was across the road from where I lived.

And I was just having a pint of lager. And some blokes started telling jokes. And all of them were racist jokes.

And this is in 2007, or 2008. You know, this isn't the 70s or the 80s. This is like, you know, there was a time when it was acceptable to do that.

Socially, I mean, not morally, but socially, it was okay. You know, there was, people just did it. And so when I was a kid, I didn't used to have much.

So I, when I was growing up as like a teenager, all I knew was white people. I lived in a white town. It was like one of those old fashioned, you know, there was a couple of people that weren't white there.

But I didn't know anyone at school. It was a mixed race lad that lived up the road from me. He was a couple of years older.

It literally was really, you know, there was no point telling racist jokes because no one was going to get hurt. There was no one to be the butt of the joke. When you're at school, the whole point is to really cause distress to somebody, which is kind of horrible, isn't it, I suppose.

So I didn't really, I saw that stuff on telly, but I didn't have much of that in school because there was no one to pick on. But plus, to be fair, I think if I'd have seen someone being picked on, I'd have intervened because I didn't like bullies. So I used to, if I saw someone or someone verbally being rude to somebody because of their colourless skin or something, I would have ripped them apart, verbally at least.

Maybe not physically, but verbally, I just made fun of them. I did that when I had a job in a, what was it, a meat factory. When I was about 90, I wasn't 90, I look 90 now, about 91.

A lot of African men work in there. And West Africa, I don't know which part, but apparently, I don't know why, there was this big influx into East London, a lot of them working. It was probably because it was most of, well, all of them were temps, including me.

Temps, they didn't have permanent jobs there. But there was one point where there was probably 70 to 80% African working there. And I loved it.

Because part of the reason I loved it is because they were friendly, friendlier than the white people, for some reason. And there was quite a few old, proper old, East End, racist people working there. And I loved seeing how uncomfortable they looked.

I enjoyed that. And also, they couldn't talk the way they would normally talk. I had to be careful.

Because even in the 90s, you could get away with a lot, but there was still stuff you couldn't get away with anymore. We had kind of moved, getting close to the, you know, you can't just be outwardly disgusting as a person, you know. I know some people are, but... And there was this, I worked with this bloke, what was his name? Thomas.

We had a weird relationship because we liked each other, but we hated each other sometimes. So we used to end up fighting quite a bit. So we're kind of the same age.

And he was, we used to just, honestly, we used to get into fisticuffs, pushing each other. But then we'd be best friends after. It's really weird.

I don't quite know why. And we used to make fun of each other. I think that's what it is.

We just pushed each other too far. But I like, you know, I got on really well with him. So Thomas and Guy was another one.

Another one? What do you mean another one? Guy was another one of my friends. I didn't get to know everyone because there was different departments. And it was only one, two, four, six, seven people working in my little bit where I worked.

Well, it was a big bit, but there was seven people, three machines. Actually, sometimes, yeah, seven, sometimes eight, if it was really, really busy. So there was already one, two, three people working there.

So sometimes it'd be, yeah, different people. But I didn't get to know a lot. I got to know quite a few of the non-English people.

And I liked them. I never really had a, here's a little secret. I shouldn't tell anyone.

When I was in my twenties, when I was in my late teens, I wanted to be black. I might say my most stupid thing in the world, but I kind of did. I was a big fan of Malcolm X. Every musician I liked was black.

Every sports star I liked was black. Every, everyone, you know, all the comedians, every comedian, pretty much, like, you know, what's his name? Eddie Murphy and Bill Cosby. And what's his name? Townsend and Red Fox.

You know, I don't know if you know Red Fox, but he's a great comedian. He's dead. And I kind of, and my first proper girlfriend was black as well.

She's from Trinidad. And this is before I knew, I didn't really understand. I'm never going to understand what it's like to be a different race.

I don't understand the whole race thing. But yeah, again, I don't know. I don't know what it's like.

I don't really, I'm never going to understand it. Emotionally, but yeah, I have studied old Malcolm X's speeches. I love Malcolm X. This is before he was popular.

I mean, obviously popular in the 60s, but before he was, they made the movie about him. And he's become over the last 30 years or 20 years, he's become, you know, there's that icon, isn't it? People walking around with Malcolm X t-shirts and stuff. But he is someone that I would love to have met because he was flexible.

I like the way, I think he, I don't think he would like, actually, to be fair, he would have liked me. I think he would have probably hated me to start with because, oh, white man, don't want to talk to a white man. But then when he got started talking to me, I think he'd realized that I wouldn't take any of his crap and make him laugh.

And I don't know, I might be wrong, but very intelligent. And the whole, for me, it wasn't about race. It was just about respect, about being treated, being treated different to other people.

For what? That doesn't make sense for me, you know, whether it's sexuality, whether it's whatever. It's just like, come on, man, how long are you going to live? Are you going to live forever? You have to put up with this forever. Is it really other people's love orientations really affecting your life that much? How does it affect you when you're in bed, when you're in the bath? Does it affect? No.

Yeah, I did, I wanted to. I think part of the reason is when I, I think I spoke, when I used to talk on the phone, people would meet me and say, well, we thought you was black, which is, I didn't really understand it, but I liked that. I thought, yeah, it might be because, I didn't mention Richard Pryor, isn't that weird? Eddie Murphy, Bill Cosby, why don't we mention Bill Cosby before Richard Pryor? Bill Cosby, the king of comedy, big, big fan of Richard Pryor.

And I think I used to talk a bit like him, so that I used to have a really good impression of Richard Pryor. Why don't you just shut up? You ain't talking. That's not very good.

It's better if I can do it louder. I used to be a huge fan of, I was, I was a fan of him twice. What do you mean? How could you be a fan of someone twice? Well, I was a fan of him as a comedy actor.

Didn't know he did stand-up comedy. I was a kid. I never got to see that stuff.

Because unlike most comedy actors who do comedy shows where you could see them, they're like, when I was younger, well, maybe not. I don't know. They just, I don't know.

Robin Williams, for example. He didn't have to be 18 to watch Robin Williams. Mind you, he used to swear.

Oh, I'll just readjust myself. Oh, that's nice. I don't know.

I've just, anyway, I loved, I actually watched Brewster's Millions last week. I think it was Sunday. And I was, I shouldn't do this really, but I went online and I just, I wanted to search out a character because there was someone in there and I'm pretty sure it was John Candy's brother was in the show.

I know he was in the film, but John Candy's brother was in it as well. Because there was someone in there that looked like him and sounded like him. And, and I started to think, well, if it is him, why didn't John Candy's brother have the same opportunities as John Belushi's brother? I don't know.

I started thinking that. So I went online and then I started seeing the reviews for Brewster's Millions when it first came out and didn't get many good reviews. Yet when I watched as a kid, loved it.

And it wasn't about being hilariously funny. Richard Pryor, just mucking around and being, you know, it was just so likable to watch, so vulnerable. And, you know, if you've got Silver Streak, Stir Crazy, See No Evil, Hear No Evil, The Toy, I'm trying to think, I think it's The Toy where he's basically just a play thing for this little kid.

You know, he's hired to just look after this little kid and keep the kid amused. And he gets introduced to the kid to say, this is Master Bates. And Richard Pryor's laughing his head off.

You just say Master Bates? See, my impression is terrible. Master Bates. Of course, if Eddie Murphy did it again.

And so I watched all those early films. I watched every comedy film as possible, especially when video shops opened. Genuinely, I think I watched every single comedy film that's ever been available to rent.

Really, huge comedy fan back then. And then, when I was about 18, I discovered Richard Pryor, a stand up comedian, didn't even know he did it. You know, I didn't know about that.

I could not believe what I was hearing. I could not believe it. You know, if you've never heard Richard Pryor live on stage, you've never heard any of his albums.

And then you're in for a treat. Obviously, you've got to have an open mind. If you get offended, then, you know, go back to crocheting.

I want to learn crocheting, actually. Dear Jason, don't mock crocheting. I, yeah, I like, yeah, if you listen to it, it's amazing.

Also, another one is, what's his name? He's also dead now. Who actually influenced Richard Pryor? George Carlin. George Carlin.

He ended up being also very similar in a way. Yeah, kind of the same kind of profile as Richard Pryor. As I personally, if I was going to choose between Richard Pryor and George Carlin, I'd probably say George Carlin is funnier.

I would say funnier. But Richard Pryor was more honest. He really opened up, really opened up.

George Carlin, the rant, especially near the end, you know, the last 20 years, it'll be more ranting and ranting and ranting. And it was funny because he was old. Because he was older, he had a grey beard, grey hair, all bald and grey beard.

He could get away with it. Because he could say, well, look forward to whatever. I'm not going to say stuff, but he could say stuff.

And it'd be funny because it was coming out of the mouth of an older gentleman. And we never got to see that with Richard Pryor. Never got to see what he would be like in older age.

Because he got ill at quite a young age. And he was pretty much out of the limelight for the last 20 years, really, much of his life. He did a few appearances, but he didn't, you know, he wasn't around.

It's a little bit like, what's his name from? Back to the Future. George, or whatever his name is, I don't know. Oh, God, what's his name? You know, Back to the Future.

He was in Spin City. I loved Spin City. He, one of my favourite actors, comedy actors, he was so good.

In some ways, better in TV than he was in films, although he was brilliant in films. But he, I think in TV, you can probably show more of the, it's more focused just on him, with Spin City. And, you know, he was brilliant.

His name's gone out of my head for a second, it will come back in a minute. But since he stopped doing Spin City, he got ill, didn't he? And he hasn't, I've seen him in a few things, but he's hardly really does it, you know, he just can't do that much on TV. He's raising money, awareness for Parkinson's, I think it is.

But he's such a comedic brilliance. He's so lovable. There's something about that.

He was so lovable, so nice, and he wasn't even a particularly nice person in Spin City. That's the thing, he was a bit of an arse. But he's still lovable, he's got that, he's still got that young face, you know.

And I would have liked to have seen what he would do in later age, because he'd now be, he's got to be in his late 50s now, because I'm nearly 50. And he was, he's probably not that much older than me, to be fair. He did Back to the Future, what, in about 1983, was it? 84? 83? 82? So I'd be 12.

So he wouldn't have been more than about 18, maybe 20. So yeah, so he's probably about 56, 57. Let me check.

Let me just do one little Google check and I'll go away. I'll leave you alone. Let's have a look.

So, of course, I know his name anyway, Michael J. Fox. Now that I've looked at it, he is 59, see? Before he'd be late 50s, 59. He is active, 73 to present.

Yeah. When's the last time he made a film? Wow. He is still making films.

So I think he does, yeah, he's done some documentaries where he's himself. And he also does voices as well. I didn't know that.

He was Stuart Little's voice. Did you know that? Stuart Little. Stuart Little.

Yeah. He was in 99. He was Stuart Little.

Wow. Well, he is Stuart Little. And he also does a voice of Archie.

I don't know what that is. And television. I know one.

Oh, see, he's still doing stuff. He's still doing stuff in on television as well. He played Ethan West in Designated Survivor for five episodes.

Not good for him. Well, the Michael J. Fox show. I didn't even know.

I'd never seen that on telly. It was 22 episodes of that. That wasn't in the UK.

It's also, what I did see is Curb Your Enthusiasm. He was in two episodes of that. It's very funny.

Played himself. It's very, very funny. You might, why I suggest maybe go onto YouTube and just put in Michael J. Fox, Curb Your Enthusiasm, or Best Bits or something like that.

And you'll see that he's, yeah, it's very funny. I used to love Family Ties, 82 to 89. So he kept doing Family Ties even during Back to the Future.

Well, that's weird, isn't it? What do you think? I didn't realize that. He did Back to the Future in 85. Then he did Teen Wolf, Light of the Day, Light of Day, Secret of My Success, Big Lights, Big City, Casualties of War.

Back to the Future Part Two was in 89. And then 90 was Back to the Future Part Three. I'm pretty sure they filmed both of those films, like at the same time.

Pretty sure. I have a little memory of that. Then he did The Hard Way, Doc Hollywood.

Yeah. Oh, The Frighteners. I watched.

Yeah, that's a good film. 96. Stuart Little, of course.

Miles Attack. That's a funny film. Wow.

So he was Palmerstone USA, 80 to 81. He was in 11 episodes of that. So Family Ties to 89.

So what? Wow. Isn't that amazing? So he was in that TV show, and he became probably the biggest Hollywood star when he did Back to the Future. That must have made him one of the biggest Hollywood stars, wasn't it, that film? Massive, massive film.

Then he did Teen Wolf, another massive, massive film. Light of Day. I've got no idea about that.

The Secret of My Success. I remember these films, but again, Back to the Future Part Two, Back to the Future Part Three. They were the big ones.

So he was a massive star, but he was still doing Family Ties. Was he there right away to the end? He wasn't, was he? Justin Bateman. Oh, Justine Bateman.

She was his sister, wasn't she? And then Justin Bateman. Jason Bateman, who is 51. It's really weird.

Jason Bateman being on television. Seriously. He's been on television.

He's had so many different TV shows, or so many films. Wikipedia has to have a different page for his filmography. Seriously.

His first film was 1986, and he's been in lots. Television. 1981.

The Little House on the Prairie. What? 21 episodes. James Cooper Ingalls.

21 episodes. So I guess he was a kid in there. Silver Spoons.

21 episodes. 82 to 84. He was in Knight Rider.

It's Your Move. Never heard of that. Matthew Burton, he played.

18 episodes. Something Elsewhere. The Wonderful World of Disney.

The Hogan Family. I used to watch that. 110 episodes.

Yeah, he was great in that. Basically, for me, that took over from the other one. Kind of almost took over from the one with Foxy.

The one that he was in. It was kind of a similar show. Family Ties and the Hogan Family.

Very kind of similar things. Wow. Simon.

21 episodes. Never heard of that. George and Leo.

97 to 98. 22 episodes. He's been in so many things.

Arrested Development, of course. 84 episodes. Wow.

And now he's in Ozark. And he's got another one, two, three other things coming out. And this is from 1981.

1991, 2001, 2011, 2021. So basically 39 years. 39 years he's been working.

39 years and he's only 51 years old. That's amazing. I just need to just check one thing.

I'm just out of interest. Jason Bateman's net worth. It says 30 million.

I thought he'd be worth more than that. I'm not saying that's not a nice little mystic, but 39 years. 39 years.

Most people work that and then they're retiring, aren't they, after that? Well, maybe a little bit more, but wow. See, I don't understand that. It's 30 million, but he gets paid 300 grand per episode for Ozark, which he's doing now.

Mind you, I think in some places, you can lose up to 50% of your salary anyway from tax and with celebrities and they've got management and all kinds of different people to pay out. So he'll only get, even if he earned 10 million a year, he'd probably end up with maybe 2 million a year out of that only. Mind you, someone gave you 10 quid and then said, oh, wait a minute.

Well, $10. Wait a minute, I actually need to take eight out. Did you take expenses and tax and gave you $2 back? You wouldn't be happy, would you? Yeah.

Yeah. So that's it. I'm going to go, thank you for listening.

Again, this will be another random blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, which is good, which is the whole point of it. Randomness, random randomness. So lots of love.

Remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy. Remember to see the lighter side of things. If you can, just give yourself a rest from taking things too seriously and realizing that it's going to be all right if you allow it to be.

And you can feel relaxed if you allow yourself to feel relaxed. Lots of love. Bye.