#434 Let me bore you to sleep - Jason Newland (21st June 2020)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland and this is Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. So yeah, hi, hi everybody.

Today, what day is it? It is Sunday the 21st of June. So I don't think I made a recording yesterday, a Let Me Bore You one. So I was going to try and do one during the day yesterday.

I mean, it's literally just turned midnight. It's 21 minutes past midnight. But I've got new neighbors that have been moving in.

I've got 100 children. So it just wasn't quiet enough to make a recording. I did manage to do a sleep whisper recording.

It's just basically dismisses what I previously said. But it was, you know, it's only like 19 and a half minutes longer. What are you doing Andre? What are you doing? Can we get up? He does indeed want to get up and have a cuddle.

You can say hello to all your fans. You can do one of your little sneezes. It's really hot in here.

Just in the living room. I went into the bar and the hallway, not hot at all, really hot in the living room, but proper warm. I don't know what that's about.

It's very strange. The heat's not on, obviously. I say that obviously, because I did just check.

Are you all right? Yeah. He's been out twice already. We just went out about half hour ago.

So you don't need to go out again, do you? Not till tomorrow. No, you've had enough. You've had enough of walking about.

Yes, you have. Yes, you have. Yes, you have.

I think he might even... Oh, there you go. I think he might fall asleep. I'm talking probably much quieter than I normally do, because I've now got neighbors below me for the first time since January.

So being awake at night is probably not the best idea in the sense of this is when I get my work done, but I also don't want to disturb anyone else. I didn't seem to disturb the other neighbor, but it's hard to tell. What has he got on him? Just looking at his back.

His tail's all fluffy. Why is your tail all fluffy? You turned into a squirrel. Are you turning into a squirrel? You sure? You need daddy kisses? I'm just laying him down on my legs.

Oh, no, he doesn't want that. Okay, see you later then. Bye, bye, bye.

Oh, it's like this Groundhog Day. He's now there with his slipper. He was happily asleep until I started this recording.

He's now got a new place to sleep as well. It's a bag. I don't know if you listened to my recordings last week, but I took him to the vets on Monday.

And his bag, the zipper on his bag broke, really broke properly. So I couldn't take him in there. And my friend lent me a little backpack bag, just a little one, one that you can put on your back and pack stuff in it, I suppose.

Well, when I got him home, I brought the bag down to my friend and he said, oh, you might not keep it. So I said, okay. So I got him some beers to pay for it.

And it was, I'm never going to use a bag for anything other than for him, just to take him to the vets. Because once he's been in it, it's now his bag. He can't really use it for anything else.

And I'd forgotten about it. I just, I used it. Where did I use it? Yeah, I put it down there.

I forgot where I put it. I just heard him scratching in the hallway. And because it's gone 12 and now I'm thinking about the neighbors a bit more.

So I went to find out because I was just a little bit worried that he might have trapped himself somewhere because he hasn't got quite the leverage that he had, you know, when he's got all four of his feet or four of his, you know, stencils or whatever you want to call them. Stencils. Anyway, and he wasn't at all.

He's basically, the bag was covered up in newspapers that I just dumped on top of them near the door. And he'd dug himself into the bag. I think he managed to open the zip as well from the outside.

And he was inside the bag asleep. Well, he was curled up. I mean, he can go to sleep pretty quickly.

So I couldn't find him. So I picked the bag up just to see if he was in there. And he was.

Or I might just pick the bag up to move it out of the way. And he was in there. Whichever version you want to believe, I guess.

And I thought, oh, okay. He's now adopted this bag. Now, the good thing about that is the next time I take him to the vet, which will be Wednesday, he won't make a big fuss about being in the bag because he's now got his smell in there.

And he started sleeping in there. And the way he works, he'll be sleeping in there a lot probably for the next, he might be sleeping in there for the whole summer. He just likes to have a, he likes to swap up his routine.

Plus the bag's padded inside. So it's very comfortable for him. And he likes to be in a place where it's, I think he feels that he can't be got to, even though I can just pick the bag up but the zips only open a little bit.

He likes that because he can just get in and out of like a hole. And yeah, he's just seems happy. So I'm happy with that.

If he's happy, I'm happy. So that's his new thing. I don't know what happened to the other bag that I had for him because I got another backpack bag that someone sold to me and the zip broke straight away.

What should I say? I put him in the bag, went into the garage and suddenly I realized he was on the floor in the garage. He'd escaped and broken the zip in the process. So it's a really, really crappy bag.

It was a crappy zip. The bag I'm sure was lovely, but the zip wasn't. But he did start sleeping in that bag.

But I don't know where it is. I don't know where I put it. Maybe he's got it somewhere and he sleeps in it.

He hides stuff. He does. He's in my shed in my bedroom.

He's got stuff stored in there. So yeah, I've got a bit of a cough. I keep having to press pause and cough.

I don't know what's going on. I don't know why. So he's now over there doing his thing.

Which is good. That's cool. It's been a weird day for me.

Not weird, a bit of a... I don't know, I wouldn't call it a successful day. I haven't... Yes, I think not last night, but like Friday night up to now, I've not really accomplished a huge amount. I made a couple of recordings.

They're not, you know, not classed as particularly successful. And now I'm thinking, Andre making that noise over there, scratching around and banging against the radiator. It's not going to be good for me, is it? My new neighbor.

Because the new neighbor thing, because they can hear it. Because I can hear my neighbor downstairs when she used to bang her radiator. Probably like sweeping up or vacuuming or something.

So him banging against the radiator, I can hear it in my bedroom when he's in here. And also when I'm in a hot air balloon above. I can also hear him.

I can't if I've been in a hot air balloon. Never fancied it. It's a bit like swimming with sharks.

Never fancied it. No. Standing up on a plane while it's flying around.

You know, those people that stand on the tops of little planes. Never fancied it. Trying to kiss a lion.

Never. Well, some of them are cute, but yeah, generally never fancied it. Hiding inside an elephant's shoe.

Nope. Never fancied it. So it's one thing I've discovered because I'm now researching the podcasts to, I don't know, just to become more proficient, more professional with my knowledge of the promotional side.

Because at the moment, all I do is just share on, well it's not, okay, I've done quite a lot, but I share on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube. I did do a lot of sharing on making sure they're on all the different podcast directories and the podcast apps and they're on most of them. Some of them they're not, but most of them they are.

So I discovered a few things that last day or so. The first thing is that I can actually, I can get the statistics for my Spotify, for my apps on, for my podcasts on Spotify. Now I get them in my normal statistics on Spreaker that tells me how many on Spotify have been listening and stuff, but I can get much more detailed stats on Spotify itself.

And I never knew how to do that. So I found that out yesterday, which means I can see the different countries, I can see the age groups. And what was interesting from an information perspective is I think 78% of the people listen to me are female on Spotify.

Maybe not on all the other places, but in Spotify, 78% is female. So yeah, that was, I don't know if I'm surprised at that because most of the people that contact me are female, but I do get male men contacting me as well. And only a tiny, tiny percentage of people that, of our people that listen to me will ever contact me.

Tiny, tiny percent, but it's still a few. So I don't always, I can't always reply straight away. And if someone adds me on Facebook and I don't know who they are, I generally add, I allow anyone to add themselves.

And then they start sort of saying, how are you? And I was like, I don't know who they are. Yeah, I'm alright. But I don't know who they are.

And I had someone say, where are you from? I just, I don't know who they are. I don't know. So I replied to someone, I said, can I just ask why you added me? Because this isn't on the Facebook page.

This is on my private, not private, my personal Facebook page. Not on the Facebook page where you just follow or like, or the let me bore you to sleep Facebook page. And I've not had a reply yet.

I just, the reason is, not the reason I've not had a reply, because I don't know what that reason is. I might be busy eating caviar. I don't know.

But I just, it's like a lot of people, most people, in fact, that contact me, tell me why they contacted me. You know, they'll say, oh, thank you for what you do. Or, you know, I listen to your recordings.

They're awful. Please stop. You know, whatever, you know, can we be friends? You know, it's usually a reason.

But after that, and if someone has contacted me and says, how are you doing? How's Andre? I will, you know, I'll reply and say, yeah, thank you. He's still annoying and all that. But mind you, if someone's, if their first message is how is Andre, then I'll assume that they listened to the recordings because how else, and I suppose they wouldn't really know about Andre, would they, otherwise.

I talk about him too much, don't I, I think. I think I talk too much anyway. I definitely don't say the right things sometimes.

Hey, we're not perfect, are we? None of us. I never wanted to be perfect. I'd sell for decent, you know, sell for a fairly decent person who tried to help.

Yeah, I feel, I like that label, you know, that Jason, he tried to help people, not hurt them. Doesn't mean I haven't hurt people because we all hurt people, actually, you know, without knowing sometimes, you know, just by saying the wrong thing, or I know I have, doing the wrong thing, stealing the car, you know, sinking a yacht. It's all kinds of things, you know, just little things you don't mean to do.

But I always wonder what my epitaph, is it epitaph? Is that what they put on the headstone, epitaph? And I'm not talking about this in a morbid way. I'm just in a kind of positive way. I wonder what my epitaph would be.

I really did exist. I don't know. I don't know, maybe I wish people that I knew liked me or thought of me the way that people that I don't know do.

Or, you know, something like that. I wish people that I knew in real life regarded me with the same kind of, I don't know if respect is the right word, probably not, but regard. Regarded me in the same regard, which doesn't make sense to have that in the same sentence.

Positive regard. And who valued me or valued what I did, what I do now. But, you know, when I'm gone, it's what I did, isn't it? I'm not sure.

Just, there's just something happened tonight. It was about an hour ago and it's a little bit disturbing. I'm not going to talk about it, but it's just got me thinking a little bit.

It's like, oh, I wonder what's going to happen here. So, can't be everything to everybody. But I seem to, I don't know why, I'm sorry if this is being all serious, but, you know, I can't be hilarious all the time.

Come on. Some of you might be thinking, yeah, but now and then would be nice. Occasionally, just the occasional joke.

Okay, I've got a joke for you. Let me think. I had it in the head.

Okay. I'm trying to think what it is. I just realized I pressed the pause button and I've been talking for about 20 minutes and I don't even know what I've talked about.

Genuinely don't know what I've said and what's been recorded. So, I'm going to repeat just two things and then I'll just get on with it. I want to repeat, and if I have said this already, then tough.

You know, I'm not doing it to annoy you. I had two PayPal gifts, one from Cindy, one from Jules. So, thank you to both of you.

I really appreciate it. And I'll put a thing on my pod, you know, if you'd like to help with the podcast payments and for the website payments, you go to paypal.me forward slash Jason Newland, links on my website. And I just posted that on Facebook.

And I just want to say thank you to the two of you that have helped me out. So, that's really, really grateful. If I've just repeated myself, then sorry about that.

But I've literally been talking for 20 minutes, I think. And I had this thing on mute, on pause rather, because Andre was making some weird noises and I pressed the pause button. Wow.

This happened a few times over the years, but hasn't happened lately. There's one time that I did a whole recording, a whole recording. And at the end of it, not only had I not pressed the record button on my tablet, I was actually sitting on a bus.

It's like, oh my goodness, it's like a whole hour. I don't know what I was doing on the bus for a whole hour because the journey is only 20 minutes. I've gone backwards and forwards three times.

Very strange day. There was a time when I used to record. See, because I use a tablet.

The reason I use a tablet is because it's way better than the laptop for recording. Not just because my laptop's on its last legs, keeps shutting down, keeps freezing, stuff like that. Although it's been pretty good today.

So I'm quite pleased. It's been pretty good yesterday as well. Excuse me.

I used to press the play, the pause button when I make weird noises like that, but I'm a little bit scared to press the pause button in case I forget to press it back. So with the tablet, I have this tablet specifically, specifically for recording, which means nothing else is on it. Nothing else is not being used for anything else.

And I'm pleased with how it's going. I'm pretty pleased with the quality of the sound. I'm sure that it will improve over time, you know, 10 years time, the quality of sound would probably be just phenomenal.

But I think that the sound is fairly good and I'm starting to learn that I can probably get it on, do the editing on here. So that's what I might look to start doing. That would make sense, actually, to start doing everything on this tablet.

Like the editing rather than using the laptop, because the laptop's really, it ain't doing, ain't doing what it needs to do. So maybe, and there's a thing called Leveler. It's an app.

And what it does is it levels the sound out. So I know sometimes the volume goes up a little bit, in my recordings, I try not to do that. And I try to reduce the level of those little spikes.

It's not always easy to do that, but I do try. But this app, I've not tried it out yet. I use the word try a lot, haven't I? I'm a tryer.

Maybe that should be on my headstone. He's a tryer. Or he was a tryer.

Someone said to me once, you're really clinging on to life, aren't you? Almost like I should let go, like I should give up. I don't want to give up. It's the only way you can fail is by giving up.

It's the only way. I don't want to fail. With this, there are things to give up though, like stress, anxiety, holding on to anger, that stuff to give up.

But not your dream, following, doing what you're doing. And if you find something that has meaning, meaning, I sound like a little like, yeah, meaning, if you find something that's got meaning. Yeah, I'm really, there's an old story about someone that, you know, I do listen to quite a few books, audio books.

And there's a story about this bloke that had him, he bought a farm and someone told him that there was diamonds on that farm. And he bought this whole area of land, and he couldn't find anything. Couldn't find anything.

He was digging and he couldn't find anything. And he gave up. And I think he'd like dig up, a mine or whatever.

He gave up, sold the equipment for scrap and just left. Someone came along and was walking through a stream that was part of this land and found a little diamond. So what this person did, he said, okay, I'll buy the land with the diamond, he paid for the land, got the machinery, and he started searching, and the place was full of diamonds.

And he became rich. So that person is just a little bit away from finding something. He just didn't find it yet.

The original person didn't find it yet. So not found success yet, but it doesn't mean it won't come. And then success is dependent, isn't it? It depends on what you're looking for.

If you gauge success by financial income, financial benefit, then yeah, then I'm not a success. But if you class success by getting positive feedback from people, and having listeners increasing constantly, the views, stats, we love the word stats, don't we? Then yeah, I'm doing pretty okay. And yesterday, or Friday, I got nearly 6,000 downloads.

It's not a bad one, is it? I got 4,000 yesterday. I don't know. I think it's pretty groovy.

And it's growing. And I discovered something. Discovered something.

My digital recordings have not been correctly done to be found on Google search engine. So I'm doing this research online, trying to become a bit more professional with the promotional side of the podcasting. It's one thing making a recording, and then uploading, editing, uploading, sharing.

But that's just a part of it. There's so much more to do. And I've not really been putting too much effort into that side of things, as much as I could.

So technically, I could just stop making new recordings, focus on promoting the podcasts that I've already done, and get a huge amount more people listening. Because at the moment, it's happening organically. I don't know where people are coming from.

Honestly, I don't. I don't know where the new people are coming from, how they find me. I am, although I was quite interested, here's something.

I don't know, I might have mentioned this yesterday. But I probably didn't because I didn't make a recording yesterday. So that wouldn't really make sense, would it? So here we go.

If I go to Google, Google on my phone, okay. If I put hypnosis, hypnosis podcast, I'll put in hypnosis podcast. Okay, so this is Google.

So what I'll do, I wonder if there's a way of me, no. So I've never looked for it before on on my phone. I've done it on my laptop.

So the first basically says podcast series at the top of Google. And it lists, this isn't even different podcasts. This is just what Google sort of listed at the top brain software with Mike Mendel, hypnosis and NLP with Donald Curry, hypnosis of Joseph Cloth.

So fourth down is me, relaxation, hypnosis, stress and anxiety. And then there's another one, hypnotherapy and mental health. And then I'll skip along to the next page.

There's 123 above me, then there's deep sleep, whisper hypnosis, sleep hypnosis weekly. Click on to next page.Me again, sleep insomnia, hypnosis.

Another one from someone else. Let me boy to sleep. Another one, another two from other people.

And nothing for me on the next page. And then next page, sleep, relax, sleep and relax, hypnosis with music. And then next page, relaxation, hypnosis.

So I was like, wow, that's just on Google. So the actual podcasts themselves are found. But I don't know.

I don't know. I just think it's, well, that's weird. Okay.

Relaxation for stress and anxiety, and it clicks follow. I'll click follow. And you can get updates on topics that you follow.

Okay. Okay. So the Apple, it's got the podcast Apple relaxation for stress and anxiety.

Then Playcast, no, Play Acast, Spreaker, Spotify, TuneIn, Podimo, Podnews, Podbay. Wow. So I guess I am being found on Google.

So I found that interesting. Someone puts in just hypnosis podcast. Can you hear it in the background? I'll tell you what I think he's done.

He's got so much in his mouth. I think he's struggling to breathe. But he's choosing to do that.

You know, he doesn't have to. He's choosing to pack his mouth full of slipper. I'm going to just check on him.

So I just checked up on Andre. And here's what happened. I bent over.

Don't worry, it's not x-rayed. I just dropped my glasses on the floor, picked them up, just checked Andre was okay. Because it looked like he'd got plastic wrap around his neck, but he didn't.

He was just cozied up to the bubble wrap. So I go, I sit back down to put the microphone on. The microphone, the little, so I've got this lapel microphone, and it's got a little bubbly head, like a microphone head, you know, you have on big microphones, but it's a tiny little version.

I guess it's, I forget the name, a clip remover or something, you know, to try and stop the hissing and whatever as people talk. Doesn't seem to work with me. But anyway, I couldn't find it.

Could not find it anywhere. So what I did, luckily, I've got another one. I've got a spare, which I got, hoping it was part of my plan to transcribe the recording as I recorded it.

So I was going to put two different microphones on my lapel at the same time. However, that one didn't fit into the, didn't fit into the iPhone, the iPad. So it all kind of just didn't go right.

And then when I did it on the iPhone, it just wasn't working. It just wouldn't, it just didn't work. It kept cutting out and everything.

I did it, I actually did a recording while I was doing it. And I just gave up in the end. I never give up, but I gave up then.

And that's something also that could help me with my Google ratings and to get found if I did transcripts of my recordings. So kind of thinking, hmm, how do you transcribe 1800 recordings without your head exploding? You know what I mean? That is years of work. That's going to take absolutely yonks.

But I guess I could do like an abbreviation. I could skip through a recording, fast forward and just like pick out little bits and say, well, during this recording, I discuss holes in the underpants and carrying a chocolate suitcase and, you know, whatever different things that I might have mumbled on about over the years. So maybe I'll do that.

Maybe. But anyway, what I found out is, oops. Anyway, I found out that my recordings, the digital recordings I do, do not have all the information that's needed for Google for the individual podcast sessions to be read, to be recognized by Google.

The podcasts themselves are, but not the actual episodes so much. I mean, they are, they're recognized, but not as much as they could be. And in order to do that, it's this whole, I think it's called ID2, something like that, or ID3.

So I went online and researched it and I thought, oh, oh, I couldn't be, I just thought, no, I can't be bothered with all this. But then yesterday I thought, yeah, okay, I'll have a look. I'll have a look.

I've watched enough YouTube videos, done enough research to kind of know what I'm doing. And when I do make an audio, digital audio, I already put a bit of information in, you know, sort of who I am, the name of the recording, the date, or the name of the recording also always has the date in now anyway, on all of my stuff, generally. And I put the year, and I put basic stuff, but the things that were missing was the information bit.

So first saying, this is number 233 in my Deep Sleep Whisper hypnosis podcast. Please only listen when you could safely close your eyes. This is recorded by hypnotist and podcaster, Jason Newland.

So that's what I put his information, just very basic, to the point. Why does he have to do that right now? Can you hear him? God, I bet he's going to be knocking on my door. Can you keep, can you, can you keep the noise down, please? It's not me, it's my ferret.

I can't put him in the cage because he can't get up and down the ramp, although he probably would be able to. I don't know if I'm giving him enough credit there. I think he's now scratching at the front door.

Yeah, great. Anyway, and the other thing that I've had missing from my podcast recordings, the actual digital files themselves, has been the image, the artwork. So what I've been doing is going through the Deep Sleep Whisper hypnosis ones first.

And again, there's like 240 of those. So it's quite a, quite a big task. Can you hear him in the background? I'm thinking neighbors might think, oh, all he does upstairs, he just sits there crinkling in carrier bags all night long.

It sounds like he's climbing through some big plastic tube. And I don't know what he's doing with that slipper. Anyway, I'm not answering the door, even if someone does knock.

I think my friend said, I won't tell you everything he said to me, but unless it's someone with, let's say, a big bag of cash, why answer the door? That's what he said, because I used to have someone knock on the door, constantly trying to borrow money. And he never paid it back. He hasn't asked me for a while, which is good.

But he's never paid it back. And it was just getting a problem. It's like continuously, can I borrow money? Can I borrow money? I don't know why I did it.

But hey, we learn. We're supposed to learn, aren't we? That's kind of part of the process. But I wonder how much I do actually learn.

I must be able to learn something. And as I'm going through the Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis podcasts, one by one, putting, making new images for each one, redoing them, re-editing each individual digital file, as far as the information goes. So putting in the information, and then adding the artwork, saving it.

And I'm doing this in iTunes. And then I move it from iTunes onto my desktop, put it into a folder that I've got for all the ones that I've done. Then I go to Spreaker.

And I basically change the file. So whatever the file was before, it doesn't change the stats, doesn't change anything. All it does is it just changed the actual digital file.

So let's say it's 218. I go in there, I click Update File or whatever, I forget what it's called, click that button. And then it takes me to where I want to go on the desktop, you know, and I go to the file, the folder, click on number 218.

And it updates it. And then I go back and I see that it's updated it with the new picture. And all the new information.

Yes, I'm yet to find out how useful this is going to be. So it's cool. I just, I might as well tick all the boxes, you know, if I'm going to do this, I might as well do everything I can to make it the best possible, give it the best possible chance.

Because I think unlike, well, not unlike really, because I was one of the first hypnotists on YouTube. But I didn't really, you know, what, 2007, I think, on YouTube, before that was Myspace. And then I was so sporadic, you know, I'd upload videos, and I'd get rid of the channel, then I'd do another one.

And this wasn't consistent with keeping to the same channel. Until I think 2011, I really put a lot of work into the channel and uploaded lots. And, you know, it became more popular.

Because I've had that channel for about two years. And anyway, that but I didn't kind of keep going with that I didn't I got rid of that channel as well. But I can also say that I'm one of the first, I'm one of the original podcasters.

Because I've been podcasting since, again, 2007. 13 years I've been podcasting. And it's it had, it had a bit of an explosion of interest.

Back in, you know, about that time, to those loads of podcast hosts free and everything. And then a lot of them closed down. And my my podcast was quite popular.

I think I had 100,000 downloads on my podcast in within a few months. And then it got closed down. I was getting 1000s 1000s of downloads every day.

So I was, you know, really happy. And then they just shut. And I was thinking, well, I'll pay you, I'll pay you just please keep open.

But they didn't. And then things have changed. You know, it's like everything sort of changed.

And I've been lots of different podcasts. And I kind of ended up staying with the two main ones I stayed with was Podomatic. And what's it called? I forgot.

I forgot the name of it. It's orange. It's got an orange logo.

It's it it is. This is weird. Okay, I'll have to Google it.

Sorry, my brain's not working to its full capacity today. There was a reason for that. It's because I'm me, it's because of me.

podcast hosts begins with S. Let's see if I just put S anchor. Okay, that's not the one. SoundCloud.

That's the SoundCloud. I've been on sound. Well, I'm not on there now.

But I was on SoundCloud for years and years and years and years, and years and years and years. And I'd have I kept this. I had this period where I just kept deleting it.

Maybe I couldn't afford it or didn't want to do it anymore. I wanted to try a different podcast host. And I've tried out loads and loads.

And I just kept sort of, I mean, the last two, last two SoundCloud podcasts that I had, that were, I mean, I've had a few since then as well, actually. But the last two that were only two that were really quite fairly popular-ish. One had 100,000 downloads or plays.

And the second one had over 220,000, I think. So it grew. But there's, I don't know, there's something about, like with SoundCloud, when I go on there, and I've opened up some new channels lately.

I've, but I've kind of got rid of them. So I think I'll just stick with, just stick with what I know, stick with Spreaker. It's doing its job.

It's definitely, I like, I like the way they do things. And when I joined SoundCloud, I get bombarded with people offering to get me more listens, you know, to kind of share my listens. And I used to get that kind of stuff on MySpace.

There used to be quite a lot of that on MySpace. We can get you friends, we can get you 50,000 friends, or 10,000 friends, just pay $50. And, you know, there used to be these different downloads that you could get, which I guess, in a sense, were kind of like apps, but apps, I don't think they really existed back then, but not in the way that they do now.

But, you know, I'm talking MySpace 2007. And that was before, that was before the iPhone, wasn't it? It was the, was the iPhone 2009. I don't know, maybe it was earlier than that.

Anyway, I, I don't really, I'm not really a big fan of all that, you know, we can get you more views. I just want real people to be listening to me. There's, you know, there's no point, what's the point in me having 10,000 followers on my podcasts, if I'm only getting, you know, 30 or 40 views or listens? There's no point.

And most people that listen to me don't even subscribe to the podcast. Or maybe they do. And there's so many different places to listen.

So maybe everyone's spread out listening. Some people listen on Castbox. Some people listen on Stitcher.

Some people listen on TuneIn. Some people listen on Spotify, iTunes, podcasts. Some people listen on Spreaker, some people listen on my website, as well as all the other lots of different podcasts that you can download.

I've got every single podcast app that you can get. Seriously, I've got more downloaded, I can read them to you. Let me have a look.

So let's get out of this. Let me tell you, let me tell you, have a quick drink. I mean, this might not be all of them.

But I think it is. It's all the ones I could find on the app store. But you know, I guess if I searched in a different way, maybe I'd find more.

So here we go. You've got Castbox, Fractus, Global Player. But Global Player is for real professional, big podcasters.

I wouldn't be able to get on there. Then you've got Google Podcasts. Then you've got Overcast, Otter.

I think that's it might be something else. I think that's that Otter. You've got Podcast App.

It's quite a good name for it. You got, okay, I don't think they are. You got Player FM, Radio Player, Acast, RSS Radio, Pocket Casts, Pods, Music Download, Anchor, Podcasts App, Deezer, Podcast One, Tuner Radio Plus, Podomatic, Podcast Plus One, Podster, UK Radios, Spreaker, Stitcher, HiCast, MB3, Audiobooks, TuneIn Radio, Himalaya, Castro, Play Music, Radio Air, Podcast Nine, MyTuner Radio.

Is this one just called a radio? There's more. There's more. Breaker, Speechify, Radio France, Headliner, Mixcloud, Luminary, Soundcloud, Audio Mac, Radio.net, Radio Public, M Gami, Geo7, Bullhorn, Owltail, iVoox, Listen, Capsule, Procast, Desi Radio, Audisibel, Just Listen, Radio Online, Heart, Untitled Podcasts, Expodition, Radio Paradise, PodSkills, Storyo, Storyo, Talk, Town, Listen App, and lastly, Psyched.

So I spent quite a while going through trying to find every single podcast app on the App Store. This is the Apple App Store. Now, I've no doubt there's going to be other ones on the Android App Store, which I can look on this tablet.

So I can do that as well. And part of the reason for this is a lot of the podcast apps that you can download on your phone or whatever, let's say CastBox, for example, they will take, they will take the feed from iTunes. So you haven't got, you don't need to submit your podcast feed to the actual podcast player.

But not all of them do it. Not all of them do it. So I'm, well, I was in the process of going through all of them to make sure that I'm on, that I'm on every single one.

And to submit my stuff to those that aren't on there. So yes, it's a, it's a big, I mean, technically, that's not that many, but it's quite a few. I mean, it's got, I must have read out about 50, surely, in that time, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

Yeah, it must be 50, at least 50, maybe 60 or 70. I don't know. Quite a few.

And iTunes, or Apple podcasts are the top. They're the top by, okay, I'm only gauging by my own statistics. I mean, Spotify is brilliant as well.

And so they're the two top, according to my research online. Again, I don't want to say anything bad against any of them, because I love them all. Because they're letting people play my recordings.

So whether it's Stitcher, TuneIn, CastBox, Spreaker, iTunes, Spotify, whoever it is, love your baby. You know, if they're showing, if they're playing my stuff, then brilliant. They're making it available.

Then that's great. However, there are those at the top. And it's no surprise that anything that's connected to iTunes, and it's going to be massive, isn't it? You know, because it's huge.

It's always been the leader. I suppose, what was it called? Not Snapchat. What's that thing, that sharing thing that got banned, but it was massive back in the 2000s.

And I never used it because at the time, I was, I didn't have, I was just, I had CDs. You know, the only things I really wanted to download, I did download some stuff to my mp3 player. So I used to have, this is back in 2008, I think, January.

I bought an Apple iPod, as opposed to a coconut iPod. I don't know. I don't know why I said the word Apple, but I bought an iPod.

And it had 250 gigabytes of data space, which is huge. I mean, 250 gigabytes is absolutely massive for a podcast, for an iPod for music, because each song doesn't take up very much space. So because I had these CDs, I started to download stuff that I had CDs.

I mean, I could copy it, put it into the CD, copy and transfer onto the iPod, and everything like that. So it's kind of, I ended up getting a collection on there. But I had a huge collection of hypnosis trainings that I got from various places.

And it's like, it's one of my most used things. You know, I used to, apart from the cucumber, because I always like, it's something about the wateriness of a cucumber. It can really, because cheese sandwiches can be a bit dry, can't they sometimes? A nice bit of cucumber can really cheer up a cheese sandwich, make it delightful.

And I remember sort of waiting for the trains and stuff. And I'd be listening to my podcast on my iPod. Oh, it's brilliant.

I loved it. I really did. I'd just be listening to all my different hypnosis trainings and stuff that I'd be listening to.

Beautiful, having everything in one place. The battery life was brilliant as well. Even the, it took me a little while to get used to the little navigation thing in the middle, the little circle thing.

But it was cool. I had videos on there and everything. And one day I chucked it in the bin.

A bit silly. I had so much stuff on there. Really, just a ton of a wealth of knowledge that was on there that I'd collected.

And yeah, I lost it. And I hope that some of it is retained within my brain. I hope.

I hope so. It's hard to tell. Hard to tell.

I don't know. Yeah, so that's what I did. That is what I'm trying to think.

What else? So I'm trying to just look at how I can improve the podcasting from an SEO perspective. For those who don't know what that means, it means SEO, as in you sow the seeds into the internet and it grows into something wonderful. Or it might be search engine, search engine, not organization, something like that anyway.

Operational search engine. It's basically doing whatever you need to do so that Google can find you. Not only Google, but no one.

Does anyone use any other search engines? Put your hands up. For about a month, I've been using Bing. I don't anymore.

But for a month, basically, Internet Explorer is just no good for what I do. It's just, it's not compatible for a lot of things I do. So I've had to use Chrome to keep going back to Chrome.

Because I reset my whole computer, whole laptop to factory settings, because it kept shutting off and it wouldn't work at all. And when it came back on, it automatically started from scratch with Internet Explorer. So I said, I'll just use that, I don't care.

But it just, you know, Bing kept coming up whenever I turned the internet on. And I started getting used to it, because it does have like a few of the headline stories and stuff. But it's just, I mean, the search engine is weird.

I mean, one of the things you can do is on Bing, you can take a picture of yourself, and you can find other things that look like you in their search engine. Now, I don't know, I'm sure there's probably a good way to use that. But I don't know what it is.

See, I don't know where, I must have Bing somewhere on my, I must have because I've used it. Bing, where's Bing? Bing, because I took a picture of myself and searched. Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing.

Where are you? You, you, you, you. Bing, come on. Bing, Bing.

That's strange. I wonder why it's not there. Yeah, I definitely did.

So you can search. Bing. Oh, anyway, I don't know why I can't.

Perhaps, perhaps I imagined it. There's definitely some Bing you can take a picture. But the thing is, I wouldn't have done it on anything else other than my phone.

So why isn't it on here? It couldn't be on the iPad because the two are connected. So anything that's on one is on the other. I don't understand it.

Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing. My eyes are not suited for phone screens, seriously. I know that the phones are amazing.

And it's absolutely phenomenal. The power and what can be done and the information that can be found. It's just, it's amazing.

But it's a small screen. And I'm not, I'm better with a big screen. Why can't I find Bing? Clips, Gmail, Drive, Skype, Udemy, Zoom.

Oh, Bing, found it. It was there all along. News just for you faster.

Get the latest on the stories that matter to you with news notification. Not now. Thank you very much.

So on Bing, unless you've, you might know, but it's got a big magnifying glass in the middle. The left hand side is a picture of a camera. The right hand side is a microphone.

So with the camera, I'm going to turn the volume down just to turn this around. I might have done this. I think I've done this before, but for some reason, and as I'm facing it towards me, it's outlining my eyes with like this blue thing.

So I'm taking a picture. And honestly, the pictures of people that it's coming up with are massive, weird beards. And I tell you what I don't like about it.

I'm not even joking. Similar images. 123456.

Nearly all of them are people that have been arrested. Tell you what's really weird, though. There's someone on here that does look like me.

But he's like a better looking version. He's got a lovely face. He's just, yeah, it's what I could look like if I were to look different.

I thought I'd look like him, I suppose. How weird. It's just like all inmates, people that are in prison.

It's like, come on, I don't really look like that. Maybe I need to shave, have a shave. It's amazing.

There are a few people that look, oh, I found myself. Number 68, Let Me Bore You To Sleep, live on Facebook. Wow.

Isn't that strange? I don't know. I don't know what to say about that. It's just, I've only got some people that don't have.

This is great. There's a YouTube video comes up, telling you how to deal with really rubbish skin. That's lovely, isn't it? Just put my picture in.

And they're saying to get treatment for this. Yeah, lovely. Cheers.

Wonderful. Oh, wow. What on earth? Wow.

I'm actually watching this video. I don't know. I'm confused.

So that's great. Oh, this is a nice looking bloke there. He looks a bit like me, but he's younger and got a happier face.

Well, now to see someone that's really miserable. Oh, wait, that's me. No, it's not.

I just found someone that does look like me. Oh my goodness. This is ridiculous.

Wow. Wow. That's ridiculous.

He looks like me. Seriously. I think I can't open the picture because it takes me to a different thing.

Takes me to a Tumblr page. All I want to do is look at his picture, which might sound like an unusual thing to want, but he looks like me. Like a younger version with a beard that got nicer eyes though.

Unless it is me. No, I don't think it's me. It's weird.

It's not me, but he does look like me. He's got the same kind of hair, but it's receded more than mine. Although mine's got the same ears.

Well, not the same ears, obviously, but sort of similar. Isn't that weird? It could actually be me and it's not me, but like a younger version. Let's see if there's any others.

No, there's none of us. I'm going to put no for them being useful. I'm going to take another picture of myself.

I do want to smile in. Let's see what comes up there. Oh, well, the pictures are more cheerful.

Still people from, still in prison though. Just cheerful inmates. Oh, look.

Picture of me. 30 day hypnosis relaxation plan. Oh, that's from a long time ago.

I look rough. Now, my beard. Wow.

Oh, some of the same people have come up. I wonder where. Wow.

I'm thinking I might need to get rid of my beard. I think it's not. Oh, I've got another one from YouTube.

Natural. Natural. I don't know.

Hit Jason Newland's natural sleep or whatever. How strange. I've also got Jude Law has come up.

So I don't mind that. I always thought that I had to be like Jude Law. When I first saw him on telly, I thought, wow.

Who's replaced a screen for a mirror? Who else? Oh, that's it. No. I've got to stop doing that.

It's not useful. Mind you, if I stopped doing everything that wasn't useful, what would I do? What would I spend my time doing? I wonder why, why, why, why, why, why. Why, why, why, why, why.

She went away and I wonder where she will stay. My lid will burn away. Burn away.

Yeah. Oh, he's now running around so I'm going to go. So he's now banging against the radiator.

The tubes that connect the radiator that go around the wall, just the tubes, not the actual radiator itself. Oh God, he's done a poo right under my chair. And he sleeps right near the tubes that are on the wall, behind the door.

So he bangs it every time he walks into the, goes behind the door. When I say bangs it, he bangs against it. I suppose I should say Happy Father's Day to all those daddies out there.

Isn't that weird? It's a Father's Day, so happy if my, if my actual biological father's out there. And Happy Father's Day, and if you're rich, can you please get in contact? You owe me birthday presents, 40, 49 years of birthday and Christmas presents. Anyway, I'm going to go, so thank you very much, everybody, and I will probably, probably return tomorrow.

So have a great Sunday, wherever you are, or great Monday, or whatever day you're listening to this. Remember to be kind to yourself, because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love.

Bye.