#253 Let me bore you to sleep - Jason Newland (12th November 2019)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. Andre is having his dinner in the background, chomping away. You might be able to hear him just about.

He's worked up a hunger. I'm not going to go into details but he's been very active for the last hour or so. And now he's hungry so he's eating his dinner.

I think it's date night for him. And yeah, only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes. This is Let Me Bore You To Sleep.

The point behind this is that I just talk about whatever for about an hour. And it's boring and it's calm, relaxing and you can just drift off to sleep. That really is it.

I've made quite a few of them, of these podcasts. 252 I think so far. So it's quite a lot.

I've also got other podcasts, Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis and Sleep Hypnosis Weekly. I've got another podcast called Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety and Panic Attacks. Other podcasts for smoking.

Another podcast for self-development. Another podcast for chronic pain relief. So there's quite a few different ones available.

To choose from. And everything that I do is available on my website, jasonnewland.com, including a testimonial page where you can read what other people have written about me. And you could write something yourself if you fancy it.

And there's a page there where you can support me as well. So yeah, that's kind of everything. So today, I'm going to undo my zip.

It's for my jacket or my top. That's it. If it was my fly, that'd be a long fly, wouldn't it? Imagine that.

I'm just going to undo my flies. That's an impressive fly, isn't it? Anyway, Andre's... So I don't think Andre knows what to do because I've been moving stuff around and he doesn't like it. He just looked at me, he knows I'm talking about him.

I've moved his tube that he likes to climb through. And I've put my abdominal board in its place. And now he's sniffing around that and he's a little bit confused.

Where's my stuff? Where's my tube gone? But I put the other side of the room because I'm trying to tidy this place up. And instead of doing it all in one go, I'm just doing it in bits. Each day, I do a bit more.

Each day, I do it tidy a bit more, which is kind of what I've been doing. So today, I put a few bits into the storage cupboard. And a set of drawers, not drawers, a bookcase that has to be put together.

But I just... The bits of wood was standing up in the bedroom, not on their own. They don't have legs. They're not alive, but they were... And Andre was trying to push them over.

And they were heavy, heavy bits of wood, heavy shelving. So I didn't want them to... Well, first of all, it'd make quite a bit of noise if I'm in bed, but also didn't want it landing on him. So he was determined to push... He was determined to push them over.

So I put them into the storage cupboard so he can't get to them. I put the vacuum cleaner in there. But I've done a bit of tidying up, which is good.

I mean, yesterday, I'm not sure if I mentioned it during... I don't even know if I did a recording yesterday. I let me boy to sleep. Well, I don't think I did.

I'm not sure. But my light... I think it was Friday. My light bulb went again.

Do you remember at the beginning when I told you that I talk about boring stuff? I'm not joking. It was no joke. I really do talk about boring stuff.

And those of you that have got in contact with me can also vouch that I'm really boring. It's pretty... I really am this boring. I'm not.

There are no hidden depths. It's all on show. So you can never really be disappointed because I announce myself before I enter the room kind of all my boringness.

So the light bulb went in the living room again on Friday. So I changed it and as I was changing it, the whole thing just came out. The whole kind of, excuse me, the light socket came out and it was just leaving these metal bits that were there and I thought, ooh, don't want to go near that.

I phoned the council. I said, do you change light bulbs? And they say, no. I said, well, it's not really a light bulb.

It's the light fitting has come apart and I'm not an electrician and I don't want to touch it. And she said, well, we'll send someone around and put it down as an emergency. I said, I'm not sure if it really should be an emergency.

I do have a lamp, like a quite bright lamp that I can use. I left it there. So I was just expecting someone to come around, but no one did.

No one came around Saturday. No one came around Sunday. No one's been around today either.

So yesterday, which was Sunday, bearing in mind it's now, it needs the lights on by about four, possibly earlier now, indoors. It's lighter outside than inside at three o'clock. And I like to see things.

I don't know if that makes sense. See, I wear glasses for distance, but not just distant distance, but even the television that's, I don't know, six foot away from me. I need my glasses to read the subtitles.

Six foot, maybe seven foot. I don't know. It's hard to tell.

I can't, I feel like I should measure it, but I don't have my measuring stick. So having the lights off, no light and just the television, it's a little bit of a strain on my eyes. I like to have a light on in the room.

I never just, never just watch the television without any lights. Also, I don't generally just sit here watching television. I do other things at the same time.

So I'll be, maybe I'll be playing with my phone. I'll be on the laptop, you know, just doing, just fiddling around, you know, maybe with the website or doing a little bit of research and stuff like that, you know. So yesterday, when the light bulb went, so was it Friday? So Friday night, Saturday and Sunday, I had my lamp, which was fine.

And then I turned it off. I turned it off because there was this weird light on the, shining against the front door. I figured it was the lamp because there's nothing else it could have been.

But I just wanted to see, because it just looked a bit strange. And it'd been intriguing me for the last few days, on and off for short periods of time. So I turned it off and the light wasn't there anymore on the front door.

Bearing in mind, I'm in the living room. I'm not really anywhere near the front door, unless you class seven footsteps as being near, but, you know, it's not near, near. It's not, it's near if you're looking at the map of a world, it's very close.

But so I thought, oh, okay, that must be what it was. Then I went to turn the light on again, and the bulb went. I thought it might be the socket.

I thought it might have blown a fuse or might have short circuited something. So I went into the storage cupboard or the storage room rather, and had a look at the electricity thing. Nothing had been tripped.

So that was all fine. So I'm just sitting here in darkness. And this was a bout, what about eight o'clock, seven, seven o'clock, eight o'clock at night.

And I had the television on. And I had my laptop on. And although technically, I mean, there's electricity was still on.

So I could still use my laptop. But I couldn't see, couldn't see the keyboard. I could see it, I knew it was there.

You know, I was aware of its presence. I don't know. I knew, you know, I knew the keyboard was there, just like turn the light off.

I know there's a ceiling there. Can't see it. So I knew it was there.

Plus, I could put my hands on it. Not the ceiling, the keyboard of the laptop. So it was really, and I can't read, although I do, I can read.

I mean, I've got a Kindle. But even it's, it's the very basic Kindle. It's not one of the fire ones.

I used to have one of those, but it broke, believe it or not. I don't know what the hell happened. It just broke.

So I've got a Kindle. And it's the very basic paperweight one, you know, but I need a light behind me in order to read it. Or a light above me in order to sort of read it properly, without straining my eyes.

So I'm thinking, oh, what am I going to do? Because it's too early for me to go to bed. I don't think a light bulb going should be a reason for the day to end, you know. But I do have, I've had a few issues with light bulbs over the years.

So what I did is, I phoned my friend up. He's a neighbour. And I said, can I come down for five minutes? I need to speak to you.

He said, yeah. Came down. Well, I went and visited him.

Knocked on the door. He answered the door. And I said, my light's gone.

The bulb's gone on my light. The electrician hasn't turned up to fix this socket of the electrical appliance that the bulb fits into, you know, in the ceiling. He said, you mean the light socket? I said, yeah, yeah.

The, you know, the dangly thing, a bit like a, like one tonsil kind of dangling. Not really, like a, I suppose a tonsil, if it was a light bulb. I don't know.

And he said, yeah, you're getting off track a little bit. So you've got no light. I said, yeah.

I said, have you got a light I can borrow, like a lamp? And he said, yeah, you can borrow this one. So normally he, he has that lamp and he doesn't have the main light on. So I was kind of, I was inconveniencing him.

But he, you know, he's fine about it. So I borrowed that lamp and I said, it's one of the stand up ones. It doesn't tell jokes.

It just, you know, it's, it has a little stand at the bottom. Well, it's quite a big stand really, but, and it supports the, the rail that goes up. And then there was a light bulb and a, like this metal lampshade thing.

And so I borrowed that. I said, I'm going to bring it back tomorrow. And then I brought it up.

I plugged it in. I plugged it in first of all, the other side of the room. But then that was just, I mean, it was very, um, dim, very dim, not very bright at all.

Because the lampshade is metal. I mean, there's holes in the metal. Otherwise it wouldn't have been no light at all, would there? It'd be pointless.

It's certainly ridiculous, isn't it? A light bulb inside a metal box. That's a lovely lampshade, I think. I have to turn the main light on so I can have a look, get my torch out.

So I turned that on, but it was, I still couldn't see the keyboard. Or I could see the keyboard. I could see the shape, the outline, but not the numbers and the letters.

And I am fairly competent at typing. Not like with speed, but with a degree of accuracy. So my fingers managed to find the correct letters without needing to look at the keyboard sometimes, which, yeah, I think that's quite cool, actually.

I never formally learned to type, but I have been typing on keyboards for many, many years. I haven't used computers at work and typing in information continuously all day, every day for years and years. So I'm not at that level anymore.

I don't type as quickly as I used to because I don't need to. And I don't do much typing other than searching or a lot of copying and pasting and, you know, stuff like that, you know, when it comes to website or posting podcasts and stuff as such. And the only thing is when it's dark, sometimes, because I did test it, I tested it, and I thought maybe I can do it from feel, from feel alone, because I'm pretty good with my fingers, quite good at finding the right places.

As I said, and especially my name, I can do that. But then I've typed my name in so many times, searching for it on Google, you know. And it's okay because it comes up on the screen.

So I'm looking at the screen and just typing. It's okay when it works. So when the letters click properly and everything's fine.

But then there's a problem if it doesn't, because then I've got to try and find the correct words or the correct letter. That's when it gets a little bit more tricky. It's a little bit like trying to eat a cactus with a smile on your face, but it's probably not anything like that.

It's a little bit awkward. It's a little bit you know. So the lamp that my friend lent me was the other side of the room.

It wasn't the other side of the room. I don't live in the mansion. You know, it wasn't like, oh, let me get my binoculars out so I can see where I put it.

You know, I could see it. Even with my eyesight, I could see it. I mean, my eyesight isn't that bad.

It's not. I haven't got like really thick glasses that are magnified. You know, I'm not walking around in the summer setting trees on fire or something, you know, from the sun rays.

I'm not, they're not that bad. They're just, they're just, my eyesight is just not as good as it used to be. And yeah, it's just, I don't really care really.

It's weird. I don't, I must have a different way of thinking, maybe in some ways, but I don't expect to be able to do now what I could do, everything I could do 20 years ago. I don't, why should I, why should my eyesight be exactly the same as it was when I was 30 or 20? Oh my God, 30 is nearly 20 years ago.

Yeah, let's move on from that. See, I don't mind. I'm 49 and I do mind.

I really do. But I pretend I don't mind. It doesn't really hit home until I think that 20 years ago I was just coming up to being 30 or I was 29.

20 years ago, 30 years ago, I was 19. 40 years ago, I was nine. So how many months is it before I'm 50? I'm 50 at the end of August.

So it's now, let's say end of October. So it's not because it's now the 11th of November. I think, or 12th of November.

The 12th, let's say the end of November for argument's sake. December, January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August. So it's nine months.

So basically, 50 years ago, I was swimming around with all me millions of brothers and sisters, and completely oblivious to what was about to happen. I had two brothers on the outside, but I was still on the inside. I was on the inside with my millions and billions of other brothers and sisters.

And isn't it weird, you think about it, how many of you, how many, the possibilities of you or me actually being born out of making it to the to the Filipino tube. It's like, how do you, you know what I mean? There's like millions, I don't know if it's billions, but millions and millions of you know, little, what I call them to school, it was little fishes, little fishes with tails, little tadpoles, all swimming. I've got a mild, let's say that you can kind of remember, you know, with hypnosis, sometimes you can do past life regression, or, you know, I'm not really into that.

I've never done it really. I've never done it with someone and never would. Because I'm more, my hypnosis, my hypnosis, the kind of hypnosis that I do, is based more on, we're trying to help people in the way that I do, if that makes sense.

I realized that people that maybe do the past life regression, giantly helped by it. Do you like that wording, that giantly helped? I've got a friend, a really, um, one of the people that I respect most in the world, is called Gunasara. And he's a Buddhist, he's a, he's a ordained Buddhist.

And he's, he's phenomenal. He's a phenomenal person. Like he's just, I tell him he's got more wisdom in his little willy than I'll ever have, you know, in my whole life.

He's just, I just said I respected him, but I do. He's an amazing, amazing person. And there was a reason why I'm telling you about this amazing person and I've completely forgotten.

That's something to do with sperm. I don't know. No, that doesn't make sense.

Oh no, he had past life regression and he told me about it and he found it really useful. This is a long, long time ago. So, and I suppose it fits together with the Buddhists belief system, in a sense of past lives being reborn, sort of rebirth.

Yeah. I've got this, this little nagging memory that I was swimming towards the, well I think onion bhaji, but I was swimming towards whatever, the place I was supposed to be swimming towards. And I changed my mind, as I'm likely to do.

I'm quite a mind changer. And I've caused so many problems in my life. I've, so I was dating someone recently and she's the most amazing person.

And it was very brief, the dating. I got to know her a little bit before we actually sort of kind of got together. And she was amazing in every single way possible.

You know, just absolutely lovely person. And then I sent her a text saying, I'm not ready for a relationship. And as soon as I sent it, I regret sending it.

Like I made that decision and then I changed my mind. And I suppose in a way I didn't feel ready. But it was like, why didn't I just keep quiet and just see how it goes, you know? So I'm, you know, I remember years ago when I was in Wales, I didn't live in Wales.

I wasn't inside a whale. I'm talking about the town, well, the country. So I don't know if anyone's never, if anyone's never been to Wales, and let's say you're abroad, you're living in America or Canada or Australia, and you've never been to Wales, then if you ever get a chance, visit.

So if you ever come to this part of the world, you know, Europe, or if you go to, come to England, Scotland or somewhere like that, it is a distance. It's a traveling distance. But I think people that live in England and the UK, they have a different grasp of distance to what people in America have or someone in Australia.

Because in America, it's such a massive country that you can meet up with a friend for a night out or for the weekend and you get a plane to where they are. Or you travel for like seven hours to visit your family for the day or for the evening or whatever. Because it's the big distance.

Here, if you have to travel for more than an hour, that's a long way. It's for us, well, for me, especially I walk. So an hour of walking really does give me sore tootsies.

So I kind of, I have traveled long distances, kind of. But I suppose the longest distance, as we're talking about it, apart from to Ireland, also to the Isle of Man. But this is kind of, it's because of the where you go from.

See, when I went to the Isle of Man in 2004, it was the last time I ever went anywhere or had any kind of a holiday with a family, with family members. And it was also the first time since the age of probably 14 that I'd ever been on holiday with family members. So 2004, I was 33 when I went away to the Isle of Man.

So I was at 14, 24, yes, nearly 20 years between the last time I was on holiday with my dad and the second time I was on holiday with my dad. And I've always thought if I ever did come into some money, like a lottery win or, you know, sort of, I'd like to go on a cruise and take my parents on a cruise, and maybe the family, and kind of would like to not go, but maybe go, but get a room on the other side of the ship. Just so I can hide.

But I think it'd be really nice because my dad likes, loves going on cruises now. He's retired and he deserves it. He worked really hard all his life, right the way up to, but he still does work.

Not work, work, but he's always doing stuff. He's always doing stuff for the family and working on the house, you know, all that stuff. Because he's an electrician, well he was an electrician, and, but he could pretty much do anything.

Apart from ballet, I don't see him in a tutu. Well, I've never seen him in a tutu, doesn't mean he's never worn one. I don't really, I don't want to get that image out of my head, but I think it'd be really nice to go and take them on a cruise.

I don't know what kind of cruise, I don't, it'd have to be somewhere where I didn't have to get off the boat if I didn't want to. You know, but like excursions were optional, not like you must get off and visit this castle. We have an orchard to visit, or even a place with apple trees.

Only got no pictures to show me, but I'll do. But, you know, it's, I don't, I'm not a traveller, you know, in the sense of, I don't know, I've never really done much travelling. I never, I dated a girl once.

I did actually have a relationship once with this girl. She was 17, and I was 25, and she was a trainee nurse, and we fell in love and all that stuff. She was way more mature than I was.

She was a traveller, like proper, I say a traveller, she wasn't. I mean, she liked to travel, that's what I mean. And she was half Italian, so she spent, I think because her dad was Italian, and her mum was something else.

And she was half Italian, so it was only, I think it was the top half, I don't know what that means. But she loved travelling, and she spent a lot of time in Italy during the holidays when she was at school. She'd have the summer holidays and all that stuff, and she'd go to Italy.

And she could speak Italian fluently. And I quite liked it when she spoke Italian, because then I didn't have to pretend not to listen. It was quite, ooh.

So I'd love to go back to that time. I kind of like to go back and just revisit the girlfriends, but as they were then, but as I am now, which would be freaky. Do you imagine, do you imagine someone 30 or 20 years older than the person you're dating just turns up, probably think I'm my dad or something, and just say to them, look, I'm sorry.

That's it, and then just walk away. Just say, I'm sorry. I'm just really immature emotionally.

And, but hopefully by the time I'm 49, I'm going to have to say by the time I'm 50 now, because I've kind of clearly proved lately that I'm perhaps still not. But by the time I'm 60, I will be so mature, which will probably be even freakier to them. It's like, why is this bloke telling me this? Why does he look like Jason? Maybe that did happen.

That would explain some of the weird breakups. But I didn't really come on here to talk about relationships. That's why I don't give people relationship advice.

Not that many people ask it, but occasionally people do. And I almost find I want to just tell them to do complete opposite to what I used to do. I think I was a funny boyfriend, and that was it.

That's the only thing that I'd kind of be remembered for. I was probably a bit wacky, a bit very unlike anybody else. Yeah, I suppose that's the only, it's not necessarily a good thing, but no one that I ever dated will ever have dated anyone before or since that was like me, which probably is a good thing for them.

Well, that's a weird noise. Did you hear that buzzing? I think it was a laptop. I'm just going to have a little drink.

I do wonder, you know people say, oh, if I had a time machine, I'd go back and I'd, there's a cliche, you know, there's one cliche that a lot of people say. I won't repeat it because we all know what the cliche is. But I don't think I would do that.

I think if I had a time machine, I think I'd go forward because I'm not really that interested in the past. I know I talk a lot about it, but I can't talk about the future because I don't have a time machine. Well, if I had a time machine, I'd be talking about the stuff that happened or that's going to happen in 17 years time or 25 years time.

I'll be talking about the election results and, you know, I would because it'd be fun. Maybe I should start doing a few special recordings based upon that premise of yeah, I could, couldn't I? I went forward in the time machine. So I don't know why I would do that.

I have to give that a bit of thought. If I had a time machine, there are a few people I'd quite like to meet. Because, you know, there's another cliche that people say, isn't it? It's sort of if you could have a dinner with a bunch of people, who would it be? You know, who would you invite to lunch or who would you invite to dinner? You know, anyone in history, um, however far back in the past, you know, alive or not, you know, who would you invite? Now, I wouldn't want to do a dinner party.

I think I'd quite like to meet the people individually and see what they're really like, not see what they're like in a public setting. Because, you know, this might get out more of a sense of who they are as a person. And so I think the people that I would choose to meet is Malcolm X. Didn't see that coming, did you? Well, the reason for Malcolm X is because I used to read his speeches when I was 20.

I've got a book of his speeches. And I've also listened to them and I bought tapes of them. And of course, with YouTube, you can watch it and stuff, you know, watch the speeches.

But what I found, he was so articulate, also funny, and really got his point across. Without religion or without, you know, any of that, just real human, humanistic kind of stuff. Yeah, I don't know.

I just found him to be fascinating. Who else? Not Genghis Khan, no. Richard Pryor is, I mean, in the comedy world, you know, sort of, he is classed as the top of the tree.

You know, you've got Bruce Lee in the martial arts world, even though he's not been around since 1979 or whatever. And loads of other actors have come along and been more successful, had more successful movies and everything. Bruce Lee is always at the top.

He stayed at the top, the king of Kung Fu. Elvis Presley, plenty of other people have outsold Elvis, made more money than him, that are alive now. Garth Brooks is an example.

But Elvis will always, I still don't know always, but he still is classed as the king, the king of rock and roll, even though he hasn't been around for a long time. So there seems to be like this top bit. And Richard Pryor, even though hundreds, or thousands and thousands, but loads of really brilliant comedians have come along that were possibly equal, if not better than Richard Pryor, but will never get, they will never be classed.

He's almost royalty. Richard Pryor is comedy royalty. It's a bit like Lauren Hardy or Charlie Chaplin, you know, kind of in their, Charlie Chaplin was the king of silent comedy movies.

Oliver and Hardy, is it Oliver? No, Stan, Lauren Hardy, they were the top double act in the old movies. And even though loads of other came after, they still stayed the top. Like in history, they were classed as the greatest.

So that's not why I like Richard Pryor. I liked him because he made me laugh. You know, I didn't even know he did stand up comedy when I was a kid.

I watched him in Silver Streak and Stir Crazy, See No Evil, Hear No Evil, although that was after I discovered him as a stand up. But I saw him in, I watched every single Richard Pryor film that he ever made when I was a kid. And I didn't really know he did stand up.

I did not watch stand up comedy back then. It wasn't available to me. I didn't really discover stand up until I was in my late teens.

It started to be on television and I did know it from being on television when I was a kid. There used to be stand up comedy, but not like adult stand up comedy, you know? Maybe I did see a bit, but I don't recall it. But Richard Pryor, he was in a film called The Toy.

And he basically was, his job was to look after this little kid called Master Bates. And also, yeah, he was in Superman, Superman 3, which I think he, he star, he was the star of that movie. He made that film, what it was.

Obviously, Superman, you know, helped. But I think it really, having him there, Richard Pryor, it, yeah, I can't imagine anyone else doing what he did. But he just was really, really cool.

But anyway, so I quite liked to have met Richard Pryor. I was supposed to be telling you about my light bulbs. This is a light bulb moment then.

I need to tell you about my light bulbs. Let's just finish this bit then. Let's have a look.

Who else would I like to... Jane Mansfield. I'd like to have met, I'd like to meet Jane Mansfield. Who else? Singers.

Terrence Trent Darby is one of my all-time favourite singers. He's just so amazing. What other singers? I'd quite like to have met the lady from the Cranberries.

I mean, she's no longer around, but she's, for me, there is no singing voice that competes with hers. It's just, just, you know, personally, I find it just be perfection. Just absolutely amazing voice.

Just the style of singing, you know. I think I'd like to have met Elvis, but, well, yeah, I would. So I would like to have met him, but probably when he was younger, before he had like all the entourage and he was carrying around guns and, you know, I'd just like to have met him when he was younger and maybe when he was, like, in the movies, you know.

He looked a bit more chilled out then. What other people? Milton Erickson, the, and Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee, of course.

I don't know if I say, of course, but Bruce Lee. And again, you know, Bruce Lee meant quite a lot to me because I had a poster of him on my wall when I was seven. And this was at a time when I'd never had a poster on my wall my entire life.

You know, this is the first time. It was almost the first time I'd lived in a stable home, kind of. So having that picture of Bruce Lee next to me, even though I wasn't old enough to watch the movie, it has an, I have an emotional connection to it.

And I knew that I wanted to do martial arts from a very early age, but I wasn't allowed to because I was too young. And, but I ended up doing it when I was 14, 13, 14. And so Bruce Lee, definitely.

I'd quite like to meet Jackie Chan, just sort of let him know how much I enjoyed his early movies. They just made me laugh. It was so funny.

Those are the ones that he did before he was famous. Yeah, probably in the 70s, maybe the 80s, early 80s. Like Drunken Master and other ones, sort of that kind of thing.

And they were made in China, I think, but dubbed into English, which I like. I prefer that over subtitles, because especially with Jackie Chan films, it's so full of action. I kind of want to watch what he's doing.

I can't do that and read at the same time. I'd quite like to meet the Queen. I know the likelihood of that ever happening is pretty much zero, but I'd like to meet the Queen.

I mean, she is, she's the Queen. And I'd like to meet, I'd like to meet Prince William and Prince Harry, because of their work with mental health. And having watched them grow up, you know, from babies, even though I was very young myself when they were born.

But I've got about 10 years on them, I think. I think I was about 10 when they were born, when Prince William was born. Maybe younger, I don't know.

But I think that would be cool. Keith Floyd, the chef, he seemed like someone that would be really interesting to have met. And there's some people I'd like to meet, not necessarily sit down, but just sort of meet.

Like Big Daddy. He was huge, but he was also a huge star in UK wrestling. And there's lots of sports people that I'd like to meet.

Mainly boxers, if I'm honest. And that list is, that's a very long list of boxers that I'd like, I'd like to meet them all, really. I'd kind of like to be involved in the boxing world.

If I could figure out a way of offering my services to boxers, then I could be involved and I could, you know, be there with them, the boxer before the fight, maybe help with motivation, with maybe some hypnosis or something like that. And just be part of like, you know, these big occasions. I think it would be absolutely amazing.

I'd love that. I'd like to meet a lady from the past called Georgia, who I haven't seen since about 2002. And let's go back to famous people.

There's some people I'd like to meet. I'd like to meet, there's a girl that I was really close to when I was about seven, seven years old. I'd just like to meet her and just say hello, see if she remembers me.

And chances are she won't, but we were really, we got on really well. We used to chase each other around and stuff, pull each other's hair, you know, it was love, obviously. There's other people as well, but Sigmund Freud would be an interesting person to meet, and Carl Jung, and Carl Rogers, you know, the people from like the psychotherapy, the origins of those people like Fritz Perls, and people that were mavericks, and sort of created their own style of doing things, their own philosophy.

That'd be interesting. I'm trying to think of who else. I don't see it, really.

There's loads and loads, but I can't think of, I can't really think of many off the top of my hat. So I borrowed the lamp. Eventually, I moved it to behind my desk, my table where I do the, you know, use the laptop, and I was able to see the keyboard.

Once I took the lamp off, because the lamp bit, the lampshade was metal. So I took that off and it was a little bit brighter. And then today, I went out.

Well, last night, rather, I ordered a lamp online with the catalogue, so I can pay it back and, you know, over the next eight months or something. And I've got a few other little bits. And then I went out and I got a little lamp, in case, because I didn't know when the other one was going to turn up.

Plus, I needed to return the other one to my friend. I didn't want to spend another evening without any light. So I got this cheap lamp, but like, you know, a bedside thing.

And I get home, the delivery people still didn't turn up and they haven't turned up at all, all day. And I was looking at the socket, the dangly bit, you know, the electric for the light bit. And I thought, you know what? Let's have a look at this.

Let's see if I can fix it. So I'll make sure it's turned off. So it's not.

Yeah, it's turned off, I think. And I look at it and I figure out that bit goes in the hole. It goes in there.

And there's two holes. And I thought, does it matter which hole it goes in? And so I have flashbacks to when I was like 18. But then, because you know, I've never been much good with light bulbs.

And then I just, I thought, yeah, this makes sense. And I screwed it together. Got a good screw.

And it fitted together perfectly. Put the light bulb in, turned the switch and the light came on. Done.

There was nothing wrong with the lights at all. It was just, it was loose because it had become unscrewed. So what I did is I took my friend's lamp downstairs.

I also gave him the bedside lamp. I said, just to say thank you. Because I've got another lamp coming.

Like a big one that's going to be sort of reaching over my desk. I want those old desk ones that sort of point towards the desk. So that'll be coming probably tomorrow or the day after.

I don't know. And I don't need one for next to my bed because the light switch is literally an arm's length from my bed. And if I was to read, I'd need something a bit stronger than a little lamp.

Because it was, I actually went to Argos and bought it. And the lamp was £6. And I said, I need to get some light bulbs.

And she said, well, I don't recommend getting them here. We've got a terrible supply. A terrible, you know, we're pretty rubbish with our light bulbs.

I thought, oh, that's nice. Nothing like recommending, you know, your own company. And she said, no, if I suggest those, you go to Homebase and go and get some light bulbs there.

And I said, no. I said, no, I refuse. I'm not going back out in that rain.

Not for you. Not for light bulbs. And she said, oh, I don't blame you.

I said, could you please find me some light bulbs that will fit this lamp? And she did. And it worked out being £4 for two. And she said, not very strong, you know.

I said, I don't need it to lift things. I just need it just to be a light. And she said, that's funny.

So I thought, I don't know if that's a real laugh or not, but it was funny. And it did deserve some kind of recognition, but not a fake laugh. But I'll take what I can get.

And just before she went, she handed me a piece of paper, I read it. She said, I love you. And I said, come on, seriously, just leave me alone.

Just trying to buy things. I don't need to be hassled like this. I'm not a piece of meat.

So I went and I sort of paid for it. Well, I paid for it and then I collected it. It was very busy in there.

And so I was giving it to my neighbour to say thank you for letting me borrow his lamp yesterday. And now I've got my lamp, which is nice and bright. I got rid of the lampshade.

So it's even brighter now. It's actually quite cool. I'm almost ridiculously happy about it.

It's so nice. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's not that nice.

I'm going to be groaning, but just I just close my eyes. I feel really relaxed. Really relaxed and calm.

Yeah. Oh, the other thing is, I got an email from the university telling me that the reference has been received from the referee that I gave. And which I think is the last thing that needs to be done.

And this is for the Masters, the MSc in Positive Psychology that I've applied to do, which starts in January. So I just need to wait. I mean, it's not that long away, is it? I'd like to know as soon as possible, just so that I can plan.

Because the journey is about two hours a day, getting there. It's not going to be every day, but I just want to, I need to figure out how many days it's going to be and whether or not I can afford to actually get there, you know, to afford the travel. Because I'll need to travel before nine o'clock or to get there to start at nine or half nine.

So I'll be needing to leave at six or something silly like that. Which means any discount cards are not valid, I think, during peak time. So I'll be paying full fare, which is just concerns me a little bit.

I don't know if it's going to end up costing me £100 a week to travel. Then I'm not going to be able to do the course, even though I've got a student loan for, was it £10,000? But that money goes to the university. It doesn't go to me.

It's a pity I couldn't get a loan for another, like, £2,000 to cover for the travel for the year, or however much it's going to be. But they don't, they don't. They just cover the cost of the university course, you know, the fees.

But yeah, it'll be interesting. I just need to know now. It's Monday, so hopefully, I'm hoping I should know by the end of the week.

Because I enrolled, or I put in my admission form on the 1st of October. And within two weeks, I've been told by the university and the loans company that I'd been accepted for the loan of £10,000. That would be, need to be paid off once I reach a certain amount of money in the future.

And that'd be added on to the undergraduate loan that I got. But you know, I've talked about this in the past. Getting the first degree was like, was like climbing Everest for me.

Getting a master's degree would be like reaching the moon, you know, as far as such a momentous thing for me personally, compared to how I used to think about myself. And then to get a PhD, which were, to follow this analogy, I guess it'd be Mars, wouldn't it? But can you imagine that? Imagine having a master's in positive psychology. How groovy would that be? And it would affect everything I do, not just me personally, my life, and help to increase my own positivity and happiness and stuff.

But I integrate it into what I'm already doing online with these, maybe not these recordings, but some, you know, the recordings I do, which would then help other people, thousands and thousands of other people around the world will benefit from me doing that course, or hopefully will benefit. So it's, it's an exciting opportunity. Yeah, plus, I started to realize that I need to be mentally stimulated.

I've got an active mind. It needs to be stimulated and I don't get a lot of stimulation. And probably not as much as I need, perhaps, I don't know, a bit too much sometimes.

But when I was at one time, when I was hammering in that nail into the wall, I was very stimulating a bit too much. But yeah, anyway, I'm going to go because at least I managed to finish the story about the light bulb. It took me 77 minutes, but I did it.

So thank you for listening to this very, very boring recording. Thank you, all of those of you that leave messages, that leave testimonials, that leave me private messages, such as Melanie, Michelle, Ross, this side, it's gone off, it's been quite a few, actually, the last week or so. And there's another lady, I can't remember your name, but thank you.

I know who you are, but I just can't, my brain's not remembering. I need to have the laptop open for me to look. But I do really appreciate it.

All of you, so thank you. So remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love.

Bye.