#138 Let me bore you to sleep - Jason Newland (28th April 2019)

Hello and welcome to let me bore you to sleep. My name is Bobby McBobby and that's Jason Newland and I'm bored already saying the same thing the beginning of every single recording so please only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes. I do have a specific Facebook page for the let me bore you to sleep just put in let me bore you to sleep into Facebook and the page should come up and that will then give you an opportunity to see every session, I'll post everything on there, every new recording as well as you can post a message to me telling me how you get on with these recordings if they work, if they're useful or you just might want to say hi, that's fine.

Tell me how wonderful I am because I'm ever so needy, oh yeah. So just let you know that it's available, this podcast is available on lots of different podcast hosts like Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Player FM, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, and Spreaker is where it lives, what else, yeah I've also got other sleep podcasts as well, I've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 other, I think, podcasts specifically for sleep and the Sleep Hypnosis Weekly which I've started to add regular sessions weekly now and there was only 7 but I did one yesterday or on Friday so that was 8 and I'll do another one next Friday making it 9 and they last about an hour.

Also I've got the Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis podcast, I genuinely, genuinely, generally produce one recording a day, the same as what I do with these ones now This, yeah, sometimes there's a gap but I try and do one every day.

And the Deep Sleep Whisper ones, that is still the most popular podcast but these Let Me Boy The Sleep are in the race, definitely. So, each of these recordings lasts about an hour, roughly, and it is just me talking about whatever. Some stuff's real, some things are just made up.

It's a mixture of, yeah, I suppose, it's a mixture of pointless facts and pointless lies, kind of. And I'm recording this at 2.29 in the morning on Sunday the, I'm not sure what the date is, I think it's the 28th today of April 2019 or 2019 if that's how you like to pronounce it. What other things do I need to tell you before I proceed? Oh, I did a new recording today, it's on my self-help, self-development podcast and it's called Healing Your Elbow With Hypnosis And it's basically, it was a request from someone called Brooke, my friend, called Brooke.

And it's about 70 minutes long-ish and it's focused very much on the unconscious mind and expectation and wanting something and expecting something. Expecting something to happen and allowing that healing to take place. So I don't want to get too much into that here because this isn't about elbows, but that was.

So if you have any elbow issues, then check it out. I posted it on my Facebook page. But okay, again, if you just Google, if you, if you can't find it anywhere, just Google Hypnose, what's it? Healing Your Elbow and then just put Jason Newland and it'll come up somewhere online.

So, or if you just put in Jason Newland and in a Google search, put it in for the last 24 hours and it'll come up there as well, probably. This room is feeling quite warm compared to how it felt half an hour ago. That's pretty boring.

Yeah. I was thinking, what should I talk about today? And what I thought I'd talk about, because I had my haircut on, I think it was Wednesday night. Yeah.

Wednesday night. And I was thinking about different haircuts I've had and I thought, that's got to be a boring subject. I don't, I don't necessarily normally introduce the particular topic that I'm going to be discussing, but today I am for some reason.

So this is the, the hairstyle haircut session. So I had my hair cut on a Wednesday night and it was, I think like a grade two crew cut. So you know, I'm quite pleased with it.

It's, my friend did it for me and it's all right. It's, I really felt the cold though when I went out because I had a, my hair, it was getting long, really curly. And when it was all on the floor, the thing that I noticed, the thing that jumps out at me, well, nothing jumped out at me, apart from the cockroaches from my hair that had been in my hair all that time.

And nothing, no I didn't really, nothing, it's just the lack of grey hair, especially in the back of my head, or the hair rather. So I'm doing all right really. I'm receding at the front, like at the sides of the front, you know, and there's this like, there's a few different islands, like little islands where you've got a couple of hairs and then there's a sea of skin around.

So they're, you know, they're not all kind of receded together. It's quite weird because it's probably about an inch from where my hairline is now and there's one hair grows. It's just one's kind of stuck in there and not giving up.

So I kind of have to cut that separate. It's weird. It's very strange.

And it's grey, it's a grey one. So before I had my hair cut this time, I had considered, or I genuinely was thinking about doing this, growing my hair long. And my reasoning is this, and I've said this to my friend, and I said it to him too many times because he started getting annoyed with me.

He said, you keep repeating yourself. I said, I know, but it's exciting. And he said, no, it's not.

I said, okay. And my theory is this. There's a lot of men my age that don't have the ability to grow long hair.

They don't have as much hair as I have. I'm not saying that in a kind of, oh great, I've got a hair. But because, you know, I've spent the last, I don't know, nearly 20 years, most of my time, I've been shaving my head, or, you know, getting it really short.

So I've not been making use of having nice hair. Well, not nice hair, but just having the hair, really. So I've kind of shaved my head when I didn't need to.

But I like the idea for maybe just one last little drum roll, you know, as far as just let it grow and enjoy it. Enjoy having all this wonderful wavy hair. But, I don't know, it was a bit too much.

I mean, on top of the back, I quite liked it. And it was curly, and it was past my neck. You know, it's pretty much onto my shoulders, I suppose.

Not much, but it's very, it's curly, very, very curly. And then it was sticking out of the sides, the curliness, the curls. And I was knocking people over in the street, you know, because of, but it's not my fault, is it? And my hair was, I wasn't, but my hair was sticking out.

People were falling off their bikes and stuff. But then on top, my hair was sticking up in all different angles, and I didn't like it. And it was starting to, the novelty was starting to wear off.

You know, it's a little bit like living with a crocodile, you know. Eventually, it's not as exciting as it once was. And it gets a little bit, you know, every time you get up, you don't have to be running away from something that's trying to eat you every time you have a bath.

So I thought I'd have it cut off. Not, you know, I wasn't necessarily intending to have it as short as I have. But I just, yeah, well, just get it done.

Just do it. Which is what I did. But I was amazed at how much hair there was.

Seriously, it looked, I don't know how best to explain this. It looked, I don't know, like a 70s, 70s porn stars pubic mound. It was like really big, furry, fluffy.

It's just, you know, and it was just, I literally needed both hands to hold it all in. And I was still amazed at how much of the hairs are black. It's like really, not just brown, but actually black at the back.

So I kind of have black hair. And then I think at the top, it's more brown. But at the back, it's black.

Maybe it's just it gets less sun. That makes sense, doesn't it? Because if you walk in, it gets less sun if you walk backwards. Mind you, you're not always walking towards the sun, are you? I don't know.

I'll have to rethink that one. So yeah, I got hold of the hair and threw it, you know. It's a little bit of like, oh, I wonder what I'll find.

What do you expect to find in hair? But there's not much in there. It's just hair. There was some little patches of grey, but there's a lot of dark brown and black hair.

It's like, wow. The thing is, I never really know what I look like from the back. You know, I can't see.

I mean, for all I know, I might have a tail. You know, I don't know. I've never seen myself from the back.

I suppose the only thing I could do is go to Belgium and look through a telescope. Maybe because Belgium's so flat, I might see the back of myself. But other than that, I don't know.

Who knows what I look like? I did wonder once whether or not if I really shaved my head, I'd have eyes in the back of my head. So that's what I used to get told when I was a kid. You must have eyes in the back of your head.

How else would you have known that I was playing the trumpet? I don't know whatever the situation was. That doesn't really fit together, does it? That one. Yes, I could see you playing the trumpet.

But I've had other haircuts. I remember going back to my very first haircut that I recall. All Little Andres popped out to share some hiffies, share some dinner that he had earlier.

That's lovely. I think if I talk quiet enough, he might not realise I'm recording and he'll go back to bed. Or go back to sleep in his bag.

Hopefully. Nope. Oh yeah, he's gone back to sleep.

Good. Sometimes when he gets out of the bag, he's asleep and he goes to the toilet and then he goes back and he's actually asleep. There's been times when he'd come out of the bag and I picked him up and he's fast asleep.

He's not even awake. Then there's other times he comes out of the bag and he's asleep and then he sees me, he hears me talking and he suddenly wakes up and sees the opportunity of annoying me. So luckily, I don't think he noticed I was here.

Don't know who he thought I was. Let's hear what he's like. I want to go into the toilet.

I close the door. The reason I close the door is because when I'm on the toilet, he'll come in. You may say, well, surely you should close the door anyway, but I don't live with anyone.

I don't necessarily leave the door wide open, but I'll push it up. But he'll open it, he can get in. He'll come in and what he'll do is he'll climb into my underpants because my trousers will be down at my ankles with my underpants.

I'll be sitting on the toilet and he'll climb in and start rolling around and I just find that just wrong. So I have to kind of pull my trousers up really high if he comes into the bathroom and I feel myself like, well, you need to be able to relax, don't you, when you're emptying yourself. So what I do is I close the door, generally.

And what he does, and I know this for a fact because he's quite often, he's scratching at the door, then I can hear him sniffing it, which is a bit weird, sniffing underneath the door. And then I open the door and he's there. He runs in, he's been waiting the whole time.

And I see him in action when I've had someone visiting and they've gone to the toilet and he goes and he lays in front of the door the whole time waiting. Now, I'll tell you how dumb he is sometimes. I will actually be doing something.

I'll walk up to the bathroom door and I'll close it. He's with me when I'm doing it. And then I come and sit at the table in the living room and he lays down in front of the bathroom door waiting for me to come out, even though he's already seen me close the door in front of him and he can see that I'm not in there.

And he doesn't move until the bathroom door's open. He doesn't like closed doors for some reason. He'll scratch and scratch and scratch and scratch at the kitchen door.

Sometimes I close it if I've mopped the floor because of the bleach and stuff. So I leave the door closed for an hour or something. Or if I've got the washing machine on just to keep the noise down, I close the kitchen door and he'll scratch and he'll jump up and he'll continuously do it.

He'll keep going back and do it again, again and again and again. And then when I finally let him into the door and I open the door, let him in, he'll run in, look around and then run out again. This is part of his territory.

He checks and he goes into each room and checks. He goes into the bathroom quite a few times a day. Just goes in, looks around, comes out again.

Goes into the bedroom, comes into the living room, goes into the kitchen. Constantly just running up and down, just checking. Checking everything's okay, I suppose, because this is his territory, his home.

And he likes to make sure that everything's how it should be. Isn't that weird? I think it's weird. Anyway, just going back to when I had my first haircut, I don't remember it because I probably was a baby or like a little boy, very young.

Probably like one or two or three, I don't know, whenever haircuts were first introduced. And because I was born in the 70s, long curly hair was very, well, I don't know about fashionable but it was the thing. Even up to the early 80s, if you look at Kevin Keegan, he was one of the most famous footballers in England.

And he had big curly hair. And if you look at loads of the sitcoms and TV shows of the 70s, had people with curly hair, like men with curly hair. And I had curly hair.

And my older brother had curly hair, but my oldest brother didn't have such curly hair, although it got curly at the ends. And we all, all three of us had quite long hair, not like ponytail length, but just down to our shoulders, I suppose. Big and bushy, like a big scouring pad.

And I suppose it was a fashion, but I saw a picture of me when I was about five or six, big old curly hair. I really did. And I can't remember what kind of hairstyle I had.

I think it was just, I think even my dad had big, big hair, big curly hair in the 70s. And he had a beard as well, big beard, well, not a big beard, but he had a beard. Yeah, I suppose it is a big, yeah, quite a big beard, really suited him.

I remember when he shaved it off and this is probably how old I was. I was still young, probably under the age of 10. And he shaved his beard and moustache.

Well, isn't it weird? A beard includes the moustache, doesn't it? Take away the beard and just leave the upper lip, it's a moustache. But if you have a moustache and you have facial hair on your cheeks and chin, then it's a beard, it's no longer a moustache. But you can have a beard without a moustache.

I find that always looks a bit, well, not always, I've not seen every single person ever that's ever had one, but I've tried it myself a little bit and it looks a bit strange. It's just don't look right. It's a little bit when you open a pack of eggs and you pick one of the eggs up out of the car and it's got some feathers on the outside, just like stuck on the outside of the shell, just some little feathers.

I don't know, just don't seem right. No. So I, well, yeah, my dad shaved his beard and moustache, well, shaved his face.

And he came downstairs or upstairs, I'm not sure. Oh, I remember, we were all upstairs playing snooker or pool or something like that. Again, I might be making this up.

I might be in a completely different year, but we knew there was something different about him, but we didn't know what. And you think that something as big as a beard being missing, you'd notice it, but none of us could figure out what it was that was different. I was, we were all kind of making ideas like, is it because now your hair's green? My dad said, no, it was green before.

Okay. I think my brother was saying, nipple piercings? Like, stop that. I'm like, okay.

It's just like, okay, dad, what is it then? There's something different about you, but you can't figure out what it is. Have you come out of the closet? And no, I didn't. And I could not figure it out, honestly.

And he kind of pointed to his chin. I said, you got too fake? No. It was like charades, a really, really, really, really bad game of charades when he was trying to guess what it was, but he was doing nothing to help.

He was just standing there. No, it's a film. It's a game.

It's a movie. It's a book. None of that stuff.

Just like, it's something different. What is it? And personally, I think at the time I was thinking, well, do I win a speed boat if I guess right? Because I used to watch a lot of game shows on TV. You always win something and there's no point.

If you're not going to win anything, what's the point in guessing, right? It's a lot of effort for nothing. And I never did like to waste my time on stuff like that. But then I think one of my brothers, because they were all clever, one of them figured out what it was.

And where's your beard? See, I thought he'd just taken it off. I feel like people take their false teeth out when they go to sleep. I thought maybe he just forgot to put it back on.

And no, he had a shave. He shaved it all off. Never ever grew a beard after that, ever.

Although, I've seen him a couple of times with stubble. It doesn't suit him. It's weird.

I think he used to have a moustache though. I think he still kept the moustache because I'm sure there's a picture of him in the late 80s with a moustache. Pretty, pretty sure.

But yeah, I don't think he likes my beard. See, I've had loads of pictures taken of me over the years. You know, just family occasions.

And when I moved into this flat, my dad put, and my step-mom, they put a collage of pictures, photographs together of family members. And there's one picture of me with my nan. And there's been lots of pictures taken of me and my nan.

He had to choose the one where I'm clean-shaven. I've had a beard pretty much my whole adult life, apart from a few occasions when I've shaved. You know, sort of had too regularly because of my job or something like that.

And he had to pick one picture of me without, and I think I look better with a beard, I think. But then, it's one of those things, isn't it? It's like, well, I've met a lot of women that have told me they prefer clean-shaven men. And I said, you're talking about beards? And he said, yeah, okay, as long as I know what we're talking about, which area.

And she said, well, I live in Kent. I said, no, I didn't mean that. I said, oh, okay.

And she said, there's lots of different, you know, said, oh, it's itchy. It's itchy. I like a clean-shaven man.

I mean, my question would be, well, why are you dating me then, as I had a beard when we met? Yeah, that's one of those things. But then thinking of it as a non-selfish way, it's easy for me to say, you know, I like to have a beard, but I'm not the one kissing myself, am I? You know, if it's irritating or itchy, then I imagine, and it could be a bit like Velcro at times as well, but that's not always a bad thing for the other person though. You were really good at that.

Oh, Jason, you're the best. Yeah, what do you mean I was the best? I couldn't, I couldn't escape. My beard was stuck.

I need oxygen. So why did I have my hair cut? Oh, see, my first stepmother used to, her best friend used to cut our hair, and that was all right. And then when I joined the sea cadets, they used to shave my head.

You know, it was a crew cut every time, which is a bit rubbish. I used to go there and they'd just line everyone up and just shave them. But, you know, I suppose it saved money for the family, didn't it? And then when I left the sea cadets, I was, what, 13? You know, I can't even remember who cut my hair at that time.

I don't remember. I don't recall ever going to a barber's or a hairdresser's, ever. I think it was just always my stepmum's friend.

I mean, she was a professional hairdresser, and she used to come round and do her hair there, I think. And then when I left school, I was kind of on my own, so I had to, you know, sort that stuff out myself. I used to go to a hairdresser's on the corner.

And you might think, on the corner? Which corner? Okay. Where I used to live, I used to live above a chip shop when I was 16. And I, yeah, I'd come out of the chip shop or come out of my door, turn right and turn right again down the high street.

Boots would be opposite. Tesco's would be the other side, so it's still there probably. Boots, I don't know if it's probably still there.

And then going down, because in them days, Boots used to sell albums, like records. Can you believe it? Boots. It's a chemist, by the way, or a pharmacy.

We used to call them chemists. For some reason, we call them pharmacies now. But Boots was probably the biggest one in the country.

Lots of branches all over the country. It may still be the biggest, I don't know. And, yeah, you'd go into the door and walk over and it'd be right on the left-hand side corner, right on the other side of the shop.

And you could buy albums. And I remember I bought Bross and also bought, I used to buy tapes, I think. What did I buy albums? Or tapes? I can't remember.

But generally tapes. And I bought the Stevie Wonder, also the Michael Jackson Bad album. Stevie Wonder, what was that called? Characters.

And, yeah, so Characters, that was his album at that time, 1987. And Michael Jackson was on that album as well. Michael Jackson did a duet with Stevie Wonder, and Stevie Wonder did a duet with Michael Jackson on his Bad album.

And then I also had a lot of stuff. Toothpaste and deodorant. And there's two sets of doors.

I think you'd go in and out of both. That's quite a good Boots. I quite like that.

I'd love to be able to go back in time, just to, I don't know, I'd like, I'll tell you what I'd like. I'd like to be able to go back in time, but have a different appearance. So that I could just melt into the background, no one would notice me.

But then just watch myself go in, watch myself in the chip shop, being naughty or whatever, acting silly. And then just go into some of the shops that I used to go into. I suppose ideally being invisible would be good.

That way I could follow myself home and just go upstairs. Ideally invisible and with the ability to walk through doors and walls. Basically a ghost, I suppose.

And just see how I used to interact. And then I could, oh, another good thing is I could just go in and see what other people have been saying about me. So I could watch myself go upstairs and then just hang around and see if they were saying things about me.

Yeah. Not that that's going to be useful information. And then to be able to go into the shops that were there when I was there, when I was living there at that time in 1987.

So anyway, going down the road, there's, what was down there? I know what's down there now. What was down there at the time? Only things I can remember offhand. Oh yeah.

On the left hand, so walk down towards the, there's a hill that goes down to the seafront. Walking down towards where the hairdressers was, on the left hand side, there used to be this shop that sold stuff. I suppose I should be a bit more specific.

It was like, like an ornamental, like ornaments, books, just lots of, I don't know, crystals, furniture. It was like a weird, weird kind of shop. It was lovely actually.

I liked it. And I used to buy stuff in there sometimes. And yeah, I was there for years.

I was there for a long time, long before I left school. And yeah, so that was there. That's not there anymore.

And further up, I think there is a betting shop. I seem to have a memory, but there's a few coffee shops now, which we never used to have before. People used to drink coffee at home, you know, have a kettle.

If you wanted to drink coffee out, you'd take a flask with you. That used to be the way, you know, in those days. On the right hand side, we had a wimpy.

And I was friends, or my brother and all of us basically, used to go in there. And we're friends with the manager, who was called Sid. And he was a real cool, cool geezer, as you know, cool dude, and friendly.

And you know, so I used to go in there with my friend, who my brother used to go in there and hang around. So he was friends with Sid. And Sid lived upstairs above the wimpy.

And he was into music and singing. And I'm not sure if he had a band or something like that. But he ran the wimpy anyway.

And I remember once going up there with my brother, and I was singing a song that I'd written. And I'm not sure if they were making fun of me or not. I can't remember.

I was probably about 14, 15 at the time, 14. But yeah, I used to go in there and have a cup of tea and a tea cake. Because I didn't necessarily always have money, so I couldn't always afford to buy a burger.

But going with my friend would have a tea cake and a cup of tea. And it was beautiful. It was lovely.

It really was. Lovely tea cake. I still like my tea cakes.

Nice cup of tea. Especially in the winter. Nice, nice and warm in there.

Yeah, it was nice. And they wouldn't kick me out. Well, they would eventually.

But he was happy for me to just sit there until he closed. They used to close at about eight o'clock. So a bit further up, it's now owned by someone else.

So I got on really well with Sid. And he had his, either his brother or his cousin worked there as well. And I was friends with him.

So yeah. So further up, you had a like a video rental store. Is it Hughes? I think it was called Hughes.

And it was they sold video machines. They rented TVs, videos, fridges, as well as selling them, I think. And at one point, they had a video library, you know, to rent.

And I remember I rented out, I think it was nine and a half weeks with Mickey Rourke and someone else who was in it. And I had a video recorder. And I think I watched that video one frame at a time.

I had it on like slow motion. And yeah, I liked that film at the time. And then further up than that, I'm still trying to think what was on the left hand side.

I mean, there's a card shop on the left. I remember there was a card shop on the left hand side, which I think they even had a basement with cards in. It wasn't a big place, but it had a lot of stuff in there.

And it was the best place to get cards from. I think it was the only place devoted to cards. You could still get cards in, I suppose, Woolworths.

Oh, there was a Woolworths, wasn't there? I'm sure that Woolworths was on. Oh, yeah. WH Smith and a Woolworths.

So there was a Woolworths on the right hand side walking up and a Marks and Spencers as well. I'm not sure if the Marks and Spencers is still there, but the Woolworths is gone. That went, where did they go in about 2008, I think.

2008, I think it was, they closed. And Woolworths was the place to go. I don't know if anyone listening to this would remember Woolworths or know of it, but it was, when I was a kid, it was the place to go for anything you wanted.

Any presents for birthdays, Christmas, any Easter eggs, Easter. And then other things like calendars, the New Year's, also cards, loads of birthday and Christmas cards and stuff. Lots of chocolates, lots of stuff for Mother's Day.

And then Christmas, it was just full of Christmassy things. It's a really brilliant shop that somehow turned into rubbish. And I don't know how or why it happened.

But I went into Woolworths shortly before they closed. Before they officially announced they were closing. And I couldn't believe how tacky everything was.

Nothing was put out nice, and it was as if they'd just given up. But that was a good shop, a really, really, really good shop. It's probably one of my favourite all-time shops, actually, the Woolworths.

Because you can get stationery, you could buy albums, music, you know, pretty much loads of things. So anyway, I liked that shop. I got this memory of looking round that shop and going round different aisles looking for stuff.

In fact, I think I had a dream recently, where I was looking around that shop, looking for something. So the shop next to it was Marks & Spencers. And that was quite a good shop because you could walk through it, and there'd be an exit at the back.

So it could be like a little bit of a shortcut. But again, they had everything they'd like. It was mainly food and clothes.

You know, that's the things that they sold. But it was a really busy, full shop. Not sure what's happening with it now.

There might have been a Debenhams as well. I don't think there is now, but there may be a Debenhams there. And the reason I'm not sure is because why would I ever go into Debenhams? It wasn't the kind of shop that I would go into, it wasn't.

But I probably was taken into there when I was a kid to buy shoes. Oh, of course, there were shoe shops. There was a Clark's shoe shop.

I imagine there's probably three shoe shops in the town when I was a kid. There was Next. There was a Next as well.

I remember when I was, yeah, like an older teenager, there was a Next in the town. And I used to buy 501s from Next, I think. My 501 jeans.

I figured, you know, I was practically identical to Nick Kamen, you know, from the Laundrette advert for 501 jeans. I basically spit an image of him, so I thought I might as well wear the jeans as well. And what other shops was there? I remember there was a shop called Tooks, and it was a bakery.

And it may, I think it's a Greggs now, to be fair. But it was a bakery, like, been around forever. And it was, you go in there and eat and, you know, sit down as well as get a takeaway.

But I went in there before it became a Greggs, it was something else before that. I'm pretty sure there was hardly any seats in there. But my recollection, when I was a kid, is that it was massive.

So, unless they just changed the premises. I don't know. Oh, there was a clothes shop opposite.

It's been there for absolutely ever. It's like a woolen shop, sells wool, clothes out of wool. I'm not sure if it's called the woolen shop, but it's got wool in the title.

And it's been there just, I don't know how long, but you know, as long as probably before I even moved to the town, when I was seven. Oh, and there's a travel agents before that. Yeah, there's a travel agents as well.

And I'm not sure which one it was. But I remember because I asked, this is something that actually caused problems for me. But I asked a lady out that worked in there.

And this is something that I can't remember which businessman said it. But he said, when you get a yes in a business meeting, leave. Like if you're saying as if you get a yes in a sale, take it and move on.

Don't continue to sell once you've got the sale. Once you've got the sale, take the credit card, take the payment. But if you continue to sell, you can end up talking your way out of it.

Or a business deal, once you get the yes, leave. Otherwise, you can end up talking your way out of it. And I did that with this lady.

Walked up to her. She knew who I was. I'd met her previously.

And I said, do you want to go out? She said, it wasn't a quick answer to be fair. But she said, yeah, okay. And then I sat down in front of her for the next, I don't know, 40 minutes.

And before I left, she said, no, let's forget that. So I talked my way out of a date with her by just, I can't remember what I was talking about, but whatever it was, she, clearly she kind of went off me. Why? Maybe she thought that's what she was looking, she was going to be getting on a date with me, which pretty much is true.

I'm not saying that we would have sat in a, in a travel agency, but there's probably an estate agents near there as well. Trying to think what other shops. I don't recall a WH Smith being there, but there is one there now.

So maybe there always was one there. And then there's a bank on the right hand side on the corner. And then across the road on the left hand side, I think there's also a bank.

And then as crossing the road, there's the job center. And in the old days, there used to be cards in the window of the job center with jobs written on them with a description. They don't have that anymore.

And then going down, oh, there's an Argos. There's always an Argos in town. I don't remember it being there though.

But maybe it always has been in the same place. And a little bit further down, there was a big toy shop. Can't remember the name of it.

I was going to say Maplins, but it wouldn't be that. Because that's the big famous London one. Um, Girlings.

I think it was called Girlings. And they had trains. You know, like, not proper full size trains, but you never get in the shop, would you? But you know, like the rail model ones.

It was a big shop. Lots of stuff like Lego, you know, you name it, was in there. Apart from things that weren't in there.

But I think there was also a basement, possibly even an upstairs. And every Christmas, they had a Father Christmas there, or Santa Claus, if you call it Santa. So there'd be like a grotto.

It was brilliant. It's really lovely. It was, you know, I used to look forward to it.

And you know, you'd get a present. And then further down still, there was this chocolate shop like they make these special chocolates. And that was nice.

I used to buy, buy stuff like that for my Nan, like, you know, birthdays and Christmases and stuff. And then, yeah, then you turn around the corner, there's a post office. And then on the right hand side, there is a hairdresser.

And what I used to do, because I used to advertise for models. And obviously, you know, because I was so, so incredibly handsome. I thought, yeah, I'll go in there.

But they didn't need me to do any kind of catwalk modelling. It was just they were looking to, for the trainee hairdressers to practice on someone. So I said, yeah, that's fine.

It doesn't cost me anything. So I used to have quite a few different hairstyles. The one I remember the most is the flat top.

It was a really popular haircut. And basically, you had short hair at the sides and back. And then on top, it was flat.

You know, it's probably not explaining it very well. But you could have, you could even have quite long hair, but it was flat. It was always, it could be high up and flat, or low down and flat.

But probably the best description of that would be probably Madness, I imagine. I think Madness, he had the bloke who, you know, the lead singer, I think he had a flat top. But they were really popular in about 87.

Oh, and there was also an Indian takeaway, or I think it might have been a restaurant as well. And there was also one the other side of the road as well. That might have been Chinese.

So I took a girl on a date there once. But anyway, there's hairdressers, that's where I used to go. And the bloke that worked there, I think he owned it, he had long blonde hair.

And he used to, sometimes I'd have my hair cut by him, you know, sometimes or someone else. But I went there for a couple of years. I even had my hair bleached once.

I just remembered, I did go to the hairdressers while I was still at school, because I went and got a half perm, which I didn't even know that existed. But I went and got a half perm on my hair while I was in the last year of school, I think. I don't know why.

I really don't know why I did it. But it was curly. It was just partly curly.

I don't think it was like half my head was curly and the other was straight. I think it was just, I don't know, I can't remember. But it was called a half perm anyway.

Yeah. Then when I was in my 20s, I grew my hair long. So I didn't really have a cut, just like a little bit of a trim every now and then.

And then I got that cut off in 2004. And then I just had my hair pretty much fairly short for the rest of my 20s. And then once I hit 32, I started shaving my hair.

And I've been doing that on and off ever since. I mean, I've got to apologize if this story is too interesting. I do understand that could be the case sometimes.

Anyway, I'm going to go now. Upload this and I shall speak to you tomorrow. Remember, you deserve to be happy.

Bye-bye.