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Hello, hello, hello, hello. Welcome to jasonnewland.com and this is Let Me Bore You to Sleep and it's actually a live recording. Oh, I'm bored already.
Oh, so basically the idea behind this is, as I make as much noise as I can, click the person's website you want to, okay, it's pretty good, copy and paste this code in your website. Barely two seconds. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna play around a little bit with what I'm doing.
So just bear with me while I do this. So the idea behind this really is, first of all, only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes or watch it when you can safely close your eyes if you're watching on YouTube. And, uh, uh, uh, uh, what is this? Uh, okay, what am I thinking of doing? What? Yes, there is, Jason.
That's a problem when I use, I've got a laptop and it's just, it doesn't have all the stuff that I'm used to having on there. Yay. Now you can't tell me that listening to me tapping on a keyboard and a laptop is boring because it is very boring.
Very, very much so. So what I was thinking of doing, I'm going to share this. So I need to share this on where do I share it? I want to share it on Facebook.
Well, how do I share it? Stop, start play when a live, start play automatically when a live starts. Okay. Likes, comments.
That's what I do. Playlist enabled. Play continuously.
Episode after an episode. I'm not sure what that means. Playlist enabled.
Ah, okay. Playlist after. So when this one done, it can play another one.
Oh, that's quite cool. Step one, copy and paste this code in your website where you want the embedded player to appear. Step two, then copy and paste this code in your website just before the closing.
Oh, no. Iframe. That's what I want.
Okay. Just bear with me two seconds because that's what you want to do. You want to, I need to share it with Facebook.
How do I share it with Facebook? I need to go back. I want to share it. I want to share it.
I want to share it with Facebook. Okay. Join me live.
Now, let me go to sleep. To sleepep. Sleepep.
Sleep. Sleep. All right.
Okay. So I can post that on my Facebook page. So I'm wondering if I customize the website so that this plays, but it's an embedded, yeah, it's an embedded code.
I wonder if that's right. So if I add a section, which is collection image, post, text, video, custom HTML. So I wonder if this will work.
I wonder, wonder, wonder, wonder, wonder. Ah, looks like it is. Looks like it is.
So let me bore you to sleep. Okay. Every night, 11pm, 1am.
Yeah. UK time. How about that then? Let me bore you to sleep every night.
Live. So I need to put live, don't I? Live. Okay.
I need to put it there. That's it. Broadcast.
So I don't know if there's anyone actually listening. I don't know. Hello? Is anybody watching or listening? See, what would be the good thing to do is in the future, you'd better just go to my website every night, 11 o'clock.
And you can just listen on the website. That's kind of what I'm planning to do. Every night, UK.
Yeah. So if I save that, the thing is, I do have volume on there. So I can't actually hear anything.
So I do wonder what's going on. But what I need to do is I need to save it. I need to go back and then move it up to the top.
Move it up to the top. So I need to have it really at the top of the page. Because that's where... Yeah, that makes sense.
Live broadcasts. Yeah. Oh, there we go.
So there we go. That's it. Right at the top.
Live broadcast. Let me bore you to sleep. So the question now... Okay, so it's saved, but I suppose it's not going to play because I'm not actually on my website, am I? So if I go to my website, let's have a look.
Where are you? If it's going to play for me. It should automatically play. Unless I have to play it.
If it's going to play for me. Oh, yeah. It should automatically play.
Yay. So it did. It just did it.
So that's nice. That's nice to know. And so that's all working.
So basically, all you need to do is just go to my website, jasonnewland.com, every night, 11 o'clock to 1am UK time. So you can work out what time that is in your own time. It depends where you live, of course.
If you live in Birmingham, it's going to be the same time as if you live in Manchester, or if you live in Colchester, where I am. However, if you lived in New York, then it might be something like six hours behind or ahead. I'm not sure which, but yeah.
So there you go. So this is... I'm not quite pleased with this. So live broadcast, let me bore you to sleep.
It's number 88. So if I'm going to change the name, change the name of it. So 88 live broadcast, let me bore you to sleep every night, 11 to one.
So it's a mouthful though, isn't it? It's a long old title. Jason Newland. The second February 2019.
Yes, it's a long old title to be fair. But I don't know what else can you do. It's 11pm to 1am UK time, every night.
Let me bore... live broadcast, let me bore you to sleep. I don't know. That's all right.
I mean, is it all right? Does it need to be changed? I don't know. Let me just have a look, see if it's changed. If I rewind this, restart it.
Yeah, it does. 88. The thing is, I suppose it's part of the reason to let you know the time is so that you know what time to come.
Does that make sense? It seems to be sort of quite a good thing to do. So what have we got? I've got a live chat here. Sebastian Kynikas.
This next sentence is just, you cannot escape me, Newland. This... I don't know. He's talking about something.
It's actually a friend of mine, but he's... who knows what he's talking about. So he's... I've got one. So he's also sent a little love heart.
He loves what I do as well. It's lovely of him. And if you want to be a part of this broadcast, and if you want to... Yeah, just leave a message.
You can leave a message. I think if you're on the website and you want to leave a message, you can click on the message. So at the moment, if you just click on the... it's underneath.
Basically, you'll see it. It's a message thing. You click on it.
It will take you to the Spruika website, and then you can leave a message. Apparently, if you open the Spruika player in multiple tabs, my voice becomes like Darth Vader. Well, that's very nice.
It's very nice. Thank you very much, Sebastian, for your contribution to tonight's show. You've been a very good boy.
So that's putting a little message. Well, that's very nice. It's like a virtual... a little virtual star.
You know, when you're at school, you give the little kids a little star. So well done. You've done really well.
You managed to eat without chucking your food at your friends. Yes, good boy. Good boy.
So that's going to be... I think Sebastian's going to be a regular contributor to this show. And I might... yeah, because it's... it is a let me boy to sleep show. But I will be influenced by those of you that contribute.
You can also, if you wish, leave a message on my Twitter page. And my Twitter page is Jason Newland. Or is it Jason Newland? Or is it hashtag Jason Newland? I don't know.
But that's my Twitter. It's Jason Newland. J A S O N N E W L A N D. So that might be a better place to contact me.
I'm not sure. I'm not 100% sure. I'm not... I'm not 100% bothered, to be honest.
But if you'd like to, you can contact me there. So yeah, at Jason Newland. That's it.
And that's my Twitter. So perhaps I should post that on there. Oh, where are we? Where are we? Where are we? So I'll just post it as a message.
So we could basically do... you can contact me on there. How else could you contact me if you wanted me to contribute to the show? Because it's kind of turning into a show, I suppose, now that it's become a live event. Event.
Now that it's become a live thing. Although once it is finished, you know, when I've recorded and I've finished talking about whatever, it will then be available for you to listen back as well. But you'll also be able to do that on my website, jasonnewland.com. So if you're mainly interested in the let me bore you to sleep sessions, including previous sessions and everything, just go to my website, because on the very first page, there is a... what do they call it? I've embedded it basically.
I've embedded the podcast in there. And within that, you've got access to all 88 of the recordings so far. If you're ever that bored to listen, to want to listen to all 88.
So that's... they're not all an hour long. When I first started doing them, they're about 30, 40 minutes. I've even got... now the very first one I ever did was 28 minutes and 13 seconds long.
And the second one I did was 20 minutes and 35 seconds long. So it just gives you kind of an idea of the sort of time that I was putting into it when I first started. The third one was 22 minutes and 19 seconds long.
The fourth one was 52 minutes and 23 seconds long. I wonder how I can put a comments box. I wonder if I can include a comments box in the sharing it.
I think that would be an option, wouldn't you? I'm sure it must be an option. Let me just have a look. I need two seconds while I'm just going through the let me bore you to sleep options of how to embed.
View episode, delete episode. I also need to share it, don't I? So, oh, that's not the right one. That's not the right one at all.
Okay. Undo that. So if I come out of there.
So if I share this, Andres pulled his bag right underneath the chair or on the desk underneath the table rather. I tried to call it a desk, but it's not really. I'm going to have my Cadbury's cream egg.
I want to remember this feeling of pleasure when I was sitting in a dentist chair. Oh, it's nice. Okay, where am I? So I'm sharing this with Facebook.
So I've already shared it on one Facebook. And I'll just stuff the whole thing in my mouth. I'm sometimes surprised at how much I can fit in my mouth.
Or would it be better to? Okay, I'll send it. Yeah, that's what I'll do. Live now.
I'd like it to. Does it make it easier to just come to my website? I don't know. So you can contact me on Twitter at Jason Newland.
I would give you my Google Plus. But there's no point really learning that one, because I'll be gone very soon. Basically, what Google Plus did was what? Was it iTunes that did it with the iPhone? Where they basically, they put the YouTube's new album, I think, on to, and it kind of forced everybody to have it on their iTunes account.
And they did in the Google Plus kind of forced everybody to have Google Plus. Anyone that has a YouTube account had to sort of have a Google Plus account. Okay, where is it? Ooh.
Right, so I'm just now gonna share on a group. I'll just let you know that I might not turn up tomorrow. I'm very lazy.
I've got a very, what is the right word? A very, very weak work ethic. I don't believe in that. I don't like to do things sometimes.
It's not working. Okay. So let me just have a look on Twitter to see whether or not anybody has commented or said anything.
Because Twitter's supposed to be quite a good place. I see that when I watch or when I listen to stuff. Okay.
Okay. All right, now I'll just, so nothing, no, no one's left any messages. Oh, oh, I wanted messages being left, but nothing, nothing at all.
That's okay. Okay. So let's have a look.
Episode audio, permanent link, direct download link, public, enable this option if your recording contains explicit content. It's not really, I don't, I don't really do explicit content. I can't be bothered.
Episode sharing, episode info. Oh, that's weird. So how did I share it before? Episode audio file, episode sharing.
Oh, that's weird. Unless it's, oh, oh, embed episode. That's what it was, wasn't it? Embed episode.
Playlist enabled. It also needs to have comments, elements visible, comments. But it didn't have, use photos of background for player's top part.
Can you imagine people putting down the, you know, switching the off button because it's too boring. It's supposed to be boring. I don't need this.
Yeah, I can add the Spreaker logo. It doesn't really matter, does it? Oh, well. So let's see what else.
So apparently I've got seven, seven messages all by the same person. Did you invite me to join you on the podcast? We could try to talk about boring things. Yes, let's try to come up with the most boring dialogue.
I could read boring stuff from the internet. Yeah, go ahead and do that. And I may invite someone to come and have a chat at some point.
But unfortunately with this podcast, even the live streaming doesn't allow me to include people to it, if that makes any sense. Let's have a look. And I wonder if it lets me know how many people are actually watching the chat.
Did you just invite me to join? No. So if I put leave a message, no. Oh, OK, cool.
I can do that while I'm actually on the thing. But now I don't know how to get out of it. Oh, OK.
OK. So I've got two followers live at the moment. A few stats.
So I don't know. Looks like I've got six people listening. It's really hard to really know.
So, so this is live. Oh, OK. But I've managed to get stuck.
Tap and hold the message to get more options. Oh, I'm able to block people. That's good.
All I want to do is go back to previous screen, but it's not allowing me. So I don't know. I don't know how I'm going to stop this thing.
There must be a way. Oh, well, if it comes to it, I'll just turn the phone off. So it should be fine.
So I'm just going to Facebook and. So has anyone left a message? I'll go off of there. Go off of there.
So that's my Facebook. Go off of there. So if I go to Facebook.
So I've not really done much today. I've spent quite a bit of the day in bed. So I was up till about 5.30 this morning.
I was just doing my thing, you know, and just, you know, I was working on the website. So I'm in the process of adding lists of hypnotherapists on there. So, yeah, that's what I'm doing at the moment.
So Cassie Carter, she's on Facebook, feeling shocked. She says, I'm almost 29. How'd that happen? I don't know.
Fiona says, what will happen in your life in February? So Petra Verne says, in February, you will come to a point in life where nothing shakes you anymore. You will feel extremely strong and grateful for the memories in your past. Next month, you will finally feel free to live a fantastic life.
Ah. So I've got a message from Sebastian. So there's nothing there, just him just chatting.
So there's no messages on there. Let's see if anybody's left a message. No.
Join me live, let me bore you to sleep. Maybe it's just the wrong time of the day. I don't know.
Maybe it's, it might be too late for England, but too early for America. It's hard to know, isn't it? Let me see if I can share it with a few people. Share.
Share. Share as a message. Someone has asked a question in a bipolar support group.
Does anyone else pick their skin? Well, clearly not. I wouldn't pick the skin I've got, would I? I've got nicer skin than this. So send.
Join me live. Okay. So look.
Just add in a few people and just ask them if they want to join me live, if they wish to do so. For a nice boring conversation. Claire.
Who else? Cassie. Ah, Yannica. Yannica.
I'm just sending it to people that have joined me previously in the past. Previously in the past, didn't need both those sentences really. Okay.
Anyway, I'm bored with that. So I've got a couple of messages back. And let's have a look.
Bec Buxton says, huh? And then she says, sorry, half asleep, just dozed off. And so, yeah, it wasn't, it's not important. I'm just letting you know that I'm live in case you wanted to be live.
Well, you're live, aren't you? But you know what I mean. If you wanted to join me on my little adventure. So I'm just basically just talking.
So I asked a question the other day about what would you like to, what would you like me to do a recording of? What would you like me to talk about? And, you know, in these, let me bore you to sleep things. So I made a couple of suggestions. And let me have a look at the suggestions that I got gift.
And this was in my Jason Newland hypnotist page. Hello, Bex. Bex says she's listening now.
So Bex is the star of the show. She's listening. It's not really anything.
It's quite weird. I'm about to tell you that don't bother to listen. Because it's just going to be boring.
But it's supposed to be boring because it's me just talking boring about nothing. But yeah, that's kind of what it's really about. But I'm just gonna have a look, see what I've got another message sent to me.
I saw a message sent me a message and I'll struggle with using a laptop at the same time. Okay. So got a message on my number 33 deep sleep whisper hypnosis.
That was 30th of January 2019. Not only this podcast, but the entire series in general is great. I've only listened to it a couple of times, but it seems to clear my jumbled thoughts and keep them cleared for the entire night.
However, it is ruined by your constant farting. No, she didn't say that. It's ruined by the loud adverts that play at the end.
So what I've done is I've corrected it. Oh, that message is a lot longer than I remember. So I've deleted.
Yeah, I deleted it. So I made sure that the adverts are no longer there at the end of the podcast. So a couple of messages.
When I said, let me know if there's anything about me that you would like me to talk about in my, let me bore you to sleep sessions. I will mention you at the beginning of the session. Thanks.
Kiss, kiss. And I'll just let you know the kisses were more of a just a general kiss. It wasn't romantic.
Just a general kiss. Because sometimes kisses can be misconstrued as something that they may not be. And I kind of, I do tend to put kisses on cards.
You know, it's sometimes I get so carried away, I forget to put my own name. Just got continuously kisses, kisses, kisses. So, and so I've got a couple of messages.
Someone said, Paul says, it won't be boring anymore. And I will tune in and listen to the stories. And I replied, I promise that it will still be boring.
I'm basically, in a sense, asking people to, I'm still going to be doing what I do. It's just make it a little bit, well, not more interesting, but interactive, maybe by having other people participate in that way. Simon Small says, Brexit.
Nah, scrap that. I can tune into any UK news channel and be asleep within 45 seconds. Dash, dash, dash, dash, dash.
Okay. So I know that dash, dash, dash is like a gap or a space or a break, a breather, you know, but I never know how long for. Sometimes it'd be good if it had brackets like 10 seconds or just to give more of an idea.
If it was like two minutes, then you know, they've gone to the toilet. Okay. So you have just received a random gift of £100,000 in cash, and you have seven days to spend it on yourself.
No charitable donations, or you lose the lot. What do you buy? One hour, bore me to sleep, go. That's the, it wasn't an alarm.
It was, it was a sleep. Zed, zed, zed, sleep. And a good idea, I said, this is me replying, I thin.
So I didn't even, I wasn't telling them that I was thin, because I'm not. I just put, I forgot the K for some reason. I thin, that will be my next one.
And that was commented on by Jason Newland. Then there's a bracket, it's a question mark in brackets for some reason. Simon Small replies to me, says, give me a shout out, dude.
I'll be tuning in as a non-materialist man. I'm sure it won't be easy. No one, I'm very materialistic.
I could do a hundred grand. I could do it in a day. I could do it in an hour.
Buy a yacht and then sink it. It's easy. In fact, a hundred grand wouldn't even buy a yacht, I don't think.
But it won't be, no one purchase can exceed 20 grand. Ah, so I couldn't buy a yacht. Looking forward to it.
I could buy lots of little boats, all costing 20 grand each. So how many would that be? 20. So that, you could buy five, five boats and then just ram them into each other and destroy them.
Like a, yeah, that'd be fun. Or do like a drag race with 20,000 pound cars, five of those, or maybe 10, 10,000 pound cars and just, you know, smash them into each other. They're very aggressive, isn't it? My, my thoughts.
Personally, 10 grand, I would, or a hundred grand. Ideally, if a hundred grand, that would keep me going for five years. If I had a hundred grand, I could sign off unemployment and I could continue doing my work online, doing this stuff and live on 20 grand a year, which would pay my rent, my food and pay for the expenses of running the free hypnosis service stuff.
It's pushing him out from underneath the table. It's annoying me. Keep putting my foot on his bag.
So yeah, 20, I wouldn't want to waste a hundred thousand pounds in a week. The idea of spending a hundred grand and having nothing to show for it would be awful. It would just, you know, that's why I just, I'm not into heavy drugs and stuff because it's just such an expensive waste of time.
You could spend, you'd have a party and you could spend thousands and thousands in an evening and have nothing to show for it. Or go into a bar and spend 10,000 pounds on a bottle of champagne and then pour it over your bum. You know, it's so many different ways to waste money.
I prefer to have 20,000 pounds a year and then just work. If I had a hundred grand, I'd put it in the bank, but then I can't spend it in seven days if it's in the bank. Unless, ah, so it says, you can choose, you've just received a random gift of a hundred thousand pounds in cash.
Having seven days to spend it on myself, no charitable donations or I lose a lot. Well, I could buy gold. So I could buy gold for however much it is and that would be spending on myself.
Or I could buy myself a golden suit, which costs a hundred thousand pounds, made of gold. Admittedly, I'd probably struggle to dance in it, but forgetting that. So I have that for myself, a nice gold overcoat or maybe a gold chair, like a throne or something.
And then once the seven days is over, I could just sell the gold back and cash it, cash the money, put the money into a bank or not into a bank, into my bank. Not my, I don't own it, you know, put it into the place where my bank account is held and just draw out 20,000 a year throughout the year. So whatever that, however that works out, 20 grand a year is two, so a hundred pound a week is five grand a year.
Two hundred pound a week would be 10 grand a year. Three hundred pound a week would be 15 grand. So 400 pound a week would be 20 grand.
So I would literally draw out, I had my rent being paid out of my account and bills and stuff. So I would draw out 200 pound a week in cash. And then the rest of the money would go out of my account to pay for bills, rent and all that stuff.
Because the rent is 85 pound a week. So that's, yeah. So then in, and I'll pay then the 200 pound a week, I draw out and pay for food, clothes, getting my hair done, you know, more nice and sexy.
I said the word sexy, does that mean this is now an explicit recording? Oh no. So that's what I would prefer. I wouldn't want a hundred thousand pound to waste, unless I need to have something to show for it.
If that makes sense. I don't, I wouldn't, I could kit out my flat really nice, you know, get a really nice carpet, get it all soundproofed, get a soundproofed booth in here, get a big telly on the wall, get a, you know, a nice chair to replace the, my big black squeaky chair is starting to run out. It's very worn now, but it's worn because I've been sitting in it.
It's been very kind to me. It's my, it's my, I wouldn't even get rid of it. I'd still keep it, but I would replace it with another one and I'll keep this chair maybe in the bedroom or in a different place for visitors or something.
So I'd still keep it. I don't think I could ever get rid of it. It's been part of my life for nearly four years, three, three and a half years.
I've missed that little big old squeaky black chair, but I'd like to get a lazy boy, you know, like a proper recliner, but quieter. I just, I live quite minimalist, so I don't have a lot of stuff. I don't want a lot of stuff.
I'd like more books and mainly just hypnosis books. I'd like to, I'd quite like to get my bedroom organized in a way where I can have clothes, some nice clothes in there. And I think the nice clothes as well.
But a hundred thousand pound, I suppose you can actually buy, actually buy a car. I wouldn't know what to do with a hundred thousand. Well, I would.
It would be, I couldn't, I wouldn't want to waste it. I'm not allowed to give it away. Unless you'd class no charitable donations, no charitable donations as being no donations to charity, but it's okay to give money away to friends and family.
If that's the case, then I would give money. And if I had to get rid of it, or in seven days, I'd give money to my dad, my two brothers and my sister, and a couple of friends. And yeah, I thought I could go and get, go onto Amazon and spend, could easily spend probably 10,000 pounds on books.
Things, you know, that I could, because some of the books I like, they're kind of maybe a little bit expensive, some of them. I could easily spend 10,000 pounds on books and sort of books. Hypnosis courses, online stuff.
All I could do, all I could do is something that I'd like to do. I'd like to do a master's, go to university and get a master's, but I can't even afford to do the Open University because it costs too much. So I could pay for the Open University, for an Open University degree with that, or pay to go to university to get a degree in psychology and just pay ahead.
So if it's, each year is, what's it, 9,000, so I could pay, so that's nearly 30,000. And then, I don't know, I'm trying to figure, I'm trying to figure a way around it. It's not a bad problem to have, is it? You've got to, you've got to waste 100,000 pounds in a week.
I don't know, I think it would be, and also, because that's, so that's Simon Small, so that's a shout out for him. Ella Brigano says, I know, I don't know if you have before, but you should talk about your taste in music or books. Well, Ella, I have.
I did reply to that as well. I think I said, I don't think I said it's actually in front of me. I actually said, hi, I may have talked about this before, but I can again.
After all, there is nothing more boring than repetition. In fact, I didn't say that, I said, after all, there is nothing more boring than, than repetition. For some reason, I decided to say repetition twice, well, not then, twice.
So I decided to repeat then twice before the word repetition, which didn't really, doesn't really make a lot of sense. So yeah, I just, no one purchase can exceed 20,000 pounds. I'll be honest with you, Simon, I've never been in a position where I've had to worry about not having 20,000, you know, not being able to buy anything that was 20,000.
It was, oh no, I'm not buying that. Just make sure it's under 20,000 before I pay for it. Yeah, it is, okay.
I think these days, I try and buy things, try and look for about around the pound deal. There used to actually be a shop where I live, because you've got, we've got the pound shops, you've got the, the pound shop, what's the other one? Pound Palace, I'll probably make that up. You know, discount stores like that.
But there was a shop called, and I still think it's the best title. It was called Around a Pound. And for those that are not from England or don't know about the financial and money, monetary things in England, or, you know, not only England, but also, you know, Scotland and Wales as well.
We have a thing called the pound, which is pound sterling, which is the equivalent to dollars. So if you're in Australia, I think you have dollars, America, US dollars, Canadian dollars. In quite a few parts of Europe, they've got the euro.
And even Ireland took on the euro. But we didn't, in England, we didn't take that. We, we already had our currency.
We've had it a while. We didn't really need another currency. And I think quite a few countries did.
I don't know, did France take on the euro, or did it, do they still have francs? See, I'm not sure. Paseos, that's Spain, wasn't it? Yeah, I don't remember. Actually, it's not that I don't remember, it's kind of, I don't care.
And also, how can I remember something that I never knew? To start with, which is possibly I didn't know to start with. I'm not sure. Not 100% sure, no.
So let me just have a look to see this bit, see. So, okay, buy Andre some ferret friends, for £100,000, Dex, I could, there wouldn't be any room. Can you imagine, if I bought Andre friends, like, first of all, I've got more ferrets.
No, one's enough, I couldn't handle two. It's just, it's non-stop, sometimes he's non-stop. And I think he'd love to, I'm thinking about getting him a little child to be a daddy for, I don't know, I've thought about it.
And he might love it, but he also might eat it, so I don't know. It's hard to know what his reaction would be to that. But he's, he's very, Andre's very, can you hear that, the boiler? Really loud, it's like a, it reminds me a little bit about the old internet, you know, back in the dial-up days, the late 90s.
Also kind of a mixture between that and the old printers. It would just take, you know, an hour to print out one page. I remember when broadband came in and you could download a video instantly and watch it and stream it instantly without any buffering.
I guarantee that day when broadband was introduced, that very first day, there was a lot of people phoned in sick, didn't go to work that day. And when they did go to work the next day, they looked very tired. That's all I'm saying on that subject.
Oh, itchy. So let me see. My iPhone has just frozen, and genuinely, genuinely has frozen.
I'm looking at the, it's really strange, this whole setup is, I suppose it's something to get used to, isn't it? So apparently, out of my podcast, the Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast, I've done 87 hours and 43 minutes. That's in 88 episodes, including this one. Isn't that weird? It's a lot, isn't it? It's a lot of, a lot of talking, a lot of, hmm, you know, oops, sorry, Andre, I just kicked him.
Oh, he's gone to run off. Probably he's gonna start scratching at the front door, being naughty as he normally is. So I'm looking at my web, so it's not saying how long I've been on here.
Let me just see if it's still playing. You are you, and that's dandy. That was way too loud to apologize.
Which makes me think, so I think basically, when you start playing, even when it's live, there's the adverts at the beginning for a minute, and then you start hearing me. Hopefully it won't be, it won't start right at the beginning, otherwise that would be a bit rubbish. I'm just having a little listen to the adverts.
I might go to Sainsbury's then. Commercial ends in six seconds. It's not weird, so it is, so my voice is a lot lower than the sound of the adverts at the beginning.
There's not really a huge amount I can do about that. This is the volume I talk, I'm not shouting, and there's nothing I can do about the volume of the adverts, but luckily they are at the beginning, so I've made sure that they're not at the end, so they won't disturb anybody ever again, but they are at the beginning. And the reason they're there is because, oh, what's that? Let's see if anyone, oh, oh well.
You can contact me at Jason Newland at Twitter, at Jason Newland, or just follow me on there if you want. And also, my page is Jason Newland. Facebook is, I don't know what it is, I can't even bother to do it, but it's somewhere.
My page is somewhere on Facebook. It's very strange, the whole, doing it live, it distracts me, so I need to kind of stop So, Sebastian tells me that this is too boring. Tell us a pointless, boring story from your life now.
So, let me get this right, it's too boring, can you please tell us a boring story? And then he, 25 minutes ago, he said, tell us the one story where you had the accident with that Roman candle. Again, that didn't happen. There's lots of boring stories, isn't there? Bruce, maybe you could tell me your boring story.
Someone said to me the other day on Facebook, they said, if I did this story, it wouldn't be boring, I should find it interesting. I don't find anything interesting, really, about my life, or what's happened during my life at all. I thought most stories are quite boring, just generally, just, that's why I wanted this to be.
You know, you get someone and they just want to tell you about their travels. I just remember I was, I had a date with someone years ago, and we were sitting there having lunch, and it was outside a restaurant, and we were, it was lovely food, I guess, and she was telling me all about her travels, telling me a story about her being, having gone travelling. And I just, I just wanted it as a police horse to walk past and far, or do a big poo on the pavement near us, that just, as a distraction.
I just didn't, just didn't see the point in the stories. Andre, come on. I want to give Andre a cuddle, but he's just hiding.
Come here, mate. I'll go get him. Sometimes, all I want to do is give my little boy a cuddle, and he just, he's not interested.
He wants to bite me, or he wants to, he wants his slipper, his girlfriend. You're my little boy, you know. I want to spend time with you.
Yes, I do. Yes, I do. You give daddy kisses.
Now, please remember to do a poo on the carpet. On the paper, rather. You know, he actually waits.
Well, I've got a new tweet, so that might mean, oh no, it's from Donald Trump. That might mean, hey, give me kisses. Give me kisses.
Kiss, kiss, kiss. Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss. You know, I take him out for walks.
He'd love me to take him out now. He really would, but I'm not going outside when it's pitch black outside. No street lights.
No, I'm not doing it. I'm not going out there. It'd be different if he was the size of a dog, because it'd be the most vicious animal of that size in the world.
Pretty much, it'd be more vicious than a wolf. If he was the size of a dog, if he was the size of a wolf, you know, he'd be, but he's not. He's little.
So he's not going to help me. If, you know, UFOs came down or whatever. Well, I've got a tweet.
Is this going to be for me? No, it's from Matthew Staglin. From LBC. I listen to LBC, by the way.
If you don't, you know, it's up to you. But I like to, I don't know what it is. I like to listen to different people's opinions, but without having to hear it myself, without actually having to be involved rather.
I just find it interesting to hear how extreme people can be and how angry they can get sometimes at really believing what they're thinking and how it's the only way to think. I just find it quite funny. Perhaps I shouldn't, but I do.
Can he help it? So let's have a look. So no one's contacted me on Twitter yet, which is okay. That's fine.
It's all right. Doesn't matter. It does.
It matters to me, but it doesn't matter. It's okay. So what's the chances of me getting some kind of sponsorship for this podcast? Can you imagine? Oh, look.
Alvarez, Kavalev 2, coming to you from Alvarez. Oh, okay. I was watching the boxing this evening.
I do like boxing. It's one of my favourite. It's the only sport I like, actually.
It's the only sport. Don't watch football, rugby. I can't even.
I was trying to watch it today. It was on telly. I was trying to.
I'm watching it and just don't get it. It's just not for me. I know it's popular with a lot of people.
It's just not my thing. It's all cricket. Boxing is the only sport that I actually, I'm going to say that gets me excited.
But yeah, it kind of is. I like MMA as well. Mixed martial arts.
We don't have, in England, we don't have, we do have like Superbowl, like they show it on television, you know, the Superbowl and there's a couple of programs dedicated to American football. But we don't, I know in America, basketball, baseball and American football or football, as you call it over there, you call, I know in America, you call football soccer. It's just right there, way above, near like the top, I know you got basketball, baseball and football, American football.
But here, football is the top or what you might call soccer. And then below that, I suppose, rugby. And below that would probably be, I don't know, cricket, snooker, possibly.
Boxing, I'm not even sure if boxing would be in the top five, I don't know. It's possibly cricket would be in the top three. Never really, see, I'll talk about sports that I don't really kind of enjoy, but I'll talk about it in a respectful way, because we've all got things that we like.
It's just I don't, I've never kind of really understood why people like cricket, but then I don't care why they like it either. Good luck to anybody that likes whatever they're doing, really, I suppose. You know what I mean? Let's have a look, see if there are any more notifications.
Let's have a look, so two, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, back to what I was doing before, just doing when I feel like it. It's just, oh, imagine talking two hours every day. What makes it harder is being online and watching, looking at the internet and that distraction.
I'd find it a lot easier if I was sitting in my chair just talking. That would be a better experience for me. So maybe that's perhaps what I need to do.
Perhaps. Or, or, or, or I could have, I suppose technically I could, maybe not now, but in the next few weeks or so, perhaps have a stream, a video stream, Facebook, and perhaps then invite someone to come on. I don't even know if, what's his name still there? Is Sebastian still there? Because he hasn't, I think he's, I don't know if he is there.
Could kind of add him on, I suppose. Let's have a look. What's the thing you can talk to people on? Skype, I suppose, Skype.
I've never tried that other one. There's another thing, isn't there, you can use. It's become, I think, more popular lately.
Or I keep getting messages from it saying it's the best one to use. Whether it is or not, I don't know. Start a conversation.
Let me just see if he's, if he answers. Okay. In fact, might be asleep.
Oh, he isn't online. Oh, I thought he wanted to be part of this. If he isn't online, maybe he was asleep and I woke him up.
Oh well. So I had two chats. Fourth of the first, 219.
He hasn't messaged. Okay. Oh, that's weird.
When I fall in love, it will be forever. Or I'll never fall in love, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do to send you to sleep. Nice little lullaby.
Lully, not lullah, but lully. A lully, a lullaby. I could have done these whisper, couldn't I? Should I do the rest of it as a whisper? It's more intimate, isn't it, when it's whispering? Just like a more closer, I think.
Can't believe Google Plus is closing. My comment about Google Plus closing was, I shall cry milky tears from my third eye. That's a bit near the knuckle.
Someone said, FYI, I will be off Facebook, or FB, which I'm less, I guess it's Facebook. Too lazy to write Facebook for a while. I'm emotionally drained and I won't take the drama anymore.
Self-care is my number one priority for Stop. So I wonder what's going on there. I'll just have a look at this.
Oh, it is quite dramatic. I can't read it out to you, but it's... I'll just end reading. Wow.
Imagine if people realised that Facebook isn't real, just a website. Just a website, people. Just a silly website.
But I'd love it if Facebook just closed down and more people do. What would I do? How would I share my stuff? Oh, I'm sure I'd be fine. Facebook.
How would people learn to communicate if Facebook sort of disappeared? They'd have to talk to each other. I wouldn't want that. That's the one good thing about Facebook is not having to actually have a dialogue, not have a conversation.
Just send... That's why I like texting. Send a text. I hope you're well.
Bye. It's not even, are you well? Tell me. Just hope you are well.
You don't really need to respond to this, is the undercurrent, I think, with that. Bye. So it's kind of sending love, but in the same way.
Not needing to know any more at this point. Yeah. I have a two rule, a two text rule.
I text someone, or if they text me, I reply. If they text me again, I reply. If they text again, that to me is too many times.
I won't have a conversation by text. You know, I will phone the person and get the words out verbally rather than have to type them out on a little phone. That's one of my little rules I carry around with me.
No more than three texts. Third exchange, that's it. Over and done with.
Some people like to keep it going for hours. And I'm not one of those people. I'm really not.
And I've got a friend that's still waiting for me to reply to her from about two weeks ago. Too many texts. I tell people, but they don't seem to believe me.
They think I'm joking. No. What other ways am I amazing? I tell you what, I'm amazing because I'm going to end this recording, but I don't know how to do it.
So I'm going to have to figure out a way to end it, to finish it. And how do I do that? That's the problem. It's got to be a way.
Build your brand. So this is it. So if I just press that.
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.