#24 Let me bore you to sleep - LIVE - Jason Newland (26th May 2018)

So hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. This is the very first let me bore you to sleep live on YouTube and it's a bit of a technical setup. So I've got my, I'm just going to check it's working.

Excuse the banging. It'll be a little bit smoother next time. So I'm recording this on the recording studio that I've got so that when I upload it onto my podcast it will be a better quality sound.

I hope that the sound's okay so I'm going to need people, if anyone is watching, just to let me know that the sound is okay on this. The problem I'm having, well it's not a major problem, is I've got my iPad here now so I've got all this technology going on. I've got my iPhone there, my television, I'm streaming from my laptop to my television so I can see myself on the TV to see that I'm okay, that it's on.

And then of course I've got the recording studio and I've got the iPad. So there's all this technology going on. The thing is, is I'm trying to sync it all.

Sync it? As in S-Y, not end it all, you know. So ender sounds a bit dramatic. Right, so what I'm going to do is I'm going to sign into my Facebook.

So apologies to those that normally listen to these sessions and expect it because it's not quite as exciting as it normally is. So I should be able to log in and then I can get to the page and if anyone's leaving me any messages, any comments, then I can answer them. So I can kind of do a... if it allows me to do it.

The iPad isn't really working so great for some reason. Come on. Okay.

So this is Let Me Bore You To Sleep, number 24. Only watch or listen to this when you can safely close your eyes. I'm recording this live and it's way more work than I really want it to be, to be fair.

So hopefully... Okay, I thought I'd be able to see any messages maybe. So... Oh well. Hello to those of you that are watching.

I can't seem to see any messages that are here so it's fine. I will just do what I do. And by the way, if there's kind of a weird... it's not really a stain as much.

It's on my t-shirt. Of course, you'll only really be able to enjoy that visual if you're watching a video on YouTube. But perhaps if you can hear my voice okay and the quality of the sound is okay on the video, maybe you can give me a thumbs up or say yes or something just to let me know.

The audio will be fine on the actual podcast when I upload it because it's the much better quality really, that's all. That's the one thing about iPhones is the picture, although it's quite a dark room in here at night. I've got a big bright light over there ahead of me, in front of me, and I've got a normal light that's hanging from the ceiling.

I don't know why I expected that. But it's quite dark. Most lights hang from the ceiling, but it's still not like a brilliant picture because I'm watching it on my television and it's not like a great... it's a little bit grainy, but the sound isn't so good on the iPhone.

So I thought what I'll do today, tonight, it's nearly one o'clock or pretty much one o'clock. Yes, one o'clock exactly in the evening or in the morning of the 25th of May or something like that. So welcome to those of you that have tuned in.

And by the way, it doesn't matter if you don't get here at the beginning because it's just me chatting and I'm kind of the antidote to insomnia. And so I tell you about my boring life and just talk about stuff and you can kind of zone out and allow yourself to drift off. And I suppose part of the reason why I'm showing on the video is so that you can see that this is just me talking.

Talking and there really isn't any editing, although I might edit the audio the first little bit out because it's a little bit crackly and I was kind of over at the laptop and doing stuff. But generally, I don't know if you can see that. You see that there? I've had that.

It's a lump in my left arm. I've had that since, I think it was about 2004, probably. 2003, 2004.

I went to a doctor and I said, doctor, doctor. I didn't say doctor twice. I just said doctor.

Hello, doctor. And he said, yes, Mr. Newland. Actually, he said Mr. Newland.

I don't know if I mentioned, but people keep correcting me on the pronunciation of my own name. It's amazing. I found that I just spoke to the doctor.

I went, this happens on the phone, but it also happens in person as well. So I went to the doctor to get a letter. It's, I won't tell you what it's about.

It's personal. It's not really that personal, just about a bus pass. So I went to the doctor, surgery, spoke to the lady behind the counter.

And I always say behind the counter, never in front of the counter, are they? Never sitting on the counter, on the counter, laying there, watching EastEnders on telly, eating ice cream. But hey, enough of my fantasies. So I said to her, you know, I've just come here.

I didn't say that. I just, I didn't do any kind of introduction at all, really. It was just, would you do a letter for me, please? Get a letter.

It's an annual thing. And all I need to do is just reprint the same letter that they did every other year for the last four years and just put today's date on, not make today's, but whatever date that they do it, date on it. And they charged me £25 for that.

So it just means I can, it gives me, it just, just helps me. So that was the reason for it. Anyway, she said, what's your name? I said, it's Jason Newland.

And she looked through the computer like that, you know, tapping away. Okay. It was lower down.

So the keyboard wasn't near her face. Cause I'm just doing a face keyboard there. It wasn't a face.

She's not like really, she wasn't tiny, but, so we did this. She just checked on there and said, Oh, can you say your name again? I said, Jason Newland. She said, Oh, Jason Newland.

I just thought, okay, if you, if you must, it says an A there, not a U, that's fine. I always like to, I don't think it was fair, right? I think it's fair that I have a name that has an N at the end at the first name and then N at the beginning of the second name, the surname. So it means I'm sort of basically Jason Newland.

It's like one. For me, there needs to be a gap, not like a massive gap. I don't mean it.

My name's Jason Newland. You know, I don't, don't need to, there to be like a big, obvious gap, just enough of a gap. So there's an end of one because yeah, I think the only way you can really just do a normal name and just let it flow off your tongue, if it's Doris Parker, you know, it has to be Lord Stewart.

I'm just trying to think of names now, but you know, it's, it needs to be a different, has to start a different syllable, has to start separate. It's a different sound. It's the same sound at the end and the beginning.

It doesn't, just doesn't feel right. And I've had this name for 47, nearly 48 years, still doesn't feel right. Mind you, I didn't know what my surname was until I was about seven.

So, you know, I didn't really, it's a weird admission there, isn't it? I'll just let you know what day it is running around, doing stuff. My plan, and it's not much of a plan, but it is a plan nevertheless, is to maybe do a let me bore you to sleep session, maybe every evening, Monday to Thursday, Monday, Friday, one o'clock in the morning or one o'clock. Yeah.

Well, yeah, maybe five, maybe seven days a week, five days a week, something like that. And then I'll just do it for however long it lasts. It might last for 30 minutes.

It might last for 40 minutes, 50, 60, it might last. It really depends. I mean, the actual, the audio can last, I think I've got enough room on here for, I think about 24 hours worth of recording, something like that.

But when I go to upload it onto, he's distracting me. When I upload onto the podcast, SoundCloud only has a limit of, I think it's three hours or five. I don't know, whatever it is, it's less than 24 hours.

So I can't, I can't really upload really, really long ones, but there's a possibility that's him sneezing. He sneezes when he eats. See, I, you know what I noticed? I noticed this a few years ago, back in 2013, I think it was, or 2012.

I whistled then. In 2012, I was watching television. I was eating and I caught myself eating with my mouth open.

And I can honestly say, I never knew I did that. I've been brought up to eat with my mouth closed. You know, it's just natural.

I think most people are, I imagine. Seeing the contents of someone's mouth generally is perhaps not always the, depends what's in there, I suppose. But I don't know what that means, but it's, you know, I was, mind you, I was brought up to do lots of things I don't do and to not do lots of things I do do.

So, you know, who knows, but I might get a girlfriend one day. I might have a date. It seems kind of unnightly, but it's possible, you know, it's possible, could happen.

And I suppose I don't want to be remembered as the bloke that, you know, that one date that never went anywhere, but it was the, I don't even remember it as a weird date. So I'm just going to press the screen a minute. The YouTube, I'm filming this on my iPhone, but there's only 20% of the battery left.

So it could stop. It could just stop on its own. So I'm sorry about that if that happens.

If it happens, it happens. What I'll do is when it gets to 2%, I'll, I'll just stop this. And I might continue talking on the recorder.

Anyway, yeah, so I found myself, caught myself eating with my mouth open, but not just, it was like, really, it was, it was off-putting. I actually put myself off of eating. I distracted myself from enjoying the food that I had spent 10 minutes cooking.

Or actually it might have been spent 10 seconds unwrapping from the sandwich wrappers. If Andre decides he wants to climb up here, you might get to see him, but I'm just letting him do his thing. So some people might think, well, what are you doing? You're talking about nothing.

And what's this got to do with going to sleep? But the thing is, if you, Andre is trying to get up. Andre is coming up. Okay.

Actually at the moment he's sniffing my crotch. So he's, for those of you listening to this on the podcast or on the website, maybe check out the video on my YouTube channel. And not that you can, I'm not saying come and watch him sniffing my crotch.

That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that you're about to see the little boy climbing up for kisses. He's, it's quite weird, you know, sometimes he'll, he'll kiss me.

Yeah. And then he licks his bum to take away the taste. It's really weird.

So he's all wet as well. Why did you get so wet? You've been rolling around in your wee wee again. Say hello to the people on the camera.

Andre is always the star of any video that I've ever made. You know, he hasn't been on all my videos obviously because he's only born two and a half years ago and I've been making videos for 13 years or whatever. But I'm so glad that I have included him in some of the videos because you know, in the future I can look back and see the beautiful boy.

Oh, there's a bit of a weird shot of his balls. I'll hide that. Yeah.

You don't care. I think he's a bit of an exhibitionist. Aren't you? A bit of an exhibitionist.

Hello. So I should say hello to some of the people that will be watching this after it's gone out live. And some of my regular, I was going to say regular customers, but some of my, you know, the regular people, uh, some of my friends on YouTube that have been watching my videos for a long time, um, especially, you know, the ones that have joined me online in the past, like live on YouTube.

And we had some fun. I think last summer I was doing some videos, uh, some live broadcasts and, and yeah, so this is kind of, um, this is like a, a kind of similar thing, but in the same sense as me just talking at the same time, it's just me just talking about stuff. And, and, you know, some people, as I was starting to say that some people may think, well, why you just, but JJ, you're just talking about nothing.

Why, how can that be of any use to anybody? What's that got to do with sleeping and all that stuff? The thing is, is you start to get used to my voice, start to get used to listening to me and the feelings that you have when you listen to me and it can feel relaxing. And just as I said, relaxing, I've got this real urge to fart, but I'm not going to, so I'm just going to, you know, when you get a fart, it's ready to go, but you know, you can push it back in. It's like you push it back into his pocket and just like that little fart pocket that we all have, just push it in there.

But you know that maybe as long as I sit still, as long as I don't move too much and don't eat anything or perhaps drink anything that could cause gas, then I'll be all right. Going back to my name, it's Jason Newland. See, my dad named me right after a character called Jason King, who was, he was a TV, he was like a TV detective thing, you know, in the sixties.

So I was born in 1970. So I think in the late sixties or middle sixties, whenever there was this very dapper, I think he was English and he had this moustache and he was a ladies man and it was all un-PC, you know, how it was back then. And apparently people used to call my dad Jason King.

And incidentally, the character that played Jason King, the actor, he actually died recently. It's not really anything to do with the story, but I'd like to add some kind of facts in there. I'm kind of like a Wikipedia, but I suppose a Wikipedia, you need to check on Wikipedia, check that what I'm saying is true, but then what does it matter really? Anyway, my dad, he, when he had me, well, no, he didn't, you know, when his sperm, you know, became a baby and I popped out.

It's kind of weird, isn't it? Imagine if you're a baby, the first thing you hear is screaming. Cause you know, I've never been in a pregnancy ward room, operation room, you know, where there's been babies. I can only just imagine the mess, but, and I can't watch it on telly.

I don't know why. I'm a little bit squeamish. I can watch open heart surgery or brain surgery, but babies being born, I don't know why.

I suppose I'm quite squeamish when it comes to anything to do with the testicles, you know, anything, operations and stuff. Cause I do like watching documentaries. I like to try and learn.

I figure if I'm going to sit in front of a television for hours on end, I might as well try and at least learn something, you know? So, you know, I do, I like to watch documentaries and yeah, I'm not really, you know, so I just, that's it really. That was the end of that. What was I talking about? Jason King, being born, operating theatres, moustaches, that's it.

So my dad had a moustache and when I was born, I had this big moustache. No, I didn't. And so he called me Jason after Jason King.

Okay. And my middle name's Richard, after nobody, just Richard. There was no one in the family, nobody, anything called Richard.

My two brothers, my oldest brother was named after a member of the family as well as his second name. My second oldest brother, his name, first and second name were both, his first and middle name rather, were both named after members of the family. I was named after a fictional character on a black and white television.

I don't really get it. And I mean, with Andre, you know, I've got a little, my little ferret, I've got, you know, I'm a little boy. He's my son.

It's funny, you know, it's the way I see it. He's my boy. So I got him and a really big event was what name to give him.

What shall I name him? He's my boy. He's my son. I'm going to be with him for the next 10 years, maybe, you know, I'll be, I'll be pretty much a pensioner when he's a pensioner, you know, although he's now get to teenage years, but he's, you know, we're together to the end, you know, and I didn't just think, oh no, I'll call him Noddy.

Or I didn't even think, oh, wait a minute. I used to love Sapphire and Steel, so I'll call him, call him Steel. No, and I did love Sapphire and Steel.

That was one of my favourite television programmes. You know, should I call him Danger Mouse? No, I didn't. You know, I didn't call him a silly name.

I thought, I'll call him, some people say, when they hear Andre, they say, oh, you mean Andre, some people say Andre Agassi. And other people say and something Andre, what was his name, he's a singer, Peter Andre. Did you name him after Peter Andre? Why would I name him after Peter Andre? Just seems like a bit random to, and if I did, I probably wouldn't admit to it because it would, you know, for those of you who don't know who Peter Andre is, he's, he was a really big pop star in the 90s.

And he had like a perfect body, you know, all muscles and he's really good. I liked him. Yeah, I really liked his songs.

He's a mysterious girl and a few other songs, but he was really, really popular. And then he made, he went into the, who won't know? Celebrity jungle thing, let me out of here. So he went into there and he had a big resurgence of his career.

And again, he took his clothes off and he was still really muscular. And, and that's the main reason I think a lot of people watched the show. He was in the shower and this has come across wrong.

So I didn't, I didn't name him after Peter Andre regardless of how muscular Peter Andre is. And he's also, I just want to talk about Peter Andre now for some reason. I think what's quite nice about Peter Andre is he comes to me, he comes across as really nice as a person, a really gentle, genuine kind of person.

And I suppose I feel, I feel quite connected to him in a sense of got similar bodies, you know, six pack, you know, pretty much just muscle all the way through really. And, uh, both look a lot younger than what we are and both have beautiful voices. Okay.

We're not that similar, but you know, there are some similarities, I suppose. Um, we have the same color hair kind of, although I don't know. He might dye his.

Anyway, I didn't call Andre, Andre after Peter Andre. I called him Andre after my friend who's called Andre, who I was best friends with in the nineties, in the early nineties or middle nineties. I worked with him.

I lived with him and not romantically. I just, I lived in a house, shared a house with him. And we became best friends.

He was actually, first of all, we were work colleagues. And then he became the manager or supervisor. When the supervisor we had, um, lost his job because he went to prison for doing a bomb scare.

But he phoned up train station to say that there was a bomb on one of the trains and you went to prison, you know, you kind of can't get away with that stuff, but he did it. He just wanted his girlfriend to not leave him. He wanted to stop her from leaving London.

And he wanted to try it. It was a kind of a romantic thing, you know, he was trying to sort of stop the train so we could go in there. And, um, you know, so I've got one person, Psytron, Psytron, Psytron saying, hello.

Hi. Can you let me know, um, can you hear me? Okay. Is the sound okay on, on the YouTube, on the YouTube? If you can say yes, or that'd be really cool.

Just so I know it sounds okay. Sounds great. That's brilliant.

Thank you. And I'm probably, I've got maybe about 10 minutes left before the battery runs out, which is a shame, but there's nothing I can do about that. But I will probably continue talking.

So the rest of the recording will be on the podcast. Or I might just bring it to an end, uh, sort of kind of a short session, but maybe look to do another one tomorrow at 1 a.m. in the morning. So I think that's when I realized years ago that actually, not every, things aren't always as they seem, you know, like this person from the outside, say, oh, this man, he phoned up and, um, said there was a bomb on a train and there wasn't, it was a hoax.

There wasn't a bomb on the train. And he, he went to prison for, I don't know, six months or something, lost his job, lost everything pretty much. It's not a very happy story, but there are some facts that are missing that people, you know, it's a long, long time ago.

He was a really, really nice person. Really lovely person, the kind of person you'd meet soft, gentle, kind, loving, giving, caring, you know, really, really nice person who did something really silly once. And I don't know, just, I've not really thought about it for a long time.

I actually saw him probably about a year later and he's, he said hello to me and he was, he looked like a broken man. He looked like he's, and he hadn't, yeah, I feel quite sad when I think about it. Anyway, Andre became my supervisor because he left because, uh, and Andre was, he was funny because there's a few reasons why I didn't really think about this.

I spoke to another friend and he reminded me because he also knew Andre. So Andre used to go out with his sister. No, Andre was his, no, Andre wasn't his sister.

Let me get this right in there. Andre's sister used to live with my other friend and Andre used to live with them. That's it.

Then, oh, by the way, if you like this, please click the thumbs up button. And leave a comment, say hi or something for those of you that are watching after the broadcast. But come back tomorrow, one o'clock in the morning, 1am tomorrow, UK time, I will be here.

And yes, Andre lived, his sister went out with my friend. And the people in the place that we worked, they used to call him No Legs. Now he did have legs, so it wasn't like a disabled or being horrible to him for a disability or anything like that.

He's just, they called him No Legs because they were making fun of him being short. Yeah, he wasn't short because he was pretty much, he might have even been taller than me. I'm 5'8".

I'm not, I'm not tall, but I'm not really short. I'm kind of below average height. I think the average height is about 5'10", for the average male in this country.

So I'm below, but I'm not that much below. He was about the same. He might have even been 5'9".

But for some, because he was, he walked around a bit like Popeye. It's like his upper body, like he was big and muscular. And he was muscular, but he wasn't big.

He was, I don't know, it's hard to explain, but it was funny to watch. And we became really good friends. And I ended up, well, anyway, that's the, I'll tell you the story.

That's why I called Andre, Andre, because I lost contact with my friend Andre a long time ago after moving to Ireland and actually living with him and his family. So pretty close. And, but I just didn't, I didn't want to stay there because I was struggling a bit, like with just depression and stuff like that.

So I came back to London and I found out later, I did visit, I went back and visited the next year, but then I found out that he'd, he was passed away. He's gone dead. And so I called Andre, Andre for that reason, you know, as a tribute to him.

And my other, as I said, my friend who's, he used to date his sister, he dated his, Andre's sister. He said, oh yeah, do you call him that because he's got little legs? Because a ferret, ferrets have got little legs. And I said, no, no, but it was funny.

He's like, no, it's not the reason because he's got little legs. Although that's what they used to call Andre, little legs. And in the canteen, I used to get called professor by the canteen staff because I wore glasses.

So it's, you know, you get, we get stuck with these names. They were worse names. They really are worse names.

And I didn't have a, there was people out there with some really, really, really bad names. There's one called Bungalow Bill. It's something to do with everything was downstairs.

I think that's where he kept everything. I don't know, it's sort of a kind of weird thing, but I think it was something called sick note. It was like, oh, it was ill.

Yeah. Anyway, Andre, because back in those days, back in 93, 92, whatever year it was, 92, 93, I didn't make any effort. I didn't want to see people outside of work.

I'd see them, as far as I was concerned, if I'm standing next to someone for eight hours a day, five days, six days a week, that's enough. You know, it's kind of, to me, that would be, in my mind at the time, it's like, if you've got diarrhea and you have a little break from the diarrhea, you don't want to go and sit on the toilet. You know, it's, for me, going home was a rest.

It was a break from the people. It's not, I didn't dislike them. It's just, it was nice to get away from them.

But one day, Andre, and another person I worked with, followed me home because I always refused to tell them where I lived. And they followed me, didn't even know they were following me. And I got home, a couple of minutes later, there's a knock at the door.

And there they were, laughing and basically just saying, we know where you live now. You've got no excuse not to come out to play and to go to the pub and to do the things that most young people do. I was only 22.

Most 22-year-olds are kind of out, doing stuff, not sitting at home watching telly, which is what, it's what I still do. But so I started going out and drinking with Andre and hanging out with him. And for the first time in my life, I actually had a group of friends that I used to spend time with outside of the comedy clubs and stuff, because I didn't really, I used to see comedians at the weekend and people on the circuit.

And some of them I used to chat to, some of them I was friends with. But I didn't, it was kind of a social situation, but I didn't have any telephone numbers of anybody really, a couple. But we didn't have mobile phones back then.

Didn't have the internet back then. It really was a case of just turning up at a comedy club, comedy store, looking at a timeout magazine. It's a London magazine.

It tells you what's going on around London. So I'd just find out, so, oh, Nick Realty, I'll go and see him. He's at the Soho Ho Comedy Club, and I'll go there and see him Saturday.

Or maybe I'll go and see Mark Thomas or Dennis Leary's on a comedy store. I'll go and watch him. And, you know, that was nice, but I didn't, I don't think I, a lot of them really respected me because I don't think they really liked what I used to do on stage.

And so this was kind of the first time that I really had a collection of friends outside of when I was at school, but as a group, you know, as an adult where there was a few of us that all kind of pretty much got on with each other separately, as well as together collectively. And I was always the outsider, but I've always been the outsider, which is okay. You know, it's, I kind of understand it a bit more now, but I don't, I thought it was a struggle to, it was a struggle to kind of really get too involved with people.

And I mean, some of it is probably a lack of interest in other people. And it's not, it's not, it's not something I'm proud of. It's not something that I enjoy, you know, it's just, and it's not that I don't care.

It's just, I don't care. It's not, there's two different, I think there's different ways of caring. I do care about the wellbeing of people.

I do, you know, I care about the world and society and the welfare, people's welfare, generally. I care about what's going on in my town, in my, you know, just, you know, I want people to be safe and feel safe. But I suppose I'm a bit like an ambulance, like a paramedic or a fire person, you know, I kind of, in a thinking way, it's like, once they're okay, let's move on and just leave them.

And they'll, you know, just be there for the emergencies and except I'm not there for any emergencies either. So I suppose I'm nothing like that. Plus I can't drive.

I can't drive. And I don't know anything about, I know a little bit about fires, but very little. Had some fire training, some first aid training.

I don't know why I'm telling you this. So yeah, Andre, he was a good bloke. He was a good, good person.

He's, he was Irish. I'm not saying that in a derogatory term. He was, because my heritage is part Irish.

I think I tapped into, with him, maybe tapped into that part of me because my grandmother, her parents were Irish. So she was born, yeah, she was Irish pretty much, I suppose. If both your parents are Irish, then you're Irish, aren't you? Yeah.

So I'm maybe a quarter Irish or something, half Irish. I'm not sure how it works, but which half? Yeah. So this, I'm not sure if I'll do another video.

I think it's a little bit distracting, distract me a little bit from doing the, you know, normally I just lay back in the chair, like recline it and just talk for, well, maybe an hour, 30 minutes, 40 minutes, hour, sometimes an hour and a half, you know, depending. And the video's ended, so I just, I think I'll just continue talking. So sometimes I think having a video on, although it's finished now, so those that were watching is, it might not even, I don't know, I'm not sure if it will save itself or not, but having it on the TV, seeing my face on the iPhone, it's all a little bit distracting.

Having a big bright light shining in my face, it's a lot less, I don't know, it's just a bit, there's a lot different from how I've done all the other, let me bore you to sleep sessions. I've done a few now, I don't know, what, 23 or whatever. Normally I just lay back in this big black squeaky chair and just talk.

And although I have done that, I mean, I have, I have talked and just, maybe I've just done the same, but I know, I guess I've got a little bit distracted, but then I suppose it's like with anything, isn't it? You start getting used to it and maybe I can maybe just ignore the fact that I'm filming myself. Maybe that can be a way of doing it, or maybe even better, maybe I'll just get used to it and forget and just be able to talk naturally. Although I think I have talked naturally, I just haven't done one of these sessions for, I think it's two weeks now.

And there is a reason behind it. Although I did do a hypnotic buffet on Monday, so it's Friday now. I did a hypnotic buffet on, I think it was Monday, it might've been a different day, but I think I did it on Monday.

I hadn't done one of those for over a week. It's because I did a Let Me Boy To Sleep session a couple of weeks ago, and it was an hour and a half. And I mean, it's only my opinion, but it was, I would say it was quite a good session, quite good recording, good audio.

And the recorder didn't record it properly. The SD card was too full and there wasn't enough space on the SD card to save it all, which meant I lost the whole hour and a half, which just annoyed me. Really, really, really annoyed me.

Luckily, well no, I lost that, but then I found I did have another SD card, which was a lot, lot bigger, like really like 64 gigabyte one or something, which means I can talk for hours and hours, although I won't, but I have the ability and capacity on the SD card to record myself without it ever cutting off. But I kind of felt a little bit deflated after doing that recording. And I'd been on, I felt like I was on a bit of a roll with the Let Me Bore You to Sleep sessions, because I've been doing them fairly regularly for, I mean, maybe not every day, but they were getting quite regular.

I was doing quite a few a week and I was really relaxing into them and just telling stories and telling silly, just talking about silly things and just taking up time, really, I suppose in some ways. But then, yeah, I felt a little bit deflated by it. But there's been other stuff that I've been doing in the last couple of weeks.

I've really been working on my website, been trying to get everything all sorted and I've now, it's not all finished yet, but it's nearing completion as far as what I've been working on. So every single session that I've ever done or that's available, I've lost stuff over the years, but all the stuff that's available is available to download as an MP3 for free. And there's a download MP3 link on each session.

This is on my website. There's also, you can stream the session either, there's two streaming boxes. One is for SoundCloud and the other is for another one that I've forgotten at the moment, but it's another podcast I've got.

So it just means that it just gives you more options to stream if you want to stream or just to download if you want to download. Maybe, maybe if I start doing these videos, maybe I'll start putting the video on as well onto the page. And so I've been doing that for all of my sessions.

So it's quite a time consuming exercise to do this. So I've done most of them. I'm now on the, under, I've got every single one available to download free.

I've been adding the stream boxes, the streams to each session. So I'm now doing the under 30 minute or under 20 minutes relaxation sessions. I think there's about 128 of those to do.

So I'm probably about 30 in. So it's still quite a few. And then I've got the over 20 minutes, which is about another 70.

And then I've got the, I think the sleep insomnia sessions, unless I've already done those, I'm not sure. So there's probably a few more days work at that. Then I'm going to need to go and do the, what's it called? Or the SEO side of things.

You know, sort of naming the pages and doing tags and all that stuff. So again, that's another few weeks worth of work. So I'll just do that gradually.

Another thing that I'm doing is I'm actually, I've been transcribing in my sessions. I've got a dragon software, which is, you know, you can record your voice and it turns it into text. But instead of me talking into it and then recording it as I do it, I just transcribe from an audio that's already been recorded.

And especially now as the recordings are a lot clearer than some of the older stuff that I used to do, I'm able to get quite a good, you know, transcription. There's still editing to do, there's still changing words and correcting stuff. But you know, it takes, it just cuts down the amount of work by probably hundreds of hours with it all.

I mean, it takes a long time to transcribe. Well, I always found it took a long time to transcribe from, you know, listening to something and then typing it in. So that's what I'm doing.

And then I'm thinking of, with all the standard stuff, that's like sleep hypnosis, um, course that I might have done, a seven day or seven week sleep hypnosis course. So I'm going to try, I've transcribed those and I will add that transcription to the pages of the website, as well as to the podcast as well. And probably to the YouTube videos.

With the hypnotic buffet, I think I might use some of those transcriptions to help with a book, you know, towards maybe one of my first books. And I'm going to be transcribing these as well. These let me boy to sleep sessions.

I'm not sure what to do with them. Maybe I don't know, because they last so long. Sometimes there's probably not enough room really to put them onto the website.

I mean, it may be the website, but probably not enough room to put them onto the podcast, to put all that text on there. Wouldn't be enough room to put it all onto YouTube because there's a limit to how much writing or text you can put on there. But I can put some of it on there, I suppose.

And then I've been thinking about, what can I do with the first book that I want to write? I want to talk about my, I've had a few ideas. I want to do some kind of therapeutic books, but at the same time, I want to talk about this free hypnosis service that I've been running online since 2006. And I just want to just talk about that and just go through the journey really.

There's been some interesting moments and some challenging moments as well. So I might just, you know, it won't be a big, hefty book. It'll be maybe a hundred pages.

I'm not, I'm not looking to do some kind of really big book, just something that would be a nice light read. I think anything that I write, it needs to be a light read. It doesn't have to be really, maybe not light emotionally, but not some big complicated book.

You know, I say complicated, it's not, I don't mean complicated as in not able to understand, but it's just, I write the way I talk and I talk the way I think. So, and I don't, I don't, there's some words that I don't, I think that I use very, very, I'm very basic with the words that I use. In, you know, I think the way I speak can pretty much reach anybody.

And of course, there are going to be some people where the meanings of words may be different where you are and you may be in a country where, um, I don't know, for example, if I said that I, I had dinner with my girlfriend's parents and we were in a restaurant with my girlfriend and her parents. And as we went to the table, her parents, both her parents sat down and I patted my girlfriend's, uh, I kind of gave her a pat on the fanny, patted her fanny with my hand.

See in America, you might think, well, okay, it's still, it's a bit fresh, but you know, if you patted her on her bum, bottom, maybe the parents wouldn't have seen it because you were facing them and your hand was behind them.

But in England, fanny doesn't mean bottom. I won't go any further than that. You can sort of check that out if you want, you can Google that.

So it's, you know, some of the things I say, um, there might be a different meaning where you are. Um, but it's really, I'm sitting here and my throat is all dry. Yeah.

I've got a drink right next to me. How lazy is that? I just can't be bothered to reach over and get it. So I don't know.

I'm not quite sure. This is a bit of a, a bit of an unusual session. I think today a little bit, but it's been okay.

And the whole point is for you to be bored. And I've talked about my life and my life is boring. It has always has been.

So it's good that I can just talk about it. And sometimes I notice now that I do tell people, you know, warn them before I start that the story is going to be boring. However, I'll just continue because I want to tell that story because I don't want exciting stories in my life.

I don't want drama. I'm quite happy to have a little bit of boredom there. A bit of, it's not, it wasn't necessarily boring to live it, but it's quite boring to hear about it.

It's not necessarily exciting to hear about. I can't imagine that any movie producer is going to want to, you know, make a movie about my life. It really is not be, it's not that kind of a kind of exciting life, which is okay.

I've had my moments, but generally pretty boring. I just like silly things. I like silliness.

I don't want drama. I don't want any kind of aggro, just, just silly things. It's something to laugh at.

So that's kind of, that's it for today. That's this session done. So it's, it's maybe it's, it was a bit more weirder for me than it was for you listening to this because I had the distractions of the video camera and the TV screen and the iPad, which was a bit pointless having that on because I couldn't see anything anyway.

And I only had, I think four, the maximum four viewers, but it was live. So there's no reason for anyone to really know that I was on there. So yeah, it was okay.

It's all okay. But I did say, didn't I, on, on the, on the video, well on the YouTube live, didn't I say I was going to be here at one o'clock in the morning tomorrow? Oh no. What have I done? Oh, why not? It's a fairly good time of the day to do it.

It's pretty quiet. I'm usually awake at this time anyway. In fact, I think I'm going to have a choc-ice.

I'm going to treat myself to a choc-ice. Yeah. Oh yeah.

So that's the end of this. Let me bore you to sleep. And please remember to visit my website, jasonnewland.com. See if you're still awake or not.

And then everything's on there that you could ever want. Apart from the things that maybe you want that aren't on there. But there's lots of stuff.

And check it out. You never know. You might find things on there that are useful to you that you didn't know existed, you know, that you didn't know that were available for me anyway.

And because I don't remember most of what I've done, as far as the content of the videos or recordings that I've made over the years. But there are some pretty good sessions that I remember, you know, after doing them, after recording them, thinking, oh, that was really, you know, really flowed well. And I was pleased with the content and the things I was saying.

And, you know, I was really pleased with the sessions. And some sessions I've uploaded to YouTube, you know, in the past, and they were really popular, really popular. And previous YouTube channels that I've had.

So I can't really remember which ones were which. But you know, for people who've got chronic pain, what I would say for anybody or any issue the person's got, that's my toes cracking there. Whatever the issue that you or I have is, if you listen, you know, every day, just listen to me listen to the sessions I do and changes happen.

And it's not as if, you know, you might not have even decided to listen to me because of wanting to change something particular. But that thing may change on its own. Because of the space that we're sharing.

Because changes, if you're in a safe space, changes occur naturally. And I suppose in a way, that's why I perhaps, perhaps, is why I open up about some of the things that happened in my life. I do also tell silly stories as well.

But I think the silly stories are quite obvious, which ones are silly and which ones are, you know, more serious, or more real. Like earlier talking about Andre, and the naming of my boy, you know, Andre. In fact, if I'd have had a human son, though my son is a ferret, if I'd had a human, I may well have called him Andre.

Or Elvis. I think Elvis is the best name. Why aren't more people called Elvis? Or Jason Jr. Now that's a good name.

Jason Jr. He won't have to do much in his life to outdo me, you know. So it's not like he'll ever, it's not like, you know, someone that's really famous and they get called Junior and then, oh how am I going to outshadow, you know, my father outshadows them. Wouldn't happen with me.

I'm just this random person, like an anonymous person that makes these audios that people from all around the world listen to. But the more I've gone towards the audio rather than the video is, I guess, the less people even know what I look like really. More sort of, more to do with how I sound than how I look.

Although I think it's always been more to do with how I sound. Apart from when I was doing the modeling. That was a lie.

That was, see you knew that was a lie. I didn't have to even tell you that I was never a model. I always think if you're gonna tell an untruth, make it silly.

Therefore it's not a lie. You know, if you're not trying to get something out of somebody, you know, you're not knocking on someone's door saying, oh I need money because my relative's in hospital and, you know, I need to get to them and all that and in order to get money so they can do something else with the money and maybe they don't even have an uncle. That's a lie.

I'll be telling you I used to be a model, a Calvin Klein. Of course I used to have to shave my knuckles and my knees, my kneecaps. I haven't got bad legs really, all things considered.

My legs are okay. I'm more top heavy. So I haven't got like tiny legs but I haven't got big legs.

I'm kind of just okay-sized legs but I'm more upper, upper body, you know, top heavy. But top heavy is cool, I think. Right, I do believe that that is it.

But, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, I am thinking of maybe I'll do another one of these tomorrow. One o'clock a.m. UK time. So I guess technically that'll be Sunday morning.

One o'clock because we're now on Saturday morning. One a.m. UK time. Live on YouTube.

I'll give it another go on YouTube. I'll make sure the phone is completely all charged up so it'll, you know, play for the whole time. I'll turn the television off so that's not a distraction.

I won't have the iPad so I'll just have the camera and yeah, maybe go from there. Give another try. Maybe.

Maybe. Yeah, maybe. So my name is Jason Newland and this is jasonnewland.com. Let me bore you to sleep, number, whatever number it was.

Thank you for listening and if you're watching on YouTube or if you go and watch it on YouTube, of course the whole recording isn't on there, but there's still nearly about an hour's worth. And I will see you, speak to you next time. Lots of love.

Bye.