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Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. This is Let Me Bore You To Sleep with Andre the Ferret acting very excitedly in the background because he's at it again with his girlfriend. He was fast asleep.
Well, I was sitting down in my chair, he was asleep in his sleeping place and I get out of the chair and straight away he runs at me. Sort of, what are you doing daddy? What are you doing daddy? Where are we going? We're not going anywhere. Why not? Why not? I'm gonna tell you why not in a minute.
First of all, only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes. I actually took him, he was hassling me to take him out for a walk. This was about um eight o'clock.
No, yeah, six o'clock. I don't know. It was a time.
It was, you know, if you looked at a clock you would have seen, well you wouldn't have seen the hands pointing because they don't do that anymore do they? See the bunch of numbers? Anyway, the time, you know, the specific time is not really relevant to the story. It's not really a story but it's something that happened. Anyway, hassling me.
Take me out dad. Take me out dad. Like that.
So I do. I think, okay, I will. I'll take you out.
I love the little furry poo bag. I do. And I'll take him out.
I will. However, you know, it's been windy, rainy, but proper windy all day long. So I haven't really felt like going out myself.
You know, it's, it is a bit easier when it's nice outside. And then, and then, so I get me jacket on and I put his, what's it, you know, his, oh, it's too, even too boring for me to talk. And I put his little, it's not really a lead.
It's, it goes across his chest as well. But I need a new one for him. Also, I need a new bag.
His bag is just ripped a bit. So I can't put him in it anymore because he keeps getting caught in his, in his nails. Even, even when his nails are short, because I cut his nails today.
One now grew extra long. How weird is that? Out of all five of his fingernails, well, you know, including thumbs, of course, one was probably a third longer than all the others. And you might say, oh, that's because you just didn't cut it last time.
No, it might be the case, actually, but it's, you know, forgetting that because I might not have cut that one as short as the rest, but I definitely didn't leave. I mean, to be that long, it was basically, it's left holes in the carpet. And, you know, the other day I was doing some knitting and I realized that I wasn't using one of the knitting needles.
It was his nail. I was knitting with one of his fingernails. I don't knit.
I don't know why I'm talking about that. So besides, whenever I cut his fingernails, I'm quite a thorough when I do stuff. And I'm very careful when it comes to him because I have made him bleed in the past.
I hit him with a hammer. No, I didn't. I made him bleed because when I cut his fingernails, he, if it gets too close to the core, there's like a black bit in his fingernails.
If it cuts into that, it bleeds. It's just, it's a bit uncomfortable for him, but it doesn't, it's not, I don't think it's like painful, painful, but I don't, you know, the last thing I want to do is cause him any discomfort. Not the last thing I want to do, like, you know, the last thing I want to do is jump out of a plane without a parachute.
Really, Andre? Really? Did you have to do that right here? He's running out of things to use as the body for his girlfriend. It gets confused sometimes and yeah, I'm quite a thorough. So when I did cut his fingernails, I always check them afterwards to make sure that there's nothing sticking out, that it's not broken, you know, cause he could get his nails caught on something if it's split.
So I always check, always, every single time, make sure that each one is done and, you know, plus he wriggles a lot. So it kind of, I have to sort of check and also it annoys him a bit. So I just take my time and I really don't know what he's doing.
He keeps running around, running from one room to the other, but now he's going to get some dry food. Anyway, cause he's turning into the Andre, the Andre show. I, anyway, I cut his nails, but I took him out for a walk and carried him downstairs.
Like normally we're wiggling to get down. Like he was so impatient to get, to get on the floor to walk, but I carry him until I get to the front door, the, I don't know what you call it, the shared front door to the building and go outside and put him down. He's sniffing around and we go out and then one of the other people that lives in the building sort of turned the corner.
So I jumped about 10 foot out of the way, very dramatic, just to get away from them. And I said, you all right then? Yeah, that was it. And then I sort of turn a corner and Andre's not following me.
I go around and Andre's pulling against the lead. So I thought I'll just, he clearly wants to go and have a sniff around. He leads me back to the front door to get back inside the building.
He didn't like it out there because it was too windy and a bit cold. He was outside for about one minute. He'd been asking me hours to go for a walk and he was outside for one minute and he dragged me.
Literally, you could see the trails of my feet in the concrete. He was dragging me so hard to get back inside the building. He literally walked through the door.
The door was closed. He walked through the actual wood. And with me behind us, you just see a, you see a shape of him.
And then you see a shape of me. It's basically, it's like a shape of a little ferret and there's a, to the side of it is a big belly. Anyway, so I take him back upstairs.
I'm laughing in like, it's ridiculous. After all that hassle, it took longer to get ready to take him out than it did. Then he was actually out.
So I come indoors, close the door, lock it, you know, normal stuff, take his lead off, put my coat on the thing. And he's standing there, looking at the front door. And I could see that he was confused now as to what to do.
Because he's so used to scratching at the door to get out. But now he didn't want to go out, but he still wanted to go out. It was really, he kept looking at the door, turning back and going back to the front door.
Oh, I don't know what to do here. Confused himself. And I find it funny.
Because literally five minutes earlier, he was putting his hands against my legs trying to get me to pick him up and take him out. He didn't even last a minute. He wears a fur coat all year round.
He's such a little baby. Bless him. So yeah, it's, he's been pretty good though, because a couple of days ago, he was being very bitey.
But I think after I've dealt with him on that day, and I think he's been, he's okay since then. He's been pretty good. He was sleeping with me.
He's been sleeping on the bed today. Not really sure why, but he goes through. I think it's, he must think it's winter again, because of the temperature outside, or I don't know.
Because he loves being in that bed, or on the bed, or underneath the covers during the winter. Doesn't do it so much in the summer. But in the winter, he loves having the bed all to himself, the double bed just for him.
And you know, when he was little, I used to get into bed, and I'd like to be really careful. And you know, because I'd be just, because I don't want to crush him. I'd like to be free.
Now I just, I just lay on him. If he's in the way, I don't care anymore. Dear Jason, we did not find it very funny when you said that you liked crushing your ferret.
Mmm. So that's that noise of him eating. I've got a friend who gets really annoyed with her husband eating yoghurt.
And I always find it a bit silly, like to get upset with someone eating. And I hear him crunching away. At least he's not farting.
That's the main thing, isn't it? Oh, Andre. I can't believe it. He said that's for Jackson.
What do you mean? Happy birthday, Jackson. Here's a big fart. Andre, you're so rude.
Farting like that. I do apologize, ladies and gentlemen. Man.
So today, I ain't done much. I say today is now Monday. But yesterday, Sunday, didn't do an awful lot.
Just be working on the website, getting the pages updated, you know, the products so that you can download them easier and have us, you can stream the recordings and all that stuff. All that good stuff. But it's time consuming.
I've done all the Let Me Boy To Sleep ones. And I've done all the Sleep Hypnosis Weekly ones. So that's two podcasts I've completed.
I've now started on the relaxation for stress. And there's 125 or something of those. And then I'll do the Deep Sleep Whisper ones.
And there's 220. So that's quite a few. So it's going to be a few more days.
I can't just sit there for hours and hours doing it. I try, but it's just so boring. It takes concentration, but concentrate in doing something that's boring, if you know what I mean.
And the process is I go to the website itself. I copy the title of the thing, of the product. I go to the website where I build the pages, search for it, open that up.
Then I take away the in the body of the text, I take that away and put it into the, the, I forget what it's called now. The, it's part of like the Google, you know, so they can register it. And then I go to the podcast on speaker, I open it up.
I'll copy the code for the player. And then I embed it into the body of that page. And then I add an image, which is to download free and a big arrow.
And then I copy the link and post the link into that image. And I click Save, and repeat hundreds and hundreds of times. So as you can see, it's very, it's repetitive, it's boring, but at the same time, I need to make sure I do it correctly.
And the more boring it becomes, the less sometimes I just, I'm missing bits out, I have to keep going back. But it's okay. It's all right.
Yeah. Yeah. It's not too bad.
Yeah. So it's a case of just getting on with it. 395 I think this is number 396 of the Let Me Bore You To Sleep 396.
So that's probably about 450 hours. That's a lot of nonsense in there. So a lot of pointless jabber jabber, jabber jabber, or jingle jangle.
A lot of jingle jangle that I've been dropping out of my mouth over the last two years, two years, three years. It's the beginning of 2018. 1920.
So 1892. I think it was about February, February. So March, April, May.
So two years and three months, two and a third, two and a third, three, six, nine, two and a quarter years. Three, six, nine, 12. I really wish I hadn't said that out loud.
So you didn't realize my level of mathematics. So yeah, I've just been doing that on the website and been listening to some recordings. Not my recordings.
There's a few, I mention sometimes the stuff that I like to listen to. Now we see this cage. It's climbed all the way up just to look out of the top window.
Now it's climbed down again. And now he's grabbed the slipper, shook it, and then he's run off. And now he's going to have some food again.
I don't understand him. Apart from this bit, him being a bit, you know, a bit energetic. I don't, you know, I don't mind anything he does generally, but wasn't crazily happy about him getting all bitey the other day.
Because it's not something that he normally does. But I showed him he was boss. I did.
I showed him, well basically I showed him my birth certificate and showed him his. I said, look, I've been around a lot longer than you. And he started laughing.
I said, well, I didn't know he was that old. He always manages to find a way to put me down, make fun of me. It's not fair.
You're ancient. So he said, as you said to me, Daddy, I said, yes. He said, what was Jesus like? And I have to say, I wasn't around then.
I'm not that old. He's just, he just comes out with these things out of the blue, just trying to sort of make fun of my age. It's not fair.
He's not fair. No, I don't mind. He's a good boy generally.
He's a good, he's a big boy now. She's a strong girl, only the strong can survive, living in the land of la la. Now who recognizes that song? I bet not many people do.
I do. Of course I do, because I just sang it. But living in the land of la la.
Here's another song. Let's see if you can recognize this. What album is this of? It's an album song.
Look, I suppose all songs are album songs, apart from the ones that aren't. But, you know, it wasn't a released song. And what was it? I'm trying to think.
I can't. I was listening to End Ups the other day. I went through a period where I really loved listening to End Ups, the band.
I don't know why. It's not really my thing. But it was so, I just enjoyed it.
This is probably, wow, it's got to be about 10 years ago now, I suppose. Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh. And yeah, I liked them.
Yeah, so I was listening to Bob Proctor earlier. Bob Proctor. I came across him when I was looking for people that I didn't know about.
Unfortunately, if you put in people I don't know about into Google, it's quite a big search. But I was looking for someone that was like a motivational speaker. And he was more to do with the, you know, like the secret.
He was the main person on the secret, the movie. And again, that's over 10 years ago, isn't it? And I remember I watched that movie. It was on YouTube, it was on online, The Secret.
And they didn't actually give the secret. It's like an hour and a half of how great the secret was, but without telling you what the actual secret was, which was mildly annoying. I now know what the secret is.
But I had to, I had to find out. But Bob Proctor is one of the people from that. And it's really good.
It seems a bit grumpy, though. He is 85 now. It seems, I don't know.
I've seen, he's been doing this for 40, 50 years or something. And I like listening to him because he really knows what he's talking about. And he's, you know, he's embraced the subject.
Basically, you become what you think about is, that's kind of what the whole thing is based around. His teachings, I say teachings, his talks and seminars and stuff. You become what you think about.
And what are you doing, Andre? He actually said to me, does that mean you're a boobie then, daddy? You're a boobie. That is so rude. You are what you think about.
Andre, stop being naughty. Bloody ferret. Not being naughty.
I'm just acting naturally. Yeah, okay. Show me a ferret in the wild that makes love to a slipper.
I say make dances to a slipper. I say dances. He doesn't know what he's doing.
He's really running around. He wants something that I don't think he knows what it is he wants. I don't know what I want to do.
I want to give him a bath. He's looking for something. But he's trying to find it by smell.
I don't know what it is he's looking for. Oh, well. So I was listening to Bob Proctor earlier.
His footsteps are getting louder in my ear. I feel like he's like banging a drum in my ear, on my ear. Seriously, just banging a drum on my ear.
That doesn't make sense. But can you imagine how funny with that? Well, not funny, but I started shouting, you know, I'm sort of trying to do a relaxation session. I start, Andre.
I don't think I've got any messages to read out to anyone. Jingle, jangle, jingle, jingle. Does anyone know how to change the jingle jangle on their phone? Because mine's just, just a standard phone.
Do you remember years ago with the Nokia's? I used to sell contracts for Nokia's back in the day, back in 2001, summer, which is blimey, it's nearly 20 years ago. 19 years ago, I was selling contracts, basically giving away a free mobile phone with a phone contract, phoning people up, cold calling. And I remember I phoned one person up and he said, listen, mate, not being funny, which usually leads to some kind of threat, not being funny.
But I'm at my brother's funeral. I was about to say, Oh God, I'm so sorry. He said, can you call back in two hours? Okay.
And I did. And he took the contract. It's like, blimey.
Yeah, it's just, it was the last thing I expected him to say. I thought he was gonna just lay into me on the phone, like, tell me off. Tell me I was being a naughty boy.
But nope, not being funny though, mate, I'm being funny, but not being funny. It's weird how those sentences, because I'm not being funny. Sounds like it'd be a nice thing, but it's never a nice thing.
Nothing generally doesn't lead to a nice sentence afterwards. Well, I'm not being funny, but what a lovely day outside. Not being funny, but those jeans fit you like a glove.
They look lovely. You know, just, well, I'm not being funny though. You ever say that again? I'm a gangsta.
So yeah, I, wow. 20 years ago, today, Sergeant Pepper taught his band to play. Wow.
I wonder what it's like to be in the Beatles. I mean, now, not then, but now. Not in the Beatles now, but you know, they're always going to be the Beatles.
The remaining two, well, all four of them, they're always going to, you know what I mean, regardless of what they did afterwards, the Beatles is going to be what they're going to be remembered for. And even though they're all successful after the Beatles, I mean, John Lennon had huge hits. And, you know, sort of tried to end the Vietnam War, didn't he? And there was Paul McCartney created Wings, which is another massive band and had huge hits for them and then had massive hits on his own.
And, you know, toured the world for years and years, decades, becoming the highest paid recording artist in the world at one point. And what's his name? The guitarist. Oh, this is terrible, isn't it, if he'd gotten his name.
But he'd, again, he did loads of good stuff, didn't he? He's like, Oh my Lord, sweet Lord, I only want to kiss you. I only want to love you. And that was like one of the biggest hits ever, wasn't it? And why has this name gone out of my head? OK, I'll close my eyes and I can see it.
John Lennon, Paul McCartney. No, it's gone. So he was in the Travelling Wilburys as well, which I really liked.
And if you don't know who they are or who they were, they was basically a super group. There was Roy Orbison, Bob Dylan, the bloke from ELO, is it Tom Pets? And I still can't think of his name. That's weird, isn't it? So he did all that, it was a huge star game carried on.
And he, you know, and then he was in the Travelling Wilburys that were huge. Wow. And then Ringo Starr, he did the voice of Thomas the Tank Engine.
So they all had their, they all, you know, they all went on to really amazing things after the Beatles. Oh, Thomas. Thomas had a sandwich.
What is his name? Not Bruce Springsteen. Is it Paul? Let's see if I can get the, I should be able to know the first names. John, Paul, Ringo, John, Paul and Ringo.
Why is, it's weird, this is a blank. This is like a blank, just disappeared. His name's disappeared.
It's not that I don't know him. I didn't know him, but it's not that I don't know who he is or his music, because I do, but just not Trevor. Oh man, Trevor, Heather, Stevie, Libby, Prince, Ringo, George Harrison.
Yeah, George Harrison. How could I forget George Harrison? And I was a big, see, I was a Beatles fan. I mean, they'd finished before I was even born, but, you know, I inherited, anyone born in the 70s inherited the Beatles, because they were still so famous, and all of the Beatles were still active, kind of.
And even during the 80s as well, like the early 80s with John, Paul McCartney like dominated the 80s, didn't he, in some ways. And George Harrison had a resurgence in the 80s, I think the late 80s, where he did, um, he had an album. It was a massive hit, massive, you know, it was one is When We Were Fab.
Another one was, I forget the name of the song, but it's really good. I liked it. And I bought the album.
And I liked the When We Were Fab one. I wasn't really that keen on the album. So I chucked it at a horse.
No, I didn't. I didn't do that. I, that happened a couple of times.
It happened with three different people. I bought their albums, and I didn't like the albums. Loved the song that was in the charts.
But I didn't really like the albums. It happened with George Harrison. I didn't dislike the album.
I didn't buy the CD. I bought the album, it was a tape. Might be, yeah, it was a tape probably.
Cassette tape. And the other one was Bruce Springsteen. Again, late 80s.
I think it was when he said, Hey, little girl, is your daddy home? Is he gonna leave you all alone? Got a bad desire. I'm on fire. So I got that.
And I thought, no, no, I didn't like that. But it might not have been that album. But it was a song that was really good, that I liked.
It wasn't like Born in the USA or anything like that. It was the later. I just didn't really like the album very much.
So yeah. And the same thing happened with Prince. I bought, I think it was Sign of the Times.
Loved that song, Sign of the Times. At the time, at the time, it was a Sign of the Times.Me liking the Sign of the Times.
I loved that song. I like stuff that Prince did. But I never bought his albums or listened to.
I don't know any of his album tracks. But there was a time when he was releasing an album a week, wasn't there? Online. And he was so prolific.
And I bought one album and there was about 150 songs on it. It was like, that's too many. Too many songs.
You know, it's, yeah. So I mean, the two probably favorite songs of mine from him was Alphabet Street. I'm going down to Alphabet Street.
I'm going to crown the first girl there that me.Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. To make a better day.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Better day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's gonna be okay. Excuse me. And I know he did lots and lots and lots of songs.
Had lots of hits. But that and Sign of the Times were two of my favorite ones. But I bought the album and I just didn't, I mean, I remember I used to watch this TV show.
When I worked in a chip shop, I'd get home. Well, I lived above the chip shop. So I'd get home, basically.
I'd walk out the door and I'd be home. I didn't live outside, but there was another door. And because I think the place closed at nine.
So I'd be out there by probably half nine. Depending on how busy it was, it was quiet. I'm guessing, I think it was nine.
But if it was really busy, then it'd take longer to sort of tidy up. You know, clean everything down or pretend to. And I used to watch late night telly.
Even though I had to be up again early. I had to start again at nine in the morning or half eight or I don't know what time it was. There was, I'd be in there.
Yeah, I'd be in there. Yeah, about nine, maybe earlier, maybe eight, thirty, eight. But I'd watch late night telly, but I was young.
And I could just, I could get away with not sleeping much, really. And there used to be this late night television show that I'd listen to, I'd watch. And it was a music show.
What it was basically is there'd be three people on a panel or behind a desk. And they'd watch a new video before it's been released. Like it's a new video.
The song's not been released or anything, but just a random new song. And, you know, I think they did maybe, they played perhaps three or four songs. During that half hour.
And then they'd talk about it and say, oh, I liked that, didn't like it. Yeah. And I think they gave it a score, like out of 10.
Anyway, Alphabet Street, they played it. And it was the first video that got everyone excited. The first one that got a 10 out of 10 from everyone on the panel.
And because it was such a great video. I mean, he was ahead of his time in every aspect. Apart from growth, I guess, because he wasn't human size, was he? But he was, but even then, I suppose, maybe with the overpopulation of the planet, being smaller probably would be more helpful, wouldn't it? So if everyone kind of did what he did and became half the size of a human, adult, there'd be more, there'd be more room to maneuver around.
And I wonder what he could have done if he wasn't a singer or a musician. What would he have done? Because he was born, he was born great, wasn't he? He was born a genius. He was a musical genius.
But he was born with special to do something. He was never gonna, I don't think he was ever going to be a plumber. There's nothing wrong with being a plumber and you can be special and be a plumber.
But I just like, he, that's what I think. I think someone like Mike Tyson, what could he have done? He, well, we saw what he could do outside of the boxing ring, but I'm just saying he was a boxer. He was a fighter.
He's, I guess this is different though, because society turned him into that. His environment turned him into being a fighter. Because there's loads of people walking around that could punch just as hard as a heavyweight champion of the world.
They, some of them don't even know it. But they're just not that way inclined. They don't have any aggression in them.
So yeah, it's, I like that idea. There's people, there's people that might even be listening to this that can sing just as well as Whitney Houston at her, at the top of her career. But they might just not have the confidence to sing in public or to go on one of these talent shows.
So I suppose with Prince, he, he never looked very confident. I'm not talking about when he was singing or dancing. He looked, no one looked more confident than him when he was doing that.
But I've seen him in interviews on YouTube since he, you know, passed away in that. Because I'm a little bit intrigued by him because he was, the word geniuses can be overused sometimes. He was something special.
He was like, and I'm not even particularly a fan of his, but you know, I'm not like a hardcore fan, but it was phenomenal. He was what he could do and he could play pretty much any, every instrument. He could sing, he could sing at different levels as well.
Like high pitched and low. And he, it sounds like I'm not really trying to sort of get off with him. I'm not.
I'm just saying, I'm trying to chat him up. I'm not trying to chat him up. He's dead, but it was phenomenal.
I always liked the idea that we've all got that in us. Not, we haven't all got like a little Prince in us, although I suppose he could fit, could fit somewhere, but he's so little. But no, but he's the Prince, the Prince butt plug.
No, little Prince vibrate. So I really, I like the idea that everyone's got a talent inside them, inside them, in, you know, some, everyone's got a talent, something that's unique to them. But most people don't, well, a lot of people haven't found out what it is yet.
Maybe. I have a theory that if, if people did find out what it was, then it might be a wrong theory. I just figured that they'd be happy or happier if they were doing something they love doing, even if they didn't earn a living out of it, they could still, so if someone was a singer or a light racing cars, you know, like a brilliant driver, even if they didn't earn a living as formula one, they could at least do stock car racing or do the, like the, the lower down version of it, where it's all, which is open to most people.
Because with formula one, the only way to get into formula one is by having, basically your parents invest an absolute fortune in you from a very young age to basically groom you to be into that position. You can't just walk. It doesn't matter how good a driver you are.
You can't just walk. Well, you wouldn't walk, would you? You'd drive, wouldn't you? But you can't just drive into that job. If you walked in, where's your car? You can't just drive in, say, I'd like to have a, can I have a go please? They said no, which to me doesn't seem right.
It means very elitist, like extremely elitist, because basically the cars cost more than a house. You know, it's not, it's not a real racing, is it? It's not the car. I mean, a real race is pedal bikes or go karts.
That's a real, I mean, in a way, really, I'm not a driver, but I've seen people drive. I've been a passenger on probably a few thousand occasions. And it seems to be, I don't watch, I don't really follow the formula racing.
My brother loves it. He loves it. But even though I don't follow it, I'm not a fan of them reducing the sound.
That's part of, you know, the like, it's to me, that was part of the fun of it. And the crashes, I suppose, if we're honest. But I just, it always seemed to be that it was, it wasn't really down to the drivers as much as how powerful the cars were.
Ferrari and was it Toyota? I don't know, whatever the different cars that drive. Ford. Did the Ford enter into it? Vauxhall.
I'm not sure if Vauxhall Cavaliers are in there. And BMW, surely, because they're good cars. The Rover.
I wonder why they're called cars Rovers, because Rover used to be a good name for a dog, didn't it? Here, Rover. Here, Rover. It's a good boy, Rover.
Oh, you're a good boy. Get off my car. It's my car.
Leave me alone. I'm sorry. All you do is make dog.
Yes, it's called Rover. It's got a written Rover on the back. Does it look like a dog? It doesn't look like a car.
Wow, what's that? So, I'm just seeing something on telly. It's on mute. What's the TV show that they're advertising? I don't know, but I fall in love with one of the women on there.
Oh my goodness, what is it? Total Bellas. The funny dance show. Really? Hollywood medium.
Retirement. Oh, okay. Keeping up with the Kardashians.
I think that was the Kardashians. I don't know. I fancy a Kardashian.
I wonder how I'll get on with that idea. Yeah, I think I'll get out of their league. I'm in a different league to them.
I wonder what that would be like living in a Kardashian world where there are cameras always. I mean, they've got cameras down in the toilets. Seriously, it's like, wow.
Can you imagine, you know, you have a romantic night, meet one of the ladies of a romantic night and it's going really well. It's like, wow, I can't believe she likes me. And, you know, she slips into something more comfortable and a rain mack or a duffle coat.
And you think, you know what I'm going to do? I want to make sure that she has, I give her the most pleasure that she's ever had. I like to kid myself. And you suddenly, you know, you kiss your way down the belly and you get to the special place and you have to ask the cameraman to get out.
I'm like, can you please, can you please step out of there? You know, it must be annoying to have camera people always everywhere. I'm not, I'm not saying, I'm not saying that Kim Kardashian could fit a whole human person holding a camera inside. I'm not saying, it wasn't what I was saying.
I'm just saying the idea, the visuals of a person holding a camera because they're always although the size of Prince, maybe holding a Prince, holding a camera. There you've been hiding. So I'd imagine it'd be a bit annoying having cameras always there.
How could you have a normal conversation, a genuine conversation with people filming it? Because I've seen, I don't watch the show very often, but I have seen it. And there was an advert for Kim Kardashian, there was an advert, she put a video advert for her TV shows on there a few years ago. It was on Pornhub and she, you know, so I'm watching it.
And then it showed a picture, a video of, they're in a restaurant, showed a picture to the side. And there's about 10 cameramen and women possibly as well, all like around the table. That's just what, oh no, I can't, no, I just, you can't be real in that situation.
It's, I can't, I don't, I can't see how it's possible. I don't know, maybe it is. I don't think it'd be, well, no, I can't see.
I mean, we have a few of those kinds of shows here. Probably the most, one of the most famous ones is The Essex Girl, was it? The Only Way is Essex. And you can even see, because it's set up and they're set up to have confrontation and these personal conversations about their relationships.
And you can even see that they try not to laugh sometimes because it's so false. And you can see them trying to pretend to be angry and, which I've noticed that people do in real life as well, which is kind of weird. Never understood that.
I remember one of my stepmothers from the past, she was shouting at me about, I don't know, the room wasn't tidy or, I don't know, I don't know, poo on her bed or something. I don't know, something trivial, stolen some money out of a purse, something silly, something that was, you know, a bit, she was overreacting, set fire to her hair. And anyway, she used to shout at me and the phone rang.
So she's like, oh, I've had enough of you. Wait till your dad gets home. That's it.
You're just ridiculous. I can't believe you just did that. How could you sell the house without telling us? You can't just sell our house.
You didn't get a good price. Where are we going to live? And then the phone rings like, hello, 456792. How can I help? Like, you know, one of her legs being bent back in some kind of pose.
By the way, in the old days, late 70s, 80s, people used to say the number, the telephone number, 742539456752826725973, 4257217676, 92345283945, you know, just whatever numbers are. And I started to doubt whether that was true, because it sounds absolutely ridiculous. Why would you say your own number? But I was watching a TV show the other day, well, that's a few weeks ago, The Professionals, and Bodhi, because Bodhi and Doyle, that was a theme tune, a brilliant theme tune.
Check it out on YouTube if you're still awake, if you're not still awake. And he was with his girlfriend, Bodhi, and he should have been James Bond after, what's his name, Roger Moore. Bodhi should have been the next James Bond, but he didn't get the gig for some reason.
But he was definitely right for the part. Anyway, he would have been a bit kind of similar to Craig Daniels, Craig David, Daniel, whatever, similar to that, you know, kind of a bit broody, but yeah, better looking. He was, old Bodhi, he was a proper heartthrob.
And I don't know why he never, he didn't sort of really go on to do that much. He did a lot of acting, I think, on stage after The Professionals, but he was like a huge star. But Doyle, who's his partner now, he went on to do loads of stuff on telly, playing judges and long, long TV, he had a massive long TV career, and still going now.
So Bodhi, I think his girlfriend's in the bathroom, and she says something to him, why don't you have some juice? And he said, why? What's in it? She says, oh, it's some special food, it's great for your libido. And he says something like, well, didn't I knew you'd help with that? And then the phone rings, and he answers it. Which, considering it's her home, it's a bit rude to answer someone else's phone.
That happened to me once, in the office where I worked. Someone phoned me up, I met this female, gave her my number. She called me, we've held her number, bless her.
My friend, who I was working with, female, answered the phone, and then she hung up. Not the one that answered the phone, the other one. I never heard from her again.
I thought we were going to get married and everything. Mind you, when she refused to give me her telephone number, I suppose that was a clue. Anyway, and she, yeah, and then Bodhi says, well, I didn't think I needed help.
In the libido section, department, and she laughs. And then the phone rings, he answers the phone, and he says, 729-4347. And I thought, wow, that was true.
It's one of those memories, it sounds ridiculous, that people would actually answer the phone by saying their own telephone number. But people did it for possibly decades. It was a done thing.
It's what I did when I was a kid, it's what I was brought up to do. Answer the telephone and say, hello, 724-723. I don't know if that was a number or not, I can't remember.
And she'd just be like, why am I telling them the number? They've just called me. They know the number, don't they? So it never really made much sense to me. And I used to say that to people.
Whenever I'd phone them and they'd give me the number, I said, I know what your number is, I just bloody called it. I just dialed the number. It's almost as if you're going to phone someone up, and let's say the number is 72727273.
And they answer the phone saying, hello, 72727274. And you think, oh, I've dialed the wrong number. Sorry about that.
And you put the phone down. That's not going to happen, is it? Especially as the more often someone repeats what they say, the more slurred they get. So what originally was 649532, 649532, 649532, used to be like that with the Evening Standard newspaper in London.
I say used to be, I don't, I've lived there for a long time. But it was the Evening Standard, they were supposed to say, Evening Standard, Evening Standard. And it just ended up going, you, you, you, you.
It's like that on some, there is like a fruit and a vegetable in my town. And I can't help but laugh and sort of repeat what they say, because they can't even say the sentence anymore. Like two, is it two pears for a pound? Or whether it's a pound, and it's pointless.
There's just no point in shouting it out because no one can understand. In fact, I reckon if you said to them, what did you just say? They would answer, I don't know. I'm really not sure.
I used to say something. And now it's just a noise. It's a murmur.
And I'm a little bit embarrassed. So I just keep doing it because I think that's what people expect. Oh, okay.
So yeah, I've covered most things that have happened in the world. So that's good. Oh, yeah, baby.
I'm hoping, though it is 3.28. So yeah, I'm hoping to do a couple more recordings today. Yesterday, I was busy, so I didn't get a chance. I was relaxing.
And, yeah, I want to try and get a few more recordings done. Once I've done my website, I'll finish that, and I can get on. And, you know, but if there is anyone still listening, I just want to say that some people are telling me that I'm perhaps a little bit, I'm too interesting, which I don't quite get.
Because I know I am boring. But I do do other recordings, which are very, very focused on sleep, as far as the Sleep Hypnosis Weekly. So they last half an hour.
And the new ones, there's also two versions, one with music, which lasts about 52 minutes. And I do the Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis sessions. They last for about 20 minutes each.
There's 220 of those. Also, the Relaxation for Stress podcast, I do long relaxation sessions on there as well. So there are other podcasts that might, maybe more useful, or useful in a different way.
So it's, you know, if you're still awake at the end of this, maybe listen to one of those, because it'll just be me talking or whispering slowly and very much focused on sleep, instead of just waffling on about nothing, which I do in these podcasts. So I'm going to go. I wish you all the happiness.
Stay safe, stay calm and relaxed. Remember to be kind to yourself, because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love.
Bye.
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.